Big Head Rafael and the Monsters

Okay, that title doesn’t have the same ring as Big Head Barry, because Rafael’s dome isn’t so big that it looks like it will topple off his neck at any given moment like Barry's. But one thing that Barry can say that Rafael can’t is that he has never tested positive for steroids, well unless you count allegedly admitting he took steroids in front of a federal grand jury. And I am just that Big Head Barry announcement that he will not play this season came just hours after Palmeiro’s test result came out. Bonds want to defect any negative attention he can. Of course Barry, the best way to defect attention is just retire, do everyone a favor and announce that as soon as possible.

My biggest problem of this whole Palmeiro situation is how long this has taken. Reportedly, the failed test came back in May and it has taken this long for his suspension came out. I mention last week about how slow it took for Kenny “The Gambler” Rogers to finally start his suspension, and Palmeiro took even longer. And I’m not the only one, Rep. Cristopher Shays of Connecticut, the No. 2 Republican on the Government Reform Committee said,

“I find it pretty amazing if this was a test that was scored months and months and months ago. Why take so long is beyond me. It's just another example of how the players rule. If someone tests positive, the determination should be much quicker and the punishment should be much more severe.”

My suggestion to fix this is that the sports league needs to set up their suspensions like the US Courts system where you sit in jail until your trial. In terms of the major leagues, you serve your suspension the day it comes down, and if you want an appeal, you better hurry to the commissioner’s office to get it overturned before you miss too many games. And in both cases, if they were wrong, they will give you a hardy “Sorry” on your way out. But while mulling the suspension, Palmeiro just happened to get his 3000 hit, to which MLB openly celebrated even though it knew that he had tested positive for steroids.

It turned out today the steroid found in Palmeiro’s test was Winstrol, which was made famous by Ben Johnson at the 1988 Olympics. Not so ironically, Johnson also did not knowingly take the substance and suggested some one spiked his drink. Not very likely as my source said that is something that is injected into the bloodstream nor is something you would find at your local GMC. This drug doesn’t really sound like something that you could take unintentionally unless Palmeiro is a diabetic and his doctor told him it was insulin.

It also looks like Joseph McCarthy and his cronies are back on the case too as Palmeiro has agreed to release documents regarding his positive test to Congress. Like he really had a choice, he had as much of a choice to go before the Congressional Hearing in the first place. You remember back in March when Palmeiro waged his finger at Congress like the chick from Survivor and read a paper that said he has never done steroids. Rep. Tom Davis, R-Va said,

“As a practical matter, perjury referrals are uncommon. Prosecutions are rare. But this is a high-profile case, so I think it will get an honest look-see. I don't think anyone can avoid it. If we did nothing I think we'd look like idiots, don't you?”

Well, yeah, but you do nothing for most of the year, looking like idiots and yet you politicians have been doing that for year. And let’s not forget the last time you brought up perjury charges on some one. You had all the in the evidence right down to a stained dress and couldn’t get a conviction.

The biggest question here is should Palmeiro be elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame. The answer is quite easy: no. Here we have a proven cheater. And this is not cheating like Sosa’s corked bat or pitchers scuffing the ball. Palmeiro, and any other steroid user, chemically alter their body. A corked bat can affect a play; steroids affect whole seasons and more. This should be considered much worse than what Pete Rose did and should keep any known steroid users out of the Hall and any suspected users should have a long look taken at them before they are let in. If that means a whole generation is left out, then so be it. Just induct managers, broadcasters, and journalist for the next fifteen years unless you are positive they are clean.

As a result of all this, it looks like Jose Cansaco is going to write yet another naming even more name. It is really sad when Cansaco is one of the few guys in baseball today that you can trust to tell the truth these days. I’m not sure who read the last book or who will read the next one as he is one the most excruciatingly painful dude to listen to on The Surreal Life. The guy could barely form sentences on the show.