Best of the Week - 10/27/12

Quote of the Week: I’ll tell you what doesn’t count: the Miami Heat’s most recent NBA championship. It was an injury-plagued, strike-shortened season. Therefore LeBron still needs six rings to even get into a conversation with Jordan. Also Chris Bosh looks like one of Omar’s boyfriends from The Wire. (Jane, Happy Endings)

Song of the Week: Dust In the Wind – Kansas (as sung by Ryan and Steven, Go On)

Scene of the Week:


Big News of the Week: Fish Slapped!: Forget bayonets, God sanctioned rapes or how John Sununu is racist simple and plain (mutherfrack him and John Wayne), the most important thing that happened this week were all the people that got slapped by a fish. On Tuesday The Black Keys and RZA released a music video to see who is The Baddest Man Alive, the Keys may have some mad lettuce tossing skills, but RZA clearly was after slapping Dan Auerbach in the head with a fish. And just when you thought you had your quota of fish slapping this week, the very next day it showed up on The Challenge where, after a couple rounds of truly bizarre events, TJ Lavin saved the best event for last when two people had to joust each other, but instead a padded lance, they had to knock each other using nothing but a fish. Awesome. Let’s face it, the last presidential debate would have been much more interesting is instead of fighting over bayonets, the two candidates fought with fish.


Preview Picture of the Week:


Free Download of the Week: Fall Sampler – Dr. Dog (Noise Trade)

Deal of the Week: Every Norah Jones Album for $5.00

New Album Release of the Week: Cee Lo's Magic Moment - Cee-Lo Green

New DVD Release of the Week: Chuck: The Complete Series - Collector Set

Video of the Week: I loved Army of Darkness and quickly also picked up the first two Evil Dead movies (sure it is a bit weird to watch the third movie first), but like every reboot, I really had no desire for a reimagining of the film. On the bright side, both Sam Raimi and Bruce Campbell are signed on for the reboot. On the other side, Sam is not directing and Bruce is not acting in it (unless when he said he was going to show up as the milkman was not a joke). Now we have the first look at the movie and holy crap it is scary. It even gives plenty of throwbacks to the original: point of view evil running through the wood, the Necronomicon, self arm amputation, a chainsaw, tree rape. They even throw in a new tongue cutting scene for fun. I am still on the fence for an Evil Dead reboot, but I am kind of excited for the thought that this could lead to a potential Tessa Altman vs. the Army of Darkness movie.


Next Week Pick of the Week: The Voice, Monday and Tuesday at 8:00 on NBC: Big changes on The Voice this season as they expanded the teams from twelve to sixteen (twice as many as the first season) which meant adding another obstacle to the Lice Shows: The Knockout Round. Like moths rules on The Voice little was about the Knockout Rounds but from the look at the promo it looks eerily similar to the Battle Rounds except instead of the coach picking a song the two sing together, two contestants will sing songs of their own choosing (that can be cleared) with one being declared the winner with five from each moving on to the Live Shows. The Knockout Rounds will all air over two nights (Tuesday is being expanded to two hours), and with forty performances scheduled, I am expecting a lot of montage advances considering they only crammed three battles or five auditions per hour previously. I doubt they will cram in ten full performances per hour in the knockouts because they will still have to set aside some time to remind us that MacKenzie almost died and Adriana was part of a home invasion. If I were a betting man these are the people I would put money on advancing to the Live Shows (please note these are not the people I think should advance; you can wait until Monday’s Power Ranking to see who I think should):

Team Adam: Bryan Keith, Melanie Martinez, Nicole Nelson, Joselyn Rivera, Kayla Nevarez
Team Blake: Cassadee Pope, Terry McDermott, Suzanna Choffel, Gracia Harrison, and Liz Davis
Team Cee-Lo: Trevin Hunte, Avery Wilson, MacKenzie Bourge, Nicholas David, Caitlin Michelle
Team Chritina: Adriana Louis, Devyn Deloera, De’Borah, Aquile, Dez Duron

Around the Tube - 10/26/12

I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on Mockingbird Lane, Total Blackout, Dead Prez, Homeland, 60 Minutes Sports, Mannheim Streamroller, Outlaw Brothers, Randy Rhoads, Eric Burdon, Annoying Orange, House Hunters, and Supernatural.

- The Mockingbird Lane special airs tonight on NBC at 8:00 and you can take a sneak peak below:


- Total Blackout returns Tuesday at 10:00 on Syfy and here is a sneak peak of the season premiere:


- You may remember Dead Prez from their seminal rap song Hip-Hop (if you do not, look it up), and the duo is back with Information Age which they just released digitally. For those who still buy CD’s, it will be released in physical form January 23, 2013

- Fresh off its highest rated episode ever, Showtime has ordered up a third season of Homeland. In other Showtime news, Armen Keteyian has been named full-time correspondent for 60 Minutes Sports, the new shorts show which is coming sometime in 2013.

- The holidays are right around the corner so it is time for Mannheim Steamroller to awake from its yearly slumber (just what exactly do they do between January and November?). This year they will have some help spreading holiday cheer when Smash star Megan Hilty will join the band for NBC’s special Pandora Unforgettable Holiday Moments on Ice which will air Thanksgiving weekend on November 25 starting at 4:00.

- Out on DVD this week, Outlaw Brothers directed by Frankie Chan and featuring action direction from martial arts legend Jackie Chan this action-packed film follows the exploits of two car thieves, and the butt-kicking female police officer who is on their trail.


- For those wondering what to get the metal head on your Christmas list, the 400 page Randy Rhoads coffee table book is out now.

- Record Store Day is going to coincide with Black Friday this year and Eric Burdon will be contributing a four song EP on 180 gram vinyl. The album will be released digitally November 27 and you can stream it already on soundcloud.

- The Annoying Orange is getting into politics with Broccoli Obama and Pit Romney. No, seriously. Take a look below:


- House Hunting can be hard, but when you can get a vacation for doing it makes it easier. HGTV’s House Hunters just launched a Facebook page where fans can download the experience by “liking” HGTVHouseHunters Facebook page to earn coveted passport stamps and win great prizes, including the chance for one lucky viewer to win a global adventure – a 12-Day Mediterranean cruise from Barcelona to Venice with stops in some of the world’s greatest cities: Provence, France; Italy’s Rome, Florence and Pisa; Istanbul, Turkey; Athens and Mykonos, Greece.

- Just in time for Halloween, TNT will be airing 24 hours of Supernatural starting tomorrow at noon.

I Could Take the Pitchfork from the Devil

If there has been one word of wisdom I have given in my life is that you never, under any circumstance, trust a big butt and a smile. If there was a second piece of advice that I take to heart it would be that The Wu-Tang Clan ain’t nunthin’ to (expletive deleted) with. It has been five years since we last got a Wu-Tang album and it does not look like we will get another one for a while so The Man With the Iron Fists may be the closest thing we get anytime soon. The soundtrack to the RZA written, directed, and starring film features nine tracks with a Wu member on it but only two credited to the Wu-Tang Clan as a whole.

RZA, who is never confused as the best lyricist in the group does show up on the best track on the soundtrack when he teams up with The Black Keys (this may be the closest thing we will get to Blakroc 2 any time soon too) where he tryes to out boast Dan Aurbach throughout the song. Dan may grab a crocodile by the tail, but RZA will take a gasoline bath then walk through fire. And just image how much better Once Upon a Time, Season 2 - Once Upon a Time would be if it featured RZA date-rape Beauty right in front of the Beast. (I should note that I in no way condone any form of date rape and any rapist should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law, but if there were an exception, it would involve a member of the Wu-Tang Clan and a fictional character).

On the flipside, Ghostface Killah does show why he is one of the Clan’s best rappers when he teams up with M.O.P. and Pharoahe Monch on Black Out, a song so old school great, it will make you accost a teenager with a Meek Mills shirt about tales of real hip-hop back in the day. Of the two tracks here credited to the whole Clan, Rivers of Blood with Raekwon, Ghostface Killah, and U-God with an appearance by Kool G Rap is the better one with its great horn and kung-fu samples (which of course fits in well with the movie). And Built for This with Method Man, Freddie Biggs, and Streetlife is pure menacing.

Where most of the Clan member bring their A-games to their respective tracks (or as close to an A game as U-God can get), the Kanye West track White Dress sounds like a My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy leftover that was not even good enough to put out during G.O.O.D. Fridays. It does not help that the song could be about a Kardasian. Kanye’s buddy Pusha T has a much better show micing it up with Raekwon, Joell Ortiz, and the always weird Danny Brown on Tick Tock which thankfully does not mention Ke$ha at all. If the trailer for The Man with the Iron Fists did not get you pumped enough for the movie, the soundtrack certainly will.

Song to Download – The Baddest Man Alive

The Man with the Iron Fists gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

I Want My Music Television - 10/24/12

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.

The Baddest Man Alive – The Black Keys and RZA


The Black Keys! RZA!! The Baddest Man Alive!!! Dan gets fish slapped!!!!


Girl on Fire – Alicia Keys


Alicia Keys is back and thankfully without Nicki Minaj who ruined the song at the Video Music Awards. Although I was hoping for a video for the Bluelight Version of the song which was my favorite of the three versions that Alicia released for the song.


I’m Shakin’ – Jack White


For the unaware, Jack Black recorded his first solo album with two bands, an all guy one and an all girl one and here they are going head to head. I have to say I prefer the blue Jack White.


Hurts Like Heaven - Coldplay


It is weird that Cpldplay are launching a comic book based on their album over a year after it was released. But then again, maybe it will ended up being optioned as a big budget motion picture. It is no less plausible than a talking alien raccoon. Plus I have to admit, Major Minus is an awesome name for a arch-nemesis and the bad guys are usually more interesting than the comic book heroes anyway.

I Hope Whoever Broke Your Heart Actually Got to Hear That

The last season of Switched at Birth ended with everybody learn that Emmitt and Simone had some extracurricular activities after a basketball game. It was made more awkward that each of them were dating a brother and sister combo. Naturally that blew up the current season, Toby moved on while Simone turned to alcohol. While Emmitt tried to get Bay back even though she did everything to reject him short of blaring Taylor Swift songs at him.

Granted there may still be hope for Emmitt because Bay did not run into the arms of another guy (aside from a brief tryst on a vacation), instead she ran into the arms of Ben Linus’s daughter of all people. It was the latest in a string of Bay acting act by joining a street art collective, which, like every of Bay’s adventures, ended badly. But at least it ended badly in a hilarious way especially dudes in Michael Myers masks. Although when the saga was all over, it looked like Bay mat not be playing We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together much longer.

At one point Daphne was ready to fight Bay for Emmitt but ended up with Wilke, but with him off in military school (how dare you Corbin Bernsen) she moved on to her douchebag of her boss. And just when you think it could not get any creepier, it turns out he previously dated Emmitt’s mother. Ewww. And then the season finale started out with Daphne getting birth control. Double ewww. It did lead to an Oh snap moment where mother and daughter went after each other in the bathroom where Daphne did the old tried and true I “leaned it from watching from you” defense, but instead of drugs, it was dating inappropriate men. Awesome. But not as awesome as Angelo punching Chef Jeff which may have been the weakest fake punch in the history of television.

Then the big shocker came at then end, both parents won their court case, but the Kennishs only got a dollar while Angelo got five million dollar. Wow, someone please switch my kid. Which made me wonder of Regina and Angelo would be staying at the Kennishs next season. If so, the rent will be going way up. Oh wait there was one more twist; a very pregnant woman gave looking for Angelo right after the verdict. Now I am not saying this woman is a golddigger, but…

Switched at Birth vol. 3 gets a on my Terror Alert Scale. You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Switched At Birth on iTunes..

Will Obama's America Offer Real Solutions or More Slogans

In a measure of full disclosure I should first say I am a registered Republican. I did not vote for Barack Obama four years ago and do not plan to vote for him in two weeks. Although I really do not go around announcing my conservatism much lately because my party has become a party of nutjobs who spout the most unbelievable things like our president was not born in this country and is a Muslim (even though four years ago he was anti-American because his Christian minister once said negative things about this country). 2016: Obama's America is supposed to be the thinking man’s attack on the president. There are no accusations of being a Muslim or even being born in Kenya or even hints at them (it even points out two separate newspapers in Hawaii that announced Obama’s birth).

The movie is based on the book by Dinesh D’Souza, The Roots of Obama's Rage which he wrote in 2010. The tagline claims, “Love him, hate him… you don’t know him”. Except after watching the movie, there really was not much of the movie that I found new. There was one guy that Dinesh called one of Obama’s “founding fathers” (along with people like the 2008 buzz person Bill Ayers) who was a registered communist. Except like all the other “founding fathers” (aside from Reverend Wright) there are no pictures of Barry with any of these people (even the liberal communist were able to find one picture of George Bush with Jack Abramoff). If he was so close to these people to the point they shape his policy, why is he never pictured with them. And Dinesh sure likes his pictures because the one of Barry smoking (something) is shown multiple times.

Even in the film, D’Souza features a cable show where he tells some talking head that accusing Obama as a Muslim and a socialist have not worked, so he has moved to attack number three: Barack Obama is anti-imperialist. Who knew there were imperialists left to be anti to? (Ironically the day after I watch this movie, I read an article by conservative commentator Niall Ferguson reporting a story where Chinese nationalist surrounded the US ambassador to the nation chanting “Down with US imperialism!).

Why is Barack Obama an anti-imperialist? Because his father was Kenyan and Barack wants to continue the Mau Mau uprising that kicked out imperialist British Army. To all of the even keel thinkers out there that are wondering, “You mean that Barry, who was raised by two Kansas women, was influenced by a man that abandoned him and only met once in his life?” And before you suggest that abandoned sons usually distance themselves from their absentee father, Dinesh finds a psychologist who specializes abandonment where the two men, who never met Barack Obama theorize that he is the an exception to the rule. Keep in mind earlier in the film Dinesh theorizes what would have happened had he stayed in his native India where he thinks he would have had been in an arrange marriage and the like, yet Barack, growing up in America, still ended up like his Kenyan father that he barely knew.

The first anti-imperialist argument that D’Souza is that the first thing Obama did after being inaugurated was to return a bust of Winston Churchill that the White House had since the 60’s to England. Except the reality is that the bust from the 60’s is still there, and the bust that was returned was loaned (note loaned, not permanently given to) to George W. Bush after 9/11 and was cleared out of the Oval Office with all of the other art and furniture that Bush put in there during his two terms. Obama’s supposed anti- British streak continued when D’Souza says that Obama supports Argentina gaining control of the Falkland Island but when I did a simple Google search most articles I read said that Obama is neutral on the issue.

After an hour of Obama history, D’Souza finally gets to theorizing what 2016 will look like if we reelect the anti-imperialist Obama which includes a world where Obama gets rid of all of our nuclear weapons because he is on the record of wishing we could live in a world without nuclear weapons (confessed Reaganite Dinesh conveniently omits that Ronald Reagan said the exact same thing). He also theorizes that because of Obama’s foreign policy that in four years we may see “The United States of Islam” that would stretch from Morocco to Pakistan (surprisingly his map leaves out Obama’s ancestral home of Kenya) even though many of the countries in Islam Fantasyland hate each other as much as they hate us.

The only potential doomsday scenario that Dinesh exposes that I agree with is that our debt will bring down the country, though I disagree that Obama wants it to happen because of his anti-imperialism. But this is not a Barack Obama problem; both Democrats and Republican have a spending problem that they need to reign in. One of the commentators that D’Souza speaks to even dings George W. Bush for his overspending. Granted Dinesh does conveniently omit in his stat that Americans have lost a large percentage of their wealth since 2006 that two of those years were under Bush.

Politics aside, 2016: Obama’s America just looks just a step above student film with hilariously staged dramatization and bizarre sound choices. While talking about a debate he had with Jesse Jackson, the dramatization actually depicts a black dude walking into what looks like a biker bar where the white patrons give the black dude a birthday cake. But still is not as funny as Dinesh doing the hula while researching Obama’s past. And it was were in a taped phone conversation, which looked more staged than one on The Hills, the sound would inexplicably change depending if the camera was on Dinesh or the person he was talking to.

When it comes down to it, 2016: Obama’s America will only make the people who already have an irrational hated of Barack Obama crazier and will make Obama supporters laugh more than they did for this week’s episode Modern Family. While people in the middle will not bother to watch it unless their crazy uncle forces them to. Just take the movie as it is, just something Dinesh D’Souza put out to make money. Actually, Dinesh may have changed my vote, I had no intentions of voting for Obama, but now I kind of want to see how wrong his movie is. And since I live in Ohio, my vote may very well decide the election.


Full Discourse Notice: This DVD was given to me by Lionsgate for review.

57 Channels and Only This Is On - 10/21/12

Once Upon a Time: I am still wondering just where did Regina’s mother go when she got pushed through the mirror. Are we going to get some sort of flashback? I guess I probably should stop caring because I doubt it really matters, there are the “writers from Lost”.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Revenge: I really cannot say I care for the new player all that much. I kind of wish he had just been crushed by the trash compactor. But I do wonder where they are going with Rebecca Logan because she clearly has a crush on the gay Nolan. Maybe he has a fluid sexuality or more likely she is going to go Fatal Attraction on him because Nolan does have a penchant for being tied up.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

The Walking Dead: Welcome back The Walking Dead and goodbye Hershel’s leg. Such a graphic ending I will forgive that apparently the group has be wondering in circles the last couple months even though the prison was less than a mile away from them in last season’s finale or that they did not just kill all the zombies via chain link fence instead of wasting their low stock of bullets.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

The Voice: Just last week I commented how surprisingly the coaches picked the right singer almost every battle. Well that only lasted a week because I disagreed with half of their decisions this week. Personally I would have gone with Terisa Griffin, Paulina, Benji, Lelia Broussard, Joselyn Rivera, Alessandra Guercio, and Emily Earle over who ended up losing to. Granted thanks to the save, three of them are sticking around. Except the save went to the wrong three people. It is befuddling to me that Joselyn, Terisa, and Alessandra are sticking around but Lelia, Benji, and Emily are all going home. I was a big proponent of the steal but four of the six steals have so far left me scratching my head (Collin McLoughlin being the other).

Aside from the newly instituted steal, really the only reason to watch the Battle Rounds is for the truly bizarre pairings. Last week it was Domo vs. Cody Belew and this week it was Julio Cesar Castillo vs. Terisa. (I am severely disappointed that we did not get to see the Beat Frequency battle because that had the highest trainwreck potential) And it certainly did not disappoint from the awesomely bad stand point. Just when you think it the pairing could not get weirder, Blake goes ahead and has them sing the rapid fire song Congo by Gloria Estefan, which, as Michael Buble correctly points out, is a song that no one knows the words to thirty years later. It was only made better by Blake picking the wrong person.

Speaking of poor choices, Cee-Lo picking MacKenzie Bourg over Emily was the worst decision since he picked Erin Martin over Shields Brothers. He was painfully bad. Everything Adam and Blake said were right (and the only positive things Christina bothered to say were visually not vocally which probably meant she did not like what she heard either) and Emily should have won easily. Though Emily does deserve a slither of blame. The best part of the song is when Carly Rae Jepsen goes "Whoo!" and Emily did not do the "Whooo!" Not singing “Whoooo” in Good Time is like not having the crunching guitar during Creep.

I really hope MacKenzie gets eliminated before the live shows or he could be this year's Pip, which would make Dez Duron this year's James Massone, two cute boys who were so bad, the producers had to create some lame rule last season to get rid of them so teen girls could not turn The Voice into the joke that American Idol is.

On a side note, did Billy Joe Armstrong seriously quote Spiderman (by way of Voltaire) in a battle between two bland teenage female pop singers? Again, I feel cheated that we did not get to hear any advice Billie exposed on Beat Frequency.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs from The Voice with the widget at right.

Sons of Anarchy: I am not sure if it is poetic or creepy that the creator of the show told one of the actresses on his show to get on her knees. Maybe both. But definitely creepy that he had his wife go down on another dude while that dude’s fake half sister watched.
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Philippines: I found it weird that they lingered on Probst snuffing Dawson’s torch, which only made weirder when she went and have him a hug and kiss. And how apropos that someone had to be medically evacuated on the season where three previous one returned. I wonder if Dana was faking in hopes of returning the next time they do it.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download Survivor: Philippines on iTunes.

Subugatory: The show is the funniest on television but the one misstep it takes is the crappy title sequence. Well at least I now that the title is the fault of Tessa’s mother.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Suburgatory on iTunes.

The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons: Not only this week TJ’s favorite, but trivia week is mine too. And it did not disappoint. Just when you think no one would top answering “Europe” for a which country question, some actually answered “23” when asked how many continents the show has been to. Quality entertainment. But I wish there had been less Challenge trivia and more spelling. And you have to start easier than “Narcissistic” (in Chet’s defence, I needed spell check to write the word).
You can download The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: The biggest disappointment of the ever expanding cast (Stuart was even promoted to full time this season) is there seems to be less and less Penny and Sheldon moments which is what made the first couple seasons great. It seems the last couple seasons their interactions are secondhand. This week’s episode just showed they need to force these two together more often. Penny pinning, then kissing Sheldon is one of the top five moments of the duo in the series, maybe even third after soft kitty and the time Penny broke her arm.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.