You know that the MTV Movie Awards have become a complete skill for the movie industry if you check out the category they stuck in at the end Best Summer Movie You Haven’t Seen Yet. Then the movie that garnished the most nominations, along with 300, was a movie that everyone panned, but who’s third installment in the series is also coming this summer. With that said, I’ll still be tuning in June 3rd mostly because for the first time in what seems like forever, an MTV awards show may actually have a host that may be funny in Sarah Silverman. Here are the nominations and you can always head over to MTV.com to cast your vote or Yahoo.com to vote for your favorite fan submitted spoofs:
Maybe it is a generational thing, but I have never understood the whole Borat phenomenon. Same with Will Ferrell, someone really needs to tell explain how they actually find them funny. But with that said, I have a feeling there will be a Borat sweep. Personally as a big fan of homoerotic history, 300 was the best movie here.
Who Will Win: Will Smith Who I Voted For: Gerard Butler
You can trace the point when the Movie Awards started to suck to when they started nominated the same actors that the academy awards did and here you have four actors nominated for the characters they have played. What ever happened to Most Desirable Female? But anyways. Even though he was great in the first, Depp seemed to be mailing it in with the second, so I go with Butler. But I got to wonder what was his gayer role, 300 or Phantom of the Opera.
Breakthrough Performance Emily Blunt, The Devil Wears Prada Abigail Breslin, Little Miss Sunshine Lena Headey, 300 Columbus Short, Stomp the Yard Jaden Smith, The Pursuit of Happyness Justin Timberlake, Alpha Dog
Who Will Win: Abigail Breslin Who I Voted For: Columbus Short
Justin Timberlake’s inclusion here begs the question how can you actually have a breakout performance in a movie no one saw? Not that it matter, Breslin will runaway with it because all the future stars of To Catch a Predator most likely liked her stripper routine a little to me. Since I’m against the exploitation of eight year olds, I went with Short not for Stop the Yard per say, but I loved his performance on Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip.
Best Comedic Performance Emily Blunt, The Devil Wears Prada Sacha Baron Cohen, Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan Will Ferrell, Blades of Glory Adam Sandler, Click Ben Stiller, Night at the Museum
Who Will Win: Sacha Baron Cohen Who I Voted For: Adam Sandler
Well Click was the only movie on this list that I actually saw so that is the easy choice. For further reasons why I would vote for Sandler, take a look at the name of this blog.
Who Will Win: Tobin Bell Who I Voted For: Bill Nighy
If I’m not mistake, Bell won last year and that will most likely continue not just this year but next. Hopefully there may be some Saw fatigue so Nighy wins as he was the lone bright spot in an otherwise bland movie. Although if he does end up winning, the award should also go to the CGI people that created his tentacle beard.
Best Fight Jack Black & Héctor Jiménez vs. Los Duendes (Wrestling Match), Nacho Libre Gerard Butler vs. The Uber Immortal (The Spartan/Persian Battle), 300 Sacha Baron Cohen vs. Ken Davitian (Naked Wrestle Fight), Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan Will Ferrell vs. Jon Heder (Ice Rink Fight), Blades of Glory Uma Thurman vs. Anna Faris (Super Girl Fight), My Super Ex-Girlfriend
Who Will Win: Sacha Baron Cohen vs. Ken Davitian Who I Voted For: Gerard Butler vs. The Uber Immortal
Who would have though that Best Fight would be the gayest category ever? They might as while send these montages to the Secretary of Defense in hopes of overturning their Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy.
Best Summer Movie You Haven't Seen Yet Evan Almighty (June 22) Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (June 15) Hairspray (July 20) Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (July 13) Rush Hour 3 (August 10) Transformers (July 4)
Who Will Win: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix Who I Voted For: Transformers
Yeah, this was pretty worthless. And where’s I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry?
Big News of the Week: May Sweeps in Full Swing: It’s is may and the networks are bringing out the big guns: Barney appears on The Price Is Right (How I Met Your Mother), the Heroes fast forward five years, Veronica Mars returns, My Name Is Earl has Smell-a-Vision (check the latest issue of TV Guide for your sniff card), Smallville goes noir, Tyra Collette returns to Supernatural, and next Sunday NBC gives us Saturday Night Live in the ‘90s: Pop Culture Nation. With all that, there will be only one Pick of the Week which you will have to wait until the end of this post.
One thing you won’t be seeing during May Sweeps is Drive which Fox pulled. I believe I called that before it ever aired. So you can add that show to The Lone Gunmen, Undeclared, Firefly, A Minute with Stan Hooper, Keen Eddie, Wonderfalls, The Jury, The Inside, Point Pleasant, Reunion. But anyways. And the 9th Green may even get into the sweeps fever with an upcoming contest. I haven’t gotten the prize(s) yet so I don’t want to jinx it by telling you what it is, but be sure to keep a look out for it. As a hint, even though the name may fool you, the prize has nothing to do with the dude who sang 3 AM. (Scooter's Note: If the deal falls through, I will disavow that the last sentence ever happened)
Heroes: Well that sucked massively. Yeah I knew from the moment the shard of glass entered Peter’s head he wasn’t actually going to be dead, but a fan of good acting can hope that he was actually killed of the show. Then the episode ended with a potential jump the shark moment when Hiro came face to face with Future Hiro. Anyone who has seen Back to the Future if you were to meet your future self it would rip a hole in the time/space continuum. Check out the latest episode over at NBC.com.
RW/RR Challenge: The Inferno III: I probably laughed a little to long after Rachel lost to Jenn. Really, how can you lose three straight after being up 2-0? She was definitely right to leave in shame without saying goodbye to anyone. Check out the latest episode over at MTV.com or download at iTunes.
Lost: Yawn. Have Sun and Jin ever had an interesting flashback? But that’s not to say the episode was a complete wash with the return of Eyepatch dude. I theorized a couple weeks ago that Miss Cleo was a little to eager to commit suicide and that that they knew they would come back. Even as far back as season one I theorized that Boone, Ethan, and the Federal Marshall would be what was down in the hatch. But I backed off those theories realizing that then they couldn’t possibly bring everyone back. But there was Eyepatch dude and I really doubt he just so happened to have an eyepatch over the same eye.
The other big news was random chick from the skies’ reveal that the flight was already recovered with no survivors which brought back all the purgatory rumors. My theory is that whoever wanted the plane to crash in the first place staged a fake crash so no one would keep searching foe them. Check out the latest episodes over at ABC.com.
Survivor: These have got to be some of the dumbest contestants in the history of Survivor. Which is a good thing because you never know what they are going to do leading to many unpredictable episodes this season. First you had the Alex/ Mookie braintrust who, upon finding Yau-Man’s immunity idol, come up with a plan to out Yau instead of just stealing it for themselves. That may have been the dumbest move ever.
Then you have the weakest alliance ever. Yau and Earl are tight. Then you have Cassandra who is loosly ties to the Earl/Yau tandem and to Dreamz. Then there is Stacy and Boo who are complete outsiders. It should be interesting next week to see if they stick together or someone aligns with Alex to gain control of the game. Check out the latest episode on Innertube.
My Name Is Earl: Certainly there was going to be a drop off after the hilarious Norm MacDonald episode last week, but not by much. It was great to see Earl issue out his own brand of karma this week including inadvertently helping the teachers blow up a student’s care. And as grating as Randy sometimes gets, him pouring out some chocolate milk in memory of a fallen teacher was classic. Check out the latest episode over at NBC.com or download at iTunes.
Next Week’s Pick: Veronica Mars, 9:00 Tuesday, The CW: The latest talentless female with a name no one knows has been added to a group that won’t be around in two to three years so that means it is time for the best show on television to finally comeback. If you have yet to check out the show, there is no better time than this week to give it a try (you can always download the whole season on iTunes). It has been eight weeks since Ronnie has solved the Dean’s murder and Parker and Logan looked like they were becoming more than friends. And we will get are first taste of a standalone episode of the show. All leading up to the season finale which some who have\ seen it are calling the best episode in the history of the show which is high praise considering the two previous five star season finales, as well as A Trip to the Dentist and Donut Run and this years gold standards, Spit and Eggs and Mars Bars. Naturally Vee and crew are also the Promo of the Week:
We are not even halfway through the first round and there are some great moments in this year's NFL Draft. Most notably being the Detroit Lions taking a Wide Receiver in the first round (all top ten overall picks) for the fourth time in five years. I don't care if Calvin Johnson was supposedly the best overall talent in the draft, you can't make that move if you are Matt Millen. I have a feeling all GM's got together and made a pact not to trade up to force Millen to draft Johnson. The other enjoyment this year is trying to figure out who looks more disappointed, Brady Quinn or his girlfriend. You can tell she is visualizing her engagement ring shrink smaller with each passing pick.
As for my team, the Cleveland Browns, like I said earlier this week, with a playoff drought (one appearance in over a decade), the Draft is pretty much the Super Bowl for us. Here a look at their picks (will be updated throughout the weekend as they pick):
1st Round (3rd Overall): Joe Thomas - OT Wisconsin: First I'd like to say thank you to the Browns for taking my advise to pass on Quinn, although I wouldn't be against trading up to get him at this point. Great pick with Thomas to help sure up one of the worst O-lines in the league. The reason why the Browns are near the bottom in passing and rushing is not because of the personnel (totally), but the defense gets to the ball too quick. This should plug one of the many holes.
1st Round (22nd Overall from Dallas): Brady Quinn - QB Notre Dame: I'd like to say I called it and thought it was a good move, until I heard the terms of the deal. The Browns gave up the 2nd round pick and their first round pick for the 2008 draft. Bad decision considering that the Browns most likely won't be picking 22 or higher next season. I guess when you were heavily thinking about picking Quinn at three, it is worth giving up next year's number 1 unless we end up with a top 2 pick next year.
2nd Round (53rd Overall from Dallas): Eric Wright - CB UNLV: After they traded away their second round pick to Dallas in the Quinn deal, I though the Browns first day was over but checking out the draft this morning I saw they made another trade with the Cowboys this time giving up their third and fourth round pick and swapping six rounders. I was hoping the Browns would focus on the aging front line because the more pressure you get on the QB, the better the backfield gets. And not surprisingly a dude named after Eazy-Z comes with characters issues stemming from an alleged rape, charges that were later dropped but led him to transfer to UNLV from USC. But looking on the bright side, in the two years he lived in Las Vegas, he not once made it rain at a strip club, so he has that going for him.
Now I understand that many of my readers are not big sports fans and for those that are may not care about the Browns, so here is a little something extra for you and Reason #69 to watch Veronica Mars: Dick Casablancas. Enjoy (and don't forget to tune in May 1st).
With Rage Against the Machine, Tom Morello help create the hard rock/rap mash up genre that got ruined by lesser bands in the late nineties. Then he took a step back in time with the seventies arena rock of Audioslave. Now he is going even further back in time musically with his latest outfit, The Nightwatchman. As the one man band, Morello is channeling such folk heroes as Woody Guthrie and Pete Seeger. The Nightwatchman came to fruition during the Audioslave era when Morello needed an output during the Bush administration with lead singer’s Chris Cornell’s moratorium on political songs.
So between Audioslave gigs, Morello would go to local coffee houses and sign up for local mike nights under the moniker The Nightwatchman with songs about the war. And with Audioslave on indefinite (and it looks now like a permanent) hiatus, Morello had time on his hand to make an album of these songs called One Man Revolution. And just like Audioslave was pretty much how you expected a combination of Rage Against and Soundgarden, The Nightwatchman is pretty much what you would expect Morello would sound if he unplugged and did his best Bruce Springsteen circa Nebraska impression.
With his weapon of choose, the guitar, rendered useless by going acoustic, Morello has to rely on his voice and lyrics to get his point across without a front man to do it for him. To hear him sing is at first a little jarring with the deep baritone. The lyrics are hit and miss as Morello isn’t adept to writing folk songs yet and even clumsily steals the line, “three times I shot the sheriff, but I did not spare the deputy.” And with the little background noise, you will notice Morello’s out there political views, which is something you can overlook with Rage because, well, the rock.
Though hearing anti-war songs from Tom Morello are much more palatable than ill-advised ones from Maroon 5 or Sum41 who just seem like jumping on the “Yeah we hate Bush too” bandwagon because it is in vogue. Although oddly enough the only administration aide Morello calls out by name is Colin Powell who is long gone but Morello never cared about letting the lesser of two evils off the hooks as Rage famously protested the Democratic National Convention. But as anti-war albums, Neil Young’s Living with War is still much better than One Man Revolution.
There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I though I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form so here they are courtesy of YouTube. I advise you to watch them before you read my reviews if you don’t want me to spoil things. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available, if not the link goes to YouTube where you can watch the video in full screen). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.
Another week, another video from Snow Patrol. Even though the song is much better than Signal Fire, the Spiderman themed video is much better than the, um, whatever this video is supposed to be. But at least there aren’t any scenes from a crappy television show intertwined with the performance. You can check out my review of the album at The Final Word in the Final Sentance.
Apparently when not providing the soundtrack to Zach Braff’s life, the boys in The Shins are doing their part to make the world a better place by releasing balloons back into their natural habitat. This video may actually funnier than anything Braff has ever written. You can check out my review of the album at Born to Gaze into Nigh Skies.
Really, who needs treadmills when you have friends in multicolored shirts? Certainly not Canadian songstress Feist. And just a reminder, her album, The Reminder, comes out next Tuesday, May 1, which just happens to be the day that Veronica Mars come back with all new episodes.
Nobody in recent years had a bigger buzz leading up to the release of their album than Arctic Monkeys. Then the album was released and they were met with general indifference. Yeah, not even the Beatles could have lived up to that kind of hype, but Whatever People Say I Am, That’s What I’m Not was a good album (that landed at number 14 on my 50 Best Albums of 2006). Who know why the band was ignored, my guess is that, even though most people lose their accents when singing, Alex Turner’s vocals still sounds very British.
And if the British thing is what kept Americans from jumping on the bandwagon for the first album, it’s doubtful the second will change their mind, right down to the extra British “U” in the album’s title, Favourite Worst Nightmare. The disk may even be less palatable to the general audience here as the disk is distinctly harder and faster as evident with the album opener first single, Brianstorm, a jarring sound of guitars that will command your attention right from the start.
But much like on the last album, the band is at its best when it goes into the mid-tempo area with quirky lyrics that cleverly rhyme and nowhere on Favourite Worst Nightmare is that displayed than of Florescent Adolescent a song about a girl gone wild who is wild no more as she, “used to get it in your fishnets now you only get it in your nightdress.” With two good albums in as many years, the Arctic Monkeys may be providing those who like real music for years to come, long after the current crop of dudes wearing eyeliner are resigned to VH1 reality shows.
There are three different reasons why someone would watch VH1’s Celebrity Fit Club: 1) For good heath tips, 2) Like other “celebrity” reality shows, to see has-been’s try for one last chance at the spot light, 3) to watch addicts go through withdrawal. As much as I’d like to say the reason I occasionally check out the show if for reason number one, the third is more realistically the reason. And lets face it as much as America wants to deny it, food has become an addiction.
Now it’s fifth season, Celebrity Fit Club for the first time will be split between Men and Woman. It is somewhat surprising the show has lasted this long as when it started I doubted they could continually find even C-Listers that would be willing to come on a show that basically is meant to show how fat they have become. But you really have to admire anyone who would come on a show like this because it shows they are willing to overcome the humiliation in order to try to live a healthier life. This years cast includes:
Maureen McCormick: I’m not sure what is more surprising, that Marsha Brady (the third Brady to be featured on a VH1 reality show) has packed on the pounds or that she is fifty. Although I have a feeling that news is worse for people actually alive when The Brady Bunch was on the air.
Tiffany: The former Mall Rat is just four years removed from appearing in Playboy (seriously? Her?). Just goes to show everyone how quick you can gain weight.
Da Brat: On her second tour of VH1 reality shows. How soon until she drops in on the Hogan family?
Kimberley Locke: I’ve never heard of her before this show but how bad of a karaoker do you have to be if you lose to Clay Aiken?
Dustin Diamond: Every season has their obligatory psychotic jackass, see Daniel Baldwin (his appearance makes his brother’s recent phone call seem reasonable) and Jeff Conaway, and it looks like Screech will be this one.
Warren G: There’s always a contestant every season where you go “No not him/her” and Warren G is that for me this season. Regulate is one of the Top 10 greatest rap songs of all time.
Ross the Intern: Again I have no clue who this is but I’m surprised that Ant would let someone on the show that is gayer than he is.
Somewhat of a lackluster cast, c’mon, where are all the morbidly obese “celebrities” this time around? For people who watch the show for the second reason, some of the most entertaining moments, and most weight lose, come from these people like seeing Bruce Vilanch doing the long jump are seeing Big Pussy take as much time to run a quarter of a mile as it does for some people to run a whole mile. And there was a little shake up with the judges as Linda Papadopoulos and her too much makeup is released and is replaced by the seemingly more no-nonsense Stacy Kaiser. Luckily Harvey Walden IV, the best token grumpy judge in all reality television, is back as the trainer. Hopefully he will literally smack Screech around this season.
Verdict: Not really must see TV, but I always get some good helpful hints on how I, myself, can live a healthier lifestyle, even if I tend to be eating potato chips whenever I turn the show on. Celebrity Fit Club: Men vs. Women airs Sunday at 9:00 on VH1.
Quote of the Week: “That explains your low sex drive, and why you rented Memoirs of a Geisha last night. Man, that was the worst kung-fu movie ever.” (Earl Hickey, My Name Is Earl)
Song of the Week: Free Bird - Lynyrd Skynyrd (as sung by Earl Hickey, My Name Is Earl)
Big News of the Week: Only nine days until the return of Veronica Mars. Now there are conflicting reports to just how safe the show is for returning next fall. Granted the people that say it is already canceled are hiding behind unnamed “sources” while the people who actually work with the show say they haven’t heard any such thing. Either way, the upcoming episode may be a make or break one. So if you do not currently watch, this is me begging, I’m on my knees, please tune into The CW May 1st at 9:00, or sometime afterwards, stream the episode at CWTV.com, and you can even download an episode over at iTunes for the low price of $1.99. You can’t even fill up your lawnmower for that low of price.
As for all of you already on the Veronica Mars bandwagon, this is the time to do some blanket marketing because, lets face it, The CW only likes to promote its reality shows. Remind people of the show on a blog, message boards, post a bulletin for all your friends at MySpace. If you have free time and are near a college, you can print out the flyer below (click to enlarge) and post them around high traffic areas on campus. And for more ideas check out SaveVeronicaMars.tv.
Scooter Update: Here are a couple of banners promoting the return of Veronica Mars. Feel free to put them on your own blogs as you wish as the fit nice and cozy on the sidebar. Many thanks to Jonathan P. for creating them.
RW/RR Challenge: The Inferno III: During my First Impressions on the show I said that the only way the Good Guys would win a challenge would be if the Bad Asses implode and it didn’t take them long to do so with infighting and Danny going insane. Can we put money on another person getting the boot for throwing a punch? Check out the latest episode over at MTV.com.
Lost: Yeah, this whole, will Charlie live or die thing is getting old quick. Hopefully this gets resolved by the end of the season because I was already hoping Charlie actually got hit with the arrow just so the whole thing isn’t drug out like typical Lost fashion. I guess how long this will go on will be determine by whether Desmond truly believed it would have been Penny on the other end of the parachute had he let him die. Back in camp I loved how Sawyer felt obligated to make Kate a mixtape because she was nice enough to give him another go around. Check out the latest episodes over at ABC.com.
Survivor: After a slow start, this season is turning out to be one of the more entertaining seasons in recent years with three great tribal councils in as many episodes. The look on Alex’s face when votes started to come in for Eduardo after strutting up to Probst with the idol was priceless. Check out the latest episode on Innertube.
Smallville: About half way through this episode I realized that I could care less about Chloe’s mom. I think she has only been mentioned twice and there was no lead up to this episode about her. And from the ending, it looks like we won’t be hearing from her again. But we did get the huge shocker that Lex faked Lana’s pregnancy. I totally didn’t see that coming. But I guess that explains why she never once was showing even though she had to be pregnant for awhile. Should be interesting how this plays out.
My Name Is Earl: After Our Cops Is On, I didn’t expect to see a funnier half hour of television this season, then enter Norm MacDonald and his, um, melons. And what better role for Norm to play than Burt Reynolds son as he was the best contestant ever on Celebrity Jeopardy. Then the scene where he steps in front of the pitching machine is the most cringworthy thing ever that made me laugh at the same time. It is probably too late to get him on later this season (unless he has already filmed then), but please have more Little Chubby next season. Norm aside, the opening scene hit very close to home for me because I too just kept my ties tied because I never learned how to do it myself until a college classmate forced me to learn after I asked him to tie my tie for me one too many times. Check out the latest episode over at NBC.com or download the episode on iTunes.
Promo of the Week: Another great fan made promo, this time thanking Veronica Mars sponsor MasterCard for supporting the show. Although I can’t help but wonder where the Aerie Girl thank you is:
Next Week’s Pick: NFL Draft, Saturday and Sunday at 12:00 on ESPN: For those of us who’s team we root for haven’t sniffed the playoffs in years, this is our Super Bowl. And as an added bonus, tune in to see if Matt Millen takes yet another Wide Receiver with the Lions pick at number two which would be their fourth WR taken with their top pick (all in the overall top ten) in five years. As for the Browns at number three, please, please don’t take Brady Quinn. In fact, don’t take anyone, trade down and stockpile draft picks. But whatever you do, do not take Brady Quinn.
In completely unrelated television news, today is Earth Day and in honor of it Home Depot is giving away 1,000,000 Compact Fluorescent Light Bulbs. I switched over to energy efficient light bulbs a year ago and there is really no reason not to switch if you haven’t done so yourself. It is a win-win situation, it is good for the environment (Hope Depot says that the million light bulbs will save enough energy it is the equivalent of removing 70,000 cars from the road), plus you will save a lot of money on your electric bill. And despite the extra cost, you will be able to make back the difference from regular light bulbs within a month and after that it is extra money in your pocket (plus they last longer). So if you are still unconvinced, stop by your local Home Depot and pick up a free one to see for yourself, but be sure to get there rarely because it is only why supplies last.
You may not know the name Ryan Shaw, but one listen to his music and undoubtedly you will think you have heard him before. Calling his music neo-soul would be a little misleading because there is nothing new about it. As evident on his debut, This Is Ryan Shaw, he doesn’t want to update the classic R&B sound, the Georgia native wants to recreate it.
The album is like a history lesson of R&B music for those born in the eighties or later as Shaw channels classic soul staples like Motown and Stax as unless you already know beforehand, you most likely won’t be able to distinguish which songs are rerecorded from the Golden Era of Soul and which ones Shaw and his writing team wrote for this record. And even though his backing band isn’t the Funk Brothers or Booker T. and the MG’s, they definitely get the job done helping recreate their classic sound.
The album starts off with the obscure Sharpee’s cover, Do the 45 which should start you two tapping and you should be up on your feet by the time the originals We Got Love and Nobody are done as well as a thrilling version of Looking for Love mad popular by Bobby Womack later on the album. Then Shaw shows he can croon with the best of them as evident on Wilson Pickett’s I Found a Love and I’ll Always Love You. If there were one downside to this album is that at thirty-five minutes, it is just too short.
From her first album to her second, there seemed to be growth to Avril Lavigne as she moved from the power pop to a more rock sound. After the second album the maturity seemed to grow as she got married and released the Celine Dion type power balled from a movie that no one saw. Then the Girlfriend video came out and everyone saw that Avril had traded in her neckties for high heels, hot pants, and pink streaks in her hair. It’s almost as see saw Britney shave her hair and thought that if anyone could fill the void of blonde pop princess with a trashy husband, why not her?
With the image makeover, the songs on The Best Damn Thing aren’t musically that far from those that made up her debut. But that makes it a step backwards; sure the songs here are catchy like Complicated, but they are most disposable of disposable pop whereas songs like My Happy Ending have a mush longer staying power. Everything Back but You is just a rehash of Sk8ter Boi, though it does have the best line on the disk, “I wish you were her, you left out the ‘e’.” Classic. When she slow things down things only gets worse. Keep Holding On is stuck on the end, and songs like When You’re Gone just bogs down the album.
One of the reasons why When You’re Gone loses its weight is because you can’t help listening to it and thinking it is about her husband. Seriously, do we really need sappy loves dongs about the dude from Sum41? Even more embarrassing for Whibley than the love song written about him is I Don’t Have to Try where Avril starts of the song in another faux rap like the breakdown from Girlfriend, I’m the one, the one that wears the pants.” But then again, how can you embarrass a guy who is a notch in Paris Hilton’s bedpost.
Hopefully by the next album, Avril will have stopped taking her giddy pills that she took in the making of this album because smiling and happy Avril. As catchy as some of the songs are, they will be forgotten by the time the next power pop girl releases her album of forgettable middle school anthems. And since they seem like they come out once a month, that won’t be too long.
There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I though I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form so here they are courtesy of YouTube. I advise you to watch them before you read my reviews if you don’t want me to spoil things. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available, if not the link goes to YouTube where you can watch the video in full screen). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.
It seems like the soundtrack era has died. Back in the nineties every band seemed willing to send songs not good enough to make there own albums to the soundtrack, most of the songs which never actually appear in the movie so I guess it is a good thing. Another good reason major soundtracks have disappeared, the lame music video tie in where they would mix in scenes from the movie with scenes of the band that usually had nothing to do with the movie. Well maybe that will change with this great video from the Spiderman 3 Soundtrack with an elementary school play reviews the first two movies with Snow Patrol playing the role of the house band conjuring up images of the Crash Test Dummies video. But in true soundtrack fashion, the song itself isn’t nearly as good as anything on their latest album.
Remember the good ol’ days of 2003 when Arrested Development was still on the air and a little band was daring you to move? Now they are both back (sort of) and together in this video. Apparently Buster asking price is so high that Switchfoot couldn’t even afford the licensing fee for Guitar Hero. And if there were an video equivalent to jumping the shark (okay that was a blatant AD reference) it would be when the dead chick from Heroes goes all eighties.
Back when I reviewed the debut album from Corinne Bailey Rae (see Girl Go Ahead Let Your Hair Down), in an album chalk full of good songs, Trouble Sleeping received the coveted Song to Download for the album. And she finally released the song here stateside (it has been out for awhile in England). I dare you to listen to this song and not grab somewhere near and start dancing.
Okay, one more video. Words really cannot describe this video other than it may be the greatest thing ever in the history of YouTube:
The Surreal Life has to hold the record for most spin-offs. It is directly it is responsible for Strange Love, My Fair Brady and The Surreal Life: Fame Games. Strange Love itself gave us Flavor of Love which then spawned I Love New York (which my sources tell me will get a spin-off of its own) and the latest generation to The Surreal Life family tree, Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School. And what a premise the show has, take thirteen of the most outrageous Flavor Flav castoffs, including the porn star, the spitter, and the fighter and teach them proper etiquette. Although after taking a look at the cast, you can’t help but wonder how the girl that did her business in Flav’s hallway didn’t get on the show.
A closer look at the show, though, gave me some reservations on how good the show could be. First it ended up being a competition with weekly vote offs which means the most unrulely, i.e. most entertaining, would leave first making the latter episode uninteresting. Second, having Mo’nique as a Charm School judge would be like letting Paula Abdul judge a singing competition (um, yeah). Then as the show begins Mo’nique does the unthinkable, she burns the nicknames that Flav gave the girls instead opting to call the girls by the names on their birth certificates. I have enough trouble distinguishing Bootz from Buckeey as it is, now I have to figure out whom Larissa and Shay are.
But with all the reservations, Charm School lived up to all expectations. It doesn’t take too long to realize that Charm School isn’t going to help any of these girls and it didn’t take too long before the girls started fighting (over a blog at that) and crying. And as fake as some of them try to be in front of the judges, the claws come out during the interviews. And for the girls to stick around, they have to stick to The Ten Commandments of Charm School including 1) Check Thyself before Thou Wreck Thyself. Yeah, because when I think of proper etiquette, I think of Ice Cube lyrics.
Throughout the series, it looks like they will put the girls though a series of challenges that will make kissing Flavor Flav look like a cakewalk in comparison. The first being to rough it at a campsite which included a two hour walk which took the girls four hours to complete. Then the following day, the girls were split into two team and competed in an obstacle course stolen from Celebrity Fit Club. Naturally the team with Like That, err, Darra lost and were up for expulsion from Charm School. At elimination we get to better know the other judges including an editor for Essence and someone who works for the Miss California pageant who is your token mean-spirited judge. And if anyone knows where I can bet on when the dude gets slapped and by whom, please let me know. In the end, some random chick gets the boot.
Verdict: This will be either the greatest or worst show in the history of television. I leave it up to you to decide which one. As for a prediction, I saying that Goldie, oops, Courtney wins. Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School airs Sundays at 10:00 on VH1.
There is something odd about our society when we get most of our news solely from headlines. When I opened up my e-mail today, a quick headline caught my eye right before I went to the mail page: 20 Dead at Va Tech. I just sat there and stared at the headline instead of going to my e-mail thinking "this is not something that should be reduced to a small headline that most people pass over anyways." Granted I'm not sure what would be a good way to report this kind of news, but five word of less just doesn't seem right. Since I first saw the headline the number has gone up, but the news still remains jarring.
And this is something that will haunt the Virginia Tech campus for years to come as I know from experience. I did my undergrad at Kent State University and the shootings there over three decades ago still hard to escape it despite how hard the administration tries to distance the college away from the incident. A week wouldn't go by where I didn't pass by the May 4th Memorial as I typically had to go by it because of my job, to get to class or to play tennis as the courts are about a hundred feet away.
My heart and prayers go out to the friends and families who lost a loved one today and hopefully someday we as a society realized that we don't we don't need to have the right to own guns anymore.
Earlier this year, Fall Out Boy released Infinity on High and in his review for Rolling Stone, Rob Sheffield wrote:
We're living in a golden age of long song titles, and Fall Out Boy are leading the way. In the olden days, rock stars used parentheses and slashes to prove they were serious artists, refusing to reduce their verbiage for radio DJs or jukeboxes. But in the MySpace era, bands have discovered commas, and as a result song titles have gotten longer than Meat Loaf ever dreamed possible.
And that is the inspiration of this month’s Lyrics Quiz, the over use of the punctuation mark. And I hate to go all English teacher on you, but since this is a quiz about punctuations, you must give the full song title, no shorthand and with correct puncuation. I will be very picky. And of course you must also include the artist’s name. If you do get it right I will unbold the lyric and give you credit. I even threw in a bonus lyric because, 1) it actually doesn’t technically have any punctuation, and 2) I can’t imagine anyone remembering the song and even I had to do some research to remember who sang it. (Please don’t do so yourself unless you don’t plan on answering). So a bonus point to anyone who gets that right. Now onto the quiz:
1. Lenny Bruce is not afraid. (It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I feel Fine) - R.E.M; guessed by Tony) 2. And each time I feel like losing sight, there is one thing I want to know. ((What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace, Love, and Understanding? - Elvis Costello and the Attractions; guessed by Slaygal1981) 3. Mars ain’t the kind place to raise your kids. (Rocket Man (I Think it's Going to Be a Long, Long Time) - Elton John; guessed by Monique) 4. In ’77 and ’69 revolution was in the air. I was born too late to a world that doesn’t care. (I Wish I Were a Punk Rocker (With Flowers in My Hair) - Sandi Thom; guessed by Tony) 5. Now once I was downhearted, disappointment was my closest friend. But then you came and he soon departed and you know he never showed his face again. ((You Love Keeps Lifting Me) Higher and Higher - Jackie Wilson; guessed by Slaygal1981) 6. I know the territory, I’ve been around. It’ll all turn to dust and we’ll all fall down. Sooner or later you’ll be screwing around. (I'd Do Anything for Love (But I Won't Do That) - Meat Loaf; guessed by Tony) 7. In and out my life, you come and you go. Leaving just your picture behind and I've kissed it a thousand times. (I Can't Help Myself (Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch) - Four Tops; guessed by Slaygal1981) 8. There’s just an empty space and there’s nothing left here to remind me, just the memory of your face. (Against All Odds (Take a Look at Me Now) - Phil Collins; guessed by Tony) 9. Can we hit it like we did one more time, from the top? Can we hit like that one more time? One more time! Let's hit it and quit! Can we hit it and quit? (Get Up (I Feel Like Being A) Sex Machine - James Brown; guessed by Slaygal1981) 10. Hey Cinderella, step in your shoe. I’ll be your non-stop lover, get it while you can. Your non-stop miracle, I’m your man. (Get Outta My Dreams, Get into My Car - Billy Ocean; guessed by Tony) 11. Albert’s fallen on the sun, cracked his head wide open. The world begins to disappear, the worst things come from inside here, and all the king's men reappear. (Einstein on the Beach (For an Eggman) - Counting Crows; guessed by Tony) 12. Girl, all I know is every time you’re here I feel the change. Something moves, I scream your name. Look what you got me doing. (Can't Get Enough of Your Love, Babe - Barry White; guessed by Slaygal1981) 13. I’m not a shoulder to cry on, but I digress. (This Ain't a Scene, it's an Arms Race - Fall Out Boy; guessed by Tony) 14. I’ve done a lot of foolish things that I really didn't mean, didn't I? Seen a lot of things in this old world when I touch them, they mean nothing, girl. (Signed, Sealed, Delivered I'm Your - Stevie Wonder; guessed by Tony) 15. I got wasted, she got mad. Called me names then she called her dad. He got crazy and I did too, wondered what I did to you. (Anything, Anything (I'll Give You) - Dramarama; guessed by Tony) 16. Look into my eyes, you will see what you mean to me. Search your heart, search your soul and when you find me there you'll search no more. ((Everything I Do) I Do it for You - Bryan Adams; guessed by Doug) 17. I promised I would never leave you and you should always know wherever you may go, no matter where you are I never will be far away. (Lullabye (Goodnight, My Angel) - Billy Joel; guessed by Slaygal1981) 18. Yo we ‘bout to make you set speed. Peace to Baby Phife, Q-Tip, Ali Shaheed. Watch me knock you out like Apollo Creed. (Woo-Hah!! Got You All in Check - Busta Rhymes; guessed by Doug) 19. Just remember, you’re the one manl I can’t get enough of. So I’ll tell you something, this could be love. ((I've Had) The Time of My Life - Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes; guessed by Doug) 20. Right about now it's about that time for me to holler. Girl, I wanna waller in the back of my Impala. Woo; don't need no tickets for this thing. (C'mon N' Ride It (The Train) - Quad City DJ's; guessed by Doug) 21. Green light, 7-11. You stop in for a pack of cigarettes. You don’t smoke, don’t even want to. (Stay (Faraway, So Close!; guessed by Slaygal1981) 22. Right before my very eyes. I thought that you were only faking it and right before my heart was taking it. (Baby, What a Big Surpise - Chicago; guessed by Slaygal1981) 23. Well here we go again; you've found yourself a friend that knows you well. But no matter what you do, it always feels as though you tripped and fell. (Steady, As She Goes - The Raconteurs; guessed by Slaygal1981) 24. Baby, baby it looks like it’s gonna hail. Baby, baby it looks like it’s gonna hail. You better come inside. (Jump, Jive, an' Wail - Louis Prima; guessed by Slaygal1981) 25. I had a dream, I had an awesome dream. People in the park playing games in the dark. (Say You, Say Me - Lionel Richie; guessed by Monique)
Bonus: Do you love me question mark. Please, please exclamation point. I want to hold you in parentheses. (I Love You Period - Dan Baird; guessed by Tony)
Quote of the Week: Like in Blackjack. She’s a 15 so you’re not sure whether you’d hit that. (Barney - How I Met Your Mother)
Song of the Week: Devil Town - Tony Lucca (Friday Night Lights)
Big News of the Week: NBC orders Six More Friday Night Lights Scripts: Hopefully this is a precursor for a full order for next season. Or maybe it is just a formality and the higher ups at NBC just want to see what is coming next: will next season start on right after the state championship and follow the players in the off season or will we fast forward straight to the start of the next football season (which would be right around the time for the Taylor’s will be adding a family member)?
How I Met Your Mother: This season, they are really trying their best to ruin Barney. And by ruin I mean humanize. The episode was rolling along to be another great episode until they had to go and tell us that it was Barney that got Lily to come back home. And for those keeping track at home, future Ted has no problem telling his kids about stripper and self pleasuring devises. Um, yeah. I guess that is better than the multiple times he has told them about having sex with women that are not their mother. Check out the latest episode on Innertube.
Friday Night Lights: A decent ending to a stellar first season. Yeah the come from behind victory was improbable and it is doubtful that the cheerleaders would have to provide their own transportation to state, but it did lead to the great Landry Express scenes. And with their I hate guys bonding scenes, could we expect a Tyra and Lyla hookup next season? Yet another reason to renew this show.
And just a little bit on the Song of the Week, usually I add a link to iTunes where you can download the song, but not only is Tony Lucca’s Devil Town not on iTunes, I couldn’t find it anywhere on any of the internets. Anyone who can help a brother out, shout me a holla. Until then, like me, you can check out Bright Eyes version of the song as well as the original Daniel Johnston version to tide you over. Check out the latest episode over at NBC.com.
Lost: The big shock this week wasn’t that Juliet is still in cahoots with The Others as it was quite suspicious last week when she was so confident that the security system wasn’t running. No, the big shock was that Lost actually let us in on this as they wait to make a big reveal long after people stopped caring about it. I was fully expecting for the show to wait until the finale where there was a showdown with The Others with Jack having Not-Henry cornered, about to put in the final blow only for Juliet to come out of nowhere and nail Jack in the back with a steel chair, rip off her shirt to show she had an “I (Heart) Not-Henry” shirt underneath.
And now for my way out there theory of the week: The Others’ end game is to create a utopian society with only “good people” but the thing that keeps them from getting sick is what is rejecting fetuses in pregnant women. Check out the latest episodes over at ABC.com.
Survivor: It was a great twist by making the losing team go straight to tribal council without a chance to strategize. Not so great was when Probst didn’t make Alex man up and pick a reason to vote off his tribemates leading to the token hot chick getting voted off. Check out the latest episode on Innertube.
Promo of the Week: Only two and a half weeks until the return of Veronica Mars and the first episode back looks like it will have a semi-big name star making an appearance. If you avoid casting spoilers you may want to not watch it but he doesn’t reveal anything about his character or plot:
Pick of the Week: My Name Is Earl, Thursday 8:00, NBC: Many of you out there may think My Name Is Earl is hilarious but how could they possibly make it any funnier. Well it can with two words, Norm Frakking MacDonald.
![Terror Alert Level: Elevated [YELLOW]](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6-iVFV0hXCTSYP16K_V0Rrxp3GqFrtBIJKeTUyQ2LpxZQ9XKHFj6QGtqqa7oxhLadLV8vUj8R84AftD8IKUSfN0u_u0CYDtJwhrpCPN2DBWquAIDv0jbVlhZL0mDFKlPKluGyxw/s400/small_elevated.png)
on my 
![Terror Alert Level: High [ORANGE]](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhebDZ0qqwOVKMZj7oFSUe8Hm3ax54U9Hp1fThJPgiddTyzcdwx_5SV6E3b7hkKyxbaDiym4COmUXT2YJnsKCUjBHI_a2xZtNoY7qFQRslP5AGO5gLkJwn2ZbO0wIF80ycbKrgPPA/s400/small_high.png)
on my 
![Terror Alert Level: Guarded [BLUE]](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzCbHfExiuXqojow1zxkBUX6j-9BHg9IyrfzqR77jnja2Xq6dbv-7iiqMFzp_UKXGcUF9FyAHqCkNxa5uitXa5Xu2Q1OboN9-TLjsaeI1a2eoGLORU4vkTQ54l1C-_cZyn81QHyQ/s400/small_guarded.png)
on my 
