For Those About to Rock

One of the shows that has quickly become must see television has been VH1’s Hip Hop Honors that for the past to years have given props to the genre’s founding fathers with performances by the artists and tributes by rappers of today. So to capitalize on that success, about a month back VH1 announced that is was going to do its first ever Rock Honors. I was a little skeptical when I heard this because, just from a logistical standpoint, it much harder to pull off. All rappers need are two turntables and a microphone. To have the band, and another as doing a tribute, there will be a lot of time devoted for changing between bands. So instead of paying tribute to about eight rappers, all we get are four bands. And those four inaugural bands: Hendrix? Cream? Zeppelin? AC/DC? Well, nope, nope, nope and nope. Here are some thoughts on the first Rock Honors:

- Jamie Pressly is are host most likely because she looks like every woman you see at Ozzfest, well the ones you see backstage at Ozzfest (which I know from experience). The best part of the whole show is when that huge nerd who comments for I Love the (Insert Decade) tells her “My name isn’t Earl, but his is” when he points to, well, Little Earl.

- The first honoree is Queen who performs a couple songs with Foo Fighters and some dude not named Freddie Mercury. Queen was always a little too theatrical for my taste. But anyways. They did do a really cool version of We Will Rock You with three drummers. I seriously doubt that any song will dethrone that song as greatest stadium anthem ever. And even the dude not named Freddie Mercury can’t screw up the song because it’s all about fan participation.

- Next up is Judas Priest who is preceded by having Godsmack do a medley of their songs. Seriously, if it weren’t for Beavis and Butt-head, I probably would never of heard of Judas Priest. And watching his leather-clad performance, you gotta wonder, much like George Michael, how no one figured out Rob Halford was gay. And add this to the previously honored Freddie Mercury; this is turning out to be a pretty gay show. Well this is VH1.

- The All American Rejects are next to pay tribute to Def Leppard with Photograph. This ended up being the biggest of their songs performed tonight.

- I have to say, when I think of rock, the first thing that comes to my mind is the chick from American Dreams. Although I guess it’s only appropriate that she introduces Def Leppard because throughout their career, their main fan base was teenage girls. And I may be dating myself, but whenever I hear that German opening, my first thought isn’t Rock of Ages, but rather Pretty Fly for a White Guy. Then for some reason in lieu of Pour Some Sugar on me they perform 20th Century Boy, the old T-Rex song. Oh, that’s right; the song is part of their new cover album that everyone ignored when it came out last week.

- To honor the final group, Kiss, VH1 assembled an all star lineup that included Rob Zombie, Slash, and Scott Ian, who happens to currently be staring in VH1’s reality show, Supergroup, as well as Gilby Clark and Tommy Lee who will be participating in the next Rock Star incarnation coming this summer on CBS (by the way both VH1 and CBS are owned by the same company). Boy and girls, today’s word of the day is synergy.

- Closing out the show is Kiss. I wanted the best, but all I got was a bunch of extremely old dudes in face paint. I’m not sure what is more sad, the band or the old dudes who still worship them. An anticlimactic end to a mediocre show.

- Hopefully next year they ask for my input on whom to honor. If for some reason you want to see the show, you can watch it anytime on VH1’s broadband channel VSPOT which includes four performances that weren’t even good enough to make it into the broadcast version.