57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. LXXIII

Before I get into this week’s 57 Channels, let me remind you that you can enter the My Boys Giveaway contest, click the banner at right to see the rules and how to enter.

Kings: Silas’ continual flip flopping on if he is pro or anti David is really going overboard. In three hours he has flipped about ten times already. But let’s move on to what may be the best part of the show in the palace guards who are turing into the Rosencrantz and Guildenstern of the show. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download Kings on iTunes.

Chuck: Two things about the past episode; 1) How dare the general besmirch Reagan. 2) Not only do I not think that Orion is dead but I would put money on Orion being Chuck’s long lost dad. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download Chuck on iTunes.

Survivor: Stupid recap show. Actually I didn’t mind if the guide had not said someone was going to get voted off. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube.



Lost: Oh my God, Sayid killed Ben! I know Bed should be stopped, but I thought kidnapping and/or brainwashing would have been sufficient. Of course not that I believe for a second that little Ben is actually dead or at the very least remain dead. And here’s a new theory for you: The reason why Locke, Ben, Sun, and Lapidus are not warping is because they were all “reborn” on the island at sometime. You can stream current episodes over at ABC.com.



My Name Is Earl: Now there was a plot twist I didn’t see coming even if after it was revealed a Joy I realized that the young Joy actress had portrayed her before (sans the pink hair). And it was nice for Randy to get some lovin’ on the show for once. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download My Name Is Earl on iTunes.

Friday Night Lights: I cannot count the number of goose bumps I got during this episode, from Lyla getting into Vanderbilt, Riggins taking her to church, Riggins blocking the punt (not that he would ever be part of the punt rush), to coach confronting Mr. McCoy in the rain and I am sure I am missing some scenes. And to juxtapose all that drama against things like Mindy’s quite literal wedding shower and Buddy and his crew doing their own redistricting (which should make for a great fourth season plot point). With all the goodness I am willing to overlook Dillon playing the State semi-finals in the rain again. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com.



DogTown: If you are interested in the dogs featured this week, you can check out their profiles on the Best Friends website. Click the link to go to their specific page. Mei Mei (the Chihuahua from the puppy mill), Charro (the Labrador with cancer), and Gertie (the Shih Tzu also saved from the puppy mill).

Best of the Week vol. XIV

Before I get into the Best of the Week, let me remind you that you can enter the My Boys Giveaway contest, click the banner at right to see the rules and how to enter.

Quote of the Week: A 12-year-old Ben Linus brought me chicken-salad sandwich. How do you think I'm doing? (Sayid, Lost)

Song of the Week: Making Love Out of Nothing at All – Air Supply (Chuck)

Big News of the Week: I’m Sorry Eric Cantor, You’re just a Tool: I spent a lot of time bashing Barack Obama last week, but the Republicans were quick to show that the democrats aren’t the only morons in Washington. The Republican Whip Eric Cantor not only passed the Presidents latest television interruption, but instead spent Tuesday at a Britney Spears concert.

And when you think a story about a conservative Congressmen going to a Brittney concert can’t get any stranger, he tried to explain himself. Apparently the same night as the Spears concert, the Truckers Association hosted a money raising event in the box at the Verizon Center. So not only did Cantor take in the Circus tour, he did so with a bunch of trucker. About the show, Cantor told CNN, “I hand it to the performer, she was something.” Ladies and gentleman of Virginia’s 7th Congressional District: your United States Representative!

Gratuitous Token Hot Chick Picture of the Week:



Coalition Links of the Week:
American Idol contestants keep getting criticized for their song choices, so Buzz whipped up a few guidelines to help the singers make their picks. (BuzzSugar)

Is it Vance or is The Real World: Brooklyn actually watchable this year? 11 episodes in and Vance doesn't really feel compelled to smack anyone yet. Prank yes, smack no. (Tapeworthy)

This week, Jace took an early look at the two-hour pilot of Sci Fi's new drama series Caprica, the prequel to Battlestar Galactica. (Televisionary)

Marisa's not ashamed of her school girl crush on Demitri Martin. He can totally rock the neck brace. (TiFaux)

Considering the casting of Ian Somerhalder and Paul Wesley, Matt thinks The Vampire Diaries will be as big as Twilight. Not that he's ever seen that movie. (TV Fanatic)

This week, theTVaddict.com put together our ultimate guide to TV stars on Twitter. (The TV Addict)

Free Download of the Week: Sub Pop Sampler (Amazon MP3): Most people remember Sub Pop as the record label that launched the grunge era. But the label has gotten more mellow in recent years as this sampler featuring Iron & Wine, Fleet Foxes and the comedy due Flight of the Concords. If the eleven tracks aren’t enough free for you, look at the Next Week's Pick of the Week.

Deal of the Week: TV Under $15 (The Lone Gunmen, Bionic Woman, Dog Whisperer)

Video of the Week: Despite getting a promotion, you almost have to feel sorry for Conan O'Brien. He is basically in a lose-lose situation thanks to his network undercutting him by still having Jay Leno as his lead in even when he takes over the The Tonight Show. Adn when NBC gave Leno a promo during the Super Bowl, the only commercial Conan got was a Bud Light one. But at least he can reest in the solace his ad is much better than Leno's and features the talents of Ice-T, Paul Rudd and Adam Sandler. That and he will get one of the biggest buy-outs when Leno wants his gig back.



Next Week Pick of the Week: Greek, Monday at 8:00 on ABC Family: Just when you thought Mondays couldn’t get more crowded, here comes the return of the best cable series not named Rescue Me (much more on that show next week). Considering the last season ended with Frannie coup of creating her own sorority and siphoning off most of the pledges, the new season should start off with a bang. If you forget or just want a refresher of the season finale, iTunes is letting you download it for free, as well as last season’s premiere episode, and in HD.

Contest: My Boys Giveaway and Season Three Preview

(Scooter's Note: This contest has ended. Congratulations to Emily in New York for winning the signed poster.)

This coming Tuesday (March 31) sees the return of TBS’s My Boys and in honor of the third season I have a poster autographed by the whole cast which you can see at right (click to enlarge, autographs will be added later). Answer the following question to enter the contest.

Since the show takes place in Chicago, what is your favorite historic monument or building in the city?

You can e-mail your entries to ScooterKSU(at)aol(dot)com (subject: My Boys). You can also get a bonus entrée f you link the contest; make sure you let me know you did in your e-mail where so you get credited with an entry. The contest ends Tuesday, April 7 at 11:59 PM EST. The winner will be picked at random from all eligible entries and will be contacted shortly after. Also this contest is only open to people with shipping addresses in the United States.

If you would like to double (or triple) up your chances of winning, I have noticed the good people over at Give Me My Remote and Pass the Remote are also running the same contest.

As for the show itself, the third season My Boys starts right where they left out at Bobby’s estate the day before his marriage to the nanny, Elsa. You may remember Bobby coming to PJ’s room the night before the wedding only to find her with his brother. Now something big happens in the first episode that I am forbidden by law to talk about which basically takes up the whole episode so there really isn’t anything I can say about it except the guys engage in a lengthy, and very funny contest that provides many of the episodes best line.

By the second episode, PJ has found herself a new beau except she has decided to keep it from her boys, and even Stephanie, which naturally doesn’t sit well with them. They decide to go undercover and of course hilarity ensues (just not as much as when the Nerd Herd had their stake out when Anna got a new boyfriend). And later in the season, the new relationship is put to the test when he joins PJ’s board game decathlon team. Check out below for a preview of the premiere:




My Boys airs Tuesdays at 10:30 on TBS. You can stream select episodes of the show over at TBS.com. You can also download previous seasons of My Boys on iTunes.

Previewing Locked Up Abroad

Remember back in the nineties where there was that kid that got caught spray painting graffiti in Singapore and it got national headlines because the government wanted to give him six lashes and even got referenced in songs by Ice Cube and “Weird Al” Yankovic? Well imaging they took Michael Fay’s trials and tribulations and made it into a series and you would get Locked Up Abroad premiering Wednesday April 1 on the National Geographic Channel.

What is cool about the show is that it is entirely told through the stories of those who lived through the ordeals who provide the narration and those are the only voices you hear aside from the occasional line from the actors reenacting the situation. The stories range anywhere from kidnappings, to home invasions, to those locked up in a prison.

The later is what you will see tonight as two British citizens get caught with cocaine going through a Peruvian airport. And if you have seen previous episodes, this will be a familiar story as this isn’t the first drug mule story the show has profiled (and looking forward to future episode synopsis, it won’t be the last). What sets this case apart, and dudes take note, is that only one of the travelers was aware that they were transporting drugs as the chick offered up a free trip to Cuzco and didn’t let him in on her extracurricular activities landing them both in prison. And to add insult to injury, the male prisons are much worse than the female ones.

You know things don’t go well for the guy when he says, “Sarah’s not only destroyed my life, she’s also destroyed my faith in humanity.” Ouch. I don’t think there are much harsher words in the English language he could have said. And you see the twist at the end of the episode you will completely understand why he says that.

Oh, and have I mentioned that there is gratuitous nudity in the premiere? Unfortunately not the kind I enjoy. Check out a clip (that does not have gratuitous nudity) below:



Locked Up Abroad airs Wednesday at 10:00 on the National Geographic Channel.

First Impressions: Better Off Ted

Whoever said that you can’t judge a book by its cover is a moron. If you see Fabio on the cover you are getting some chick-lit porn, if it is draped in the American flag it is going to be political. In fact, if you are unable to judge the book by its cover, whoever came up with the cover art should be blacklisted.

With that said, everything I needed to know about Better of Ted, I learned from the title because if that is the best title they could come up with, it is doubtfully they could come up with twenty minutes of funny. So I watched Gary Unmarried instead last Wednesday (I do understand the irony considering my initial premise) but ended up giving it a try after all of the Arrested Development comparisons.

Which I could see if Arrested Development was void of anything funny. Of course it wasn’t. Just because they pluck Lindsay Bluth-Fünke and have a narrator that routinely breaks the fourth wall does not make a strong comparison. The big difference between the two shows is that, despite all the bad things they do, most of the Bluths were still likeable whereas the Better Off Ted cast are annoying at their despicable doings save for the two scientist. But still I rarely chuckled at any of their antice where the Bluths were good for at least two you have to rewind because you missed something because you were laughing too hard moments.

Now maybe the biggest problem was they burned off many of their jokes in the advertisements that the channel ad nausea (I had the same problem with The Big Bang Theory) but I would still Sheldon Cooper over the lab rats Veridian Dynamics. And on Wednesday at 9:00, I would even take Louis Brooks over them.

You can stream episodes of Better Off Ted over at ABC.com. You can also download the show on iTunes or though Amazon Video on Demand (see below):

You Don't Know Fear Kid, You've Never Worked with Sam Raimi

Bruce Campbell is a national treasure even if most of the nation doesn’t know who he is despite appearing in all three Spider-Man movies (granted he played three different characters). But he was part of my formative years thanks to Army of Darkness and The Adventures of Brisco County Jr. Really, if the MTV Movie Awards were still hip and relevant, they would have giving him, or at the very least Ash, the Lifetime Achievement Award.

It is the cult like following that is the basis of My Name Is Bruce where Campbell plays the title character, himself. His exaggerated version of himself is a callow, egomaniacal hack who is hated by his co-workers, his ex-wife, and his agent (Ted Raimi in one of his three roles). The only people that don’t hate him are his legions of fans, but he’s working on alienating them too. But it is one zealous fan who just so happened to unleash the Chinese war deity Guan Di that figures the one person that could help him would be the star of Evil Dead and Maniac Cop 2.

But when the fan kidnaps Campbell, he goes along with it thinking it is an acting gig set up by his manager. And then the hilarity ensues. One drawback of My Name Is Bruce is the fake real life Bruce doesn’t exactly live up to the humor or wit of his onscreen version like Ash. And you wish for more catchphrases that you come to expect from Bruce characters. But this movie makes up for it in the terms of musical numbers and has plenty of in-jokes for the hard core Bruce fans and a few cameos from Evil Dead alums.

The big draw to the My Name Is Bruce DVD are the extra like the behind the scenes documentary that is almost as long as the movie itself. There is also a behind the scenes look at the movie within a movie that Bruce is filming, as well as a trailer for the fake flick included.

My Name Is Bruce gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

Previewing Heckle U

I may not have had a very good first weekend, but I can rest in the solace that I am beating Bachalk Obama. For those of you going through some March Madness withdrawal, staring at your clock hoping it is Thursday already, you will want to check out CBS’s new online series Heckle U. It is a mocumentary following two hecklers who couldn’t make it as athletes or even mascots. It stars Owen Benjamin (The House Bunny) as Chance, Kirk Fox (Forgetting Sarah Marshall) as Darrell, and featured Tom Arnold (Soul Plane) as Lou the Bartender. I laughed more during the first episode than I did during certain network sitcom debuts recently. Head over to CBS.com to see the first episode and check out three heckling rules presented by the duo below.










Please note Scooter McGavin or anyone at the 9th Green in no way endorses Head and Shoulders and did not receive any monitory or shampoo-type compensation from posting the banner above, but if anyone at Head and Shoulders is reading this, they are not above accepting any.

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. LXXII

The Big Bang Theory: Episodes that have Sheldon and Penny together for a lengthy portions never disappoint and this was no exceptions. Leonard walking in on them singing was the best. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

I Love Money 2: God bless Bones, trying to convince morality ton a French stripper. Of course he had no chance. Which begs the question, why does such a religious guy go on a reality show to try to date New York? You can also download I Love Money on iTunes.

Gary Unmarried: Wasn’t that the same teacher that beat the crap ou of Gary the last time we saw her? I guess she likes dudes who can take a punch even if he were two timing them. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube.

Lost: When everybody initially thought of Sun when it was mentioned that someone saw the pilot row off with a woman I scoffed thinking she had to have warped with the other and was stuck somewhere with Sayid because there was no way they could explain coherently why Sun didn’t flash but the other did. And of course I underestimated the absurdity of Lost.

But after racking my brain I actually came up with a theory as to why some people warp and some do not. Here it goes: Those born on the island do not warp. Now if you remember back to the season premiere everyone assumed that Miles was the baby of the Dr. Candle, but what if it was actually Sun?

Now there are some holes in my theory namely why doesn’t Ben not flash if he were born off the island and if the baby wasn’t Miles then why did he get a nosebleed before, say, Juliet. But it does sorta solve the why isn’t Locke warping in that he was “reborn” on the island. You can stream current episodes over at ABC.com.



My Name Is Earl: Holy Betty White sighting! And who knew she was such an evil witch? Granted it took me most of the episode to finally realize that yes, that was her. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download My Name Is Earl on iTunes.

Friday Night Lights: Poor Lyla, to learn that her father lost her college fund and to add even more insult, he lost it during a meeting in the Landing Strip while destroying the joint. But if she somehow finds her way to college next year, I may be okay if Madison joins the cast next year. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com.

Best of the Week vol. XIII

Quote of the Week: Please, Dateline could use it to attract predators. (Howard; The Big Bang Theory)

Song of the Week: I Put a Spell on You – Creedence Clearwater Revivial (My Name Is Earl)

Big News of the Week: Is the Obama Honeymoon Over?: It seemed like the new president had a longer grace period than most considering our economic problem seems to get deeper and deeper. But it looks like people are realizing that Barack Obama is still acting like he is campaigning instead of actually being presidential by still touring the country with his Chicken Little routine about the economy, sharing his bracket with ESPN, and appearing on The Tonight Show where he made a not so funny joke about the Special Olympics bringing the ire of Special Olympian bowler Kolan McConiughey who responded, “I’ll beat you.” But Obama is spending less time in Washington than George Bush.

But all the extracurricular activities look like they are starting to backfire. In response to the president’s bracket, Duke Coach Mike Krzyewski responded, “Somebody said that we're not in President Obama's Final Four, and as much as I respect what he's doing, really, the economy is something that he should focus on, probably more than the brackets.” And speaking of the brackets, of which Obama spinelessly picked chalk which would have gotten him ruefully mock any pool across the country, he also shamefully favored swing state schools (according to FiveThirtyEight.com) the few times he took a higher seed.

And the networks are taking note of his affinity of appearing on television, the latest bumping the highest rated show on television this coming Tuesday. An unnamed source recently said, “These repeated interruptions, and the rumor of even more to come, really make it difficult to build audience flow and loyalty. We will all lose one or two million dollars for this." Another mentioned: “These frequent primetime requests are wreaking serious havoc with our schedule and our advertisers. Ratings are down everywhere and the airtime is costing us all significant dollars when we can least afford it.” And if Chuck does not come back next season, Ben Silverman says you have Obama to thank for killing its post-Super Bowl momentum. But Silverman is a douche, so take anything he says with a grain of salt.

And most damning is that people are actually putting two and two together and realizing something is fishy that AIG donated more money to the Obama than to all but one Congressman in the past twenty-five year and their employees just happened to keep their bonuses. And when it got out, he proposes an unconstitutional attempt of taxing those bonuses at 98% making it seem like he is upset but not actually being able to exact a punishment.

Coalition Links of the Week:
GMMR asked if you were a network exec and could program TV for only one hour out of each day, what would the TV schedule look like? (Give Me My Remote)

Vance is enjoying the shows no one is watching. Like newbies Kings and Better Off Ted or old faves Ugly Betty and Lost amongst many others. (Tapeworthy)

This week, Jace talked to Joss Whedon about his "Man on the Street" episode of FOX's Dollhouse, why Dollhouse seems to lack the funny, and whether he would be leaving television for good. (Televisionary)

Sara celebrated the fact that Chuck was back to wearing ascots on the latest episode of Gossip Girl. (TiFaux)

Jennifer contemplated why Ugly Betty Suarez is such a man magnet. (Tube Talk)

Steve got his hands on a copy of next week's Gossip Girl and recapped it for your spoilerly pleasure (TVFanatic)

Ben celebrated the enws that BBC3 had bought the UK rights to the new murder mystery Harper's Island and took a look at it spin-off web series Harper's Globe. (TV Spy)


Free Download of the Week: Goliath – Kings (iTunes) - The season premiere was an odd bag but mostly enjoyable. If you missed it you can download it for free either on iTunes or at Amazon Video on Demand (see right). And you can also check out my First Impressions of Kings.

Deal of the Week: Sci-Fi Television Favorites & More: Save up to 56% (Buffy, The X-Files, Angel)

Video of the Week: Last night saw the season debut of Head Case and the new show from Rob Thomas (not the singer) and Paul Rudd called Party Down staring Dick Casablancas Vinnie Van Lowe, and Bill Haverchunk (also look out for guest appearances from Logan Echolls, Dean O’Dell, Keith and Veronica Mars). Not that I saw either on account that I don’t have Starz (but look for a review of season one of Head Case coming soon). But if you do, they are on Fridays at 10:00 and 10:30 respectively (and I presume repeated throughout the week). Below is a clip from Party Down:

Party Down: Kyle Discusses the Perks of the Job


if you are like me and do not have Starz, they actually uploaded the whole premiere of Head Case and Party Down to its YouTube channel.

Next Week Pick of the Week: Survivor, Wednesday at 8:00 on CBS: Notice the special day for Survivor thanks to March Madness. I originally thought this was going to be a simple recap show but the description says another contestant will be voted off. And if we are lucky it will be coach in a blindside.

Previewing DogTown

After the Michael Vick incident, even the people who despise PETA had to wonder what would happen to the dogs that he and his hoodlums were training to fight. Well they ended up at DogTown, part of the Best Friends Sanctuary, a Utah based no-kill animal shelter. And the reality show of the same named last year chronicled the rehabilitation of the Vick dogs whose progress will again be featured during the new season of DogTown which premieres tonight at 10:00 on the National Geographic Channel.

Some of the other stand out cases you can also expect this season are Aristotle (who is featured tonight and is pictured at left), a terrier mix who comes in covered in scabs from an undiagnosed skin condition. Then there is Rush, a shepherd mix airlifted out of Beirut, who had to have a leg amputated and who is traumatized by load songs after living through bombings in the city (April 10). And there are Haley and Hana, two dogs rescued from an underground cave in Ethiopia where strays are thrown into to die (April 3). And you will never want to adopt from a pet store after seeing dogs that were rescued from an overcrowded puppy mill (March 27).

Another heartbreaking story is that of Ava, a golden retriever who was found in a coyote trap. View a clip below.

Broken Paw


You can get more information about DogTown, the series, over at National Geographic and DogTown, the facility over at Best Friends. And of course if you want to see pictures of my dogs, head over to Ren and Snoopy’s Doghouse.

I Want My Music Television vol. XLVI

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I though I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.


Stay Up (Viagra) – 88 Keys and Kanye West



Even though the beat is pretty weak it is nice to hear Kanye West rapping again. And now that he has fulfilled his self fulfilling prophesy of leaving hid woman for a white girl he will stop singing those horrible emo songs and trash is auto tuner.


No You Girls – Franz Ferdinand



Franz Ferdinand is one of those bands that I need to be in a certain mood to enjoy (typically a parting type a mood which isn’t very much these days). But this new song is catchy enough to get me in that mood whenever I hear it.


Buggin’ Out – Consequence and Kid Cupri



I am always up for A Tribe Called Quest rehash and Consequence (who was featured on multiple tracks on Beats, Rhymes and Life and just happens to be Q-Tip’s cousin) does a stellar job recreating the song. But maybe goes a little too far with the bugging out metaphor in the video.


Sweet About Me - Gabriella Cilmi



Keep in mind when listening to the song that Gabriella Cilmi is a seventeen year old Australian. Her voice sounds like someone who has been drinking whisky for the past seventeen year. Maybe we should keep her away from Amy Winehouse.

It's March Madness Baby! 2009 Edition

March Madness seemed a little less mad
this year, or at the very least the brackets did. A lot of mediocre teams from big conferences made it in this year which means trying to pick upsets less fun. At least that was until yesterday’s Pardon the Interruption started calling for Congressional investigation into the NCAA for favoring major conferences over small ones. Hopefully when the tournament we do get some exciting games, but the tournament selection really robbed us of man y potential Davidson like runs this year. Now keep in mind you may be better off taking the advice of your little sister, but here are my picks for this year.

East
Finals: Villanova (3) over Xavier (4)
Upset Special: VCU (11) over UCLA (6)

Midwest
Finals: Louisville (1) over Kansas (3)
Upset Special: Dayton (11) over West Virginia (6)

South
Finals: North Carolina (1) over Arizona St. (6)
Upset Special: Western Kentucky (12) over Illinois (5)

West
Finals: Memphis (2) over Washington (4)
Upset Special: Utah St. (11) over Marquette (6)

Final Four
Louisville over Mephis
North Carolina over Villanova

Finals
North Carolina over Louisville 68-60

I didn’t notice until I wrote this that I have all the 11-seeds out in the first round except the one I have going to the Elite 8. Maybe an already ominous start to my bracket. Or may just be genius. But most likely stupid.

First Impressions: Kings

Can something be grandiose and boring at the same time? If so, than that can sum up Kings. The show has a look and feel like nothing currently on television and a scope not seen since Rome. But it is hard to not think the two hour premiere could have fit everything important into one hour to kill off some of the lulls.

The show is a modern day retelling of the story of David (Spoiler Alert for the heathens out there: He goes on to become king) set in a parallel universe and the fake country Gilboa (isn’t that where Anne Hathaway is a princess?) who is currently at war with their neighbors, the equally bad named Gath. In Gilboa, there is monarchy les by King Silas played by the overbearing Ian McShane (Agent Cody Banks) who lives a tangled life; he marries into money to set up his kingdom (of whom his brother-in-law is the main profiteer of the war); his daughter cares too much about his subjects and continually lobbies for better health care for them; his son is a royal version of Paris Hilton, right down to the parting and having sex with dudes. And of course there is the mistress with a kid of her own.

On the front line of the war is David Sheppard (who I cannot confirm is Mr. Boston from I Love New York, but I’m pretty sure it is him), an awe shucks country boy that can fix anything, including, apparently, wars. He gets tangled up with the king when he rescues the prince in one of the more laughable scenes as the soldiers of Gath acted like enemies is a crappy nineties video game. And as the preview promised, David takes the king up on his offer of half his kingdom by getting a dance with the princess.

Being based off of the Bible, there are plenty of religious references, many coming from then king’s personal guru, who naturally is not fond of the wars he wages and seems to be drawn to David (whom he creepily touches a few times in the first hour). And like most prophets he takes in vague terms and makes little sense.

Kings is ambitious but sometimes too ambitious for its own good. It has yet give a good enough back-story to the king and Gilboa, it is easy to compare it to America but under the surface seems to have little to do with this country besides New York City being the obvious standing for the faux the capital right down to Central Park overlooking the kings office. And the storyline of being in and out of war multiple times in a two hour frame was a little hard to follow. But once the show finds its footing, it could end up being the most compelling show on television.

Kings airs Sundays at 8:00 on NBC. You can stream current episodes at NBC.com. You can currently download the two hour pilot of Kings for free on iTunes and it is also free on Amazon Video on Demand (see below):

Lyrics Quiz: St. Patrick's Day

Recently I have been playing around with Genius in iTunes and have concluded that it doesn’t really live up to its name because I rarely have any, “wow, that is a great match” moments. Like when I put in Puff Daddy’s Been Around the World I’d like to see Davie Bowie’s Let’s Dance and/or Lisa Stanfield’s All Around the World instead of the generic rap of the late nineties. But anyways. It does make for a good Lyrics Quiz creator. For this month I threw in St. Patrick’s Day by John Mayer (on account that it is Tuesday). Now if it was truly Genius I would expect other holiday themed songs like Halloweenhead, The Thanksgiving Song, 4th of July Ashbury Park (Sandy) or anything from Christmas related, but alas. As always leave your guesses, both artist and song title, in the comment section or e-mail me. If you are correct I will un-bold the lyric. Please keep in mind the lyrics quiz is for entertainment purposes only so please only use your own meandering mind to guess them. Here are twenty-five songs that Genius did spit out for St. Patrick’s Day.


1. Anger, he smiles, towering in shiny metallic purple armor.
2. Am I the one who plays the quite songs? Is he the one who turns the ladies on?
3. Looking on, she sings a song. The words she knows, the tune she hums. (Tiny Dancer - Elton John, guessed by Angie)
4. Just remember the telephones; they work in a both ways. But if I never ever hear them ring. If nothing else I think the bells inside them finally found you someone else. And that’s okay.
5. There’s no one left to finger. There’s no one here to blame. There’s no one left to talk to honey and there ain’t no one left to buy our innocence. (Adia - Sarah McLaughlin; guessed by Angie)
6. She could keep anything from me. I could have been anyone you see. She’s nothing but porcelain underneath her skin.
7. When you’re sure you had enough of this life, to hang on. Don’t let yourself go. (Everybody Hurts - R.E.M.; guessed by Angie)
8. Your top was untied and I thought how nice it’d be to follow the sweat down your spine. (Dreamgirl - Dave Matthews Band; guessed by Angie)
9. You will never have the time. I would love to change your mind. You were there, and it was good in the beginning.
10. Come one, come all into 1984. Yeah three, two, one, lights, camera, transaction. (Talk Shows On Mute - Incubus; guessed by Jo)
11. There are many things I’d like to say to you but I don’t know how. (Wonderwall - Oasis; guessed by Angie)
12. I’m going to meet you, I’m gonna greet you at her back door as you’re coming out.
13. We’d hit the bottom. I thought it was my fault. And in a way I guess it was. I’m just now finding out what it was all about. (Landed - Ben Folds; guessed by Molly)
14. Finding what I really need is what makes me bleed, like a new disease. Oh, lord, she’s still too young.
15. Late nights won’t do me justice because when I drink I get so (expletive deleted) depressed and it’s not right. I ain’t trying to get over you.
16. Wish I had a dollar every time you say, “don’t you miss the feeling music gave you back in the day.” (Musicology - Prince; guessed by Angie)
17. I pulled into Nashville Tennessee. But you wouldn’t even come around to see me. Since you’re heading up to Carolina you know I gonna be right there behind ya. (Steal My Kisses - Ben Harper and the Innocent Criminals; guessed by Angie)
18. If you want it, come and get it. Crying out loud. (Babylon II - David Gray; guessed by Angie)
19. Flowers in her evening set I get the feeling she won’t forget. And there’s times you’d long to be her but to be her is surely blinding. (She's On Fire - Train; guessed by Angie)
20. Spin around one more time and gracefully fall back into the arms of grace. (Breathing - Lifehouse; guessed by Angie)
21. Well, I shuffled through the city on the 4th of July; I had a firecracker waiting to blow. Breaking like a robber who was making his way through the cities of Mexico. (New York, New York - Ryan Adams; guessed by Molly)
22. I have only come here seeking knowledge. Thing they would not teach me of in college. (Wrapped Around Your Finger - The Police; guessed by Angie)
23. I am surrounded by liars everywhere I turned. I am surrounded by imposters everywhere I turn. (I Don't Want To Be - Gavin DeGraw; guessed by Angie)
24. There was so easy living day by day; out of touch with the rhythm and blues.
25. Don’t know who I’m kidding imagining you’ll care. I could stand here a fool for another day. (Barely Breathing - Dunkan Sheik; guessed by Angie)


(Scooter’s Note: I plan to use Genius in future Quizzes, feel free to suggest a song you would like see run through Genius in the comments along with your guesses. Keep in mind I must have it to use it)