57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. XXI

Quote of the Week: You just Scooby Doo’d me, didn’t you? (Hurley, Lost)

Song of the Week: Good Lovin’ - The Young Rascals (As song by multiple Coma Guys, Eli Stone)

Big News of the Week: Friday Night Lights Shines On, Maybe: In a story I broke two weeks ago, Ben Silverman Is a Humongous Tool. Since then there were rumors of a Friday Night Lights movie to wrap up the show which I discredited because that is the token cool down the fanatics but making them think they will get a movie. Of course I’m still waiting an Angel movie The WB promised after it unceremoniously axed that show.

Then Variety posted an article (which I found courtesy of Herc of Ain’t It Cool fame) which said not only is there a possibility of a third season of Friday Night Lights, but it may be on multiple channels (think what NBC did this year with one of its five hundred Law and Order’s airing earlier on USA and saw a ratings boost). What makes me suspicious of this article is that NBC declined to comment, and there is no source mention in the article. Plus the network floated for sharing the show are The CW (why would they share with another network channel), E! (which only airs trashy shows, so FNL would not fit between The Girls Next Door reruns), and G4 (you know, the video game channel, granted Madden is one of the best selling video games and it does syndicate the also canceled too soon Arrested Development). More credible channels mentioned were TNT (who know drama so would fit perfectly) and Direct TV (which previously picked up daytime NBC show Passions). But even then, unlike the L&O case, none of these are owned by NBC Universal like USA. So until I hear anything official from NBC, my hopes will not be raised.


Coalition Links of the Week:
Buzz wondered if a movie version of The Wire would be a good idea. (BuzzSugar)

Sandie shared a preview clip from the new season of FX's Dirt. (Daemon's TV)

The return of live American Idol makes Mikey nostalgic for the TV of yesteryear. (Mikey Likes TV)

Marcia considered whether Ashes to Ashes was a worthy successor to Life on Mars. (Pop Vultures)

Rae dissected what she liked and disliked about the Knight Rider movie and admits she'd probably still give it a shot if NBC picks it up. (RTVW)

Cover your ears, TV fans. Jennifer couldn’t contain her anger and ranted against NBC for canceling Las Vegas. (Tube Talk)

The TV Addict helps pitch Friday Night Lighta to the CW, TNT and SCI FI. (the TV Addict)

Vance LOVES Lost even though he is completely lost while trying to follow the show. (Tapeworthy)

This week, Jace was underwhelmed by Knight Rider, entranced by Lost, and hungry for more of BBC's culinary competition, Last Restaurant Standing. (Televisionary)

Dan dug up some reality show contestants' porno past, including folks from Survivor and American Gladiators. (TiFaux)

Raoul interviewed Mary from Survivor. (TV Filter)


Welcome to the Captain: Still isn’t funny. Seriously, a cameo by Chunky Spice from *NSYNC? Check out the latest episodes over at Innertube. You can also download or Welcome to the Captain on iTunes.


My Dad Is Better Than Your Dad: Okay, I didn’t actually watch this. But from the five seconds they showed on Best Night Ever, I’m thinking Family Double Dare should sue.


Survivor: There has to be an inverse correlation between the intelligence of the survivors to the enjoyably of a season and thank God the favorites are some of the dumbest that have played the game. First you have Cirie deciding to go with the two couples instead of the loosely configured alliance. Then instead of trying to convince her of getting back into their alliance, Jonathan decides to berate her at camp and tribal council. And out of nowhere, Amy decides to vote for Cirie instead of with her alliance. And to make the episode even more enjoyable, they allowed contact between the survivor in the immunity challenge which always end badly. And by badly, I mean highly enjoyable. You had dudes body slamming chicks, people pull off other people’s clothes, Mike hitting on the other tribe. They really need to have more full contact challenges per seasons. Check out the latest episode over at Innertube.




Lost: Ugg, it looks like Lost may be falling back into its cycle of fifty-five minutes of tedium boredom with five minutes of jaw dropping plot twists. And even Not-Henry was calling out the show for recycling its plots with Locke locking up in a room bringing him food like in season two. Really the only thing that happened in the first fifty-five minutes was the revelation that everyone off the island thinks that only the Oceanic Six survived the crash aside from two that died after the crash. Of course being Lost this will end up sounding more important that it actually will be.

The big shocker of course being that Kate is now taking care of Aaron and it sounds as if she is making people believe that it is hers, this also presumably answers the question of who Kate had to get back to in the finale. But of course it creates more questions than it answered. Like does Aaron count as part of the six? I can see this going either way. Why would Jack avoid Aaron? Does he not know it is him? Or is his guilt so large that he doesn’t want to be reminded of what he did? I guess he hasn’t found out that it is his nephew. What happens to Claire? Does she die? Is she still on the island? Did she give up Aaron voluntarily so he didn’t have to grow up on the island? And where were the creepy black dude and/or his minions during the episodes, the one that approached Hurley and presumably Sayid is killing?

But during the uber-boring first part, I got to thinking of the Oceanic 6’s celebrity and the funeral that Jack went to last season. Many assumed Locke but it seems unlikely that a member of the Oceanic 6 would have no one show up at their funeral, certainly there are the morbid celerity seekers that would show up. My other thought back then was Not-Henry, but he seemed too powerful to end up like that. I am wondering if it were one of the Other Redux, the one whom he made a plan with to get off the island that ended up in the casket, Miles maybe. Check out the latest episode over at ABC.com.




Eli Stone: In my First Impressions, I mentioned that if Andrew from Buffy the Vampire Slayer showed up I may have to check myself for an aneurism, well Uncle Phil showing up is close enough. Seriously, this show may have the best casting director on television, well if it weren’t for the chick from Species. If only the writing were as good, it was pretty well telegraphed that the nappy headed lawyer would end up being offered a job. Check out the latest episode over at ABC.com. You can also download Eli Stone on iTunes.


Promo of the Week: After hyping the free Sports Illustrated Swimsuit video last week, I did a little stalking researching of the host of the video Brooklyn Decker and found that she was cast in failed NBC pilot, Lipshitz Saves the World and even though the show did not get picked up, of course a trailer for the show popped up on YouTube:



Seriously, how was this not picked up. I had the making of instantly being the funniest show on television. It would be like Chuck: The High School Years but actually funny and somehow with a hotter Token Hot Chick. Plus it has Leslie Nielsen playing Leslie Nielsen. Hopefully it is not too late for a slot on newly announced NBC year long television season or at the very least the concepy would make for a great movie idea. Someone get Judd Apatow on the phone for that.


Next Week’s Pick: Democratic Debate, Tuesday at 9:00 on MSNBC: You think the marketing people at a major network would be able to come up with a better nickname than Super Tuesday II but apparently that is what they are going with. A week before Texas and Ohio go to the polls, the two candidate’s debate just north of me. This may be Hilary Clinton’s last stand as she hasn’t won a primary or caucus since the original Super Tuesday. Nor can she be happy that Dave Schuster got reinstated just before the debate on the same channel. But it is hard to feel sorry for her about the pimping comments when she is eager to make light of her husband’s infidelities at the last debate. You really can’t take the moral high ground when you do that. But anyways. Since I am within driving distance (and have a working Cleveland State student ID), if MSNBC, the Democratic Party, or anyone who can hook me up with some tickets, credentials, or get my questions included in the debate, or get me into a Frank Luntz focus group, shout me a holla.

Feed Your iPod vol. XVI: I Hope That I Don't Fall in Love with You

Inexplicably Scarlett Johansson of all people will soon be releasing an album of Tom Waits covers. Thankfully my personal favorite song of his didn’t make her cut. I Hope That I Don’t Fall in Love with You always remind me of closing time circa college in the winter. There is a very cold feeling to the song that really hits on the loneliness of the winter months which we are smack dab in the middle of right now.


I Hope That I Don’t Fall in Love with You - Tom Waits

Press Releases: TBS and the Sci-Fi Channel

Got a few press releases from TBS and The Sci-Fi Channel, combined they are too long so here is a shorter, bulleted version in Laymen’s Terms:

- My Name Is Earl goes into syndication on TBS Mondays at 10:00 and 10:30 starting March 3rd. As I have stated before, the pilot of My Name Is Earl is the funniest half ever in the history of television and the second season’s Our Cop’s is On isn’t that far behind. So if you haven’t seen the show before or a late comer, here is the best way to catch up from the beginning. Of course if you perfer to watch the episodes whenever you want without commercials, you can buy them on iTunes or Amazon Unbox.

- TBS ordered up eight more episodes of the variety show Frank TV which is slated to return later this year. I don’t know about you, but I can’t get enough of fat versions of Jack Nicholson and George Bush. You can download the first season of Frank TV on iTunes.

- Ellen DeGeneres has signed up to host variety specials for both The Comedy Festival, set for November in Las Vegas, and the new five day festival, Just for Laughs: A Very Funny Festival set for Chicago summer 2009 with specials airing on TBS.

- Over on the Sci-Fi Channel, March 5th at 9:00 sees the return of GhostHunters where Jason and Grant investigate the legendary Fort Mifflin in Philadelphia, once the site of bloody battles in both the Revolutionary and Civil Wars. But my personal favorite part of the press release is where it says, “Ghost Hunters is also very successful with young female viewers – on average, the Fall 2007 season outperformed new episodes of CW’s Gossip Girl in over the same 6-week period in Adults 25-54.” Isn’t Gossip Girl what The CW was hoping to be its flash ship program? You can download episodes of GhostHunters on Amazon Unbox

- Premiering right after GhostHunters at 10:00 is Destination Truth where Josh and team set out into the mountains of Nepal to uncover the truth behind the infamous myth of the Yeti, and make the remarkable discovery of what could be three separate footprints left by this elusive creature.

- Then there is BattleStar Galactica which returns April 4th. You can check out the sneak peak for season four over at its YouTube page. Also be on the look out for a special clip with celebrities talking about their favorite BSG moments coming in early March. You can download episodes of Battlestar Galactica on Amazon Unbox as well as the Razor movie.

She Deserves Better Than Him, Better Than Me Too

Oh Mandy, you came and you gave without taking, so I watched License to Wed. And boy did that suck massively. I mean seriously, was I really supposed to laugh at anything in that movie? But anyways. Luckily Ms. Moore redeemed herself with the much more watchable Dedication where Mandy plays an illustrator picked to work with a children’s book writer, Billy Crudup (Almost Famous) with a massive case of OCD whose longtime illustrator, Tom Wilkerson (Michael Clayton) is no longer able to perform the task.

In Dedication, Moore was handpicked to get Crudup to deliver a new book within a month’s time. The relationship between the new partners isn’t a smooth transition as does all he can to break her while the publisher does all he can to make sure she gets the book done on time. And a tall task that is as Crudup doesn’t function well around others. Wilkerson was his best friend and a very loose phrase as theirs was mostly a working relationship.

The film is a romantic in the simplest sense as sparks fly the more time the two spend together, but Crudup’s eccentricities keep you wondering if the two could actually be compatible. Moore, who doesn’t show up in the film for some time, isn’t really the model of normal either as she deals with her mother/land lord (Dianne Wiest) who seems to want to be the latter more than the former. And the shady ex-boyfriend throws in a monkey wrench too. Dedication is much is a much more jarring than most romantic comedy fair in terms of writing, acting, and directing, but it is much easier to sit through than License to Wed.

Dedication gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

I Want My Music Television vol. XIX

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I though I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form so here they are courtesy of YouTube. I advise you to watch them before you read my reviews if you don’t want me to spoil things. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available, if not the link goes to YouTube where you can watch the video in full screen). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.


Flashing Lights - Kanye West



Every new Kanye West video has become a major event almost like when you ran home from school to catch the latest from the likes of Michael Jackson which MTV would air hourly for the entire day. But I haven’t decided if his latest, directed by Spike Jones of all people, is a case of him being too high concept or not high concept enough. And yes, the video was supposed to stop like that and no, there won’t be a sequel or any further explanation (or so ‘Ye would have us believe).


Supernatural Superserious - R.E.M.



It has been awhile since I took the record industry to task, but this may be up their as one of the dumbest. So R.E.M. has a new video out except you can’t embed the video from YouTube. Yet there is a site where you can edit the video at Supernatural Superserious and upload your version to their YouTube page. Except you can embed those (one of which is above) using the same song and much of the same footage. Seriously, why allow one but not the other? But anyways, the song reminds me of something circa the Monster era which coincidently was the last time I was really big into R.E.M., that’s not to say they haven’t has some great songs since.


Hands on Me - Vanessa Carlton



This video from Vanessa Carlton hopefully brought to you from Purell.


I’m Me When I’m With You - Taylor Swift



If there ever a reason not to let a seventeen year old borrow your camcorder, here is the directorial debut from Taylor Swift. And is she really doing the Soulja Boy dance in the video? It may be time to raise the minimum voting age back up.

Some Strange Music Draws Me In

Cover albums are always a shaky proposition, especially when artist try to go outside their comfort zone or genre. Just because you like a song doesn’t necessarily means you can do as good a version yourself (anyone remember the Duran Duran version of White Lines). And it I typically a rule of thumb to stay away from iconic songs as no one what to her a piano version of Smells Like Teen Sprit. Yes I’m talking to you Tori Amos.

For Allison Moorer, she mostly stays away from the most recognizable songs on her album of covers, Mockingbird, with two exceptions. Most notably is Johnny Cash’s Ring of Fire where Moore takes the song back for women (the song was written by Johnny’s future wife June Carter), but it still takes some time getting used to a slowed burning version sans a mariachi band instead replaced by an organ. The other song being Dancing Barefoot, the Patti Smith classic, a song that Moorer can’t quite do justice to a song that mentions heroin.

Moorer does much better with the lesser known songs on the album. Nina Simone’s I Want a Little Sugar in My Bowl is right up her wheelhouse and really lets loose at the end. Same goes for the bluesy Daddy Goodbye Blues (which is extra haunting considering her family history) and the folksy Orphan Train. But she really excels at songs that are closest to her own like the title track and her take on Joni Mitchell’s Both Sides Now.

Song to Download - Mockingbird

Mockingbird gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. XX

Before I get into the best in television from the last week I would like to point out the lack of any correct answers so far in this month’s Lyrics Quiz. I guess since it is guilty pleasures some of you may be embarrassed to admit you know the lyric, but if I can admit that they are on my iPod, you can at the least admit you know the lyrics. Anyone? Anyone at all? I even added hints.

Quote of the Week: Here’s an idea, why don’t we take a gun point it to his big toe, send that little piggy to market. If he still doesn’t want to tell us, move on to the roast beef. Why don’t we do that? (Sawyer, Lost)

Song of the Week: Wait, no George Michael on Eli Stone this week? Did they already bust their music budget on Faith and Freedom?

Big News of the Week: The Writer’s Strike Is Over: Well that was anti-climatic especially since we won’t see any new episodes until at least late March for sitcoms and mid April for dramas. And all seems to be for not as my sources say the writers got a crap deal. But take note to all other union members out there, before you go on strike, think to yourself, “Would Upton Sinclair write about my plight if he were alive today?” If the answer is no, it really isn’t a good idea to go on strike.

Coalition Links of the Week:

Buzz is pitting all of this season's Project Runway looks against each other to figure out which is the most fab. (BuzzSugar)

Eric came up with the Top 5 TV Villains on television today. (Daemon's TV)

With all of this early news about the Fall 08 season, Mikey wonders why How I Met Your Mother still hasn't found an audience after three years on the bubble. (Mikey Likes TV)

Marcia celebrated Valentine's Day by remembering some of television's greatest kisses. (Pop Vultures)

After attending the taping of MTV's America's Best Dance Crew premiere episode, Spads shared tidbits from her conversations with judges JC Chasez, Lil Mama, and Shane Sparks. (RTVW)

Last week, Vance bawled while watching Friday Night Lights. Now he may bawl at the thought of NOT being able to watch any more new Friday Night Lights. (Tapeworthy)

Dan took some time to think about whether he actually liked Eli Stone, or whether it was just the best scripted show still in new episodes. Either way, Jonny Lee Miller's dreamy. (TiFaux)

Jennifer pondered why everyone falls for Boston Legal’s Shirley Schmidt and gushed about Scott Bakula’s visit to the firm. (Tube Talk)

Kate came up with a Gossip Girl drinking game. (TV Filter)

Taking a page from How I Met Your Mother's Barney and his Hot/Crazy Scale, the TV Addict is proud to introduce the Lost Quality/Question Scale! (theTVaddict.com)


Flavor of Love 3: For the previously seasons, the only episodes worth watching were the premiere and the reunion show. But this was by far the least entertain premiere of the three season. Hopefully there will be a Charm School around the corner. You can download Flavor of Love on iTunes.


Welcome to the Captain: Yeah, this isn’t going to get much better. Check out the latest episodes over at Innertube. You can also download or Welcome to the Captain on iTunes.


Survivor: Wow, that may set the record for shady business for the show. What really makes it interesting, not only did the Incredible Hulk looking dude conspired to out Mary, he ended up voting for the old chick. It should be really interesting with the two different tribe members from opposing tribes going to Exile Island this time. This is setting up to be the best season in a long time. Check out the latest episode over at Innertube.




Lost: After seeing the episode I have absolutely no clue what is going on with Sayid’s flash-forward. And that was even before we learned that he is working for Not-Henry. I guess what is really bugging me is that how does a celebrity able to become an assassin? And who is the German chick’s boss? The black dude who approached Hurley? Then is Not-Henry part of the Oceanic 6? I mentioned earlier this week that I bet he got off the island but I am not sure he counts as one on account that he wasn’t on the plane. I also guess that this rules out Not-Henry as my original guess that it was his funeral that Jack attended. From the promo it looks like we may get an answer to how Kate managed to avoid prison which bugged me last year. But considering Sayid large sum, I am going to assume that the combination of celebrity and money is what keeps her out of jail. Check out the latest episode over at ABC.com.




Eli Stone: I never saw the husband and son in on getting the mom out of the National Guard. But one thing that bothered me is that if you are trying to get custody to the mom, why would you let the husband hire the high powered lawyer while the mom is stuck with the incompetent one? Check out the latest episode over at ABC.com. You can also download Eli Stone on iTunes.


Next Week’s Pick: Eli Stone, Thursday at 10:00 on ABC: The episode is entitled Wake Me Up Before You Go Go although after last week’s musicless episode I’m not sure if the song will actually be featured or not. Hopefully they work it in somehow.

Previewing Dexter and the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Video

In a story I broke last week, tomorrow is the network series premiere of Dexter (or tonight depending on when you read this, at any rate, Sunday, 10:00 on CBS). I have already seen it so I really didn’t plan on rewatching it myself, but I was interested on how the edited for television. Granted they didn’t really need to do much in my opinion aside from the occasional expletive or naked breast or bottom side. And much of the gore is more about what you don’t see than what you do (think about the ear cutting scene in Reservoir Dogs where they actually pan away from the act). From these exclusive clips below (unless of course you have seen them elsewhere, but in not, they’re exclusive to you), it doesn’t look like they have cut out much, although considering the Showtime show runs an extra ten or so minutes so something must hit the cutting room floor. Be warned, these clips are not for kids, the faint of heart, or anyone that doesn’t want to see what a body completely drained of blood looks like. For those that do, enjoy.









Now, all the ladies and gay dudes, feel free to skip down to the lyrics quiz below (there still is an overabundance of unanswered one) because the next part is just for the guys. And guys, what a treat I have for you. From today until February 25th, you can download the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Video exclusively, and more importantly free, from Amazon Unbox. Below is a preview of the video and to download the whole video, click, well, “Buy the Unbox video” (and as long as the price still says $0.00 then it is still free). Yeah, I would go as far as to say the Brooklyn Decker is moderlately attractive.

Lyrics Quiz: Guilty Pleasures

Every once in a while I get people asking me what my guilty pleasures are. The only problem with that is I do not have the capacity to feel the human emotion that is guilt. But here is a list of songs, as an accused musical snob, I probably shouldn’t admit to having on my iPod, but alas, I don’t really care if anyone knows. And if you think less of me maybe it is you that has the problem. As always you need to put both artist and title in the comments section (or you can e-mail me) and if you are correct I will un-bold it and give you credit. The Lyrics Quiz is for entertainment purposes only so please do not use anything besides your own meandering mind to help you up with the answers. Now onto the quiz:

Hints:
3. A duet with one singer already i this quiz and the other's song namedropped in a different lyric in this quiz.
7. Not only is this song a guilty pleasure, but it is the theme song to a guilty pleasure television show (not that I ever watched).
10. Fun Fact: this song was written by Lenny Kravitz.
11. Another one of this artist songs certainly isn't about the artist at 21 on account the dude doesn't like chicks that way.
12. Not only is the song on my iPod, I can still do the accompaning dance.
18. This artist had the most acceptable guilty pleasure of last year but I like this classic one.
23. Somwhow this artist has gotten even more theatric since this over the top video for this song.


1. Not just urban she liked the pop ‘cause she was living la vida loca. (Thong Song - Sisqó; guessed by Angie)
2. For the first time in a long time she bowed her head to pray. She said I’m sorry for the way I’ve been living my life. I now I should change. (Jesus Take the Wheel - Carrie Underwood; guessed by Angie)
3. My body’s longing to hold you so bad it hurts inside. Time is precious and it’s ticking away and I’ve been waiting for you all of my life.
4. Smack it up, flip it, rub it down. Oh no! (Do Me! - Bell Biv DeVoe; guessed by Angie)
5. You said that you would treat me right but you was just a waste of time. (Leave (Get Out) - JoJo; guessed by Angie)
6. And I will take you in my arms and hold you right where you belong. (This I Promise You - *NSYNC; guessed by Angie)
7. Let’s go back, back to the beginning, back to when the Earth, the sun, the stars all aligned.
8. Whatever makes me happy sets you free. And I’m thanking you for knowing exactly. (What a Girl Wants - Christina Aguilera; guessed by Angie)
9. Take heed, ‘cause I’m a lyrical poet. Miami is on the scene in case you didn’t know it. (Ice, Ice Baby - Vanilla Ice; guessed by Angie)
10. I want to hold your hand in Rome. I want to run naked in a rain storm. Make love in a train. Cross country.
11. There was blood and a single gun shot. But just who shot who?
12. Now c’mon, what was I supposed to do? He was out of town and his two friends were SO fine.
13. Now I can see that we’re falling apart from the way it used to be. No matter the distance I want you to know that deep down inside of me… (I Want it That Way - Backstreet Boys; guessed by Angie)
14. Last time that we had this conversation I decided we should be friends. But know we’re going round in circles tell me will this déjà vu never end. (Say You'll Be There - Spice Girls; guessed by Angie)
15. You can take that cookie and stick it up your… (Nookie - Limp Bizkit; guessed by Angie)
16. New Kids on the Block had a bunch of hits. (Summer Girls - LFO; guessed by Angie)
17. And in my dreams I kissed your lips a thousand times. Sometimes I see you pass outside my door.
18. Run, Run, Run, Run everybody move run. Lemme see you move and rock it ‘til the grooves done.
19. You look like MC Hammer on crack. (The Humpy Dance - Digital Underground; guessed by Angie)
20. Get back you flea infested mongrel. (Who Let the Dogs Out - Baha Men; guessed by Angie)
21. So baby come to me. Show me who you are. Swing to me like sugar to my heart. (Candy - Mandy Moore; guessed by Angie)
22. I like Angela, Pamela, Sandra and Rita. And as I continue you know they getting sweeter. (Mambo #5 - Lou Bega; guessed by Angie)
23. Secret lovers is what you wanna be. While making love to him, girl, you’re silently calling on me.
24. Blame it all on my roots, I showed up in boots and ruined your black tie affair. (Friends in Low Places - Garth Brooks; guessed by Angie)
25. See I’m a fool in so many ways. But to lose all my senses, that is just so typically me. (Oops! I Did it Again - Britney Spears; guessed by Angie)

Feed Your iPod vol. XV: Have a Little Faith in Me

Here is one for all the lovebirds out there celebrating Valentines Day today (or as I like to call it, Thursday). Two summers ago when writing a long diatribe about Your Song’s I called Have a Little Faith in Me the most romantic song ever, so really there is no better song for a day like today than this.


Have a Little Faith in Me - John Hiatt




Bonus: Have a Little Faith in Me - Mandy Moore




Extra Bonus: Have a Little Faith in Me - Joe Cocker

First (and Second) Impressions: Eli Stone

There are four types of shows I do not watch: shows about doctors, cops or lawyers and anything on Fox. But from the promos for Eli Stone, you could get the sense that the show was going to be the greatest thing ever, or the worst. The show is definitely the latter. And I mean that in a good way. I mean you really can’t expect a lawyer who is haunted by George Michael songs to be the next Wonderfalls; at most you can hope for the next Sledge Hammer!.

What the show excels at is its impeccable casting with a handful of “it’s that guy (gal)” moments in the first two episodes. My list includes Ms. Hendricks, Dr. Abbott (have I mentioned I met him?), Ed Stevens, The Shredder, and Mac’s roommate Parker (who definitely looks better with the short brown hair). Seriously, if Andrew from Buffy The Vampire Slayer shows up I may have to check to see if I also have an aneurysm. That is not to say the cast is perfect, I mean, the chick from Species? Certainly there was someone else out there that does not tower over the lead and is a more convincing human than alien.

Surprisingly the star of the show isn’t the title character Eli Stone, who really seems too nice and a push over to be a successful lawyer, but instead George Michael is the true star. Or at least his music is as his songs, Faith and Freedom were featured in the first two episodes with every episode being named after one his songs. Next week you can expect a Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go themed episode. Although considered that Stone is engaged to the boss’s daughter, I am a little weary for when Father Figure shows up.

The father in question is Victor Garber, finally out of the stuffy father role in Alias and can show his impeccable comic timing especially when he was the on Eli saw singing Freedom. But who could end up being the big scene stealer amongst so many of them is Eli’s acupuncturist who fakes his Chinese accent to get patients. Not so stellar is the writing that goes from hilarious, like when Eli asked his one night stand from college’s son was his for her to respond, “Yeah, I was pregnant for eight years,” to down right boring, like his voice over. It is almost as if the show was written by someone from Friday Night Lights but edited by a staff writer from One Tree Hill.

Verdict: Enjoy it why it last because I rank the chance of Eli Stone filming more episode than it has just slightly above Cavemen’s. But decent idea, great casting, suspect writing, and the post-Lost jinx does not bode well for the show. But as long as cheesy George Michael songs show up I’ll be watching. Eli Stone airs Thursdays at 10:00 on ABC. You can stream recent episodes at ABC.com or download the show on iTunes.

First (and Second) Impressions: Lost

In what may have been a nod to the fanboys, Not-Henry promised to tell Locke anything he wanted to keep him from killing him and the first question Locke asked was at the top of everyone’s list, what the frak is that smoke monster thing. But in true Lost fashion, as everyone sits on the edge of the couches for the answer, Not-Henry said he didn’t know and proceeded to tell Locke every mundane fact about one of the new characters. Wow, all her siblings are chicks. Welcome back Lost, I missed you and your frustrating ways.

Although four seasons in I can’t say I’m that frustrated anymore. I made my peace last year that we are never going to get any answers and the few that we get will be two seasons too late or are so underwhelming I just do not care. And since I stopped caring I can enjoy the show for what it is absurdly funny. Dude takes to a spirit to extort money from a grieving mother. Sure, why not. The Lawnmower Man is convinced that a wedding rich couldn’t possibly fall off after being submerged for weeks. Of course not.

The big news of the first episode is there is an Oceanic Six that make it off the island. And surprisingly, according to voice over promo monkey we actually learn a fourth next week to add to Jack, Kate, and Hurley. Presumably four and five are the person Kate has to get back to (Sawyer), and the person who died (Locke). Which leaves one more; I put my money on Juliet. Of course the thing with Juliet is that she wasn’t actually on the plane so what if there are more people who make it to the mainland. I don’t think that the Others Redux will leave without Not-Henry, so what if ends up being the dead dude (whom I originally predicted)? And maybe there were up to eight people who made it off the island?

Or maybe more. What if Kate isn’t one of them either? You really think the government would let her off the hook for killing a dude and then fleeing the country just because she had to live on a deserted island for a couple months. Maybe she snuck back but Jack and Hurley are letting everyone think she is dead so she doesn’t have to go to jail.

Then the second episode brought in the new question of who are these Others Redux and what’s with the black dude who assembled them? Are they Dharma out for revenge? And how did they get a picture of Not-Henry, has he left the island? How does Desmond, who they also had a picture of, fit into their plans? And why recruit the ghost whisperer, a scientist, an anthropologist, and a nut-job pilot? The most interesting is Charlotte and her dig with the Dharma polar bear. Did Kristen Bell seriously choose to slum it on Heroes with the lame Elle instead of taking this character? And can I possibly ask anymore questions in this post?

Verdict: Like I mentioned earlier, the show is much more enjoyable when you stop caring. I don’t think I have enjoyed two straight episodes since the first season. Lost airs Thursdays at 9:00 on ABC. You can stream the most recent episodes over at ABC.com.

We on Award Tour: 2008 Grammy Awards

In contrast of award shows, The Grammy’s decided to kick off their fiftieth anniversary with Alicia Keys dueting with a youthful Frank Sinatra while MTV decided on their twentieth Video Music Awards to instead go with the train wreck that is Britney Spears. And this is why the Grammy’s keeps getting better and better why the VMA’s has slipped further and further since the last time Chris Rock hosted. And the Grammy’s were wise enough to stick their over hyped train wreck (i.e. Amy Winehouse) near the end of the show just in case it backfired. Here are some other thoughts from last night’s festivities:

- Another reason why the Grammy’s are always worth watching is because they get artists to take their songs in a different direction and that was most evident with the Carrie Underwood, doing her best Nancy Sinatra impression, being backed by Fat Albert’s Junk Yard Band and still made it work.

- Someone should have told Rihanna just because she was performing with The Time didn’t mean she had to get the Morris Day haircut.

- Performance of the night had to go to Kanye West. I actually preferred the slowed down version of Stronger than the album version and it was visually stunning as he brought the Daft Punk pyramid complete with Daft Punk inside. Then Hey Mama was just heart wrenching. Not sure why he continued to wear that glow in the dark vest all night though.

- Too bad John Legend had to slum it with Fergie, couldn’t they let him sing one of his own songs for having to stoop so low.

- I wonder if Cher and Tina Turner had a contest to see who face could move the less last night. When will people realize that you look much creepier with Botox than with wrinkles? Odd that Tina performed a song she help made famous with her ex-husband who just died without a mention. As for the guy who wrote it, I really couldn’t tell if John Fogerty liked the preference or not.

- I don’t remember the show ever performing outside the venue and not only did they have Amy Winehouse perform via satellite, the Foo Fighters performed in the parking lot. Luckily they didn’t spend as much time as last year hyping the My Grammy Moment this year but more Jason Bateman isn’t that bad. And did I miss what exactly the girl won? Aside from being at the front of the stage, it didn’t seem that much prestigious than the rest of the orchestra.

- Yet another reason not to listen to hillbilly music, the song Brad Paisley performed about searching a chick for ticks. And I didn’t think anything would be stupider than the song about how tractors are sexy. My IQ needs to drop about forty points before I can start enjoying those types of songs.

- In a rare misstep in Grammy performances, that was an odd bit from Feist. I’m not for sure, but I think they cut out a verse. Her performance on Saturday Night Live was actually much better and cooler with the massive band and choir she had with her. Really, the “whoa-o-o-o” is the best part. Less people on a bigger stage just didn’t work.

- Speaking of things that didn’t work, Keely Smith (who won the first Grammy) and Kid Rock? Umm, yeah, no.

- Just when I started to get tired of No One, the new spin on it from Alicia Keys made it better again. Performing with Frank Sinatra and John Mayer in the same night? Good work if you can get it.

- Seeing Amy Winehouse singing about not going to rehab when she is on leave from rehab (name dropping her incarcerated husband twice during the song) just makes the performance a little weird. And seeing how she reacted to winning Record of the Year making me wonder if the current treatment is taking.

- Token Old Dude Alert!: Nothing better than an old dude who probably made more last year than I’ll make in my lifetime complain about money.

- Earlier this evening, Grammy’s went to the narrator of Pushing Daisies and Barak Obama who beat out Bill Clinton. No, seriously.

- Will.i.am’s little bit was, um, interesting to say the least.

- And the Grammy for Album of the Year goes to… of, course, the oldest guy in the category. Anyone who says their shock by Herbie Handcock beating out Kanye and Winehouse obviously has never seen the Grammy’s before even if it were the second jazz album to ever win the award.

- My two favorite performences of the night:

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. XIX

Quote of the Week: Everything I know about women you can stick in this damn coffee cup. But I do know you got to have trust and honesty and without trust and honestly it is not gonna work. (Coach Taylor, Friday Night Lights)

Song of the Week: Freddom '90 - George Michael (As performed by Victor Garber and a childrens choir, Eli Stone)

Big News of the Week: Ben Silverman Is a Humongous Tool: Back when I was a freshman, the varsity soccer coach said to me, “Hey you.” Apparently I had a deer in the headlights look because my JV coach said, “Don’t worry, if you were in trouble, he’d know your name.” I bring that up because until Thursday I wouldn’t have been able to distinguish Ben Silverman from Ben Stein or Jonathan Silverman. That was until Jo pointed me to this article from Radar Online (which name dropped my brother Shooter) where a reporter asked about Friday Night Lights to which NBC President Silverman said, “Start watching 30 Rock.” Then proceeds to say no one watches FNL. Um, I’m sorry Benny Boy; I totally missed how 30 Rock was this ratings juggernaut. And most of its few viewers are ones that are just too lazy to switch the channel between My Name Is Earl and The Office. I bet if you put 30 Rock in-between 1 vs. 100 and Las Vegas it would have even less viewers than Friday Night Lights.

In fact I would like to point out that Friday Night Light outsells 30 Rock in Unbox Downloads and FNL season 1 is outselling 30 Rock season 1 in the Amazon DVD store (currently 144 to 407 respectively in overall sales to put things in perspective). And keep in mind Amazon numbers are actual hard numbers of people buying unlike the Neilson Ratings which is a glorified poll that is so shady it doesn’t even release its margin of error.

So everyone out there that watches Friday Night Lights be sure to boycott the Knight Rider movie that comes on sometime soon because if it does well they will be making it into a series for some reason even though the debacle that was resurrecting Bionic Woman should still be fresh in their heads. Do not watch My Dad Is Better Than Your Dad whenever that premieres for the same reason (not to mention it will most likely lower your IQ). You can also sign the Best Week Ever petition. And if you want to express to Silverman why he should keep on the Lights here is address (although you may want to avoid calling him a humongous tool even though he is):

Ben Silverman c/o NBC Studios
3000 W. Alameda Ave.
Burbank, CA. 91523




Coalition Links of the Week:

Buzz wonders how many '80s TV references you can pack into one little Ben Lee music video. (BuzzSugar)

Araya tells us why Friday Night Lights is number 2 on his Top 10 TV Shows list. (Daemon's TV)

Mikey was relieved to see Ricky finally get auf'd on Project Runway, but he still has considerable beefs with the current season. (Mikey Likes TV)

Pop Vultures interviewed writer Eric Estrin and got his perspective on the WGA strike. (Pop Vultures)

To explain her love for Anna Fricke, Rae channeled her Dawson's Creek fangirl of television shows gone by. (RTVW)

Vance skipped The Super Bowl but loved all the super bawling on Friday Night Lights which deserves a bit of that 97 Million Super Bowl football audience. (Tapeworthy)

Jace was all about advance looks at British telly this week, with reviews of new series That Mitchell and Webb Look and Last Restaurant Standing on BBC America. (Televisionary)

Dan interviewed Tonight Show writer Michael Jann about the WGA strike as part of the Adopt a Writer project. (TiFaux)

Jennifer questioned whether Nip/Tuck should be renamed “Nip YUCK,” after the latest developments. (Tube Talk)

Kate picked the five best and five worst looks from this season of Project Runway. (TV Filter)


Welcome to the Captain: Not really the funniest thing I have seen in a while but then again that is what I thought about The Big Bang Theory and it turned into the second funniest thing on television. And a show with George Bluth Sr. and some Hispanic dude named Jesus who pronounces it the Anglo-Saxon way, not the Spanish was has to get better right? You can download Welcome to the Captain on iTunes.


Super Tuesday:It is funny that for months the pundits have been suggesting that the Republican nominee would be decided by a brokered convention but now it is the Republican that have the nominee all but picked and the Democrats are heading for a brokered convention. Not only that, it is plausible that Barak Obama wins more delegates but Hilary Clinton gets the nomination because of the superdelegates (you know because Hilary is pimping out her daughter by making Chelsea call these superdelegates looking for support).

Then all day Saturday, the pundits try to make a big deal out of Mike Huckabee beating John McCain in the Nebraska primary. They all talked about this was conservatives sending a message to McCain but never talked about the real reason: if you are a McCain supporter why bother voting? It is the middle of winter and your candidate is basically a lock why leave your house. I’m not bothering to vote in March in the Republican primary opting to vote in the Democratic one because it will actually mean something.


Lost: Finally got around to watching the first two episodes of the season, but they really deserve their own posts. Look out for that later this week. You can catch up on Lost on iTunes.


Friday Night Lights: Wait, Jason Street nailed that waitress? How did I miss that? And if there were a reason to have another season it is because of his miracle baby. Seriously, only Friday Night Lights can pull off a miracle baby and not make it seem lame (yes I’m talking to you Lost and The X-Files). Anotyher reason there has to be another season is so we can follow Smash down to Whitmore. The scene with him and the two coaches ranks up there as one off the best this season. I’d like Silverman point out any specific scene from 30 Rock better than scene. Check out the latest episodes over at NBC.com.


Promo of the Week: Thanks to the writer’s strike, CBS is importing the Showtime killer drama Dexter to network television premiering next Sunday at 10:00. The show is actually less gruesome so I’m not sure what exactly is going to be cut because the show has a longer runtime than network shows. Below is a promo for the show:



Next Week’s Pick: Flavor of Love 3, Monday at 9:00 on VH1: Okay, to be honest the only reason I am excited about this is because it may mean more contestants for a possible second season of Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School. Although I am really hoping for a Flavor vs. Rock version of Charm School or possibly a Battle of the Sexes with the dudes from I Love New York.