Big News of the Week: Jason Collins Is a Gay Homosexual: Monday, Jason Collins announced Monday that he was gay and after everyone got done asking, “Who is Jason Collins” it turned out he was the first current professional male athlete to publically announced his homosexuality (although he currently is not on a team and as an old journeyman, it may actually stay that way, though I am sure David Stern will make sure he is employed by someone next season). But the most interesting part of his story was that the guy who backed him up at center in high school was Jason Segal. Yes, that Jason Segal.
Preview Picture of the Week:
2 Broke Girls "And the Tip Slip" Monday at 9:00 on CBS
Video of the Week: The Walking Dead bad lip reading video is about as well written as the actual show. The best part is when it turns into a musical.
Next Week Pick of the Week: Locked Up Abroad, Sunday (tomorrow) at 10:00 on the National Geographic Channel: Now that you have seen the movie, now it is time to hear the real story of Argo from the people who lived it. And unlike the movie which featured Ben Affleck saving diplomats in Iran, tomorrow’s special episode of Locked Up Abroad features mostly testimonials from those who needed the rescuing. The real Ben Affleck character does not even show up for the first twenty minutes, but when he does show up, he had the best line, “This was the best bad idea we had.”
Revenge: Booooooo!!! How dare they kill off Rebecca Logan? Seriously Creepy Initiative Dude, why keep her alive six weeks only to kill her? This show really trying my patience. C’mon, they kill of Rebecca Logan and Charlotte is still around, slapping people at parties?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.
The Walking Dead: Clearly the scariest zombie the popped up on screen this episode was the commercial for the walking corpse that is The Killing. Truly horrifying that the show is returning for a third season. But anyway. After giving Andrea her own episode two weeks ago they actually killed her off. Good riddance. I guess it was artistically cool that she basically went out like her sister, even by her own hadn again, but it is hard to care when you have never cared about the character. This leaves only five original actors from the first season. Who would have guessed Carol would outlast everyone? But it looks like they are going to get an influx of new red shirts for next season when they literally bussed in a bunch of old folks and children who were too weak to fight from Woodbury. Yeah, that will turn out well. Much like Peter, Bjorn, and John, I don’t really care about the young folks taking about the young stuff. And I don’t care about the old folds talking about the old style too. And why go back to the prison at all?
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.
Shameless: They are not really going to kill off Steve are they? Not that I would mind that much, I am beginning to think the show would have been better had he stayed on the lamb. And who knew Frank had it in him to take the fall for Carl. Did not see that coming.
The Voice: There is nothing I hate more then when people whine about semi-professionals being on the show because they think those contestants have an unfair advantage. I watch the show because the semi-professional makes the show much better than the armature competitions out there. And the unfair advantage argument does not hold because the three most successful people to ever have auditioned failed to get anyone to turn a chair. Last season one hit wonder Cupid and Christopher Trousdale, who sold a million records as part of Dream Street went home early. And this week Julie Roberts, who has a gold record, could not even get her acquaintance Blake Shelton to turn around. Personally I am disjointed that I have not recognized any contestant this season. Where is the token Warped Tour Chick for the season (granted Cassadee Pope did not show until the last week last season.
One complaint I do have had about The Voice is that it lacked a true rock judge (Adam Levine is more a pop-RnB guy even if his band has a guitar player). Maybe Shakira will fill that box. This week she picked up Brandon Rouch who looks like he fronted a band from Seattle twenty years ago as well as returning rock singer Garrett Garnder (who almost did not get anyone to turn around two straight seasons until Sharika pushed her button at the last second). And who would have guessed Seven Nation Army would become the standard from The White Stripes library? This is the third straight season someone perform the song. I would have guessed We’re Going to Be Friends would be their song most likely to become a standard.
Oddly they cut down the Blind Auditions by three hours this season, with only twelve contestants per team, down from sixteen last season but back to season two numbers. This makes me wonder if they are already getting rid of the useless Knockout Round. But does that also mean are they getting rid of The Steal because I do not see them having seven or eight contestants from each team in the Live Round. My guess is they will have the Battle Round with a Steal (Shakira already mentioned stealing people), the Knockout Round (which hopefully they introduce another steal) with four or five contestants per team making it to the Live Rounds.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs from The Voice with the widget at right.
Dallas: When the babies flat lined last week, I did not give much thought to it because assumed they would revive them by this week. Wow, they actually let the twins die. I not sure if that was the right decision because the storylines might be much better tying Christopher and Pamela forever. But in the short term, it will be interesting if Pamela will eventually find out her father was behind the explosion.
You can download Dallas on iTunes.
Castle: I knew from the beginning that Castle’s imagination was getting the best of him by thinking his across the street neighbor killed his girlfriend, but I have to admit by the time Beckett went over there, I starting thinking that maybe he was a murderer. And that was a great reveal that the whole thing was an giant birthday present. Which was a good thing because the other plot was a bit boring.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.
Justified: A good episode, but it seemed to be lacking something as a season finale. The scene with Raylan telling Augustine he would not leave the limo alive, even saying he had not left the limo yet as he exited it himself to like Sonny Tonin gun down Augustine was classic Raylan, and would have been a great moment for a middle of the season episode, but I wanted more. And it was weird that a season about getting Drew Thomson the finale lacked Drew Thompson, and the reason the FBI wanted Drew Thomson, Theo Tonin skipped town to the extradition free country of Tunisia. I wonder if Alan Arkin was unavailable all season and if this season would have been any different had he would had made an appearance.
So no Drew Thompson and no Ellen May (also conspicuously absent: Johnny Crowder who I am surprised made it out of the season alive) but Boyd and Ava had to spend the episode trying to clean up Ellen May’s confession, ultimately failing. I do not think it was a wise decision for the funeral director to let Boyd to stay out of jail, that will come back to bite him next season. Hopefully Ava gets sent to a co-ed prison where she can bunk with Dewey Crowe and Dickey Bennett.
You can download Justified on iTunes.
Survivor: Caramoan: When I compiled my list of The 25 Dumbest Survivor Contestants Ever list fout seasons ago, number one was a no brainer to the point of being the most obvious number one of any list I have ever compiled: Erik giving up his Immunity Necklace. Though Brandon Hantz came close, Erik would still grab the top spot if I were ever to update the list. So it was quite amazing that the rest of this season rested in the hands of the ice cream scooper. This led to one of the most heart racing Tribal Councils in recent memory as you tried to figure out which way Erik (and to a lesser extent Sherri who took a defeatist attitude at tribal council).
Thankfully he chose wisely because had he gone with the alpha male alliance, it would have been a slow slog to the finale as the vote out their former Favorites tribemates. Instead now you have a solid alliance of four (Cochran, Dawn, Andrea, Philip), their lackeys (Brenda, Erik), two people completely on the outs (Sheri, Michael), and what’s left of the alpha male alliance (Malcolm, Douchebag #1, Douchebag #2) who would seem like the first three to go, except they have two Immunity Idols between them. So the solid alliance needs to keep Sheri with them AND recruit Michael (I told Philip it was a huge mistake to let Corrine keep Michael over Julia) to have enough people to split the votes. And even then, what if the two people the split the vote with both use an Idol? And what if the two lackeys and the Fans team up with the final Alpha Male Alliance member. So not only was the fate of the season in Erik’s hands once this season, it may not be the only vote where Erik becomes the deciding vote. God help us all.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download Survivor: Philippines on iTunes.
Modern Family: Wait, Hayley grows up to be Justine Bateman? What?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Modern Family on iTunes.
Nashville: I find it interesting that during the Ho Hey sing-along, Deakon chose to shout the former instead of the latter at Rayna. And with all the interaction with Maddie this episode (he even told her she looked more like her mother than her father, who is not even her real father), I wonder when exactly is Deakon going to find out that she is his daughter.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.
The Americans: Before I talk about this episode, for those who watched via DVR and had the final eight minutes cut off, you can re-watch the episode at fxnetworks.com until May 15.
I still think of the Jennings children the same way I do Chris Brody and Bobby Draper (not at all) but I did love the daughter’s reaction to the potential big news (mom’s too old to be pregnant) and the son’s history report (America won). But it was a nice tension breaker in what turned out to being the shocking plot twist that Philip inadvertently killed Stan’s partner. A real game changer of an episode.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.
Community: Uh oh, Allison has some Brie competition with the arrival of Larson to the show. But it was very disappointing that did not have a Brie off.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Community on iTunes.
Hannibal: I feared with the serious subject manner that Bryan Fuller’s trademark wit would somehow get lost in the adaptation, but those fears were put to rest when Lawrence Fishburn yelled at someone to use the ladies room so he would continue to yell at someone without being bothered. And Dr. Lecter and his patient was pretty humorous too.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Hannibal on iTunes.
Once Upon a Time: The scene back from the last commercial break may have been the most absurd thing ever aired on network television. First off you had Pinocchio die from a taser, c’mon, how does someone made of wood be harmed by a little electricity? But of course before he died, he was able to crawl out of the police station utter a couple nonsensical words before going to the big wood chipper in the sky. But since he died trying to help someone (and failing at that), the blue fairy was able to turn him into a real boy (again). And by real boy, an actual ten year old who apparently has no memory of the past twenty years. So Pinocchio gets to live even though he helped no one. In fact they are in more danger because of him.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.
Revenge: What a weird way to wrap up the foster brother storyline. Why not to tell Amanda your plan the whole time?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.
The Walking Dead: I guess it is surprising Merle made it this long. He probably should have never made it off the roof. Or out of Woodbury. Or in a prison with Michonne. But it became pretty clear that it is a worse punishment not to die, because instead of putting a bullet in Merle’s head, he sentenced him to a life of a zombie. That may have been the most evil of all of the Governor’s evil deeds.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.
Shameless: So Jimmy has had two years of med school and only one more to go? Since when did becoming a doctor only take three years? I thought it took ten.
The Voice: If there was any question to if the new judges could successfully replace the former ones, it was answered when Shakira pulled out her English to Country dictionary. And Usher had a very entertaining moment when he called Nashville a state despite being born in the same state where the city resides. Even though the coaching panel turned out to be solid, I was a bit worried with the talent on the stage after the first episode because all the contestants were petty lackluster including the weakest four chair audition in the Morgan Sisters. Things turned around the next day (no pun intended, okay, maybe a little) with two artists that deserved all the coach’s button pushes in Midas Whale and Sarah Simmons, both who ended up on Adam’s team making him the early frontrunner (not to mention the Michael Jackson backup singer he picked up a day earlier who I found overrated; Judith Hill is no Amanda Brown). And they really amped up the sob stories this season between the dead bandmates and dead children (made worse by no one turning around). Of course there some absurd sob stories. When you look like a cross between Amanda Seyfried and Emma Stone and the worst thing that has happened to you is getting teased about a snaggletooth, you probably should not be singing Mean.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs from The Voice using the widget at right.
How I Met Your Mother: I would have liked this episode much better if the chopped off the last five minutes. The only way the ending could have been more depressing would be if they played a Ryan Adams song during it. And no, I will not tell you the ingredients of The Scooter McGavin alcoholic beverage that I created back in college because I am paranoid someone with plagiarize it. That and I may have forgotten the ingredients because I drank too many Scooter McGavin’s in college.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.
Castle: When we saw Ryan at home I thought, oh goodness, I have zero interest following that guy home. And then he went and got himself slapped by a mobster. Unfortunately the rest of the episode was not as entertaining as him getting slapped.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.
Go On: Between this episode and Cougar Town, I am beginning to wonder if there ever was a time when Courtney Cox was ever funny.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Go On on iTunes.
Justified: It became pretty clear that Colton would not make it to the end of the season, most likely at Tim’s hand, it is a little surprising he got gunned down before the finale (was this Tim’s first on screen kill in the series?) Which makes me wonder who will they kill off in the finale, or how many? Mike O’Malley cannot possible survive after threatening the life if Raylan’s unborn daughter. And will Theo Tonin finally make an appearance or will they be saving him to be the big bad of season five? I cannot wait to find out.
You can download Justified on iTunes.
Survivor: Caramoan: Apparently Philip did not learn that much from Boston Rob because I image Rob would have cut Corrine lose last night. He would have at the very least given Michael the boot because Corrine was cozying up with him. And splitting the vote was silly. If Michael or whatshername actually had the Idol, they would have played it last week. It is a shame that a Favorite is going to win because these are some of the most inept players in the history of the game.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download Survivor: Philippines on iTunes.
Once Upon a Time: It was pretty silly that they tried to make us wonder who in the cast was going to die when it was quite obvious that Cora would be the one that perished. And that was before the flashbacks featured her (anyone who watched Lost knows if someone was going to die, it would be whosever flashbacks were that week).
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.
Revenge: Emily claimed after Amanda’s funeral there would be no more distractions, the promo monkeys even made a marketing campaign around the saying, but it is hard to take the writers at their word when her foster brother shows up to her doppelganger’s funeral which I assume will be a pretty huge distraction next week. He better be gone soon some Emily can actually take down some more people this season. Come to think of it, I think the Grayson’s have taken down more people this season than Emily.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.
The Walking Dead: It is too bad that the summit did not involve Hershel and Milton because their conversation was much more interesting. Adn I like how the two henchmen knew they were going to end up killing each other soon enough.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.
Vikings: There are plenty of ways to show just how evil a character is, but offering up your wife to someone to see if he is dumb enough to take you up on the offer is a new one. I kind of like it.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Vikings on iTunes
Dallas: I know some grumbled about disrespecting the memory of Larry Hagman by having fights breakout during the J.R. Ewing memorial and going the Who Murderer J.R. plotline, but the guy played J.R. Ewing, it would seems more disrespectful to not send him out with a bang. And I doubt Patrick Duffy and Linda Grey would have been a part of anything that would have disrespected Hagman’s legacy.
You can download Dallas on iTunes.
Deception: The big question going into the finale is that Robert have Julian’s girlfriend killed because he thinks she killed his daughter or did he kill his daughter and she made a good scapegoat who now cannot defend herself in court, essentially closing the case. But Robert never struck me as someone who would kill his own family considering the lengths he went through to keep his son out of jail and to hide her pregnancy. I have pretty much thought from the beginning and still believe his wife was the one who killed Vivian because she threatened to tell Mia who her real mother was. Hopefully we get a definitive answer and not some lame fake out like The Killing because unlike The Killing, there will probably not be a second season.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Deception on iTunes.
Pretty Little Liars: Wait, what? Spencer joined the A Team?!? Sure I have a feeling she just joining to be a mole to bring down the A Team from the inside, but still shocking nonetheless. But I still do not believe Toby is dead until I see something more than a fading tattoo. And why is it the only time the Liars are candy stripers is when they sneak into the morgue.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.
The Lying Game: I pretty much figured Thayer last week was behind the murders last week when he had to be the guy who burglarized Rebecca’s place, I just have not figured out why. Does the dude just have serious rage issues; killing Derek and then killing Teresa because she somehow found out? Then had the hubris to think he could pin it in Alec (who in turn thought he could pin it on Rebecca who herself thought could pin it on Alex; what a marriage). I also cannot figure out why Rebecca would throw Alex through the skylight. Unless she did not and Alec actually went so far as to throw himself through the skylight to make sure Rebecca gets pinned for all three murders. This is getting confusing.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Lying Game on iTunes.
Justified: A bit of an anti-climatic episode after learning that Sherriff Shelby is Drew Thompson though it was nice to see Limehouse again. But I am intrigued about the next episode with the final line, “We just have to get out of Harlan alive.” Maybe they can sneak out in Wynn Duffy’s Wynnabego.
You can download Justified on iTunes.
Survivor: Caramoan: Note to CBS: Stop it with the Hantz family. This is the second time a tribe threw a challenge just to get rid of a person with the last name. The Favorites did not even go through the motions of throwing; they just showed up to the Immunity Challenge and said just take us to Tribal Council, something that has never happened before. I actually feared for the safety of the tribe, you could have told me Brandon raped Andrea, pushed Philip into the fire, or harmed himself in some way and I would have believed you. Seriousyl CBS, no more Hantz’s
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download Survivor: Philippines on iTunes.
The Neighbors: Usually television shows wait until they run out of ideas to do a musical number so I am a little worried about the quality of the rest of the season.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Neighbors on iTunes.
The Americans: The length spies will go through to get their way. You had Philip’s former flame telling him he had a son just to manipulate him, Beeman’s asset sleeping with him, telling him there were no strings when there were strings all over the place. Who would have guessed Elizabeth’s crotch grab would be the tamest way of getting things done this week? And I have a sinking suspicion that, much like on Justified, Mags Bennett will only last one season.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.
The Big Bang Theory: Speaking of running out of ideas, I really hate when comedies try to force heavy subjects into their plots which always seems to happen. Although I would not mind a Very Special Episode like the ones in the eighties. There really are not any Very Special Episodes anymore.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.
Community: C’mon, if you are going to reference Memento, just go ahead and do a full Memento parody. Hopefully it was a hint of what is to come and Chang Kevin will be covered in tatoos next episode.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Community on iTunes.
The Walking Dead: One thing I really hated about Lost is that they would set up something, forget about it, and they finally pay it off long after everyone stopped caring. That was the case this episode when Rick finally ran into the dude who saved him in the series premiere. This meeting should have happened late in the first season or early in the third. But it was still one of the better episodes in the show as Rick finally met someone crazier than he is, but you got to love all the booby traps that crazy dude set up for the walkers and the barely living.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.
Shameless: I was wondering when Karen would pop up again. I figured after Lip gave her a call it would not be long. Though I cannot image she will stick around that long after learning how much it will take to care for her son and just let the grandparents fight over him.
Vikings: It dawned on me about half way through the episode it may not have been the best idea to do a basic cable version of Game of Thrones set in the real world. But the “This season on” package did leave me intrigued so I probably give the show another episode or two to win me over.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Vikings on iTunes
House of Lies: I never thought anyone could ruin a Kristen Bell Sex Tape, but they somehow managed to do that. Thanks House of Lies.
Switched at Birth: It is brave to try an all ASL episode, but I think it could have been better conceived. I thought maybe they would have a national day of silence in protest of the closing of Carlton. Or maybe follow a day in the life of Daphne or even Emmitt for a day. The way they did it seemed a little to force to avoid any spoken dialogue.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Switched At Birth on iTunes.
Dallas: It does not really mattered what happened in the first fifty-nine minutes, something about a silly car race, and the third Ewing brother made his first appearance in Dallas in about three decades, all that matters is the two gunshots that ended the episode. Any other show, it may have been in bad taste to murder off the character of an actor who died in real like, but in the case of Larry Hagman, it seems like a fitting tribute to send off J.R. Ewing with a murder mystery considering Who Shot J.R. was one of the biggest storylines ever in the history of television. I am sure next episode we will get a fitting tribute, but after that we will start for the hunt for J.R.’s killer. Since he was (supposedly) half the world away when he was shot, that rules out everyone in the main cast unless there was a time jump we are unaware of. Your probably have to put Cliff Barnes at the top of the list (but would he be so brazen, as the promo monkeys would have suggest, show up and taunt the death of his rival at his own funeral after killing him). Could Sue Ellen’s sister, who originally shot J.R., come back to finish the job? Um no, it turns out she overdosed and drowned in a pool during the original run. But maybe her son, Christopher finished what his biological mother started. Maybe Gary showing up in Dallas was not a coincidence. Or to tie it back into the modern day version, maybe one of Vincente’s buddies are set to avenge his death.
You can download Dallas on iTunes.
Pretty Little Liars: Well that was a completely random and completely shoehorned in celebrity cameo. At least tease that it would be possible that Missy Franklin could be A, put her in a red coat or something. But even worse, are they actually going to let Ezra teach again… in high school? What, what?!? Apparently even the principal knows something went on, how could he let this happen? Why will Ella work with a dude who sleeping with her high school daughter? These are the worst administrators and parents ever.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.
The Lying Game: So the dude in the black hoodie had to be Thayer right? Everything points to either Rebecca or Alec being the one who killed the one dude and kidnapped (and looks also killed) Teresa, but could Thayer be behind it the whole time? But then the question is why.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Lying Game on iTunes.
Justified: Where most law enforcement shows are about who did it, Justified has almost always been a show where we knew who the criminal was early on with the show being much more about the chase. So it is not surprising that the show would unveil its first real long mystery with three episodes to go, maybe it is surprising they did not reveal who Drew Thompson was earlier. Although some could argue that they revealed that Sherriff Shelby was Drew last week when his conversation with Ellen May made it so obvious that I assumed it was going to be a red herring. So now Raylan, and Boyd and Theo Tonin, have three episodes to hunt down Drew. Oh, and Boyd has extra incentive to find him too because it looks like he took Ellen May with him.
It was surprising how funny this episode was considering it came in the wake of Arlo death. The shootout between Constable Bob and the white collar criminals was hilarious, Art’s tirade the kicked off the episode, Raylan still had his trademark wit, and of course all of Wynn Duffy’s reactions were priceless (I bet he did not think a federal agent would be making a house call with a federal prisoner). I was also surprised that the preacher’s sister finally reappeared and it did not involve her teaming up with Ellen May, instead she teamed up with Tim. Is Gutterson finally going to get some love on the show?
You can download Justified on iTunes.
Survivor: Caramoan: What a crime against humanity that the Fans voted out the three hot chicks right in a row. And it was completely short sided to get rid of Laura now, she definitely had the better argument in that you cannot trust Fratboy #1 or Fratboy#2 if they switch things up and keeping them will no way guarantee winning any challenges (and it was hypocritical of the Fratboys for saying they needed to keep a stronger team yet voted for Shamar, probably the strongest person on their team, twice in a row). And more importantly, how do you vote off the three hottest chicks in your tribe in your first three Tribal Councils? I am beginning to worry about the longevity of Andrea now.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download Survivor: Caramoan on iTunes.
The Neighbors: I feel bad for Jackie if the only song she has found on the planet Earth has been Semi-Charmed Life.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Neighbors on iTunes.
The Americans: Holy frack, Felicity just beat the crap out of Mags Bennett!!! Did not see that coming. I did see that they were being interrogated by the KGB, that was pretty obvious, it is way too early to for the United States government to be on to them (I will be surprised if that happens sometimes before the season finale).
You can download The Americans on iTunes.
King of the Nerds: A couple weeks Jeff Probst did a podcast with Chuck Closterman when Chuck asked Probst if Survivor rewarded mediocrity. His reasoning was simple: all the weak players get eliminated first, and then all the strong people get voted off after the merge, leaving the mediocre to win most seasons. I could not help think of that conversation while Celeste got crowned King of the Nerds. Going into the finals I thought Genevieve would sweep the vote, she was her team’s leader and won three Nerd Off’s while Celeste did not have one signature moment on the show, but mediocrity was awarded (two people weirdly mentioned Celeste’s “growth” as the reason for voting for her). Yawn.
You can download King of the Nerds on iTunes.
Once Upon a Time: Wow, eyeless girl was creepier than anything on The Walking Dead this week. Although will Mr. Gold be willing to get rid of his grandson just because he will be his downfall? Stupid question, this is a guy who let his son slip through a portal alone just to keep his powers.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.
Revenge: It was pretty obvious that the person at the bottom of the boat would turn out to be the evil dock guy, but I never would have guessed that he would take Amanda down with him. After she had Jack’s baby, I assumed she would be here for the long haul of the show. Hopefully this inspires Emily to get back to taking people down again and stop with all this slow and boring cooperate espionage that has gone on this season.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.
The Walking Dead: I thought crazy Rick stopped after he realized he was getting phone calls from beyond the grave. Ugg. And all the zombies that came out of that delivery truck might as well all had wigs on because that was essentially a clown car.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.
Shameless: Of course child services shows up at the most chaotic time ever on the show. It will be hard for to get the Gallagher’s to get out of this one, but I have a feeling the inept worker will help them out inadvertently or not. And can you really get pregnant with a turkey baster? I always that that was an urban legend.
House of Lies: Uh, oh, Veronica Mars went on a blind date with the Hearst rapist this week. Hopefully she will be back next week with all her hair.
How I Met Your Mother: I am too lazy to even bother to think about it, but I am pretty sure the show has done the three stories from three perspectives before, probably multiple times, and it it gets less interesting every time. With that said, I kind of want to watch this episode again just to see of Barney’s Austrian king actually shows up in the background somewhere.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.
Switched at Birth: I had the new girl pegged to be a mole, she was acting a little too weird, but I would not have guessed that she would turn out to be the opponent’s daughter. But will Toby be able to use that to his father’s advantage?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Switched At Birth on iTunes.
Bunheads: I did not think the show could top the weirdness Istanbul dance from last summer, but I think they may have done so with the dancing miners.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Bunheads on iTunes. 2 Broke Girls:
Castle: I was going to take this time to make numerous Taken jokes, but the promo monkeys already beat me to it with the previews showing an upcoming Liam Neeson joke. Hurmph.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.
Pretty Little Liars: Do people in the suburbs really have shower / spas like that in their homes? I defiantly need one.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.
Go On: I am really ready for Simone to go back to wherever she came from.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Go On on iTunes.
Justified: The video that Jody made for Raylan (with the aid of Paul Kinsey!) was so entertaining I will completely ignore that he really never had the time to make said video (or how implausible that basically every episode this season so far took part in less than a week). Also the show could use more Jackie Nevada. I take her over Ava, Wynona, or the barmaid from earlier this season. If you cannot get enough of Nevada, I highly recommend Raylan the book (see my review here), this episode is basically the end of the book, except there was no doubt if Raylan got any. Then again, in my experience, whenever a girl leaves the bathroom door open when she takes a shower, it is a sign she wants you to join her. Okay, that has never actually happened to me.
You can download Justified on iTunes.
Survivor: Caramoan: I really like the trend of people outing other people at tribal council who have a Hidden Immunity Idol. I do not like the trend of people claiming that they are going to use said Idol but keep it in their pocket. I also do not like how the “Player of the Week” commercial is almost always spoilery. When both Laura and Douchebag #1 (not to be confused with Douchebag #2 whose name I also have no desire to learn) were up for the award, you knew they were going to do something but they did nothing interesting before then. I am usually good at skipping the ad, but the show really needs to move it to the last commercial break to avoid such spoilers.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download Survivor: Caramoan - Fans vs. Favorites on iTunes.
Modern Family: Holy Bud Bundy sighting! T is a shame that it took Al this long to get his son some work.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Modern Family on iTunes.
The Americans: It is weird watching this episode with all the paranoia that the Russians were behind the shooting of Ronald Regan when we now know that some crazy dude did it just to impress Jody Foster (I hear she’s currently single). I guess the closes thing similar that I can think of was when the power went out here and most of the northeastern part of the United States right after 9/11 and everyone thought it was another terrorist attack, but just turned out that our power grid just sucks. And a decade later, they still have not fixed it.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.
Community: I am now convinced the new showrunners are just fracking with us between the Stockholm Syndrome attempt and Luke Perry and Jennie Garth ruining Inspector Spacetime. This is going to be a long final season.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Community on iTunes.
King of the Nerds: It is weird that for a show entitled King of the Nerds, that there is only one guy that remains even though the game started out with more guys than girls. I guess it may not be all that surprising that a bunch of male nerds would get flustered with chicks around, losing ever head to head gender battle in the Nerd Off. Now will the chicks band together to make sure Ivan (like when Parvati won Survivor) or with the self implode and let the guy win (like that season with Eliza)? Actually come to think of it, has there ever been an all male final on Survivor? (Researching… It has happened three times out of twenty-five seasons; five were all female)
Once Upon a Time: So Jack of the beanstalk fame was a chick? Alrighty. About as realistic as watching Hurley trying to run. I also like the promo monkeys making it sound like the reveal of Mr. Gold’s son is going to eb a shocking reveal as anyone who has watched has already figured out that his son is also Henry’s baby daddy.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.
Revenge: It is common knowledge that the second season of the show just is not as entertaining as the first. I would argue that the Jump the Shark moment was when it was revealed that it was not Daniel who died as witnessed during the series premiere but the Rent Boy instead. And it looks like the show is going to pull that cheap storytelling again this season as it was teases that Jack would end up at the bottom of the ocean at some point but will not actually pull it off as I bet the evil dock owner is the one that will end up dead. Hurmph.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.
The Walking Dead: So after coherently invading Woodbury and successfully saving Glen, Maggie, and then Daryl, Rick is bat-ish crazy again. Yep, seems right. Welcoming back The Walking Dead.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.
Shameless: Just when you think the show has run out of new ways to offend the audience, a third Malkovich child shows up with an extra package. Apparently nothing came out of Frank calling child services a couple weeks ago, but I am beginning to think maybe a representative should start showing up on set.
House of Lies: I try to avoid anything that involves Matt Damon and got tired of actors playing a douchebag version of themselves a long time ago, but this may have been the most entertaining episode of the show yet.
Switched at Birth: Is it wrong that I started yelling “Deaf Fight!!!” during this episode? Please do not answer that, I already know the answer.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Switched At Birth on iTunes.
How I Met Your Mother: Just when you think this was going to be another episode where the writers beat an already not very funny joke into the ground, out walks Mike Tyson. Well done writers, well done.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.
Dallas: I wonder why Ryland and his mother are perpetrating Bobby lie that he shot him. Does Ryland actually not remember and his mommy told him who shot him? As much as they hate Anne, why not let her rot in jail?
You can download Dallas on iTunes.
Deception: O wow, I was actually right that the dude from the John Laraquette Show was actually Mia father. And now I am beginning to think he killed Edward’s one night stand to have leverage over the Bowers family. But even if the statute of limitations of statutory rape runs out after five years, would accessory to murder still get him jail time. I may just have to move him up on my list of suspect to number two after step-mommy.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Deception on iTunes.
Pretty Little Liars: Huh, it looked like Jason’s flashback was going to show what happened after Mr. Montgomery got threatened by Allison and then Spencer’s sister walked out of her house, but instead of Allison, Jason saw… CeCe? Huh? Maybe it is CeCe is the red coat that is the Master A. And where did Jason go? Unles the Liars are that unobservant that h would just slip by, did he really jump out of the window after falling down an elevator shaft?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.
Justified: I guess I was not the only one who thought Major Dad was also Drew Thompson. Granted until I see his high school wrestling pictures under the name Josiah, I would be highly suspicious that he still is. But if Major Dad is not Drew Thompson, who is? Since the show like to recycle its guest stars, I have a feeling we have already met him (for half a second, I actually thought that Arlo may be Drew Thompson, but Raylan is too old to not know his father changed his name). Could it be the half naked judge from News Radio? Sherriff Shelby? Constable Bob? Wynn Duffy? Please oh, please let it be Dewey Crowe.
You can download Justified on iTunes.
Nashville: I wonder if Gunner and Scarlett ditch Avery’s band just like Avery did. They get wind that Rayna may want to sign them, and no mention of the other guys. I guess with a show with this name, someone needs to stay in Nashville.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.
The Americans: Holy Mags Bennett sighting! You knew when Mags showed up in dinner, she was not going to be just some random creepy chick; the only question would be if she were KGB or FBI (or some other three letter agency). It turns out she is the new KGB boss and has no problem killing a chick. But I guess that was the only reasonable outcome (again showing again just how soft the Jennings are getting), with the kid going to his grandparents in Mother Russia.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.
Community: Note to the new showrunner: no more Scary Annie please. It is not brain surgery, put her in highly GIF-able situations. No need to over-think things when it comes to her.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Community on iTunes.
Once Upon a Time: When Snow White and Emma jumped into the portal, I thought, “Wait, are they really going to leave Sleeping Beauty and Mulan in a deserted world with Cora?” Seems kind of rude. Granted Cora and Hook ended up finding their way to Storybrooke so the duo is basically alone with a bunch of ogres, giants, maybe Frankenstein’s monster and the lifeless body of the Prince.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.
Revenge: I realize this week that I liked the show much better when Emily was taking down people one week at a time than all this cooperate espionage that just goes way over my head this season. I do not really care about the British dude and they literally doubled down on the bar takeover storyline by bringing in another brother who does nothing but just repeats what his brother said. And the Initiative is such an evil monolith they hang out in a room that looks like the Injustice League lair.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.
The Walking Dead: I hate it when shows think they are going to be all clever by not starting an episode which what is expected (in this case Rick storming Woodbury) but instead introducing unknown characters. But I guess whenever introduce a new black dude; the old black dude has to be killed off.
As Rick was leaving Woodbury, I was disappointed because the whole season seemed to be building of a confrontation between the sheriff and The Governor. Then a couple minutes later Michonne sticks a shard of glass in The Governor’s eye and all the disappointment disappeared. I guess we may have to wait until the season finale to see the Rick / Governor showdown.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.
Homeland:Since Abu Nazir is the only thing keeping Brody from a Quinn delivered bullet, how much more in trouble can he get for essentially killing the Vice (and possibly future) President? I doubted how Brody could make it out alive during the first season, and though he did, it is hard to think of possibilities of him making it to season three. But does Carrie overlook his part in the Walden assassination because it meant saving her life and just not tell anyone? But as awesome as the opening and closing scenes were, why is the CIA no longer tapping his phone? I know sometimes the show has potholes so big you can drive a semi truck through them, but this is pretty big. Of course Nazir was going to continue with his plan even if a bunch of his lieutenants got captured.
The Voice: I knew it was not going to be a good week when on the results show, the two people I thought (hoped) would go home were the first two saved. And somehow Amanda Brown, who have the two best performances of the week (well solo performance, the Nicholas David / Melanie Martinez duet may have been the most bizarrely beautiful thing ever), was sent packing. Not only that she got voted off right after out-singing Cassadee on Breakaway and even was better than Ne-Yo on his own song.
A lot has been made of the teen girl voting bloc ruining singing shows, but after MacKenzie Bourg went home after the first week of voting, I think it is the bored housewife that is keeping these bland singers around. The finals should be Cassadee and Nicholas, but I have a feeling it will end up being Terry and Trevin. But I guess this final four is still better than last season, but anything without Chris Mann (who inexplicably made over Lindsey Pavao thanks probably to the previously mentioned bored housewife voting bloc) is an upgrade.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs from The Voice by clicking on the artist’s name.
Go On: I am a bit disappointed we did not get more time at the Holiday / End of the World Party. I would have been content with a bottle episode at just the party.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Go On on iTunes.
Parenthood: I cannot remember much of what happened in this week’s episode because all I can remember is the Promo Monkeys daring to suggest Kristina may die next episode. They better be seriously misleading because I do not want to spend all of Tuesday night crying.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Parenthood on iTunes.
Sons of Anarchy: Of course Jax was not going to let Pope kill Tig especially when Pope was responsible for Opie’s death. The only question was how he was going to get out of it. Apparently it meant setting up Clay. So the question to ponder until next season is how is Clay going to avoid the bounty on his head because you know the show is not going to let Clay die unless it is at the hands of Jax.
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.
Survivor: Philippines: Stupid Malcolm had to just go and win Immunity. Very few things are more entertaining than watching someone get voted out with Immunity in their pocket. I have a feeling he would because all the talk before the challenge was about the blindside which always means something would happen to screw it up. Instead they end up voting out… um… who was that guy who got voted up? Did he sneak into the game with the rest of the Loved Ones and hoped no one would notice?
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download Survivor: Philippines on iTunes.
Subugatory: Ryan acting like a wild animal was way too funnier than it had any right to be.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Suburgatory on iTunes.
Nashville: Way to ruin the proposal Promo Monkeys. Okay, of course fake-Tim Tebow was obviously going to say yes. But it is a little weird that the show stole the Fresh Prince of Bel Air plotline from the time Will got fake married (officiated hilariously by Jazz) just so he could have sex with a chick waiting for marriage. Also Gunner is an idiot, I would totally choose the much hotter Hailey over the whiney Scarlett.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.
The Big Bang Theory: I cannot believe Sheldon did not sing Soft Kitty to Amy.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.
Quote of the Week: Believe it or not I’m your best friend in the world right now. (Quinn, Homeland)
Song of the Week: Hello – Lionel Richie (Suburgatory)
Scene of the Week:
Big News of the Week: iTunes 11 Sucks Massively: If there is one mantra that I live by, it was uttered by the great philosopher Garth Adler in the seminal Wayne's World movie: I fear change. And I really hate unnecessary change. Yet from the New Darrin to New Coke companies have continued to try to fix things that were not broken including the latest version of iTunes. I understand the sprucing up of your look, but iTunes claims the new version of the program makes thing simpler but many things are actually made harder, most notably the new search function. Previously whenever you typed something in the search box, it limited your library to songs, artists and albums. Now there is a drop box actually making it harder to find what you are looking for.
And then there are the parts they erroneously left out of the new version. I am furious that the DJ function did not make the upgrade. That was how I listened to my library. I also do not like that you cannot display duplicates anymore, I download a lot of crap, so that was nice thing to have to delete and clean up songs I already have. And for some reason they added songs from the Cloud to my library even though I have never actually used the iTunes Cloud before. iTunes even managed to make the podcast page look more cluttered. Worst of all it is slow, whenever I press “ok” it takes 5-20 seconds to actually do anything. I am not happy. Hopefully this will all get fixed with the next update, until I will probably use Spotify to listen to my Holiday and Best of 2012 playlists.
Preview Picture of the Week:
Revenge: Oh snap, just in case you did not realize how evil Victoria is, she totally set up her own mother. On Thanksgiving. Although it was a little weird that Charlotte was absent at the dinner (granted I did miss the first couple minutes because a local kid was kidnapped). But the Stowaway was a completely worthless flashback even if it set up that the evil dude who bought into the bar is the song of the evil dude who extorted the bar who has come back for… revenge. Actually I did not really care that much about Nolan’s CFO or how Emily met the British dude.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.
Homeland: I had this fear that Quinn just showed up this season so they had someone to be the mole from last season that I did not really care about. Instead it turned out to be part of a super-secret FBI team specializing in killing terrorists (even if they are working for them). I also thought when I learned Mike would be staying over that he would end up hooking up with Mrs. Brody until I realized she would not actually do that with her kids in the other room. Oops. Apparently she did not care. It was like episode one all over again, Mrs. Brody gets naked, Dana is a brat, and Chris is just hanging out. Now the question is what is Abu Nazir’s contingency plan? Or was this his masterplan the whole time or just a diversion?
The Voice: Far and away the most shocking and noteworthy item on The Voice this week were learning Bill Withers was still alive. Who knew? Since Rick Rubin started the craze of producing long forgotten singers like Johnny Cash (also see Jack White/Wanda Jackson, Damon Alburn/Bobby Womack, Tim Armstrong/Jimmy Cliff, Jeff Tweedy/Mavis Staples) I really hope Cee-Lo uses this opportunity to produce a new Bill Withers album which would be his first in over twenty-five year. Way too long.
Really the only other interesting parts of the episode was when Adam Levine went off on The Roxy, Melanie Martinez’s ex-boyfriend (while she looked on in horror), but not Dez Duron who’s performance deserved it the most. A lackluster performance week where everyone managed to be worse than the previous week (with the exception of Trevin) so as part of this week’s Power Ranking, I have made some suggestions of songs to sing.
1. Nicholas David – I was going to suggest Donny Hathaway, but I am about to complain about other singers being complacent, so instead of another seventies soul song, since his Huey Lewis cover was the most bizarrely awesome performance of the season, maybe try the nineties version of The News and sing Hold My Hand by Hootie and the Blowfish.
2. Cassadee Pope – She had her breakout performance last week with an emotional country ballad, so why not try it again with Colder Weather by Zac Brown Band, a song she can actually relate to on multiple levels because not only has she done a lot of touring, so has her boyfriend.
3. Amanda Brown – I’m surprised no has tackled Thinkin Bout You by Frank Ocean this season, and as Amanda showed during Dream On, she definitely can hit that falsetto part. Just do not turn it into a rock song. In fact go the other way and make it just Amanda and an acoustic guitar.
4. Melanie Martinez – She has done pretty much somewhat obscure alt-rock (or as obscure as a song that gets played in a commercial about as often as political ads over the last three months) and old time blues songs, how about combining them with Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth With Money In My Hand by the Primitive Radio Gods (which of course samples BB King).
5. Terry McDermott – I originally thought the Scottish singer should take something out the Irish songbook of U2, but how about bringing him in the new millennium with "45" by The Gaslight Anthem.
6. Trevin Hunte – Trevin tried contemporary music last week and failed miserably and when he went back to old emotional RnB it just started to sound tired. So it is time to think outside the box like Something to Believe In by Poison.
And without Dez Duron, Christina Aguilera gets her third straight last place finish. Hopefully Shakira has a better ear for good singers. I also laughed at Christina assertion that Chris Mann is the most successful contestant ever on The Voice. I would like to see her numbers because Javier Colon, Dia Frampton, and Xenia all charted higher than Chris and he is the only one from season two that has released an album yet, so really no competition . Maybe this is way she always performs so bad on the show because she is completely delusional.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs from The Voice by clicking on the artist’s name.
2 Broke Girls: How could do an episode with all that blood splatter and not make a Dexter reference? Sure they are too poor for premium cable (I do not even remember seeing a television in their apartment), but I am sure Max has figured how to steal it by now.
Survivor: Philippines: I am actually starting to root for Abi-Maria. I got a laugh when she managed to win Immunity and the alliances had to turn on each other. Though has no one ever watched the show before? Of course Probst was going to sell some sort of clue. It is really not a good sign when Abi is the smartest player out there. So you have to wonder if everyone is dumb enough to fall for her fake Immunity Idol.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download Survivor: Philippines on iTunes.
Nashville: It is clear that they need to get Rayna and Juliette in the same room at the same time more often because watching those two go out it passive aggressively is the most entertaining part of the show (and I think this is the first time they crossed path since the first episode). Maybe they should go out on tour together.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.
Free Download of the Week: We Three Kings - Rod Stewart featuring Mary J. Blige (iTunes)
Deal of the Week: 100 Albums for $5: This month’s five dollar albums include albums from The Dave Matthews Band, John Mayer, Lauryn Hill, and Bruce Springsteen.
Video of the Week: I am beginning to think that the Pretty Little Liars promos are more interesting than the actual show because I got more excited watching this that I have the last season or two.
Next Week Pick of the Week: The Walking Dead, Sunday at 9:00 on AMC: I figured last week it would take an entire episode for Rick and his crew to make it to Woodbury and that turned out to be the case after a brief detour into the den of some paranoid dude. But they got there which should lead to an explosive mid-season finale when Rick will (presumably) go head to head with the Governor and (again presumably) get the long overdue Dixon family reunion which I have a feeling will not be all that friendly. And who knows, maybe Andrea will finally get killed off.
This month’s five dollar deal over on Amazon include Norah Jones, Counting Crows, Bruce Springsteen, and Weezer.
– Pistol Annies
bad lip reading video is about as well written as the actual show. The best part is when it turns into a musical.
, just go ahead and do a full Memento parody. Hopefully it was a hint of what is to come and 
jokes, but the promo monkeys already beat me to it with the previews showing an upcoming Liam Neeson joke. Hurmph.
movie: I fear change. And I really hate unnecessary change. Yet from the New Darrin to New Coke companies have continued to try to fix things that were not broken including the latest version of iTunes. I understand the sprucing up of your look, but iTunes claims the new version of the program makes thing simpler but many things are actually made harder, most notably the new search function. Previously whenever you typed something in the search box, it limited your library to songs, artists and albums. Now there is a drop box actually making it harder to find what you are looking for. 
