I Want My Music Television vol. LXXII

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.


On to the Next One – Jay-Z featuring Swiss Beatz



Pretty wise of Jay-Z to debut a video called On to the Next One as the first of the decade. But dude sure likes his black and white videos just like his last one. No comment on all the weird vinaigrettes aside from following up the Obama line with a picture of a crucifix and bullets.


Skeletons – The Yeah Yeah Yeahs



On to the next artsy video, this time courtesy of The Yeah Yeah Yeahs. But the video does fit the song very well.


Dreamer – K’naan



K’naan landed three songs on my Best Songs of 2009 list and it looks like he may land another one for the 2010 list and maybe be crack the Best Videos list with this one.


I’ll Never Let You Go – Flavor Flav



So this Flavor Flav video happened. If Jay-Z wasn’t able to kill auto-tune, this song may inadvertently do the trick.

Breaking Down the Best Songs of the Year

At the end of every year since 1996, I have gathered up my favorite songs from that year for a countdown of my favorite. I was interested in seeing who were the artist that appeared most on those list over the past decade and here are the top 25 (well since there was a tie there are actually 31). I counted any song of which they were listed as a featured artist, not just when they were the lead artist. Also keep in mind this list has nothing to do with my upcoming Greatest Songs of the 00’s which I promise to release before the next decade ends. I also included a list of the number 1’s of the past twelve years as well as Mr. Irrelevant (the song that was last that year).  For the full list for the past five years, click the Best Songs label at the bottom of the post.

1. Kanye West - 25

2. Alicia Keys – 15

John Mayer – 15 (Solo, 14 and John Mayer Trio, 1)

4. U2 - 14

5. Jay-Z - 13

6. Carrie Underwood – 11

Coldplay – 11

8. Nelly Furtado – 10

9. Beyoncé – 9 (Solo, 6 and Destiny’s Child, 3)

Dave Matthews – 9 (solo, 1 and Dave Matthews Band, 8)

Eminem – 9

The Killers – 9

Michelle Branch – 9 (solo, 6 and The Wreckers, 3)

Nas – 9

Ryan Adams – 9

Snoop Dogg – 9

Snow Patrol – 9

3 Doors Down - 9

19. Christina Aguilera – 8

Jack Johnson – 8

Jack White - 8 (The Raconteurs, 2 and The White Stripes, 6)

Lily Allen – 8

Maroon 5 – 8

Santana - 8

25. Common – 7

Death Cab for Cutie – 7

Jimmy Eat World – 7

Rihanna – 7

The Roots – 7

Taylor Swift – 7

Weezer - 7


Most Top Ten Songs

7 - John Mayer

Kanye West

4 - Michelle Branch (solo, 2 and The Wreckers, 2)

Santana

3 - Coldplay

David Gray

Death Cab for Cutie

Jay-Z

The Killers

Ryan Adams

U2


Shortest Song: Fell in Love with a Girl – The White Stripes (1:50)

Longest Song: I Will Possess Your Heart – Death Cab for Cutie (8:36)

Longest Break Between Charting: 10 Years (Ben Harper, Steal My Kisses in 2000; Fly One Time in 2009)

Number One Songs by Year

2000: Maria, Maria – Santana featuring the Product G&B

2001: Everywhere – Michelle Branch

2002: Fell in Love with a Girl – The White Stripes

2003: The Seed (2.0) – The Roots featuring Cody ChestnuTT

2004: All Falls Down – Kanye West

2005: Landed – Ben Folds

2006: Crazy – Gnarls Barkley

2007: Drivin’ Me Wild – Common featuring Lily Allen

2008: I’m Yours – Jason Mraz

2009: Use Somebody – Kings of Leon


Mr. Irrelevant

2000: The Bad Touch – The Bloodhound Gang

2001: Standing Still – Jewel

2002: Friends and Family – Trik Turner

2003: Make Me a Song – Kiley Dean

2004: Some Girls – Rachel Stevens

2005: Give a Little Bit – Goo Goo Dolls

2006: Lithium – Evanescence

2007: This Ain’t a Scene, it’s an Arms Race – Fall Out Boy

2008: Stuck to You – Nikka Costa

2009: Let’s Take a Walk – Raphael Saadiq

Recasting We Are the World

When Michael Jackson passed away, like most people I went back and listened to the music of his on my iPod which included We Are the World. That got me to thinking it that there was still plenty of poverty in Africa and it may be time to remake the song for a newer generation (especially considering Do They Know it's Christmas? is already on it'd third version). While doing research, I realized the twenty-fifth anniversary was this year so I sat on the suggestions I made at the time so I could release it to coincide with the anniversary. Then new came out last week that the co-writers of the song Lionel Richie and Quincy Jones (along with Jackson) were planning on doing so after the Grammy’s next week to benefit Haitian relief (so I guess they will be renaming the group USA for Haiti). So here are my suggestions next to those that did the original part. And as a point of reference, here is the original song:




Lionel Richie – Ne-Yo

Stevie Wonder – Maxwell

Paul Simon – John Mayer

Kenny Rogers – Taylor Swift

James Ingram – John Legend

Tina Turner - Beyoncé

Billy Joel – Norah Jones

Michael Jackson – Michael Jackson

Diana Ross – Christina Aguilera

Dionne Warwick – Alicia Keys

Willie Nelson – Keith Urban

Al Jarreau – Justin Timberlake

Bruce Springsteen – dude from Green Day

Kenny Loggins – dude from Fall Out Boy

Steve Perry – dude from Maroon 5

Daryl Hall – Robin Thicke

Michael Jackson – Michael Jackson

Huey Lewis – dude from The Fray

Cyndi Lauper – Lady Gaga

Kim Carnes – Kelly Clarkson

Bob Dylan – Dave Matthews

Ray Charles – Jamie Foxx

Stevie Wonder – Stevie Wonder

Bruce Springsteen – Bruce Springsteen

Dan Akroyd – Adam Sandler

Jackson Family Chorus – Jonas Brothers and other Disney stars Chorus


Naturally the hardest singer to recast was Michael Jackson himself and came I up with three alternatives; Bono, who technically is not American; Prince, who was actually supposed to duet with Jackson in the original but didn’t show up the first time; or have a chorus do all his part. But maybe it would be best to just pipe in his original vocals. And even though I recast their earlier parts, I still have to bring back Bruce Springsteen and Stevie Wonder to recreate their duet which was the highlight the orginal. Not bringing them back would have been like not asking Bono to sing "Tonight thank God it's them instead of you" for the new Do They Know it's Christmas? versions.

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. CXIV

Hope for Haiti Now: Stevie Wonder singing Simon and Garfunkel, Taylor Swift covering Better Than Ezra, Jay-Z teaming up with Bono, The Edge, and Rihanna, Neil Young and Dave Matthews dueting, Chris Martin playing piano for Beyoncé, The Roots backing Shakira, Mary J. Blige, and Jennifer Hudson. It almost seems like a steal to buy all these performances, twenty in total, for $7.99, but you can download Hope for Haiti Now on iTunes and Amazon MP3 (see below) both of which also includes a studio version of the Jay-Z, U2, Rihanna song Stranded (Haiti Mon Amour). And you can also download the whole video in both places for $2.99. 100% of all purchases from either site will go to various Haitian relief charities such as Red Cross and the Clinton Bush Haiti Fund.



Chuck: We finally get to meet Shaw and no surprise it is Superman even though I still don’t see how he pulls rank on Beckman when, as Casey puts it, he has back issues of Guns and Ammo older than him. And it is not surprising dude is a tool either. And his big secret: he’s married? When he pulled out the ring I thought, Oh my, he’s part of THE Ring, then he put it on his ring finger and thought, that is an odd reveal. Could Superman’s wife possibly be the upcoming guest star Lana Lang? And the drunken Casey excuse: hilarious. You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.

How I Met Your Mother: Nothing groundbreaking as we have all had the Settler vs. Reacher debate (well, at least I have) and created our own stupid drinking game (well, at least I have). It was a little odd that they would bring in Amanda Peet for such a thankless role, especially when I would put a good chunk of change on her in a real fight vs. Alyson Hannigan. You can stream recent episodes over at cbs.com. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: Of course Sheldon hates Windows 7 because it is more user friendly. But I am shocked that he didn’t have a contingency plan in case, or to keep someone from robbing him. Like he hasn’t put a GPS on his gaming systems. You can download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Castle: I was just wondering when they were going to bring up Beckett’s mother’s death and here they do in a big way. And she kills the person who did it. Wow. But one thing that bugs me is who in the police force is signing up to be a decoy (sorry unlucky token Asian guy on the NYPD)? While putting on his bullet proof vest all I could think is the mark is a trained assassin, former marine and could probably easily take someone out with a headshot. Lucky for Token Asian Dude the plan itself was a decoy for the assassin. You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes. Also be sure to check out my chat with Stana Katic.

Mercy: Oh snap, Ronnie gets turned down because of a cat. I didn’t see that one coming. Although why was that Still Bill’s one premonition? Did I miss a scene wit Ronnie telling the comatose Still Bill she was? But I love how Dr. Sands’ inner circle consists of his drugged out sister, and the emotionally stunted bearded doctor. You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Mercy on iTunes.

Modern Family: Holy Dylan sighting! The really need to get this guy involved more often. I miss him and the Rusty Zippers. But I wonder if the show is getting too stale already. Last week it was pretty easy to figure out it was Phil downloading porn and this week it didn’t take a detective to deduce that Manny’s date was going to overaged (and then come on to the gay Cameron). You can stream recent episodes on Hulu.



Also check out my First Impressions of The Deep End.

Best of the Week vol. XXX

Quote of the Week: (Facebook) is all about finding people you never got a chance to sleep with in high school or college. It’s annoying. (Ronnie, Mercy)

Song of the Week: The End – Pearl Jam (Castle)

Big News of the Week: Scott Brown, Your Newest Senator: It is hard to be surprised by political outcomes considering our last three presidents were black, brain-dead from cocaine use, and a hillbilly (two of which were even reelected). There is even a politician in Minnesota that managed to lose to both Jesse “The Body” Ventura and Al “Stuart Smalley” Franklin. But it is hard not raise an eyebrow at the special election in the very liberal Massachusetts that filled the senate seat that was held by someone with the last name Kennedy for fifty-four of the last fifty-six years by a Republican. Not only that but a Republican who has posed nude, his wife appeared in a 1984 music video for Digney Fignus's The Girl With the Curious Hand (I have never heard of it either but of course it is on YouTube) and has a daughter who was on American Karaoke (and she is single fellas, as her father so elegantly put in his victory speech). God bless American.

Gratuitous Token Hot Chick Picture of the Week:



Free Download of the Week: Cousins (Video) – Vampire Weekend (iTunes)

Deal of the Week: Save Up to 56% on Boxed Sets (Mel Brooks Collection, Home Alone, X-Men Trilogy)

Video of the Week: The episode of Chuck I have been waiting for since I first heard Kristin Kreuk (who ranked in at #2 of The Hottest Hot Chicks of the 00's) would be appearing this season, and here is a promo of that episode, and as an added bonus, it also features Stone Cold Steve Austin. Color me excited.

Next On: Going Solo


Next Week Pick of the Week: Greek, Monday at 10:00 on ABC Family: When we last left Cypress Rhodes, Casey and her sisters burnt down a rival’s sorority house. That should lead to some entertainment when the show returns. What won’t will be Casey hooking up with Cappie which will probably be lame especially if the add Evan for a love triangle and Rebecca after that for a love quadrangle. I am not a fan of the newly late start time, but on an already crowded Monday, I most likely would have caught on Hulu later in the week anyway.

First Impressions: The Deep End

There are shows that are so bad they are entertaining (see Mercy or some of VH1’s Celebreality) and then there are ones that are just plain bad. The Deep End falls clearly into the latter category. It is hard to tell if the writers are morons are they expect the viewing public to be so. For instance there is plot point where a legal assistant is having problems with her boyfriend while simultaneously the boss’ wife thinks he is cheating on her. Then there is a “duh, duh, duh” moment at the end that the boss and the assistant were the couple even though anyone with a double digit IQ could have figured that out in the first act. Writing this bad is usually reserved for shows on The CW.

The bad writing is exasperated by the writers don’t seem to know if they want to be a drama or comedy and cannot to either very well and have horrible pacing trying to combine the two. Just the pacing in general was painful to watch as there are more than a few moments where I sit there wondering if I missed a scene or two as the plots just jump weirdly. But the most egregious writing problem was they made Dr. Harold Abbott completely unlikeable. That is something I never want to happen (please note he was also on the far superior Eli Stone which ABC dumped to air this crap).

The shame of it is, most of the cast is likeable headlined by Tina Majorino (Water World) as the push over of the new first year lawyers. Matt Long (Sydney White) is your Captain American of the group, Ben Lawson is your horny British dude, and the moderately attractive Leah Pipes (Sorority Row) as, well, the writers really didn’t define her character very well. All of them managed to almost get fired in the first episode and there was a fifth first year that showed up for half a minute and disappeared. And in the span of their first week four of them managed to sleep with each other (but not at the same time). But really, Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains cannot start soon enough.

The Deep Ends airs Thursdays at 8:00 on ABC. You can stream episodes on Hulu.

Around the Tubes vol. XXXV

I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on Caprica, How to Make it in America, Secret Diary of a Call Girl, Screen Actors Guild Awards, Ice Road Truckers, Men of a Certain Age, Yo Gabba Gabba! Live! and the Winter Olympics.

- The wait is over for Battlestar Galactica fans as the premiere of the prequel Caprica is tomorrow on SyFy at 9:00 (unless of course you already bought/rent the DVD, downloaded it on iTunes or streamed on Hulu, if so, be sure to return next week for a new episode). Below is the trailer. Fans will also want to check out the Caprica Facebook page.

New Caprica Trailer


- HBO is launching their new series next month, here is the trailer for How to Make it in America which will featuring the acting talents of Bryan Greenberg (Prime, HBO's Unscripted), Victor Rasuk (Lords of Dogtown, Raising Victor Vargas), Luis Guzman (Anger Management, HBO's Oz), Lake Bell (Boston Legal, What Happens in Vegas) and hit recording artist Scott "Kid Cudi" Mescudi (Man on The Moon, MOTOWN Records).


How to Make it in America Tease (HBO)


- A Week before the return of Secret Diary of a Call Girl, Showtime is airing an interview where the star of the show Billie Piper talks to the former call girl that her character is based on, Brooke Magnanti, the original Belle de Jour. It will take place this Monday at this coming Monday at 10:00.

- The 16th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards will be simulated on both TNT and TBS this Saturday at 8:00 (encore at 11:00) with the Red Carpet show starting a half hour with the live webcast at TNT.tv and TBS.com starting at 6:15. Betty White will be honored with the Lifetime Achievement Award at this year’s telecast.

- For the fans of Ice Road Truckers, you will want to check out the show’s new Facebook app.

- Robert Loggia will be showing up on Monday’s episode of Men of a Certain Age, which just got renewed for a second season, as Ray Romano’s recently retired father.

- For those with little ones running around who needs something kill the winter blues, you may want to check out Yo Gabba Gabba! Live! Of course you need to live near Minneapolis (3/13), Milwaukee (3/14), Toronto (3/16), Fort Wayne (3/19), Cincinnati (3/20), or St. Louis (3/21). Each date has two showings that day, check out yogabbagabbalive.com for more information.

- The Winter Olympic schedule is now online over at nbcolympics.com. As for the most important event, the start of Curling is Tuesday February 16 at noon on USA with the American men taking on the Germans. For some reason Curling doesn’t get a primetime slot all Olympics, but if we have learned anything from the last two week, NBC executives are not the smartest people in the room.

Got Nothing to Lose but Loneliness and Patterns

Spoon just may be the biggest band to never have actually hit it big. The formed right around the time of the alternative music boon of the mid nineties but were never able to capitalize on it before the tide turned to teen pop later that decade. They never cracked the top ten albums chart until 2007 at a time when people stopped buying albums. But the band had cultivated a loyal fan base many of which list their occupation as music supervisor because their music continually shows up in movies and television shows like the most recent episode of Chuck which generously used their song Got Nuffin off their latest album (their song Don’t Make Me a Target also got that treatment throughout a season one episode of the show).

If all you know of Spoon are those thirty second spurts on your favorite television shows, Transference probably isn’t the album that will convert you into a fan. In fact after maybe their most pop accessible album in their catalog, Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga, Transference is a big U-turn back to a very raw sounding which may be due to that it is the band’s first self produced album which was recorded in lead singer Brit Daniel’s house and why most of the songs feel like demo tracks.

The album closer, No One Gets Me But You, might as well be about their fans. The fly on the wall of a Spoon rehearsal vibe of the album is what the draw is for those with some familiarity with the band. Guitars are not tuned perfectly, Brit’s voice cracks mid song, and there is the charm of the album. It’s a live album without an audience with the band’s usual minimalist cool.

The tracks of Transference are quintessential Spoon; Before the Destruction sets up the album with a slow burn before switching to the bouncing along with staccato riffs of Is Love Forever. The band is at their best when they let loose with the cocksure and that most evident with their first two singles, Got Nuffin, which re-kick starts the album after the twin ballads before it, and Written in Reverse is a piano pounding track full will attitude.

Song to Download – Got Nuffin

Transference gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

Here Comes a Feeling You Thought You'd Forgotten

Vampire Weekend must be upset that they were born in the eighties instead of making music in it because they very may have been the biggest college radio band of the decade not named R.E.M. Maybe that is why they dress like a J Crew ad from the era. Now they have to resign to being the blogger buzz band of the month and sadly that month was in September 2007 and by the time their self-titled debut album was released in January 08, it seemed like the entire buzz died. Two years later, which in blog years might as well be eight, the band is back with their sophomore outing Contra (a reference to, the band insists, the awesome Nintendo game, not the political organization).

For the album, the band still comes up with melodies that would make River Cuomo jealous and music that weighs heavy on Graceland-era Paul Simon afro-centric beats and rhythms, but branches out into other influences such as synth-pop of the eighties, while the first single Cousins includes some surf rock flair right out of a Dick Dale song. On the flip side, the band also unfortunately discovers auto-tune on the reggae tinged California English which turns out to be a massive fail.

But the rest of Conta is the same preppy soundtrack fun you can find on their first album that will make you want to flip up the collar of your polo shirt while listening. Sure Cousins is a silly song, but try not to sing along to the chorus by your second listen. I have no idea what Horchata is, but I want to drink it at some high price resort drinking it, while listening to the song, I just won’t be wearing a balaclava (which they rhyme with the song title). Giving up the Gun is the culmination of everything the band strives to be, an assessable song with sing-a-long words, but is still a complex wall of sound where you can find a new blurt of sound every time you listen to.

Song to Download – Giving Up the Gun

Contra gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. CXIII

How I Met Your Mother: Didn’t we already have an episode where Marshall refused to acknowledge the hotness of a hot chick with Lily try to get him to say that while Robin tries to convince everyone she is hotter? If not I had a very strong case of déjà vu. You can stream recent episodes over at cbs.com. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: Holy Winnie Cooper sighting! Though why do CBS comedies misuse her, first she is part of a Ted three-way and now she is just a Raj hook up. You would think The Big Bang Theory would appreciate that she is a legitimate math genius with her own theory and actually give her a better role or spare with Sheldon for a Cooper vs. Cooper showdown of great television characters. You can download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Castle: As entertaining as it was to see Castle tried to get out of being duct taped to a chair, if he wanted to see how Nicky Heat got out of the chair, it would have been much more funny if he was able to get Beckett to take on the task. You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes. Also be sure to check out my chat with Stana Katic.

Mercy: Before this episode I would have said a hand is a hand, hook me up with whatever you got, but the whole “70% muscle memory” stuff really creeped me out to the point to unless it came from a surgeon, I may rather go with the Buster Bluth hook. You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Mercy on iTunes.

Modern Family: Last week I said that a whole pig would make for a great birthday present for me, and this week I would like to add a dog butler to that list. You can stream recent episodes on Hulu.



Community: Even though I saw it coming, Senior Chang’s entrance after being presumed dead was pretty funny. I ams till not sure why a community college requires two semesters of a foreign language though. But nice callback to Getting Rid of Britta, Oh, yeah, and Jack Black was in this episode. You can stream current episodes on Hulu. You can also download Community on iTunes.

Also check out my First (Second and Third Impressions of Chuck as well as my previews of Leverage and Archer.

Best of the Week vol. XXIX

Quote of the Week: Thanks for being on the case Nancy Drew. (Carina - Chuck)

Song of the Week: American Woman – The Guess Who (as performed by Raj, Sheldon and Winnie Cooper, The Big Bang Theory)

Big News of the Week: Jay Leno Hour Actually Canceled: Late last week, the intertubes were a flutter that Jay Leno would be banished from the 10:00 hour. I took it with a grain of salt because NBC really doesn’t have anything to fill that hour so I figured they would be stuck with him until Fall. But it was confirmed that Jay was being canceled and they wanted him back at 11:35 with The Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien pushed back to 12:05. Then the preverbal It hit the preverbal Fan. I am sure if you are reading this you know all the sordid details, so I won’t go into them, but isn’t it ironic that it took NBC demoting him to make Conan the must see TV NBC was hoping for when they announced his promotion five years ago. And if there was one good thing to come from NBC’s late night debacle, it is that Friday Night Lights finally got a premiere date: Friday April 30 at 8:00.

Gratuitous Token Hot Chick Picture of the Week:



Bonus Gratuitous Token Hot Chick Picture of the Week:



Another Bonus Gratuitous Token Hot Chick Picture of the Week:



Free Download of the Week: How I Met Your Mother - Nothing Suits Me Like a Suit (iTunes): I cannot say I was as enamored with the musical number from the 100th episode from the show, but for those that were, you can download it for free for you viewing pleasure whenever you want.

Deal of the Week: Save up to 53% on TV DVDs (Big Love, Castle, Friday Night Lights, How I Met Your Mother)

Video of the Week:

Out of Their League


Next Week Pick of the Week: The Deep End, Thursday at 8:00 on ABC: Okay, so from the promo above, there is a very good chance that this won’t be very good and at the very least nowhere as good as the lawyer show ABC recently canceled, Eli Stone. But like Eli Stone, The Deep End features a Veronica Mars alum in Mac and though he is not in the promo Dr. Harold Abbott is the hot blonds’ father. So maybe The Deep End is for lawyer shows what Mercy is for medical shows, so bad it starts to be entertaining. And at the very least it is something to watch until Survivor returns.

Lyrics Quiz: Best Songs of 2000

Long before the 9th Green ever existed, I was making lists of the year just for fun. Here is the list of the best songs I made a decade ago (I dutifully note that my 2000 self may not have had the best taste of music). As always leave your guesses, both artist and song title, in the comment section or e-mail me. If you are correct I will un-bold the lyric. Please keep in mind the lyrics quiz is for entertainment purposes only so please only use your own meandering mind to guess them. Now onto the lyric quiz:

1. She reminds me of a West Side Story. Growing up in Spanish Harlem. She’s living the life just like a movie star.  (Maria Maria - Santana featuring the Product G&B;  guessed by Taylor Blue)
2. You know the song by Phil Collins, In the Air of the Night about that guy who could have saved that other guy from drowning but didn’t then Phil saw it all and then at his show he found him?  (Stan - Eminem;  guessed by Doug)
3. ‘Cause there is a monster livening under my bed, whispering in my ear. And there is an angel with her hand on my head; she says I have nothing to fear.  (Put Your Lights On - Santana featuring Everlast;  guessed by Taylor Blue)
4. You love this town even if that doesn’t ring true. You’ve been all over and it’s been all over you.  (Beautiful Day - U2;  guessed by Anonymous)
5. Saturday I’m running wild and all the lights are changing red to green. Moving through the crowds I’m pushing, chemicals rushing through my bloodstream.  (Babylon - David Gray;  guessed by Rebekah)
6. I part with nothing. Y’all be frontin’. Me give my heart to a woman? Not for nothing, never happen, I’ll be forever mackin’.  (Big Pimpin' - Jay-Z featuring UGK;  guessed by Anonymous)
7. You (expletive deleted) remind me of a strip club, cause every time you come around it’s like, what, I just gotta get my (expletive deleted) sucked.  (Party Up (Up in Here) - DMX;  guessed bt Rebekah)
8. Just close your eyes each loving day and know this feeling won’t go away.  (This I Promise You - *NSYNC;  guessed by Dawn)
9. Love to think you couldn’t love another. Share a toothbrush; you’re my kind of man.  (Bathwater - No Doubt;  guessed by Doug)
10. I dream of love as time runs through my hand. I dream of fire, those dreams are tied to a horse that will never tire.  (Desert Rose - Sting;  guessed by Rebekah)
11. I bet you’re hard to get over. I bet the moon just won’t shine. I bet my hands I can stay here, and I bet you mean more than you mind.  (When You're Gone - Matchbox Twenty;  guessed by Doug)
12. If I could grant you one wish I wish you could see the way you kiss. (The Way You Love Me - Faith Hill; guessed by Anonymous)
13. It’s the perfect time of day to throw all your cares away. Put the sprinkler on the lawn and run thru with my gym shorts on.  (Pinch Me - Barenaked Ladies;  guessed by Doug)
14. Now I knocking like Jehovah: let me in now: Bill Gates, Donald Trump let me in now.  (Country Grammar (Hot...) - Nelly;  guessed by Anonymous)
15. Cookie: I met her at an ice cream parlor. Tonya, Diane, Lori and Carla, Marina, Selena, Katrina, Sabrina, about three Kim’s.
16. Come back, get back. That’s the part of success. If you believe in the X, you’ll be relievin’ your stress.
17. Just the other night baby, I saw you hanging, you were with your crew, I was with mine too.
18. So you can sit me here next to Britany Spears? Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs so I can sit next to Cason Daily and Fed Durst.  (The Real Slim Shady - Eminem;  guessed by Taylor Blue)
19. Down to the Earth I fell with dripping wings; heavy things won’t fly. And the sky might catch on fire and burn the axis of the world.
20. I just had to find a way I could meet her cause I’ve been dying for the chance just to treat her like the ripe little peach she is.
21. Monday night I feel so low, count the hours they go so slow. I know the sound of your voice can save my soul. (Be with You - Enrique Iglesias; guessed by Anonymous)
22. I'm not just talking about your sexuality but I can't help myself when you put your hands on me.  (Come on Over Baby (All I Want Is You) - Christina Aguilera;  guessed by Taylor Blue)
23. I wanna look at the horizon and not see a building standing tall.  (Cowboy Take Me Away - Dixie Chicks;  guessed by Taylor Blue)
24. …Like the open mouth of a grave. Not to stare up at me like a calf down on its knees.  (Don't Tell Me -Madonna;  guessed by Rebekah)
25. In my last years with him there were bruises on my face. In my dawn and new day I finally got away. But my head's all messed up and he knows.  (Still - Macy Gray;  guessed by Taylor Blue)

Previewing Archer

If I told you there was a show that reunited Lucille Bluth and her husband’s sectary Kitty Sanchez (and then throws in the usually funny Aisha Tyler and Chris Parnell), you would want to watch that right? Well the foursome lend their voices to the first animated show for FX Archer created by Adam Reed who you will know if you a fan of Adult Swim as he also created both Sealab 2021 and Frisky Dingo.

The half hour series follows a spy agency International Secret Intelligence Service (or ISIS for short) run by Jessica Walter (90210) and unfortunately due to some nepotism she feels obligated to hire her inappropriate and inept son Sterling Archer (voiced by veteran voice actor H. Jon Benjamin). Tyler (Talk Soup) plays his ex-girlfriend and current co-work that is currently dating Parnell (Miss / Guided) who is the complete opposite of Archer as the ISIS comptroller. Judy Greer (Love Monkey) is again resigned to be behind a desk and the company’s gossip who name I am not typing because I do not remember but because she changes it at least once an episode. The cast is rounded out by Archer’s abused butler George Coe (Funny People) and Amber Nash (Frisky Dingo’s Val) as the obese Director of Human Resources for ISIS who tries to hook up with any of her co-worker with little luck.

Tonight’s premiere is inappropriately funny with Archer and usually amusing for a spy show that doesn’t actually leave the office building (the first mission we see doesn’t happen until the fifth episode). The problem with the show is that it gets progressively less funny with each passing episode when the from left field jokes from Archer become not only less surprising, but start becoming expected from the character. Not necessarily must see television, but Archer may be something worth stopping on while flipping through the channels.

Archer airs Thursdays at 10:00 on FX. Full episode will be coming to Hulu soon.

Previewing Leverage 2.5

For some reason, TNT likes to split up it season in weird ways so tonight the second season of Leverage returns for its last six episodes. If you remember back five months to where Sophie decided to take some time off and recommended a replacement grifter to take her place why she figures things out in the form of Jeri Ryan. The last episode before the break saw Ryan conning the group to see if they were worthy of her help and tonight sees her first assignment in the group.

Not familiar with the altruistic nature of Nate and the crew, Jeri’s addition to the team is naturally rocky. She throws a few wrenches in the first couple episodes back that Sophie never would have. Including tonight when they infiltrate a sweat shop that employs illegal immigrants by exploiting the owner’s hope to be a contestant on Project Runway (which explains Nate’s garb in the picture above).

Next week things gets personal for Nate when the local bar’s owner dies and a loan shark tries to retrieve his mark from the decease’s daughter, who Nate thinks of as a niece, at the wake. The job has some dangerous consequences for Nate but for the viewer it has one of the most satisfying “gotcha” moments in the series history. Also in the second half of the season expect the return of Nate’s ex-wife (guest star Kari Matchett) and Luke Perry shows up during the February 3 episode as a psychic medium.

Leverage airs Wedensdays at 10:00 on TNT. You can stream recent episodes on TNT.tv. You can also download Leverage on iTunes or Amazon Video on Demand:

First (Second and Third) Impressions: Chuck

When the Intercet 2.0 was unveiled I had flashes of sharks jumping, but in the nine months since the Chuck finale I talked myself into everything being okay and even gave the chance of the that happening at 10 % during the latest round of Playing the Percentages. Then the first half of the two hour premiere happened and something was missing, the spark that made Chuck the second Best Show of 2009. Chuck was too mopey, there was little Jeffster, and Morgan returned from Hawaii. Sure there were some classic moments like Casey continually calling Chuck a lemon and the Token Hot Chick climbing out of the pool like a Bond Girl.




But the episode just didn’t come together. That was until Casey descended on Mexico with a big grin on his face because he got to use his massive gun. That was I finally realized Chuck was back. And not only was Team Bartowski was back, so was Carina who brought Vinnie Jones along for the ride (who kicks off the long line of guest stars Chuck will face off against this season). And as great a scene the engagement party was with Uncle Casey’s toast, Jeffter trying to drink Vinnie and his boys under the table during the housewarming party took the cake for the episode especially with Casey and his “Beware of Grumpy Neighbor” sign spraying down the festivities.



By the third episode in twenty-four hours, I was fully back on board thanks to some Casey fun and the inclusion of Captain Awesome to the team. Of course Casey would have tried to assassinate a communist dictator for his hero Ronald Regan in the eighties (and failed! Three times!) and naturally he get the nickname Angel of Death by the locals. The episode seemed very similar to the best Firefly episode Jayetown where they both go back to a place they are not welcome only to turn out to be a hero. Then The Ring strikes again kidnapping Captain Awesome which should led to another Awesome episode next week which cannot come too soon after getting three episodes in two days. And we still haven’t even gotten to the Lana Lang who showed up for a half a second in the season promo on Sunday which made me all giddy. Now if you excuse me, I have to pour out some bubbly in the memory of Buster Bluth.



Chuck airs Mondays at 8:00 on NBC. You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can download Chuck on iTunes or Amazon Video on Demand (see below along with the first two seasons on Blu-Ray and DVD):