57 Channels and Only This Is On: 8/7/16

MTV Classic: A couple years ago VH1, in honor of MTV’s anniversary they devoted an entire weekend to the channel’s history with classic episodes of its shows and a couple documentaries. It was a great watch and made me think that is what VH1 Classic should be. And how about running full episodes of Yo! MTV Raps, Headbangers Ball, and 120 Minutes instead of random blocks of music videos in the morning. But then VH1 Classic went back to its rock heavy schedule and random movies that have nothing to do with music after the weekend was over.

So I got slightly excited when I heard they were rebranding VH1 Classic as MTV Classic bringing back classic shows from the channel’s history. The lauch started off well enough with an Unplugged marathon but I have been less than enthused since. Sure they show the occasional Beavis and Butt-Head, but so far they have been all episodes from the recent reboot and none from the nineties. And is any one setting their DVR for midnight airings of Run’s House? C’mon, where is Remote Control. And still no one is taking my advice to show genre specif shows in their entirety, instead we are still getting random videos in the morning. Really not the best start when the first one I saw was Vertical Horizon’s Everything You Want. Even worse, the first time I came across Yo! Hip Hop Hits, they were showing a video by Xscape, a fifth rate nineties girl group (featuring the future Mrs. T.I.) who are neither hip hop nor classic. Le sigh.

Ray Donovan: Did we really need to start off the episode with some dude pleasuring himself to a chick playing Cat’s Cradle? And just when you thought that was gong to be the most graphic part of the episode, a minute later we get to watch s full body cavity search. And then a couple minutes after that Conner pulls out some lubricant? Then after everything he went through with the Russians to get Belikov out of jail, he kills him over the Cat’s Cradle chick. That is probably not going to go over well.

Preacher: What the frack was that? Was that meant to not be coherent and meant to be a complete mess? How does an episode like that even make it to air?
You can download Preacher on iTunes.

Roadies: In the beginning I thought it was a wise choice to keep the band in the background and focus on the titular characters (and definitely we should never hear any of their songs because the worst part of these scripted music shows is they are supposed to be superstars but their songs are mediocre at best), but after Janine went HAM on the lead singer, the band instantly became extremely interesting. I actually want to see more of Janine as she writes her tell all and Chris’s reaction to all the revelations. And just how does Bill not get fired for sleeping with the lead singer’s girlfriend even if I took place a decade or so ago?

The John Mellencamp cameo made me wonder just where do some of these celebrity cameo stories come from. Did Cameron Crowe ask them for the personal stories like the one about the hundred year old grandmother that could fit in the show? Are they strictly written for the show? Are they stories Crowe has heard and asked the celebrities if he can use it on the show?

BrainDead: I figured Laurel would find a way to get the bugs out of her head before they push out half her brain, but I thought she would simply go to the refrigerator and put some bacon on her ear. Instead we got maybe the most entertaining segment on television this year.
You can download BrainDead on Amazon Instant Video, free with a Prime membership.

Pretty Little Liars: Seriously promo monkeys, we are already to the countdown portaon of the season. I get annoyed with the “one more episode until the (insert hyperbolic adverb here) finale” promo but four more episodes is a bit much. Sad thing is, that is most of what I remember from this episode. Um, Alison got attacked by someone and it turned out to not be her dead fiancée who is still in the ground. It probably was not Sara who ended up dead. Um, evil(er) twin maybe?
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Mr. Robot: Well at least we did not start with a cute flashback this week. And good news for anyone who was wondering what Angela’s douchebag ex-boyfriend was up to. Otherwise, meh.
You can download Mr. Robot on iTunes.

Tyrant: Oh hey Barry, you are really doing that days after your daughter died and hours after your wife checked herself into a mental institution? Cold.
You can download Tyrant on iTunes.

The Challenge: Rivals III: What a horrible ending to a horrible season. What a completely douche thing to do even by Johnny Banana’s standards. At least he cannot possibly get another invitation back after that and even so, how is he not sent into whatever they are calling the elimination round every time? What is worse was the whole point thing was kind of shady; I never really got the standing on the log checkpoint, and making things worse it was worth two points. Why not just stay on the log and refuse to leave?
You can download The Challenge: Rivals III on iTunes.

2016 Rio Olympics Opening Ceremonies: Not a very good sign for these games that I fell asleep somewhere around the M’s during the parade of nations. I am ready to call it the worse opening ceremonies of my lifetime. I know Pele was sick, but how was the biggest name at the ceremony Giselle? Was there really no one more important from Brazil? I was ready for Camilla from The Challenge or Abi-Maria from Survivor to pop up.