The Hottest Token Hot Chick Pictures of the Week

My sources tell me that Chuck is on the bubble and so I and some other TV bloggers have decided to make a consorted effort to bring to the attention of those that are not watching why they should watch and to the big wigs at NBC (and possibly any other networks that it is worth a Friday Night Lights type deal), that Chuck is worth saving.

For my part I decided to run down the hottest Token Hot Chick Pictures. For those that patron my weekly Best of the Week posts (and the occasional 57 Channels and Only This Is On) ever week I pick the hottest screen cap of the week from the CIA’s finest and here is the best of the best. If any red blooded American boy takes a look at these pictures and doesn’t start watching Chuck immediately, you may want to move to Iowa.

10. Chuck Verses the Crown Vic



9. Chuck Verses the Seduction



8. Chuck Verses the Lethal Weapon



7. Chuck Verses the Imported Hard Salami



6. Chuck Verses the Sandworm



5. Chuck Verses the Beefcake



4. Chuck Verses Tom Sawyer



3. Chuck Verses the Third Dimension (note: the picture is in 3-D if you still have the glasses)



2. Chuck Verses the Fat Lady



1. Chuck Verses the Truth




For more Chuck related articles, head over to Give Me My Remote for the aptly dubbed Chuck vs. the Network Pick Up for those which will be added throughout the week. If you would like to paticipate, you can find out over there. Also many thanks to Strahotski.com where I stole borrowed the above pictures from. And of course you can catch up with Chuck on iTunes, Amazon Video on Demand and/or DVD (and of course Chuck airs Mondays at 8:00 on NBC):

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. LXXIV

Kings: There are very few times I have been watching Lost and just got completely, well, lost, yet I don’t remember how many time during the early going of the show I have found myself scratching my head and wondering just what exactly was going on. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download Kings on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: I am beginning to think that the producers of the show have my crib wired because you can add computing in the air to the list of things Sheldon and I have in common. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Chuck: So the General was worried that Chuck was falling in love with Sarah so she brings in other absurdly hot chick to replace her. Sadly that sound exactly how are government usually solves problems. Had Sarah actually gone back to Langley like she was supposed to, she probably would have been greeted with a multimillion bonus for being incompetent. Or many that is how she got that car. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download Chuck on iTunes.

How I Met Your Mother: Speaking of shows that may be spying on me, I can’t count the number of times I have said “I’m getting too old for this ish” over the past half decade. Granted I was too lazy to put all of them down in list form. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

I Love Money: How dumb do you have to be to be called the dumbest player in the history of VH1 reality show and to have It of all people sing a song about how stupid you are? You can also download I Love Money on iTunes.

100 Greatest One Hit Wonders of the 80’s: When I first heard VH1 was doing this countdown I though how could they find that many. But not only did I recognize about 90% of the songs and half are actually on my iPod. Granted I can grip about the ranking and how some are not legit one hit wonder (c’mon, Twisted Sister had a second hit, I Wanna Rock anyone?).

Trust Me: With the twofer this week it is hard not to think how much better the season would have been if they were more like these two episodes. I guess beer is more interesting than cell phones. You can also download Trust Me on iTunes.

Lost: I’m glad we got a Back to the Future reference this week because for me, that is the gold standard when it comes to time travel. And Hurley and Miles Who’s on First routine was the best meeting of the minds on the show thus far. While Ben being revived to become “one of us” as Richard Alpert put it, adds credence to my theory as to why he and Locke aren’t flashing now. But that still leaves Sun and Lapidus. You can stream current episodes over at ABC.com.



Survivor: Yet another season where the Token Hot Chick doesn’t make it to the jury. Guess it is time to pour out some Cristal and cue up It’s So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube.



Friday Night Lights: One of the many things that puts the show head and shoulders above the rest is the amount of great monologues on Friday Night Lights from Coach’s halftime and postgame speeches to Tyra’s carried confession to her college essay. Although I am a little scared of what could possibly be coming next week now that the playoffs are over. I have a feeling redistricting won’t be going smoothly. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com.



DogTown: If you are interested in the dogs featured this week, you can check out their profiles on the Best Friends website. Click the link to go to their specific page. Ava (the golden retriever whose paw got caught in a bear trap), Haley and Hana (the Ethiopia refugees), and Hugo (the biting bloodhound).

You can also check out my First Impressions of Greek and the latest round of Playing the Percentages.

Best of the Week vol. XV

Quote of the Week: Back to the Future, man. We came back in time to the island and changed stuff. So if Little Ben dies he’ll never grow up to be Big Ben who’s the one that made us come back here in the first place. Which means we can’t be here and therefore dude, we don’t exist. (Hurley – Lost)

Song of the Week: Bottle Pop – The Pussycat Dolls featuring Snoop Dogg (Chuck)

Big News of the Week: Friday Night Lights gets a Fourth and Fifth Season: There was some nail-biting last week, but word broke Monday that we will be getting at least twenty-six more episodes of the football drama. Like before, DirecTV will get the first run with NBC airing it at a later date. Unfortunately it looks the show will be without the Betty/Veronica debate of the new Millennium with both Tyra and Lyla set to go off to college.

But when Friday Night Lights is airing its fifth season, will Jay Leno still be on? If the NBC affiliates have their way, maybe not as a Boston station (which is ironically Leno’s hometown) has announced they won’t be airing the talk show instead having the news at 10:00. NBC shot back by saying it would be a breach of contract and would pull their affiliate status. Actually, at this rate Jay Leno may be off the air by the time Friday Night Lights airs its fourth season on the Peacock network.

Gratuitous Token Hot Chick Picture of the Week:



Coalition Links of the Week:
As ER said its goodbye, Buzz thought back over her favorite memories of the show and asked you to share your own. (BuzzSugar)

Are you ready to laugh even more on Thursday nights? Check out my review of the new NBC comedy Parks and Recreation starring Amy Poehler and Rashida Jones. (Give Me My Remote)

Vance thinks the producers and judges are trying way too hard to fix the competition on American Idol, especially when it's so obvious that Kris Allen and Allison Iraheta are far better than Adam Lambert, Danny Gokey and Lil Rounds. (Tapeworthy)

This week, Jace took an early look at next week's episode of Chuck (Chuck Versus the Dream Job), which features guest stars Scott Bakula and Chevy Chase. (Televisionary)

Marisa participated in a chat with SNL's Will Forte and Arrested Development's Mitch Hurwitz on their new animated project Sit Down Shut Up. (TiFaux)

Matt is glad ER has ended. Because he's seen Southland, and it's great. (TV Fanatic)


Free Download of the Week: Pilot - Southland (iTunes): In a story I broke yesterday, you could stream the new cop drama over at NBC.com, but for those that like to watch things on the even smaller screen, you can download the first episode for free before it even airs.

Deal of the Week: Earth Day: Save up to 50% on DVDs and Blu-ray Discs (Planet Earth, The Blue Planet, An Inconvenient Truth)

Video of the Week:

Criteria


Next Week Pick of the Week: Recue Me, Tuesday at 10:00 on FX: I will have a full write up in the next couple days on the new season of Rescue Me, but let me point out that all four season of the show, as well as all of last summer’s minisobes are currently available on Hulu. Above was my favorite one.

Around the Tubes vol. VI

I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on Explorer: Inside Guantanamo, Southland, Harper’s Island, The Day the Day Stood Still, and Geiko.


- Coming up this Sunday, National Geographic is taking you inside the Guantanamo Bay prison, a name we have all heard but have never seen. Below is a clip.




- Last night was the final episode of ER ever and next Thursday at 10:00 the show is being replaced by the new show Southland. But why wait until then to watch the series premiere when you could head over to NBC.com right now and watch the entire first episode?


- Also premiere next Thursday at 10:00 but on CBS is Harper’s Island about a murder mystery. No pre-premiere streaming but the show has been airing webisobes since mid-March and is currently up to three. Head over to Harper’s Globe for those and other content updated daily. I may or may not have more on the show later, but until then, the show even has a wedding invite that is happening on the show:



- Coming this Tuesday is the DVD and Blu Ray release of The Day the Earth Stood Still starring Keanu Reeves as an alien. Seems right. The movie also stars Kyle Chandler so it may be watchable. Luckily the special editions are loaded including a Digital Copy, the 1951 version of the film, deleted scenes, featurettes, picture-in-picture commentary, a “Build Your Own Gort” feature (Blu Ray only) and more. To celebrate the release of the DVD, they have created thetrailofdestruction.com where you can send videos to your friends of an alien force destroying building, even your friends house.



- I really don’t mind commercials as long as they are entertaining and Geiko is usually a hit with their Geiko gecko (unlike their Caveman campaign which was usually a miss). And now the gecko is hitting the Information Superhighway appearing with some YouTube superstars. The one out right now is with the Numa Numa guy which had me laughing even if they ruined a truly great Rockwell song.

Numa Numa Guy with Gecko, Somebody's Watching Me

I Want My Music Television vol. XLVII

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I though I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.


Chocolate Box – Prince and Q-Tip



For a man who has converted to the Jehovah’s Witness and sworn off his dirty side, Prince still likes his phallic symbolisms and phrases that have potential double means. But hey, you can get his three latest CD’s for $11.95 at Target. I wonder what Kristen Wiig would have to say if your brought the triple disk to her counter.


Crazier – Taylor Swift



Listening to song you can tell why Taylor Swift saved this song for The Hanna Montana Movie, which I think I may skip to avoid a run in with Chris Hansen, instead of putting it on her latest album as it would have been the weakest track.


Gifted - N.A.S.A. featuring Kanye West, Santogold and Lykke Li



N.A.S.A. is like a mash up artist that can actually get the artist to perform together on a song together. Unfortunately for the most part the concept proves better than the execution.


Don’t Forget – Demi Lovato



This song reminds he of the Jonas Brothers Lovbug; it is bouncy and hides the singer’s limited vocal range, in this case fellow Mouseketeer Demi Lovato. But the breakdown in Don’t Forget is much better if only because the backing band is hilarious especially the when they freeze in place at the end of it. So what if they are all playing guitar and no bassist, it just looks cool

He's on Fire

With all the basketball I watched last month got me thinking of the greatest basketball game of all time (and really the only one I’ve ever liked) NBA Jam, this month’s inductee into the Scooter Hall of Fame. I have owned three different copies in my life, for the Super Nintendo, and both Playsyation’s. Hopefully when I finally upgrade to a next generation console, there will be a new version of the game waiting for me (sadly there isn’t one yet).

What makes NBA Jam great, and sets it apart from other basketball titles, is that it is a simple two on two arcade style game that isn’t bound to the five on five rules that just don’t translate well to console games. And since it isn’t bound to any rules there are plenty of fun modes like if one of your player hit three straight shot he is “on fire.” And I mean that quite literally as he is engulfed in flames and his shots burn the nets off the rims and allows that player to score from pretty much anywhere on the court, from half court to the stands to even from behind the basket.

Oddly enough the most unstoppable player in the game was Gheorghe Mureşan of the Washington Bullets and if you went with Big Head Mureşan, your opponent would just quit knowing there was no way to beat them unless they broke out Big Head Shawn Bradley. Even then your chances were not good. In my dorm in college, there was a big screen television in our lobby and we would always talk about the elusive four way Big Head Mureşan on the big screen but sadly we never hooked up the Playstation to it for fear that the TV couldn’t handle all that Mureşan. Maybe when I upgrade to the HDTV, we can hold a reunion and finally hold our four way Big Head Mureşan game.

First Impressions: Greek 2.5

It’s time to go back to college… in March. Only on ABC Family. Not to mention it is technically half way through the second season of Greek. Of course, milking extra DVD money, it will most likely be labeled as “Chapter Four”. Small details aside, Greek, in its first three “chapters” was more satisfying than not and left with one big cliffhanger as Frannie defected taking many of the pledges last year with Rebecca Logan stuck in the middle.

And in true drama fashion we get a bunch of plot twist as they resolve the cliffhanger with Rebecca being inducted into ZBZ only to show up with Frannie’s Iki sorority only to find out that Ashleigh had Rebecca become a mole for ZBZ to spy on their rush. How Alias of them. Stay tuned to see if Rebecca pulls off the elusive double cross as Casey finds out this was all a sinister plan where Frannie wanted ZBZ to think Rebecca was a mole. And if we are lucky there will be a steal chair involved in the swerve.

As for the other Cartwright, it took a little too long for Rusty and Dale to shack up when it became pretty clear early in the episode it would end up like that. But it did led to some funny Canadian jokes by the bigoted Dale and the slumber party in Casey’s boyfriend’s room was the highlight of the episode. And hopefully with her name on the lease where the boys are living at, we get more Casey/Dale interaction this season.

The one disappoint of the episode was the misuse of Ken Marino (Party Down) as Rusty’s summer boss. His reactions to all of Rusty’s miss wording were priceless and left me hoping the whole episode would have been devoted to everyone’s summer. The short segment with Marino made me think what a great spin-off with him at Tiny Pines would make for its own watchable series.

Greek airs Mondays at 8:00 on ABC Family. You can stream recent episodes over at ABCFamily.com. You can also download Greek on iTunes.

Playing the Percentages vol. IV

It is time for another round of the game sweeping the interwebs, Playing the Percentages. Along for the ride again is Jo. If you want to play the home game, just drop your thoughts in the comments or leave a comment on a question you would like to be answered at a later date. Now let us play the game where I will play the role of Sayid Jarrah with Jo playing the role of a young Ben Linus.

What chances do you give Chuck and Sarah ever hooking up?

Scooter: This is really less a question of Chuck and Sarah ever getting it on, because as we have seen, given the time, everyone on television hooks up given the time. So it is more of a question of will Chuck the show be around long enough for them to hook up, or will it happen this season. Since Ben Silverman is certainly a candidate for a spot on Celebrity Tool Academy, you really can’t gauge him on anything unless it is a reality program or foreign show he can import. And him coming out recently and befuddlingly blaming Barack Obama for the show’s recent lows in the ratings department almost sounded like he is already making excuses to why it won’t be coming back. But still there is a chance they could hook up this season and I put that at 15%.

Jo: I'm torn between what I think will happen and what I want to happen. Scooter and I discussed who’s more at fault for Chuck and Sarah being apart. I think Chuck should man up; he thinks Sarah has shot him down too much. I want Chuck to man up, especially if the General is finally going to properly train him. But the chances of that being this season are so low. If I pick 14%, does that make me like the punk at the end of the row on the Price is Right? I think there's a higher chance of someone in Chuck's non-spy life finding out his secret. I'll put that at 25%.


What are the chances we get a fourth and fifth season of Friday Night Lights?

Scooter: This should be a slam dunk; the show is getting comparable ratings to last year even with a lead-in of Howie Do It repeats most of them time plus DirecTV is footing half the bill. But again, Ben Silverman isn’t sharpest tool in the shed even if he is the biggest. And though the network is becoming all Jay Leno all week long, they should be able to cram in thirteen episodes during the doldrums of winter like they did this season so I will be cautiously optimistic at 75%.

Jo: Again, I'm dying for FNL to return to give me more opportunities to be an extra on the show. Oh that and it's one of the BEST written and acted shows on television. But leave it to NBC to do something stupid--50%.

Scooter: Speaking of Friday Night Lights and Chuck, if it is on the chopping block, why not have Chuck pull a Friday Night Lights and have shop a deal around the other networks (such as USA, because I’m sure characters like Casey, Lester and Jeff would be welcome) then a truncated FNL could replace a shortened season of Chuck or vice versa on Fridays early 2010 giving you 26 weeks of quality programming next year?

Jo: Meanwhile, they SHOULD shop Chuck around. USA would be a great fit, not to mention Sci-Fi since Chuck is very similar to a short lived show called Jake 2.0.

(Scooter Update: The AP is reporting that Friday Night Lights has officially been picked up for two seasons. No word from NBC or DirecTV yet.)

(Scooter Update II: On the NBC.com Friday Night Lights it says congratulations on the renewal so it looks like to be official. Here is the NBC press release.)


It premieres tomorrow, what are the chances that the Cupid remake is a good as the original?

Scooter: I remember seeing the original Cupid but don’t remember being all that upset that it was canceled so the bar isn’t that high. From the promo’s it just looks as if Bobby Canivale is doing a Jeremy Pivin impression and in the other main roll, Sarah Paulson for Paula Marshall is a downgrade. I want it to be higher, but I really cannot go higher than 31%.

Jo: I never watched the original either. I have much faith in Rob Thomas, but remakes generally (BSG, a major exception) tank. I'll go 25%.

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. LXXIII

Before I get into this week’s 57 Channels, let me remind you that you can enter the My Boys Giveaway contest, click the banner at right to see the rules and how to enter.

Kings: Silas’ continual flip flopping on if he is pro or anti David is really going overboard. In three hours he has flipped about ten times already. But let’s move on to what may be the best part of the show in the palace guards who are turing into the Rosencrantz and Guildenstern of the show. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download Kings on iTunes.

Chuck: Two things about the past episode; 1) How dare the general besmirch Reagan. 2) Not only do I not think that Orion is dead but I would put money on Orion being Chuck’s long lost dad. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download Chuck on iTunes.

Survivor: Stupid recap show. Actually I didn’t mind if the guide had not said someone was going to get voted off. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube.



Lost: Oh my God, Sayid killed Ben! I know Bed should be stopped, but I thought kidnapping and/or brainwashing would have been sufficient. Of course not that I believe for a second that little Ben is actually dead or at the very least remain dead. And here’s a new theory for you: The reason why Locke, Ben, Sun, and Lapidus are not warping is because they were all “reborn” on the island at sometime. You can stream current episodes over at ABC.com.



My Name Is Earl: Now there was a plot twist I didn’t see coming even if after it was revealed a Joy I realized that the young Joy actress had portrayed her before (sans the pink hair). And it was nice for Randy to get some lovin’ on the show for once. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download My Name Is Earl on iTunes.

Friday Night Lights: I cannot count the number of goose bumps I got during this episode, from Lyla getting into Vanderbilt, Riggins taking her to church, Riggins blocking the punt (not that he would ever be part of the punt rush), to coach confronting Mr. McCoy in the rain and I am sure I am missing some scenes. And to juxtapose all that drama against things like Mindy’s quite literal wedding shower and Buddy and his crew doing their own redistricting (which should make for a great fourth season plot point). With all the goodness I am willing to overlook Dillon playing the State semi-finals in the rain again. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com.



DogTown: If you are interested in the dogs featured this week, you can check out their profiles on the Best Friends website. Click the link to go to their specific page. Mei Mei (the Chihuahua from the puppy mill), Charro (the Labrador with cancer), and Gertie (the Shih Tzu also saved from the puppy mill).

Best of the Week vol. XIV

Before I get into the Best of the Week, let me remind you that you can enter the My Boys Giveaway contest, click the banner at right to see the rules and how to enter.

Quote of the Week: A 12-year-old Ben Linus brought me chicken-salad sandwich. How do you think I'm doing? (Sayid, Lost)

Song of the Week: Making Love Out of Nothing at All – Air Supply (Chuck)

Big News of the Week: I’m Sorry Eric Cantor, You’re just a Tool: I spent a lot of time bashing Barack Obama last week, but the Republicans were quick to show that the democrats aren’t the only morons in Washington. The Republican Whip Eric Cantor not only passed the Presidents latest television interruption, but instead spent Tuesday at a Britney Spears concert.

And when you think a story about a conservative Congressmen going to a Brittney concert can’t get any stranger, he tried to explain himself. Apparently the same night as the Spears concert, the Truckers Association hosted a money raising event in the box at the Verizon Center. So not only did Cantor take in the Circus tour, he did so with a bunch of trucker. About the show, Cantor told CNN, “I hand it to the performer, she was something.” Ladies and gentleman of Virginia’s 7th Congressional District: your United States Representative!

Gratuitous Token Hot Chick Picture of the Week:



Coalition Links of the Week:
American Idol contestants keep getting criticized for their song choices, so Buzz whipped up a few guidelines to help the singers make their picks. (BuzzSugar)

Is it Vance or is The Real World: Brooklyn actually watchable this year? 11 episodes in and Vance doesn't really feel compelled to smack anyone yet. Prank yes, smack no. (Tapeworthy)

This week, Jace took an early look at the two-hour pilot of Sci Fi's new drama series Caprica, the prequel to Battlestar Galactica. (Televisionary)

Marisa's not ashamed of her school girl crush on Demitri Martin. He can totally rock the neck brace. (TiFaux)

Considering the casting of Ian Somerhalder and Paul Wesley, Matt thinks The Vampire Diaries will be as big as Twilight. Not that he's ever seen that movie. (TV Fanatic)

This week, theTVaddict.com put together our ultimate guide to TV stars on Twitter. (The TV Addict)

Free Download of the Week: Sub Pop Sampler (Amazon MP3): Most people remember Sub Pop as the record label that launched the grunge era. But the label has gotten more mellow in recent years as this sampler featuring Iron & Wine, Fleet Foxes and the comedy due Flight of the Concords. If the eleven tracks aren’t enough free for you, look at the Next Week's Pick of the Week.

Deal of the Week: TV Under $15 (The Lone Gunmen, Bionic Woman, Dog Whisperer)

Video of the Week: Despite getting a promotion, you almost have to feel sorry for Conan O'Brien. He is basically in a lose-lose situation thanks to his network undercutting him by still having Jay Leno as his lead in even when he takes over the The Tonight Show. Adn when NBC gave Leno a promo during the Super Bowl, the only commercial Conan got was a Bud Light one. But at least he can reest in the solace his ad is much better than Leno's and features the talents of Ice-T, Paul Rudd and Adam Sandler. That and he will get one of the biggest buy-outs when Leno wants his gig back.



Next Week Pick of the Week: Greek, Monday at 8:00 on ABC Family: Just when you thought Mondays couldn’t get more crowded, here comes the return of the best cable series not named Rescue Me (much more on that show next week). Considering the last season ended with Frannie coup of creating her own sorority and siphoning off most of the pledges, the new season should start off with a bang. If you forget or just want a refresher of the season finale, iTunes is letting you download it for free, as well as last season’s premiere episode, and in HD.

Contest: My Boys Giveaway and Season Three Preview

(Scooter's Note: This contest has ended. Congratulations to Emily in New York for winning the signed poster.)

This coming Tuesday (March 31) sees the return of TBS’s My Boys and in honor of the third season I have a poster autographed by the whole cast which you can see at right (click to enlarge, autographs will be added later). Answer the following question to enter the contest.

Since the show takes place in Chicago, what is your favorite historic monument or building in the city?

You can e-mail your entries to ScooterKSU(at)aol(dot)com (subject: My Boys). You can also get a bonus entrée f you link the contest; make sure you let me know you did in your e-mail where so you get credited with an entry. The contest ends Tuesday, April 7 at 11:59 PM EST. The winner will be picked at random from all eligible entries and will be contacted shortly after. Also this contest is only open to people with shipping addresses in the United States.

If you would like to double (or triple) up your chances of winning, I have noticed the good people over at Give Me My Remote and Pass the Remote are also running the same contest.

As for the show itself, the third season My Boys starts right where they left out at Bobby’s estate the day before his marriage to the nanny, Elsa. You may remember Bobby coming to PJ’s room the night before the wedding only to find her with his brother. Now something big happens in the first episode that I am forbidden by law to talk about which basically takes up the whole episode so there really isn’t anything I can say about it except the guys engage in a lengthy, and very funny contest that provides many of the episodes best line.

By the second episode, PJ has found herself a new beau except she has decided to keep it from her boys, and even Stephanie, which naturally doesn’t sit well with them. They decide to go undercover and of course hilarity ensues (just not as much as when the Nerd Herd had their stake out when Anna got a new boyfriend). And later in the season, the new relationship is put to the test when he joins PJ’s board game decathlon team. Check out below for a preview of the premiere:




My Boys airs Tuesdays at 10:30 on TBS. You can stream select episodes of the show over at TBS.com. You can also download previous seasons of My Boys on iTunes.

Previewing Locked Up Abroad

Remember back in the nineties where there was that kid that got caught spray painting graffiti in Singapore and it got national headlines because the government wanted to give him six lashes and even got referenced in songs by Ice Cube and “Weird Al” Yankovic? Well imaging they took Michael Fay’s trials and tribulations and made it into a series and you would get Locked Up Abroad premiering Wednesday April 1 on the National Geographic Channel.

What is cool about the show is that it is entirely told through the stories of those who lived through the ordeals who provide the narration and those are the only voices you hear aside from the occasional line from the actors reenacting the situation. The stories range anywhere from kidnappings, to home invasions, to those locked up in a prison.

The later is what you will see tonight as two British citizens get caught with cocaine going through a Peruvian airport. And if you have seen previous episodes, this will be a familiar story as this isn’t the first drug mule story the show has profiled (and looking forward to future episode synopsis, it won’t be the last). What sets this case apart, and dudes take note, is that only one of the travelers was aware that they were transporting drugs as the chick offered up a free trip to Cuzco and didn’t let him in on her extracurricular activities landing them both in prison. And to add insult to injury, the male prisons are much worse than the female ones.

You know things don’t go well for the guy when he says, “Sarah’s not only destroyed my life, she’s also destroyed my faith in humanity.” Ouch. I don’t think there are much harsher words in the English language he could have said. And you see the twist at the end of the episode you will completely understand why he says that.

Oh, and have I mentioned that there is gratuitous nudity in the premiere? Unfortunately not the kind I enjoy. Check out a clip (that does not have gratuitous nudity) below:



Locked Up Abroad airs Wednesday at 10:00 on the National Geographic Channel.

First Impressions: Better Off Ted

Whoever said that you can’t judge a book by its cover is a moron. If you see Fabio on the cover you are getting some chick-lit porn, if it is draped in the American flag it is going to be political. In fact, if you are unable to judge the book by its cover, whoever came up with the cover art should be blacklisted.

With that said, everything I needed to know about Better of Ted, I learned from the title because if that is the best title they could come up with, it is doubtfully they could come up with twenty minutes of funny. So I watched Gary Unmarried instead last Wednesday (I do understand the irony considering my initial premise) but ended up giving it a try after all of the Arrested Development comparisons.

Which I could see if Arrested Development was void of anything funny. Of course it wasn’t. Just because they pluck Lindsay Bluth-Fünke and have a narrator that routinely breaks the fourth wall does not make a strong comparison. The big difference between the two shows is that, despite all the bad things they do, most of the Bluths were still likeable whereas the Better Off Ted cast are annoying at their despicable doings save for the two scientist. But still I rarely chuckled at any of their antice where the Bluths were good for at least two you have to rewind because you missed something because you were laughing too hard moments.

Now maybe the biggest problem was they burned off many of their jokes in the advertisements that the channel ad nausea (I had the same problem with The Big Bang Theory) but I would still Sheldon Cooper over the lab rats Veridian Dynamics. And on Wednesday at 9:00, I would even take Louis Brooks over them.

You can stream episodes of Better Off Ted over at ABC.com. You can also download the show on iTunes or though Amazon Video on Demand (see below):

You Don't Know Fear Kid, You've Never Worked with Sam Raimi

Bruce Campbell is a national treasure even if most of the nation doesn’t know who he is despite appearing in all three Spider-Man movies (granted he played three different characters). But he was part of my formative years thanks to Army of Darkness and The Adventures of Brisco County Jr. Really, if the MTV Movie Awards were still hip and relevant, they would have giving him, or at the very least Ash, the Lifetime Achievement Award.

It is the cult like following that is the basis of My Name Is Bruce where Campbell plays the title character, himself. His exaggerated version of himself is a callow, egomaniacal hack who is hated by his co-workers, his ex-wife, and his agent (Ted Raimi in one of his three roles). The only people that don’t hate him are his legions of fans, but he’s working on alienating them too. But it is one zealous fan who just so happened to unleash the Chinese war deity Guan Di that figures the one person that could help him would be the star of Evil Dead and Maniac Cop 2.

But when the fan kidnaps Campbell, he goes along with it thinking it is an acting gig set up by his manager. And then the hilarity ensues. One drawback of My Name Is Bruce is the fake real life Bruce doesn’t exactly live up to the humor or wit of his onscreen version like Ash. And you wish for more catchphrases that you come to expect from Bruce characters. But this movie makes up for it in the terms of musical numbers and has plenty of in-jokes for the hard core Bruce fans and a few cameos from Evil Dead alums.

The big draw to the My Name Is Bruce DVD are the extra like the behind the scenes documentary that is almost as long as the movie itself. There is also a behind the scenes look at the movie within a movie that Bruce is filming, as well as a trailer for the fake flick included.

My Name Is Bruce gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

Previewing Heckle U

I may not have had a very good first weekend, but I can rest in the solace that I am beating Bachalk Obama. For those of you going through some March Madness withdrawal, staring at your clock hoping it is Thursday already, you will want to check out CBS’s new online series Heckle U. It is a mocumentary following two hecklers who couldn’t make it as athletes or even mascots. It stars Owen Benjamin (The House Bunny) as Chance, Kirk Fox (Forgetting Sarah Marshall) as Darrell, and featured Tom Arnold (Soul Plane) as Lou the Bartender. I laughed more during the first episode than I did during certain network sitcom debuts recently. Head over to CBS.com to see the first episode and check out three heckling rules presented by the duo below.










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57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. LXXII

The Big Bang Theory: Episodes that have Sheldon and Penny together for a lengthy portions never disappoint and this was no exceptions. Leonard walking in on them singing was the best. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

I Love Money 2: God bless Bones, trying to convince morality ton a French stripper. Of course he had no chance. Which begs the question, why does such a religious guy go on a reality show to try to date New York? You can also download I Love Money on iTunes.

Gary Unmarried: Wasn’t that the same teacher that beat the crap ou of Gary the last time we saw her? I guess she likes dudes who can take a punch even if he were two timing them. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube.

Lost: When everybody initially thought of Sun when it was mentioned that someone saw the pilot row off with a woman I scoffed thinking she had to have warped with the other and was stuck somewhere with Sayid because there was no way they could explain coherently why Sun didn’t flash but the other did. And of course I underestimated the absurdity of Lost.

But after racking my brain I actually came up with a theory as to why some people warp and some do not. Here it goes: Those born on the island do not warp. Now if you remember back to the season premiere everyone assumed that Miles was the baby of the Dr. Candle, but what if it was actually Sun?

Now there are some holes in my theory namely why doesn’t Ben not flash if he were born off the island and if the baby wasn’t Miles then why did he get a nosebleed before, say, Juliet. But it does sorta solve the why isn’t Locke warping in that he was “reborn” on the island. You can stream current episodes over at ABC.com.



My Name Is Earl: Holy Betty White sighting! And who knew she was such an evil witch? Granted it took me most of the episode to finally realize that yes, that was her. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download My Name Is Earl on iTunes.

Friday Night Lights: Poor Lyla, to learn that her father lost her college fund and to add even more insult, he lost it during a meeting in the Landing Strip while destroying the joint. But if she somehow finds her way to college next year, I may be okay if Madison joins the cast next year. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com.