I Want My Music Television: 5/3/16

Needed Me - Rihanna


Another Rihanna video and another Rihanna video where she wears a see-thru top. Why even wear clothes at this point.


Get You Back – Mayer Hawthorne


So we have reached the end of the Mayer Hawthorne noir trilogy and, well, it ended like every noir tale ever made, with him turning on the femme fatale. Guess I should have see that coming.


She Burns – Foy Vance


Putting hot chicks as a stand in is a music video staple, but Foy Vance (not to be confused with Vance Joy, the Riptide guy; not that I made that mistake or anything) could have done better than Aria. Should have tried to get Hannah instead.


Trash - Tyler Glenn


Rock music has slowly been dying for years and pop-rock is also nearly nonexistent anymore. Which makes it even more surprising that Neon Trees have managed multiple hits this decade. To the surprise of probably no one, lead singer Tyler Glenn came out as gay last year despite being a Mormon. His faith and sexuality are in stark contrast to each other in his first solo song and music video. I am just disappointed as catchy as the best Neon Trees songs are, this new song just sounds like every crappy dance-pop song that is making top forty unlistenable these days.

I Want My Music Television: 3/17/16

Left Handed Kisses – Andrew Bird featuring Fiona Apple


Simple music video from Andrew Bird. But I do wonder if Fiona Apple’s allusions to You Can Call Me Al were intentional or not.


California Kids – Weezer


Just last week I was mentioning how I kind of liked Weezer's new song even though the music video was embarrassingly bad. The new video just plays of the cringworthy videos they have produced from this album cycle but the song is almost as embarrassing.


This One's For Me and You - Johnny Gill featuring New Edition


Okay, not a full New Edition reunion because there is no Bobby Brown and it is technically just a Johnny Gill song featuring the other guys, but I will take it. But oh my, Biv is looking old, I fear he can no longer smack it up, flip it or rub it down.


Love Like That – Mayer Hawthorne


The second installment of Mayer Hawthorne’s noir music video anthology has arrived and it is already running thin. Why is he singing about wanting a love like that why developing crime scene photographs?

I Want My Music Television: 2/22/16

Cherry Wine - Hozier


It is nice to see Saoirse Ronan finally get some recognition with all the nominations she has racked up for her work in Brooklyn, I thought she was one of the greatests child actors ever after Atonement but she kind of faded into the background after that aside from an attempt at action stardom with Hanna. I had the theory that it is hard to become a superstar when everyone is afraid to even try to pronounce your name. Even when she told Stephan Colbert it is like "inertia" while discussing absurdly spelled Irish names recently. Now she has teamed up with fellow Irishman Hozier for a powerful music video that brings to light domestic abuse. Proceeds from the single download of Cherry Wine will benefit a series of domestic abuse charities worldwide. Please visit Hozier.com/cherrywine for more information about this campaign.

Upside Down and Inside Out - OK Go


The kings of viral videos are back with maybe their best yet as they claim is completely real and filmed in zero gravity. Lots of replayability trying to figure what was going on. My favorite part is the paint balls. But again, the biggest problem with their video is OK Go made a song that is not very good.

Cosmic Love - Mayer Hawthorne


Mayer Hawthorne is going Trapped in the Closet for his upcoming album in the sense that all the music videos will be part of a detective series, and with his throwback style, of course it is a noirish type story. I think I may just wait until the whole story is release before watching another one.

Golden Gal - Animal Collective


And here is another trippy video from Animal Collective.

When the Music's on She Can Do No Wrong

After years of trolling in relative obscurity, a blue-eye soul man finally had a smash hit this year. But enough about Robin Thicke, let’s talk about a blue eyed soul man who actually deserves big success: Mayer Hawthorne. Where Thicke needed six album to reach the top of the pop charts, Mayer Hawthorne is still on album number three just releasing Where Does This Door Go. But much like Robin, he worked with Pharrell Williams, who has had a career resurgence this year, who produced three songs on the album.

None of those tracks have the instant catchiness of Blurred Lines, but The Stars Are Ours sound like something that may have come out of a session from Pharrell’s other summer smash hit Get Lucky if he skipped the electric sound of Daft Punk and made a song completely organic. Pharrell also contributed to what is probably Mayer’s most personal song yet, Reach Out Richard about his father.

The cover and title may suggest a more reflexive turn (and the title track is a bit darker and as close to Pink Floyd as a blue eyed soul man can get), but the album is a much more danceable affair than his previous two. And Mayer also trade in his trademark falsetto for his normal tenor voice for most of the album, one of the few time he goes into the upper register is the last song Pharrell produced on the album and Wine Glass Woman is the song where Hawthorne sound most like Pharrell. The album closes with maybe the least Mayer Hawthorne song he has ever recorded with All Better, it is still in his retro wheelhouse, but trades in old time soul to oldies pop in the vein of The Beatles type power ballad. It may not come with a song off of Where Does This Door Go, but if there is any justice, Mayer Hawthorne will have his breakout moment very soon.

Song to Download – The Stars Are Ours

Where Does This Door Go gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

I Want My Music Television: 7/8/13

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.


I Got You - Jack Johnson


The opening shot looks like a recreation of the In Between Dreams album cover. I wonder if that is a hint at what the upcoming album will sound like because that (along with On and On) were his best albums while the last two Jack Johnson albums have been, though good, a bit of a bore. But the sound of the new song, musically sounds like the last two.


It’s You – Duck Sauce


I do not care if the new Duck Sauce music video is possibly (slightly, probably) racist, it is highly entertaining. And before you go and call me racist for enjoying the video, let me defend myself by saying I have never ever dreamed of participating in a plantation wedding or claimed to use the N-work in a positive manner (unless rapping along to N.W.A. counts).


Her Favorite Song - Mayer Hawthorne


If you ever wondered what a rap video would look like if it were populated by dogs, wonder no more. I just wonder how Mayer Hawthorne came up with this idea before Snoop Dogg.


Tennis Courts – Lorde


Last week I heaped a ton of superlatives on Lorde and I like the follow up single almost as much as Royals, and I have one more possibly hyperbolic superlative for this music video: it is one of the worst music video ever made. Ever. It reminds me of the Andy Kaufman / Mighty Mouse bit but at least he was trying to be funny intentionally. This is just creepy. It was as if someone thought, her just sitting there was the best part of the Royals, how about we make that the whole video or just have her lip-sync the “Yeah”. Um no, horrible idea.

I Want My Music Television - 10/10/11

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.

Someone Like You - ADELE



I love the sparseness of the video to go with the sparseness of the song. Though it is still at its best when you just close your eyes and listen to the voice of Adele.


Countdown – Beyoncé



Seizer alert! I do not know if Beyoncé went with a frantic video to distract from her baby bump, but it seriously hurt my head. And maybe I miss it in the middle of my convulsion, but this video was seriously missing a Boyz II Men reference (for the kiddies who do not know what I am talking about, head over to iTunes and download Uhh Ahh).


The Walk - Mayer Hawthorne



Hot chicks and guns: it as if Mayer Hawthorne made this video just for me. I am too lazy to look it up, but I am pretty sure that is the Token Hot Chick from The Event. Even though it is an obvious Mr & Mrs Smith homage, they are both such a bad shots, they might as well have been in an episode of The A-Team.


Shake it Out – Florence + The Machine



If this song is any indication, the new Florence + The Machine album should be epic, but am not really digging the Eyes Wide Shut styled video.

Best of the Week - 10/8/11

Quote of the Week: Because you don't have a girlfriend? Good Lord, if that becomes a reason not to play Dungeons and Dragons this game is in trouble. (Sheldon, The Big Bang Theory)

Song of the Week: Hot in Herre – Nelly (as sung by Caroline, 2 Broke Girls)

Scene of the Week:



Big News of the Week: The Ax Finally Drops: Just last week the president of NBC said he came from cable where shows can build a fan base, this week he canceled both The Playboy Club and Free Agents (yet giving pull season orders to the unfunny Up All Night and Whitney). The Playboy Club suffered from poor writing and worse acting while competing against both Monday Night Football and wrestling, the two of the biggest male audiences on television. Even more painful was The CW got into the action by pulling the plug on H8R before my episode of H8R where the producers of H8R ambush me for H8Ting on H8R even aired. CBS sort of had a cancelation; the network headscratchingly had Rules of Engagement by itself on Saturdays but before it aired its first weekend episode, it has been moved to Thursdays behind The Big Bang Theory with How to Be a Gentleman banished to the Saturday timeslot, essentially canceling it when it runs out of episodes. So let’s cue up It's So Hard To Say Goodbye To Yesterday and take one last look at Amber Heard in her bunny suit.



Free Download of the Week: No Strings – Mayer Hawthorne (iTunes)

Deal of the Week: Plenty of decent albums this month including a few noteworthy Greatest Hits packages from Huey Lewis, The Steve Miller Band, Styx, and possibly the greatest title for a Greatest Hits album from Jimmy Buffet: Song(s) You Know By Heart.



New Album Release of the Week: Ashes & Fire - Ryan Adams

New DVD Release of the Week: Chuck: The Complete Fourth Season [Blu-ray]

Video of the Week: Monday sees the return of Swamp Men at 10:00 on the Nat Geo Wild for third season and in the first episode back a novice gator handler learns to catch one with his bare hands while the other handlers try to rescure a baby alligator. Check out a preview below:

Baby Alligator Rescue


Next Week Pick of the Week: Last Man Standing, Tuesday at 8:00 on ABC: On paper this show does not look particularly good, nor does it look particularly good in motion either, yet for some reason I may end up watching this. It does star Loretta McCready, so maybe Raylan Gibbons may show up at some point. I and for the degenerate gamblers out there, I bet Vegas is already taking bets on when Zachary Ty Bryan and/or Jonathan Taylor Thomas show up.

I Want My Music Television - 9/7/11

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.

The Scientist – Willie Nelson



Just in case you did not think Willie Nelson covering Coldplay was random enough, here come the music video presented by Chipotle, that fast food restaurant you are familiar with but never actually visited, about, um, I have no idea. Are we not supposed to eat pork or something?


A Long Time - Mayer Hawthorne



The latest from Mayer Hawthorne is a good enough song, but the rediscovered VHS tap has been done before and better by multiple artists (see Snoop Dogg). Okay seeing some dude doing the Thriller dance is still entertaining and the random country jingle. I cannot believe Don Draper okayed that to air.


Love the Way You Walk Away – Blitzen Trapper



You may remember Blitzen Trapper from my Best of Neo-Folk and the boys have a new album coming out soon and here is their first single. Even though I have a bunch of their songs on my iPod, I new the band consisted of lead singer Josh Groban, keyboardist Napoleon Dynamite, and the dude from The Civil Wars on bass.


Hot Buns – Foo Fighters



Um, so the Foo Fighters created this video to promote their upcoming tour. Just do not ask me why they decided to do so by dressing up by Willie Nelson, Rob Zombie, and ZZ Top. For those braver than me, there is an uncensored version.

I Want My Music Television vol. LXXXII

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.


Un-thinkable (I'm Ready) - Alicia Keys



As a white dude I am not sure what I am more offended by: that when Alicia keys thinks of a token white dude, she thinks Chad Michael Murray, c’mon, when you are such a bad actor that you are not even good enough to star in One Tree Hill anymore you should just give up the profession, or when she thinks white dude in the eighties, he has to have a mullet.


Undo It - Carrie Underwood



You rarely the live performance spliced with non-live and miniskits, but Undo It - Play On gave it a try for some reason. And as much as I want to dislike this song, it just gets stuck in my head for way to long.


If It's Love - Train



Wait, another storyline to live performance video? I guess this is a beginning of a trend. Not so fun fact: the latest music video by Train was directed by Pete Wentz. Why? Who know, or cares.


One Track Mind - Mayer Hawthorne



Alicia Keys thinks she has it bad, One Track Mind is stuck in a love triangle with the real girl from Lars and the Real Girl.

I Want My Music Television vol. LXXVI

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.


Do Wah Doo – Kate Nash



Just days after Barney Stinson mentioned that stewardess was the hottest profession of the 50’s, here comes a video from Kate Nash where she starts as a 50’s stewardess. Flight Suit Up.


In the Sun – She and Him



From the first single it sounds like Volume 2 from She and Him is going to sound much like Volume 1: kind of bland. But at least the music video is fun with Zooey Deschanel looking her Winnie Cooperest.


Wavin’ Flag – K’Naan



For all the soccer fans out there (or football to all you foreigners) prepare yourself to be hearing this song from K’Naan a lot this summer at is the official song of the upcoming World Cup.


I Wish it Would Rain - Mayer Hawthorne



Pretty cool concept for a video for the latest from Mayer Hawthorne, too bad The Swell Season came up with pretty much the same idea last year.

I Want My Music Television vol. LXXIV

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.

Giving up the Gun – Vampire Weekend



Sure the whole world is focused on Winter sports right now (and how the Americans went to Canada to upset the host nation last night), but Vampire Weekend are still stuck in the Hamptons mindset and featured tennis in their new video and who better than the RZA to be the referee. And as a tennis coach? Of course, Lil John, because he always tells the truth.


Maybe So, Maybe So – Mayer Hawthorne



Another summer pastime, instead of the thrilling snowboard cross, we get a leisurely skateboarding romp in the latest Mayer Hawthorne video.


Alice – Avril Lavigne



Straight from her ProActive commercial (seriously, how much money are they paying all these celebrities to go on television and say, “look how bad my skin used to be”) Avril Lavigne gets the theme to the new Alice in Wonderland movie. Considering his track record on reenvisioning (Sleepy Hollow, Planet of the Apes, Willy Wonka) I am not sure why Tim Burton is going back to that well again considering how inventive his original ideas are.


The Only Exception – Paramore



Get your lighters ready, it’s a Paramore power ballad.

Feed Your iPod vol. XXXXI: Just Ain't Gonna Work Out

When coming up with a list of anything that is 100 deep, I can understand how daunting it is to digest it and you may overlook things that you do not recognize it. If that was the case for my list of The 100 Best Songs of 2009 and you just skimmed over Mayer Hawthorne at #55 because he hasn’t gotten much radio airplay, here is hoping you give a look at him today and see why his soul-infused song landed on the chart. And I am still just getting to know him myself because I never checked out the video for Just Ain’t Gonna Work Out until writing this up leading to these two reactions, 1) I really should have had this on my 50 Best Music Videos of 2009 list and 2) what, dude’s white? Either way, here’s hoping Mayer gets his breakout in 2010.

Just Ain’t Gonna Work Out – Mayer Hawthorne