“I’m sorry, you’re just a Tool” may never reach the pantheon of parting snarkiness of reality shows like “The tribe has spoken” but that certainly hasn’t stopped me from uttering the phrase ad nausea for the past two months. From Michael Phelps and Alex Rodriguez for their “young and stupid” excuses, to Rush Limbaugh and Rohm Emanuel arguing over who wants to get us out of economic mess less; there are no shortage of Tools out there.
With the overabundance of Tools around these days, VH1 (naturally) rounded up the nine biggest Tools in America who were stupid enough to think they were actually competing for the title of Mr. Awesome. But much like life, the joke was on them as their girlfriends had enrolled them in the Tool Academy to make them better people and boyfriends. But on the bright side, to get into this charm school they didn’t have to make out with Bret Michaels or Flavor Flav.
Nor did they have to be judged by one of the least classy person in America, or England for that matter in Sharon Osborne. Instead we get “relationship expert” Trina Dolenz, who may or may not be related to the dude from The Monkees. Granted she was just a pasty because like all of these “better one’s self” shows, the eliminations were arbitrary and inconsistent where most eliminations were not because they were the biggest Tool but they made for the least interesting television. Which is what kept Tommy and Shawn around to the final four when they should have been the first two out based on their actions.
The one misstep the show took was they each Tool their own moniker, such as Tiny Tool and Naked Too for the two finalists, but still had the host go by their own name, or silly self given pseudonym like Matsuflex and Celebrity, when they should have taken a page out of Flavor Flav’s notebook and continually call them by their Tool given name. Other than that, there were not any other flaws aside from the stupid girls who decided to stay with their Tools despite getting kicked out early (two of the nine decided to not break up with their expelled Tools despite stating the Tool Academy was the last stop). Although we will have to wait until next week at the reunion show to see if they kept their snap judgments.
In the end Josh was the lone Tool to graduate and got his very first diploma ever. And in a twist I would guest the other Tools were happy to avoid, the host said that their families were waiting to get married right there and then. Granted I debate the validity of the union because what self respecting minister would officiate a wedding on a show called Tool Academy? And he conspicuously didn’t mention who vested the authority of him to deem such a thing legal. But in the end IO hope they rush into production Tool Academy2 and if we are really lucky we may one day get a Celebrity edition featuring some of the earlier mentioned Tools. Or possibly a spin off realty show where Matuflex, his girl Jenna Fenton move in with her Deacon father.
Tool Academy: There was nothing more entertaining than to see Ashley give the verbal smackdown to Shawn. The guy remained to the end the biggest tool on the show so it was good to finally see him leave. And even though it was a bit toolish, Josh calling out Aida for being a hooker was classic. Really, he had two girl, but Shawn’s were two of the most unattractive on the show. Can’t wait for the reunion special. Oh, as fo a prediction of winner and who is getting married, Josh for both of them. You can download Tool Academy on iTunes.
The Big Bang Theory: It felt like we have already seen this show with Penny messing with Sheldon’s spot. And she didn’t even lose any points for disrupting it. And are we really supposed to believe Wolowitz has been with different girls? You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.
Chuck: Chuck is lucky that Sarah saved him from moving in with Morgan, that was a bad idea to end all bad ideas. Speaking of bad ideas to end all bad ideas, it was nice to see Brooklyn Decker on NBC after the network stupidly didn’t pick up her pilot Lipshitz Save the World. What moron thought that Kath & Kim was a better idea? Oh yeah, Ben Silverman. Thanks for depriving me of weekly installments of Brooklyn, you moron. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download Chuck on iTunes.
Lost: Just when you thought the show couldn’t get any more unbelievable: Sawyer gets domesticated. And did Horace have Amy’s husband killed? He has a truce with The Others, and Richard is pretty mad that two of his men were killed but in defense, Horace never mentioned they killed the husband first, then Horace promptly marries her. And shouldn’t little Ben be wondering around somewhere at this time? And why hasn’t Jin and Sawyer found Rose and Bernard when searching the island for Locke?
And I think I figured out why Locke and Ben didn’t flash with the Oceanic Six (assuming that Sun and Sayid did, and by the previews, he definitely did). We already know The Others aren’t doing the time warp so that is why Ben isn’t, and by turning the frozen donkey wheel, Locke got his Others inducted card. Of course I cannot account for Lapidus or Charlotte’s corpse, who will end up being the chick people saw leave with Lapidus. You can stream current episodes over at ABC.com.
Survivor: Thankfully the Token Hot Chick got saved from getting voted off. They seem to be dropping early from recent Survivors. Hopefully she can at least make it to the jury. And I wonder if the secret alliance is going to crumble before it ever gets started. Taj looks like she is going to crack and the dude forgot to talk to Sierra. Hopefully they can make it to flip the game on its head and that Coach is their first casualty. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube.
My Name Is Earl: Holy Booger Sighting! And really the show is much better when it is about Earl and his list. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download My Name Is Earl on iTunes.
Friday Night Lights: Darn you Friday Night Lights, yet another emotional exit this week. It was hard not to yell at the screen hoping that would help Jason get a job. Hopefully with his exit, they at least find a way to work Herc into more storylines. Maybe the Riggins and him can flip more house. Or maybe he can turn out to be Jacob on Lost (it took me to recognize him up and dancing). You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com.
Quote of the Week: You’re like the poster child for friendly fire. (Casey - Chuck)
Song of the Week: Africa – Toto (as performed by Jeffster; Chuck)
Big News of the Week: NBC May Bring Back I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here!: It may just be a coincidence, but interestingly enough word leaked a day after I posted my interview with John Lehr about his tenure hosting I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! that NBC is considering resurrecting the show for the summer. Maybe NBC agreed with me that the show was before its time. And hopefully the network agrees with Lehr that the show shouldn’t be taken as serious an d let the host mock the contestants. Hopefully the show doesn’t become too successful because we may end up with weekdays of the Jay Leno 10:00 hour preceded by Celebrity at 9:00 next with only 8:00 for scripted shows on the Peacock. Check out our full discussion of Lehr’s involvement in the show:
Coalition Links of the Week: Does Nick "Normund Gentle" Mitchell deserve another chance at the American Idol crown? (BuzzSugar)
Vance loved the season finales for Privileged and Leverage. While Leverage has been picked up for Season 2, here's hoping Privileged returns too. (Tapeworthy)
This week, Jace was thrilled by Lost and Damages but also admitted his secret love for animated series like Batman: The Brave and the Bold and Wolverine and the X-Men. (Televisionary)
What's a hipster to do? Marisa pre-emptively fought back against those who would ridicule her devotion to American Idol. (TiFaux)
After watching the Grey’s Anatomy-Private Practice crossover, Jennifer came to one conclusion: Addison Montgomery needs to go back to Seattle Grace. STAT. (Tube Talk)
Raoul talked to Charlie from Hell's Kitchen about making sauce, hitting the sauce and everything Ramsay. (TV Filter)
Free Download of the Week: Barenaked Ladies (Amazon MP3): Amazon is offering up five free songs from those quirky Canadians but keep in mind the songs all come from the Ladies’ children’s album. Some Fantastic I Can Sing Off The Hook Maybe Not In The Car
Video of the Week: In a story I broke a couple months ago, Ben Silverman is batting .000 over at NBC (see: Your New Most Inept Executive Is…) but he may of actually found something watchable to put on his network that may get him close to the Mendoza Line in Kings. Being a history buff (the story is a reimagining of David and Goliath) the show looks epic and appropriately enough premieres on the Ides of March at 8:00 (that is the 15th for those not up on your Shakespearian plays). Here’s a clip:
Next Week Pick of the Week: Tool Academy, Sunday (March 8) at 10:00 on VH1: It has been a fun ride so far and the final three of Matuflex, Shaun and mini tool will get cut down to two for the Tool Academy finale on next week. And if NBC is reading the 9th Green, hopefully VH1 was poking around when I suggested Celebrity Tool Academy featuring Ashton Kutcher, Terrell Owens, Sean Hannity, Pete Wentz, Spencer Pratt, Al Gore, Sean Avery, Donald Trump, and Alex Rodriquez.
Tool Academy: VH1 has some weird scheduling. No Tool Academy or Rock of Love Bus tonight because of the Academy Awards yet Confessions of a Teen Idol is a go. Versus the Super Bowl No Bret Michaels but the Tools and Teens were new. Yet there were no repeats against the Grammy’s, the biggest night in music for a once music channel. It is odd to think that airing against the Academy Awards would bite into their viewers but I bet repeating an episode twenty times in a week hurts more than any special programming it goes against. In other VH1 news, Ricki Lake has been tapped to be the head master of the next Charm School featuring rejects from Rock of Love Bus and Real Chance of Love. I cannot wait. You can also download Tool Academy on iTunes.
Chuck: Just what is chuck’s brain made of that he can store all these Intercets in it? Bryce uploaded two (although the second time seemed to get dropped from the storyline because it hasn’t been mention since as to why and what was uploaded) and now he has FULCRUM’s up there too. Hopefully this eliminates the silly plot points where he doesn’t flash on FULCRUM agents on sight even though they are in the Intercet. You can also download Chuck on iTunes.
Trust Me: The Sarah storyline this week really encapsulate why the show isn’t picking up steam, the writing is really subject. I have no clue is she actually realized she is now a lesbian, was she joking, was she just trying to talk herself out of hooking up with the dude? I have no clue. And they really need to work the daughter into the show more because she was the only redeeming quality of this past episode. You can also download Trust Me on iTunes.
Gary Unmarried: Is Jamie King even on this show anymore? I cannot even remember the last episode she was in.
Lost: There are very few things I hate more on television than those silly “Thirty-Six Hours Eariler” beginnings. What the text should read is “The First Act Is Boring So We Are Going to Start in the Third Act in Hopes That You Don’t Fall Asleep or Turn off the TV. Plus We get to Write Less Because We Will Just Show the First Couple Minutes of the Episode When We Get to it in the Story. Oh, and Spoiler Alert: Kate and Hurley Will End Up on the Plane.”
Maybe this was to distract from the gaping plot holes like if the conditions had to be as close to original crash then 1) why were they flying West, not East 2) why did they all get to sit in first class? 3) and most important, where the frak was Walt? And about the “crash” how did they warp to the time Jin was stuck in and how did they warp to the ground? They can either crash and warp or warp and plummet to their deaths; you don’t just warp to the ground safely.
As for some predictions: Kate gave Aaron to Sawyer’s baby mama; Charlie was the one who told Hurley about the plane (which is also why he had the guitar); Jin, Myles and Faraday have been living amongst the Dharma Initiative for the past three years (although Sawyer and possibly Juliet have not unless he has been bribed with enough Dharma Beer); Ben had Syiad extradited to Guam; the people in Coach did not warp in time and are the people that shoot at Sawyer at. el. when they stole their pontoon; Ben killed (or at least attempted to kill) Penny. You can stream current episodes over at ABC.com.
Friday Night Lights: I was waiting for Rigging to get a hold of JD. And his tour of Dillon certainly disappoint. But nothing this episode beat Billy staple gunning his hand to the wall. And I cannot believe Tyra was that stupid to believe the cowboy. And thanks to the Promo Monkeys who spoiled what was coming up with their relationship, it looks like she shouldn’t have. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com.
Quote of the Week: He’s Korean, I’m from Encino. (Miles, Lost)
Song of the Week: Under the Bridge - Red Hot Chili Peppers (as sung by Raj, The Big Bang Theory)
Big News of the Week: I’m Sorry Alex Rodriquez, You’re Just a Tool: I’m not sure what was less surprising, that Michael Phelps got caught with his lips halfway down a bong pipe or that A-Roid failed a drug test. Which begs the question, what will opposing fans taunt A-Roid more about next year: his steroid abuse or hooking up with Madonna. Or option C that A-Roid will get caught up in something else will come up between now and opening day.
Coalition Links of the Week: Buzz threw caution (and logic) to the wind and made her picks for this year's American Idol top 12. (BuzzSugar)
The smile and blond hair have a lot to do with it, but Vance still defends The Mentalist (with Simon Baker) is way more fun to watch than a procedural has any right to be. (Tapeworthy)
This week, Jace reviewed the first few episodes of Joss Whedon's new FOX drama Dollhouse, starring Eliza Dushku. (Televisionary)
Yeesh! Not even a decent Weekend Update could save a pretty dismal Bradley Cooper-hosted Saturday Night Live. (TiFaux)
Kate and Raoul rounded up all of their remaining questions about Battlestar Galactica. (TV Filter)
Tool Academy: It is pretty clear that Tommy should win because he was the only one who opted out of getting the Tool Academy tattoo. And not only did the other Tools got the tattoo but they got a huge version of the crest of it. That alone should disqualify them. And after this episode it is clear that they need to do a female version of the show. Although I am not sure what they can call it because all the common derogatory terms for females won’t get past the censors. You can also download Tool Academy on iTunes.
The Big Bang Theory: Leonard’s mom being a female version of Sheldon was cheesy, cliché formulaic and fracking hilarious. Her calling out Raj and Howard’s homosexual relationship may have been the funniest thing the show has ever done. The look on Howard’s face was priceless. Then Leonard made possible the dumbest mistake since Chris Webber trying to call a time-out. Just shut up and head for home. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.
Trust Me: The whole Conner going after a pregnant ex-girlfriend really struck me the wrong way like the writers were purposefully trying to destroy the character before the show could get off the ground. Really quite disturbing. You can also download Trust Me on iTunes.
Lost: I have this sinking sensation that soon we will be dealing with three separate time period: the people still on the island circa 2006 (or wherever they may be), the Oceanic Six circa today, and Locke circa wherever he may have been warped to via the frozen donkey wheel. Of which supposable stopped the time warp according to Jack’s dad. As annoying as the multiple warping per episode I’ll be disappointed because there are still plenty of unanswered questions I thought we would get during all the flashes.
Freshest in my mind is there are still holes in the Rousseau backstory. Like we learned that she wasn’t in fact crazy and killed her team for no reason but what exactly infected her team and why did she survive? Or how did she go from having a French accent to a strong Serbian one?
We also can deduce a few things like that Locke will come back to life because he still has to tell non aging dude where, and when, to find him after being shot by Ethan. We may also be able to assume that when Locke un-jammed the Donkey Wheel that the people still on the island won’t get warped back to 2006 but will be stuck in whatever time they last were. And considering Faraday has to tell Charlotte not to come back to the island and he starts working for Dharma, as seen in the premiere, that they are suck in the sixties somewhere.
As for the Oceanic Six, we get the most anti-climatic reveal of the show that Faraday’s mother is the person working with Not-Henry. And not a peep from Desmond who saw her in his flashback/mind warp thing. And then after making a big deal about everyone going back for two seasons, she just like oh well when just three of them show up. Although I wonder if Not-Henry knows about Penny and Desmond and deduce that she is in the vicinity to kill. You can stream current episodes over at ABC.com.
Friday Night Lights: I’m not sure what was the best part of the episode, Landry listening to Skid Row, Riggins repeating Buddy’s mantra to everyone, or Herc defense as to why it is okay to have pornography around babies. Oh have I missed Herc. They really need to work him into the show more. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com.
Free Download of the Week: Money (feat. David Byrne, Chuck D, Ras Congo, Seu Jorge & Z-Trip) - N.A.S.A. (Amazon MP3): Yes you read that correctly, Chuck D and David Byrne on the same track. And the song is as weird and awesome as you would expect it would be. And for you dudes out there without any Valentines you can rest in the solace that the The 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Show is currently free on Amazon Video on Demand. For those that do, Amazon MP3 is offering up Let’s Get it On by Marvin Gaye for free today only (see banner below).
Next Week Pick of the Week: Leverage, Tuesday at 10:00 on TNT: Gotta love the promo for the show that hypes “Either Nate gets his vengeance or his friends go to jail for the rest of their lives.” I am going out on the limb and predict that the latter won’t be happening. But anyways. Tuesday starts off a two part season finale of what turned out to be the best new show of 2007. Then if in time for the second part on February 24, TNT is running an all day marathon airing the previous 12 episodes beginning at 10:00 A.M.
Tool Academy: Thanks to the promo monkey who basically gave away who go kicked off this week as it became pretty apparent that M.E.G.A.’s girlfriend would turn out to be the Tool that gets her boy kicked off this wee. You can also download Tool Academy on iTunes.
Chuck: Yeah that 3-D stuff sucked. When I watch something in 3-D, I want object to feel like they are an inch from my nose not look like they just come an inch out of the television. And except for the flying knife during the elevator screen, there really wasn’t much that was 3-D worth. And they really glossed over Chuck being disturbed that he saw the Token Hot Chick killed someone. That was supposed to be the big cliffhanger and she was able to explain her way out of it in less than a minute. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download Chuck on iTunes.
How I Met Your Mother: So was the theme of this episodes was that I should delete that I am an award winning actor and a Safety Town volunteer off my résumé? You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.
Trust Me: Do Thumbthing seems like the tag line equivalent of a Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip sketch to the point I spent most of the episode thinking, they are doing everything they can to keep Do Thumbthing? And Ed made my point to the focus group because as someone who grew up with a speech impediment (or three) who had to be pulled out of elementary classes two times a week for a half hour, I found it a bit offensive. You can also download Leverage on iTunes.
Lost: Now that was a huge shocker: Rousseau was actually quite attractive in her youth. But anyways. It was odd that Sawyer would call the Polynesian Boat people Other Others because I thought Faraday and his ilk were the Other Others. I originally thought that it may be the Oceanic 6, but they don’t really need two boats, but it seems obvious that that time is somewhere in the future. So I’ll go with my old standby when I don’t know and predict that it is Whitmore people. Speaking of time travel, they should really limit themselves to one flash per episode like in the perennial time travel show of all time Quantum Leap. You can stream current episodes over at ABC.com.
Friday Night Lights: What a bunch of heart wrenching scenes between Tyra telling Landry she chooses the rodeo dude and Matt telling off his mother. But at least they followed those up with the scene at Texas A&M (which Jo apparently thinks is a great school or something, I mean, it is no Kent State or anything) between Coach, Smash and the A&M coach which will go down in the anneals as on of the best Friday Night Lights scene ever. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com.
Big News of the Week: Michael Phelps, I’m Sorry, But You’re Just a Tool: Naturally whenever you make list, right after you publish it you think of a couple thing you forgot. Like last week when I gave my dream Celebrity Tool Academy list but forgot to include Michael Phelps. And that would be a deserved spot even before his most recent picture came out, but being dumb enough to put your lips half way down at a house party with dozens of co-eds with camera phones.
Gratuitous Token Hot Chick Picture of the Week (in 3-D!):
Coalition Links of the Week: Buzz wondered what's been driving viewers away from Ugly Betty this year. (BuzzSugar)
Now that the spoilers are out, Vance handicaps the alleged Top 36 American Idols and needs help making his picks for an Idol pool! (Tapeworthy)
This week, Jace landed quite a few scoops, celebrated Televisionary's third birthday, and marveled at the latest installment of HBO's deliciously taut polygamist drama Big Love. (Televisionary)
Scrubs has its faults, we all know this, but Jesse decided that people should give it a little more credit than it gets. (TiFaux)
Free Download of the Week: Sonny with a Chance (iTunes): Here is one for the kiddies. My sources tell me that Demi Lovato is huge in the underage crowd.
Video of the Week: No specific date set yet, but Rescue Me returns sometime in April. But since there hasn’t been a new episode since August 2007, I guess another two months won’t hurt. Maybe I can finally get around to watching the minisodes while I am waiting. Here is a promo:
Video Has Been Removed Due to Terms of Agreement with FX
Next Week Pick of the Week: Survivor: Torantins - The Brazilian Highlands, Thursday at 8:00 on CBS: The last time, and only other time, Survivor hit Brazil was the first time the show spilt up tribes by gender. But the show is moving out of the Amazon and to the Highlands. And please excuses me if I get weak in the knees if Tamera “Taj” Johnson-George takes it downtown to a win because it is only human nature because she is always on my mind. Although I may have root for my former Miss Ohio Candice Smith. Fun Fact: her predecessor, Kim Mullen, was in the Palau cast.
Quote of the Week: Now, let me be your mother. That is my job. (Mama Smash - Friday Night Lights)
Song of the Week: Freedom ’90 - George Michael (Trust Me)
Big News of the Week: Networks Party Like it’s 1989: Since Bionic Woman, Knight Rider, 90210 remakes bombed miserably (I have a feeling we will be able to add Cupid to that list soon enough), all the networks are going to try it again this time by recreating the short lived movie to television show Parenthood (NBC), The Witches of Eastwick (ABC), DC Comic turned failed ABC show Human Target (FOX), and Americanized version of Absolutely Fabulous (FOX), and the two times mini-series turned failed series V (ABC) which gave us the first lizard/human baby ever. And for those that cannot get enough of the 80’s there is Lost in the 80’s from ABC set in the time period. CBS, I assume, will just recycle CSI with another different name. Wake me up when they get around to remaking Sledge Hammer!
Coalition Links of the Week: With tons of pilots in the works for next Fall, Buzz wondered if you could tell the real ones from the fakes. (BuzzSugar)
Vance discusses Degrassi:TNG, Lie To Me, Bones, Scrubs and Lost this week. (Tapeworthy)
This week, Jace took an early look at next week's episode of NBC's Chuck, presented in box-busting 3D. (Televisionary)
Who's the next to die on Battlestar Galactica? Dan made a graph to help try to figure it out. (TiFaux)
This week, the TV Addicted posted our exclusive interview with Buffy, Angel, and Dollhouse mastermind Joss Whedon. (The TV Addict)
Tool Academy: Note to self: if you ever run in to Cameron, never, under any circumstance piss her off. And is it too soon to cast the (hopefully) inevitable Celebrity Edition of Tool Academy? If not, here are my suggestions: Ashton Kutcher, Terrell Owens, Sean Hannity, Pete Wentz, Spencer Pratt, Al Gore, Sean Avery, Donald Trump, and the dude you’re getting a Dell guy. I would have also suggested Ryan Seacrest but the show involves having a girlfriend, so he may have to wait until Beard Academy. You can also download Tool Academy on iTunes.
Leverage: An interesting Whedon-verse reunion Lindsay and the father/son tandem of Jonathan and Holland even without any wink-wink connection to their pasts. But when did Nathan become a raging alcoholic to the point random cops knew this? You can also download Leverage on iTunes.
Lost: Let me be the last person to predict that Faraday’s mother is the old chick last seen talking to Not-Henry and only other time seen in Desmond’s dream/flashback/mind trip. There in lies one of many problems with the show is they build up these big reveals that everyone sees coming, and then pays I off a couple episodes too late. Hopefully I am wrong and it turns out that it is really Jack mom.
As for the twist I don’t think anyone saw coming, we got a double dose of Charles Whitmore. And in true Lost fashion, that is all we got, a glance, no explanation of how he become an Other, why he had a falling out with them or how he got off the island. I have a bad feeling that Whitmore is going to turn out to be Biff Tannen who became rich thanks to knowing what happens in the future. But does that make Not-Henry Marty McFly? You can stream current episodes over at ABC.com.
Friday Night Lights: Poor Matt Saresen, if only they had instant replay, they could see he clearly had possession when the ball crossed the plane, and that is all you need no matter if it gets loose (assuming that Texas football has they same rule as the pros, college, and intramural flag football). And nice swerve by the promo monkeys that made it looked like the Riggins Boys get caught. And if Mama Smash is looking for some extra income, I wonder if the Taylor’s could use a nanny for baby Grace. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com.
Deal of the Week: Take 10% off all Battlestar Galactica: Visit SCIFI.com and click on the shop tab. Then use Coupon code: "BSGFAN". Excludes QMx items and Cylons.
Video of the Week: The second episode of Trust Me is a little stronger than the first even though it gets into Studio 60 skit territory where you wonder why they are so behind their tagline. But anyways. Here is a clip for the upcoming episode (and be sure to check out my Preview of Trust Me):
Next Week Pick of the Week: I Love Money 2, Monday at 9:00 on VH1: This should go to Chuck and its special 3-D episode on the same day but an hour earlier, but I am bitter because of all the trouble I am having locating the special 3-D glasses. This is mostly because they don’t have them at my local grocery story and haven’t looked for them anywhere else yet.
Quote of the Week: I’m merely exercising my 1st Amendment right. And the 1st Amendment states very clearly you can rip anything off as long as you change it slightly. (Leslie Poole - 10 Items or Less)
Big News of the Week: Veronica Mars: The Movie: Apparently Rob Thomas took my advise to finish off the Veronica Mars movie script right after the amount of Cupid episodes got slashed and now has Joel Silver and Kristen Bell attached as producer and star. One thing that wasn’t announced this week was the most important thing needed when making a movie: a studio. So color me cautiously optimistic until someone puts up some money to get the movie made.
Coalition Links of the Week: Buzz wrapped up her stay at TCA by offering up some awards for the best, worst, and most awkward moments from her time in LA. (BuzzSugar)
Sandie thinks Legend of the Seeker is the Best Show You're Not Watching. (Daemon's TV)
Vance shows some love for Privileged and Lost. (Tapeworthy)
This week, Jace took an early look at the third episode of Season Five of Lost (Jughead) and hinted at some surprising twists to come! (Televisionary)
In this week's Gossip Girl recap, Sara draws some comparisons to Saved By The Bell and 90210. (TiFaux)
This week, the TV Addict revealed why we digg Jimmy Fallon. (The TV Addict)
Tool Academy: Yeah, this show is totally staged. I’m supposed to believe that the couple that has never been intimate just so happen to win the conjugal visit reward. And I am beginning to think this is a Joe Schmo (remember the show starring Kristen Wiig) situation where the cast are paid actors but us, the audience, are the Schmos. The only thing from me thinking it is completely scripted is these stupid women; all saying the show is their last chance, choose to stay with their Tools after being voted out. I may have to put the Over/Under at 1 of chicks that actually dump their Tool on the show. You can also download Tool Academy on iTunes.
The Big Bang Theory: It may not be a good sign that I was mentally editing Sheldon’s flow chart before Howard did. I may have to stop watching this show, not for quality reasons, but to keep me from getting any more ideas. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.
How I Met Your Mother: This show is at its worst when they think they are clever and this is the worst case to date with their time shifting. With that said, I must admit the word, “We should buy a bar” have crossed my lips before. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.
Gary Unmarried: How can you have a discussion about not legally mentioning the attractiveness of a fifteen year old and not make a Chris Hanson reference? I was sitting there all episodes waiting for one and it never came. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube.
Friday Night Lights: Nothing made me laugh harder this week is when Riggins stood up when Lyla arrived without his pants on. I laugh because I am the same way about getting out of good clothes as fast as possible, sometimes starting when I am in my car. And for any fan of the show, you really need to check out The B.S. Report with Bill Simmons who recently interviewed show creator Peter Berg for about an hour where you learn such gems like who Berg wanted to be the coach over Kyle Chandler and which Survivor he once dated. You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com.
Video of the Week: For your entertainment (or at the very least mine) the greatest Jeopardy question answer ever in the history of the world:
Next Week Pick of the Week: Super Bowl XLIII, Sunday (2/1)at 7:00 on NBC: For the second straight year, one of my least favorite teams is a heavy favorite. Hopefully for the second straight year the underdog comes out on top. And if it turns out to be a blow out, there’s always a new episode of Tool Academy at 10:00 and even a commercial in 3-D this year. Hold onto those glasses because the next day, Chuck is back with an episode in 3-D. Now I just need to hunt down some glasses because the Token Hot Chick in an extra dimension is something that should not be missed.
Big News of the Week: Class of 2009 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Inductees Announced: Run-DMC, Metallica, Bobby Womack, Jeff Beck (who gets in for the second time, the first as a member of the Yardbirds seventeen years ago), and Little Anthony and the Imperials all get in this year. This year’s ceremony should be extra special for Womack because for the first time in twelve years, the induction will actually be held in his hometown of Cleveland where the Hall is located. Of course I am within driving distance to the ceremony so if anyone has an extra ticket or press pass, shout me a holla. I have the date cleared on my calendar.
Also going in this year are Rockabilly queen Wanda Jackson who is being inducted as an early influence as well as three sidemen: Elvis Presley’s bassist Bill Black and his drummer D.J. Fontana, as well as Dewey Lyndon “Spooner” Oldham, who has played piano with everyone from Neil Young to Aretha Franklin to the Drive-By Truckers.
Coalition Links of the Week: From the Gossip Girl spinoff to Chuck's dad to the rise of Adrianna on 90210, Buzz scooped up some news at the TCA press tour. (BuzzSugar)
Sandie watched for the first time and fell in love with The Biggest Loser. (Daemon's TV)
Despite some flaws and some overly Diablo Cody-speak, Vance really enjoyed Toni Collette's new show The United States of Tara and can attest that the episodes get better from there. (Tapeworthy)
This week, Jace posted an advance review of Season Three of Skins and interviewed series co-creator Jamie Brittain. (Televisionary)
Marisa had long since given up on The Real World, too, but the show's new setting of Brooklyn lured her back. This week she compares the MTV BK with the real thing. (TiFaux)
Heather got to sit on a darkened screening room and watch the first two episodes of the fifth season of Lost and mighty fine she says they were, too... (TV Spy)
Confessions of a Teen Idol: Sadly Time Warner still hasn’t dumped VH1 so I was stuck watching the second episode (but that wasn’t the worst, check the next item for that). I am just glad that the guy whose name I can’t remember called out the stylist for wearing that hideous green shirt. And how does having Marilyn Manson and P!nk on your résumé make you a credible stylist? You can also download Confessions of a Teen Idol on iTunes.
Tool Academy: Just when you think no one could limbo under the bar Ryan Seacrest set with Momma’s Boys, somehow VH1 slithers under that bar for the lowest reality show of the year. With that said, I enjoyed every minute of it. And they couldn’t have done better job casting the Tools. The fashion show where the Tools thought they were competing for Mr. Awesome was the highest of high comedy. The only drawback, much like the Charm School series, is the show is completely rigged where the more interesting people get to stay even if they are much bigger Tools. There is no reason the chair throwing Tool should not have gotten booted for that. As for a prediction, I may have to go with Matsuflex because he seems to be only one that is self aware that he is a humongous Tool. And his girlfriend is definitely the hottest out of all of them. You can also download Tool Academy on iTunes.
The Big Bang Theory: Yeah, that was enough Walowitz-centric episode for, like ever. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.
How I Met Your Mother: Is it really that hard to think of stuffing the magazine in your pocket like I always do? Of course the only problem I run into is a bathroom in the break room and I tend to come out to a dull house that all wonder what I was doing for half an hour. But when you have yet to read about Obama getting elected, you have to get some extra reading in sometime. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.
Leverage: Is it every episode where someone says, “This isn’t a typical job we do.” It is only six episodes in, they don’t have a typical job yet, let alone one ever week. Still an enjoyable episode. And they lucked out with next week’s ripped from the headlines story even though the episode was filmed months ago as the gang gets on a plane that may have to make an emergency landing complete with Sheldon’s last girlfriend, Sara Rue, as someone who isn’t very good a flying. You can also download Leverage on iTunes.
Gary Unmarried: There was really nothing more predictable that the art teacher to actually turn out to be hot because she really had a Rachel Lee Cooke in She’s All That quality to her where you’d still hook up with the ugly version. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube.
Free Download of the Week: The Fear - Lily Allen (iHeartMusic.com): It is a little cumbersome to get: you have to give them your e-mail to which they will send a link to for you to download; but it is a great song and in MP3 format so it is worth the extra minute out of your day to get.
Deal of the Week: Buy Two ABC Family DVDs and Save $10 Buy any two of these ABC Family DVD’s: Greek Chapter Two, Kyle XY Season Two, or The Secret Life of the American Teenager, and save $10 on your total purchase.
Video (Game) of the Week: Instead of the usual video this week, here is a game you can play. Based on last night's episode of The Office, The Duel, where you can choose to play as either Dwight or Andy, choose various weapons of attack and defense, and see what the outcome is! There are tons of scenarios so be sure to try them all!
Next Week Pick of the Week: Lost, Wednesday at 9:00 on ABC: I always find the fandom around Lost puzzling, its like people latch onto things they don’t understand in the hopes to not look dumb or out of the loop. I personally resigned myself not to be hugely let down by the inevitable end that I stopped really caring somewhere during third season and just went along for the mind numbing plots: mental time travel, sure, moveable islands, why not, frozen donkey wheels, why not. I’m not sure what is in store from the penultimate season (see what you learn by watching Gary Unmarried), but I’m sure it will result with a bunch of fanfare by people that have no clue what is going on but want people to think they do. And if you cannot get enough Lost, tune in at 8:00 that night for a recap hour where they will most likely forget Shannon, Boone, Nikki, Paulo and the Tailies ever existed.
“I’m sorry, you’re just a Tool” may never reach the pantheon of parting snarkiness of reality shows like “The tribe has spoken” but that certainly hasn’t stopped me from uttering the phrase ad nausea for the past two months. From Michael Phelps and Alex Rodriguez for their “young and stupid” excuses, to Rush Limbaugh and Rohm Emanuel arguing over who wants to get us out of economic mess less; there are no shortage of Tools out there.
Nor did they have to be judged by one of the least classy person in America, or England for that matter in Sharon Osborne. Instead we get “relationship expert” Trina Dolenz, who may or may not be related to the dude from The Monkees. Granted she was just a pasty because like all of these “better one’s self” shows, the eliminations were arbitrary and inconsistent where most eliminations were not because they were the biggest Tool but they made for the least interesting television. Which is what kept Tommy and Shawn around to the final four when they should have been the first two out based on their actions.
In the end Josh was the lone Tool to graduate and got his very first diploma ever. And in a twist I would guest the other Tools were happy to avoid, the host said that their families were waiting to get married right there and then. Granted I debate the validity of the union because what self respecting minister would officiate a wedding on a show called Tool Academy? And he conspicuously didn’t mention who vested the authority of him to deem such a thing legal. But in the end IO hope they rush into production Tool Academy2 and if we are really lucky we may one day get a Celebrity edition featuring some of the earlier mentioned Tools. Or possibly a spin off realty show where Matuflex, his girl Jenna Fenton move in with her Deacon father.![Terror Alert Level: High [ORANGE]](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhebDZ0qqwOVKMZj7oFSUe8Hm3ax54U9Hp1fThJPgiddTyzcdwx_5SV6E3b7hkKyxbaDiym4COmUXT2YJnsKCUjBHI_a2xZtNoY7qFQRslP5AGO5gLkJwn2ZbO0wIF80ycbKrgPPA/s400/small_high.png)
on my Terror Alert Scale.
(Pushing Daises, Smallville, Batman)
- N.A.S.A. (Amazon MP3): Yes you read that correctly, Chuck D and David Byrne on the same track. And the song is as weird and awesome as you would expect it would be. And for you dudes out there without any Valentines you can rest in the solace that the 
is currently free on Amazon Video on Demand. For those that do, Amazon MP3 is offering up Let’s Get it On by Marvin Gaye for free today only (see banner below).
