57 Channels and Only This Is On: May 14, 2023

 

Fatal Attraction:  Oh thank goodness, Lizzie Caplan killed the old lady (allegedly).  I thought she might have killed the dog.

 

The Blacklist:  I was befuddled when Red was still part of the task force assuming killing the one dude in a federal building without the FBI’s knowledge would be a step too far.  I guess it was as Red scrubbed himself from the record and did not show up to the meeting with the Committee Chair.  It just took a week longer than I expected.  But maybe the bigger news is that the new chick was adopted.  I have to assume this will somehow tie back to Red.  He cannot possibly be the father, van he?

 

Saint X:  My pick of the brunette chick got a good bump this week when she said she made a horrible mistake.  Though the preppy dude and the creepy pregnant couple were also implicated in that cold open.  Maybe everyone was there when she died. 

 

Class of ’09:  Well those first two episode were kind of a borefest.  Hopefully things pick up and soon.  Quantico was a pretty bad show, but at least it was not boring.

 

The Challenge: World Championship:  The show really needs to stop people like Tori and Kacee with their predetermined alliances on the show.  It makes it so boring to watch.   The veterans really ruined what could have been an entertaining season.  Those country specific shows were much more entertaining without them.

 

Survivor:  So are they not going to explain why the two chicks would rather the tribe breakdown to be 3-2-1 instead of 2-2-2.  That makes about as much sense as the guy with an Idol not playing it even though an Idol got played for the person he voted for.  What did he think would happen?  Clearly Tika was on to him so he basically had a one in four shot that the votes would come to him.  That may be a top ten dumbest play in the history of the show.  Almost as silly was the Tika saying they would be in the majority if the votes go their way.  It is still three-three and I believe they know that one of those three has an extra vote.  So they could easily get voted out with a three to four split.  Of course those two have to wise up and vote out a Tika next week and wise moves and been few and far in-between this season.  Thankfully only one episode left.  I am ready for this season to be over.

 

Titans:  That ending made no sense.  How did Superboy come back to life?  I knew he would, but at least put him under some yellow sun so it makes sense.  There are just too many of this inconsistency to name.  Good riddance to this poorly executed show.  It should have been much better.

 

Grease: Rise of the Pink Ladies:  I did not think I needed an episode dedicated to the T-Bird and after this episode, I gotta say, I was right.  Those kids have absolutely no charisma, especially compared to John Travolta.

 

Yellowjackets:  I was getting ready to write that this was the first episode where the modern day scenes were more interesting than the 90’s… and then Shauna had to go and punch Misty out of nowhere and just wailed on Lottie, so I think it may be a draw.  But still, I am disappointed that it took so long for all the girls to get to the cult (one of them noticeably said “we’re all here,” does that mean everyone else is a goner?).  The Misty tank may end up going down as the most entertaining scene of the series.

 

Speaking of the “we’re all here,” prior to that I believe Lottie mentioned that most everyone was there, but they hid the face to begin and for a second I thought maybe she was talking to Ben, whom Misty just talked off a cliff, before revealing it was her psychiatrist who turned out to not be there.  So it looks like my prediction that Ben kills himself is wrong… for now.  Though I did not see him in the brawl at the end.  What a weird scene, we all assume Ben is a goner, this seemed like a perfect time for him to go, his imaginary lover seemingly abandoned him, but in the end, Misty talking about there been too many deaths stopped him.  So is he actually going to survive?  I cannot image he will kill himself now, after being talked off the ledge.  Will they actually give him some sort of heroic death?  Coach Ben making it to season three may be the biggest shocker on the show, but almost seems likely now.

 

So much going on this episode which unfortunately means no time for Javi to explain what happened to him once again.  So one even mentioned that if javi could survive two months, Crystal could survive a couple days, no one in that moment thought to ask, yeah, Javi, how exactly did you survive in the freezing cold all alone for that month?  They really are going to drag this out all season, aren’t they?

 

Then we have to add the question of what happened to <strike>Crystal</strike>Kristen.  At least Javi is a healthy teenage boy even if dead-ass Jackie could not survive the same storm, <strike>Crystal</strike>Kristen was spitting up blood when given chest compressions, there is no way she could have gotten far.  Though maybe the question should not be did she move, but did someone move her?  I know I have been saying that this is a mystery box show and it would be silly to suggest that the same people that kept Javi alive for months saved <strike>Crystal</strike>Kristen, but I will put it out there just in case this does turn into a mystery box show.

 

With so much going on, it is almost easy to forget that the two remaining redshirts were the first to bring up cannibalism.  Kind of a big moment for two characters that have been so insignificant so far.