So let me get this straight, next season instead of Veronica Mars, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, or Let’s Rob Ray Ramono, we get Farmer Wants a Wife, another The Bionic Woman, and Cavemen. Seriously? I guess I should thank the networks for sucking because it looks like I will be watching a lot less television next year. Here are the few shows I will be watching next year:
Monday 8:00 - How I Met Your Mother (CBS) 8:30 - Everybody Hates Chris on tape (CW) 9:00 - Heroes (NBC)
Tuesday Um…
Wednesday Moving on…
Thursday 8:00 - Survivor (CBS) 9:00 - Smallville on tape (CW) 10:00 - My Name Is Earl on tape (NBC)
Friday 10:00 - Friday Night Lights (NBC)
Saturday Nope…
Sunday Maybe VH1 will have some good Celebreality
Wow, five and a half of network television next year. Again network television, thanks for sucking. That may go down to two and a half if that actually killed Lana and Chloe off Smallville (more on that later) and I finally give up on Heroes.
Now this is usually where I give my preseason top five but I can’t even find one new show that I even have the littlest interest in aside from Big Bang Theory where I have a very small interest if only because Kaley Cuoco is what I like to refer as uber-hot. But even her as the eye candy wasn’t enough for me to watch 7 Ideas that Shook Your Momma (or whatever that show was called) and really how funny can a show from the co-creator of Two and a Half Men be? And this preview is not doing much to wet my appetite, well, actually it is, but not in a way that it will make me want to tune in every week:
So I doubt I’d make it to the second episode. But then again I guess it is a good thing I didn’t make a preseason list because look at last year’s list:
1. Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip (NBC) 2. Let’s Rob (ABC) 3. Heroes (NBC) 4. 20 Good Years (NBC) 5. The Nine (ABC)
Yeah, all but one got canceled while the one remaining show, although it had flashes of how good it could have been, was brought down by poor writing and even worse acting. Well here’s to a hopefully brighter 2008-2009 season.
When there is no arcing mystery, be it season long or part of a season, there just seems to be less to talk about without dissecting every scene, trying to figure out what are clues and what are red herrings and then break down who you think the perp is this week. With that said, the show has filled the time with some hot button topics, two weeks ago they talked terrorism, and this week it is genocide in Africa, insert Paul Rudd in-between and you have some solid episode.
Unfortunately taking the place of the overarching mysteries we get boring character driven storylines like with Mac and Max, they were much more interesting during the courting phase, as well as the Logan/Parker part. It was a little humorous the scene with Parker’s parents where they asked him his plans which called back the dinner he had with Keith earlier this season and was a nice tie in to Keith telling Ronnie that it was nice she had a boyfriend who cared more about things that how high the tide was.
Which is a nice transition to the great relationship, Ronnie and her dad arguing over who would get and did get on there PI test continues to show there are the best father-daughter combination on television. Then there is the shocking family time with Big Dick coming back to Neptune to turn himself in. Holy frak! When Little Dick walked onto the screen I got a big grin expecting another classic Dickism but I never expected a Dick Sr. would return. And who knew Ryan Hansen could act.
The return may have not been as shocking it is always good to see Cliff again who had one of the best lines of the night, “I hope you’ll understand why you won’t have my vote in the upcoming election.” And just like I mentioned last week, it looks Vinnie Van Lowe is conspiring with the Fitpatricks to be their patsy, and of course Neptune would be a much more entertaining place with him in charge of the police.
As for the story of the week, it was very well down and it is always a nice change of pace when someone out smarts Ronnie like Apollo did to use Vee to see if the father was after his money or not. And don’t forget to check out the website that was mention at the end of the episode, invisiblechildren.com, to see what you can do to help children in war torn Africa countries from becoming child soldiers or having to live in horrible conditions in displacement camps.
After over two years writing this blog I get a sense that my readers fall into one of two catergories, those that come to read about the latest music and those that want to see my thought on television (for those that fall in the latter catergory, be sure to check out my Win a Copy of Neptune Noir Contest). Well here is a post for the both of you: a lyrics quiz dedicated to songs features on television shows during the 2006-2007 season. As usual, place your guesses in the comment, both artist and song title, and if you are correct I will un-bold the lyric. You can also get a bonus point is you correctly guess which show(s) the song was featured on and double bonus points if you correctly guess the character how sang the song on the show if it was not performed by the original artist (you can steal the bonus point if and only if someone correctly guesses the lyrics). Now since I don’t watch every show on television and there are plenty of unoriginal shows out there that copy other show’s musical taste, I will only accept quality television shows, and I am the one who decides whether a show is quality. But as a hint, if dudes sang a karaoke version of the song or the song was featured in a montage at the end of a teen or medical drama because the writers were to lazy to write a couple more pages of dialogue, there is a good chance I won’t accept it. Now onto the lyrics (as a not so helpful hint, the songs are arranged by with the best song placements first, that is not to be confused with the best songs though):
Hints: (Some of these songs were Song of the Week on my weekly 57 Channels and Only This Is On posts) 3. This song was sung by one of the castmembers in a different launguage. 7. Will accept more bonus. 8. Who knew the dude from Clueless could sing?
1. And I want you, and I feel you crawling underneath my skin, like a hunger. (What's Left of Me - Nick Lashey; guessed by Slaygal1981; Bonus - Veronica Mars; guessed by Jules) 2. All my friends were vampires. I didn’t know they were vampires. (Devil Town - Daniel Johnston; guessed by Slaygal1981; Bonus - Friday Night Lights; guessed by Jules) 3. My son turned ten just the other day. He said, “Thanks for the ball, dad, come on let’s play.” (Cats in the Cradle - Harry Chapin; guessed by Monique; Bonus - Knights of Prosperity; guesed by Slaygal1981) 4. Though this feeling I can't change. Please don't take it badly, the Lord knows I'm to blame. (Free Bird - Lynyrd Skynrd; Bonus - My Name Is Earl; both guessed by Slaygal1981) 5. And when the money, comes in for the work I do I’ll pass almost every penny on to you. (I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles) - The Proclaimers; Bonus - How I Met Your Mother; both guessed by Slaygal1981) 6. Gonna close my eyes, girl, and watch you go. Running through this life darling like a field of snow. (The One I Love - David Gray; Bonus - Rescue Me; both guessed by Slaygal1981) 7. I can’t care ‘bout anything but you. (Lovefool - The Cardigans; Bonus - The Office; both guessed by Slaygal1981) 8. I’m the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral. Can’t understand what I mean? Well, you soon will. (One Week - Barenaked Ladies; Bonus - Veronica Mars; both guessed by Slaygal1981) 9. Can't we give ourselves one more chance? Why can't we give love, ‘cos love's such an old fashioned word? (Under Pressure - Queen and David Bowie; Bonus - Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip; both guessed by Slaygal1981) 10. Cracks a code on the Rosetta Stone. Said the word for alone is alone. (My Before and After - Cotton Mather; Bonus Veronica Mars as sung by Desmond Fellows; Both guessed by Slaygal1981) 11. All the lights that lead us there are blinding. (Wonderwall - Oasis; guessed by Jo; Bonus: Lost as sung by Charlie; guessed by Slaygal1981) 12. I’ve got a cow that went dry and a hen that won’t lay. A big stack of bills that get bigger each day. (Busted - Johnny Cash; Bonus - Veronica Mars; both guessed by Slaygal1981) 13. Just the good ol’ boys, never meaning no harm. (Theme from Dukes of Hazzard Theme - Waylon Jennings; Bonus - My Name Is Earl; both guessed by Slaygal1981) 14. Check baby check baby 1, 2, 3, 4. (Rump Shaker - Wreckx-N-Effect; guessed by Doug; Bonus - Lost and Veronica Mars; guessed by Slaygal1981) 15. I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom. (The Humpty Dance - Digital Underground; guessed by Slaygal1981; Bonus - My Name Is Earl; guessed by Slaygal1981) 16. Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance, silver moon’s sparkling. (Kiss Me - Sixpence None the Richer; guessed by Slaygal1981; Bonus - Knights of Prosperity; guesed by Slaygal1981) 17. One pair of candy lips and your bubblegum tongue. (Your Body Is a Wonderland - John Mayer; Bonus - The Office; both guessed by Slaygal1981) 18. It’s time to bring this ship into the shore, and throw away the oars, forever. (Can't Fight This Feeling - REO Speedwagon; guessed by Monique; Bonus - Supernatural; guessed by Jules) 19. They’re watching you watching you watching you watching you. (Private Eyes - Hall and Oates; guessed by Monique; Bonus - Knights of Prosperity; guessed by Slaygal1981) 20. Smack it up, flip it, rub it down. (Do Me! - Bell Bive DeVoe; guessed by Slaygal1981; Bonus - My Name Is Earl; guessed by Slaygal1981) 21. The stars are blazing like rebel diamonds cut out of the sun. (Read My Mind - The Killers; guessed by Slaygal1981; Bonus - Friday Night Lights; guessed by Slaygal1981) 22. And by protecting my heart truly I got lost in the sounds. (Fidelity - Regina Spektor; guessed by Monique; Bonus - Veronica Mars; guessed by Slaygal1981) 23. See the west wind move like a lover so upon the fields of barley. (Fields of Gold - Sting; Bonus guessed by Slaygal1981) 24. Hands, touching hands. Reaching out, touching me, touching you. (Sweet Caroline - Neil Diamond; guessed by Jo; Bonus - Veronica Mars; guessed by Doug) 25. It’s not a silly little moment, it’s not the calm before the storm. (Slow Dancing in a Buring Room - John Mayer; Bonus - CSI; both guessed by Slaygal1981)
Bonus: A list of the best song placements on television would be incomplete without this song but it is hard to use the song in a lyrics quiz because the only words to the song are the ones in the title. So as a bonus (double points for each), name the song, the artist, and the show that I am speaking of. (Right Here, Right Now - Fatboy Slim; Bonus - Veronica Mars; both guessed by Slaygal1981)
Honorable Mention to Bad Day - Daniel Powder as sung by Veronica Mars which happened after I made this list.
In my adult life, I can count on one hand the amount of books I have read. In fact I could have lost a couple in shop class and still be able to count them. (Before you write me off as having an aversion to reading, I do subscribe to two magazines, Newsweek and Rolling Stone.) And those few I read took me literally years to finish. But when the good people over at BenBella Books sent me a copy of Neptune Noir: Unauthorized Investigation into Veronica Mars, I went threw all 212 pages within a week.
The book is a collection of eighteen essays, most seemingly written between the second and third seasons, dissecting every aspect of the show and no matter why it is you watch the show, whether it be for the noir, the girl power, or the Veronica/Logan relationship, there is an essay for you. Well unless you are like me and watch the show for the latest Dickisms as only survivor still left in Neptune only gets fleeting mentions. And oddly a whole essay is devoted to the cars of Veronica Mars and what they tell you about the show and the characters that drive them, but no one devolves fully into Ronnie’s love life instead the writers side with Logan or Duncan with Troy and Deputy Leo left as footnotes.
The book starts of with an introduction from the show’s creator, Rob Thomas, which even at seven pages makes the book worth the price of admission as he recounts his professional life between moving out to Los Angeles up to the point of Veronica Mars getting picked up. Most interesting of this part was the pilot he wrote for Fox in-between Cupid and Veronica Mars, but of course since Fox is allergic to quality programming, they passed.
Thomas then also gives an introduction to each essay sometime discounting the essay in its entirety like the one about the cars (Full disclosure: I’m not a car guy) and seemed a little uneasy that someone devoted a whole essay about the campy side of the show (When something on Veronica Mars feels, campy, it means we have failed). The title of the review came from what Thomas said when the network asked what the show was about, but as anyone who has watched the show, it is much more as seen in the essays complied for the book. It would take too long to review each individual but here were the most interesting to me.
Chris McCubbin devoted his essay, The Duck and the Detective, on why Veronica Mars plays better in Red States than Blue. This piece stuck me as a resident of a Red State and life long Republican (well up until my brethren elected the most inept president ever, twice). My television schedule has never been influenced by my political beliefs, I even loved the unapologetically liberal Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, yet it still fascinated me especially after when a few liberals were up in arms because of the abortion pill episode. McCubbin liked to bring up the South Park republicans, but the big difference between South Park and Veronica Mars is that that Matt Stone has said, “I hate conservatives, but I really (expletive deleted) hate liberals” while Thomas readily admits, “he is “part of the Hollywood Loberal Media Elite.”
The other essay that caught my eye was the one from John Ramos, Couch Baron of Television Without Pity, I Cannot Tell a Lie. And if You Believe That… Ramos dissects the level of lies, from the white lies that help her solve a case to the big fat ones that have major consequences like when she played her father while helping Duncan get out of the country with his baby in tow. Add to that The New Normal by Kristen Kiddler where she looks into Vee’s vigilantism and it interesting to see people complain in season three that Ronnie has gotten so mean. The first season was all about making people pay, the person who killed Lily, the person who raped her and anyone who was an accomplice, even if inadvertent will be in her crosshairs. She still to this day harbors deep hatred for Madison Sinclair for handing her the drink that led to her rape.
Even though there is plenty of great essays for every type of Veronica Mars fan, there will be certainly a few that will not be as good as others depending on what brings you to the show. For me I could do without the essays on the cars as well as the one devoted to the “epic” love. But this is definitely a must read for anyone who has watched the show. You can order Neptune Noir: Unauthorized Investigation into Veronica Mars at the BenBella Books website. Also any television fan who is dreading the upcoming summer without your favorite shows should check out other books in their Smart Pop Anthology Series including books dedicated to Buffy the Vampire Slayer, The Simpsons, Gilmore Girls among others. And do not forget to check out my Win a Copy of Neptune Noir Contest.
Neptune Noir: Unauthorized Investigation into Veronica Mars gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.
Quote of the Week: Running from the law wasn’t as easy as they made it look on The Dukes of Hazard. (Joy - My Name Is Earl)
Song of the Week: My Before and After - Cotton Mather (as sung by Desmond Fellows, Veronica Mars)
Big News of the Week: Up Fronts: All the internet gossipers with their “sources” have been speculating for weeks what is in and what is out for the 2007-08 television season but all the rumor will be put to rest this week as all the networks unveils their schedules for next season. So everyone will know for sure if their favorite shows will be coming back and which nights. I’ll have my final wrap up Friday of what I’ll be watching as well as my preseason picks for best new shows.
Saturday Night Live: the 90’s: A thoroughly good retrospective of some of the best years in the history of the show. Some interesting stories including that the original cowbell skit failed in dress rehearsal earlier that season because it was Christopher Walken who made that skit, but I wonder who the original guest host was when the skit got cut. The early years were top heavy with the like of Sandler (who was conspicuously absent), Myers, Carvey, and Rock while the last half was carried by Norm MacDonald. Surprisingly they spent a decent amount of time on his firing. It is a shame the Burt Reynolds cross over didn’t happen because of it. Now it would be too easy to say the Celebrity Jeopardy was my favorite Norm scetch so here is my favorite on:
Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School: Mo’Nique is a moron. Seriously, she had a professional Speech and Debate dude their and she didn’t even respect his decision on who won. Not to mention it was obvious to me that the right team one. Download the latest episode on iTunes.
How I Met Your Mother: From my first impression, I called the show a televised version of a chick flick that is saved by the hilarity that is Barney, but not even Barney could save this week’s episode. Although the random dude, should I have known who that was, chasing Scooter (no relation) almost did. Check out the latest episode on Innertube.
Heroes: The whole snow-globe scene was cool, the rest of the episode, not so much. So we have Peter who knows that he is going to blow up th city, who instead of high tailing it out of the city to avoid that happening, instead goes in search of radioactive man, who is the very person that would cause him to blow up the season. And the show once again teases my greatest hope for the show, that Claire puts a bullet in the back of his head, killing him for good. Please let this be real this time. Check out the latest episode over at NBC.com.
Veronica Mars: Another reason to subscribe to the Veronica Mars Podcast; you learn little tidbits like Desmond Fellows dead band mate in the My Pretty Pony video was played by Rob Thomas. Also if you are a fan of the show, be sure to check out my Win a Copy of Neptune Noir Contest. Check out the latest episode over at CWTV.com or download over at iTunes.
Lost: I totally called Juliet pulling a swerve on the Other with Jack in on it. Now with that said let move to the bulk of the episode; what the frack was that? Not-Henry and Locke talking to a fracking invisible man? Are you fracking kidding me? The reason why eyepatch dude didn’t die was because the wattage apparently wasn’t high enough? That’s fracking lame. Future obscenities aside, I guess we learned a few thing this episode like Not-Henry was, in fact, not born on the island. Apparently The Hostiles don’t age, or at the very least the Hispanic one doesn’t. The Workman in the van was Not-Henry’s dad. But there were plenty of new questions like how did Not-Henry, an outsider to the group, become the leader of The Others? Why didn’t the Hostiles purge the people in the Pearl Station? Is the little girl dead? Is Locke really dead? The show must have one frack of a finale if it expects me, along with other viewers to wait eight months before the show starts up again. Check out the latest episodes over at ABC.com.
Survivor: Yau-Man may have made the best move in the history of Survivor. With six contestant left, he set into motion a plan that very well will put him into the top three. He used the immunity idol to get himself into the top five and if he or Earl gets immunity he’ll get into the top four where if he or Dreamz gets immunity he is automatically in the final (assuming there is a three person finale again). But it will all depend on if the jury rewards him for the plan or give the vote to someone else to spite him. Check out the latest episode on Innertube.
My Name Is Earl: Much better finale than last year with Earl hitting on Joy’s lawyer and the reveal that she was actually on his list and the shocking twist the Earl threw himself on the bomb went to jail for Joy. As great as the show is with Earl crossing things off his list, an Earl in jail so could be just as funny as long as Ralph signs onto the show full time. But I suspect Earl will be out, and most likely back in the motel, by the second episode next season. Check out the latest episode over at NBC.com or download on iTunes.
Next Week’s Pick: Smallville, Thursday, 8:00, The CW: There is something big going down of the season finale of the show. Unfortunately someone’s lack of spoiler warning has, well, spoiled me, but I’ll be turning in just the same. Not to mention, no one does humongous cliffhanger like Smallville.
Download these shows on Amazon UnBox and watch them on your computer or transfer them to your Tivo:
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