Lryics Quiz - 80's Dance Party

This month’s lyrics quiz is culminated from a set of CD’s I’ve made entitled 80’s Dance Party. So this month’s songs are from vol. 1 and part of vol. 2. I’m currently up to 7 vol. (With many more on the way), so there is a good possibility of more 80’s dance themes in upcoming months. The rules are as followed; in the comments section leave the name and artist with the corresponding number. If you are correct, I will unbold the song and give you credit. The person who guesses the most lyrics will be added to the list of winners on my sidebar. Also, in the case of cover songs or songs that have since been covered, I will only accept the 80’s artist who did it as correct. On to the lyrics.

1. So when U call up that shrink in Beverly Hill, U know one Dr. Everything’s Gonna Be All Right. (Let's Go Crazy - Prince - guessed by Meli)
2. I see you under the midnight, all shackles and bows. (Magic - The Cars - guessed by Guppyman)
3. Buying bread from a man in Brussels. He was six foot four and full of muscles. (Down Under - Men at Work guessed by Luka)
4. Made a meal out of me and came back for more. (You Shook Me All Night Long - AC/DC - guessed by Cap'n Platy)
5. With you in that dress my thoughts I confess verge on dirty. (Come on Eileen - Dexy's Midnight Runners - guessed by Mikeness)
6. Go to work in some high rise and vacation down at the Gulf of Mexico. (Pink Houses - John Mellencamp - guessed by Ruby)
7. That’s when she started talking about love, started talking about sin. (Keep Your Hands to Yourself - Georgia Satellites - guessed by Cap'n Platy)
8. The road behind was rocky, now you’re getting cocky. (Brake My Stride - Matthew Wilder - guessed by Melissa's in Progress)
9. Hush my darling, don’t you cry. Quiet, angel, forget their lies. (Our Lips Are Sealed - The Go-Go's - guessed by Pure Mood)
10. Easy operator come a knockin' on my door. (Pour Some Sugar on Me - Def Leppard - guessed by Cap'n Platy)
11. Come on baby won’t you show some class, why you want to move so fast? (We Don't Have to Take Our Cloths Off - Jermaine Stewart - guessed by Guppyman)
12. Take my tears and that’s not nearly all. (Tainted Love - Soft Cell - guessed by Ruby)
13. Your teacher preaches class like you're some kind of jerk. (Fight For Your Right (To Party) - Beastie Boys - guessed by Cap'n Platy)
14. I tried my imagination, but I was disturbed. (867-5309/Jenny - Tommy Tutone - guessed by Pure Mood)
15. Risin' up, straight to the top, had the guts, got the glory. (Eye of the Tiger - Survivor - guessed by Jessica)
16. The night is young and so am I. (Safety Dance - Men Without Hats - guessed by Melissa's in Progress)
17. I'm on the hunt I'm after you. (Hungy Like the Wolf - Duran Duran - guessed by Cap'n Platy)
18. It’s a big enough umbrella but it’s always me that ends up getting wet. (Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic - The Police - guessed by Pure Mood)
19. In the wink of a young girl’s eye. (Glory Days - Bruce Springsteen - guessed by Pure Mood)
20. She was pure like snowflakes no one could ever stain. (Centerfold - J. Geils Band - guessed by Guppyman)
21. When she shines she really shows you all she can. (Rio - Duran Duran - guessed by Luka)
22. If you say run, I’ll run with you. (Let's Dance - David Bowie - guessed by Jessica)
23. She had a pocket full of horses, Trojan and some of them used. (Little Red Corvette - Prince - guessed by Meli)
24. The oil down the desert way has been shakin’ to the top. (Rock the Casbah - The Clash - guessed by Guppyman)
25. When you looked at me I should've run, but I thought it was just for fun. (Vacation - The Go-Go's - guessed by Pure Mood)

And with 5 correct answers Cap'n Plety is your winner. Pure Mood, also with five, almost repeated, but Cap'n beats her in the tie-breaker with guessing his first. Make sure you drop by the 15th of September to see if you can win next month lyrics quiz (or just stop by everyday, there should be something for you to enjoy untill the next quiz).

Being That Sane Can Drive You Nuts

I’m a huge Adam Sandler fan so much I could quote every line from Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore, and The Waterboy for much of the late 90’s. Going into the new millennium, Sandler seem to not be able to decide whether to stick with his sophomoric shtick as with Little Nicky or move into a more sophisticated style as he did in Punch Drunk Love. And of course there is always romantic comedy with Drew Barrymore. His latest trek into the sophisticated realm was Spanglish.

The backdrop of the film is an essay a student has written for her application to Yale. It explains why her mother is the person she most admires and goes on to explain how her mom took her from Mexico and made her the person she was today. The problem with this is that the movie then doesn’t revolve around the young girl yet focuses on the family he mother began to work for upon arriving in America. In fact the girl gets very little screen time in the movie. The family includes Sandler as the dad with an inferiority complex at being the best chef in the country, his wife, played by Téa Leoni, a victim of downsizing who can quite adapt to being a stay at home mom. They have two children, a son who barely makes blip on screen and an overweight daughter played by an actress who tries to pull off the “wise beyond her age” act but isn’t able to do so. Alcoholic grandma also lives with them played perfectly by Cloris Leachman who delivers the best line in the movie, “Honey, lately, your low self-esteem is just good common sense.” That line has entered into my repertoire of insults and can’t wait until I find the perfect time to unleash it.

The movie finally hit its stride when the family movies to a beach house for the summer when Sandler’s family is introduced to the Mexican girl who is forced to move in with them due to distance reasons. Leoni finds in her the daughter she always wanted which causes problem with basically everyone else in the film.

The film is well written finding a balance in-between drama and comedy and also features what was one of the most disturbing sex scenes I have seen in a while. If that ever happen to me, I may have to give up sex for a while. As for the negatives, the movie seems to forget that is it based on an essay and there are many things that I doubt the girl ever knew yet she is able to write about it. Also all the driving scenes it is very obvious that green screens were used and they looked as bad as a SNL skit. A big budget movie should avoid such pitfalls. On the DVD, don’t forget to check out the deleted scenes to see one of the funniest scenes with Leoni’s character preparing for a party. Although the other scenes make you understand why they left out.

Spanglish gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

So Eat It, Just Eat It

In my youth I ate anything that wasn’t good for me. And if something was good for me, I would even try it going so far as to routinely refuse salads that would come with entrée’s at restaurants. I had to save room for some grease covered main course. And this all took place under the supervision of my parents. When I move off to college, thing would get worse. Well balanced breakfasts were replaced by Pop Tarts and the occasional glazed doughnut. On the weekends, the campus McDonalds ran a special foe the 20 piece McNugget and that would suffice for a meal or two each weekend. Plus my dorm room would constantly be stocked with Gummy Bears & M&M’s although the dorm mates ate their fair share of my stuff. Although in my defense, it wasn’t all bad, I long ago cut carbonated drinks (sans beer while in college) out of my diet and only have two cans a month

Then a couple years ago, I was getting my eyes checked when my eye doctor gave me a weird prognosis: I had high cholesterol. You may be wondering, like I did, how an eye doctor can give such a diagnosis. Apparently the body leaves cholesterol deposits in your eyes that cannot be removed. This happens to everyone and it not at all harmful. My problem, as the doctor explained, was I had the cholesterol build up of some one almost three times my age. At that moment, I sensed my own mortality for the first time.

So I went on a health kick after that. I routinely ate salads and avoided fast food except for picking up the occasional salad there. I even started reading labels for the first time in my life and even learned the difference between good cholesterol and the bad kind. I would only splurge on special occasions like holidays and cook-outs.

Then after about two months on the health kick, I saw an ad for free cholesterol screening. After hearing that my cholesterol was so high from the eye doctor, I figured I’d check out exactly how high the number was. Granted I had to be dragged there due to my overwhelming fear of needles, but free helped ease the tension a little. So after the test, I waited patiently for a couple weeks eating my salads until the results came back. And when the results finally arrived, I found something shocking: not only was my cholesterol wasn’t high, it was abnormally low for someone like me according to my mom, who happens to be a nurse. So that day, all the salads, and other health foods went in the trash and diners was catered by McDonalds for a week straight.

But once my cholesterol high went down, I realized that someday my cholesterol will rise considering my family tree is littered with such problems. So today I find myself in a happy medium between my eating habits of my youth and the months I was a health nut.

That leads me to today (wow, that took a while, but anyways). Recently I have had some digestive problems and realized that I needed to get more food with antioxidants. Last week, as I was at the grocery store, there was just happened to be a display of green tea with antioxidants. Ask and you shall receive. So I picked up a box. The only problem is I’ve never drunk tea before, nor have really been around people who drank it aside from ice tea. So not knowing any better, I took the tea bag and put it in a tall class of water and let it soak for a couple minutes. And when I drank the tea, it basically tasted like water. I was later told that you are supposed to use hot water unlike the strait from the refrigerator like did. It would have been nice had they put the intrusions on the box. (Granted upon further inspection, there were, indeed, intrusions on the box. What can I say, I’m a dude.) So on the second try the other night, I went ahead and boiled some water and poured it over the bag. But there is one major problem with that, It’s (expletive deleted) hot. It was an hour before it was cool enough to drink. Then when I drank it, I started to sweat profusely and had a feeling I hadn’t felt since the last Santana concert I attended. I even ended up chasing the green tea with a can of Dr. Pepper. And that lasted all night as I woke up a few times in a puddle of sweat multiples time.

So the moral to this story is 1) never trust your eye doctor when he gives you his diagnosis of your cholesterol level and 2) to all the kiddies out there, never grow old. Seriously, where Ponce De Leon when you need him?

I'd Rather Play You on My TV

Tommy Lee might as well be the male counterpart of Paris Hilton. Yeah he has a steady job, but let’s be honest, he’s always been more famous for who he’s dated and his extra curricular activities rather than any of his music especially since the hair-metal was killed by grunge. Trying to find a niche in music since he originally split from Mötley Crüe, Tommy has everything including trying to ride the rap-metal craze of the late 90’s, not with much success. Tommy is back with a new album, Tommyland: The Ride, riding in on the wave of mellow rockers such as Nickelback. Oh, and not so coincidentally, the album coincides with his new reality series. Well he needs to keep up with Paris.

The album start off on a bad foot when I actually thought that the song was skipping, but it took me a while to realize that the song was supposed to sound like that. Good Time then diverts into what amounts to a post-Fly Sugar Ray song. Well except Mark McGrath is a better singer. The songs on the album defiantly sound better when Lee hands off the vocal duties to his all-star friends. And by all-star, I mean people who are less than five years away from appearing on The Surreal Life. The dude from Fuel helps out on Sister Mary, the dude from Nickelback lends a hand to Tryin’ to be Me, Tommy duets with Dirty Harry on Makin’ Me Crazy, and Nick Carter (yes from the Backstreet Boys and ironically former boy toy of Paris) makes an appearance during the surprisingly sweet Say Goodbye. Tommy really can’t bring in the quality of acts that Santana can on his recent star studded albums.

The Madden brothers of Good (well let’s be honest, Mediocre) Charlotte, the dude Sum41 (you know, the one who also dated Paris), and Dave Navarro appear on the most unintentionally funny song in a while, Tired. The song sounds like a diversion of GC’s Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous with lyrics like, “Tommy got tired of Pamela, Ed got tired of Salma, Puffy got tired of JLo and Ben did too.” But the song is much funnier than anything GC can do. And I’m sure Ed, Puffy (although my sources tell me it’s just Diddy now, but you can’t fault Tommy for not keeping up), Ben, and Hef (who gets namedropped later) are all wondering, “Why are you dragging us into your drama?” In the end, Tommy is still trying to find his voice, but apparently until then, he is content with biting other people’s style.

Song to Download – Makin’ Me Crazy (unless you want a good laugh, then check out Tired)

Tommyland: The Ride gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

Yell Out in Defiance

Pennywise has been making pure punk music for over a decade even as the pseudo-punk bands of today like Good Charlotte and band of their ilk have watered down the genre lately. Even Pennywise’s contemporary in the so-cal scene, The Offspring, has moved in a more pop direction lately. But Pennywise has shown on their latest album, The Fuse, they have no signs of softening up anytime soon.

On the album, which is still being released by the legendary Epitaph label, the guitars are still loud, the drums are fast, and the boys are still angry. So any old fan or true punk fan will enjoy this album. And being their first album since the election, songs about the state of the world since take precedent. On Dying, “Polarized lies of the fascist sleaze, Lining up the shadowed gaze, Beheaded for a shallow grave, Whoring in complacency.” Then on 18 Soldier, the band takes a look at the loss of war, “18 fathers visit the graves, Locked in violence resigned to their fate, Fallen Idols are cracked at the base, Hollow silence alone in their place, Retaliation is blind, With underestimated losses of life”

The media also gets their knocks on the album. The band could do without the media as a whole during Disconnect, “Just too much information, Electronic Stimulation, All this media saturation, Just gives me more aggravation.” They also focus in on Fox New with the aptly titled Fox TV, “Make way for the next sensation, Factual Manipulation, Stay tuned for the next creation, Department of misinformation.” But then again, who isn’t getting tired of the 24 hour news stations who spend more time making news than reporting it.

The biggest problem with the album is that, even at 42 minutes, the album seems to wear on to long. Towards the end, it gets really hard to distinguish one song from another. They could have trimmed the album down a little to give the listeners a better ability to digest the songs properly.

Song to Download – Fox TV

The Fuse gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

You Came Out of Nowhere, Made Me Smile

I never really listened to Nickel Creek. All I had to know that my sister liked them and that was enough for me to stay away. Added that I was under the impression that they were country gave me extra reason to stay away. But I gave a listen to their latest album, Why Should the Fire Die? when some one mentioned that the album was heavier, I decided to throw away any preconceived notions and give it an unbiased listen. I was pleasantly surprised at what I heard. The country label isn’t really a good one for the band as bluegrass would be a better one as their sound would fit better on the O Brother, Where Art Thou? soundtrack than in the Boot Scootin’ Saloon.

Why Should the Fire Die? starts off with one of my favorite phrases, When in Rome. It fit my experience for the album perfectly as a newbie to Nickel Creek. Although When in Rome is partly sarcastic pointing out it’s not always good to “do as the Romans do.” Going with the flow can sometimes turns out bad: “Where can a teacher go, wherever she thinks people need the things she knows. Hey those books you gave us look good on the shelves at home and they'll burn 'em in the fireplace. Teacher, when in Rome.” A bad break up is at the root of Some One Like You. “I hope you meet someone your height so you can see eye-to-eye with someone as small as you.” All I have to say is ouch. Elsewhere on the album, there are a few relationship song as seen by the titles; Eveline, Anthony, Doubting Thomas, Helena.

There are three instrumental songs here, usually an instant fast forward moment when not associated with a Pink Floyd album, but all of them from Nickel Creek held my interest. Scotch & Chocolate, a wonderful combination by the way, starts out slow and builds to a good down home feeling. On Stumptown, the group takes turns trading solos on their respective instruments. The First and Last Dance is an airy song that does sound like it was influenced by a Pink Floyd instrumental or two.

The highlight of the album is whenever the female of the group takes over the lead vocals such as on the song Tomorrow is a Long Time. Also there is Anthony which sounds like it was recorded back in the time of Leadbelly. She also takes over a verse in another great song, Best of Luck. For the guys, Can’t Complain is their standout track. The guy is trying to convince himself, since he warned his partner that he was a man, anything he does should be excused. "I told her I could love her, I told her I could lie, so she can’t complain." This a trick every guy should try.

Song to Download – Tomorrow is a Long Time

Why Should the Fire Die? gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

State Your Peace

Back in 94, I was watching Letterman, which I did obsessively back then, and caught a brand new band perform one of the most refreshing song I’ve heard for the longest time. The next day, I strolled down to the local Borders and picked up Hootie and the Blowfish’s Cracked Rear View. For me, it the best pop album ever made, any song on it could have been a hit. From there, I religiously drank the Hootie kool-aid, buying up shirts, hats, towels and playing the album for anyone who would listen. Months later, as everyone knows the story by now, they exploded with Hold My Hand, Let Her Cry, and Only Wanna Be with You getting played on the radio about once every half an hour. I had one buddy of mine told me he knew Hootie was over exposed the moment his sister bought their CD.

With Fairweather Johnson, the band expanded their horizon taking more chances. Same goes for Musical Chairs although there were some missteps on that album. By the time their self titled album came around, it seemed they had fallen into a rut. None of the songs really stood out or compared with earlier triumphs. Darius Rucker did bounce back on his solo album, Back to Then, so I did have hope going their latest album.

But the boys settled back into their self-titled rut with the release of Looking For Lucky as there are not many stand out tracks that are on par with their earlier work or even Darius’ solo project. Leaving comes close with its bluegrass influence and harmonies by a female vocalist. The closer, Waltz into Me feature a mandolin set to, obviously, a waltz. Get Out of My Mind is the best “pop” song on the album. But the other songs just seem to run into each other and before you notice, the album is done.

Hootie has become more overtly political on this album. Granted that have touch on issues such as racism in the past, but they were at times subversive. The opener, State Your Peace, is an ode to our first amendment rights. Yet a couple songs later, they also encourage people to make sure they watch what they say with The Killing Stone. Another Year’s Gone By, which has a great guitar hook, is about dealing with the effect that 9/11 had on our society years after the fact. Looking for Lucky, as a whole, is better than the self titled album, but I’m still waiting for something as good as the albums they made during the 90’s.

Song to Download – Leaving

Looking for Lucky gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

A Melancholy Happy Trails to Peter Jennings

Sorry for the small post today, was stuck most of day golfing (or whatever you call what I do on a golf course, many would argue what I do should not be called golfing), then had some family obligations to do afterwards where I won the annual McGavin family croquet match. I would like to take some time to honor Peter Jennings. Even though I was a Tom Brokaw kind of guy, I still liked to check out other news coverage on election nights and other major events and really enjoyed his commentaries on them. I also check out a few of his special investigation that were always well done. For more on the life of Jennings, check out ABC News anchor Peter Jennings dies at 67.

Just a quick note, there will be a few (I’m shooting for four right now) album reviews up this week with music ranging from rock to pop to bluegrass to punk, so look out for that starting tomorrow and should have one out every day until Friday.

Also, as I’m sure the repeat viewers can tell, I put up a new background yesterday, any feedback on that would be much appreciated.

Car Mix - August '05

Here are some song to listen to that will fit on a single CD that you can play in your car, at the beach, a barbeque, or anywhere that need some summer music to dance to.

1. Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band (Live 8) – Paul McCartney & U2 (I started off this CD with two of my performances from the Live 8 concerts.)
2. Bittersweet Symphony (Live 8) – Coldplay & Richard Ashcroft
3. Fix You – Coldplay (One of the few songs on their latest album that stands up to their earlier work.)
4. City of Blinding Light – U2
5. All These Things I’ve Done – The Killers (This song features one of my favorite lyrics in recent memory, “I got soul, but I’m not a soldier.”)
6. Somebody Rock Me – The Clash vs. The Killers (This is a killer mash-up, lame pun intended.)
7. Son’s Gonna Rise – Citizen Cope & Santana (A cool song that you may recognize from a recent car commercial. This guy should be getting a lot more publicity than he’s getting.)
8. The Harder They Come – Willie Nelson (A country artist doing a reggae song? Only Willie, and a whole lot of pot, can pull that off.)
9. Portions for Foxes – Rilo Kiley (Depressingly sad lyrics dressed up with bouncing music makes this song pop gold.)
10. Me Plus One – Annie (iTunes Single of the Week has been offering up some bland music recently, but my ears pop up when I first heard this. It is quite possibly the best pop song since the 80’s. The song would fit very well in a Tom Tom Club album.)
11. These Word – Natasha Bedingfield (When I first heard this song, I wasn’t very impressed, but by the end I was sing, “I love you, I love you, I love you,” right with the song.)
12. She Said – Brie Larson (Not as good as the previous three in the pop department, but a lot better than the overproduced music clogging the radio these days.)
13. Love Love Love – Tristan Prettyman (Check of my review of her album – I Wish You Couldn’t Take Your Eyes Off of Me.)
14. Spending One of These Nights with Kelly – The Eagles vs. Kelly Clarkson (This is one of the most disturbingly entertaining songs ever created.)
15. Pon De Replay – Rihanna (Introducing this summer’s ubiquitous club anthem. Although if you played it back to back with last year’s ubiquitous club anthem, Move Ya Body, I’m not sure if I could tell them apart.)
16. Go – Common, John Mayer & Kanye West (Hip-hop good boy gets help getting dirty with Mr. You Body is a Wonderland and the Workout Plan King.)
17. Diamonds Are Forever (Remix) – Kanye West & Jay-Z (I mentioned this song a couple weeks ago in regards to its blood diamonds topic, check it out here – Throw Up Your Diamonds Like You’re Bulimic.)
18. Mind on the Road – Reverend Run (Sampling Joan Jett’s I Love Rock n Roll, this song rivals anything he did with Run-DMC. Just skip the cheesy video, but if you must, click here.)

Here Come the Judge vol. II

In an interesting turn of events, it appears that Supreme Court nominee, John Roberts, helped gay rights activist win a landmark Supreme Court decision. I can't imagine that this will sit well with the religious fanatics. Add this to the story he is possibly anti-abortion which irritated the fanatics faction of the Democratic Party should make for an interesting conformation hearing. Now if only they can link Roberts to Long Dong Silver. And since I'm a big fan of pissing off fanatics on both sides, I'm beginning to like Roberts more everyday. Now if only I can find out his stance on Eminent Domain. For more on this story check out:

In private practices, Robert's record is mixed
Court NomineeAdvised Group on Group Rights
And my original take - Here Comes the Judge

What's My Name?

There was a sports story this week that was drowned out by the Rafael Palmeiro story (see pervious post for my view). A problem that is almost as devastating to sports as steroids, if not worse. This problem is the renaming of stadiums/arenas. For years I could laugh at sports fans in other cities that had to go to places like Petco Park, Heinz Field, McAfee Coliseum, Safeco Field, 3Com Park just to name a few of the lamer ones. But here in Cleveland, we haven’t sold out to the highest bidders because our owners were such egomaniacs that they named the stadiums after themselves; Gund Arena, Jacobs Field, and Browns Stadium. Now Dan Gilbert, the new owner of the Cavs has gone and ruined it renaming the Gund to Quicken Loans Arena. Already trying to diffuse the backlash, they already have a marketing scheme to nickname it the “Q.” Quicken Loans, The Q, I don’t care, I’m boycotting it. I’ll much sooner travel up to the Palace at Auburn Hill before stepping one foot in The “Q.”

I have no idea why owners sell their souls to give naming rights to a company. First of all, we, the consumer, do not get the discount on the ticket prices, if anything, ticket prices have gone way up since the renaming boom of the 90’s. And it doesn’t seem very good investment for the companies either. It may seem like a good marketing move, but does anyone know what Qualcomm, Safeco, or Comerica do? No one knew what Enron did because they named the Astros’ ballpark. People only became aware that it was an energy firm until it ruined its employees’ lives. And the Astros might as well kept the Enron moniker because what they replaced it with is the silliest of all the names, Minute Maid Park. Do people in Houston say, “Hey, wanna go to the Maid tonight?” Is the divorce rate in Houston gone up because husbands have spent too much time with the Maid?

Going back to Cleveland, Gilbert should have done is stick with the city’s tradition and renamed it the Gilbert Arena. How funny would that be? (For those who don’t follow the NBA, there is a player named Gilbert Arenas.)

Big Head Rafael and the Monsters

Okay, that title doesn’t have the same ring as Big Head Barry, because Rafael’s dome isn’t so big that it looks like it will topple off his neck at any given moment like Barry's. But one thing that Barry can say that Rafael can’t is that he has never tested positive for steroids, well unless you count allegedly admitting he took steroids in front of a federal grand jury. And I am just that Big Head Barry announcement that he will not play this season came just hours after Palmeiro’s test result came out. Bonds want to defect any negative attention he can. Of course Barry, the best way to defect attention is just retire, do everyone a favor and announce that as soon as possible.

My biggest problem of this whole Palmeiro situation is how long this has taken. Reportedly, the failed test came back in May and it has taken this long for his suspension came out. I mention last week about how slow it took for Kenny “The Gambler” Rogers to finally start his suspension, and Palmeiro took even longer. And I’m not the only one, Rep. Cristopher Shays of Connecticut, the No. 2 Republican on the Government Reform Committee said,

“I find it pretty amazing if this was a test that was scored months and months and months ago. Why take so long is beyond me. It's just another example of how the players rule. If someone tests positive, the determination should be much quicker and the punishment should be much more severe.”

My suggestion to fix this is that the sports league needs to set up their suspensions like the US Courts system where you sit in jail until your trial. In terms of the major leagues, you serve your suspension the day it comes down, and if you want an appeal, you better hurry to the commissioner’s office to get it overturned before you miss too many games. And in both cases, if they were wrong, they will give you a hardy “Sorry” on your way out. But while mulling the suspension, Palmeiro just happened to get his 3000 hit, to which MLB openly celebrated even though it knew that he had tested positive for steroids.

It turned out today the steroid found in Palmeiro’s test was Winstrol, which was made famous by Ben Johnson at the 1988 Olympics. Not so ironically, Johnson also did not knowingly take the substance and suggested some one spiked his drink. Not very likely as my source said that is something that is injected into the bloodstream nor is something you would find at your local GMC. This drug doesn’t really sound like something that you could take unintentionally unless Palmeiro is a diabetic and his doctor told him it was insulin.

It also looks like Joseph McCarthy and his cronies are back on the case too as Palmeiro has agreed to release documents regarding his positive test to Congress. Like he really had a choice, he had as much of a choice to go before the Congressional Hearing in the first place. You remember back in March when Palmeiro waged his finger at Congress like the chick from Survivor and read a paper that said he has never done steroids. Rep. Tom Davis, R-Va said,

“As a practical matter, perjury referrals are uncommon. Prosecutions are rare. But this is a high-profile case, so I think it will get an honest look-see. I don't think anyone can avoid it. If we did nothing I think we'd look like idiots, don't you?”

Well, yeah, but you do nothing for most of the year, looking like idiots and yet you politicians have been doing that for year. And let’s not forget the last time you brought up perjury charges on some one. You had all the in the evidence right down to a stained dress and couldn’t get a conviction.

The biggest question here is should Palmeiro be elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame. The answer is quite easy: no. Here we have a proven cheater. And this is not cheating like Sosa’s corked bat or pitchers scuffing the ball. Palmeiro, and any other steroid user, chemically alter their body. A corked bat can affect a play; steroids affect whole seasons and more. This should be considered much worse than what Pete Rose did and should keep any known steroid users out of the Hall and any suspected users should have a long look taken at them before they are let in. If that means a whole generation is left out, then so be it. Just induct managers, broadcasters, and journalist for the next fifteen years unless you are positive they are clean.

As a result of all this, it looks like Jose Cansaco is going to write yet another naming even more name. It is really sad when Cansaco is one of the few guys in baseball today that you can trust to tell the truth these days. I’m not sure who read the last book or who will read the next one as he is one the most excruciatingly painful dude to listen to on The Surreal Life. The guy could barely form sentences on the show.

I Wish You Couldn't Take Your Eyes Off of Me

This year, there has been an influx of female singer-songwriters. Most of them have yet to make a major impact on the charts or on the radio but have built a cult following (to which I drink the Kool-Aid for some of them). It may be wise is these ladies to pester Sarah McLaughlin to restart the Lilith Fair to help break the monotony of the overproduced girls that are clogging up the radio waves. The latest Lilith ready singer is Tristan Prettyman.

Prettyman makes breezy music than gives you visions of sitting on a beach at night around a bonfire with friends around as one leisurely strums an acoustic guitar. This description quickly brings to mind a comparison to another surfer turned rocker, Jack Johnson. Prettyman’s debut album Twentythree, which alludes to her age, starts off with a breezy acoustic guitar that turns into the bouncy first single, Love, Love, Love. The song should not be confused with Natasha Bedingfield's, These Words where she repeats “I love you, I love you, I love you.” Tristan’s song sets the beach mood with lyrics like, “When the summer’s here, the waves are crashing, no time for thinking, don’t even ask me” which make the album a great addition to any beach party or barbeque this summer.

Tristan also puts her mark on what seems to be the new female singer-songwriting staple, Breathe (also see Anna Nalick, Michelle Branch, and Faith Hill for other songs on the subject or if you want to go way back, and male, try Pink Floyd). But as the others are tranquil songs, Prettyman makes it into a song of longing, “I wish I could breathe. I wish you couldn’t take your eyes off of me. Oh, but it’s never as easy as it seems.”

Jason Mraz, recovering from a poor sophomore album (read my review - It Takes a Thought to Make a Sound), makes an appearance on the coy Shy That Way. The two singers trade verses about the pining that is usually reserved Middle School dances but somehow avoid making the song sound childish. Tristan starts off, “If you were more daring maybe you'd stop staring and come over and talk to me.” To which Jason responds, “The way she keeps her distance keepin’ my interest so I’ll keep it consistent.”

Song to Download – Love Love Love

Twentythree gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

Are You Ready for Some Football?

To some males, August is the greatest month of the year for one reason and one reason only: the release of the latest Madden game. There will be plenty of guys next week who will spend all day going through five years in dynasty mode. Personally, I’m not that obsessed, as I typically go with an every other year approach. But the franchise is defiantly warranted a spot into the Scooter Hall of Fame as the August inductee.

Back in the 80’s, I bought all the sports games Atari had to offer even though the players were basically dashes and the balls typically were just squares. As I moved to the Nintendo, I really didn’t play that many sports games since I was young and was more mesmerized by all the cute characters the company pumped out at the time. Then, after I got the Super Nintendo, a buddy and I were out shopping and stopped into the local Toys R Us to look at he games when we spotted Madden 95. We didn’t even have to say anything, we just looked at it, then each other, and both shook our heads simultaneously. Madden quickly overtook Mario Cart as the game that was constantly on. And, of course like most of the early Madden games, it was all offense all the time: on-side kicks, going for it on 4th and long with the QB Waggle, and no one would run the clock out at the end of the game because everyone would rather risk losing just to run up the score. And if there was no one around, you could always go with the season mode and guide your own team to the Super Bowl.

Madden quickly went off my radar for a couple years because I refuse to acknowledge that there was any football if the Browns were not involved, so I primarily stuck to Triple Play, FIFA, and NHL for my sports fix.

By the time the Browns were back, so was my obsession with Madden, but now it had moved to the Playstation. And with the newer system, the game with better graphics, actual commentary by Madden and Summerall, and to make sure no males between the ages of 13-30 would get any work done, a franchise mode. Here you could play multiple seasons where people would retire and you would replace them with your own draft picks.

Everything got even more in depth with the jump to the Playstation 2. A soundtrack was added. This wasn’t always a good thing as my hatred of Good Charlotte comes from hearing The Anthem contently for six months straight. Mini camps were also added so you can build-up the quality of your players. And the franchise was expanded exponentially to when you could set the prices specific to the city like tickets prices of the Dawg Pound in Cleveland. You can relocate you team to almost any city in North America. On the last Madden, I move the Baltimore Raven (because they don’t deserve to exist) to Hartford and had a Whalers’ football team.

It’s doubtful that will pick up this year’s edition as I have last year which I really enjoyed the hit stick. Also the pitiful Browns will have a horrible rating, so it would hard to win a fair game against Steeler fans. Although once the game goes into the discount bin, I may change my mind.

The Best of INXS

One show you will not catch me watching this year is Karaoke Star: INXS for the same reason I don’t watch American Karaoke: if these singers had any real talent at all, they would have a record contract already. And here are 20 other reasons why that chronicle the best INXS, with the irreplaceable Michael Hutchence, had to offer. This album clocks in at 75:46.

1. The One Thing - Shabooh Shoobah
2. What You Need – Listen Like Thieves
3. Need You Tonight – Kick
4. Mediate – Kick
5. New Sensation – Kick
6. Devil Inside – Kick
7. Never Tear Us Apart – Kick
8. The Stairs – X
9. Disappear – X
10. Bitter Tears – X
11. Suicide Blonde – X
12. Heaven Sent - Welcome to Wherever You Are
13. Baby Don’t Cry – Welcome to Wherever You Are
14. Beautiful Girl - Welcome to Wherever You Are
15. Not Enough Time - Welcome to Wherever You Are
16. Never Tear Us Apart – Live Baby Live
17. This Time – Live Baby Live
18. The Stairs – Live Baby Live
19. It Takes a New Sensation – INXS vs. Rob Base
20. Intergalactic (Soulwax Remix) – Beastie Boys vs. Herbie Hancock vs. INXS vs. AC/DC

Record People Are Shady IV

The record companies are at it again. The executives at Sony BMG Music Entertainment have settled out of court to cease its pay for play practices, otherwise known as payola. Even more proof as to why radio sucks massively. So not only has play lists shrank in recent years, some of the few songs being played on the radio were so lame, the only way the radio program mangers is if they were given lavish gifts in returned. Oddly enough these program managers were not punished for accepting what amounts to a bribe (yet). Some horrible music that the radio listening public were forced to sit through include Jennifer Lopez’s I’m Real, Get Right, and I’m Glad, Good Charlotte’s Hold On and I Just Wanna Live, Jessica Simpson’s Take My Breathe Away. It was also found that the Sony hired people to request these songs and instructed the girls to sound drunk because if they were more excited the more likely their request would make it on air. And Sony’s response:

"Despite federal and state laws prohibiting unacknowledged payment by record labels to radio stations for airing of music, such direct and indirect forms of what has been described generically as 'payola' for spins has continued to be an unfortunately prevalent aspect of radio promotion. Sony BMG acknowledges that various employees pursed some radio promotion practices on behalf of the company that were wrong and improper and apologizes for such conduct. Sony BMG looks forward to defining a new, higher standard in radio promotion."

How nice of Sony to throw their employee under the bus because we all know that the higher up’s encouraged this. For their efforts, Sony has to donate $10 million to local charities fund programs aimed at music education and appreciation. We can look forward for other record companies to be caught doing the same thing as they are currently under investigation. And hopefully we can look forward to no more J-Lo or Good Charlotte on the radio because neither makes music that anyone would listen to without getting paid for it.

Hopefully Grandma Will Get Run Over By a Reindeer

A couple days ago, I posted a tidbit on Hilary Clinton fight against Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas (check out my review – Welcome to the Jungle). Well it seem that another old, dumb, woman is joining the fight. A grandmother from the Bronx has filed a civil suit Wednesday for engaged in false, misleading and deceptive practices. A quick recap of the hoopla – you can find a key on the internet that can unlock a scene involving two digital characters having sex. The grandmother bought the game for her 14 year old grandson and is now distraught that her grandson would be witness to such an act. Keep in mind, on the cover (see right) there are pictures depicting multiple guns, gambling, gang colors, and a woman in a bikini licking her lips while on the back there are more guns and text talking about “dealers and gangbangers.” It is also clearly stated that the game is rated M for Mature (17+) and contains Blood and Gore, Intense Violence, Strong Language, Strong Sexual Content, and Use of Drugs. Keep in mind she bought this for a 14 year old. Even without a sex scene, a 14 year old shouldn’t be playing this. I haven’t found out if this grandmother is the legal guardian for the kid, but if she is, and I was social services, I would take that kid away from her.

One of the few things I agree with George Bush on is the need to get rid of frivolous lawsuits and this case is warranted. The only problem is, like many of his campaign promises, he has yet to do anything about this. It time to stand up and get rid of this frivolous lawsuit, and ones like it and then go after the real culprit, the grandmother for buying the kid the game in the first place even with the 17+ warning on it. Of course if she wins, I’ll have no problem collecting my portion of the payout. And it will set a presentiment that will let me sue the makers of Who Framed Rodger Rabbit for adding a from of a naked Jessica Rabbit in their movie, the makers of The Little Mermaid for inserting multiple phallic symbols in their movie, and the makers of White Chicks for stealing 90 minutes of my life that I can never get back.

Back to the Ice

Ladies and gentlemen, the first shoe has dropped; Bob Goodenow has stepped down as the head of NHL Player’s Association. Now all we need is Gary Betman to follow him into early retirement, then maybe we can actually enjoy hockey this season. It was pretty obvious that Goodenow would jump ship after being beaten down like a red-headed step child in the labor negotiations. Had he just given in to a salary cap last year at this time instead of just a couple weeks ago, we would have had hockey last season.

So we will have the NHL draft this weekend and the Pittsburg Penguins won the Sidney Crosby sweepstake. Didn’t they just have the last savior of the NHL? It is interesting that will be conducting the draft like your normal fantasy draft, so Tampa Bay will have the 30th and 31st pick even thought Pittsburg get the number 1 pick, their next pick will be the 60th overall. And the draft will be really important for some teams as many have as few as seven players currently signed to their rosters.

And it didn’t take long for Congress to get on the NHL about their drub policies stating it has too many loopholes. The Congress need to understand that, much like basketball, hockey is a sport of agility, something that steroids would actually hurt you instead of helping. Just stick to football and baseball guys (and dolls).

And speaking of baseball, apparently the trade deadline is also this weekend. This has to be the weakest rumor mill since the inception of free agency. The biggest names on the block this year are Danny Baez and some dude from the Pirates. Seriously, this is really sad.

Staying with baseball, Kenny Rodgers finally folded ‘em last night and served the first game of his suspension this almost a month to the day of the altercation. And people wonder way it took so long to get a steroids policy into place. Bud really needs to take a page out David Stern’ playbook and hear the appeal the next day and go, “thanks for the talk, but the ruling stands.” Then he could revoke the all-star appearance to boot, but Bud shows why he’s the biggest push-over in sports.

Lastly, with a win tonight, my Astros can pull into a tie for the wild card. Hopefully they don’t waste some good prospects just to pick up Baez or that dude from the Pirates, as long as the Clemens back is good, the Astros are almost a lock for the playoffs.

What We Have Been Waiting For

Ladies and gentlemen, it is time to welcome the return of rock. And by rock, I don’t mean the pseudo-punk bands that sound more like the Backstreet Boys than The Clash (think Good Charlotte) or the pretentious rock coming out of New York (think The Strokes). I’m talking about the old time rock and roll Bob Seger talked about. This rock can be found in the form of Daphne Loves Derby. O.K., the name is cheesy in a Jonnie Loves Chachi kind of way, but it’s not anywise than Hoobastank or Limp Bizquit, and the music is definably better than those bands. On the rock spectrum, Daphne Loves Derby falls somewhere between Better Than Ezra and Jimmy Eat World.

The music stays upbeat throughout On the Strength of All Convinced, slowing down for Birthday Gallery, a song about a guy trying to accept everything a girl tells him, “Believe me, I believe everything you say. Even if you claimed you heard a ghost sing songs.” They also slow it down for the acoustic Pollen and Salt and the mellow Debussie. With the song Kirby, Daphne Loves Derby channels their northwest roots with a grunge influenced vibe (they grew up not far from Seattle). On the downside, it’s hard to distinguish some song from other and with only ten songs; the album can get repetitive real quickly.

Lyrically is where the band shines, topics range admiration of a girl (You, Are the strength inside my veins. Oh, I want to feel the strength you know. – Sundays), pondering the end of a relationship (Don't ask me to think good intentions will change everything. This could be the last day that I hold my breath and wait for you. – Hammers and Hearts), and regret (Please let me take your pain away for one day – Middle Middle). Hopefully this album is only a sign of what’s to come. If they can branch out musically in the future, they will be around fort a long time.

Song to Download – Sundays

On the Strength of All Convinced gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.