Saturday, March 31, 2007

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. XIII

Quote of the Week: RAZZLE DAZZLE!!! (Nikki - Lost)

Song of the Week: Read My Mind (Like Rebel Diamonds Mix) - The Killers (Friday Night Lights)

Big News of the Week: Finally Goes Full Scene: Well, sort of. was easily the worst network that offered streaming of their episodes. Their “Big” screen didn’t live up to its title and even though I on a cable line, it sometimes wouldn’t go Big saying I didn’t have the bandwidth and it was a pain if you wanted to skip to a certain scene. But there was something on Lost that I wanted to re-watch and noticed that they have a brand new player that offers Full Screen. So I disagree with ABC’s definition of Full Screen but it is at least bigger than Big. In addition to streaming some of their shows, there is also an internet only show, Voicemail. I haven’t had time to check it out yet, but you can head over to its Official Site and it even has its own MySpace page. You know what else is still available for streaming, The Knights of Prosperity. If you haven’t done so yet, go over to check out the funniest new show of the season over at

Friday Night Lights: After teasing all season with conversations that lasted about a word we finally got a bunch of great Tyra and Landry scenes. It may be time to do one of those extremely lame name mash-ups: Tandry? Landra? Okay, maybe not. But when it comes down to it, this episodes wasn’t just one of the best episodes of Friday Night Lights, it was easily one of the top five best episodes of any show this season. And to be honest the reason why Friday Night Lights didn’t get the coveted Quote of the Week was because I couldn’t decide which my favorite was this week. Really anything between Tyra and Landry, Matt talking about Landry’s “date” or the Taylor’s in the cow pasture would have been worthy. In the action department there was just something extremely jarring (in a good television kind of way) of the juxtaposition of the final moments of the game and the attempted rape. And as an added bonus to an already great episode we get Lyla handling a gun, you really can’t get hotter than that.

I was a little disappointed that Lyla going demolition derby on her dad’s showroom last week wasn’t mentioned at all. You got to imagine there should have been some major fallout from that. Maybe it will be picked up later. And having them playing Voodoo in the state finals sets up a lose-lose situation for the season finale. If the team loses then there is the disappointment that the chump Voodoo gets a ring. And if the Panthers win, then there will be nothing to strive for in a second season. Although I wonder where the second season will start off (I refuse to think there won’t be a second season), will it focus on the football off-season or will it fast forward to the start of the next season? Or could we be following Coach Taylor to college?

Anyway, Mud Bowl goes right into the hunt for best episode of the year with Spit and Eggs, Mars Bars, The Wrap Party, The Christmas Show, Our Cops Are On, and Company Man (did I miss anything?). Check out the latest episode over at

Friday Night Lights on iTunes

Lost: What better way to make up for an episode so inane that saying it jump the shark would be too nice than to start of an episode featuring a nominally hot chick wearing very little clothes on a fake show about strippers that fight crime that features Billy Dee Williams. This episode could easily be the most entertaining episode of the last two seasons. Well in a so bad it’s good kind of way as the episode had a very B-movie feel to it. And the island flash backs had a Saturday Night Live skit with throwing characters we know weren’t there but drops them in there thanks to some blue screening.

Yeah, the episode sputtered at the end especially with the completely useless Not-Henry/Juliet sighting. They seriously trekked across the island just to watch the monitor for less than a minute and they just happen to leave their walkie-talkie. And despite overhearing their intentions to kidnap Jack, Sawyer, and Kate, Paulo didn’t bother to warn them. But it was good to see Arnst and the token hot chick back again. Although I wonder what was with the absence of Michael and Walt? Did the writers just completely leave them out or did one or both of the actors turned down returning?

And I was surprised that everyone is assuming that Nikki and Paulo are dead. Nikki said that the paralysis would wear off in eight hours about eight hours before they were buried and we saw Nikki open her eyes at the end. Really, would them clawing themselves out of their graves be any less plausible than Locke surviving being pushed out a eight story window onto concrete? And it was Locke who said earlier in the episode that things don’t stay buried on the island. Check out the latest episode over at

Lost on iTunes

Survivor: Is it wrong that I was disappointed that no one almost set themselves on fire like Brandon back in Africa? More importantly, is it wrong that I still remember something that happened way back in the Africa season? And it looks like they are going to have the tree person finale again as Jeff mentioned that Rocky was the first member of the jury. I was really hoping they wouldn't do that again. Maybe the worst idea in Survivor history. Check out the latest episode on Innertube.

Survivor on iTunes

Promo of the Week: Tomorrow marks one month until we finally get a new Veronica Mars episode on May 1st so below is the promo for that episode. Seriously, what is better than Ronnie handling a paintball gun? And don’t forget to vote for Veronica Mars at the SOS Poll, there is only one week until the voting period ends.

Pick of the Week: Friday Night Lights, Wednesday, 8:00, NBC: After a five star episode hopefully next week’s episode can continue that tradition as we will hopefully see more Tyra and Landry interaction with the fallout over the attempted rape, see the boys start preparing for the state championship, and it looks like Coach Taylor has made a decision on if he is going to accept the college job offer. And maybe we will finally see the fallout at the Garrity house over Lyla’s bumper car incident.

Download the latest episodes on Amazon Unbox which you can watch on your Tivo DVR's:

Friday, March 30, 2007

Welcome Me Back Like Kotter

Red Gone Wild - Redman

There is no greater moment in the history of Cribs then when Redman demonstrated how you had to rub two wires together to make is doorbell ring. Okay, that may be the only great moment in the history of the worthless series. But what I’m getting at is that in a genre where everyone acts and talks exactly the same Redman is the rare original. He’s always good for a classic verse whenever he shows up on someone else’s song (see Christina Aguilera’s Dirrty) or when he working with a super group like Def Squad. But he was at his best when he paired up with Method Man going back and forth on Blackout!

But that album was released eight years ago and it’s been six years since his last solo album. In the interim, he teamed up with Method Man in other mediums including movies (How High), on the television (Method and Red, yet another great show Fox axed hitting double digit number of episodes) and even were a featured tag team in the video game Def Jam: Vendetta. Finally Redman is back to doing what he does best, and I’m not talking about starting in Chucky slasher flick, no, I’m talking about his new album Red Gone Wild.

On the album, Reggie Noble continues to show his wry humor and love of similes. But the album suffers from being uneven at points with the runtime being way too long at almost an hour and fifteen minutes. Not even the best rappers can fill an album that long with all bangers. The unevenness can also be attributive to the number of different producers that show up, fourteen to be exact, on the twenty different tracks. Surprisingly both Timbaland and his current feud partner Scott Storch both show up behind the boards. Needless to say Timbaland’s track Put it Down was the winner of the two songs on the album.

Had Redman trimmed the fat down to about the regulation fifty minutes, he would have had a pretty decent album. He is at his best when surrounds himself with friends most notably on the best track Walk in Gutta with his Def Squad buddies Erick Sermon and Keith Murray and legend Biz Markie providing the hook. But I wonder if The Funk Doc was at all upset that Keith had the best line on the track, “We get drunk and tongue kiss (expletive deleted) like Flavor Flav”. Similarly Snoop Dogg’s line “I’m the black Jack Tripper” on Merry Jane. But that doesn’t mean Red doesn’t deliver classic lines elsewhere on the album, but you will have to check out the album to hear them.

Song to Download - Walk in Gutta

Red Gone Wild gets a Terror Alert Level: Elevated [YELLOW] on my Terror Alert Scale.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

You Had a Bad Day, You're Taking One Down

Ugg, it's just one of those days where you just want to cue up that cheesy Bad Day song and put it on repeat. I was planning a proper post for today but spent to much time studying for a quiz that I'll be happy to get credit for getting my name right. And if my posts become sporadic over the next week it is because I have a test in the same class and need to make up for the goose egg I laid today plus another test in my other class. The one bright spot to my day is I came across a trailer on YouTube for a movie that looks like will be the greatest movie in cinematic history. Check it out:

On a side note, when do I get my own production company where I can hire Jessica Biel to star opposite of me and grab her breasts? (And to any movie studios out there, yes I have a script.)

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

The Best of R.E.M.

For long time readers to the 9th Green know I love making mix tapes. A subset to this is my Best Of series. I routinely make my own because inevitably they leave off some of my favorite songs on Greatest Hits packages (the worst offender being I’m on Fire being left off of Bruce Springsteen’s). A couple years back I made one for recent Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee R.E.M. and here is the track list to the CD. This CD comes in at 76:56.

1. Fall on Me - Life’s Rich Pageant (1986)
2. The One I Love - Document (1987)
3. It’s the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine) - Document (1987)
4. Stand - Green (1988)
5. Pop Song 89 - Green (1988)
6. Orange Crush - Green (1988)
7. Losing My Religion - Out of Time (1991)
8. Radio Song (with KRS-One) - Out of Time (1991)
9. Man on the Moon - Automatic for the People (1992)
10. Drive - Automatic for the People (1992)
11. Find the River - Automatic for the People (1992)
12. Everybody Hurts - Automatic for the People (1992)
13. Nightswimming - Automatic for the People (1992)
14. Strange Currencies - Monster (1994)
15. You - Monster (1994)
16. What’s the Frequency, Kenneth? - Monster (1994)
17. At My Most Beautiful - Up (1998)
18. Bad Day - In Time: The Best of R.E.M. (2003)
19. The Outsiders (with Q-Tip) - Around the Sun (2004)

If one of your favorite songs of the band is missing feel free to comment on what you would add and or subtract. But be warned, if you suggest Shiny Happy People, you run the risk of being publicly mocked.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Baby You Can't Drive My Car

Eddie Griffin and his carThe first thing I do when I fire up my computer everyday is check out my Bloglines subscriptions and very rarely is there a title that makes me laugh, but when I opened up my ESPN there was the headline Comedian Griffin Wrecks $1.5M Ferrari at Track. Why I found this funny, I’m not sure, but at least he wasn’t hurt so I really didn’t have to feel bad for laughing. But the humor doesn’t stop there, if you open the story, the big block quote for the article is Eddie Griffin saying, “Undercover Brother's good at karate and all the rest of that, but the brother can't drive.” Whenever anyone evokes the third person about themselves is comic gold, and is the may reason why I voted for Bob Dole, but Griffen brought out the unprecedented talking about himself in the third person using a past character. Scooter McGavin thinks that’s brilliant.

In the article, it was also mentioned that there was video footage showing the Ferrari Enzo crashing into a barricade, and Scooter McGavin thought to himself, “Please, oh, please let this footage be on YouTube. Low and behold after Scooter McGavin searched for it, there it was.

And as an added bonus, here’s another of Scooter McGavin’s favorite in recent memory with Peyton Manning’s United Way commercial from the most recent Saturday Night Live. Scooter McGavin’s favorite part is when he uses a kid to pick up a chick. Reportedly during the dress rehearsal, Manning took a stab at Tom Brady when a heckler said Brady had two more rings than him which Manning responded that rings aren’t the only thing Brady will have two more of (as in illegitimate kids). Hopefully that shows up on YouTube sometime, until then here’s the United Way sketch:

Monday, March 26, 2007

The Fight to the Famousest

Surreal Life Fame GamesMuch like slowing down to check out a car crash, I feel oddly compelled to check out all the cheesy VH1 reality show. The granddaddy of them of course being The Surreal Life which had it start of the now defunct UPN but moved to Video Hits One that started the channel’s all reality most of the time scheduling philosophy. And like most reality shows that started earlier this decade, The Surreal Life finally got its own All-Stars edition in the form of The Surreal Life: Fame Games.

The ten Fame Gamers, as host Robin Leach liked to call them, were culled from all six seasons yet surprisingly didn’t include any of the past token reality contestant which every season features as they are the biggest fame mongers of them all. An even bigger surprise was that VH1 staple, Flavor Flav was nowhere to be found. Instead we get some of the more memorable housemates in the series history including Vanilla Ice, Brigitte Nielsen, and Chyna.

The contests themselves were pretty absurd with rules seem to shift and make little sense in the first place. But I guess the show was more about the journey than who actually win. The start of the show started with them dividing the contestants into “The A-List” and “The B-List” even though for many of them, being on “The B-List” would be an upgrade. This was a waste as they were haphazardly thrown back together on “The A-List” shortly after.

The judging for each contest was just as absurd especially when they had celebrity judges like when Kennedy was brought in to figure had the most famous friends with the lowest being eliminated in the only round that didn’t have a “Back to Reality” game to determine it. What was worse is they let Kathy Griffin solely decide who won the $100,000 prize, a prize that actually went to the winner, not charity unlike most celebrity edition. It is something sad that Traci Bingham was the actual winner.

Even though he didn’t win, Vanilla Ice remained the star of the show. It was guaranteed that every episode Ice would do something stupid. It was an added treat whenever he would do one in front of Robin just to see his “I didn’t know I would have to baby-sit during this gig” face. The silliest of his tirade is when he got caught in a gay homosexual scandal during the paparazzi challenge as if anyone would question his sexuality from looking at that picture. And he save the best for last when Ron Jeremy swore on his mother’s grave that he wouldn’t vote Ice to go home only to do just that. Classic. How soon until VH1 gives Ice his own demolition reality show?

The Surreal Life: Fame Games gets a Terror Alert Level on my Terror Alert Scale.

Sunday, March 25, 2007

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. XII

Quote of the Week: It’s not Rabbit-ussin, it’s Robitussin. (Julius, Everybody Hates Chris)

Song of the Week: Endless Love - Lionel Richie and Diana Ross (as sung by guest host Adam Sandler and Don Cheadle, The Late Show with David Letterman)

Big News of the Week: All the shows I watch are on the verge of being canceled: Last week I mentioned the cancellation rumors are already starting and now the “Save Our Shows” polls are popping up and wouldn’t you know it, almost every show I watch popped up on one poll including Friday Night Lights, How I Met Your Mother, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, Supernatural, and Veronica Mars. Head over to the webpage to vote. Now I’m not going to tell you to vote for Veronica Mars, but vote for Veronica Mars.

Pardon the Interruption: Here is one show I never miss. In fact I haven’t missed an episode since it premiered. Unfortunately Tony Kornheiser likes his reality show and three days a week we have to put up his lame American Karaoke ramblings. Another show he occasionally rambles on about is other show I avoid like the plague, Dancing with the Has Been’s and Never Were’s. I bring this up because they featured Apollo Anton Ono and more importantly his partner. If there were a reason why I’d watch that show it would be her. In fact if you know who she is or actually are her, shout me a holla.

How I Met Your Mother: I’m really hoping they break up Ted and Robin by the end of the season because the whole will they or won’t they end up together thing is getting tired considering we already know they aren’t ending up together. One thing not getting tired, Barney, his Top 10 was classic. Check out the latest episode on Innertube.

Friday Night Lights: Somewhat of a weak episode coming out of the hiatus aside from the boys night out at the high school. And I’m beginning to wonder if Riggins ever actually goes to school. Presumably if the kid has school, the high school would also been in session. But the episode did end with an “Oh, snap” moment when Lyla played demolition derby with her dad’s dealership. Check out the latest episode over at

Friday Night Lights on iTunes

Lost: Many point to an episode in season two where the show jumped the shark, for me it was when they killed off the token hot chick. But if the show jumped the shark back then, they need to find a completely new term for the latest episode. I’m not surew what was more inane, that Locke survive a eight story fall after being pushed through a window, Locke blowing up the submarine, or Locke’s father showing up on the island. For a comparison, if killing off the token hot chick was Britney Spears marring Kevin Federline, this past episode was Britney shaving her head. Oh and just when the show revealed the big secret that everyone already assume already last week with Jack and Claire being sibling, now how many seasons until we get the hyped, shocking revelation that the original Sawyer is Locke’s dad? Check out the latest episode over at

Lost on iTunes

Survivor: Since the show was on Wednesday this week and I was already taping Friday Night Lights, I had to watch the episode online this week and the brain trust over at decide to advertise that Anthony was going to be on Survivor Live ruining any suspense on who was getting voted out or winning immunity. Thanks guys. With that said, the immunity challenge has to go up there with one of the coolest in the show’s history and I would love to give that a try sometime. Check out the latest episode on Innertube.

Survivor on iTunes

Smallville: For those keeping track home, the three Zoners this season have been played by two WWF’ers and rapper Bow Wow. Think about that for a moment. And the Lana pregnancy takes another turn. Was Lex behind the miscarriage, and if so why? Hopefully we find out soon than later.

Don't forget to check out my review of The Loop 1.x: Exec by Day, Excess by Night.

Pick of the Week: Lost, Wednesday 10:00 ABC: Okay, so I didn’t care too much about the last episode but at least next week we get a Paulo/Nikki-centric episode. Wait, who are they again?