Friday, May 04, 2012

Around the Tubes - 5/4/12


I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony, United Stats of America, Swamp People, Conan, Magic City, The 13 Most Promising Pilots, Saturday Night Live, Sullivan and Son, and Jane by Design.

- When the inductees into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame were announced you could not help be excited: Guns n Roses, Beastie Boys, Red Hot Chili Peppers and more. Unfortunately by the time the ceremony came around Axl Rose released a rambling letter why who was not going to show up while MCA and Rod Stewart could not make it due to illness. But the ceremony airing tomorrow at 9:00 on HBO should still be entertaining especially the final jam of Higher Ground by Red Hot Chili Peppers (who were inducted by Chris Rock), Slash, Jeff Beck, Billy Joe Armstrong, and George Clinton.



- As a history buff and a stat geek, the new History series United Stats of America sounds right up my alley. The show, which premieres this Tuesday at 10:00, is hosted by identical twins and stand-up comedians Randy and Jason Sklar who will reveal stories behind the most interesting and surprising statistics in American history. Check out a clip below:



- For those that watch Swamp People Thursdays at 9:00 o History and have a Twitter account, you could win a 50-inch plasma TV just by using #SwampSayings during the show while tweeting your favorite line from the show. Three weekly winners will also receive Swamp People gear and cash. Head over to history.com for complete details and to enter.

- World Peace is coming Conan this Monday. No not the concept but basketball player Metta World Peace will stop by in his first sit-down interview since his NBA suspension. Joel McHale, Piers Morgan, and Tom Selleck will also be stopping by next week.

- Willa Ford will be appearing on tonight’s episode of Magic City airing at 10:00 on Starz as someone who gets up close and personal with Divin’ Dave Donahue. Check out a still from the episode below.

Willa Ford on Magic City


- TVGuide.com has a list of the 13 Most Promising Pilots of the fall season which include Tami Taylor, her daughter Julie, a man in tights, a female Dr. Watson, and the annoying dude from Glee ripping off Modern Family.

- Get ready for some Moves Like Jagger jokes for the season finale of Saturday Night Live on May 19 will feature Mick Jagger as host and musical guest. Hopefully a successful hosting gig will lead to a Let’s Rob Mick Jagger reboot.

- Last week new TBS comedy Men at Work went into production and this week the network’s other upcoming sitcom Sullivan and Son started filming. Look out for the show when it premieres Thursday, July 19, at 10:00.

- Not only will Teri Hatcher guest on the upcoming season of Jane by Design as Jane’s long lost mother, she will be making her directorial debut for the episode. Look out for it when the show returns Monday June 5 at 9:00 on ABC Family.

Thursday, May 03, 2012

You Better Get to Getting on Your Goodbye Shoes


Blown Away - Carrie Underwood

With American Idol and The Voice (and its laughably bad finalists) wind down another season, the start of Duets later this month and all the other singing competitions that have come and gone the past decade, it is easy to remember with all these shows, there have only been two successful winners from any of these show, Kelly Clarkson, who has been making the reality rounds this year on two different show, and Carrie Underwood. Sure Underwood would probably never win a singing competition on the radio, but she has a quality that just draws you in even when you know you should not like her music.

Like most Carrie Underwood albums, after the first listen to Blown Away it is striking as to how boring and bland it is, even more so than her previous albums. Yet by the second listen it has already become mostly catchy. And much like her previous albums, the new one straddles the line between country and adult contemporary which is moving more and more to the latter with every passing album. Just how pop-rock is the new album? There is a song, See You Again that blatantly steals the “ohh ohh ohh” part from Laura Branigan’s eighties classic Self Control. But It is hard not to be disappointed in the one song on the album written by Hair-Metal master “Mutt” Lang Who Are You which attempts to being an uplifting power ballad but fails massively.

Strangely for someone who is not much of a pure country fan, some of the most entertaining tracks are the few most traditionally country sounding ones. One Way Ticket is a fun sitting on your porch with friends and sing along kind of song (which is ironic considering the song is about getting off your butt). While Cupid’s Got a Shotgun is so absurd it starts becoming entertaining. But the best song on the album is the title track where Carrie goes big and succeeds. She really needs to ditch the overtly sappy songs and record more like Blown Away in the future.

And what Carrie Underwood album would be complete without an absurdly sappy song for country radio, so be sure to be prepared to hear Thank God for Hometowns in heavy rotation in the near future for those that still listen to the radio. Wine After Whiskey is no slouch in the so over the top cheesy you have to roll your eyes department.

Song to Download – Blown Away

Blown Away gets a Terror Alert Level: Elevated [YELLOW] on my Terror Alert Scale.


Wednesday, May 02, 2012

You Tried to Replace Me but You Didn’t Get Far

Little Broken Hearts - Norah Jones

Nothing perks up my ears these days than “produced by Danger Mouse.” In a decade behind the boards he has moved into rarified air of must hear producers like Rick Rubin. And much like Rubin who go seamlessly between rap, metal and folk, Danger Mouse (government: Brian Burton) has worked from people as wide ranging as cartoon Gorillaz, blues rockers The Black Keys, and his groups with Cee-Lo Green and James Mercer. Then on his spaghetti western soundtrack to a movie that was never made that he made with Daniele Luppi Burton made his most unlike collaboration yet: Norah Jones.

Yes Norah Jones, the jazzy-pop artist that every soccer mom in America played over and over again in their minivans a decade ago when she released Don’t Know Why. But in the ten years since, Norah has gotten more and more adventurous with the tracks she applies her silky vocals to culminating in her previous best album The Fall released back in 2009. Then Danger Mouse recruited her to appear on his Rome which ended up being the three standout tracks on the album. The soccer moms who still have not removed Come Away with Me from their minvans may scratch their heads at the pairing, wondering why Norah Jones is working with the weird dude who was in a group with the even weirder Cee-Lo, but to those of us that continued to follow her career, the pairing is a perfect (or dare I say Perrrfect) match.

With Danger Mouse behind the board, the new Norah Jones album Little Broken Hearts sounds like a continuation of their work together on Rome as they both have a darker, more menacing feel than previous works by Jones. She even kills the title character in Miriam, but does it so smoothly you may not even realize it unless you read the lyrics sheet. Take It Back sound very similar to the Rome song Black when it hits its crescendo at the end with the same style of piano notes. And if I didn’t know better I would have guessed Burton brought in his buddy Dan Auerbach from The Black Keys to play guitar on the trippy blues song All a Dream.

If the title album Little Broken Hearts did not tip you off (or other song titles like Say Goodbye, She’s 22, After the Fall, 4 Broken Hearts, or Travelin’ On) this is her break up album. Thankfully there are no angry kiss off songs like Since U Been Gone as it sounds by the time Jones got around to writing the album she had since moved on to the fifth stage of grief (Reconstruction and working through) and most of the album is her getting all the way up to the seventh and final stage (Acceptance and hope).

As moody and mellow as the album is, it is a bit jarring when she picks up the tempo for Out on the Road nine songs into the album. But that does set things up for the stand out track, the bouncy and snarky Happy Pills (which it what Norah claims she felt as she just took after the break up because she feels so good). The “Out I’m gonna get you, out I’m gonna get you outta of my head, get out” chorus may be the catchiest kiss off since I'm Gonna Wash That Man Right Outa My Hair. As Brian Burton ranks up new bands, hopefully Little Broken Hearts is the first of many collaborations with Norah Jones.

Song to Download – Happy Pills

Broken Little Hearts gets a Terror Alert Level: High [ORANGE] on my Terror Alert Scale.

Tuesday, May 01, 2012

Did You Know That Life Has Given Love a Guarantee


Songs in the Key of Life - Stevie Wonder

Stevie Wonder started out the seventies releasing the great classic Motown style music the teenager was known for up to that point when he released another ultra catchy love song Signed, Sealed, Delivered I’m Your. But as the musical prodigy transitioned into his twenties, his music got a little darker, longer, and much more political with songs like Superstition and Living for the City that still remained as catchy as his earlier work. All this collimated with his last album of the decade and best of his career Songs in the Key of Life, this month’s induction into the Scooter Hall of Fame.

As the title suggests, the album is not simply just about love or politics, it is about life and everything that comes with it. And the complications of life can explain why it took two albums, a bonus EP, twenty-one songs, and an hour and forty-five minutes to get through. There is joy, pain, entertainment, and struggle, from the ghetto to the penthouse, from the cradle to every twenty-six years Stevie had lived upon the release of Songs in the Key of Life on the album. Does it get heavy handed at time as most double albums do? Yes (especially the eight and a half minute Black Man that went on too long before the classroom segment at the end) but it is still hard to say there are any throwaway tracks on the albums.

Like most people my age, who were yet to even been conceived when the album was released, it took me a while to discover the album as I consider Stevie Wonder a singles artists for most of my life. I will not even confirm nor deny that the first time I heard Pastime Paradise my first thought was who is this stealing from Coolio? But I will admit Coolio did help me realize that the ultra poppy Stevie Wonder from the sixties was just one part of an even grander career than I realize at that point in my early life. The haunting original Pastime Paradise was a death march that put other songs in the Wonder songbook that I already knew into a new perspective like Living in the City.

My favorite song on the album, and maybe number two in his catalogue behind Superstition, is the simplistically titled As. The title is a stark contrast of the grandiose love song with its sweeping chorus and beautiful verses. And where a couple songs go on for too long on the album (did we really need to hear Aisha Wonder take a bath), the seven minutes of As go too fast and could have went on for twice as long and I would not have minded. You may have to actually live life to fully appreciate Songs in the Key of Life (or at the very least hit a quarter-century like Stevie did as he was recording it), but once you have, the album should become a cornerstone of your record collection.


Monday, April 30, 2012

The Voice Semifinalists Power Rankings


Last week I complained about the Instant Eliminations, but now that everything has played out I have done a complete 180 because it is clear America cannot be trusted. Sure I can quibble with a couple of the coach’s decisions during the Live Shows, the only egregious decision they made so far was Christina Aguilera unceremoniously giving Jesse Campbell the boot. Yet has got it wrong time after time saving Pip and James Massone (which the coaches had to right with their Instant Eliminations) and did not save Charlotte Sometimes in the last round while head scratchingly saving the fifth rate opera singer and rock music ruiner Chris Mann and embarrassing to watch Tony Lucca while the more talented Ashley De La Rosa and Mathai are sent home. So the coaches made just one completely stupid decision while America made five.

After the Sweet 16 was decided this year I thought it was significantly better than last season. But at the end of the results show Tuesday I thought to myself, “Even though the quarterfinalist were much better than the first season, the semifinalist somehow managed to be worse and the semifinalist last year were not that strong. Thanks soccer moms with too much time on your hands.” To see if my premise was right or not, instead of doing a power ranking of just contestants from this season, I thought I would expand it to the semifinalist from both season to see which season was actually strongest (this season’s contestants are in bold).


Dia Frampton from The Voice1. Dia Frampton

2. Lindsey Pavao

3. Xenia

4. Nakia

5. Jamar Rogers

6. Javier Colon

7. Jermaine Paul

8. Juliet Simms

9. Vicci Martinez

Lindsey Pavao from The Voice10. Katrina Parker

11. Beverly McClellan

12. Erin Willett

13. Tony Lucca

14. Casey Weston

15. Frenchie Davis

16. Chris Mann


If you would add those up giving 16 points to the best and 1 to the worst, Season One would have a 73-63 edge over season. And all you would have done to have significantly better semifinalist this season would be to have simply swapped Ashley and Mathai (who would have been in the top five above) for Chris and Tony. But if voting patterns hold up tomorrow like they did last round, the finals of Jamar, Jermaine, Tony and Chris would be extremely worse than last year that featured Dia, Javier, Vicki and Beverly. Hopefully Christina, who has been shown more than willing to play the game this seasons and clearly does not like Chris at all, will tilt the favor towards Lindsey if the coach’s allot points again this season to their singers because the final would be much more boring without her. And let’s face it, what possible song in her catalogue could she sing with Chris Mann? I bet Christina has already practicing a Hurt duet with Lindsey.

If you are like me a prefer last season to this, you are in luck because all four finalist from the first season are confirmed to perform on the Results Show tomorrow. Vicci will perform with former coach Cee Lo Green. Dia will be performing with Kid Cudi. Beverly will duet with Cyndi Lauper. And winner Javier gets to go stag.



I’ll probably update this space sometime after the show with who I am voting for and you can use the links above to vote for each of the contestants on iTunes or head over to nbc.com/thevoice. Unless you are a Chris Mann supporter, if that is the case please refrain from voting or go back to ruining American Idol by voting for mediocre singers.

Scooter Update: Two spots are beyond obvious: Lindsey and Jermaine. I would give the slight edge to Jamar and Katrina. That is what should happen, but I predict what will happen is Tony and Jermaine are solid locks. Even if America continues to have poor taste and vote for the fifth rate opera singer, Christina will wisely push Lindsey through to the finals. And Cee-Lo is a big toss up and if forced to predict, Jamar squeaks through by one percent.

Sunday, April 29, 2012

57 Channels and Only This Is On - 4/29/12



Once Upon a Time: Being from “writers of Lost,” very early in the episode it became blatantly obvious to me that the mysterious writer was Rumplestiltkin’s son (I cannot believe I did not think of this before even though during the Beauty and the Beast episode I wondered whatever happened to his son) and though it was blatantly obvious I assumed that it was Lost writers at the helm we would have to wait two seasons for the reveal. But low and behold they actually gave it to us by the end of the episode. Except it turned out not to be his son.

Which begs the question which storybook character is the mysterious writer. Oh wait, the promo monkeys pretty much spoiled that, oh never mind. And for a spell the Blue Fairy said cannot be replicated, there seemed to be a couple of storybook characters that made it to the real world without the curse like Emma and her magic wardrobe and mysterious writer (and possibly whoever the writer was talking to about speeding up the plan; actually I would not be surprised if we get an entire season of flashbacks of storybook characters in the real world if the show lasts that long).
You can stream current episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Mad Men: Kind of a cheap Lost-type storytelling for the episode. But all is forgiven with the Roger Sterling on LSD scene (but not for Peggy’s extracurricular activities in the movie theater).
You can download Mad Men on iTunes.


The Voice: I defended Tony Lucca two weeks ago against Christina Aguilera’s harsh comments and what does Tony do in his very next performance: give a very one dimensional performance. When The Voice started, the producers and coaches were all altruistic talking about not having any joke performances, but Tony’s performance was such a joke it rivals that of Erin Martin. It was such big of a joke; his backing band might as well have been William Hung and his Hung Jury. But I guess it could have been worse, when I realized they had not announced what song he was singing, I thought, “Oh my God, he’s actually going to sing Genie in a Bottle.”

But after every elimination and Save last week seeming to be controversial (though Jordis Unga seemed the right choice for Blake to send home), a pretty uneventful time for eliminations this week with James Massone and Pip rightfully getting the Instant Eliminations (though the teen girl voting bloc may disagree). I could quibble that Mathai was more entertaining than Katrina Parker, but it is hard to argue against her and Juliet Simms got through (though I could argue that much like Chris Mann last week, the two girls were much more deserving of the public’s vote but unlike Chris it was pretty obvious Tony was getting through). Really the most shocking event that happened this week was that Pip performed sans bowtie before James ditched his headband. Certainly did not see that coming.



You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can download songs from this episode using the widget at right.

Survivor: One World: I always love the pecking order challenges because it shows everyone where they stand in the tribe. Unfortunately only a few people on the bottom of the totem pole have taken advantage of the situation and it looks like it will not happen again this season unless Kat can hatch a master plan instead of just complaining about it. And Kat managed to be the dumbest person this week. Seriously, how does Alicia, a Special Education teacher not know how IQ work?
You can stream recent episodes over at cbs.com.

Survivor on iTunes


Revenge: As someone who is meticulous and calculating as Emily is, how could she think her father’s murder was just a random jailhouse fight? Of course the Grayson’s were behind the killing. It should have at least clicked when she saw how Vicki could get to her son on the inside.
You can stream current episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: The show needs more Roasts in the future.
You can stream recent episodes over at cbs.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Community: Sometimes the show tries so hard in being spot on with their parodies and being clever they forget to actually be funny. This week was one of those times.
You can stream current episodes on Hulu. You can also download Community on iTunes.

Awake: Of course Pierre Chang had a broken arm. But anyway. I wondered the deeper they got into the move what could the possible reason they would have to end up staying (you knew they were never going to go to Oregon) and having a grandkid is a very worthy excuse.
You can stream current episodes on Hulu. You can also download Awake on iTunes.

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Best of the Week - 4/28/12



Quote of the Week: Is January Jones a robot? (Chloe, Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23)

Song of the Week: I Just Wasn't Made For These Times – The Beach Boys (Mad Men)

Scene of the Week:



Big News of the Week: NFL Draft: For us Browns fan, the NFL Draft is our Super Bowl because we really do not have much else to look forward to and after this draft, it may still be the case that we do not have much to look forward next season. I did not really like moving up one spot to get Trent Richardson. I did not think he was worth the extra picks because I think the Vikings were just throwing up a smoke screen to get extra picks. And even if they did, the Browns have so many holes, Matt Kalil or Justin Blackman would have been worth picks at number four.

But even worse with all those hole was taking a quarterback with third round talent in the first round when the reason the current QB looked so bad was because his starting RB for most of the season was on someone else’s practice squad, their best WR was a 3 at best for any other team and the group led the league in drops, the TE had concussion problems, and half of the offensive line was essentially a revolving door. Brandon Weeden may be more talented than Colt McCoy; he will not have much more success with just an upgrade at RB and no round one talent to throw to or block for him. Ugg, what a horrible start to 2012. Wake me up in time for the 2013 draft when we have to take Matt Barkley with the number one overall pick..

Preview Picture of the Week:

The Client List


Free Download of the Week: Lost Without You – Rhett Miller (Rolling Stone)

New Album Release of the Week: Little Broken Hearts - Norah Jones

New DVD Release of the Week: Clueless [Blu-ray]

Video of the Week: The new ABC Family sitcom Baby Daddy launches Wednesday, June 20 at 8:30 and they have just released its first promo. Check it out below:

Baby Daddy Promo


Next Week Pick of the Week: Suburgatory, Wednesday at 8:30 on ABC: Forget all the pretentious people who try to tell you Parks and Recreation is the funniest show on network television (aren’t these the same people that told you it was an unfunny version of The Office when it came on; why did they bother to continue watching), Suburgatory has the most laughs per minute you can find on free television. Bonus points for having Alicia Silverstone for the reminder of the season as Geoge’s girlfriend and Noah’s baby mama (can you still be a baby mama through surrogacy). Also Dalia Royce remains the most frightening thing on television, dead, alive, or undead.

Friday, April 27, 2012

Around the Tubes - 4/17/12


I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on Veep, James Cameron: Voyage to the Bottom of the Earth, The Lying Game, Major Crimes, Men at Work, Murfie, Conan, Being Mary Jane, Genesis Awards, and Dave Matthews.

- For those that watched the series premiere of Veep and were left wanting more, here is a deleted scene from the episode. And be sure to check out the latest episode this Sunday at 10:00 on HBO.



- Did you not get enough James Cameron with the recent 100th anniversary of the Titanic? Well you are in luck because this Sunday Nation Geographic Channel will air James Cameron: Voyage to the Bottom of the Earth premiering airing at 9:00. The special will chronicle his historic one-man dive last month to the Mariana Trench’s Challenger Deep, the Ocean’s deepest point.

- Fans of The Lying Game will be happy to learn that you will get to see where Sutton and her mom are going to go with their master plan that was revealed in the finale because ABC Family announced that they have greenlit a second season that will start filming this summer and will hit your television screens this winter.

- Also going into production is the first season of Major Crimes which started filming this week. Look for The Closer spin-off in August.

- One more show going into production this week was Men at Work, the new TBS sitcom and Stacy Keibler, J.K. Simmons, and Kathy Najimy have all signed up as guest stars. The show premieres May 24.

- Want “Music 4 Life”? Murfie.com is doing just that (or one free album perv week for the rest of your life). Just “Like” Murfie on Facebook and sign up for a free account to enter. If you share the sweepstakes on Facebook you can get three more entries.

- Heads up Chicago, Conan O’Brien will be in town for the TBS Just for Laughs Chicago Comedy Festival June 11-14 where he will be filming Conan. Head over to teamcoco.com to enter an online lottery for seats to one of the four shows.

- Remember a couple weeks ago when I told you about Gabrielle Union being cast in an upcoming BET show Being Mary Jane and you thought to yourself, “yeah she’s attractive but why should I watch?” Well here is a reason to watch: John Fracking Shaft. Yes Richard Roundtree has joined the cast along with Omari Hardwick (For Colored Girls,The A-Team), Tika Sumpter(Gossip Girl, One Life To Live, The Game), BJ Britt (Vampire Diaries), Lisa Vidal (Star Trek).

- The Oscars for Animals is coming to Animal Planet May 5 at 4:00 when their air The Humane Society of the United States 26th Genesis Awards. If you miss it there will be an encore presentation May 6 at 8:00 and will be hosted by Carrie Ann Inaba and Uggie from The Artist.

- And just because, Dave Matthews premiering a new song Mercy on The Late Show:


Thursday, April 26, 2012

Who’s Jealous of Who?


Blunderbuss - Jack White

In the past decade, Jack White has played in three very distinctively different bands. First there was the blues based garage band The White Stripes with a very strict rule of only recording songs the two could play live (meaning rarely more than two instruments per song) and were so strict they even kept their clothing limited to red, black, and white. Then came The Raconteurs a power-pop rock band. The last band he formed was the creepy alternative rock group The Dead Weather with Jack on drums. Then last year White announced he was not going to form any more bands, oh yeah, and he announced his first big band The White Stripes was essentially dead.

So what is next for the guy who recorded ten albums with three bands over the span of twelve years who does not want to start anymore bands? A solo album naturally. And with three distinctly sounding bands what exactly does a Jack White solo album sound like? Well it sound a lot like what The White Stripes may have sounded like had they not put restrictions on their recording and brought more musicians and singers into the studio with them.

Blunderbuss is right out of the blues rock playbook but right away in the opening track Missing Pieces you hear organs that would have never fit into a White Stripes album. Those missing his breakout band will want to go straight to Sixteen Saltines, a riff heavy song reminiscent of some of the former band’s most famous.

But further into the album, the less and less it starts sounding like a White Stripes album and other Jack White influences. He goes down to the delta and recruits a sultry R&B singer to duet with on Love Interruption. And all the time he has spent in Nashville shows through with a few fiddles and mandolins while the Little Willie Brown cover I’m Shakin’ sounds like it could have been recorded in Sun Studios. here is a heavy classical piano into on Hypocritical Kiss which is a bit jarring coming from the guy. There is actually a lot of piano in the second half of the album. Then the album ends with White’s weirdest musical trip yet Take Me With You When You Go, which starts out as swinging sixties song that kicks into a frantic high gear in the second half.

Even though it is more diverse, Blunderbuss is similar to a White Stripes album in that although the songs are really good, they start to wear on you if you listen to the album straight through and Blunderbuss is much better heard on shuffle in the middle of the rest of your music library.

Song to Download – Sixteen Saltines

Blunderbuss gets a Terror Alert Level: Elevated [YELLOW] on my Terror Alert Scale.


Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Previewing Locked Up Abroad 6.x


Erik Aude of Locked Up Abroad

If there is one thing I have learned from watching Locked Up Abroad, do not, under any circumstance, accept an all expense paid trip to another country because you are being used as a drug mule. For the new season of Locked Up Abroad we learn three new rules for those dumb enough to voluntarily become drug mules: rule number one is never body pack. The second rule is never body pack. Do I even need to tell you what the third rule is? Guess what the guy in the next week’s episode does. If you said body pack his drugs, give yourself a pat on the back.

But for tonight’s season premiere, it is yet another one of the people who thought they were getting a nice vacation for free. Erik Aude was a struggling actor (he was credited as Musclehead in Dude, Where's My Car?) working as a personal trainer when a buddy at his gym had a way of making extra money importing leather that would save the sender some sort of tax had he shipped it regularly. And wouldn’t you know it; the suitcase with the leather samples was lined with opium. Oops.

Sure Locked Up Abroad has done the unwilling drug mule before, and by estimate accounts it makes up fifty percent of the episodes, but this episode is notable for two reason. This is the first time that I am aware of where the subject actually plays himself in the dramatization parts, keep in mind this guy brags to a customs agents that he was also in 7th Heaven and Bounce, which if I am not mistake was a horrible Ben Affleck movie. It is also worth watching because it is the funniest episode ever in the history of Locked Up Abroad because the guy clearly exaggerates his story. Yeah the guy if buff and played a guy named Musclehead once, but I have a hard time believing he went all Jason Statham and single handily took down an entire prison of Pakistanis. But it is entertaining to watch. And why wait until tonight, watch that scene below and tell me if you think it happened the way Erik says it did or he did it just to boost his demo reel.

Locked Up Abroad: From Hollywood to Hell


Also this season on Locked Up Abroad there is the previously mentioned body packer (another reason not to do drugs, the more common way of smuggling drugs involves passing balloons full of it through your digestive system, so think of where that comes out of the next time you contact your dealer) who somehow has a bunch of near misses before finally gets busted. We will also meet a smuggler who gets busted in Argentina who swims across to Brazil to escape.

Locked Up Abroad airs Wednesdays at 10:00 on National Geographic Channel. You can also download Locked Up Abroad on iTunes.



Tuesday, April 24, 2012

It Started with a Whisper and That Was When I Kissed Her


Picture Show - Neon Trees

It is a shame that Neon Trees did not form fifteen years ago because they are making the catchiest pop-rock music since bands like Smash Mouth ruled the radio and MTV with McG directed videos. Their ultra catchy Animal found its way onto pop radio and had anyone who heard it singing along but the time the second chorus came around but they were a band that no one really talked about because the acts that surrounded them were bigger than life personas than actual musicians.

The band is back with their sophomore album Picture Show with a just as catchy lead single Everybody Talks which may not be as easy to sing along with as Animal was but it should get your head bobbing whenever it comes on the radio. If Moving in the Dark is not slated to be the second single, it should. The song sounds like a Brit Pop band trying to create an anthem out of the early Bruce Springsteen catalogue and as weird as it sound, somehow succeeds. Mad Love shows that the band can even pull off a sweet synch-pop song.

Unfortunately much like albums by those pop-rock bands of the late nineties, once you get past those three or so obvious singles the rest of the album becomes less and less memorable or sticks out for the wrong reasons. The bridge of Hooray for Hollywood just consists of the lead singing listing a bunch of famous people that died because of their drug use and ends with him weirdly saying, “Amy, Whitney” back and forth way too many time. But when they hit stride, you will not find anything catchier. Maybe they can even inspire a Fastball comeback.

Song to Download – Moving In the Dark

Picture Show gets a Terror Alert Level: Elevated [YELLOW] on my Terror Alert Scale.


Monday, April 23, 2012

I Want My Music Television - 4/23/12


There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.

Share My Love – R. Kelly



I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is R. Kelly has a new video out. The bad news is that is not a new chapter of Trapped in the Closet. C’mon Kells, if you what to share your love, there is no greater love than new chapters of Trapped in the Closet. I guess I do like this song though, but it is still no Trapped in the Closet.


The Rifle's Spiral - The Shins



http://youtu.be/jyqWjl7GkCE
I do not know if Tim Burton directed the latest video from The Shins but I get a serious Corpse Bride vibe from it.


Warrior – Mark Foster, Kimbra and A-Trak



Every year Converse convenes three random musicians and has them record a song for them and somehow these songs manage to always sound awesome. This year’s track features Mark Foster (the dude from Foster the People), Kimbra (the chick from the Goyte song) and A-Trak (that random DJ you’ve never hear of). Best part of this musical series is thay you can download the song for free without even having to buy any shoes, head over to journeys.com to do just that.


Easy Way Out - Gotye



Speaking of Gotye, since no one has tired of Somebody That I Used to Know quite yet, his latest video has gone virtually unnoticed. The new song may not be as catchy, but the music video did manage to be freakier.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

57 Channels and Only This Is On - 4/22/12


Mad Men: How disappointing that Trudy Campbell did not do the Zoo Be Zoo dance at her dinner party. On the bright side, I finally got to see someone beat the crap out of her husband which I have waited to happen since the first season.
You can download Mad Men on iTunes.

The Voice: If I were Mark Burnett, my mantra for The Voice would be “Don’t be American Idol.” Idol is a painfully bad amateur karaoke contest and The Voice has pretty much done everything right in two season (sure I can knick pick some of the coach’s decision *cough*Erin Martin*cough*) even the phrasing they use is better than Idol. Contestants are eliminated on Idol. Singers on The Voice “win” battles. Then in the Live Shows there are America’s “Saves” and Coach “Saves”, very positive words. But The Voice had an epic fail this week by introducing Instant Elimination. “Elimination”: a very negative word. If anything should be eliminated it is the Instant Eliminations next season.

Sure Blake Shelton went the easy and obvious root by chopping off Jordis who did not receive America’s vote last round and gave another mediocre performance. Christina Aguilera had a much tougher decision because he save last time, Ashley De La Rosa gave the strongest performance of the night. With that said, I still thought going into the elimination that Jesse Campbell was the most safe, Ashley still would have been a safe pick to go, Lindsey Pavao has been the front runner on the team but gave a very bland performance, and I thought Chris Mann was most likely to go after a painful performance and a string of boring performance. But Christina booting Jesse is the most shocking moment in two seasons of The Voice. Christina just cannot win, prior to the elimination she had the moment of the night when she and a couple male strippers serenaded Blake with Hillbilly Bone and no one is talking about that because of the elimination.

Almost as disappointing as Jesse’s elimination was Lindsey’s performance. I was ready to pronounce her the winner after her amazing performance of Say Aah and her performances of Heart Shape Box and Somebody That I Used to Know were weirdly awesome, but Part of Me just did not work. What’s worse is when she announced she was going to perform Rihanna I thought to myself, “wow, this should be interesting, I can’t wait to hear what she does with this medley (assuming her medley was not an actually medley like Moses Stones) but when she changed it to Katy Perry, my first thought was, “Ugg.” (I pretty much had the same reaction when Naia Kete went from doing a reggae version of Turning Tables to a straight version of the song; seriously, someone needs to take away his Adele album before we are stuck hearing Jermaine Paul’s version of Rumour Has It).

As shocking as it was, Jesse being shown the door was not even the most surprising moment of the week as I was much more shocked when Carson announced Chris Mann was saved by America, looking at Christina’s feigned clapping and Adam’s blank face after the reveal, I was not the only one that did not see this coming. If Christina thinks Tony Lucca is one-dimensional, what does she think of Chris? Is there such a thing as a fourth of a dimension? The guy is a bore and his version of Viva la Vida was painfully bad and was the only time this season I considered muting the television that did not involve Erin Martin. What is worse is that he was the least selling contestant from his team on iTunes. There is a significant flaw in the voting system of The Voice when the worst selling artist can get voted through especially when it is at the expense of the person who sold the most (who was Ashley this week). I suggested this last season and I am going to again, they should give equal weight to each voting method: 33% for online voting, 33% for phone calls, and 33% for iTunes sale. That way the people who use their hard earned money to support their favorite contestants are not drowned out by the fanatics that create hundreds fake accounts to stuff the ballot for less deserving contestants like Chris.



You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can download music from this week in the widget at right.

How I Met Your Mother: Nothing depressed me this week more than realizing I am Ted when it comes to living without a roommate.
You can stream recent episodes over at cbs.com. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

2 Broke Girls: Someone should have told Max that yes the government takes taxes right out of her paycheck, but if she filed her tax returns she makes so little she would probably get almost all of that back.

Castle: If there is not a Slaughter spin-off on ABC’s schedule next season I am going to be severely disappointed. At the very least he better show up in at least five episodes next season (and one more this season). I worried a little that we did not see him again because when Beckett took over the case I thought they were going to have it that Slaughter set the whole thing up and murdered Glitch.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.

Survivor: One World: Ever since the introduction of the auction into the game I have wondered why no one goes, I would rather pocket the $500 dollar because I am certainly not spending that kind of money on a bowl of peanut butter and Tarzan finally put his money to practical use. Until he changed his mind. As befuddling is when people who clearly on the bottom of their alliances are content to get max sixth (unless you can win immunity that round) place instead of a guaranteed fifth place and a possibility of a win. But on the bright side, we are almost guaranteed to have more Kat, who cannot grasp the concept of an auction at $20 increments or what the “B” in BLT stands for, in our lives, at least to the final four, and that is fine by me.
You can stream recent episodes over at cbs.com.

Survivor on iTunes


Suburgatory: Oh Alicia Silverstone, where have you been these last lonely fifteen years. Can we just go ahead and add her to the cast already?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Suburgatory on iTunes.

Revenge: It is about time Vicky’s former life caught up to her, unfortunately Emily did not stick around to see it. And just what was Emily doing making a spare key from the thug that sent a “message” to Daniel in pison?
You can stream current episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Community: After this episode, I am beginning to understand Chevy Chase’s voice mail rants. But then again, who can complain too much when there are double Annie Edision’s involved.
You can stream current episodes on Hulu. You can also download Community on iTunes.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Best of the Week - 4/21/12


Quote of the Week: You’re a grimy little pimp. (Lane, Mad Men)

Song of the Week: Hello – Lionel Richie (Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23)

Scene of the Week:



Big News of the Week: A Melancholy Happy Trails to Dick Clark: American Bandstand was a bit before my time but like anyone born in the past fifty years, New Years Eve was not New Years Eve without Dick Clarke counting down the ball. Even after his stroke I still had to check in with him because there was no one better to ring in the New Year with. This year would have been Dick’s fortieth anniversary of Rocking Eve special and it will not be the same without him.

Preview Picture of the Week:

Susan Sarandon on The Big C Tomorrow  


Free Download of the Week: Live to Rise – Soundgarden (iTunes): The grunge gods have recorded their first new song in over fifteen years and you can get it for the low, low price of free.

Deal of the Week: R&B Classics for $3.99: Amazon MP3 has some R&B classics for only $3.99 including The Temptations, Marvin Gaye, Al Green and Lionel Richie.




New Album Release of the Week: Blunderbuss - Jack White

New DVD Release of the Week: The Innkeepers

Video of the Week: A documentary on the history of rap directed by Ice-T? Yes please. Hopefully this is just part one of a hundred. Actually, was is this not a series on VH1 Classic like the recent great Metal Evolution?


Something From Nothing: The Art of Rap Official Trailer


Next Week Pick of the Week: NFL Draft, Thursday at 8:00, Friday at 7:00, and Saturday at Noon on ESPN: For fans of preferential bottom feeders like myself, the NFL Draft is our Super Bowl, three days where hope springs eternal where hopefully our horrible players are replaced by better ones. And with the Browns having thirteen picks and three in the top thirty-seven and with plenty of holes needing to be filled, there will plenty for me to pay attention to this year.