Showing posts with label Pretty Little Liars. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pretty Little Liars. Show all posts

Sunday, July 02, 2017

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 7/2/2017

Claws: Oh my goodness, that opening scene. Oh my goodness. Oh yeah, and that closing. I was spit balling that Roller was not really dead last week (the actor’s name is in the main credits so it is not entirely surprising he is not dead), but I never thought that Desna would be in on it. She did try to drown him, he did smack her around, she lit him on fire. I mean, dude got shot by Virginia. Or did he? Did she miss, did Roller and Desna plan this and loaded blanks in the gun hoping she would stick around and “save” Desna. The show has a lot of explaining to do next episode.
You can download Claws on iTunes.

Preacher: It hated the first season finale with a fiery passion. The opener was alright, but that angel killing himself montage just seemed to go on forever.

I’m Dying Up Here: Holy Richard Pryor siting! Yeah, it is weird seeing real people show up on a program like this. Makes me wonder if these characters we are watching are real people who just never made it, based on real people who went on to make it and the names were changed for legal reasons, or just completely made up.

Casual: Isn’t Tommy running an Air BnB? I have to imagine there are rules against having sex with your tenants.
You can stream Casual on Hulu.

Pretty Little Liars: Well, twin Spencer as AD was a more sensible reveal than A being Alison’s brother who ended up being CeCe Drake which made absolutely no sense. Though I still do not understand why Wren did not try to connect Spencer and her twin when he found out.
Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Sunday, June 25, 2017

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 6/25/2017

Claws: The South really knows how to do a funeral. Up here we got the silly car processional. I want one of those New Orleans marching bands leading my death match (I will pass on Roller’s stripper brigade though). But goodness this show is much better than I expected. That opening scene was great, the running on the beach was hilarious. But that they only found Roller’s grills and random body parts really send up my Spidey senses. As I always say, if you do not see the body, they probably are not dead (and even then I may not be convinced). Sure dude almost drowned, got shot in the head, sank in a pool for probably minutes, got doused with gasoline, set a flame, and pushed out into the bayou. On the other hand, what exactly happened to the other body in the boat?
You can download Claws on iTunes.

Fear the Walking Dead: Last week everyone wondered just how Daniel survived the fire from last season. Except the episode started with him fleeing a zombie with a burn on his leg. Later he said he did not know how he survived. Meh.
You can download Fear the Walking Dead on iTunes

I’m Dying Up Here: I thought they set the show in the seventies so they could be as racist and sexist as they could but who would have guessed it was a puppet who crossed the line? And then kept going? But oh my, dude cannot continue being a comedian after that haircut, he looks like an accountant now.

Casual: Wait, Leon and the receptionist? Did I miss something or were they keeping that from the audience as well as everyone else on the show?
You can stream Casual on Hulu.

Pretty Little Liars: I completely forgot that they yet to reveal who killed Charlotte. And that was mostly lame. Mona did it… sort of, I guess it was self-defense? And so AD just ends the game because it? She does not even punish Mona? I guess it is not the end end because we still have the two hour finale.
Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

The Challenge: Champs vs. Pros: I understand why they do the thirty-five percent of your weight thing, but man, that really does put the biggest guys at a massive disadvantage. And I do not understand the stagigy of the eating challenge, I would have eaten all the deserts first and only go to the other tables as a last resort.
You can download The Challenge: Invasion of the Champions on iTunes.

Sunday, June 18, 2017

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 6/18/2017

Orphan Black: I needed that "previously on" segment to be longer. This show just got way too complicated over the years.
You can download Orphan Black on iTunes.

Fear the Walking Dead: Well preppers are an interesting character study in an actual apocalypse, but has society ended that quickly? They were on a boat and in Mexico for maybe a month and society has already fallen? And didn’t the Mexican daddy burn up last season? I guess this could be a hallucination. And where is his daughter? She is still in the credits.
You can download Fear the Walking Dead on iTunes

I’m Dying Up Here: Oh my, Let’s Make a Deal. I was going to say how seventies, but I think there was a reboot recently with Wayne Brady as host. But what a horrible show.

Casual: Oh Leon, you need to be on this show more. Oh course you are into Magic: The Gathering. And oh hey, Judy Greer: always a plus.
You can stream Casual on Hulu.

Pretty Little Liars: Last week when Hannah and Caleb got engaged, following Aria and Ezra’s engagement (still icky) and Emily and Allison bizarrely having a kid together, I felt bad for Spencer whose one night stand with a detective has gotten worse and worse. But of course Toby came back this week so they could do one huge Lairs’ sex montage. Le sigh. Only two more episode until I can start wearing my I Watched Every Episode of Pretty Little Liars and all I Got Was This Stupid T-Shirt t-shirt.
Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

The Challenge: Champs vs. Pros: Oh wow, I actually thought Kameron maybe could win that challenge by himself. But poor Ashley and Lolo, going into every elimination this season.
You can download The Challenge: Invasion of the Champions on iTunes.

The Handmaid’s Tale: So why exactly are they taking Offred? The easy answer is that it is because of the stunt she pulled in the stoning. But that was everyone who refused to throw a stone, they are not going to round up all the Handmaids are they? It could be because of the package, which was kind of lame, just a bunch of letters. There could be a very small chance the resistance is poising as the black van people. But my best working theory is that the driver, who is part of the eye, is getting who he thinks is his baby mama out of a dangerous situation. Wherever Offred ends up going, I just hope she runs into Rory Gilmore, my one complaint is she got hauled away early in the season and we never got to see what happened to her. And with a season of great musical cues, American Girl was another one. Remember America is not much of a thing anymore, but Offred but the show reminds us as the show goes on hiatus that Offred is still an American girl ay heart.

The show has been cruel since the beginning but they really racheted that up for the finale. Making the Handmaids stone one of their own (but “don’t throw too hard” was a great line), the Waterfords were equally harsh to each other. But number one on that list was Mrs. Waterford driving Offred over to where Offred’s daughter is being kept, Waterford talked to the daughter within sight but out of earshot completely out of spite. But here is the thing: that is secretly a gift because now Offred knows where her daughter is. I can imagine Offred will find her way there in season two.
You can stream The Handmaid's Tale on Hulu.

Sunday, April 23, 2017

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 4/22/2017

Once Upon a Time: Was this our first look at Tigerlily on the show? They ruined Peter Pan so much it is hard to remember. But Emma being able to bring Hook back to Storybrooke seemed silly. He had some curse that preventing him from getting back there so what was so different about the door Emma created?
You can download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Billions: Does a billionaire really a VR experience with a doomsday bunker when he can build one that is real and probably better? How about a bunker on the moon or Mars? But what exactly do you get a man who can buy anything?

The Voice: Someone mentioned their team on The Voice App and I thought, oh yeah, I have one of those but I have not even looked at it since the Battle Rounds. I was shocked to see my team was still in tack (Lauren, TSoul Chris, Lilli, and Jesse). Usually I am lucky to have two people make it to the Top 12. Aliyah was the big shock getting voted through over Casi (though I think Blake would have saved her anyway). Vanessa was another big shock that night, she was singing a crappy EDM song and still made it in over the overhyped Stephanie and Partridge legacy Jack. The big shocks Tuesday came with the coaches saves, I figured Gwen would save either Quizz because of her creepy obsession with teenagers or the much hyped JChosen. Instead she went with the easily forgettable Troy who has to be most likely to get booted first next week. Then I thought Adam would save one of his rockers but instead boring teen singer Mark who is most likely to be in the bottom two every week yet inexplicably saved by Twitter up until the Semi-Finals. Ugg. But anyway, here is my top 12 Power Rankings:

1. Lilli Passero
2. Lauren Duski
3. Chris Blue
4. Aliyah Moulden
5. TSoul
6. Vanessa Ferguson
7. Brennley Brown
8. Troy Ramey
9. Stephanie Rice
10. Jesse Larson
11. Hunter Plake
12. Mark Isaiah

Harlots: You know what they say, a party never truly starts until someone brings a goat. And poor Lucy, again stuck the war between her sister and her fiancé. That final song was so sad.

Pretty Little Liars: Should I remember who Holden is. Wasn’t the murdered cop named Detective Holden? And please more Ali and Paige mean women scenes.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTuness.

The Challenge: Invasion of the Champions: Do you believe in highly unlikely’s!!! Camilla over Laurel. Wow. And Camillia is the only Champion girl left. Double wow.
You can download The Challenge: Invasion of the Champions on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: So The Patriot is dead dead right? Dead in the framework is dead in real life. That is not to say they cannot bring him back somehow I guess.
Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Survivor: Game Changers: Oh my, two hours is just too much. And it was turning out to be a horrible two hours: Debbie grinding on Cirie, Tai streaking, Hali getting booted, and then Andrea almost went home. Instead Ozzy got the boot so it was not all bad. A lot of bad game play this week. When Cirie was debating bringing in Michayla to her alliance and get rid of Hali instead, I had to wonder, why not bring in both and then vote out someone like Brad or Sierra? And did these people really think Hali was smart enough to find an Idol? Really, she could have had come in handy for Cirie’s alliance at the second Tribal. But before that Zeke made a horrible move breaking from what looked like a very tight alliance with Andrea. So Andrea tells Zeke not to tell Debbie her plan, Zeke tells Debbie and they should target Andrea, Debbie than says forget than and then conspires to get rid of Ozzy and does not even let Zeke in on the plan as he is the only one who votes for Aubrey for no apparent reason (did we miss a scene where they told them they were splitting votes just in case Andrea had an Idol and that is why Zeke voted for Aubrey?). So now Debbie does not trust Zeke, Sierra does not trust Zeke, Andrea is still in the game and gunning for Zeke (on the flip side, Andrea will have to go back to camp after saying, “see you never” in her vote). So note to future players, if Andrea tells you to not do something do not do it.

You can download Survivor: Game Changers on iTunes.

The Blacklist: Wait, Red’s cleaner used to be Lizzy’s babysitter? Huh? But really, I am not sure we really needed an entire episode devoted to her.
You can download The Blacklist on iTunes.

Monday, January 02, 2017

The Seven Most Anticipated Events of 2017

2016 sucked. Massively. We lost too many people who shaped my childhood to named. I have not been as ashamed of my Best Songs of the year’s list since 1999. Music was so bad last year; somehow Justin Beiber landed a Best Album nomination. Really, since music was so bad last year and so many great artists, died, the Grammy’s this year should just be a three hour tribute show. In some years, Leon Russell or Leonard Cohan would have gotten a lengthy tribute but they may just get stuffed in the In Memorium package this year as neither are in the top five this year (and that is not even counting David Bowie or Glen Frye who were paid tribute at last year’s ceremony). Oh yeah, and we also witnessed the worst presidential election in my lifetime, probably ever. Also as hit musical Hamilton taught us, at least no one is participation in duels. Instead we had dudes bragging about the size of his penis at a televised debate, bragging about being able to molest women, claiming political opponent’s father was involved in the JFK assassination, openly admitted to wanting to have sex with his daughter, promising to lock up his political opponents, and siding with Russia over our CIA. And that is just the guy that won. But as the great philosopher Adam Duritz one said, there is reason to believe that this year will be better than the last. So with that said, here are seven things to look forward to in 2017.

7. Obligatory Superhero Movie Mention: Superhero movies have been a mainstay on my Most Anticipated lists for a while now but honestly I am getting a bit worn out. I have had the Batman v. Superman blu-ray sitting on my desk for about a month now unopened, and I am two movies behind on the Marvel movies. Basically I did not watch one Superhero movie that was released in 2016. I am sure I will eventually and it may not happen this year, but eventually I am sure I will get around to watching Logan (March 3), Guardians of the Galaxy 2 (May 5), Wonder Woman (June 2), Spider-Man: Homecoming (July 7), Thor: Ragnorok (November 3), and Justice League (November 17). And really, you might as well put Star Wars: Episode VIII (December 15) in this category too.

6. Kong: Skull Island (March 10), The Mummy (June 9): Superhero’s are no longer the only films getting their own cinematic universes, now other movie studios are getting in on the action. Kong: Skull island takes place in the same universe as 2014’s Godzilla. Although that is a pretty limited universe because it is just the two large mutant animals that will not even appear on screen together until 2020. As lackluster the concept is, it is a pretty impressive cast: Tom Hiddleston, Brie Larson, Samuel L. Jackson, and John Goodman. Universal is getting a bit more ambitious, rebooting the very first shared cinematic universe with its monster movies, first up, The Mummy. If all goes well, there will also be movies featuring Frankenstein's monster (starring Javier Bardem), Count Dracula, the Wolf Man, the Creature from the Black Lagoon, the Invisible Man (starring Johnny Depp), and Bride of Frankenstein.

5. A Few Good Men Live!(?): Hiding at the bottom of NBC’s press release for their upfronts last year was one line about adapting the Aaron Sorkin play, a break from their string of live musicals. Supposedly it was coming “early 2017.” Well here we are in early 2017 and I have not heard anything about it since. does have a page for it and it just says, “coming soon.” Hopefully they are just making sure they are getting it right and not just quietly forgotten about it because I am much more interested in it than the Jennifer Lopez starring Bye Bye Birdie.

4. The Ends of Orphan Black and Pretty Little Liars: Two show on the opposite of the quality spectrum are ending this year. After introducing one of the more adventurous ideas in television history, Orphan Black will be coming to a close. Here is hoping there is an Alison spin-off into a bad CBS sitcom. Then there is Pretty Little Liars which stretched a murder mystery further than any show before. I long ago lost track of how many different A’s there have been. And yet, I was never able to stop watching.

3. Prisoner - Ryan Adams (February 17): In the first decade of this century, Ryan Adams put out ten albums, this decade he has only put out two proper albums and none since 2014 (obviously I am not counting his Taylor Swift cover album a “proper” album. After his output last decade, three years is a long time sso hopefully he has a lot of great tunes lined up and no Rihanna covers.

2. Powerless (February 2) – The last couple years saw multiple superhero shows hit the small screen but this current season will only see one network superhero show, and that does not even star someone with powers, hence the title. (Do not fret traditional funny book fans, Legion premieres next week on FX, the ongoing Netflix shows, and ABC has already greenlighted Inhumans to premiere this fall as well as the return of Young Justice to some yet announced channel or possibly streaming service). Instead the show will follow incurrence agents living in a superhero world that sees city blocks destroyed regularly. I cannot wait to not watch this show when it gets demoted to The CW in the fall.

1. On second thought about 2017…

Sunday, September 04, 2016

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 9/4/16

Ray Donovan: So the Russian gangster wanted to meet the movie star because he beat up a hundred Russians in a movie just to beat him up? That is some Kim Jong Il stuff. At least they killed off Lisa Bonet, that storyline went on way too long. Now just what exactly is Ray going to get from him that will satisfy the Russian? Is take a dive too obvious?

Roadies: Bad form by Taylor Swift not to show up to the memorial for her former tour manager. And Eddie Vedder can show up but not Mike McCreedy, I was hoping for a showdown between him and Machine Gun Kelly. Oh well, maybe in season two… if there is a season two. There used to be a joke, if you were on Showtime, you would run an automatic seven seasons. But recently they have been pretty trigger happy; they canceled all their comedies, including Happyish after one season. It was announced Penny Dreadful was canceled with a “The End” place card at the end of the third season finale. Last month Ray Donovan was renewed, but no word on this show. But Roadies did not have a “The End” before the credits so it seems like the show thinks there will be more when you end with Reg running back to Kelly-Anne (natch). I guess if there is a second season, the band will not actually split up and we will get an European tour. I kind of hope everyone gets hired by My Morning Jacket just so there is more Jim James.

BrainDead: Finally someone pointing out what is wrong with politics, both parties have been taken over by extremist who would rather burn down the government than compromise on anything. These politicians need to stop listening to the loudest people and start doing what is the best for everyone again.
You can download BrainDead on Amazon Instant Video, free with a Prime membership.

The Strain: When the premiere started up, I had to ask myself, did I actually like this show or have I been hatewatching it. As the episode progressed, I remembered it was kind of both. All the vampire stuff is scary but, goodness, these characters are morons and the kid is really annoying. It was more of the same with the new season especially with Gus and his mother. C’mon, how did he manage to get a straitjacket on her without getting bitten?

Pretty Little Liars: I am not sure what was more awkward, Spencer kissing the cop while collecting evidence at her house, or when she asked to kiss Toby one last time. But anyway. After the blood test we learn Noel was not Mary’s kid, that meant it had to be Jenna right? It certainly would make more sense she was Mary’s kid and AD than Charlotte being the original A. But nope, Mary Drake saved Spencer and told her she was her mother. Wait, what!?! Didn;tr we already have paternity issues with Spencer? So we learned Spencer’s father was not really her father, but instead Papa DiLarentas, but her mother is not even her mother too? Again, what!?!
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Mr. Robot: So we got the backstory of Elliot going to prison and it was the Ashley Madison guy. I was hoping we would get more of Craig Robinson and how that went down in reality. So did he really just invite Elliot into his office, play chess, and as Elliot was leaving, the FBI stormed his office? Alrighty. But next week it looks like we are going to get what I have hoped for since late last season with Mrs. American Psycho going face to face with Elliot. I have thought since their first meeting she knows a lot more than she lets on, hopefully we will finally learn if that is true.
You can download Mr. Robot on iTunes.

Sunday, August 28, 2016

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 8/28/16

Ray Donovan: There seems to be a pacing problem this season as they are having trouble balancing between the Russian storyline and the boxer. Two episode, Ray kills a Russian and I think, well the other Russians will not like that. Except it was not brought up once last week. Then finally someone found the body this week. And just as things started to get ramped up, they had to slip in a scene with the boxer and his crazy sister. But at least the Russian plot got interesting. Does Ray get the niece back to save Avi or sacrifice him? (Or a third option where both the niece and Avi are safe?)

Fear the Walking Dead: Has there ever been a more boring season premiere than this? I was actually rooting for the dogs.
You can download Fear the Walking Dead on iTunes.

Roadies: Wait, does Machine Gun Kelly have suspenders tattooed on his body? Weird. But anyway. But man, did they really bring Phil back just to kill him? Should have stayed with Taylor Swift.

BrainDead: I do not care if it did not turn out to be true, Ramona Flowers has forever been tainted by having sex with Michael Moore. The dream nightmare sequence will forever be seared into my brain. And I thought the bug sex scene last week was the worst thing I would ever see on the show.
You can download BrainDead on Amazon Instant Video, free with a Prime membership.

Murder in the First: I have talked about the rise of incest on television considering it is one of the last taboo left. But up to this point is has been brother-sister relationship, all of which have been creepy, but oh my goodness, did this show really do a consensual father-daughter relationship? Eww. Then there was Hildy talking about the time her brother got a bit handsy because telling her partner it was a line because saying she was a good liar. I am not sure if it was the writer’s intent, but I was left wondering if her I am a good liar line was about the story she told the pop star or telling her partner she was lying.
You can download Murder in the First on iTunes.

The Voice: I was not expecting much, but I had to bail quite early on the preview episode right around the time Miley Cyrus opened her mouth. The actual person who sang was not that much better though I did like they went straight to the singing, no super sappy background. I did check out the other person they featured who was a big giant meh. The first person picked Alicia and the second picked Miley so this was clearly a showcase on the new coaches not the talent. But that is ever increasing point of the show. Each episode used to end with the best season, but the last three of four seasons, it seems to end with mediocre singers at best but a lot of coach banter and fighting. But if that was the best person Miley got on her team it will be a long season and she will rival Shakira season six as the worst collection of talent on a team ever. Then I had to skip the coaches singing Dream On because I have no desire to hear anyone sing that song on this show other than Amanda Brown.

Pretty Little Liars: I was hoping Hanna would go Liam Neeson this week and after a pitiful attempt at drugging Noel, boom goes the dynomite at the end the episode with a baseball bat. Awesome. I cannot wait to see what goes wrong with the interrogation.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Casual: Interesting they chose not to end the season like they started the series, at their father’s funeral, but I guess they ended the first season in a church so I guess they did not want to go back to that well. Instead we end with Valerie moving back in with her ex-husband. Alrighty, Hopefully the side piece did not get too comfortable, or pregnant, I thought they we going through fertility procedures. But really, for a show whose title would lead you to believe it is about casual sex, there was a lot of talk of death this season and relationships that are moving out of the “causal” category.
You can watch Casual on Hulu.

Mr. Robot: And we are back to starting episodes with flashbacks that wink and nod but do not really mean much. So the Muslim chick and fat guy who spent most of a season and a half met in a coffee show, presumably owned by the same guy Elliot took down in the first episode, but not the one with his illegal operation, one with crappy wi-fi. Of course this begs the question, when is Elliot going to run into him in prison? Back in current time, Darla kills a chick… alrighty. So is her boy toy going to give her up as the person who took his gun? Instead, Dom pulls in the fat guy. But really, I think it is safe to assume that everyone can agree the best scene this week was Angela singing Everybody Wants to Rule the World even if it was a bit on the nose. Speaking of the karaoke bar, holy Duck Phillips sighting! He has to be tied into the story somehow, you do not bring in Duck Philips just to creepily hit on someone half his age just for one scene.
You can download Mr. Robot on iTunes.

Tyrant: I thought we were going to have a repeat of the first season of Homeland where the suicide vest did not go off then… boom goes the dynamite. And now that Jamal is dead, it looks like Barry is slowly morphing from the voice of reason to the titular character.
You can download Tyrant on iTunes.

Sunday, August 21, 2016

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 8/21/16

Ray Donovan: A couple weeks ago, Ray sang Bob Seger and this week he danced the Chihuahua, I am beginning to wonder if the actor did something to the writers to make him act the fool. Not that I am complaining, the main problem with the show is that it can get too serious, especially Ray, so this sillier moments make it much more enjoyable. And Connor, if you want to be taken serious, how about not playing dancing video games?

Roadies: Fun fact: I used to work at an amphitheater in college and Lynard Synard came to town, and no lie, played a forty-five minute set, obviously ending with Sweet Home Alabama. Then came back out for an encore which ended up being a forty-five minute version of Free Bird.

BrainDead: I am beginning to wonder if the show is running out of story and it is about tie to wrap things up. I really do not care if Laurel’s dad has bugs in his head.
You can download BrainDead on Amazon Instant Video, free with a Prime membership.

Pretty Little Liars: So the doctor was a complete waste. Meh. Hopefully Hanna is going to go Liam Neeson to find Uber A next week.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Casual: I spent the whole episode wondering what was going on with the dad, did I just imaging him being carted into his home by a ambulance, did I watch the episodes out of order? That storyline was much more interesting than anything that happened this week. At least it will make for an interesting finale.
You can watch Casual on Hulu.

Mr. Robot: Fan theories are a fun way to talk about like Megan would be at the Manson murders because she wore a Shannon Tate shirt; but these wild fan theories never come to fruition. Well except Lost is purgatory, which kind of what the flashsideways were in the final season even though the writers swore the island was not. So when the theory of Eliot being in prison and delusionally thinking he was back living with his mother popped up on the internet, I filed it in the crazy, Sharon Tate type theories. Sure it was an interesting theory, Eliot having a very set routine because he was forced to, but there were too many holes. Craig Robinson really being a prison guard did not really jive, plus Eliot left the house and when to places other than the basketball court, which could be a prison court yard. He even was able to get his hands on drugs to make Mr. Robot disappear.

Except the wild theory was true, Eliot has been in prison this whole time. The big problem is they did this the first season with making it obvious that Mr. Robot was in Eliot’s head, then spent a couple episodes poking holes in that theory only to be, actually he is just in Elliot’s head! And what about Craig Robinson? Was he really an evil prison guard? Was he just in Elliot’s head? Were the Craig Robinson scenes a prequel to the season and him being nabbed by the FBI after chess is why he is in prison? Except we saw Eliot with Craig at the basketball game. If not because of Craig, why is Elliot in prison? It seems it is not because of the Evil Corp hack because the FBI is still looking. Did the Ashley Madison guy get him. I am confused. I miss Alf.
You can download Mr. Robot on iTunes.

Sunday, August 14, 2016

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 8/14/16

Ray Donovan: This show would be much better if Cochran and Ray were forced to team up every week. Can’t Cochran become the new Ezra?

Roadies: Not since the over choreographed scene with KellyAnne running back to the band at the end of the Pilot has anything been so obvious that KellyAnne would end up getting the perfect picture after be denigrated by her idol. Okay, it was also pretty obvious that Phil find his way back to the tour considering Ron White was in the title credits this whole time. Still I find the show very enjoyably, it is kind of like a cozy but tattered blanket reminding me of a time when shows used to be fun before The Sopranos came along and most shows had to be super serious ever since.

BrainDead: As silly as Laurel almost being subjected to enhanced interrogation (granted as not likely that scenario is in present day, I can see that playing out exactly that way in a potential Trump presidency), it did make for a good scene with the bug people inadvertently voting against the torture.
You can download BrainDead on Amazon Instant Video, free with a Prime membership.

Pretty Little Liars: So Charles had a sibling that is the Liars’ age. They seem to heavily pushing Noel so that probably means it is not him. Sara is blonde and has the look, but she just died (or so we are led to believe, it would not be the first time someone came back from the dead). It is ethnically impossible (not that it has stopped the writers before, Charles turned out being a chick who dated her brother and significantly younger than they led us to believe) but I am rooting for Mona. But I am guessing it will end up being Jenna.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Casual: What was up with the ending? Is our health system so messed up that we are talking people back to their homes when they run out of money?
You can watch Casual on Hulu.

Mr. Robot: I am beginning to think the writers are just trolling us now. And I thought the two straight weeks where they started with a flashback was unnecessary, this week we got a full twenty minutes of Elliot stuck in a cheesy nineties sitcom (I think Married with Children did that very episode) complete with Alf. Alf! Alf killing Gideon!! Again!!! How could anyone possibly take the rest of the episode serious after that (um, I think Angela got hit on with a really bad pick up line)? But hey, at least they worked in an Up All Night reference because, c’mon, does anyone remember anything about USA in the nineties other than Up All Night? I guess we did get one thing out of that, it seemed pretty clear that Mr. Robot admitted to killing Tyrell. Sure you cannot truly believe a delusion, but he did admit to it.
You can download Mr. Robot on iTunes.

Sunday, August 07, 2016

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 8/7/16

MTV Classic: A couple years ago VH1, in honor of MTV’s anniversary they devoted an entire weekend to the channel’s history with classic episodes of its shows and a couple documentaries. It was a great watch and made me think that is what VH1 Classic should be. And how about running full episodes of Yo! MTV Raps, Headbangers Ball, and 120 Minutes instead of random blocks of music videos in the morning. But then VH1 Classic went back to its rock heavy schedule and random movies that have nothing to do with music after the weekend was over.

So I got slightly excited when I heard they were rebranding VH1 Classic as MTV Classic bringing back classic shows from the channel’s history. The lauch started off well enough with an Unplugged marathon but I have been less than enthused since. Sure they show the occasional Beavis and Butt-Head, but so far they have been all episodes from the recent reboot and none from the nineties. And is any one setting their DVR for midnight airings of Run’s House? C’mon, where is Remote Control. And still no one is taking my advice to show genre specif shows in their entirety, instead we are still getting random videos in the morning. Really not the best start when the first one I saw was Vertical Horizon’s Everything You Want. Even worse, the first time I came across Yo! Hip Hop Hits, they were showing a video by Xscape, a fifth rate nineties girl group (featuring the future Mrs. T.I.) who are neither hip hop nor classic. Le sigh.

Ray Donovan: Did we really need to start off the episode with some dude pleasuring himself to a chick playing Cat’s Cradle? And just when you thought that was gong to be the most graphic part of the episode, a minute later we get to watch s full body cavity search. And then a couple minutes after that Conner pulls out some lubricant? Then after everything he went through with the Russians to get Belikov out of jail, he kills him over the Cat’s Cradle chick. That is probably not going to go over well.

Preacher: What the frack was that? Was that meant to not be coherent and meant to be a complete mess? How does an episode like that even make it to air?
You can download Preacher on iTunes.

Roadies: In the beginning I thought it was a wise choice to keep the band in the background and focus on the titular characters (and definitely we should never hear any of their songs because the worst part of these scripted music shows is they are supposed to be superstars but their songs are mediocre at best), but after Janine went HAM on the lead singer, the band instantly became extremely interesting. I actually want to see more of Janine as she writes her tell all and Chris’s reaction to all the revelations. And just how does Bill not get fired for sleeping with the lead singer’s girlfriend even if I took place a decade or so ago?

The John Mellencamp cameo made me wonder just where do some of these celebrity cameo stories come from. Did Cameron Crowe ask them for the personal stories like the one about the hundred year old grandmother that could fit in the show? Are they strictly written for the show? Are they stories Crowe has heard and asked the celebrities if he can use it on the show?

BrainDead: I figured Laurel would find a way to get the bugs out of her head before they push out half her brain, but I thought she would simply go to the refrigerator and put some bacon on her ear. Instead we got maybe the most entertaining segment on television this year.
You can download BrainDead on Amazon Instant Video, free with a Prime membership.

Pretty Little Liars: Seriously promo monkeys, we are already to the countdown portaon of the season. I get annoyed with the “one more episode until the (insert hyperbolic adverb here) finale” promo but four more episodes is a bit much. Sad thing is, that is most of what I remember from this episode. Um, Alison got attacked by someone and it turned out to not be her dead fiancĂ©e who is still in the ground. It probably was not Sara who ended up dead. Um, evil(er) twin maybe?
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Mr. Robot: Well at least we did not start with a cute flashback this week. And good news for anyone who was wondering what Angela’s douchebag ex-boyfriend was up to. Otherwise, meh.
You can download Mr. Robot on iTunes.

Tyrant: Oh hey Barry, you are really doing that days after your daughter died and hours after your wife checked herself into a mental institution? Cold.
You can download Tyrant on iTunes.

The Challenge: Rivals III: What a horrible ending to a horrible season. What a completely douche thing to do even by Johnny Banana’s standards. At least he cannot possibly get another invitation back after that and even so, how is he not sent into whatever they are calling the elimination round every time? What is worse was the whole point thing was kind of shady; I never really got the standing on the log checkpoint, and making things worse it was worth two points. Why not just stay on the log and refuse to leave?
You can download The Challenge: Rivals III on iTunes.

2016 Rio Olympics Opening Ceremonies: Not a very good sign for these games that I fell asleep somewhere around the M’s during the parade of nations. I am ready to call it the worse opening ceremonies of my lifetime. I know Pele was sick, but how was the biggest name at the ceremony Giselle? Was there really no one more important from Brazil? I was ready for Camilla from The Challenge or Abi-Maria from Survivor to pop up.

Sunday, July 24, 2016

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 7/24/16

Ray Donovan: Welcome back FBI guy (although it was a little silly Ray got the epiphany to see him after seeing a chick in a “Federal Boobie Inspector” t-shirt), he and Micky’s parole officer are the best character on the show. I was actually thinking when he told Ray that he looks like a Bob Seger guy, how disappointing that we will not get to see Ray pretend to be a member of The Silver Bullet Band. Yet somehow FBI guy actually got Ray to do it. I wonder if Showtime asked for this so there would be some synergy with Roadies. That song got the asking price down three million, but apparently Ray does not have two million lying around (um, whatever happened to his buy a football team money?) and will look to get that Horseshoe money with Micky. Whenever those two work together, things never go well. Actually Ray needs that money because of killing all the Armenians for Micky.

Preacher: The hell is not as far as you think comment was really deep, too bad they muddled it by making Eugene turning out to be fake.
You can download Preacher on iTunes.

Roadies: Did someone already say the C-word on the bus before because the tour already seemed pretty cured up to now. The one guy fired everyone including Phil who seemed to be the lifeblood of the tour (bu hey, he got to go to space with Taylor Swift), they are on their third opening act (does My Morning Jacket count as the fourth or was Jim James just a stowaway), oh and this week the bassist went MIA with the band’s groupie. But I wonder if The Who cast is to explain the inevitable hookup of KellyAnn and the money guy. No way that is really happening without some devilish curse pushing them together.

Pretty Little Liars: Ugg, Ezra proposed to Aria? Still creepy after all these year. Hopefully Ezra’s not so deas fiancĂ© comes back and ruins that relationship one more time.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Casual: I said last week the workplace would be weird if Pete Campbell found out about Alex and his fiancé and it is worse than weird, Pete Campbell plans to burn the company to the ground. Oops. And of course Alex then hooks up with her again, and it kind of looks like she is moving in as he brought a lot of luggage.
You can watch Casual on Hulu.

Mr. Robot: Fun Society? Alrighty. I fear we may be getting into Lost-ian territory of silly backstory told in way too cute of a way (the concrete scene was a bit much too). But it is hard out there for secondary characters from the first season, All Safe dude last week, hacker guy this week. I fear for the job security of Gloria Rubin. But the other hackers think it may be the Chinese. My first thought was Tyrell. Mr. Robot also crossed my mind as well as E-Corp who would rather dispense their own brand of justice than let the Feds deal with it.

Tyrant: What the frack? Why did they have and go kill off the hot chick? Sure her character was worthless but, um, yeah, oh well. And did they really kill Jamal too? Sure he was flat lining but that does not stop some people from coming back to life. I know this is a third world country, but he is a former president, so where were the doctors when he started to flat line? Still this guy survived driving off a cliff and being show at point blank range, certainly he can survive a pillow.
You can download Tyrant on iTunes.

The Challenge: Rivals III: Finally, a silly challenge harkening back to the early days and not some everyone takes turns to do something short and boring. The Jungle should have been better too except no one got dirty. How do you not pull a leg as they are going by?
You can download The Challenge: Rivals III on iTunes.

Sunday, July 17, 2016

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 7/17/16

Ray Donovan: Oh Bridget that was harsh, especially with the fake Boston accent. And of course Conner was just oblivious to the whole thing complaining gun shots ruining his television show. Why are the sons on anti-hero show always the most worthless and incompetent? And just how many times has Terry sat alone in the center of his gym with a gun? Well at least he had company this time around.

Roadies: It was clear by showing up and sitting next to fake Lindsey Buckingham on Saturday Night Live that the real Lindsey Buckingham had a sense of humor, but who really knew just how funny he was? Just the reaction shot of him with Rainn Wilson were great. Speaking of whom, I wonder if Rainn’s character was based on anyone in particular and this was Cameron Crowe’s revenge against some bad reviews.

Murder in the First: Kind of a weird start to the season, in the first episode, Hildy gets a dire diagnosis, but then in the second, they were just like, oops, we were looking at someone else’s records. Then Terry kills what looks to be an unarmed black man, how topical, but again, another false alarm, the perp’s gun fell out of his waist in the chase. Two storylines that looked like they could have been season long arcs that the writers were just, um, nevermind.
You can download Murder in the First on iTunes.

BrainDead: Sure I laughed at the cat CAT scan. Which begs the question what do those bugs do to cats? It clearly makes humans more partisan. And are these bug controlling their humans or just heightening already existing views? The head dive makes it seem like the former. But does that make the bugs partisan or are they just taking over the already held beliefs in the human. At any rate, those previously on segments are just gold.
You can download BrainDead on Amazon Instant Video, free with a Prime membership.

Pretty Little Liars: What a horrible plan. Some dude ran in front of you when you were following him when he kidnapped your friend, which is a legitimate excuse to the police. Instead they come uup with an elaborate plan of leaving his phone on a train (which Spencer ended up being too drunk to do) and burn the car that hit him which would have been extremely conspicuous, at Mona knew a guy who does not ask questions.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Casual: I did not see the episode title was “Threesome” until after the episode ended. The teenagers were obvious (is it horrible of me to think he may be faking), but the more interesting part of the episode were the emotional threesomes, Valerie is stuck between the two guys, one who is pushing hard and the other who is drunk texting random emojis. Then Alex is not even in a threesome, it is more of a foursome with his crazy ex, her fiancĂ© (possibily ex, that will be one weird working environment if he finds out about them; although they seemed to figure out about him and the secritary) and their pathological assistant.
You can watch Casual on Hulu.

Mr. Robot: What a weird way to start the season, Tyrell was completely absent from the marketing of the second season except being named dropped by President Obama leading me to wonder his involvement in the second. Then he was the first person we see in season two, of course never to be seen again in the double episode premiere. One thing I went back and forth on all first season was: is Tyrell real? That opening scene made me lean back to the delusion side. Then when Elliot asked Mr. Robot where Tyrell is, it reinforced that theory as if when they are not out and about, all of Elliot’s personas are hanging out in his head like Inside Out.

But then Tyrell’s picture was plastered on an episode of Nancy Grace (natch) which pulled me back to the real person side and that maybe the reason Elliot ask Mr. Robot about Tyrell because Elliot knew Tyrell was in the game room, then Mr. Robot took over and when Elliot took over again, Tyrell was missing. I did come up with another theory in that Tyrell is both real and fake. When Elliot meets Tyrell in the Pilot, Elliot decide he is going to be his patsy and to best set him up as the fall guy had to become him and who we saw ever since was Elliot’s delusion. The flaw in that is where does the pregnant wife come from, could she be another delusion?

Speaking of patsies, RIP Gideon. I was surprised he even showed up again and of course he will not again. Though I was unclear what the other guy’s motive was: revenge, fame, hired by Evil Corp to make Gideon the fall guy? Poor Gideon, the ultimate wrong guy wrong time. But really the most interesting part of the first two episode was Elliot saying that we, the audience probably does not trust him the way he does not trust him. Very true, I am beginning to believe less and less of what my eyes see on this show. I am just hoping this does not lead to some sort of St. Elsewhere finale (where the audience learned the whole show was taking place in the mind of an autistic kid) and everything we have seen was taking place in kid Elliot’s mind who is really laying in a coma from the time his father pushed him out a window.
You can download Mr. Robot on iTunes.

The Challenge: Rivals III: Another meh challenge (okay, Vince belly flopping was somewhat entertaining), even the Jungles were stupid too this week. What ever happened to the physical challenge where teams go head to head, almost every challenge this season teams have been taking turns. But at least we got a “Greatest Moments” episode this week. Granted it was basically twenty-five minutes of waiting for the CT using Johnny as a backpack. Weird that they completely ignored all the fighting or the time Julie almost killed Veronica. I guess it was not surprising that the avoided the time Tonya emptied Beth’s luggage into the pool considering the things that happened behind the scenes with here.
You can download The Challenge: Rivals III on iTunes.

Tyrant: These types of family drama follow a familiar format; the older daughter gets a storyline (for better or worse) while the younger brother just stays in the background. This show kind of flipped that, well both children are mostly worthless, but every once and a while the son does something to remind you, oh yeah, he is a gay homosexual, but really never push that storyline very far. After three seasons, they finally gave the daughter something to do in being captured. I am with Barry, you cannot trade the daughter for the wife, they would likely just kill both, really, the obvious answer is to get the American general exactly what he wants and have them send in Seal Team 6 to rescue the daughter.
You can download Tyrant on iTunes.

Sex&Drugs&Rock&Roll: Networks got interesting with their On Demand channels. NBC made the most noise by releasing the entire season of Aquarius after its series premiere. What I found more interesting was FX released uncensored version of this show on its On Demand channel. But much like NBC who did not air drop Aquarius this season, for some reason did not upload uncensored episode leaving me to wonder just what Denis Leary is saying whenever the audio when silent. Hurumph.
You can download Sex&Drugs&Rock&Roll on iTunes.

Sunday, July 10, 2016

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 7/10/16

Preacher: I have been pretty ambivalent to the show but I did laugh more than once at the respawning angels. And about the ending, are we ever going to see Eugene again? I guess this is the type of show where people could escape Hell so I would not be that surprised. I wonder if doing harm accidentally via Genesis will make Jessie more inclined to let go of it. Okay, no need to wonder, there is no show without it in him.
You can download Preacher on iTunes.

Roadies: It was clear by showing up and sitting next to fake Lindsey Buckingham on Saturday Night Live that the real Lindsey Buckingham had a sense of humor, but who really knew just how funny he was? Just the reaction shot of him with Rainn Wilson were great. Speaking of whom, I wonder if Rainn’s character was based on anyone in particular and this was Cameron Crowe’s revenge against some bad reviews.

Pretty Little Liars: Oh yeah, I completely forgot the season started with the Liars burying someone (they made it seem like Hannah who was absent from the scene) or what I thought was something because, c’mon, they definitely would not bury Hannah in the middle of the woods, or as I thought then, anyone else. Oops, got that one wrong. They actually ran over Ally’s husband. Poor Hannah, she is really having a bad week, she is the one that gets captured by Uber A and then she is the one behind the wheel during the hit and run with the deceased literally starring at her with his head through the windshield.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Casual: Just two episodes ago I mentioned how this season was about casual friendships and not casual hook up, and this week all three main characters hooked up with someone. And what world do we live in when a man cannot hook p with his business partner’s secretary and not have to get lawyers involved? That seemed to be a prerequisite at Sterling Cooper (and sometimes Draper Price). Pete Campbell even impregnated one. The guy even spearheaded the pimping of Joan out to that fat slob to secure his business for the firm. Man, someone really need to punch Pete on this show.
You can watch Casual on Hulu.

The Challenge: Rivals III: No. No, no, no, no, no. You can feed me all the cow balls you want, you can make be grind on a block of ice, I will even be worn as a backpack by CT and thrown into a trash can, but you are not getting me in a box and burying me alive. Nope. But I did like the trivia (though I would rather there be a history trivia or a spelling bee), it was kind of like on Survivor when they have those late stage season challenges where people realize just where they sit in their alliance. The course of a couple season changed by people realizing they are on the bottom and flipping for a better position.
You can download The Challenge: Rivals III on iTunes.

Aquarius: I watch this how for its stupidity (c’mon, Mulder was the guy who suggested Bobby Kenedy go through the kitchen where he is assassinated and the gay Republican who had the hots for him just happened to be there and of course so was Charlie Manson) but you juxtaposed Manson trying to start a race war and what is going on today with people trying to race bait juts made me uneasy.
You can download Aquarius on iTunes.

Saturday, June 25, 2016

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 6/25/16

Penny Dreadful: What is going on over at Showtime. About a month ago they announced House of Lies was ending with just episodes to go in the season. Then they announce the end of Penny Dreadful by added a “The End” title card to the end of the season finale, adding a press release saying yes this is the end the next day. Add that to the recent announcement of its flagship show Homeland will not be airing in its normal fall slot, instead being delayed to winter. I actually do like the surprise “The End” title card because sometime the anticipation of the final couple episodes of a series can really drag on the enjoyment of the show as you spend too much time worrying if the show will stick the landing.

Of course when the show ends, you still are left to decide if the show did stick the landing. The death of Vanessa did bring things full circle and it was probably for the best to put her out of her suffering. Same with Frankenstein’s monster who realized that it is for the best for everyone to let someone stay dead, no matter how much you loved them. Other storylines just kind of fell flat. Dorian was always the weakest link on the show and never really fit. Then I spent most of the season waiting for Mr. Hyde to show up, instead all we got was Lord Hyde who does not seem all that different from Dr. Jekyll. I guess you can say metaphorically that Lily was the split personally, or even Vanessa. But in the end it is probably the right call to just end the show here, it was enjoyable while it lasted but it was never going to be great. I will just be slightly disappointed the show did not last long enough to introduce the Invisible Man.

BrainDead: What a bizarre way to do a “previously On” package. I would expect it from a show like Galavant, but I wonder what possessed the writers on this show to do a musical recap about alien brain bugs and exploding heads. And I am not sure if it really exists, but sadly I can totally believe that there actually is a “Tax Prom” every year. But my big complaint with this show is I really do not understand what is going on with the aliens. Are half conservative and half liberal and just happen to inhabit different brains to continue their partisan war? Do they take on the traits of the brains they inhabit and just amplify those ideas? And why do some brains explode?
You can download BrainDead on Amazon Instant Video, free with a Prime membership.

Pretty Little Liars: There are few things I hate more than the “x amount of time earlier” title card at the end of the first scene of an episode. The only thing that is worse is when they do even resolve that scene until later in that season. So we start off the season with the Liars sans Hannah burying someone (or something, I am not entirely sold on them burying a dead body). The title card only said four days ago so hopefully we do not have to wait the whole season to get there.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Casual: It only took four episodes, but I finally see what they are doing. The first season was all about casual romantic relationships and this season is all about casual friendships. Valerie has her work neighbor, Laura has her study group buddy, and Ale, well, he still has the British dude. But now that I realized that, I have to start wondering at which point do any of the friends try to make a romantic move?
A lot was made at all the women Don Draper bedded, but if we are talking quality over quantity, Pete Campbell had Don beat hands down: Alison Brie, Sarah Wright, Alexis Bledel, Jessy Schram. So I was expecting bit more with his finance on this show. Granted if she ended up stealing all of Alex’s lightbulbs later in this season, her stock will rise greatly. And if I were the Asian chick, I would be a bit offended by being called Bill Wennington. C’mon, at least give her Horace Grant.
You can watch Casual on Hulu.

The Challenge: Rivals III: Wow, that was cheap. Vince actually throws punches and gets off with a warning, Tony hovers over his parter and gets tossed. That is like in baseball where a pitcher throws at a dudes head as hard as he can, both teams gets a warning, then a couple innings later some middling reliever drills someone between the shoulder blades with a sixty mile per hour retaliation pitch and gets the boot. To add insult to injury, it was even Vince who basically instigated the whole thing by knocking Camilla to the ground making her go full drunken Brazilian mode leading to Vince and Johnny to wake up the blacked out Tony. Karma should dictate Vince should automatically go to the Junglee. And with a memory challenge, he may very well depending how attentive Jenna is.
You can download The Challenge: Rivals III on iTunes.

Aquarius: Not a good sign for the second week in a row I fell asleep while watching. I did wake up in time to see the chick with the bad accent turn on the creepy biker dude. Worse sign, I did not even bother to look up a recap to see what I missed.
You can download Aquarius on iTunes.

Tuesday, May 03, 2016

I Want My Music Television: 5/3/16

Needed Me - Rihanna

Another Rihanna video and another Rihanna video where she wears a see-thru top. Why even wear clothes at this point.

Get You Back – Mayer Hawthorne

So we have reached the end of the Mayer Hawthorne noir trilogy and, well, it ended like every noir tale ever made, with him turning on the femme fatale. Guess I should have see that coming.

She Burns – Foy Vance

Putting hot chicks as a stand in is a music video staple, but Foy Vance (not to be confused with Vance Joy, the Riptide guy; not that I made that mistake or anything) could have done better than Aria. Should have tried to get Hannah instead.

Trash - Tyler Glenn

Rock music has slowly been dying for years and pop-rock is also nearly nonexistent anymore. Which makes it even more surprising that Neon Trees have managed multiple hits this decade. To the surprise of probably no one, lead singer Tyler Glenn came out as gay last year despite being a Mormon. His faith and sexuality are in stark contrast to each other in his first solo song and music video. I am just disappointed as catchy as the best Neon Trees songs are, this new song just sounds like every crappy dance-pop song that is making top forty unlistenable these days.

Sunday, March 20, 2016

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 3/20/16

Once Upon a Time: Poor Abigail Hobbs, suffers so long on Hannibal only to get her throat slit by him and end up in the underworld. I figured she would end up being the love interest from the Hercules movie, but that movie was so unmemorable I barely even remember her. And since this half of the season is based on his movie, it is weird that it looks like Hercules only gets one episode. I guess being a demi-god means he could probably travel to the Underworld whenever he wants, so maybe he will be back to take on his uncle.
You can download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Shameless: Oh Lip, you just do not pour Jack Daniels down your throat, which was just the bane of my existence in college. I guess I am lucky to never walking up in a hospital and downing that. But maybe the dumber part of the episode was Fiona excepting a proposal by a guy using her current husband’s engagement ring. Shouldn’t it happening at your divorce proceeding be a huge red flag as to you not being marriage ready? And I cannot help but assume Frank is guying to go through that weed stash befor the commune makes enough to move to Hawaii, here is a guy who still has not learned to never, under any circumstance, get high off his own supply.

The Walking Dead: It took me a couple of minutes to recognize Alicia Witt. And it only took me a couple more minutes before realizing I do not want to see evil Alicia Witt. At least she died quickly, well after having her face eaten off. Ouch.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Billions: At the beginning of the episode I thought, oh wow, having the janitor as a mole is kind of brilliant, he can go through trash, is usually alone after hours to do other snooping. That may actually be better than blackmailing the lesbian. Who would suspect the janitor? But I turns out the attorney’s mole is actually a double agent and Axe knows everything. Though how does this even end good for the mole / double agent? Does Axe have a retirement plan for him where he lives on the beach of a country without an extradition tready? There is the old saying that some people play checkers against people playing chess, Axe may be playing three dimensional chess while Rhoades is just playing regular chess.

Quantico: Stupid promo monkey, last week when they said someone was going to die this week, I figured there is no way they would kill of the person with a bomb strapped to their waist, but that is exactly who they killed (granted not with that bomb). Also my theory about death no meaning much on the show since the actors would still be in flashbacks became moot because that chick got sent packing in the flashbacks too.
You can download Quantico on iTunes.

Supergirl: Awe, red kryptonite, always good to spruce things up. I did like how they explained it as Maxwell Lord failing to recreate the regular kind. It also explains why Jimmy would not instantly know what was going on because Superman would have never been exposed before. Apparently Superman was too busy to stop his cousin from destroying her city so instead Martian Manhunter had to expose himself. Though that still does not explain why they did not have any green kryptonite to weaken her first so he did not have to out himself as an alien too, and in the process go, oh yeah, the guy whose body I took over is dead. Still I give it one episode before a threat so great pops up that they need to release him to help Supergirl in the fight.
You can download Supergirl on iTunes.

Gotham: Holy Lori Petty sighting! And still sporting her Tank Girl haircut about a quarter of a century later. Interesting that the show has younger versions of all the Batman buddies and villains and yet we get what I assume is a older Harley Quinn surrogate. But of course since she is in the movies, we will likely never get an actual character named Harley Quinn on the show. That would have been a lot more interesting than the Silver St. Cloud we got instead.
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

Lucifer: Holy Herc back in a wheelchair sighting! A couple episodes back I suggested what this show needed was a serialized component, except I was hoping for something more supernatural, not a cop corruption case. And of course the separated husband shot the other cop, it is really the only possible suspect. Maybe this will end up having a supernatural component because Lucifer did save the guy. Does he know that he was shot by the husband and that is why he saved him? But if so, why not tell lady cop her husband is corrupt.
You can download Lucifer on iTunes.

Blindspot: Oh wow, a Chrissy Seaver training montage, get that girl in the field. But I thought for sure the mole was going to end up being Sutter ex-girlfriend. Oh well.
You can download Blindspot on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Ooo, Talbert was the mole, not a good way to start off that relationship. But I missed part of the episode because my local ABC station broke into the show for John Kasich’s victory speech as if anyone who actually wanted to hear it was not all ready watching CNN or another 24-hour cable channel. So after a minute of him not actually saying anything (Apparently there was a protester yet the cameraman could not find him) I flipped over to The Voice until it went to a commercial. So I switch back to ABC and they were airing commercials already. So I flipped to CNN and Kasich was still talking. Seriously, if you are going to break into a show just show the whole speech at that point. So I missed about five minute of the show. I went to Hulu the next day but forgot ABC has a stupid eight day waiting period as if they do not want people to ever get caught up. I am certainly not watching it On Demand if I cannot skip to the part I missed, so hopefully nothing important happened during those five minutes.
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Pretty Little Liars: Wait, let me get this straight, CeCe is not Alison’s sister, but her cousin, that her parents adopted (and then ignored even existed) whose mother is Mrs. Dilarentas twin (and apparently has the same initials A.D.), is just as tech savy as her daughter, and is in cahoots with CeCe’s doctor who married Alison as part of some plan that involves an extremely lifelike Wilden mask. Alrighty. And of course Hanna’s plan to admit she was the killer turned out horribly.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Survivor: Brains vs. Brawn vs. Beauty: After Lizzie got the boot two weeks ago, I came to the realization that I do not particularly like anyone this season besides the hot chick alliance. And as if the show was trolling me (and every red-blooded American straight dude watching), when they split the tribes into two, the hot chick alliance somehow ended up on three different beaches. Making things worse, the third hot chick would replace the person who gets voted out waking it is both tribes best interest to get rid of a Beauty to make sure they do not become a majority on their tribe. What an amazing turnabout because had Caleb had not been pulled from the game, and assuming the tribe split when the same way with Caleb and Hot Chick #3 go to opposite tribes, the Beauty tribe goes from a majority in both tribes to being outnumbered or even in the tribes.

What is amazing is the actually had a way to make lemonade out of lemons because Gay Asian had an Idol, if he uses it correctly, can turn hiss tribe from a Brains dominated tribe into a Beauty controlled one. Except Gay Asian and Scot showed exactly why they did not start on the Brains tribe because they both made extremely dumb strategic moves. Instead of using the Idol, giving his tribe a Beauty majority, now Gay Asian is exactly where he was when the tribes swapped, one less Beauty than Brain with untrustable Scot in the middle. So he may very have to use that Idol next week except now when someone gets voted out, there is not another Beauty coming to help you out. I fully understand wanting to save an Idol for yourself, but the one time you do give an Idol to someone else is to get the numbers on your side. And what is even worse now for Gay Asian is that now not only does he not have the numbers, everyone knows he has an Idol which puts him in a horrible position in the game.

As for Scot, telling Gay Asian not to play the Idol was a bad strategic move too. So what if he now knows where two Idols are? Does he really think that if he is voted out, Gay Asian and Bounty Hunter are really going to come together like Voltron to save him? Do you know what is better than knowing where two Idols are? Having your own Idol. And if Gay Asian plays his Idol, there will be a new one in play the very next day that you can go out and find for yourself (and there is another reason Gay Asian should have played his, he already found one Idol, go and replace it after you play one like Kelley Wentworth last season). You can easily convince Bounty Hunter to enter a pact to save each other, than to get two people to give up their Idols for basically nothing.
You can download Survivor: Brains vs. Brawn vs. Beauty on iTunes.

The Americans: It took the daughter three seasons to find out her parents were Russians, so I guess it should not be surprising nothing happens with that information except tell her minister who I guess is bound by some client confidentiality agreement or something. Kind of a run of the mill premiere as I guess these chemical weapons will be this season’s theme. How disappointing Stan did not break it while assaulting Philip.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

Nashville: What a boring wedding. No deaths, no crashers. Just Avery annoyingly getting asked where Juliette was every two minutes. At least let Layla go HAM after learning Jeff did not kill himself and Juliette was just covering it up so she did not look bad. Meh.
You can download Nashville on iTunes.

Sunday, March 13, 2016

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 3/13/16

Once Upon a Time: I kind of half joked when Emma said they were going to the Underworld that Hades from Hercules better show up. Then at the end of the episode the king of the Underworld’s hair turned flame blue and it turned out I was right. Man, they are really scrapping the bottom of the Disney barrel on this one. Are they going to Notre Dame next?
You can download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Shameless: Oh Frank, everyone knows the number one rule of drug trafficking is never get high off your own supply. Of course that was going to end badly. Just like Debbie and her pregnant fetish guy. I saw that coming as soon as he asked for her help. Yet that was not even the most shameless moment of the episode. When Lip was confronted by Queenie, I thought, oh no, Lip is going to have sex with his… um; father’s baby momma I guess is what you would call it. And they actually kind of did it depending, not to get all Bill Clinton, on how you describe sex. Physically helping someone to, um, finish the job, kind of constitutes sex. But going by the Bill Clinton definition it was not.

The Walking Dead: So everyone is hooking up now, which means there is going to be a lot of deaths coming up soon. Since she is captured, could Carol be next? I am hard pressed to think they would kill off a pregnant lady, but it seemed apropos that whoever has the two got introduced pretty much the same way Glen was introduced on the show. I thought Abraham was getting the he is about to die edit last week but this week he just dumped Rosita presumably so he can shack up with Sasha instead. Sure I would not kick Sasha out of bed, but Rosita has to be the most attractive chick you are going to find during a zombie apocalypse. But I guess mullet guy has a chance now.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Billions: You know someone is really mad when they get out of a pool and go straight to their car, no shirt, no shoes, not even toweling off, to go punch someone. But c’mon Axe, you have to at least make the kids spend the night at camp before letting them give up. It may be interesting to watch those brats suffer if everything is taken away when Axe goes to prison. Actually let’s not take the Brody mistake of keeping the family on the show too long for this show too.

Quantico: So someone is going to die next week. Except the gay dude died in the Winter finale and him being around in the flashbacks kind of lessens the impact of the death. Since she has a bomb strapped to her, she would be the obvious choice, which means she is not dying or that would be the worst promo monkey job of all time. Instead I think it is going to be one of the twins which would have even less of an impact because not only would they still be in flashbacks but there would still be one twin still alive.
You can download Quantico on iTunes.

Gotham: We have known Hugo Strange has been collecting “dead” people since the Winter finale when we saw Galivan being wheeled and we got to see him in some sort of tank this week. Behind him was three more tanks, the next two with their backs t us and the next facing towards us. I did not recognize that last guy and it is hard to identify someone by the back of their head but that second guy did have red hair so Jerome instantly came to mind. There was a very Fish Mooney looking figure during the Winter finale. So the question is when do these zombies get reanimated? Was the Mr. Freeze serum the final ingredient Hugo needs?
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

The Voice: The sad sack stories have been the worst part of the show (well the proliferation of boring white dudes over the past four seasons may actually be worse) but my goodness, do we really need to sit through a dude talking about he kept on hitting decline on his phone right before his dad killed himself? That was just really too rough. And of course it gets worse because no one bothered to turn their chair which seems to happen to some of the people with the saddest stories as if the producers bring them on only for their story knowing they probably will not turn a chair.

Every season I do a bi where I mention all the artists I am surprised anyone covered on the show because the Blind Auditions is where the people are most adventurous and I was surprised that dude sang an Incubus song. And now that I think about, maybe half of those people end up not getting a chair turned. Look at the guy who closed out the week, he auditions last season with a great Cameo song, does not get a chair to turn. Does an overdone song this time and is on a team.

Oh, and holy Ellie Lawrence sighting! Talk about letting people come back, I know they do not let people who get a chair to turn to try out again but really anyone screwed royalty deserves to come back and be on a team with a real coach. Although if they brought Ellie back, they would also have to change the rules to ban anyone who voted for Braiden Sunshine from ever voting again, which they should do anyway. And like the first week, I was pretty meh on the talent this season. Pharrell picked up another indie chick to add to the three he pick up last week, but Christina actually nabbed the best indie chick of the season (so far) with Kristen Marie.

Apparently The Voice is doing that stupid scheduling where Monday’s show will half Blind Auditions, half Battle Round, so I will release my Blind Audition Power Ranking Tuesday evening even though two people will probably already had been sent home (with the third loser being stolen). During the Best of the Blind Auditions special (so none of the five singers yet to be put on a team qualify as Best; though three of the five the only other time they had this format went on to the Live Playoffs so do not completely write them off; sure none of those three got saved by the public vote in the Live Playoffs, but anyway) they did give away a couple of the Battle pairing, I am going to make my predictions now (the person I think is going to win is listed first):

Team Blake
Mary Sarah vs. Justin Whisnant
Paxton Ingrim vs. Brittany Lawrence
Brittany Kennell vs. Trey O’Dell

Team Pharrell
Brian Nhira vs. Abby Celso
Nick Hagelin vs. Jessica Crosbie
Emily Keener vs. Johnathan Bach
Hannah Huston vs. Maya Smith

Team Adam
Natalie Yacovazzi vs. Nate Butler
Laith Al-Saadi vs Matt Tedder

Team Christina

Alison Porter vs. Lacey Mandingo
Tamar Davis vs. Shalyah Fearing
Malik Heard vs. Bryan Bautista

My first takeaway from the pairing is that Pharrell had four previews (and he is the only one who still has two spots left on his team compared to one for everyone else) while Adam only two previews, one of which was between two guy I kind of thought may have been fodder (even though I do like Laith). Actually the other pairing is between two people I would be a bit surprised if either made the Live Shows too. Last spring Pharrell had five of his six Battles result in a Steal and I wonder if that is going to happen again. If my predictions are right I could see someone stealing Abby and Maya who got good edits so far. And predicting Steals do seem to be completely random, but Pharrell Stealing Shalyah. Has he ever not Stolen a young soul singer? There also seems to be more co-ed battles than usual. I wonder if this is a way to consciously limit the number of boring whit dudes make the Live Shows this year after six of the eight singers America saved in the Playoffs last season were boring white dudes (out of a possible seven). My other takeaway from the previews was how much time they spent on only one of the Battle pairing which made some of these predictions really easy (sorry Maya and Lacy). We get it producers you really, really want Alison to win so a female singer and coach will win this season. Except the more you push, the more the bored housewives are going to rebel and have yet another boring white dude win for the fifth straight season.

Lucifer: Two take always from this episode; Lucifer’s brother calls him Lucy. And if the brother is now the gatekeeper to Hades, just how many people are escaping during his many trips to Erth to try to convince his brother to come back home? And when does Lucifer start hunting down those souls because that show would be much more interesting than this one.
You can download Lucifer on iTunes.

Blindspot: Holy Smash Williams sighting! But the bigger shock was Kurt’s sister and Edgar… who knew? Not that they were hooking up but that character’s name was Edgar, I had to look it up and had no clue what his name was. Oh yeah, then there was Jane Doe learning she died.
You can download Blindspot on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: So what was with the three months from now opener? Civil War does come out in May and the last Captain America movie is really the only time something in the movie actually had much of an effect on the show. But it is probably just a teaser for the season finale. But then again, three months is June and early May is when shows tend to wrap up for the year.
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Pretty Little Liars: The Liars have had some epically dumb ideas over the years, but Hannah admitting she killed CeCe. So what happens when A gets revenge or possibly calls the police?
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Survivor: Brains vs. Brawn vs. Beauty: So we had our first medical leave of the season (second because apparently Lizzie had to be flown back to America right after being voted out to deal with some staph infections). Just last week I mentioned how even when the person who is getting voted out they always plant a seed for someone else, this is the first time I remember them not even put up a red herring, and went straight to Tribal Council and did not even show Blondie scrambling. Shame the merge came a week too late for her because she could have teamed up with the hot chick alliance. Same for Lizzie. Should be interesting to she how it plays out, if anyone find the Brains Hidden Immunity Idol, or if they are going to put more Idols into play in hopes that a Super Idol gets played.
You can download Survivor: Brains vs. Brawn vs. Beauty on iTunes.

Saturday, February 27, 2016

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 2/27/16

Shameless: One thing I have learned from watching the Gallagher's i that even when things start to be looking up, things will still end up being worse. Except for Lip, dude continues to fail upwards. First, he is the only Gallagher that was able to get out and this week he gets fired from his Resident Assistant job and managed to land a better gig as house boy at a sorority. And yet he still messes it up but pining over the old married woman while blowing off the hot sorority sister. You are living the dream Lip, why are you messing up for the rest of us? So instead of participating in a pillow fight, the best scene of the week ended yup being Frank giving another impassioned speech during a suspension hearing (there was one with Carl a couple seasons ago which was just as good). But a close second goes to whoever decided to put subtitles when Carl was talking to his homies. Now I know what is "poppycock" is translated to in urban.

The Walking Dead: Rick and Michonne... who saw that coming? I guess they have been living together for a while now and she treats Carl like a son so it i not that surprising. I guess the big question is which one of them will die in the season finale. You know there is no way they are going to end up happy. Okay, that is probably aa stupid question, of course it will be Michonne they kill of, like a wise man said, always bet on black, especially when it comes to who will die next on this show.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Billions: What a great line about Chuck and Brody sniffing each other and not liking the smell. It was at that point I knew neither would back down even though Wendy pointed out to both of them this could easily go away. The big question as both looked to be willing to sit at the table would be which would be first to go back on their word. Despite saying he would never admit guilt (though how is forfeiting over a billion dollars not an admission of guilt?) Brody still ate it so it was Chuck who went over the line first (or twice if you include the admission of guilt thing) by demanding Brody never trade on the stock exchange ever again leading Brody to rip up the check, throw it in Chuck's face, and listen to more Metallica. But lost in the long game of chicken between Brody and Chuck was another great scene with the guy from the attorney General's office calling out Chuck for going too soft on Axe because of his wife before saying he was going hard after Brody because of his wife. Great question, just how much of this is about his wife, we do know they both enjoy pain.

Mercy Street: With historical dramas I tend to wait until the end of the series to look up really happen because I do not want to look up what happened in the real Deadwood only to find out someone was probably going to die soon. So I do wonder if there really was an attempt to blow up the hospital or was that just added for poetic licence. I am guessing that is the latter because how would anyone know what did not happen? I doubt the guy went home and rote in his journal about almost assassinating the president but did not go through with it to keep a friend from being collateral damage.
You can download Mercy Street on iTunes.

Supergirl: Of course the day I post about the absurdity of Irish names a Sloboden (but sounds like Chevonne) shows up on television that night, though the actress does not look to have any Irish in her. But anyway. A couple of off comments this week which are kind of annoying. First there was a conversation between Hank and Alex mentioned the villain of the week was a bounty hunter but not THAT bounty hunter. My mind first went to Boba Fett but that is not going to happen. I take it they were probably talking about Lobo butif so, just say his name. I guess they did not because they do not have permission to use the charachter which is getting kind of annoying on the comic book shows. Then Kara said there was another city that has people with masks, which again just name the city. Stop being coy. Again I have o guess she was referring to one of the cities depicted on one of the half dozen crappy CW shows. Meh.
You can download Supergirl on iTunes.

The X-Files: After the drag of the season premiere, I actually enjoyed the following episode, unfortunately, and inevitably, they had to end the season with the same story line. And had to bring back Agent Reyes who apparently was been the Cigarette Smoking Man's personal servant for the past decade. I Do not even want to know what the T-1000 was up to since then. Then they just had to end on a cliffhanger. Hurmph. So what was in the spaceship? Scully and Mulder's kid. If it come back, just wrap that story line up quick and just focus on monster of the week cases after that.
You can download The X-Files on iTunes.

Castle: Really, everyone know of the sociology experiment from years ago, but not one person thinks of Saw? Alrighty. And I really should be consulting for the NYPD, because I had that dude pegged early on as the guy running the experiment. C'mon, he had no loved one on the other side. But then again, it was a good thing I was not trapped in the room because my first instinct when the gun showed up was to shoot the bullets in the wall so no one could shoot me later. That would have backfired miserably, quite literally.
You can download Castle on iTunes.

Pretty Little Liars: I have long known that none of these girls are Veronica Mars so I have accept their utter stupidity from time to time, but c'mon, when the hole in Sara's hotel room gets plastered up, seriously, no one thought to show Allison the back door to Radley?
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Marvel's Agent Carter: Obviously Vinnie Van Lowe is great, but I really wanted more of his mother. The dance sequence at the start of the second episode was a nice touch too. Great ending with Rose saying she was not good enough for the fake talent agency. Too bad they did not work that into the show more often because the fake talent agency was comedy gold in the first episode.
You can download Marvel's Agent Carter on iTunes.

Survivor:Brains vs. Brawn vs. Beauty II: Maybe the most annoying part of Survivor is when everyone knows who is going home and yt the editors plant the seed of someone else may also be on the chopping block just to have some suspense at Tribal only for the obvious pick goes home ninety percent of the time. After flubbing last week's vote, obviously the Brawn tribe would actually get rid of Barbie this week. Sure an all-girl alliance seemed like a good idea (especially considering three tribe seasons get mixed up pretty early) so that actually seemed like. Except not only was it not the obvious pick that went home, or even the alternative that producers float to add a little suspense to Tribal, but maybe for the first time ever (not including Idol canceling votes) a third option was the person that went home. Wow, I cannot think of a worse Tribal performance in the history of the show except maybe the dude who basically handed a million dollars to the porn star in Thailand when he attacked the jury. This girl somehow managed to get three people to change their votes at tribal. People changing their votes at Tribal probably happens less than once a season (again, without an Idol in play or being threatened) and here it happened three times at the same Tribal. I did not think any tribe could be as dysfunctional as the last Brains tribe, but this season's Brawn tribe is trying hard. They are really one rice dump away. Seriously, how did they lose that challenge? Is there any bigger lay up for a Brawny tribe than carrying a sixty pound log a half a mile? I was expecting a drop off from the epic last season, but we are off to a strong start. Really my only gripe so far is the cat lady needs to go home sooner than later.
You can download Survivor: Brains vs. Brawn vs. Beauty II on iTunes.

The Blacklist: So what was in the envelope that Red burned? It has to be info on Lizzie's mom right? But why burn it? And why destroy something on screen that we the viewers will now never know what the contents were?
You can download The Blacklist on iTunes.