The 40 Worst Songs of 2013

There are trends every year that quickly become tiring be it ringtone rappers or being told to throw your hands in the year. But this year’s trend may have hit a new low: hashtags. Sure artists taking new internet technology has been since right after Al Gore gifted it to us (who does not have Collio.com in their album collection? Not coincidentally that was his first album not to go platinum). Hashtags popped up everywhere this year, well except actual social networking sites. Other horrible trends this year include Lil’ Wayne trying to pull trash out of history’s trash bin and Miley Cyrus. And you know it has been a bad year for music when Katy Perry, who has landed one song on this list each of the past five years, is absent this year. Here are the worst songs of the past twelve months that managed to be worse than anything on the new Katy Perry album.

1. The Fox (What Does the Fox Say?) - Ylvis

2. Good Time - Paris Hilton featuring Lil Wayne

3. Ready to Go - Limp Bizkit featuring Lil Wayne

4. Say You're Just a Friend - Austin Mahone featuring Flo Rida

5. Work (Expletive Deleted) - Britney Spears

6. Bugatti - Ace Hood featuring Rick Ross and Future

7. Harlem Shake - Baauer

8. Cruise [Remix] - Florida Georgia Line featuring Nelly

9. Timber - Pitbull featuring Ke$ha

10. Perfume - Britney Spears

11. Twerk - Lil Twist featuring Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus

12. I Love It - Icona Pop featuring Charli XCX

13. #TwerkIT - Busta Rhymes featuring Nicki Minaj

14. Work - Iggy Azalea

15. Real and True - Future featuring Miley Cyrus and Mr. Hudson

16. #thatPOWER - will.i.am featuring Justin Bieber

17. I Wish - Cher Llyod featuring T.I.

18. One Way or Another (Teenage Kicks) - One Direction

19. Lolly - Maejor Ali featuring Juicy J and Justin Bieber

20. Feel This Moment - Pitbull featuring Christina Aguilera

21. Love More - Chris Brown featuring Nicki Minaj

22. Woman's World - Cher

23. We Can't Stop - Miley Cyrus

24. Wild for the Night - A$AP Rocky featuring Skrillex and Birdy Nam Nam

25. Fine China - Chris Brown

26. This Is Gospel - Panic! At the Disco

27. 23 - Mike Will Made-It featuring Miley Cyrus, Wiz Khalifa, and Juicy J

28. I'm Out - Ciara featuring Nicki Minaj

29. High School - Nicki Minaj featuring Lil Wayne

30. Heart Attack - Demi Lovato

31. Applause - Lady Gaga

32. Holy Grail - Jay-Z featuring Justin Timberlake

33. Wu-Tang Forever - Drake

34. Banga! Banga! - Banga! Banga! - Austin Mahone

35. Best Song Ever - One Direction

36. Wrecking Ball - Miley Cyrus

37. No New Friends - DJ Khaled featuring Drake, Rick Ross, and Lil Wayne

38. Miss Jackson - Panic! At the Disco featuring Lolo

39. Counting Stars - OneRepublic

40. Chloe (You're the One I Want) - Emblem3

Nothings Gonna Wake Me Now Cause Im a Slave to the Sound

Lorde was not the only highly buzzed about new artist to release an album last week (see my review: I'm Kind of Over Being Told to Throw My Hands in the Air). Much like Lorde, Haim built their buzz with critically adored EP and plenty of high profile endorsements (in the case of Haim wide ranging artists from Rihanna to Mumford & Sons have express support) but unlike Lorde the three sisters of Haim (and one unseen male drummer) have also build a reputation of a great live act playing basically every major festival over the past year.

Unlike Lorde whose debut album was made up almost entire of new songs, Haim does recycle half the songs on their full length first album Days Are Gone from their previous EP’s, whether this is a good thing or not depend on if you already bought the EP’s or not. Even as a listener it is a bit disappointing that much of the album is not new. But to steal the NBC’s slogan from decade, if you are just hearing of Haim for the first time, the songs are new to you.

If you are new to Haim, there is a reason why everyone from Rihanna to Mumford and Sons are championing the trio; they check almost every musical box you can think off. The first thing I heard was Falling (which is also the first track on the album) which harkens back to Southern California rock of the seventies like Fleetwood Mac, a comparison that deepens as each sister trade off lead vocals, but they also combine their voices that are reminiscent of nineties RnB. They go deep on RnB with songs like Go Deep with its penetrating bass worthy of any slow jam from two decades ago. There is also a pop sensibility of that other sibling band Hanson, but since all the members of Haim are legally able to buy beer, there is not an underlying cheesiness to them.

Haim’s influences sometime get too prevalent. Most notably on the first new single off the album The Wire which completely lifted another seventies So-Cal band The Eagles guitar riff from Heartache Tonight. And on Forever, it is hard not to hear the synthesizers from New Order’s Bizarre Love Triangle. It is a fine line between homage and stealing and Haim toes the line a little too close a couple times on Days Are Gone.

For those familiar with Haim’s previous EP’s, the group gets weird and dark on some of the newer tracks on the album which makes it more diverse than the very homogeneous Pure Heroine that Lorde put out. My Song 5 sound more like something you would hear on a Dirty Projectors album than from the group that put out the Forever EP. While Let Me Go is a menacing track to that could have been a hit on alternative rock stations back in the nineties.

Last Tuesday was the deadline for the 2014 Grammy awards which is probably why Haim and Lorde (and a few other artists) dropped their album on Monday. Both are angling for a Best New Artists nomination, which should be a lock for both, along with Kacey Musgraves as well as maybe Capital Cities, Macklemore & Ryan Lewis (assuming they are eligible, the rules for the category are fuzzy so not so new acts like Imagine Dragons and Kendrick Lamar may also be in the mix even though they do not seem very "new"). And the last two entrants may be the ones to beat next January, being fresh in a voters mind is usually a good thing. Lorde may have the inside track because of the smash Royals but Days Gone By is a much more fun album.

Song to Download – Falling

Days Are Gone gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

The Ten Most Anticipated Albums of Fall 2013

It has been an abysmal year for music. In the first eight months there were only four marquee albums released by Daft Punk, Justin Timberlake, Kanye West, and Jay-Z. Except Yeezus bombed, Magna Carta... Holy Grail and The 20/20 Experience will probably end up being the two best selling albums of the year but were still disappointing, and Random Access Memories has yet to garner a second hit. Just think that the next biggest release this year was the Fall Out Boy comeback. Was anyone even hoping for a Fall Out Boy reunion twelve months ago?

What is worse, the music industry has yet to create a breakout artist this year. Just think back to this time last year when Gotye, Fun., and Carley Rae Jepsen all had massive hits while The Lumineers and Of Monsters and Men were still building steam. The closest thing the music industry has to a breakout star this year is Anna kendrick. No shots at Cups because it is extremely catchy but it is sad that an acapella song by an actress from movie released in December of last year is still hovering around the iTunes top ten in September. With that said, I really hope Anna capitalizes on the success and goes into the studio to create a full version of No Diggity. At any rate, rumors are there is a Pitch Perfect Christmas album coming our way this winter.

Yeah the year in music has been extremely bad this year, but hold off declaring that 2013 has overtaken 1999 as the worst year in music ever. Usually it is hard for me to come up with five albums to make up my Most Anticipated Albums list each quarter, but this Fall I could have easily come up with a top twenty this time around and that is not even using the albums that are just rumored to be coming out sometime in the next four months like U2 and The Black Keys. Although I hope all of those marquee albums named in the TBA category hold off their albums until early next year so 2014 does not start off as abysmal as this year. Here are some albums that are scheduled to come out over the next four months. Click on the album title or art to pre-order on Amazon and the artists name to go to their iTunes page.

1. Magpies and Dandelions – The Avett Brothers (October 15): After putting out steller folk albums on their own, The Avett Brothers hooked up with uber-producer Rick Rubin for their best album to date, I and Love and You four years ago. Just last year, they collaborated again for another good album The Carpenter. So my hopes are high when they hooked up for the third time with a new batch of songs recorded during The Carpenter sessions.

2. Wise Up Ghost – Elvis Costello & The Roots (Tomorrow): When The Roots signed up as The Late Night house band, I thought it was slow down their output, but they have managed to put out as much, if not more music than ever. And it has opened them up to unexpected collaborations, The Dirty Projectors, Jim James, and Joanna Newsome have appeared on their albums and The Roots did a whole album with John Legend. And now maybe their weirdest collaboration yet with Elvis Costello. And like the previously mentioned collaborations, this one weirdly works.

3. Pure Heroine – Pure Heroine - Lorde (September 30): If you had at the start of the year a sixteen year old from New Zealand who spouts anti-materialism anthems as the breakout star of 2013, you would be raking it in right now. And while Miley is off twerking, Lada Gaga is trying to hard to be shocking, Katy is recycling songs, and Britney trying too use profanities again to jump start her career, the pop world really needs Lorde right now. Her five song EP was great and though Royals will pop up on the full length debut everything she has done so far has been great. Seriously, she even made a song off of Yeezus listenable.

4. From Here to Now to You – Jack Johnson (Tomorrow): At this point, Jack is not changing anyone's mind, and the new album will not be changing anyone's mind. But if you are already on the Jack Johnson bandwagon (like me, I own all of his albums), he has put together another set of songs that will help you remember the summer as the days start getting shorter.

5. Days Are Gone – Haim (September 30): This fall is so jammed packed with music, the two highest profiled debuts arrive on the same day (not so coincidentally, I believe this is the last day to be eligible for the 2014 Grammy Award which is why so much music is being released on a Monday instead of the usual Tuesday; and Haim and Lorde are pretty much a lock for Best New Artist along with Kacey Musgraves with the other two slots taken by Capital Cities and... um... could Anna Kendrick really get the last spot? Actually the Grammys will probably not realize 2 Chainz has been around for a decade and give him the final spot). Like Lorde, Haim put out a solid EP which mixed southern California pop with nineties RnB and somehow makes it sound awesome. Listening to Heartache Tonight biting first single, their full length debut will be more of the same (but unlike Lorde, much of their EP shows up on Days Gone By).

6. Lightning Bolt – Pearl Jam (October 14): After some unremarkable albums durning the late ninties to the early 00's, Pearl Jam has had a bit of resurgence with their last two album. They go full agro on first single Mind Your Manners which brings up memories of Spin the Black Circle off their best album. Here is hoping Lightning Blt turns out to be their best album yet, or at the very least the best since Vitology.

7. The Marshall Mathers LP 2 - Eminem (November 5): I cannot say I have ever anticipated an Eninem album, but that all chanced with the release of Berserk and word that the album is being co-produced by Rick Rubin and Dr. Dre. As you can tell by the cameo in the video Rubin was responsible for the beat, the first he has done since 99 Problems a decade ago (both sample a Billy Squire which make me wonder if Rubin will try to resurrect his career Johnny Cash style in the near future). No word of Eminem goes full retro on the whole album, but I certainly hope so.

8. New – Paul McCartney (October 15): Another artist I usually do not get too excited for, because aside from Spies Like Us, is there any other solo songs from Paul McCartney to get excited about? But for his next album, the former Beatles has teamed up with probably the best new producer of the past decade, Mark Ronson whose retro soul style helped launch the careers of Amy Winehouse, Lily Allen, and Adele.

9. Speak a Little Louder - Diane Birch (October 15): As Ronson ushered in a new age of retro female British singers, American Diane Birch was unfortunately ignore with her retro leaning debut Bible Belt which was one of my favorite debuts from last decade. From what I have heard, the follow up is a bit darker with influences from eighties shoe-gazers. Hopefully the whole album is as good as the first one.

10. To All the Girls… - Willie Nelson (October 15): Willie Nelson is jumping on the duets bandwagon, but as the title suggests, he is just singing with his favorite ladies including featuring Dolly Parton, Mavis Staples, Sheryl Crow, Loretta Lynn, Wynonna Judd, Rosanne Cash, Alison Krauss, Miranda Lambert, Tina Rose, Carrie Underwood, Emmylou Harris, Norah Jones, Secret Sisters, Brandi Carlile, Lily Meola, Shelby Lynne, Melonie Cannon, and Paula Nelson.

I put together a Spotify playlist of the first singles off of the albums listed above which you can listen to at right while you peruse seventy other albums coming out this fall that should at the very least be worth a spin on Spotify.

Last Week
The Electric Lady – Janelle Monáe
AM – Arctic Monkeys
Feels Like Home – Sheryl Crow
Kiss Land – The Weeknd
B.O.A.T.S. 2# Metime – 2 Chainz
Dynamics – Holy Ghost!
Now, Then and Forever – Earth, Wind and Fire
Say That to Say This – Trombone Shorty
Sound System - The Clash

Tomorrow
New Constellation – Toad the Wet Sprocket
In Rolling Waves – The Naked and Famous
Spreading Rumours - Grouplove
Battle Maximus - GWAR
Bookmarks – Five for Fighting
MGMT – MGMT
Sun Will Rise – Animal Years

September 24

Mechanical Bull – Kings of Leon
The Diving Board – Elton John
The Last Ship - Sting
Seasons Of Your Day – Mazzy Star
Build Me Up From Bones – Sarah Jarosz
Negativity – Deer Tick
Bones of What You Believe – CHVRCHES
Wishbone – Oh Land
Shout! - Gov't Mule
Sammy Hagar and Friends – Sammy Hagar
My Brothers Keeper – K-Ci and JoJo
Metallica Through The Never (Music From The Motion Picture)
In Utero (3CD+DVD Super Deluxe Edition) – Nirvana

October 1
VII – Blitzen Trapper
Blur the Line – Those Darlins
B-Room – Dr. Dog
I'll Find A Way – The Blind Boys of Alabama
Innocents – Moby
Unvarnished – Joan Jett and The Blackhearts
Lucky Numbers - Dave Stewart

October 8
Back to Forever – Lissie
Mountains of Sorrow, Rivers of Song – Amos Lee
Bitter Rivals – Sleigh Bells
Tin Star – Lindi Ortega
You Can't Make Old Friends - Kenny Rogers
Frame By Frame – Cassadee Pope
High Rise – Stone Temple Pilots with Chester Bennington
Melophobia – Cage the Elephant
My Name Is My – Pusha T

October 15
Let's Be Still – The Head and the Heart
Make A Move - Gavin DeGraw
Static – Cults
No Poison No Paradise – Black Milk
Mary Christmas – Mary J. Blige
Unplugged: Expanded and Remastered (2xCD+DVD) - Eric Clapton

October 22
Smoke and Mirrors – Brett Dennen
Fade Away - Best Coast

October 29
Reflektor – Arcade Fire
Night Time, My Time - Sky Ferreira
Get There – Minor Alps (Juliana Hatfield and Matthew Caws of Nada Surf)
Wrapped in Red – Kelly Clarkson
Recharged - Linkin Park

November 5
Magic Hour - Luscious Jackson
Mantangi – M.I.A.
Avril Lavigne – Avril Lavigne
Loved Me Back To Life - Céline Dion
Miami Pop Festival - The Jimi Hendrix Experience

November 12
Black Panties - R. Kelly
Under the Covers, vol. 3 – Matthew Sweet and Susanna Hoffs
November - Grace and Tony
Inside Llewyn Davis Soundtrack
Let It Snow: A Holiday Collection - Jewel

December 3
Love, Marriage and Divorce – Toni Braxton and Kenny "Babyface" Edmonds

TBD
blackSUMMERSnight – Maxwell
The Art of War: World War III - Bone Thugs-n-Harmony
Fading West - Switchfoot
Beck
Better Than Ezra
Beyoncé
The Black Keys
Common
Danielle Bradbery
Ed Sheeran
Lily Allen
Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers
U2

And of course I have to mention the obligatory this may be the quarter that Dr. Dre finally releases Detox.