Remember the catchphrase from what I think was the eighth installment of the Lethal Weapon franchise when Danny Glover (or was it Mel Gibson) said, “I’m getting too old for this (expletive deleted)!” Well that is how I have felt after ever Video Music Awards since, um, when was the last time Chris Rock hosted? But I thought this year was different when the show was announced thanks to scheduled performers Lily Allen and Amy Winehouse. Apparently MTV got word of this and since they have been trying very hard to keep anyone that is actually older than they are, both ended up not being able to make it to the show.
And so went the interest as most anyone who isn’t a fourteen year old white girl that still thinks Fall Out Boy are cool. But in the end I guess it is good that neither made it because they probably would have just been relegated to singing for thirty second with Mark Ronson before MTV cut to commercial. Seriously, if I wanted to hear less than a minute of a song I’d watch TRL. Eighteen different acts were featured but only five get to perform a full song. Why bother? Apparently you can watch all the suite performances at MTV.com but you might as well wait until someone rips the best to mp3. Here are some other thoughts on the show:
- We start off with the fairly worthless pre-show where they roll out John Norris again. Did this guy sign some sort of life-long contract? MTV has a stricter age limit than Menoudo yet he still gets rolled out every year with his boyband circa 1999 haircut. And there is something to say that even though T.I. was in the building, he didn’t bother to show up for the chick from the Pussycat Dolls performance, who relied heavily on guided vocals, even though he appeared on the song.
- The big show started of with the much hyped Britney Spears performance and despite with expectations were so low she could walk over the bar, she still found a way to slither under it. Now I have never watched America’s Got Talent, but her performance is what I would imagine what a Britney impersonator’s that was let on the show just so the Hoff would have something to laugh at would look like. She didn’t bother to lip-sync half the time and was a half to full step behind her back up dancers half the time and looked lost half the time. But I guess it would be hard to remember the steps and to move your lips when you spent three minutes trying to hold in your gut. Note to Britney: fat people don’t walk around in their bra and panties. Yeah you could have pull that look off thirty pounds ago but you now either need to put some clothes on or work in a thousand sit ups a day.
- MTV seriously dropped the ball with the opening. They usher out a train wreck that hasn’t been musically relevant for half a decade for an embarrassing performance when they should have convinced Vanessa Hudgens open the show asking the crowd, “heard any good jokes lately?” (Thanks to everyone who pointed out why people she all the sudden became the most popular search to the 9th Green). Everyone would have talked around the watercooler today how great the opening was instead of how horrible it was. Well actually most of the watercooler talk today was, “wait, the VMA’s were last night?”
- Apparently MTV had a contingency plan in case the Brittney performance died like it did with Sarah Silverman coming out to make fun of her. Granted the best line was, “that’s not nice calling Madonna a python” as well as her backhanded comments to Paris Hilton who once again tried to look upset before breaking out laughing.
- Rihanna wins the Monster Single of the Year as well as the monster cleavage of the year award.
- Jennifer Hundson (as Alicia Keys calls her) comes out to give the most worthless award of the night, the quadruple threat award. Since when is having a clothing line a threat?
- Holy Pat Smear sighting!
- Kanye West and 50 Cent come out to hype their release date. I have said this before and I will say it again, for the love of hip-hop be sure to pick up Graduation this week so 50 retires for coming in second. Anyone find it interesting that no one even mentions Kenny Chesney who has a legitimate chance to outsell either of the rappers. Don’t underestimate the buying power of hillbillies. But any ways. Be sure to look out for my Kanye review tomorrow and 50 on Wednesday.
- Forty-five minutes into the award show and we get our first full performance by Chris Brown who did a much better job lip-syncing that Britney. But that really say much about it. But is does say something that Rihanna stole the show from him.
- Justin Timberlake’s music sucks massively and acts like a complete tool ninety-five percent of the time but I like his blast at MTV and their reality programming while accepting an award from The Hills (but I’d like to state for the record that I would definitely stand underneath the brunette’s umbrella-ella-ella-eh-eh-eh). But then lost points when saying that The Simpsons were part of MTV’s reality programming.
- Seriously, Cee-Lo singing Prince while being backed by the Foo Fighters only gets thirty seconds of airtime?
- I must take this time to apologize to CBS for creating the most appalling reality show ever with Kids Nation. I didn’t realize MTV would counter with A Shot of Love with Tila Tequila (whoever that is), your token Bachelor rip-off but with sixteen lesbians and straight dudes. But there is something to say that both channels are owned by the same company (keep in mind this is also the same company that axed Veronica Mars).
- Are we really supposed to believe Shia LeBeouf didn’t really have express written consent to reveal the new Indiana Jones title (Kingdom of the Crystal Skull). That is just insulting our intelligence.
- Who keeps inviting Pamela Anderson to these things? She and Carmen Electra should be well into their begging to get on the Surreal Life point in their life but somehow they still get on big name events. What’s worst is supposedly she is the reason for the most interesting thing that happened all night (Kid Rock sucker punching Tommy Lee) and MTV didn’t even bother to air it.
- Speaking of overrated chicks, Megan Fox may be one of the few people that rival Anderson in that category. She announces Timbaland who does some weird thing before tossing it to Linkin Park. What was that? Why even bother? Why not just have Fox toss to Linkin Park. Timbaland is just completely worthless.
- During the pre-show Rihanna mentioned she was going to rock out tonight and I thought maybe she would be backed by New Order (Shut Up and Drive samples Blue Monday), but now it is just Fall Out Boy who just took home Best Group. Yawn.
- Alicia Keys adds some class to program even if she was wearing that looked like Olivia Newton-John combined her wardrobe from the final scene from Grease and the Physical video. The new song was decent, but I’m not sure where I come down on Freedom ’90. I was hoping that maybe she would bring out George Michaels but alas no.
- Jamie Foxx comes out to show everyone how much he has had to drink while in Vegas then shuts ups just long enough for Jennifer Garner announce the Best New Award as Gym Class Fallout. Yeah, that seems just about right.
- MTV then rolls out a week old joke that really wasn’t that funny a week ago in the Miss Teen South Carolina who flubs while pretending to flubs. Nice. At least she gave the Wu-Tang Clan a shout out.
- The big surprise guest of the night is Dr. Dre (who is disturbingly showing his age). No he didn’t perform or even receive a Lifetime Achievement Award or anything interesting, no he is just relegated to handing out Video of the Year to Rihanna.
- The show ends with Nelly Furtado, Timberlake and Timbaland each performing a verse from their latest song before getting together as the song they did together start only for the track to stop so abruptly that Timbaland had to inform everyone five seconds later that that’s the end of the show. How apropos of an end.
- I’m really getting too old for this (expletive deleted).
Big News of the Week: NBC Really Want You to See Their New Shows: Last week I mentioned that NBC would be offering up three of there new shows, Chuck, Journeyman, and Life, to rent through Blockbuster. Then a couple days ago I mentioned that starting tomorrow, you could download those three shows as well as Bionic Woman through Amazon’s UnBox (if it is already Monday when you read this check the sidebar for a banner that will take you to the site). Then yesterday I was wondering through my On Demand feature on my television and saw an ad saying you can watch those four shows on the Entertainment On Demand channel as well as the High-Def on Demand channels up to two weeks before the shows even air (since the shows weren’t up yet when I checked yesterday I assume they won’t be available until tomorrow, but then again they may be there already and am just a moron when it comes to technology). Scooter Update: See below for the Amazon links to the shows:
For those of you that are too cheap to shell out the extremely low sticker price of twenty dollars for the best new show of last season, Friday Night Lights, the good people over at GiveMeMyRemote are giving away a copy of the first season for free.
Greek: Last week I forgot to complain about this week’s promo where the announcer said there was going to be a twist that no will see coming followed by an Cappie and Rebecca Logan in what looked like a compromising position. I was going to complain the whole twist was completely revealed last week only to find this week that the twist was that they didn’t hook up. Or was it that Cappie used the money to pay Casey back? Or did I miss the surprising twist altogether. Which may be plausible because if I’m not mistaken I was in a drug induced haze while watching the episode. And why was there even a new episode on Labor Day? Download the current season of Greek on iTunes.
Rescue Me: Another strange storyline with Tommy breaking out his dead cousin’s uniform to go on jobs when he was off duty. I guess it makes sense that without alcohol he goes out and does the only other thing that makes him feel anything. And it is a good thing he is still sober because the school room scene was another instant classic. Not so much a classic was the cheesy sitcom type storyline with Garrity’s little beer goggles bit with two different actresses. And I’m sure I would have laughed at the new phrase I learned, Beer Queer, had it not hit a little too close to home.
Promo of the Week: Don’t you have it when you see something on television, go to look for it on YouTube only not to be able to find it? It was watching the Browns opener, who got for the seventh straight year embarrassed… at home… to the evil empire Steelers, so that meant an onslaught of CBS promo. (On a side note, if any of you watch Kid Nation, you, my sir, are a moron.) One that caught my eye was the How I Met Your Mother season premiere with Mandy Moore talking about her involvement followed up by Neil Patrick Harris, in full Barney mode, telling the audience she would be appearing naked. And when Mandy disagree Neil told her to check her contract. I don’t know why the networks don’t instinctively put all their promos on YouTube, it is free advertising. When someone finally decides to le me run its network it will be the highest rated network ever (well at least in the cable and internet era).
Pick of the Week: Greek, Monday 9:00 ABCFamily; Rescue Me, Wednesday 10:00 FX: A rare double Pick of the Week from two shows that really couldn’t be more different, both of which end their seasons this week. Greek spent its solid first season riding somewhere in between a guilty pleasure and quality program but never really hit its stride thanks to a bad love triangle storyline. Then there is Rescue Me, after three great seasons of the best show on basic cable, it all came crashing down with its first shaky season of the series run. There were plenty of bright spots like a guest spot from Amy Sedaris, anything involving Garrity, and the Gavin family AA meeting, but there were more than enough uninteresting storylines and just off the deep end moments involving Tommy that just brought the season down as a whole. Let’s hope both show ends on a bright spot.
... and I am a statistics-addict. It probably started in my youth, on Sundays the local paper had a full page of baseball leaders, ranking the top one hundred best players ranked by batting average for the hitters and earned run average for the pitchers as well as team averages for both leagues. I would scour over that page for hours analyzing every detail and every column.
Just to show you how stats obsessed I am, while in college I took a statistics course just for fun. Then while working for the intramural department, I implemented a program where we would keep track of stats in most major sports, and by we I mean me who created an extensive Excel spreadsheet and then went through all the game sheets and enter each stat into the spreadsheet.
This has gone into my adulthood where I play way too many fantasy sports, usually multiple teams per season. You want to know how bad it is: I actually play fantasy hockey (speaking of which, anyone who want to join my league, shout me a holla). I have cut it down to just one football league this season, but I bet had my draft not been rescheduled I would have most likely done a second one this past Wednesday.
This gets me to why I am writing this post, my latest stats time waster, the stats for this blog. I have six different stat counters hidden in the code for the 9th Green. Many apologies to the people who drop by everyday and have to wait an extra second or two for the page to load while those counters get the information. Although you can always subscribe (see the top of the side-bar) and see each new post without coming here by subscribing to a feed reader, and yes I have something that keeps track of all the subscribers, who accesses the feed and click on it.
This morning I did my daily ritual of enjoying breakfast while checking out my recent stats when I noticed that I had four times the usual hits I get by this time. This was constant with all of my counters. Under further inspection I saw that sixty-five percent of the pages that people landed on were on two different pages: my review of Vanessa Hudgens’s album V (see It Takes a Girl to Understand) and the archive of the week that post was part of.
Like I said in her album review, “If Vanessa Hudgens and Ashley Tisdale both walked in on me right now I would be able to tell you which one is which.” And it took my rereading my review, which for the record I wrote way back in October of last year right in the middle of a run when I made a Chris Hansen reference every other post (including the one in question), to be reminded that both are cast members of High School Musical.
So this gets me wondering, why is an eleven month old post all the sudden so popular? Is there something I missed, did she release a new song from the album? Or was one of the songs recently used as a soundtrack to a montage on some crappy medical drama because the writers were too lazy to write any more dialogue? I sure hope she didn’t die or get kidnapped by Osama bin Ladin. This is something that may keep me up all night if I don’t figure it out. Feel free to give me any theories you may have.
Earlier this week I highlighted a video that turned out to be a big misstep by Dave Matthews (see below for link). Yeah Eh Hee is a decent jam in the context of a concert but a song by itself it just doesn’t work and the creepy video just made it worse. But there are still plenty of hidden gems in the Dave Matthews Band archives that never got any airplay that fit into my Feed Your iPod criteria.
One such song that has gotten plenty of play on my iPod in recent years is You Never Know off the Busted Stuff album. It was one of only two new songs that weren’t reworked from the previously shelved Lilywhite Sessions. As I grow older, the song takes on more significance, most notable the line, “Everyday should be a good day to die.” For some that may sound bleak, but for me it reminds me that you can go at any moment so live every day to its fullest so even if you suddenly die tomorrow, you can still look back and say, even if it was cut short, you lived a good life.
Below is a live version of the song which features a great opening from Carter Beauford, someone who is vastly overlooked when people talk about great drummer. Unfortunately Dave and the boys don’t (yet) sell their live albums on iTunes but you can pick up a live version of You Never Know on their Live at the Gorge album (see below for link).
Tonight is the official kickoff of the NFL season and that means it is also the start of fantasy football. I had my draft a day later than scheduled thanks to the Yahoo servers crashing. But I think that was a good thing because I was so out of it due to the massive amounts of (legal) drugs I was on. I was so loopy that I actually put a post-it note on my monitor reminding me not to draft Michael Vick. And despite picking eighth (out of ten) I think I came out with a decent draft. There was only one round where someone took who I was eyeing before I had the chance (I had to settle for Kitna when someone nabbed Donavan McNabb right before me). In fact I was so confident with my draft I even have Brady Quinn a pity draft with my last pick. Here is this year’s roster for Landry’s Revenge:
Usually this is where I give my Super Bowl prediction but during last years post I mentioned that football is the hardest of all the sports to predict. Oh, and do you know what else I said last year: Colts over Bears. Yeah, that worked out well for me, so let’s see if I can make it two years in a row.
AFC East: New York Jets North: Cincinnati Bangles South: Indianapolis Colts West: San Diego Chargers Wild Card: New England Patriots, Pittsburg Steelers
NFC East: Philadelphia Eagles North: Chicago Bears South: New Orleans Saints West: Seattle Seahawks Wild Card: Dallas Cowboys, Minnesota Vikings
AFC Championship: Colts over Patriots NFC Championship: Eagles over Saints Super Bowl: Colts over Eagles
There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I though I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form so here they are courtesy of YouTube. I advise you to watch them before you read my reviews if you don’t want me to spoil things. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available, if not the link goes to YouTube where you can watch the video in full screen). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.
Yesterday I mentioned you could download this video for free on iTunes but I didn’t actually watch it because I was too loopy on drugs to do so (currently I’m just down to Day and NyQuil, or as I like to call it: my Elvis regiment). Wow was this creepy, in a bad way. It is like U2’s Numb but without the unintentional comedy. The video was directed by Dave Matthews himself, who also played all the instruments too. Let’s hope he keeps the rest of his band around so he doesn’t do something like this again.
Your token Bruce Springsteen video, the song rocks but the video is pretty standard. Can’t they call Courtney Cox to make another cameo? Hopefully you picked up this song on iTunes last week when it was free, if not you can still pre-order the album.
This is a new track from Santana’s upcoming greatest hits package. The dude from Nickelback had already show up on one of Santana’s previous all-star albums (a song much better than this one) but for some reason the song was released to the radio with the dude from The Calling singing. And like most new songs added to a greatest hits album, the song doesn’t live up to the being part of the greatest hits. And if any of you out their actually know the dude from Nickelback, please tell him never to straighten his hair ever again. He’s scaring the children.
In a story I broke this weekend, starting yesterday you could rent through Blockbuster a DVD that featured the first episodes of NBC’s Chuck, Journeyman, and Life. For those without a Blockbuster card, starting September 10 (next Monday) you can download all three of those shows, as well as Bionic Woman, from Amazon Unbox for free. And for you pretentious types that have Tivo’s, you can transfer any Unbox download to your Tivo so you can watch it on your televisions. In other television news, The CW sent me more exclusive videos of Reaper except I have been too lazy to watch them. But they also mentioned that they started up an Official Reaper YouTube Channel although I’m not sure if the “exclusive” videos they send me are the same anyone can regularly get in the YouTube channel. And they even started up special toll free number (1-877-IN 4 HELL) to call for further information about the show from Lucifer himself. Or at least the dude who plays the devil on the show.
Scooter’s note: I’m a little hopped up on a combination of Sudafed, Claritin, and Day/NyQuil, but I have had this post saved for a while now, so I though I post it. Now if you excuse me I need to get back to my death bed.
Everyday after firing up my internets, before checking my e-mail, the latest sports scores or my favorite blogs, my first destination is to check out the latest episode of The 9. No, not the ABC series that was canceled The Nine but the daily video podcast hosted by Yahoo. Everyday they countdown nine (obviously) cool, sometimes corny videos, stories, and the occasional shameless plug for various Yahoo sites condensed into around five minutes and you each day you can vote for your favorite.
If you have yet seen an episode you may think to yourself why would anyone enjoy this to the point that they make it the first place they go. The answer is simple, presentation which is thanks most in part to host Maria Sansone who is quite possible the cutest thing around and her cheesy delivery is what will keep you coming back. If fact I dare you after watching one episode not to spend the next day going back through the archives.
Oh and one more thing before I head back to my death bed, last week over on iTunes they offered up the new Bruce Springsteen song for free and this week you can get the brand new Dave Matthews video Eh Hee video for free. Hooray free stuff.
Big News of the Week: You Can See the Latest NBC Shows at Blockbuster but not iTunes: Two big news items from NBC this week and I’ll start with the smaller item. Starting this Tuesday you can rent from Blockbuster stores as well as thru their online service a DVD that includes the first episodes of Chuck, Journeyman, and Life as well as a preview of Bionic Woman. If I am not mistaken, they did a similar thing last year on Netflix for Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip and we all know how that turned out. I always found this an odd marketing strategies as it may decrease initial rating which may hurt on the fence viewers who may not turn into the second episode fearing it would be canceled.
The bigger news is that NBC Universal has decided not to renew their contract that ends at the end of this year. And since the contract ends in the middle of the television schedule NBC has decided not to have any more new shows added to the iTunes library. I can’t say I’m too surprised by this because it seemed a little odd that it cost the same, $1.99, to buy three minute music videos, twenty minute sitcoms, and forty minute dramas. But I won’t be at all surprised if Apple unveils a pricing plan before then as Universal Music Group (are they related to NBC), the biggest record company, said they are pulling out also.
But the biggest surprise for me in this news was that NBC accounted for forty percent of all television downloads considering how they are supposedly the fourth network interims of rating. This just goes to show how big a sham the Neilson Ratings are. You are trying to tell me that a network is by far has the biggest segment of downloads, which are based on actual numbers would be all the way down at fourth in a glorified poll that are the Neilson Ratings. Seriously, what is the Neilson’s margin of error, 10%? Actually, that is a good question; does anyone know what the actual margin of error is for the Neilson Ratings? It is pretty shady that they don’t have that listed anywhere.
I have had the 9th Green Reader’s Poll up on my sidebar for album a month so I think I am going to take it down at the end of the month. If you have not taken it yet, please do so in the next week. It should only take a minute or so. And a big thanks to everyone who as already taken. Also this is your last chance to join my fantasy Dillon Panthers Football league. The live draft will take part on Yahoo this Tuesday at 9:00 PM EST. Drop me an e-mail (see sidebar) if you are interested in participating and I will give you the league ID and password.
Greek: I don’t know way, but the line Ashleigh said about needing more sleep because she was growing out her bangs out had me laughing all week. And even though they weren’t as cool as Crucifictorious but Darwin Lied was a pretty ingenious band name for a religious band. Which brings me to the best part of the episode, a new courtship for Casey in Dale. Now I know longer had to decide to root for Tool #1 (Even) or Tool #2 (Cappie) and can now root for a Dale-Casey hook-up. Speaking of hook-ups, what is with all the infidelity? Not really all the infidelity, but how all these characters can look past their partner’s infidelity so quickly? Download the current season of Greek on iTunes.
Rescue Me: You know the sign of a great character is when you start to smile just at the sight of them like with the captain’s daughter. Let’s hope the rest of the season (all two episodes) features more Amy Sedaris and less Gina Gershon.
Pick of the Week: MTV Music Video Awards, Sunday at 9:00 on MTV: I was actually excited when the show was announced, but two reasons why I was excited (Amy Winehouse and Lily Allen, have both dropped out and were replaced by T-Pain and Akon. What’s worse there is a rumor that the big “surprise” opening this year will be Britney Spears. Or as Kevin Federline will call the performance, Exhibit T in his full custody battle case. Expect a much smaller even this year as previous VMA’s had clocked in at five hours between pre, post, and the big show but is down to three hours with the pre-show starting at 8:00.
I had this up last week and I though I would put it in this post again to give something to play with as I’ll be taking tomorrow off. Below is a widget where you can vote for the Most Anticipated New Shows of Fall 2007. You can simply give it up or down votes or go to the UnSpun website and rank them in order or add new shows that aren’t on the list yet.
As September starts, we will be inundated with new televisions shows none of which will doubtfully be as great as the benchmark of great television, The Dukes of Hazzard, the latest induction into the Scooter Hall of Fame. In my youth when bed time was promptly 8:00 but was allowed to stay up for one show a week and this was the show that was always chosen. The show definitely stood the test of time because years later, thanks to TNN (now the unwatchable Spike channel) would rerun the show in the afternoon and would routinely become a staple around the dorm in college. And The Dukes of Hazzard Playstation game got its share of playtime during that time. I actually had a roommate who would start up the game to hear the theme song.
As the song goes, the show stared two good ol’ boys, Tom Wopat and John Schneider. Schneider of course would go on to play Clack Kent’s dad while Wopat would go on to, well, guest on Smallville. The cousins in one large family tree also had a female cousin and an Uncle Jesse who fathered none of them. Now I was way too young to understand the greatness of Daisy Duke during the first run of the show but definitely appreciated her in the nineties when the daisy dukes came back in style.
Yeah the Dukes were an entertaining crew but the most entertaining characters were the bad guys led by Boss Hogg, who pretty much owned all of Hazzard County and was always trying to get the Duke boys arrested for something. And that is where Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane came in with his trusty basset hound Flash (full disclosure: I had a stuffed animal Flash that I think is packed away in a box awaiting for me to knock up some chick to give to that offspring). And down the power chain, the dumber the police were as Deputies Enus and Cletus were even more inept than Roscoe.
Filling out the cast were Cooter (greatest nickname ever), the Dukes mechanic and Waylon Jennings who served as the narrator and sang the theme song. But the real star of the show was the General Lee, a 1969 Dodge Charger. It is a good thing I was way too young when the show was on to drive otherwise I would have had tried jumping rivers and other things that were featured on the show. But I did go threw a phase where I refused to use a car door, instead entering and exiting solely threw the window.
Now I could do a whole post on how the Theme to Dukes of Hazzard is the greatest theme song ever (seriously, I won’t hear an argument for anything else), instead I will lent you see for yourself below coutesy of YouTube:
Just for the record, just like many building do not have thirteenth floors, there was never a fifth season of The Dukes of Hazzard. Along those same lines there was never a feature film version featuring a blonde Daisy Duke.
Recently I scanned my iPod for potentials songs for this running segment and ended up with a playlist of over fifty potential songs for future Feed Your iPods (that is not to say I don’t want to hear from you, if you have a suggestion that fits the bill, write up a short paragraph and shoot me an e-mail and maybe I’ll feature it later). But there is something to say that amongst all these great songs, there is one that went into instant repeat mode.
I can’t say I was ever much of a big Fiona Apple fan in the beginning, there were a few good songs, one great song, one great speech (ah, remember when the VMA’s were interesting) but nothing really kept my interest. Like most people I ignored her second album mostly because I didn’t finish reading the album title until sometime last year. That was a shame because I missed a great song Paper Bag.
I have Zach Braff for introducing me to the song as it was included in the soundtrack to the otherwise forgettable The Last Kiss. I guess I shouldn’t have expected more from the hack who wrote Crash. But enough about pretentious movies. The song is full of quoteworthy lines thanks to Fiona not being afraid to let everyone know of her eccentricities (full discloser: I like my woman a little off kiltered), there is just something about the way she says, “I went crazy again.”
But the best lines are saved for the chorus: “Hunger hurts and I want him so much I would kill. But I know I’m a mess he don’t wanna clean up.” And you get the sense that Fiona knows of all these eccentricities when she sings, “He said ‘It’s all in your head’ and I said ‘so is everything’ but he didn’t get it.” There is also something to say about the pitch point production that hits every right note thanks to Jon Brion who has gone on to help out with Kanye West’s two most recent albums.
When looking to see if there was a video on YouTube so I could highlight the song I was surprised to see there was a proper music video produced for Paper Bag. It is disturbing that a song of this quality couldn’t get any airplay especially considering the song was released in 1999, the worst year in recorded music ever. Seriously, look it up, worst ever. The video makes the great song even better with the pseudo-musical feel to it, reminiscent of the McG videos from the mid-nineties (before he went off to make crappy movies and television shows) without the exaggerated color.
Yesterday I covered part one of my 2007 Fall Music Preview, and before I get to part two I have to remind you that somewhere in part one you can find a free iTunes download from not one, but two musical legends. And I want to look back at the summer before going into the fall real quickly. I have made it known my displease of Umbrella by Rihanna until I heard the Mandy Moore version (see You’re Part of My Entity) and I didn’t think I could like the song anymore until I heard the DJ Top Cat mash-up with UB40’s Red, Red Wine which you can download over at Mashup Town. Now we at the 9th Green in know way condone illegally download music so if you like either song be sure to use the links below to buy the songs from iTunes.
Chase This Light - Jimmy Eat World: Despite that last album being wrongfully overlooked, Pain is one of the great full out rock songs of this decade. Hopefully this album is as great as their previous ones and gets some success they received for The Middle back in 2001. Preorder Chase This Light on iTunes. If you preorder the album you will get a Ticketmaster code that will allow you to purchase Jimmy Eat World concer tickets before the general audience.
Chrome Dreams II - Neil Young: Some of you might be thinking to yourself, when was Chrome Dreams I released? Well, despite being recorded a couple decades ago, it was never released, but releasing a follow up to an unreleased album still isn’t in the top five strangest things Neil Young has ever done.
Ultimate Victory - Chamillionaire: Okay to be honest, the only reason I am spotlighting thing album is just in case there are any songs worthy of another great “Weird Al” Yankovic parody. And the album features hip-hop legend Slick Rick.
October 23
Carnival Ride - Carrie Underwood: Underwood easily put out the best post karaoke album ever with Some Hearts and unlike other former karaokers, she is smart not to change the formula too much like demanding that she write all her own songs so you can expect some more country pop.
Black Fingernails, Red Wine - Eskimo Joe: I know absolutely nothing about this band or album except their name for some reason gave me a few laughs when they played the Australia venue of Live Earth. Granted I shouldn’t laugh too hard in case they become the next INXS, but then again they could become the next Men at Work.
October 30
The Cool - Lupe Fiasco: In the lead up to his debut, Lupe had been labeled the savior of rap, and himself even said in one of his songs, come in Hip-Hop, we’ve come to resurrect you” yet never quite completely lived to the hype. Hopefully he builds on the last album and finally lives up to the hype on this one.
Long Road out of Eden - Eagles: Someone said this is their first studio in almost three decade, but didn’t they put one out not too long ago with the Hole in the World song on it? When Hell Freezes Over came out I was completely on The Eagles bandwagon, but I can’t say I really care that much anymore.
November 6
I Am Me - Alicia Keys: After Graduation, this is my most anticipated upcoming album. Yeah her first two album were just good, but there is definitely a great to classic album in Alicia Keys and this may be it and my sources tell me that John Mayer may make an appearance. I have been playing the song she debuted at Live Earth constantly since.
Saturday Nights, Sunday Mornings - Counting Crows: The Counting Crows are in the discussion of the best first two albums ever. But you can also argue that they had one of the steepest drop-off in music history. Adam Duritz stated that he has rededicated himself to his craft so maybe this will be a comeback of sorts. The album also may be a double album divided into songs about Saturday Nights and the other surprisingly being about Sunday Mornings
You can also look for a re-release of the inaugural induction into the Scooter Hall of Fame, August and Everything After on September 18. It features six bonus tracks and a bonus live disk recorded on the last date of the tour to support that album.
The Carnival II: Memoirs of an Immigrant - Wyclef Jean: It has been ten years since Clef released the first Carnival. Coincidentally, it has also been a decade since he had a hit (granted Two Wrongs should have been one) aside from when he rode Shakira’s coattails. The album will feature your usual cavalcade of token rap guest spots including Akon, Mary J. Blige, Lil’ Wayne, T.I. and, um, Paul Simon?
November 13
8 Diagrams - Wu-Tang Clan: A wise man once told me that Wu-Tang Clan ain’t nuntin’ to (expletive delegated) wit. Expect an ODB tribute song (who will appear courtesy of previously record material), guest spots from Q-Tip, some dude from System of a Down and John Frusciante who appears on a song based around George Harrison’s While My Guitar Gently Weeps.
Frank - Amy Winehouse: Many of you man not realized that Back to Black was not Winhouse’s first album, instead Frank was her debut, but hasn’t been released stateside until now. Although this album does predate her work with producer Mark Ronson who helped develop the cool retro vibe of some of the best songs on her current album.
November 20
Untitled - Mariah Carey: Some would call The Emancipation of Mimi her comeback album; personally I don’t think anything post-Honey is worth listening to. One of the main reasons she has become unlistenable, Jermaine Dupri, will be back to produce some tracks.
No dates have been confirmed yet, but you may also expect albums from The Roots (Rising Down), Gnarls Barkley, Q-Tip (The Resistance), Mary J. Blige, and Duran Duran (The Red Carpet Massacre). There are also some live albums coming from R.E.M. (their first ever), Daft Punk, and Brian Setzer Orchestra. And being the holiday season, of course there are the prerequisite greatest hits albums from Nas, Santana, The Goo Goo Dolls, Matchbox Twenty, Faith Hill, Spice Girls (seriously?), and Eric Clapton which, despite being called The Complete Clapton, does not include Layla or anything pre-1980.
Rumors abound that there will be albums from Michael Jackson and Eminem (yawn) and a music preview wouldn’t be complete with the obligatory, maybe this is the year Chinese Democracy comes out.
Like I said in part 1, if I left off your favorite upcoming album or just want to say what you are most looking forward to the fall, drop me a comment.
To get you to read this whole post, somewhere I tell how to get a free song from a major artist with an album coming out.
September starts up this weekend which means record companies are stacking their release schedule in hopes for your Christmas dollars. Well the first Tuesday is pretty bleak with nothing but a reissue of The Piper at the Gates of Dawn headlining the week, but after that it is nothing but big names until Thanksgiving. Much like every Fall Music Preview past I have to give my obligatory the three quarters of the year sucked massively with only a few bright spots, most notably from English chicks with problems (i.e. Lily Allen, Amy Winehouse). But the few bright spots were overshadowed by some monumental disappointment (i.e. Kelly Clarkson, Fall Out Boy, Maroon 5, Smashing Pumpkins, Trapped in the Closet, rap music in general).
Here is a look at some artists who hope to turn the record company’s success around, many of which will have their albums reviewed here. If you are interrested in preordering the albums from Amazon, the link on the album name will take you their, the links on artists names will take you to their iTunes page. If I left one of your favorite artists off the list with an upcoming album feel free to drop me a comment or feel free to wax poetic in the comment section on which albums you are looking forward to. (Note: release dates subject to change)
September 11
Graduation - Kanye West: As mentioned earlier, rap music in general hasn’t been very good this year, but if there is someone who can change that it will be the guy who released the two best rap albums this decade. Although I am a little worried about the T-Pain and Lil’ Wayne cameos. See the side bar to preorder Graduation on iTunes.
Curtis - 50 Cent: Nothing says I completely sold out more that a Justin Timberlake appearance. 50 said he would retire if Kanye out sold him which should be enough reason to pick up Graduation this week. Preorder Curtis on iTunes.
September 18
Drastic Fantastic - KT Tunstall: Tunstall is one o four artists that can boast they receive a Severe rating on my Terror Alert so my expectations are high for her sophomore outing. Granted after hearing the first single my expectations dropped just a little. Preorder Drastic Fantastic on iTunes.
Last of Seven - Pat Monahan: The dude from Train with a solo album? Well the dude from Matchbox Twenty had a few hit so I guess why not.
Playlist - Babyface: Remember when Babyface was the biggest R&B songwriter. I won’t a correlation that the genre has pretty much sucked since he went out of demand. Now ‘Face is trying out other’s material with a cover album including the James Taylor classic Fire and Rain.
September 25
Echo, Silence, Patience and Grace - Foo Fighters: I can’t say I have bought a Foo Fighters album since the first one, but that is not to say they don’t have plenty of songs I love. And the first single, The Pretender definitely rocks hard. Preorder Echo, Silence, Patience and Grace on iTunes.
Songs About Girls - Will.i.am: I was a big Black Eyed Peas guy back in the day. Then the Fergie era was ushered in and they have sucked ever since. So this should be interesting to see if Fergie is like good music kryptonite and take her out of the equation and Will be entertaining again or has she tainted him forever.
October 2
Magic - Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band: Remember at the top of the post you could get a free song from a major artist, well that is from none other than Bruce and company. Click on Radio Nowhere and download the first single off the album for free on iTunes. Yeah this is cool but it is a safe assumption I am going to buy the whole album anyway, but will be able to jam to the song for a month before the album comes out but you can always pre-order the album while you are picking up the single now. Get song now because it stops being free at the end of this week
As an added bonus, you can also get the new Paul McCartney single, Nod Your Head as well as the video (which is prett cheesy) for the song for free too.
Revival - John Fogerty: October 2nd is like September 11th for old white dudes with the Boss taking on the Creedence Clearwater Revival front man. Well accept it is obvious who will take the top spot this week.
Live Earth: Interesting that the track listing hasn’t been released yet so I bet there are some licensing issues which may leave some great performances off the disk (are the Rolling Stones trying to get too much money for the Gimme Shelter performance?). The only confirmed song is John Mayer’s Waiting on the World to Change. Preorder Live Earth on iTunes.
October 9
Rock and Roll Jesus - Kid Rock: My sources tell me this album, his first in four years, six since anyone cared, will be more rock than rap. The first single, So Hot is pretty forgettable. Maybe he should hook back up with Sheryl Crow and target the soccer mom again.
Heroes and Thieves - Vanessa Carlton: I’m a little torn on her comeback. On one hand I love her first album (indifferent to the second) but they she went and signed with The Inc (formerly Murder Inc) and Irv Gotti is helping produce the album.
The Black and White Album - The Hives: The group may have recorded one of the best one hit wonders of the decade but it looks like this is their attempt to wipe that title from their résumé.
Click the link to see part 2 of my 2007 Fall Music Preview. And again if I missed anything let me know or just comment on what you are looking forward to.
When we last saw Ben Harper, he dropped a pretty decent double album last album, half filled with funky grooves and the other with mellow tunes, which may have been better off as one single disk. The whole album barely went over an hour so conceivably it could have. Now Harper is back with his Innocent Criminals for a new album, Lifeline, recorded right after coming off his last tour straight to analog tape in a studio in Paris.
My guess it would be hard to be putting out album for fifteen years and only have one hit, yet it never seems to faze Harper who has never tried to recreate the funky Steal My Kisses or its limited success. The latest songs here on Lifeline sound like a mish mash of the two disks of Both Sides of the Gun into a singular not so rock, not so mellow disk. Most of the songs sound like a striped down version of seventies soul classic, very little flashes of horns, instead mostly acoustic guitars and pianos fill out the music.
On Needed You Tonight, Harper goes back and forth effortless from contained shouting to smooth vocals as if he were channeling Otis Redding. But the closest Harper comes to recreating that classic soul sound is on Heart of the Matters (not to be confused with the Don Henley song), a classic slow building song that culminates with the arrival of some backing singers to get across the great chorus and bridge at the end of the song.
Recording right off the road may have contributed to keeping the juices flowing in the Innocent Criminals because they haven’t sounded better; they even come close to reaching the climax of the great Stax house band Booker T and the MG’s. The groove created by the piano, electric and acoustic guitars for Put it on Me should have your toes tapping until the next time Ben and the boys go back into the studio.
- The big show started of with the much hyped Britney Spears performance and despite with expectations were so low she could walk over the bar, she still found a way to slither under it. Now I have never watched America’s Got Talent, but her performance is what I would imagine what a Britney impersonator’s that was let on the show just so the Hoff would have something to laugh at would look like. She didn’t bother to lip-sync half the time and was a half to full step behind her back up dancers half the time and looked lost half the time. But I guess it would be hard to remember the steps and to move your lips when you spent three minutes trying to hold in your gut. Note to Britney: fat people don’t walk around in their bra and panties. Yeah you could have pull that look off thirty pounds ago but you now either need to put some clothes on or work in a thousand sit ups a day.
- Rihanna wins the Monster Single of the Year as well as the monster cleavage of the year award.
- Kanye West and 50 Cent come out to hype their release date. I have said this before and I will say it again, for the love of hip-hop be sure to pick up Graduation this week so 50 retires for coming in second. Anyone find it interesting that no one even mentions Kenny Chesney who has a legitimate chance to outsell either of the rappers. Don’t underestimate the buying power of hillbillies. But any ways. Be sure to look out for my Kanye review tomorrow and 50 on Wednesday.
- Justin Timberlake’s music sucks massively and acts like a complete tool ninety-five percent of the time but I like his blast at MTV and their reality programming while accepting an award from The Hills (but I’d like to state for the record that I would definitely stand underneath the brunette’s umbrella-ella-ella-eh-eh-eh). But then lost points when saying that The Simpsons were part of MTV’s reality programming.
- Alicia Keys adds some class to program even if she was wearing that looked like Olivia Newton-John combined her wardrobe from the final scene from Grease and the Physical video. The new song was decent, but I’m not sure where I come down on Freedom ’90. I was hoping that maybe she would bring out George Michaels but alas no.
- 50 Cent: Nothing says I completely sold out more that a 
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