The Voice Season Eight Blind Auditions Power Rankings

It seems to me The Voice has been on a downward slide ever since season three. Sure season seven was a bit better since it was the first time in two seasons I made it to the live shows without giving up, but it was still pretty underwhelming making me consider giving up on the show all together. My biggest problem was that in the first three seasons the show recruited professional singer, be it Warped Tour singers or Alicia Keys backup singers. But around season four, the show started slowly morphing into the amateur show that made American Idol unwatchable. Where there were over ten singers from the first three season I already had music of in my library before they appeared on the show, only one singer has since.

I actually became hopeful for season eight when Jason Isbell, formally of The Drive-By Truckers of which I own a couple of songs by, mentioned on social media that the show invited him to a private audition. By his tone it sounded like we would not see him singing solo vocal and French horn rendition of Oh Comely by Neutral Milk Hotel to the back of four chairs anytime soon which he said he would do in a bikini (the guy's last album, which swept the Americana Music Awards, did better than every Voice winner's album except Cassadee Pope's) but it gave hope that they show will go back to recruiting professionals again.

Alas as we close out the Blind Audition the only recognizable names this season were someone who was in the somewhat successful Steel Magnolia country duo who once toured with Blake (one of their songs did find its way into my library) and someone who Carson claimed to be part of "the legendary DeBarge family" but it turned out she married into the family (on the flip side, there seemed to be even more teenagers than usual). The latter was montaged despite doing a Jill Scott song, a first on the show by the former (and arguably the best) adviser to the show. I am usually the pro montage guy but this season they skipped over a couple auditions I actually wanted to see (and there were a lot of montages as they cut the Blind Auditions by one hour this season for no apparent reason; hopefully the Battle Round gets cut too, I would much rather have less Battles than Blind Auditions). Aside from the first time anyone sang a Jill Scott song on the show, we also only got snippets of the first time for Jane's Addiction, Arctic Monkeys, Vampire Weekend (this show really hates alt-rock apparently), and Anna Nalick. But hey, at least They also montaged a Sam Smith song after using what seemed to be his entire catalouge last season.

Oh well. I do not know how long I will stick this season out because no one really overwhelmed me with their audition, but here is how I rank this year's contestants on their first impressions.

1. India Carney (Team Christina)
2. Deanna Johnson (Team Adam)
3. Brooke Adee(Team Blake)
4. Ashley Morgan (Team Pharrell)
5. Treeva Gibson (Team Christina)
6. Meghan Linsey (Team Pharrell)
7. Jack Gregori (Team Adam)
8. Anthony Riley (Team Pharrell)
9. Brenna Yaeger (Team Blake)
10. Kimberly Nichole (Team Pharrell)
11. Rob Taylor (Team Christina)
12. Brian Johnson (Team Blake)
13. Gabriel Wolfchild (Team Christina)
14. Jeremy Gaynor (Team Christina)
15. Tonya Boyd-Cannon (Team Adam)
16. Noelle Bybee (Team Pharrell)
17. Mia Z (Team Pharrell)
18. Koryn Hawthorne (Team Christina)
19. Barry Minniefield (Team Adam)
20. Joshua Davis (Team Blake)
21. Nathan Hermida (Team Adam)
22. Sarah Potenza (Team Blake)
23. Katelyn Read (Team Christina)
24. Briar Jonnee (Team Pharrell)
25. Kelsie May (Team Blake)
26. Sawyer Fredericks (Team Pharrell)
27. Bren'nae DeBarge (Team Adam)
28. Caitlin Caporale (Team Pharrell)
29. Hannah Kirby (Team Blake)
30. Cody Wickline (Team Blake)
31. Corey Kent White (Team Blake)
32. Lexi Dávila (Team Adam)
33. Nicolette Maré (Team Adam)
34. Paul Pfau (Team Pharrell)
35. Michael Leier (Team Adam)
36. Joe Tolo (Team Christina)
37. Blaze Johnson (Team Adam)
38. Sonic (Team Christina)
39. Travis Ewing (Team Pharrell)
40. Vance Smith (Team Christina)
41. Bay Brooks (Team Blake)
42. Jacob Rummell (Team Blake)
43. Lowell Oakley (Team Pharrell)
44. Ameera Delandro (Team Christina)
45. James McNeiece (Team Adam)
46. Clinton Washington (Team Christina)
47. Josh Batstone (Team Adam)
48. Matt Snook (Team Blake)

For reason unknown to any reasonable person, The Voice shaved the Blind Auditions by an hour leading to an awkward Best of the Blinds recap before the Blinds were actually over last week and an episode that had both Blind Auditions and Battles last night. I was hoping they would also cut the Battle Round by an hour or two but if the TV Guide is to believe, there will be six hours worth of Battles this season just like last with three Battles per hour like last season. Seriously, if you are going to cut a pre-taped round, it should be the Battles. Or at the very least go back to four Battles per hour. But anyway. Below is how strong the teams were not considering what happened in the second hour by assigning a reverse order to each singer and adding up each team from my ranking.

Pharrell - 333
Christina - 299
Blake - 276
Adam - 268

So Pharrell easily has the best team (granted he lost one of his best last night; I actually though two of the three winners should have been picked by their coaches; but they were both stolen anyway) Adam, who the producers what us to think he had a hard time recruiting anyone to his team in the first episode yet filled his team first, is pulling up the rear. Of course this may have been a correct narrative since Deanna was really the only marquee battle he was able to convince to join his team. But for a coach who seems to only care about one of his singers per season (the guy openly admitted in an interview to sabotaging his team back in season one to make it easier for Javier Colon to make the finals), one good singer is all he really needs.

But who cares what I think, here is how this season's contestants ranked on iTunes.

1. Sawyer Fredericks (26)
2. Cody Wickline (73)
3. Deanna Johnson (99)
4. Joshua Davis (112)
5. Travis Ewing (153)
6. Brooke Adee (157)
7. Mia Z (259)
8. India Carney (284)
9. Michael Leier (310)
10. Anthony Riley (319)
11. Treeva Gibson (325)
12. Meghan Linsey (382)
13. Nathan Hermida (403)
14. Sarah Potenza (416)
15. Cory Kent White (424)
16. Blaze Johnson (452)
17. Jeremy Gaynor (484)
18. Gabriel Wolfchild (494)
19. Brenna Yaeger (530)
20. Brian Johnson (552)
21. Josh Batstone (544)
22. Ashley Morgan (648)
23. Lowell Oakley (660)
24. Paul Pfau (682)
25. Jacob Rummell (739)
26. Rob Taylor (780)
27. Tonya Boyd-Cannon (830)
28. Joe Tolo (989)
29. Barry Minniefield (1012)
30. Kelsie May (1065)
31. Caitlin Caporale (1081)
32. Matt Snook (1225)
33. Jack Gregori (1224)
34. Bay Brooks (1465)

If you use the methodology I did above, here is how the team stack up on iTunes:

Team Blake - 184
Team Pharrell - 170
Team Adam - 129
Team Christina - 202

Thanks to only have one member of his team missing iTunes (even his two montaged contestants even made it on the list; the one that missed, Hanna performed last night so she may actually squeak on after this post goes up) he tops everyone. Poor Christina, half of her team did not even crack the top 1500 so if she does not chose wisely in the next two rounds, she could finish last for four of her five seasons.  Will she actually be smart enough for once to take singers who are iTunes bait like Treeva and Gabriel, two of her three best performers on iTunes, to the Live Shows or will again stack her team with mini-Christina's like Sonic and Koryn who will likely make quick exits like she usually does?


Alright, lets get to prediction time, here who I think will reach the Live Shows this season (though not on necessarily on the team they are currently on) ranked on how confidant I am with the singer advancing that far.

Team Adam
Deanna Johnson
Tonya Boyd-Cannon
Jack Gregori
Nathan Hermida
Joshua Davis

Team Blake
Cody Wickline
Brooke Adee
Sarah Potenza
Brian Johnson
Brenna Yeager

Team Christina
India Carney
Gabriel Wolfchild
Ashley Morgan
Rob Taylor
Treeva Gibson

Team Pharrell
Sawyer Fredericks
Meghan Linsey
Anthony Riley
Mia Z
Caitlin Caporale

I stuck with five per team, but I have feeling as many as eight singers who started out on Pharrell's team make it to the Live Shows with as little as three of original Team Adam members make it (I can also see Adam stealing Paul and taking him to the Lives with Josh and maybe even a third Steal). I was not bold enough to predict a montage contestant to advance even though there were an overabundance of them this year. If I were brave enough I would think about picking Noelle Bybee but only if she gets stolen because I highly doubt she beats Sawyer who got the pimpiest of all pimp slots, closing the first episode. But if she would get stolen it would probably be by Blake who would probably just use her as Knockout Round fodder.

Previewing The Returned

Back in 2009 after watching Zombieland I declared the era of the vampire over and the teens (if that what we are calling this decade?) the era of zombies. I made that statement in part jest and part wishful thinking after growing tired of bloodsuckers. even stop watching anything starring one since the series finale of Angel (Let Me In being the one exception in the decade since). Shocking one of my predictions actually came true, vampire are passe and The Walking Dead is the biggest show on television.

Now there is a new subsection of stories of people returning from the dead, but they do not come back immortal like vampires or want to eat human flesh or brains like zombies, they return pretty much like nothing happened. And to make things confusing, they are all called The Returned. So try not to confuse the new show The Returned, based on the 2012 French show Les Revenants, (which aired as The Returned on Sundance TV in 2013) which was based on the 2004 Fresh film of the same name (but named They Came Back for English release) premiering on A&E tonight with ABC's Resurrection which premiered last year and was based on the 2013 novel also named The Returned but has no connection to the French film or television show.

Yeah, that kind of gets confusing and only more show when you watch the premiere episode which starts with a kid returning home after dying four years earlier. Though she does not wake up in China, this girl climbs out of a ravine from where her bus drove over four years ago. A couple other souls (presumably) return to the dead but much of the narrative stays with the teenage girl in the first episode. Each episode is named after a Returned which focuses on them, a very Lost type of storytelling which has specific character-centric episodes (both shows being run by Carlton Cuse).  There are even flashbacks, though they seem to only happen one at the beginning of the episode with the only exception so far being the end of the Pilot.

Where it is very hard not to think of Resurrection while watching The Returned I will say that I enjoyed The Returned premiere more than Resurrection because of a pretty shocking plot twist at the end of the first episode when they flashback and show you why exactly the girl dies the first time. And hopefully The Returned gives more answers than Resurrection did (and will probably ever will because it probably will not get a third season; plus my sources tell me the book it was based on was not very forthcoming with answers either). I am not sure if the French program gave many answers because I did not watch Les Revenants on account that I watch television to avoid reading.

Another advantage The Returned has is acting. Sure it was good to see Willie Mays Hayes #2 on the small screen, but The Returned has Ramona Flowers herself Mary Elizabeth Winstead herself in the cast. And she is not the only recognizable face: there is also Jacob from Lost! the dad from Suburgatory!! the daughter from Treme!!! Alice from Wonderland (the Once Upon a Time crappy spin-off, not the movie)!!!! Anna Nicole Smith from the Lifetime movie..... and that is just the main cast, you will also see Sydney's partner from Alias and the extremely depressing  mother from The Killing pop up from time to time too.

Those are just the recognizable cast members, and that is just half of them. It is very Lostian in size, ten in total (and to be honest about the acting, two of them are really kind of bad at it), granted not much in diversity in this very WASP-y community. Even worse the show is severely missing a Hurley type of comedic diversion. There is a nosy neighbor but she probably asks the wrong person if a cat has got his tongue that may cause her not to be around much in future episode.  But it does seem like Cuse is in a battle with his former partner Damien Lindeloff to who could create the more depressing show between The Returned and The Leftovers (which i hear is extremely depressing).

One aspect The Returned did successfully take from Lost is setting up what will be much talked about plot twists among fans, the huge and freaky one at the end of the first episode that I mentioned earlier made me quickly queue up episode two. Not surprisingly everyone in this small town has secrets in their pasts and much like the dead, the secrets will eventually rise to the surface (the dad from Suburgatory has a particularly juicy one which will undoubtedly come back to haunt him in more ways to one). Hopefully the producer from Lost has learned better timing this time around because one of the bigger flaw of that show it took way to long to pay off plot twists (did anyone still care how Locke lost the ability to walk by the time the show revealed it three or four season later?) and we do not have to wait to learn what is behind everyone secrets.

The Returned airs Mondays at 10:00 on A&E following an all new season of Bates Motel. Last season we learned that Norman gets very violent when he blackouts and can also pass lie detector tests while out, Dylan leaned his uncle is probably also his father (Kenny Johnson's name now presides in the main cast), and the town's biggest drug kingpins got offed. The third seasons starts with the DEA burning the town's cash crops, Norman getting ready for senior year, and Dylan is ready to go legal. Revolution's Tracy Spiridakos shows up as the motel's latest inhabitant and like the previous people who passed through she pays with money that was obtained not very legally. And if the promo's are correct, she will also inspire Norman to learn how to use a power drill.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 3/8/15

Once Upon a Time: Seriously, no one noticed the smoke monster slither out of the magic hat? And if Mr. Gold is such an evil genius, why wait at the city line for a sea hag that in no way should help you get back into Storybrooke when you could just stowaway in the truck of the car? But when your adversaries are dumb enough to believe someone stole your phone and just happened to call you out of nowhere, you look like a genius next to them.
You can download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

The Walking Dead: Last week I suggested there will end up being something nefarious about Alexandra, but watching this episode I am beginning to think that Rick and company will be the antagonists to the city folk, not the other way around. And why did no one offer Carl a haircut too?
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Marvel's Agents of SHIELD: I was hoping through Skye's transformation she would find a new hairstyle, but alas, it is for not. overall kind of a meh episode even with the Hydra take down and the new Raina. Is it possible they can get Agent Carter into a time machine and inserted into this show?
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes

Justified: So Limehouse did sell out Ava and yet Boyd does not irrationally kill her like Dewey (aside from a brief question from Raylan last week, does anyone care that he has been missing since the first episode; Dewey deserves justice). Boyd cannot possibly trust her anymore (which is why he gave her a gun with no bullets), so I wonder if he will eventually (try to) get rid of her once he knows for sure what Raylan is doing.
You can download Justified on iTunes.

The Challenge: Battle of the Exes: Welcome back Nany, who wastes no time getting into her first fight. Whoever decided to put her in slo-mo while Bananas puts a fist in his mouth deserves a Emmy for that editing.
You can download The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II on iTunes.

Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar: I was racking my brain trying to think of a time when an entire tribe was blindsided by a vote where an Idol was not involved. And what a horrible move, Will went from the swing vote and in control of the destiny of his tribe to the least liked person in the tribe that no one can trust. This show is at its best when it is filled with morons and this season has its fair share of them.
You can download Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar on iTunes.

Hindsight: You gotta love any show that starts off an episode with a Toad the Wet Sprocket deep cut. Though I do not understand why Becca just does not stop Kevin right away, she know what it does to her relationship with Lolly and it is clearly not something that lasts because she end up with Andy. But kudos to Lolly for deciphering that Letters to Cleo song.
You can download Hindsight on iTunes.

The Americans: After two and a half season, are we finally going to get two plot twists that should have happened at the very least last season? The promo sure makes it looks like Paige will finally learn about her parents' double life and that one of the Jennings will actually get caught after too many close calls.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

The Blacklist: Television has been littered with countless characters that should have been killed off a lot earlier than they did which range from just rolling your eyes whenever they walk on screen to completely ruining a great show, something that will forever be known as "The Brody." Tom is currently closer to the eye-rolling portion of the spectrum right now, but the show should have really killed him at the end of last season, he serves no purpose now.
You can download The Blacklist on iTunes.

King of the Nerds: It became pretty obvious that I would have no chance on this show. During that name as many nerd culture things as you could, I probably only would have done good in the movies and Mario Kart categories. Though I would have crushed the Stratigo Nerd Off. C'mon, you always put the flag in the front row if you are playing someone smart.
You can download King of the Nerds on iTunes.

Around the Tubes: 3/6/15

I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on Broadchurch, the MTV Movie Awards, Most Expensivest (Expletive Deleted), The Big Picture With Kal Penn, Sleight of Mouth, That Which I Love Destroys Me, Cold Justice, Ask This Old House, Those Who Can't, and Sharknado 3.

- Broadchurch, winner of multiple 2014 BAFTA Awards, including "Best Drama Series", and the highest-rated drama on British television returns for its hotly anticipated Second Season on March 4. Following its BBC America premiere - details of which remain a closely guarded secret -- mystery buffs, TV aficionados and anglophiles will be able to purchase each episode of Season Two to stream or download from all major digital download platforms, exclusively from Entertainment One.

- MTV just revealed the nominees for the 2015 MTV Movie Awards. Channing Tatum, Emma Stone, Shailene Woodley, Zac Efron, Ansel Elgort, Scarlett Johansson and Rosamund Pike are among the celebrities receiving multiple nods. Starting now, fans can cast their votes for their favorites at MovieAwards.MTV.com through Saturday, April 11. Voting for “Movie of the Year” will continue throughout the live broadcast of the show. The 2015 MTV Movie Awards will be hosted by comedian Amy Schumer, and the telecast will air LIVE on Sunday, April 12 at 8:00 PM ET/PT from Nokia Theatre L.A.

- Platinum selling, GRAMMY-nominated recording artist 2 Chainz has teamed up with GQ again for the highly anticipated second season of the hilariously entertaining web series Most Expensivest (Expletive Deleted). In each episode, host 2 Chainz showcases the most outrageous toys of the rich, revealing the most rare, sought-after, and expensive extravagances available today.


- With the explosion of infographics and big data, maps aren’t just about geography anymore. They can tell us all kinds of things about the human experience. National Geographic Channel’s (NGC’s) new series The Big Picture With Kal Penn is all about finding the unexpected — and sometimes surprising — realities in both the world at large and our own backyard, revealed by crunching the numbers and finding new ways to visualize data. Produced by National Geographic Studios, The Big Picture With Kal Penn premieres on Monday, March 30, at 9:00 on NGC.

- Standout comedian and magician Justin Willman is breaking new ground with his one-of-a-kind comedy-magic show, Sleight of Mouth. Executive produced by @Midnight host Chris Hardwick and Nerdist Industries, Brillstein Entertainment Partners’ Alex Murray, and Emmy-winning producer Robert Morton (Late Show with David Letterman), this irreverent special is peppered with original sketch comedy, tech-savvy modern trickery, and cannabis-fueled social experiments with Doug Benson and Paul Scheer. “Only on Comedy Central can a guy do magic for stoners in a pot dispensary then go head-to-head with child-geniuses in the same half-hour,” Willman says. Airing at 12:30am on April 6, Sleight of Mouth will kick off immediately following Justin’s return appearance on @Midnight with Chris Hardwick.

- Participant Media’s digital magazine and social action platform for the conscious consumer TakePart.com, today announced that Ric Roman Waugh’s powerful documentary That Which I Love Destroys Me is available on demand at no cost throughout March at TakePart.com/vets. Viewers will have the opportunity to show support and make a donation in any amount to the Armed Forces Foundation (https://armedforcesfoundation.org) via TakePart's donation tool (powered by CrowdRise). Viewers will also be able to take action via TakePart’s Take Action Platform on other vets-related issues, at TakePart.com/return-the-service.

- As TNT's Cold Justice continues to bring closure to long-unsolved cases this winter, the powerful, real-life investigative series is already gearing up for the spring and summer with 12 additional episodes for the show's third season. TNT has also ordered two new Justice Served specials hosted by John Walsh (America's Most Wanted). The specials will update viewers on victims' families and the status of cases as they have proceeded through the legal system. In addition, the spring edition of Justice Served will include a look at Cold Justice: Sex Crimes, TNT's new series set to launch this summer. Cold Justice airs Fridays at 8:00 on TNT, with availability via TNT On Demand and TNT's digital and mobile platforms the following day. The show's winter finale is set for March 6, with the spring episodes slated to launch April 10.

- Coming up on Ask This Old House this spring, the team visits Orlando, Florida; Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania; Wheeling, West Virginia; Cleveland, Ohio; and Portland, Maine, while also tackling projects in the show's home base of Massachusetts. As always, these episodes will feature the latest technological innovations including a house call and lesson from Richard on a new smart thermostat that automatically programs itself based on a cellphone's GPS. Electrician Scott Caron will lend a hand to a homeowner installing a charging station for an all-electric vehicle, and Richard's son, Renewable Energy Expert Ross Trethewey, will guide TV audiences through a solar photovoltaic installation on the Ask This Old House barn.

- Making its first foray into full-length scripted comedy, truTV has given the greenlight to Those Who Can't. The comedy about a trio of frustrated high school teachers stars show creators Adam Cayton-Holland, Andrew Orvedahl and Ben Roy, members of the Denver-based comedy troupe The Grawlix. The series is being produced by Thank You, Brain! Productions and 3 Arts Entertainment. truTV has ordered 10 episodes of Those Who Can't, with plans to launch by early 2016. Set in Denver, the half-hour comedy follows three dysfunctional high school teachers – played by Cayton-Holland, Orvedahl and Roy – who are about as screwed-up as the kids they teach. Maria Thayer (Eagleheart) plays Abbey Logan, a new librarian who questions, denies and then joins in on the antics of her co-workers.

- A new Administration is taking office before January 2017! Syfy and The Asylum today announced that Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban (Shark Tank) will play the President of the United States with political commentator/author Ann Coulter joining him as Vice President in the eagerly anticipated original movie Sharknado 3.

I Want My Music Television: 3/2/15

Every Moment - Jodeci


I feel bad for anyone under twenty because they have not lived in a world where there was great RnB music being made. The nineties was the last great era of the genre and since then there have been good albums but Alicia Keys and John Legend, but not that much else. The best RnB album of the nineties was Diary of a Mad Band by Jodeci. The group released one more album after that before splitting. It has been twenty years since that last album and now the boys are back to show these youngin's how its done. Sure Every Moment is not great, no one at this point wants to see a music video set in the snow, and K-Ci is slowing morphing into a Dave Chappelle, but mediocre Jodeci is better than no Jodeci and much better than pretty much everything else that passes as RnB this millennium.

From Eden - Hozier


One of my favorite pastimes is checking out a follow up single from a newly minted pop star and debate with myself if the new song can lift them out of one hit wonderdom. 2014 was a weak year for new artists. You had Sam Smith but he quickly got a second hit. Same for Meghan Trainor and Iggy Azalea (though I do wonder if history views them like Vanilla Ice, someone who had a legitimate second hit, but some still think of him as a one hit wonder). The only new artist that is still looking for that elusive second hit is From Eden - Hozier. Listening to his debut album, I did not hear a second hit, but hearing From Eden (dude loves his religious metaphors) outside the context of the album, and I do think it has some potential, though ultimately think it will not make much of a dent on the pop charts. The music video is kind of interesting, we have seen the Bonny and Clyde motif many times before, but this is the first time a kids was involved, well, if you do not count Raising Arizona.

Fly - Maddie and Tae


Though they never crossed over, I guess you could also call Maddie and Tae a country one hit wonder from 2014. And they are kind of the trickiest of one hit wonders as Girl in a Country Song was essentially a novelty song bordering on a "Weird Al" Yankovic type style parody of the bro-country movement. But it is not an impossible stigma to shed: look at Beck, from Loser, a one hit wonder if I have ever heard one, and two decades later he collected an Album of the Year Grammy. But where Beck pushed the boundaries of music on his Loser follow up, Fly pretty much sounds like a sound Martina McBride could have sung back when Beck was starting out.

Nothing Without Love - Nate Ruess


Fun. also quickly exited one hit wonderdom back in 2012, but could they end up in the elusive one album wonder category with all their hit off the same LP. Guitarist Jack Antonoff released a side project last year (oh yeah, Bleachers is another act from last year on Wonder Watch), and now another member is going solo but Nate Ruess was quick to note the band has not broken up when announcing his solo work. Smart move because Nothing Without Love sound like Nate is destined for no hit wonder territory alongside the lead singer of The Killers the members of Blink-182 and Fall Out Boy. The song sound like a middling, non-single Fun. track.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 3/1/15

The Walking Dead: The biggest problem with the show is that the show is predicated on the character being completely stupid for it to be any good. The smart thing to do in a zombie apocalypse would be to join up with as many living people as possible to beat back the zombie hoards. The smart thing to do back in season one would have been to join forces with the nursing home people, but had they done that, that show would have been extremely boring. So our protagonists are stupid. Which leads us to this week. The smart thing would have been to jump in the camper and ride up to Alexandra and enjoy all the homemade applesauce they would let someone else force down their throats. Instead we get an entire episode of Rick being paranoid when the alternative is that his group starves to death. Of course Rick has every reason to be cautious because the homosexuals will obviously turn out to be evil like every other group they have run into since they opted out of the nursing home: The Governor was a megalomaniac, Terminus was full of cannibals, even the cops in the hospital were basically using slave labor. Now the only question is what demented thing are these Alexandrians in to. Well, besides forcing their children to eat applesauce against their will. That is the evil cult I want to run into when their is a zombie apocalypse.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Gotham: After The Dark Knight trilogy I was hoping for a little more lighthearted Batman adaptation as a follow up. I was not expecting The Brave and the Bold or even Adam West type cheesy fun. If Man of Steel was any indication, Batfleck will be as dour as Christian Bale and the show is not much cheerier. That is why I liked all the silly comedy associated with the Red Hood this week. Unfortunately the mail characters went to darker places this week with Alfred getting stabbed and, oh goodness, why did Fish scoop out her own eye and step on it? When she said their was a option C, how did that be the only thing that crossed her mind? Fish Mooney has quickly moved into Brody territory of why did they not kill them off much earlier then they actually did? Really she is only behind Brody and Otto from Sons of Anarchy (who also lost and eye and was into self mutilation) on that list right now.
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

Marvel's Agent Carter: It has become Marvel tradition that the final scene is dedicated to some big plot twist or recognizable star making an appearance. I figured that scene for the season finale of Agent Carter would be dedicate to her being the first S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. Nope, they went with the more shocking route with the dude from Captain America lurking in the shadows. That will be a formidable big bad team for a potential season two. Instead of waiting until next winter, how about another eight week season this summer?
You can download Marvel's Agent Carter om iTunes.

Justified: Poor Choo-Choo, it did not quite have the Of Mice and Men ending as it teased, but still sad. I thought maybe he would make it when the train stopped but alas, it looks like he is gone. And the plot twist just kept coming, it is clear the Lawnmower Man set up for Boyd to go down that hole, but why? And why exactly did Limehouse sell out Ava?
You can download Justified on iTunes.

The Challenge: Battle of the Exes: Stupid promo monkeys. From the very introduction of Ex-ile in the first episode, we have heard Sarah say, "This changes evvvvvvverything" and they play her saying that basically every week, or very least on every episode. So it was pretty clear she and Jordan would still be around by the time TJ announces the twist to the unsuspecting competitors still around. This lead to little drama in the dome as it was clear Sarah would be back. Speaking of spoilers, the promo for next week really looked like Nany's ponytail making their return inevitable (of course if the show were scripted, then Nany and Bananas would obviously be the ones chosen to get back in the game). But they do have to go through the behemoth that is Zach, but since he just lost a strength based dome, it is very possible.
You can download The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II on iTunes.

Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar: The show is at its best whenever it divides its tribe along specific attributes, well except the age season, that one not surprisingly turned out bad. And the show needs a good season after the disastrous last season when it became how flawed Blood vs. Water was. No one really stuck out as someone to root for, I kind of want to do that for the "hearing advocate" (hey, it is better than coconut vendor and this is the No Collar tribe) but the promo monkeys make it look like she is not long for this game.

One thing that really stuck out to me is how much this season resembles Brains vs. Brawn vs. Beauty. White Collar are the Brain, Blue Collar are the Brawn, an though they are not all that attractive, No Collar do share some attributes of the Beauty tribe. And just like the previous season, the White Collar are trying way too hard to outsmart each other early like the Brains tribe did. You just cannot take the deceit that early in the game and if you do, you better come up with a better excuse then what they did. Poor So, pretty much was voted out because of it.

Except that was a really dumb play on the White Collar tribe. The move was to vote out Carolyn, first off she seems really annoying, is old, and most importantly has the Hidden Immunity Idol. The two swing guys should had targeted her, if she does not play the Idol, a weak and annoying player is gone; if she does play it, oh well, So goes home and the Idol is flushed out.

Since I see this season playing out like Brains vs. Brawn, vs. Beauty, that means a White Collar will not win because they will try to out think each other, eventually playing themselves out of the game; the No Collar will turn on each other early and often (that love triangle cannot possibly end well); so that mean a Blue Collar wins. I just hope that the Masshole does not turn out to be this season's Tony, so I will predict Mike as the winner.
You can download Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar on iTunes.

Hindsight: I thought the music supervisor really screwed up when Vanessa Carlton started playing at the beginning of the episode. But they threw a curve and eventually let us know they flashbacked (or forward depending how you look at it) to 2003. Lolly's normal looking hair should have been the hint at the time. Granted later in the episode during the 2003 timeline they did use the nineties Sarah McLachlan classic, so the music survivor did much that up a little.
You can download Hindsight on iTunes.

The Americans: It seems like Philip has ninety-nine problems, and they are all (expletive delete). Two wives and two fifteen year old's. The Jennings have done some pretty morally corrupt acts on the show, but seducing a fifteen year old have to be number one.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

Nashville: It seems like every week things go from bad to worse for Layla, but shockingly something went her way this week getting signed by Rayna (off of a kind of crappy song, but alas). But then it looks like she already sabotaged that relationship but hiring Rayna's archnemesis Jeff as her manager. Bad move Layla.
You can download Nashville on iTunes.

King of the Nerds: Well that was disappointing. I was kind of hoping that the secret six five alliance would make the wrong decision and Colby would send another one of them home. Oh well.
You can download King of the Nerds on iTunes.

Around the Tubes: 2/28/15

I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on The Great British Baking Show, Motown 25, The Cove, Dreamcatcher, Chili's, and Epix.

- It’s the finals... From thousands of applicants, 12 bakers made it to the tent -- and now, just three remain in the hit series The Great British Baking Show on PBS. Episode ten airs on PBS Sunday, March 1 at 8:00 p.m. ET, before Downton Abbey. (Show times may vary, please check local listings in your market). Last week, contestant Richard was named “Star Baker” for the unprecedented fifth time, while Chetna was sent home, however the three remaining contestants, Richard, Nancy and Luis start anew in the series finale.

- Where were you when Michael Jackson unveiled his iconic moonwalk for the very first time as part of the legendary TV special Motown 25: Yesterday · Today · Forever? You likely remember those "six seconds that changed the world", as the historic concert televised by NBC on May 16, 1983, became an immediate sensation and water-cooler event in an era before social media. Now, music lovers and pop culture aficionados alike will have the opportunity to see magic and history being made as the Emmy® Award-winning program will air exclusively as a fundraising event on public television stations this February and March, marking the first TV broadcast of the concert since its debut more than 30 years ago. It will make its national public broadcasting premiere on February 28 at 8:00 (check local listings).

- This Sunday, March 1st at 8:00, The Cove will make its television premiere on Participant Media’s television network, Pivot. Ric O’Barry’s Academy Award® winning documentary exposes the slaughter of more than 20,000 dolphins off the coast of Japan occurring each year. The film follows O’Barry and his team of activists as they uncover the environmental crimes that are happening in Taiji, Japan and explore the impact it is making worldwide.

- Following its recent win at the 2015 Sundance Film Festival, Dreamcatcher will premiere on Showtime on March 27th at 9:00. The film is an inspirational portrait of Chicago’s Brenda Myers-Powell whose Dreamcatcher Foundation fights to end human trafficking and prevent the sexual exploitation of at-risk youth. To view the trailer go to: sho.com.

- TBS is hitting the road with a 10-episode order for a new comedy series from The Daily Show's Jason Jones & Samantha Bee. Jones stars in the series, which is inspired by his and Bee's own experiences with family getaways. Also starring are Natalie Zea (Justified, The Following), Ashley Gerasimovich (Louie, We Need to Talk about Kevin) and Liam Carroll (The Neighbors). Production is slated to begin this summer, with the TBS launch scheduled for Q4 2015.

- I’m sure you remember the Chili’s Baby Back Ribs jingle as one of the most recognizable in recent brand history. For the restaurants 40th anniversary, they’re asking musicians, songwriters, and everyday people to sing along as they recreate the famous jingle from the 90’s. On March 14th, 2015 during what they call “St. Chilihead Day”, Chili’s Grill and Bar will celebrate by posting an anniversary video featuring submissions from this social activation. Here’s the video they shot over 4 days with many musicians to kick off the campaign: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysAe_DdZO-E
Viewers can share their version at http://SingBabyBack.com.

- EPIX this week announced that it has extended its agreement with Amazon to license thousands of new releases, classic library titles and original programs for Prime Instant Video. Programming from the agreement includes movies from EPIX studio partners, Paramount Pictures, Lionsgate and Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures, and delivers new releases such as Transformers: Age of Extinction, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Interstellar, Selma and The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1, along with classic big film franchises including James Bond, Star Trek, Rocky and more.

Previewing Unlikely Animal Friends: Season Two

For those that have been seeing the Android commercial over the last month or so with animals of different specials paling around like a dog swimming with a dolphin in their "Be together, not the same" ads and thought to themselves, that should be its own television show, you are in luck. There is already one. Even better Unlikely Animal Friends returns tonight with all new episodes.

The premiere episode really starts off going for the heartstrings with a two legged Chihuahua and his best friend a silkie chicken (check out of a clip of the duo), both of who have become unofficial mascots of a veterinarian's office. Also on tonight is a squirrel who hides its nut in a dog's fur, mountaineer and his rock-climbing cat and hear the incredibly sweet tale of the goat who refuses to leave his donkey friend’s side. Later on this season, get to know a Hawaiian surfer who hangs ten with his pet pig, a blind woman who relies on a guide horse and an immobilized cat that’s protected by a faithful dachshund.

Learn more about a California man who hangs ten with his surfing goat, hear the tale of the cockatoo who enjoys giving massages to her once-feral feline friend and meet a hunting dog whose best friend and co-worker is a two-and-a-half-foot-tall Eurasian eagle owl. Get to know a farm dog who loves to mother a wild orphaned fawn, an autistic boy who connects deeply with his flock of chickens and a rat who loves to hang around with a feline friend. Meet a boy who was saved by his heroic family cat, a dog who mothers a “goat puppy” and a man who spoils his pet deer. Learn more abot a dog and cheetah cub duo, a soldier who found a friend in a time of war and a pair of Dalmatians who adopted a kitten.

It seems like every time I write about something from Nat Geo Wild I have to warn animal lovers there are multiple animal on animal attacks, Unlikely Animal Friends is one of the show where two animals that may be enemies in the wild become best friends. It is also the rare show the whole family can enjoy.

Unlikely Animal Friends airs Fridays at 10:00 on Nat Geo Wild.

I Want My Music Television: 2/23/15

One Last Time - Ariana Grande


Admission time: I kind of actually like Ariana Grande. One giant drawback is that everyone she collaborates with pretty much sucks massively sans The Weeknd, but I still think that song would be better without him. Finally Grande has released a song without any features as a single (I may have went with Why Try instead). Much like the song, the video is cheesy fun even if I am not entirely sure if that was the director's intention. Speaking of the director who is credited as Max Landis, is he at all related to John Landis, director of possibly the most famous music video of all time: Thiller?

Time Machine - Ingrid Michaelson


Sure Fiona Apple and Zach Galifianakis pretty much did this exact video and did it better a couple years ago (and there are three people in the video I do not even recognize; the dude on the beach and the golfers), but Ingrid Michaelson's indignation every time someone starts singing in her place is still pretty entertaining.

Irresistible - Fall Out Boy


Speaking of video concepts that were done earlier and better, the new Fall Out Boy video reminds me of Hootie and the Blowfish's Only Wanna Be With You but with the ESPN anchors.

Black Bat Licorice - Jack White


Jack White has been making novelty vinyls for years not it is surprising he has not made a novelty music video until now where Black Bat Licorice is three interactive music videos in one which you can watch over at JackWhiteIII.com. Since that is not embeddable, I though I would share this live performance of the song featuring Q-Tip. Yes you read that right.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 2/22/15

The Saturday Night Live 40th Anniversary Special: That somehow managed to be awesome and a complete mess at the same time. Sm basically like every SNL episode ever. The great moments were great: Bill Murray singing The Love Theme to Jaws, Emma Stone, Wayne's World, Jerry Seinfeld's Q&A, Turd Ferguson, R.I.P. Jon Lovitz. But the bad was really bad: Did anyone get excited for another installment of The Californians which was almost inexplicably saved by David Spade (I wish there were more generational cross pollination), the ESPN guys, Eddie Murphy's weird acceptance speech type appearance, and why have Jimmy Fallon and Justin Timberlake since forty years of catchphrases when ninety percent of the people who originally uttered those phrases were sitting the crowd, yet the only ones included were Debby Downer and Mary Catherine Gallagher.

Plus all the musical performances seemed unnecessary except Paul Simon (and it was nice that they brought back G.E. Smith); did we really need to hear Paul McCartney horsely sing Maybe I'm Amazed (at least it was not Hey Jude for the millionth time; the weird country version of 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover (with no Vanessa Bayer sighting); which was only out-weirded by whatever Kanye West was doing. They could have cut those to give more time to Weekend Update, maybe all the guys could have read some fake news too even though the greatest anchor Dennis Miller was conspicuously absent from the evening, but it was funny during the retrospective that the the one Norm McDonald joke they showed was an OJ one considering it is assumed he was kicked off the show because of too many Simpson jokes.

And why have Jack Nicholson of all people introduce the political package when they could have had all the presidential impersonators intro that. I wonder if what stopped them was a lack of Ronald Reagan without Phil Hartman or Dennis Quaid (though Jim Carrey does a very good impression) or maybe they could not decide which of the five who did W Bush would represent. But overall it was an enjoyable walk down memory lane.

Shameless: Jimmy is back and of course Fiona made a bad decision because that is the only kind of decision she seems to make. Sure she kicked him out in the end, but I have a feeling that will not last long because her husband will undoubtedly walk in on them at some point. I do find it odd that there is no episode tonight, the show went head to head with the Super Bowl, but takes Oscar night off.

The Walking Dead: It is clear this show is at its best when the group is separated because this episode was quite boring until the guy at the end who knew Rick showed up. I take it he was the friend with the water.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Gotham: Last week's promo teased the arrival of The Joker (um, his first name is really Jerome?) but we also got our first glimpse of Robin. Well, sort of, but not really. No Dick Grayson's were mentioned but I am just going to go ahead and assume that the couple who said their were going to name their first child after him will be Robin's parents. I though for sure when the female was protesting the name I was convinced she was going to say something like, "I though we decided on Richard." Oh well. But I kind of like how excited Brody's wife was about helping Gordon out with the case.
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

Pretty Little Liars: Those dance montage sequences may have been the most entertaining part of any episode of this show. Why couldn't Hanna training for a pageant be an entire season plotline?
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Marvel's Agent Carter: I was mildly surprised when Peggy got caught last week, but the Chief throwing himself out the building was a huge shock. Guess he will not be back if there is a second season. Not that anyone but Peggy would because it seems clear this season will end with the creation of S.H.I.E.L.D. and Peggy as its first agent.
You can download Marvel's Agent Carter om iTunes.

Justified: Oh Constable Bob, where have you and your taser been all season? Though Ava trying to leave town just seemed like filler even if the taser and the cattle prod were entertaining byproducts of that storyline.
You can download Justified on iTunes.

The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II: Last week Zach almost a legitimate Of Mice and Men reference and this week he gave a, albeit warped, parable from The Bible; how did he not win the trivia challenge? But clearly T.J. enjoys trivia week way too much. I am guessing it was his idea to swaddle the contestants like babies and unwrap them when they lose. Disappointingly no one gave completely inane answers except when Leroy answered "Africa" when T.J. was looking for a country.
You can download The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II on iTunes.

Hindsight: A couple weeks ago the show highlighted one of my favorite songs of all time, R.E.M.s Nightswimming and this week they pulled out another personal top ten, All I Want Is You by U2. I will forgive that the song actually came out in the eighties (though you could argue it is a nineties song because it was on the Reality Bites Soundtrack). The rest of the episode was pretty much a filler, Becca and Australian dude broke up, again; the two boring people did not break up again, instead got married. But next they do promise all the questions will be answered, so there is that. At the very least, it will still have an awesome soundtrack.
You can download Hindsight on iTunes.

Nashville: Oh snap, Rayna just got Jeff fired (and looking at the previews, sinks the whole label in the process). And poor Layla, about to get her shot in front of the owner and the meeting gets canceled after Jeff gets fired. Nothing is ever going to go right for that girl
You can download Nashville on iTunes.

King of the Nerds: I have been out on Under the Dome for the entirely of the second season, but who knew the chick from that show was extremely cool? Get that girl on more talk show people.
You can download King of the Nerds on iTunes.

Around the Tubes: 2/21/15

I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on The Great British Baking Show, Killing Jesus, Simple Minds, Barely Famous, Killer IQ: Lion vs. Hyena, CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, Adam Ruins Everything, Sharknado 3, Walk of Shame Shuttle, Hot GRITS, and Backstreet Boys: Show ’Em What You’re Made Of.

- Viewers will feel the palpable tension as the four bakers enter the semi-finals in the critical hit series The Great British Baking Show on PBS. Last week, contestant Richard was named “Star Baker” for the record-breaking fourth time, while 17-year-old Martha was sent home. In this week’s episode “Patisserie,” the bakers showcase their creative design and time management skills as never before. Episode nine airs on PBS Sunday, February 25 at 8:00, before Downton Abbey. (Show times may vary, please check local listings in your market). First, the semi-finalists are challenged with a Signature baklava. Next is a most demanding Technical task — making the tricky German schichttorte, cooked in stages under a grill to create 20 layers. Judges Paul Hollywood and Mary Berry check by counting the individual layers! The Showstopper raises the bar even higher: the final four work non-stop to create two elegant entremets.

- It’s a story nearly the whole world knows, with more than 2.2 billion people around the globe following the teachings and principles of Jesus of Nazareth. But the intimate historical details of his life and the political collusions that led to his brutal demise bring intriguing context to the familiar story. This spring, National Geographic Channel’s Killing Jesus, produced by Scott Free Productions and based on the New York Times best-selling book by Bill O’Reilly and Martin Dugard, dives deep inside the historical story of how Jesus’ message and preachings led to his persecution and execution by a group of conspirators who saw him as a threat to their power.
Killing Jesus, a three-hour television event, will premiere on Palm Sunday, March 29, at 8:00 on National Geographic Channel.

- Following the recent release of Big Music Universal Music Enterprises will release a four-disc digital box set of Simple Minds’ Sparkle in the Rain on March 31st. It will be the first time the entire back catalog of this era has been collected together. Originally released in February 1984, SSparkle in the Rain (title taken from a line in ‘Book Of Brilliant Things’) was Simple Minds’ sixth studio album and, following 1982’s crossover album New Gold Dream, the one to cement their commercial success.

- VH1’s series Barely Famous features sisters Erin and Sara Foster (multi-hyphenate producers, actresses and writers and daughters of Grammy Award-winning producer David Foster) offering a tongue-in-cheek perspective on reality TV and life in the Hollywood fast lane. In Barely Famous, Erin and Sara portray sisters who navigate the treacherous LA waters of career and dating, all while trying to maintain their picture perfect image. The series highlights the most obvious and outlandish conventions of reality TV by centering around two sisters who say they would never do a reality show, but are being filmed by a camera crew. The sisters are followed through their awkward celebrity encounters and efforts to book their next big gig and when things go horribly wrong - as they tend to do – the ladies prove that living the Hollywood lifestyle isn't easy, even if you're born into it. Take a peek at the Supertrailer here: http://www.vh1.com/video/play.jhtml?id=1734255

- “Lion whisperer” Kevin Richardson and some of the world’s leading wildlife biologists set up a series of remarkable experiments designed to unravel the mysteries of two apex predators and arch rivals in a new two-part series. Killer IQ: Lion vs. Hyena premieres March 4th and March 11th at 8:00 on Smithsonian Channel. Nicknamed the ‘lion whisperer’ by his global fans, Richardson has forged an incredibly close bond with these formidable carnivores – interacting with them as one of the group.

- Hulu has acquired the exclusive subscription video on demand (SVOD) rights to all previous seasons of CBS’s award-winning, critically acclaimed crime drama CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, it was announced today by Hulu CEO Mike Hopkins, and Scott Koondel, Chief Corporate Content Licensing Officer for CBS Corporation. All episodes will be available for streaming on Hulu with a Plus subscription beginning early April.

- truTV has ordered a pilot for Adam Ruins Everything (working title), a half-hour investigative comedy starring comedian Adam Conover, from Los Angeles-based production company Big Breakfast. In Adam Ruins Everything, Conover explores topics and ideas many people take for granted and dispels widespread misconceptions through a combination of comedy, history, and science. A perfect blend of comedy and enlightenment, Adam Ruins Everything is inviting, fast-paced and, above all, smart. Adam is like that friend who knows a little bit too much about everything and is going to tell you about it whether you like it or not. By employing sharp humor, mock experiments and on-the-spot comedy reporting, Adam Ruins Everything isn't just fun to watch, but addictively informative—it's everything you didn't want to need to know.

- Now Florida will know what it feels like to be hit by a Sharknado! The eagerly anticipated Syfy and The Asylum production Sharknado 3 will shoot key scenes at Universal Orlando Resort, it was announced today. Featuring stars Ian Ziering, Tara Reid and Cassie Scerbo, Sharknado 3 will premiere on Syfy in July, causing mass destruction in the nation’s capital, Washington, D.C., before roaring down the Eastern Seaboard and into Florida. Ziering and Reid will reprise their roles as Fin and April, respectively, while Cassie Scerbo will play Nova, her character from the original 2013 Sharknado movie.

- Rise and shine! Spring is coming and VH1 brings you a dose of raucous humor and supersize personalities to shake off those winter blues. It all starts as the network takes hangover humor on the road with Walk of Shame Shuttle, premiering Wednesday, March 18th at 9:00. In this all-new series, VH1 takes an uninhibited ride with hard-partying merrymakers rehashing the previous night’s escapades in the harsh daylight of the following morning. The following week, on Wednesday, March 25, 2015 at 8:00, tune in for the premiere of Hot GRITS a revealing look at the lives of seven girls looking to shake things up south of the Mason Dixon line.

- VH1 will commemorate the best-selling boy band of all time’s 20th anniversary with the VH1 Rock Doc Backstreet Boys: Show ’Em What You’re Made Of. The documentary will make its world television premiere on Friday, April 3rd at 9:00. The film was directed by Stephen Kijak (Stones in Exile, Scott Walker: 30 Century Man) and stars original group members Nick Carter, Howie Dorough, Brian Littrell, AJ McLean and Kevin Richardson, all of whom were producers on the film along with Mia Bays.

Previewing Cesar Millan: Viva Las Vegas! and Cesar 911

For about a decade, Cesar Millan has been coming into our homes to train our dogs. The reason he has stuck around so long on television is that not only is he a dog trainer, he is also a showman. So with that knowledge it should not be all that surprising to learn he now has his own stage show which he recently brought to the place all showmen dream to headline: Las Vegas. Of course he brought some cameras along for his new two hour special airing tonight Cesar Millan: Viva Las Vegas!

Sure he rehabilitates some dog in his show but it is really more of a comedy show with Cesar stalking around the stage like he is Chris Rock, but instead of jokes about race, these jokes are family, and dog friendly. The stop at the Palms Casino Resort was actually the only American stop on his world tour.

Next week Cesar leaves the stage behind and returns to his day job on Cesar 911 where family members, neighbors, and friends call on the dog whisperer to help their loved ones and their best friend. In the season premiere Cesar receives a call from someone who was bit by a neighborhood Great Dane and an expecting mother who fears her kid will be bitten by her sister’s dog because of the number of times the Maltese mix has bitten her.

Later this season, Cesar is called on to help someone who was banned from the weekly family barbecue three years ago because of his German Shepard, a duo that has already been kick out of one apartment complex because of their unruly dogs and is close to getting kicked out of their current one, an American bulldog that is driving his owners towards a divorce after he bit the family’s toddler.

Cesar Millan: Viva Las Vegas (watch a preview) premieres tonight at 9:00 on Nat Geo Wild. Cesar 911 (watch a preview) airs Fridays at 9:00 on Nat Geo Wild starting next week.

Previewing Vikings: Season Three

Conventional wisdom says that the cable model of only ten to fourteen episodes per season is better because it is easier to write that many good episodes then twenty-two in one year. That is clearly true but the one downfall is that instead of a three month break, you have to wait nine to ten months in between seasons. So you could have gotten impregnated of the night of the second season finale of Vikings and delivered your kids with time to spare before the third season started.

It seems that in between season, Ragnor has done some procreating of himself, though I am not entirely sure because I do not remember how big his brood was when the last season ended, it could very well be the same. But as the season starts it seems like all the men are having some lady problems as they wait to return to Essex to do some farming. One is going through a seven year itch, another has too many baby momma, another does not want to be tied down, while another in the clan who does want to be tied down but want to do so with someone who only wants to fight.

But do not worry, once Ragnor and his crew make it back to Wessex, they will not just be sitting around and farming their new land. If you may remember, there was a hot brunette last season who uncle and brother took the land that she thinks is rightfully hers and manages Ragnor to help her get it back. And o course there are plenty of people who will conspire against him that will Ragnor from his field and on the battlefield all season. And with the boys away, the girls play with a new mysterious man who turns out to be more than he seems.

Vikings airs Thursdays at 10:00 on History.

I Want My Movie Trailers

Pitch Perfect - May 15


The first domestic trailer did very good job to get excited for the sequel; the group doing the Cups song from the original, Anna Kendrick making fart noises. The Super Bowl spot gave up an a capella version of Before He Cheats and the Green Bay Packers covering Bootylicious. The latest trailer brings the funny (...because of World War II... boom). We got some new musical performances: Wrecking Ball.. yawn. But the Germans pick things up with an eerie snippet of Muse and a funny take on Bell Biv DeVoe. Then something that is giving me pause about the second movie happened: Rebel Wilson giving her take on the A Tribe Called Quest / Leaders of the New School classic collaboration. Hopefully that turns out better than the trailer would have me believe. I would be much more confident if Anna Kendrick had taken lead on that one after she crushed No Diggity in the first film. Maybe they are saving her for the epic Busta Rhymes part which is so great you have to spend money to see it, they just will not give away something that good during a free trailer.

Aloha - May 29


News broke last year that Cameron Crowe was filming a new movie in Hawaii with Emma Stone, Bill Murray, Rachel McAdams, and Danny McBride. Just the casting and with Crowe writing and directing I was almost ready to call it the greatest movie in the history of cinema. I probably would have if they cast Ryan Gosling instead of Bradly Cooper. Last week we finally a title (Aloha) and a trailer. It was not as great as I was hoping (though I cannot confirm nor deny I have already watched it over twenty-five) most it falling on me being disappointed that it stars Cooper instead of Gosling and Stone as an Air Force liaison (with that said if she were cast in a female reboot of Top Gun, I would start camping out at my local multiplex tomorrow). But of course there are some good times in the trailer: "You're gonna wear this like Flavor Flav wears a clock," the dude from The Office saying "a lot," the best Cold War Kids song in their catalogue, the scene with Emma covering her face with her hands (if I was a fourteen year old girl with a Tumblr I would gif the crap out of that, granted if I were a fourteen year old girl, I would probably be giffing Cooper rolling his eyes at Emma playing guitar instead; wait Emma Stone plays guitar in this movie? Why is this not out yet?); and most importantly the triumphant return of Rachael McAdams who has not been in a watchable movie since maybe Morning Glory five years ago.

Trainwreck - July 17


After popularizing the beta male bro comedy genre ten years ago, Judd Apatow seems to be trying to get the female version of the genre off the ground. He produced Bridesmaid and now the first film he has ever directed but not write looks to continue that beta female route with Trainwreck. The movie was instead written by star Amy Schumer. I am a little iffy about the trailer because I am one of the few Clevelanders still hates LeBron James. But hey, there is Brie Larson (if Amy is Seth Rogan, does that make Briw Paul Rudd?) And it seems clear LeBron is playing himself, does that mean John Cena does too? Either way I do not think I could lookm at him the same way ever again.

Hot Pursuit - May 8


When I heard Reese Witherspoon and Sofia Vergarra were in a trailer together for a female buddy comedy I though it was a fake one for Funny or Die. After seeing it and learning it is a real movie, I am still suspicious that it may really end up being fake. Maybe Reese was right to stop making comedies and should have continued to take serious roles.

I Want My Music Television: 2/17/15

Style - Taylor Swift


When you listen to Taylor Swift, her lyrics are so direct and to the point, you can see the music video play out in front of you, and when she finally puts her own visuals to her music, it is pretty much what you expect it to be as they are usually acted out versions of her lyrics. This is the first time that I can think of that Taylor went very abstract with her music video which look like something you would expect to have seem on 120 Minutes (well if she would have wore less stylish clothes and pick a less attractive co-star) instead of TRL.

Black Son - Death Cab for Cutie


Death Cab for Cutie announced their new album along with the departure of guitarist Chris Walla, usually credited with creating the sound of the band though he still contributed to most of the album. Their first song since comes off as a little more menacing than anything the band has done before. If Codes and Keys was about Ben Gibbard's dissolving marriage, is this another album of something breaking up? I am not optimistic it will be better just from the first single.

Pray to God - Calvin Harris featuring Haim`


I was a big fan of Haim's first album, but I really do not need a crappy EDM / Calvin Harris version of their music. Much like I was hoping (and got) an acoustic Aloe Blacc version of Wake Me Up, I do kind of want to hear Haim play this song by themselves. And maybe they can do it without the coven outfits and random animals.

Champagne Kisses - Jessie Ware


I wanted to like Jessie Ware's first album more than I actually did but her sophomore outing was a vast improvement (Say You Love Me cracked the top ten of my 100 Greatest Songs of 2014), the latest single is alright but the video is messing with my mind. I really want whatever that director was taking.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 2/15/15

2015 Grammy Awards: I had a feeling 2014 was not a very good year for music when I was making my best of the year list and watching this year's Grammy's verified that after seeing Sam Smith and Beck win the top four awards especially considering they were basically the best in very weak fields (well I would have given Haim the Best New Artist Award). But usually in weak musical years, the show can produce great once in a lifetime duets, but all of those fell flat. Really, a week later nothing really stands out to me this year except how boring it was.

The Walking Dead: Hold ghosts of Tyrese past! I have to admit I have enjoyed this season significantly more that the earlier ones, but why oh why had the show killed off its two most entertaining characters in back to back episodes yet Carl is still alive (thee third, Bob literally bit it earlier this season two).
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Pretty Little Liars: Oh Spencer, you are a moron. Did she really think that some college hired the dude to make a mural and to do it with spray paint at night? But I really could care less about these girls personal lives, just stick the the overly complex murder mystery of someone who probably is not even dead.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Mavel's Agent Carter: Whoa, they were actually able to catch Peggy, I was a assuming as soon as she went on the lamb she would stay there until she was able to clear her name. And even more shocking it was a kiss from a Russian spy that brought her down. But the most shocking was the Russian scientist ended up being in cahoots with the spy. All this intrige should make for an interesting final two episodes.
You can download Marvel's Agent Carter om iTunes.

Justified: Watching this episode and the previews for next week was a greatest hits of recurring characters past (Loretta McCreary! Dicky Bennett!! Constable Bob!!! Elmore Limehouse!!!!) and that pretty much sums it up because I think the rest are either dead or in jail. Jake Busy is already on the dead list after just one episode with yet another memorable death scene on the show. I laughed through the entire commercial break. But it was nice to see Loretta outsmart Dicky one more time, not that it very hard thing to do.
You can download Justified on iTunes.

The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II: It is time for the annual annoying "To Be Continued" episode. Usually this comes right before the final elimination challenge. So we have to wait a week to see who goes home. But this has been two straight sad challenges. Last week TJ had to admonish all the guys who were too scared to jump out the surfboard contraption challenge and this week half of the teams could not even finish at all and had to institute a mercy rule. Even more sad, Jonna's puzzle was extremely embarrassing (Zach was right to compared it to something a third grader put together which was his second best comment of the evening after his almost correct reference to Of Mice and Men) and Brittany somehow did worse than her.
You can download The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II on iTunes.

Hindsight: Of course the show eventually worked in the famous Say Anything boombox scene, but this definitely the first time anyone thought to use KWS as the soundtrack. And it only got better when the batteries ran out.
You can download Hindsight on iTunes.

The Americans: Yawn, another near miss by the FBI. At least there was that bizarre and random scene with Paige finding a picture of their neighbor in a bikini in her brother's room.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

Nashville: Of course his niece was not a match and his sister does not want to give hers (okay that was a bit of a serve, I just thought she would not be a match), it is beyond obvious that Deacon is going to have to get a new liver from his daughter. I wonder how long they will stretch this until he asks (or more likely she offers).
You can download Nashville on iTunes.

King of the Nerds: Whoa, Moby really takes his nerd culture seriously. But you have to side with him because it is really stupid for someone to pick a fight with a judge.
You can download King of the Nerds on iTunes.