The king of all award shows is on the horizon, the MTV Video Music Awards. Yes the last couple years have been disappointing, especially last year host-less edition that spawned zero water cooler moments. This year we do have a host, P. Diddy, who could do a good job as long as Chris Rock and Dave Chappelle are writing jokes for him. Already set to perform are Green Day, Kanye West, and Kelly Clarkson. The Viewers Choice is still in the preliminary stages so if you would like to vote for that or the MTV2 Award, or Best Soundtrack From a Video Game, hop over to MTV.com and voice your oppinian. As for the nominees:
Video of the Year
Coldplay, "Speed of Sound"
Green Day, "Boulevard of Broken Dreams"
Gwen Stefani, "Hollaback Girl"
Kanye West, "Jesus Walks"
Snoop Dogg w/Pharrell, "Drop It Like It's Hot"
Who Should Win: Jesus Walks
Who Will Win: Jesus Walks
Should Have Been Nominated: Vertigo
Jesus Walks is the best video by far the best video on this list and MTV loves rap, so it looks like it’s Kanye’s year this year. Although MTV also loves Stefani as I think No Doubt has the highest winning percentage in VMA history. I find it odd that U2’s Vertigo was left off as Speed of Sound is just Coldplay playing in front of light show and Drop it Like it’s Hot really isn’t visually striking.
Best Male Video
50 Cent, "Candy Shop"
Beck, "E-Pro"
John Legend, "Ordinary People"
Kanye West, "Jesus Walks"
Usher, "Caught Up"
Who Should Win: Jesus Walks
Who Will Win: Jesus Walks
Should Have Been Nominated: John Mayer, Daughters
Kanye should take this one too, but E-Pro and Ordinary People are worthy contenders. Usher is so 2004 and 50 has gone way downhill since his mix-tape days
Best Female Video
Amerie, "1 Thing"
Gwen Stefani, "Hollaback Girl"
Kelly Clarkson, "Since U Been Gone"
Mariah Carey, "We Belong Together"
Shakira w/Alejandro Sanz, "La Tortura"
Who Should Win: Since U Been Gone
Who Will Win: Hollaback Girl
Should Have Been Nominated: Joss Stone, You Had Me
Personally, I’ll go with the video with a chick breaking stuff. That’s totally my form of entertainment. Plus throw in a blatent rip-off of the Yeah Yeah Yeah’s Maps and I’m set. I always find it interesting when a dude shows up in the best Female catergory. MTV always seems to throw one in every year.
Best Group Video
Black Eyed Peas, "Don't Phunk With My Heart"
Destiny's Child w/T.I & Lil' Wayne, "Soldier"
Green Day, "Boulevard of Broken Dreams"
The Killers, "Mr. Brightside"
U2, "Vertigo"
Who Should Win: Vertigo
Who Will Win: Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Should Have Been Nominated: Jimmy Eat World, Pain
The one thing that is hard to peg the winners so early with the VMA is that they tend to award those who show up. If U2 show up this year, they most likely take home this award. But since they weren’t nominated for the top prize, I’m thinking they turned down a performance and won’t show up and show Green Day win by default. I have already explained why I dislike Destiny’s Child’s Soldier (If You Know What I Mean), so I won’t go into that again.
Best Rap Video
Eminem, "Just Lose It"
The Game & 50 Cent, "Hate It or Love It"
Ludacris, "Number One Spot"
T.I., "You Don't Know Me"
Ying Tang Twins, "Wait (The Whisper Song)"
Who Should Win: Number One Spot
Who Will Win: Just Lose It
All these songs suck massively so I’ll give my award to the video that sports Slick Rick and Mini Me. It’s interesting to compare this award with Best Hip-Hop Video where are but Missy Elliot are quality rappers where the Best Rap Nominees only appeal to kids in Middle School. And as an added bonus, we get the Antoine Merriwether himself, T.I. to boot in this catergory.
Best R&B Video
Alicia Keys, "Karma"
Ciara w/Ludacris, "Oh"
John Legend, "Ordinary People"
Mariah Carey, "We Belong Together"
Usher w/Alicia Keys, "My Boo"
Who Should Win: Ordinary People
Who Will Win: My Boo
Ordinary People has heart, My Boo has the star power. If Alicia Key was to win, it should be for Karma instead, but the voters will kill two stars with one stone with hear song with Usher.
Best Hip-Hop Video
Common, "Go"
Kanye West, "Jesus Walks"
Missy Elliott w/Ciara & Fat Man Scoop, "Lose Control"
Nas w/ Olu Dara, "Bridging the Gap"
Snoop Dogg w/Pharrell, "Drop It Like It's Hot"
Who Should Win: Jesus Walks
Who Will Win: Drop it Like it’s Hot
Should Have Been Nominated: Mobb Deep, Got it Twisted
Sans Missy Elliot, all the videos are worthy. But I would have gone with Common’s The Corner rather than Go.
Best Dance Video
Ciara, "1, 2 Step"
Destiny's Child, "Lose My Breath"
Jennifer Lopez, "Get Right"
Missy Elliott w/Ciara & Fat Man Scoop, "Lose Control"
Shakira w/Alejandro Sanz, "La Tortura"
Who Should Win: La Tortura
Who Will Win: Lose My Breathe
Should Have Been Nominated: 1 Thing
Seriously, nothing beats the Shakira patented breast shake in her video. Aside from Destiny’s Child, I don’t know anyone who could actually dance to the other three nominees, so they should be thrown out by default. Amerie on the other hand is one of the few songs that could get me dancing.
Best Rock Video
Foo Fighters, "Best of You"
Green Day, "Boulevard of Broken Dreams"
The Killers, "Mr. Brightside"
My Chemical Romance, "Helena"
Weezer, "Beverly Hills"
Who Should Win: Mr. Brightside
Who Will Win: Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Should Have Been Nominated: Vertigo
For me it a toss up between Playmates and Eric Roberts, and you can see by my prediction who wins that battle. Too bad there is no Best Pseudo-Celebrity Cameo award so we can see Roberts take on himself with his other video with Mariah Carey.
Best Pop Video
Ashlee Simpson, "Pieces of Me"
Gwen Stefani, "Hollaback Girl"
Jesse McCartney, "Beautiful Soul"
Kelly Clarkson, "Since U Been Gone"
Lindsay Lohan, "Rumors"
Who Should Win: Since U Been Gone
Who Will Win: Hollaback Girl
Should Have Been Nominated: Vanessa Carlton, White Houses
They should really change this award to best Teen-Pop award because not many people above the age of twenty or male like any artist that MTV has thrown into this category. Pop is short for popular which means it should be something everybody likes, not just under-aged females. But enough for a semantics lesson, No Doubt has ruled this category in the past, so expect them to win. Simpson and Lohan are throwaway video, although Rumors has some nostalgia appeal since it harkens back to a day when Lohan actually was attractive. And should I even know who Jessie McCartney is? Is he related to Paul?
Best New Artist in a Video
Ciara, "1, 2 Step"
The Game, "Dreams"
John Legend, "Ordinary People"
The Killers, "Mr. Brightside"
My Chemical Romance, "Helena"
Who Should Win: Ordinary People
Who Will Win: Mr. Brightside
Should Have Been Nominated: Anna Nalick, Breathe (2 A.M.)
This is a two way battle because Ciara, the Game, and My Chemical Romance suck massively. Although if Best New Artist of the past are any indication, maybe I should root for one of the three instead.
MTV2 Award
Akon w/Styles P, "Locked Up"
The Bravery, "An Honest Mistake"
Daddy Yankee, "Gasolina"
Fall Out Boy, "Sugar, We're Going Down"
Mike Jones w/Slim Thug & Paul Wall, "Still Tippin'"
My Chemical Romance, "Helena"
Who I Voted For: Still Tippin'
Who Will Win: Helena
Remember the good old day when MV2 didn’t become a haven for all things frat boys? So what we get is an award to see who is most metro. And since MTV allows you to vote as many times as you want, the award doesn’t go to the most popular, rather it goes whoever fans are the biggest losers (think AFI). And since fans of My Chemical Romance have nothing better to do than sit in front of the computers and vote all day, they’ll win. Even though I hate blatant self promotion, Mike Jones is so over the top when he does it, it become entertaining.
Breakthrough Video
Eminem, "Mosh"
Gorillaz, "Feel Good Inc."
Missy Elliott w/Ciara & Fat Man Scoop, "Lose Control"
Sarah McLachlan, "World on Fire"
U2, "Vertigo"
Who Should Win: World on Fire
Who Will Win: Lose Control
Let play a little “Which One of These Videos is Not Like the Other.” If you said World on Fire, go get yourself a cookie. The breakthrough behind that video is that it only cost $15. McLachlan turned around and donated the $150,000 allotted to the video to various international charities. But I’m sure the charity will go unnoticed again as the video outlets ignored it when it initially came out.
Best Choreography in a Video
Amerie, "1 Thing"
Gwen Stefani, "Hollaback Girl"
Jennifer Lopez, "Get Right"
Missy Elliott w/Ciara & Fat Man Scoop, "Lose Control"
My Chemical Romance, "Helena"
Who Should Win: Helena
Who Will Win: Hollaback Girl
Should Have Been Nominated: Vanessa Carlton, White Houses
Stafani can’t dance, J-Lo gets a pity nomination because he album tanked, and the daning in 1 Thing and Lose Control weren’t even memorial. Helena should win by default.
Best Direction in a Video
Green Day, "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" (Director: Samuel Bayer)
Jennifer Lopez, "Get Right" (Director: Francis Lawrence/Diane Martel)
Missy Elliott w/Ciara & Fat Man Scoop, "Lose Control" (Director: Dave Meyers/Missy Elliott)
White Stripes, "Blue Orchid" (Director: Floria Sigismondi)
U2, "Vertigo" (Director: Alex & Martin)
Who Should Win: Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Who Will Win: Boulevard of Broken Dreams
I really have no comment on direction.
Best Special Effects in a Video
Coldplay, "Speed of Sound"
Gorillaz, "Feel Good Inc."
Ludacris, "Number One Spot"
The Mars Volta, "The Widow"
Missy Elliott w/Ciara & Fat Man Scoop, "Lose Control"
U2, "Vertigo"
Who Should Win: Vertigo
Who Will Win: Lose Control
I was unaware that there were any special effects in Speed of Sound. And the effects in Number One Spot and Feel Good Inc. were not that special. I’d give the U2 because unlike Missy Elliot, their music doesn’t make my ears bleed.
Best Art Direction in a Video
Green Day, "American Idiot"
Gwen Stefani, "What You Waiting For?"
The Killers, "Mr. Brightside"
System of a Down, "B.Y.O.B"
White Stripes, "Blue Orchid"
Who Should Win: Mr. Brightside
Who Will Win: What You Waiting For?
I have no comments on art direction.
Best Editing in a Video
Coldplay, "Speed of Sound"
Foo Fighters, "Best of You”
Green Day, "Boulevard of Broken Dreams"
Gwen Stefani, "What You Waiting For?"
Jennifer Lopez, "Get Right"
Simple Plan, "Untitled"
Who Should Win: Best of You
Who Will Win: What You Waiting For?
Editing is a hard category to choose because all you have to do is make sure the lips move with the words of the song. Untitled was a cool video, it just too sad that it was paired up with one of the worst songs of the year. Man those Canadians are a whiny bunch.
Best Cinematography in a Video
Coldplay, "Speed of Sound"
Green Day, "Boulevard of Broken Dreams"
Modest Mouse, "The Ocean Breathes Salty"
Simple Plan, "Untitled"
U2, "Vertigo"
White Stripes, "Blue Orchid"
Who Should Win: Speed of Sound
Who Will Win: Boulevard of Broken Dreams
I really shouldn’t comment here because I’m not entirely sure what cinematography is.
Best Soundtrack From A Video Game
Def Jam: Fight for NY
Dance Dance Revolution Extreme
Madden 2005
Midnight Club 3: Dub Edition
Tony Hawk’s Underground 2
Who I Voted For:: Def Jam: Fight for NY
Who Will Win: Tony Hawk's Underground 2
Should Have Been Nominated: Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
He in lies the biggest snub at the awards with that absence of GTA. OK, so no one on the soundtrack has been on MTV since Dr. Dre last appeared in an Eminem video. But unlike all the games on the list, when playing GTA, there is no need to reach for the remote to throw the mute on because you keep on hearing the same songs ad nausea.
It has been a couple of days since George Bush named his appointee to the Supreme Court to fill the vacancy of Sandra Day O’Conner. You most like been inundated with reasons why John Roberts Jr. is the greatest American ever born or the worst humanity has had to offer since, well, the guy who appointed him. Now that the blowhards have had their say, let you give me my opinion of Roberts: I don’t have one. And here is the problem with the current state of news today. The anchor sets up a topic then brings on two guests to “discuss” the topic, both with opposite extreme views. And at the end, we, the viewer, have to decide for ourselves which view we disagree with less. No one reports the news anymore, they prefer to create it. And anyone who keeps on brings up Roberts wife, stop it, they are not confirming his wife, they are confirming him. Granted this is almost poetic considering Bush’s people made John McCain’s wife out to be a crack addict in the 2000 primary, so what goes around always comes back around.
So in the end, this leaves me without a quality opinion on Roberts. Now this is what I would like to know about John Roberts, what are his thoughts on Eminent Domain? One thing that I do not want to happen to me is that the government to take away my home so they can build another outlet for the evil empire (Wal-Mart). Then and only then could I form an opinion about the judicial nominee. I know Eminent Domain it is not a hot topic of the day like abortion and the like, but here's the thing; I don’t really care if abortion is illegal or not. Nothing in my life would change if abortion was legal or not. Same thing with gay marriage – doesn’t affect me either way. I won’t wake up one morning, look at the headline on the paper that read “Gay Marriage Legalized,” and think to myself, “Darn, not I won’t be able to buy a house now.” Yet another thing that won’t affect me either way – flag burning. Of course that’s assuming that they don’t do the burning while in my home.
So Eminent Domain is something I hope senators will be bring up at the confirmation hearings in about six week. And hear in lies one of the biggest problems in America today, how slow it takes anything to get done. O’Conner announced her intent to retire about a month ago. Roberts wasn’t nominated until last week. Confirmation hearings are about six weeks away. And if everything goes swiftly, Roberts won’t be on the court until October at the earliest. That is almost a half a year it will take for us to get a new judge and that’s only if there are no problems. This should take no longer than month to able to push through.
In other Supreme Court news, recently when ask if or when he was going to retire, Chief Justice of Supreme Court, William Renquist replied, “That’s for me to know and you to find out.” It’s nice to know that our nation’s top judge is quoting PeeWee Herman. We really need to reevaluate that life term thing.
I was recently pointed in the direction of an extremely interesting trailer for the launch of Lost in Britain (You can check it out here). It was directed by David LaChapelle, so if you are familiar with him, you know it will be strange. And if you don’t know who he is, LaChapelle is responsible for Moby’s Natural Blues, Bink182’s Feeling This videos and the Burger King commercial featuring the dude from Hootie. And if you remember the Rolling Stone cover that started Brittney Spear not so innocent phase, David LaChapelle. But he has nothing to do with Rick James though. But back to Lost, since the file is quite big, I’ll give a play by play for the dial-up viewers.
First the ad is features a song by Portishead and the cast is located on the beach with the plane on fire in the background. The first shot focuses in on Hurley who is carrying luggage. Then we get a shot of Jin and Sun, Sayid and Shannon, and Boone and Claire dancing. Cut to Michael also carrying luggage backwards, but it looks extremely tired. Then we get Jack and Kate dancing and Charlie dancing by himself, and for Charlie, I use the term dancing loosely as it is possible he might be having a seizure. Then were are back to some of the couples dancing some more then on to Locke who looks like he’s conducting an orchestra. Cut to Michael cutting and dancing with Sun. Cut to Kate and Sawyer dancing then back to Locke conducting some more only this time he’s been joined by Walt. Then we get a stare down between Jack and Sawyer only to reveal Kate in-between them and then floats towards Jack (not literally floats but she defiantly looks high here). And now Sun is back with Jin and Kate with Sawyer. Then we get a bigger view with most of the cast and something explodes in the background. Then Clair is off by herself. Cut to Jin and Sun and Sayid and Shannon dancing then Charlie by himself. Another wide shot is next and Kate is back with Jack and Sawyer is wondering, looking at everyone else. Then we get a scene where it looks like Boone and Sayid are catching Shannon, possibly fighting over her. Cut to Kate walking backwards into the ocean and back to the regular couples dancing again and Jack and Hurley talking. Last we see Clair sitting in front of some burning wreckage.
Even though the ad was made for the first run of the show in Britain, I can’t help but think that it has some foreshadowing for the upcoming season two here in the U.S. The first thing that struck me the coupling of Boone and Claire. Why isn’t Claire with Charlie? She really didn’t have any interaction with Boone in the first season and probably won’t in the second on account of Boone’s death. Although, that does help two theories that I currently have, 1) Claire dies and 2) Boone (and everyone else who died is) what’s in the hatch. The ending with Claire in front of the fire also helps my Claire dies theory. It was also interesting that Michael and Walt do not interact. With Walt and Locke conducting, one can assume that they are controlling what happens on the island. More specifically, I believe that Walt is the key to controlling the monster.
In American commercial news for Lost, there is a hidden ad on the Oceanic Air website (granted I bypassed the absurdity and just downloaded it from another website). All the pictures and sounds are from the last season, but the text that goes across the screen is interesting:
They survived on luck.
They survived on instinct.
But on the other side of the island…
They will discover…
They’re not the survivors.
They’re NOT the survivors. (Repeat that a couple more times)
They’re not the survivors they thought they were.
Ok, I’ve already concluded that Rose’s husband and Ana Lucia are on the other side of the island and it just so happens that is where Michael, Jin, and Sawyer end up. What I’m lost on (get it lost, oh never mind) is why they are not the survivors they thought they were? On the other side of the island, do they have people dissing them on the internet (even though their momma should have taught them better than that)? Does everyone have the eye of the tiger? Do they have to put up with a naked, fat, gay-homosexual walking around all of the time? I just don’t know. But the biggest question is, could they possibly have a hotter token hot chick on their side of the island? The second season of lost can’t start soon enough for me. (Check out my review of season 1 here - Guys (Dramatic Pause) Where are We?)
I mentioned a while back that Kanye West’s remix (with Jay-Z) to the song Diamond (From Sierra Leone) and how it talked about the atrocities that happen just to bring your bling to the US (Throw Up Your Diamonds Like You’re Bulimic). If you haven’t read that already, I highly recommend it. Also if you were interesting to hear the song for yourself, the remix is now currently available on iTunes. I can’t recommend this song enough.
After week of doing insane stunk after insane stunt, Tom Cruise have finally did something of importance, he pissed off the French. It was reported recently the Cruise is no long welcome in the country. Welcome back to humanity Tom.
There was a lot of backlash with John McCain appearing in the R-rated movie, Wedding Crashers with Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson. One reporter even printed a title reading “Sen. McCain stars in ‘boob raunch fest.’” McCain responded by saying, “In Washington, I work with boobs everyday.” He even seemed more upset that he appeared in the same movie as James Carville than with a bunch of boobs. So all the prudes out there that think this is a bad thing, relax, and go see the movie because it’s hilarious. Not to mention, McCain gave his entire paycheck from the film to charity.
Speaking of boob raunch fest, it looks like Mike Tyson is looking at getting into porn. He has already contacted Jenna Jemison’s production company. Just when you think Tyson couldn’t get any more entertaining, he always seems to out do himself.
Much like me, it seems like the original Cooter from Dukes of Hazzard wants you to boycott the new movie. Now I think people should boycott the movie because it doesn’t star John Schneider and Tom Wopat. Cooter on the other hand doen’t want people to see it because Hollywood is sleezing up a “family show.” I was unaware that rasist imagry, short shorts, and dudes named Cooter qualify as family entertainment. Does he even know what Cooter means? But it looks like family values to Cooter (at right) is having girls that could be you daughter rub up against you.
It appears that Hilary 2008 is in full swing when the Senator attacked Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas for having a hidden scene with a naked woman. So let me get this straight, in the Clinton household, dudes blowing each other up with rocket launchers – O.K. Naked pixilated women – bad.
Weird search of the week:
arab chick stereotypes forums (AOL)
Here are the results of the Live 8 Lyrics Quiz that were not guessed:
13. She couldn’t afford a car so she named her daughter Alexis. (All Falls Down – Kanye West)
18. I can’t wait for the first time. My imagination is running wild. (You Don’t Know My Name – Alicia Keys)
20. You’re talking so much sex, but you’re not telling us about AIDS. (It Takes More – Ms. Dynamite)
23. She said her name was Donnie but her shirt said Marie. (Then She Bit Me – DJ Jazzy Jeff & the Fresh Prince)
Congratulations to Pure Mood for make the most correct answers (4). Since this was fairly successful, I will be bringing back a new lyrics quiz with a new theme on the 15th of every month. I have also put up a winner’s circle in the margin so be sure to come back each month (or just come back everyday) to try your hand at the new lyrics quiz.
A wise man once said
That, “A Change is Gonna Come”
Let’s prove Sam Cooke right.
The ladies over at Digitally Essential are holding a contest to win a free blog design. I do like the whole earth tone vibe the current template has, but recently, I had an idea to put a golf themed banner at the top and go with more of a grassy type background. I was also toying with the idea of adding another margin on the right side and I’ve also wanted proper headers for the sections in the margin. Unfortunately Haikus have never been my strength, as the contest requires. As my long time readers know, I tend to write quite lengthy entries so writing something that only has 17 syllables would not be easy for me. I thought about asking Mr. Slice, who has been churning out Haikus regularly recently. Then I realized one of my favorite sayings, “A wise man once said” was exactly 5 syllables, and one of my favorite songs, “A Change is Gonna Come” was 6, I figured the rest was easy, so I decided to though my hat into the ring. Contest ends tomorrow for anyone else who want to give it a try. I’m not sure how long the judges will deliberate, but if things go my way, you may see some extra maintained to the 9th green. Maybe I’ll even change the pin location, throw in a bunker, and try to Tiger-proof it too, not that it’s possible.
Riding the wave of the Garden State Soundtrack a year too late is Marjorie Fair. With its melodic beats and soothing voices, any song off their first album, Self Help Serenade, would have fit well in the Zach Braff film. The band also has a strong retro-pop vibe and at times on the album conjures up thoughts of breezy 70’s bands like Supertramp and Seals & Croft.
An album like this is very hard to review because it is so mellow, you just space out and it’s over before you know it. The group itself finds it hard to classify as lead singer, Evan Slamka tried to explain, “If I'm bored or doing some psycho-therapy on myself, I'll maybe look through the lens of the record and try to figure out what it's about, what it means.” I think I even zoned out when I first read that.
And like artist on the Garden State Soundtrack, a lot of the lyrics are introspective. On the stand out track, Empty Room, Slamka sings, “I don’t want to die young. But if I do, fill my empty room with the sun.” Even gloomier is Waves where he mourns, “The person I thought I was, is something that I don’t thing is coming true.” So if obsess over Garden State, Self Help Serenade is right up your alley.
Song to Download – Empty Room
Self Help Serenade gets a ![Terror Alert Level: Elevated [YELLOW]](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6-iVFV0hXCTSYP16K_V0Rrxp3GqFrtBIJKeTUyQ2LpxZQ9XKHFj6QGtqqa7oxhLadLV8vUj8R84AftD8IKUSfN0u_u0CYDtJwhrpCPN2DBWquAIDv0jbVlhZL0mDFKlPKluGyxw/s400/small_elevated.png)
on my Terror Alert Scale.
Today’s big new is that Northwestern Women’s Lacrosse team wore flip flops to the White House. Apparently the blow hards think this was disrespectful to the integrity of the building. But let’s be honest, the integrity of the White House has been ruined by the people who have inhabited it for the last 13 years. They have done more to discredit the honor of the White House more than any flip-flops could. It also seems appropriate that flip-flops would be worn in the White House (get it, flip flops and politicians, oh never mind). It’s also good to hear about articles of clothing in the White House that didn’t have, um, never mind, I won’t go there.
What I’m outraged about is when does winning the Women’s Lacrosse College National Championship warrant a visit to the White House? I guess the local T-ball champions should save up their allowances because it looks like anyone who has won anything can get a picture with the president as long as they have airfare to get to Washington. I mean it’s not like the guy is busy with wars, finding a new Supreme Court judge, White House leaks, hating gays, ignoring our borders, and social security. Wait, what happened to social security? Did that get scrapped?
But it looks like this story will have a happy ending. The offending players are planning to action off the infamous footwear with all the money raised going to a fund to help a 10 year old girl with a brain tumor.
ESPY Awards were on last night although if you have visited ESPN.com lately, then you were bombarded with articles about the winners, best dressed and all that goes with the awards since the awards show was actually last week sometimes. I really hate that not only are they not live, but they let out all the secrets before it airs and for those of us that don’t want anything spoiled, we have to be very careful at what we look at. But anyways, here are my highlights from the festivities:
- In the opening “Images” montage it mentioned the major athletes that have retired this year including Emmett Smith. I seriously missed that announcement, I guess I never though that he would retire. I fully expected him to be the Ricky Henderson of football.
- Also in the opening montage was multiple Ron Artest sightings which made me wonder why they don’t have “Worst Sports Moment” award.
- Dwayne Wade wins the Breakthrough Athlete award. They might have as well given the award to Shaq, because without him in Miami, Wade is just another decent player with no personality. I’m sure if guys would have known what Maria Sharapova would have been wearing, the voting might have gone a different way. That dress catapulted her over Anna Kournikova in the hotness ranking.
- It makes sense that Jessica Biel was a presenter at the ESPY’s because she is built like a linebacker.
- I have to admit I was totally conned by the Hoosiers 2 bit. I extremely mad when Amare Stoudemire and (um, was I supposed to know who the other dude was?) introduced the film. Luckily it was just a joke but I wouldn’t be surprised if there is a remake the way Hollywood is pumping out recycled ideas. (FYI – next up in the remake department, and sadly this isn’t a joke, LL Cool J in Fatal Attraction.)
- Nothing say “Know way I’m seeing this” like hearing a movie is starring Tyrese, the weird dude from OutKast, some random dude, and Marky Mark. But somehow this makes them eligible to be presenters. I haven’t looked, but I’d put sizeable money that their movie is being distributed by one of Disney subsidiaries. And if you are unaware, ESPN is one of them.
- It was funny during the Best Coach montage that all the coaches had elaborate plays filled with X’s and O’s to go along with their part and Terry Francona’s bit was just a steal. If any baseball manager wins this award, there is a serious problem.
- Natalie Coughlin was robbed as the Best Female Olympic Performance went to the USA Softball Team. It wasn’t the Best Females Olympic Performances, so a team shouldn’t even have been eligible. Shame on anyone who voted for them.
- Maria Sharapova wins Best Female Tennis Player yet we don’t get to see her accept it as it was thrown in with the awards previously given out montage. Bad mistake as ESPN once again screwed its make demographic another shot of her in that dress.
- Holy Carly Patterson sighting! It might just been the camera angle, but it sure looked like she has packed on the pounds since last August. I guess that’s what happens when you are allowed to eat for the first time in your life. But she may want to slow down or she just might find herself on Celbrity Fit Club 3.
- The Spelling Bee bit rivels anything Vince Vaugn has done on the MTV Movie Awards. “Spell Sharapova.” “Can you use it in a sentence?” “I would like to go on a date with Maria Sharapova.”
- Can some one tell how Wilmer Vanderama got so lucky? First he dates a barely legal Mandy Moore, then he lands the not so legal Lindsey Lohan before she got ugly, now he’s presenting with Maria Sharapova. And he’s not on an ABC show nor does he have a Disney venture to promote. I really need to find out how to become Ashton Kutcher’s sidekick.
- Next up is the best segment on any awards show, The Arthur Ashe Award, given this year to Jim McLaren, a Yale football star who was pronounced dead after being hit by a bus. But he recovered and set multiple records for a one legged athlete only to be hit by a van while riding a bike in a triathlon and was told by doctors he would not be able to feel or move anything below his head ever again. The awards was also givin to a man who was inspired by McLaren, Emmanuel Ofosu Yeboah who was born without a bone in his leg in Ghana, a country where disabled children are routinely killed at birth. Yeboah went on to ride a bike across his home country, 370 miles, on a bike that was donated by a program that was inspired by McLaren. The highlight of the segment came when originally diagnosed paraplegic, McLaren, was seen wiping away his tears with his own hands while accepting the award in front of a stand ovation.
- There was a Monday Night Football reunion between Terrel Owens and Nicollette Sheridan. For those keeping track at home she joined Patrick Dempsey (Grey’s Anatomy), Michael Vartan (Alias), James Denton (Desperate Housewives), Nick and Jessica (Nick and Jessica's Tour of Duty), and Kelly Preston (Sky High) as blatant Disney product placement at the ESPY’s. I’m sure if you look at the other actors at the awards you will also find they are Disney products. Yet surprisingly no one from Lost made an appearance. Could they not at least brought in the token hot chick from the show.
- Blake Hoffarber won the Best Play award. I don’t want to tell Mr. Slice I told you so (although just by typing it I think I just did. Sorry.)
- Friday Night Lights wins Best Sports Movie, the director picked up the trophy but when you’re dating Estella Warren, that’s really award enough.
- It seems like The Rock will be soon dropped from his name as he is starting to be introduced as Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. Bad move as The Rock sound much cooler than Dwayne. Dwayne always conjures images of Dwayne Wayne and his flip glasses. This is a potential career killer. Granted this affect Wayne Wade marking ability much worse.
- The night closes with a perforce by Destiny’s Child with some weird Riverdance type chorography. This just may give us an insight in the post-Destiny’s Child careers on the two members of the group not named Beyoncé as they soon may be Michael Flattley’s sidekicks.
Final Scooter Talley:
Voted For: 6 for 17 (.353)
Predicted Correctly: 7 for 17 (.412)
With the return of hockey, I have a few suggestions.
1. Get Rid of the Blue Lines – This is a rule that everyone who plays EA's NHL Series turns off immediately because it is extremely annoying and in real life slows down the game to a grinding halt either because some one violated the rule or a team holds the puck while avoiding the infraction. Basically all this rule does is award teams that are to lazy to guard players.
2. Get rid of all teams below St. Louis – Who ever though that people would fans would want to watch the Stanley Cup in June when they could be going to the beach is a moron. Why would anyone want to watch hockey in place where they would never see ice outside ever in their lifetime? Some team should just be eliminated because there are way too many to begin with. Basically the Southeast and Pacific divisions both should be dissolved. Although some teams should be moved back to their original homes for instance move the Carolina Hurricanes back to Hartford where people actually play hockey.
3. Shorten the Season and Playoffs – Even places where there are not any beaches don’t want to see hockey in June, or May for that matter. Shorten the season by about 20 games and go with a best of 5-5-7 system for the playoffs. That should shave a month and a half to two months off the season
4. Bring Back the Old Divisions – Back in 93, the NHL decided to change the unique named divisions and conferences to bland geographically correct names. By doing this, the NHL lost some mystic and history and became like all the sports. They should really changes those back to the Norris, Smyth, Adams, Patrick Divisions and the Clarence Campbell and Prince of Wales Conferences.
5. Lower Ticket Prices – The best way to build the league up again is to make it the only sport in town where families can see professional sports without breaking the back or postpone the trip 
to Disneyworld. Have the good seats sell for around $15 and $5 for the nosebleed and watch the fans come back in droves.
Most importantly, the NHL owners and NHLPA need to fire Gary Bettman and Bob Goodenow. Both are the faces and names most associated with the 2004-5 lost season and the best PR move is just to cut ties with both men. If fact they should make it a public firing at the first game of the upcoming season and televised on ESPN. You can even make a prize out of it and let two lucky fans to the honors.
An interesting poll I found up on ESPN today (Rank 'Em: Where does the NHL fit?) giving the readers to rank the major, and some not so major, sports. Here is the current list:
1. NFL
2. MLB
3. College Football
4. NHL
5. NBA
6. College Basketball
7. Golf
8. Soccer
9. Tennis
10. Auto Racing
11. Boxing
12. Action Sports
13. Horse Racing
14. Softball
15. Bowling
16. WNBA
The biggest shock is how high hockey is even higher than basketball. David Stern can’t be happy with this and I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Gary Bettman wakes up with a horses head in his bed sometime soon. Another shocker is that, even with all the Danica Patrick hoopla, auto racing is still ranked behind tennis and soccer. I keep hearing with the lack of the NHL, NASCAR would leap into the big four of major sports. I guess one could make an argument that your average NASCAR fan isn’t smart enough to vote on something that involves logging onto the internet, or wouldn’t have internet in the first place. But I will take the high road and not insult NASCAR fans like that. Granted, just mentioning, I guess in a way, is pot-shot at them. Oh, well. It’s not like they can get on the internet to read this anyways. Hear is how I rank the sports.
1. NFL – Coming from northeast Ohio, the Browns are a lifelong obsession for me and everyone around me. Seriously, where else are fans so obsessive that when they lose their team they riot to the point that they get their team back with the history and everything in tact. I even deny that the years 1996-1999 even existed. There was just a disturbance in the time-space continuum.
2. MLB – I grew up with one of the most feudal baseball team ever, the Indians and I was fine with that. As a kid, my family could go up to the Mistake by the Lake and walk up that day and get good tickets for cheap. The team even spawned on of the greatest sports movie ever, Major League. But unfortunately, the Tribe actually got good and moved into a much smaller stadium and it was impossible to get tickets and if you did, it cost an arm and a leg. So I switch over to rooting for the Astros because I became extremely bitter towards all the Fairweather Johnsons that popped up at the time. But I still make it to the local AA game a couple times a season because nothing beats a ballpark frank.
3. College Basketball – This is high solely because it hosts the greatest postseason even of all the sports, March Madness. Unfortunately the sport has been watered down as all the would be college stars are currently riding the pine in the NBA, but hopefully that will change with the new age restriction.
4. Soccer – The sport of my youth and World Cup soccer (men’s and women’s) is the best stand alone tournament of any sport. I’m glued to the couch whenever they roll around.
5. NHL – When the NHL comes back, it will poised to jump college basketball and soccer if they make some changes, and the closer the NHL becomes to Olympic hockey, the better.
6. Tennis – I have always loved to play tennis but watching professional tennis has become extremely boring lately because the athletes (and equipment for that matter) have become too good. Way too many aces and not enough long volleys to peak my interest for very long.
7.NBA – Much like college basketball, the quality of play has decreased because the players that should be college stars are mediocre NBA players at best. But unlike college, the NBA playoffs drag on forever. The rounds are too long and there is too much time in between playoff games, so by the time the finals roll around no one cares because they are bored with the winter sport and baseball is in full swing.
8. Boxing – How have the mighty have fallen. The biggest problem with boxing is that it got too big headed. They took it off free television and expected that people would drop $50 every couple weeks for a fight. Now it’s hard to find a sports fan that can name even one title holder. They could easily revive the sport if they start putting “marquee” bouts on free TV again.
9. Golf – Love to play it, fall asleep while watching it.
10. Action Sports – Some what of a broad category but some of thing those dudes (and chick) do are pretty cool like the dude last week who jumped the Great Wall of China.
11. College Football – Never understood the popularity of college football especially among those who have never went to that college or even live in that college town. My dislike of college football most likely stems from going to a college that never had a winning season while I was there. Of course that’s why God gave us NCAA Football so we can have Kent State beat up on Ohio State.
12. Bowling – Much like golf, like to play it, but massively boring to watch.
13. Softball – This is saved from last place solely because of Jennie Finch.
14. WNBA – Kind of like Softball but without Jennie Finch.
15. Horse Racing – They are animals; so essentially, I really could care less about them.
16. Auto Racing – People turning left for hours at a time, the smell of exhaust, the Doppler Effect, the instant loss of IQ points. I think I’ll pass. To be honest, if I could, I’d put badminton, paint ball, cricket, midget tossing, fake wrestling, tee ball, bicycling, Curling, flag football, spelling bees, laser tag, ballroom dancing, bull fighting, poker, bobsledding, and the heavyweight division of naked twister above auto racing.
The Emmy’s were announced today and even though it pales in comparison to the STA’s (c’mon, it doesn’t even have a Hottest Token Hot Chick Category). I’ll go ahead and toss out my predictions.
Outstanding Animated Program (for Programming Less Than One Hour)
Family Guy - FOX
Samurai Jack - Cartoon Network
The Simpsons - FOX
South Park - Comedy Central
SpongeBob SquarePants - Nickelodeon
Who will win: The Simpsons
Who should win: The Simpsons
The problem with Family Guy is that it’s all about the gags in-between a weak plot, so The Simpsons who week in and week out produce good show gets the nod over South Park which has been spotty in recent seasons.
Outstanding Animated Program (for Programming One Hour Or More)
Dragons: A Fantasy Made Real I - Animal Planet
Star Wars Clone Wars Vol. 2 (Chapters 21-25) - Cartoon Network
Who will win: Star Wars Clone Wars Vol. 2 (Chapters 21-25)
Who should win: Star Wars Clone Wars Vol. 2 (Chapters 21-25)
Wow, only two nominees. Maybe they should make the cut off a half an hour. Oddly enough they consider Chapters 21-25 one entity instead of individual episodes.
Outstanding Commercial
Applause - Budweiser
Drink Up - Aquafina
Glen - Starbucks Doubleshot
The One Campaign - One.org
Surprise Dinner - Ameriquest Mortgage
Who will win: - The One Campaign - One.org
Who should win: Glen - Starbucks Doubleshot
Should have been nominated: Wonderful Tonight - SBC
The One Campaign is a cool stylish ad with a good message, but when I first saw the Glen commercial, I fell off my chair laughing. I’m sure you remember this one with a Survivor knock off band following around some dude, presumably named Glen, replacing the Eye of the Tiger with Glen’s name. The current Starbucks commercial out right now with Hank being followed like a college basketball team to the sounds of Gary Glitter’s Rock and Roll part 2 is actually better but most likely not eligible because it’s new. Wonderful Tonight is much better than some of the others on the list.
Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series
Jason Bateman as Michael Bluth - Arrested Development - FOX
Ray Romano as Ray Barone - Everybody Loves Raymond - CBS
Tony Shalhoub as Adrian Monk - Monk - USA
Zach Braff as John “J.D.” Dorian - Scrubs - NBC
Eric McCormack as Will Truman - Will & Grace – NBC
Who will win: Ray Romano
Who should win: Jason Bateman
Nothing say awards sweep like the season, so you will see “Raymond” multiple times on Emmy night but Bateman on Arrested Development is much funnier. And is Will & Grace still on the air?
Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
James Spader as Alan Shore - Boston Legal - ABC
Ian McShane as Al Swearengen - Deadwood - HBO
Hugh Laurie as Dr. Gregory House - House - FOX
Hank Azaria as Dr. Craig “Huff” Huffstodt - Huff - Showtime
Kiefer Sutherland as Jack Bauer - 24 - FOX
Who will win: Ian McShane
Who should win: don’t care
Should have been nominated: Denis Leary
I don’t watch any of the shows nominated which goes to show that the Emmy voters are morons. McShane will win only because the Emmy’s are obsessed with HBO and without the Soprano’s, the other HBO show will win here. Leary performance on Rescue Me all season was thoroughly solid and deserved a nod, but I might be bias here considering I memorized No Cure for Cancer in college.
Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series
Marcia Cross as Bree Van De Camp - Desperate Housewives - ABC
Teri Hatcher as Susan Mayer - Desperate Housewives - ABC
Felicity Huffman as Lynette Scavo - Desperate Housewives - ABC
Patricia Heaton as Debra Barone - Everybody Loves Raymond - CBS
Jane Kaczmarek as Lois - Malcolm in the Middle – FOX
Who will win: Patricia Heaton
Who should win: Teri Hatcher
Should have been nominated: Eva Longoria
Heaton will win for two reasons: she’s part of the Raymond farewell tour and the Emmy like to distance themselves from the Golden Globes, thus no Desperate Housewives love. Speaking of Desperate Housewives, they left off the best actress on the show, Longoria. Without her, no one would be watching that show (and by no one, I mean men). Plus her debacles with the lawn boy are a lot funnier than Susan’s outrageous gag of the week.
Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series
Jennifer Garner as Sydney Bristow - Alias - ABC
Mariska Hargitay as Detective Olivia Benson - Law & Order: Special Victims Unit - NBC
Patricia Arquette as Allison Dubois - Medium - NBC
Glenn Close as Capt. Monica Rawling - The Shield - FX
Frances Conroy as Ruth Fisher - Six Feet Under – HBO
Who will win: Glenn Close
Who should win: Jennifer Garner
Who should have been nominated: Kristen Bell
Another category I could care less about. Alias is the only show I watched but apparently the Emmy voters can’t spot Garner’s stunt double as easily as normal people because that’s where the real acting for Sydney Bristow takes place. It’s sad that the voter ignored the under-thirty crowd missing great performances by Evangeline Lily of Lost, Amber Tamblyn of Joan of Arcadia, and the woman who should have won, Kristen Bell of Veronica Mars. I’d even take Brittany Snow of American Dreams or Emily van Camp of Everwood over any of the current nominees.
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series
Jeffrey Tambor as George Bluth Sr. - Arrested Development - FOX
Jeremy Piven as Ari Jacobs - Entourage - HBO
Peter Boyle as Frank Barone - Everybody Loves Raymond - CBS
Brad Garrett as Robert Barone - Everybody Loves Raymond - CBS
Sean Hayes as Jack McFarland - Will & Grace – NBC
Who will win: Brad Garrett
Who should win: Jeffrey Tambor
Should have been nominated: Ricardo Chavira
Every time George Sr. (or Oscar, who is mentioned in the nomination) appears on screen I end up on the floor laughing, but sadly one of Raymond’s relatives will walk away with the award. Carlos Solis was overlook as his hatred is just as entertaining as his wife’s infidelity. But seriously, is Will & Grace still on the air?
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
William Shatner as Denny Crane - Boston Legal - ABC
Oliver Platt as Russell Tupper - Huff - Showtime
Naveen Andrews as Sayid - Lost - ABC
Terry O’Quinn as John Locke - Lost - ABC
Alan Alda as Senator Arnold Vinick - The West Wing - NBC
Who will win: Alan Alda
Who should win: Terry O’Quinn
Should have been nominated: Enrico Colantoni
I would make the argument that O’Quinn should have been included in the Lead category as his character has become as big as Jack’s in the second half of the season. I also would have chosen Sawyer over Sayid, but this is Hollywood’s way to say “We love Iraqis.” But the only problem is that Andrews is Indian, not Iraqi. Colantoni was great as papa Mars, especially whenever he uttered the phrase, “Who’s your daddy?” to Veronica. But more importantly, where’s my homie, Ice-T?
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series
Jessica Walter as Lucille Bluth - Arrested Development - FOX
Doris Roberts as Marie Barone - Everybody Loves Raymond - CBS
Holland Taylor as Evelyn Harper - Two And A Half Men - CBS
Conchata Ferrell as Berta - Two And A Half Men - CBS
Megan Mullally as Karen Walker - Will & Grace – NBC
Who will win: Doris Roberts
Who should win: Jessica Walter
It’s odd that the only nominations Two and a Half Men get are in the female category. I didn’t even know there were women on the show. Mrs. Bluth is just a funny as her TV husband, but again Raymond’s mom will take it. Honestly, I hate Raymond and glad he’s leaving.
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series
Sandra Oh as Cristina - Grey’s Anatomy - ABC
Blythe Danner as Izzy Huffstodt - Huff - Showtime
Tyne Daly as Maxine Gray - Judging Amy - CBS
CCH Pounder as Det. Claudette Wyms - The Shield - FX
Stockard Channing as Abigail Bartlet - The West Wing – NBC
Who will win: Stockard Channing
Who should win: Blythe Danner
Should be nominated: Maggie Grace
Just like lead actress, the Emmy goes for “Name” actress apposed to those who deserve it. Amanda Seyfried of Veronica Mars, Sarah Drew of Everwood, Allison Mack of Smallville, as well as Hottest Token Hot Chick winner, Maggie Grace should be recognized.
Outstanding Guest Actor in a Comedy Series
Fred Willard as Hank - Everybody Loves Raymond - CBS
Victor Garber as Peter Bovington - Will & Grace - NBC
Jeff Goldblum as Frank/Scott - Will & Grace - NBC
Bobby Cannavale as Vince - Will & Grace - NBC
Alec Baldwin as Malcolm - Will & Grace – NBC
Who will win: Fred Willard
Who should win: Victor Garber
Should have been nominated: Shaft
Have no idea how a show that isn’t even on TV anymore (at least I don’t think it is) can get four nominations yet Shaft and Bob Newhart’s appearances on Desperate Housewives don’t get any love. Granted seeing Jack Bristow playing a gay homosexual was hilarious, but I swear that episode was on two-three years ago. Also Ben Stiller on Arrested Development should have replaced one of the Will & Grace nods and Ed Begley Jr. as the eye brow-less rival to George Sr..
Outstanding Guest Actor in a Drama Series
Red Buttons as Mr. Rubadoux - ER - NBC
Ray Liotta as Charlie Metcalf - ER - NBC
Ossie Davis as Melvin Porter - The L Word - Showtime
Charles Durning as Ernie Yost - NCIS - CBS
Martin Landau as Frank Malone - Without A Trace – CBS
Who will win: Ray Liotta
Who should win: Red Buttons
Should have been nominated: James Earl Jones
Jones’ spot should have been recognized. The dude who played Arntz on lost should have been up there too. And what about the Termanator (v.2) not being nominated for Lost?
Outstanding Guest Actress in a Comedy Series
Kathryn Joosten as Mrs. McClusky - Desperate Housewives - ABC
Lupe Ontiveros as Juanita Solis - Desperate Housewives - ABC
Georgia Engel as Pat - Everybody Loves Raymond - CBS
Cloris Leachman as Ida - Malcolm In The Middle - FOX
Blythe Danner as Marilyn Truman - Will & Grace – NBC
Who will win: Cloris Leachman
Who should win: Lupe Ontiveros
Should have been nominated: Christine Taylor
I do love those Solises. Arrested Development again was sadly overlooked in the guest acting category.
Outstanding Guest Actress in a Drama Series
Swoosie Kurtz as Madeline Sullivan - Huff - Showtime
Cloris Leachman as Aunt Olive - Joan Of Arcadia - CBS
Amanda Plummer as Miranda Cole - Law & Order: Special Victims Unit - NBC
Angela Lansbury as Eleanor Duvall - Law & Order: Special Victims Unit/Trial By Jury - NBC
Jill Clayburgh as Bobbie Broderick - Nip/Tuck – FX
Who will win: Angela Lansbury
Who should win: Cloris Leachman
Should have been nominated: Patricia Velasquez
Velasquez as Franco’s baby momma was one of the more memorial performances in recent memory. And what about the chick from Happy Gilmore not being nominated for Lost?
Outstanding Individual Performance in a Variety or Music Program
The Daily Show With Jon Stewart - Comedy Central - Jon Stewart, Host
The Tonight Show With Jay Leno - NBC - Jay Leno, Host
58th Annual Tony Awards (2004) - CBS Hugh Jackman, Host
Tracey Ullman Live & Exposed - HBO - Tracey Ullman, Performer
Whoopi Back To Broadway - The 20th Anniversary - HBO - Woopi Goldberg, Performer
Who will win: Jon Stewart
Who should win: Jon Stewart
Should have been nominated: David Letterman
One of the bigger crimes against humanity is suggesting that Leno is better than Letterman. This discredits and credibility the Emmy’s had. If Leno actually wins, some one needs to die a horrible death because of it.
Outstanding Comedy Series
Arrested Development - FOX
Desperate Housewives - ABC
Everybody Loves Raymond - CBS
Scrubs - NBC
Will & Grace - NBC
Who will win: Everyone Loves Raymond
Who Should Win: Arrested Development
I still missed the memo on why Desperate Housewives is a comedy because the reasons everyone comes back each week is because of the drama elements. But then again, they are not winning anyways. I’m still convinced that there were no new Will & Grace episodes this season.
Outstanding Drama Series
Deadwood - HBO
Lost - ABC
Six Feet Under - HBO
24 - FOX
The West Wing - NBC
Who will win: Deadwood
Who should win: Lost
Should have been nominated: Veronica Mars
Nothing says Emmy winner than lots of vulgarity and blood. And I thought storytelling should be the litmus test for a good show, but anyways. What should be here is the best show in production right now, Veronica Mars.
Outstanding Variety, Music or Comedy Series
Da Ali G Show - HBO
The Daily Show With Jon Stewart – Comedy Central
Late Night With Conan O’Brien - NBC
Late Show With David Letterman - CBS
Real Time With Bill Maher - HBO
Who will win: The Daily Show With Jon Stewart
Who should win: Late Show with David Letterman
Should have been nominated – Pardon the Interruption
No love for ESPN as PTI is the most entertaining show on today. Unless it is considered daytime, then forget that gripe (At least until it is forgotten on the Daytime Emmy Awards). Letterman was rightfully nominated over Leno in this category, so no heads will roll.
Outstanding Nonfiction Special
Beyond The Da Vinci Code - The History Channel
Cary Grant: A Class Apart - TCM
Inside The Actors Studio: 10th Anniversary Special
Live From New York: The First Five Years Of Saturday Night Live - NBC
Unforgivable Blackness: The Rise And Fall Of Jack Johnson - PBS
Just wanted to give some love to Unforgivable Blackness: The Rise And Fall Of Jack Johnson as it was one of the most entertain shows on TV this past year.
Outstanding Reality Program
Antiques Roadshow - PBS
Extreme Makeover: Home Edition - ABC
Penn & Teller: (Expletive Deleted)! - Showtime
Project Greenlight - Bravo
Queer Eye For The Straight Guy - Bravo
Who will win: Queer Eye For The Straight Guy
Who should win: Project Greenlight
Should have been nominated: Made
The Emmy’s love gay homosexuals as seen by the multiple nominations for a gay show that isn’t on anymore (I’m convinced Will & Grace got canceled a while ago) even though Project Greenlight was solid every week. MTV’s Made is a great show that I’ll save my explanation why for a later post.
Outstanding Reality-Competition Program
The Amazing Race - CBS
American Idol - FOX
The Apprentice - NBC
Project Runway - Bravo
Survivor - CBS
Who will Win: The Amazing Race
Who should win: Survivor
If American Karaoke wins there is something seriously wrong with the Emmy’s. Well as a wise man once said, “I tried to think of something deep to say, but my well is dripping dry today.” So I’ll just stop there and not get into best hairdressing, editing, miniseries and so one. There are way too many awards at all these awards shows.
The second half of baseball starts tomorrow, so what better time to give a mid-season assessment. The biggest story of the first half has been the lack of Big Head Barry. And for me that is a good thing. Just hang up the cleats, the clear, and the cream full time Barry, the game is doing good without you humongous dome. But without Big Head Barry playing everyday, there isn’t much to make fun of through-out the course the first half. Luckily Kenny Rogers quickly became a great public enemy #2 recently. First he has to miss a start after getting into a fight with a water cooler. Then after getting mocked for that, decided to pick a fight with a camera man. An old and concededly smaller camera man. But a least he put up a better fight than the water cooler. I wonder what exactly the camera man said to Rogers. “You’re my lady?” “You got to know when to hold them?” And for everyone who was against Rogers pitching in the All-Star game was proven wrong yesterday. First the announcer actually paused to give the fans extra time to boo him. Then Chipper Jones tattooed him to start a NL run. Not to mention he had to answer questions from the hated media the last couple days.
As for my boy the Astros, after a slow start, they have got hot lately. Sound familiar? In fact, the Astros are one game better than they were last year. But unfortunately Carlos Beltran won’t be helping out this year. And they can’t rely on the Cubs choking again because they choked early this year. Although if Brandon Backe can throw together a few solid starts in a row, get one more bat, and actually win on the road (the start the second half with a long road trip starting in St. Louis) Houston could get the wild card again this season.
The International Olympic Committee also made baseball news over the All-Star break by announcing they are dropping baseball and softball from the games. Now I sick of all the pervs complaining that won’t be able to see Jennie Finch, but softball won’t be dropped until the 2012 London games. Who know how good Finch will look by then. Look at how far Christina Aguilera and Jennifer Love Hewitt have fallen lately. And we don’t even if she will still be playing then. And lets be honest, Derek Jeter looks more attractive than most of Finch’s teammates. As for baseball, this was a poor decision as the sport is huge in the Caribbean nations and Asia, so there was a lot of competition. And I dislike the IOC’s reason for baseball being dropped is because the MLB doesn’t send their players. That’s a sham because the Olympics are always better when the amateur players are participating and dropping one of the sports that doesn’t send its pro’s is a sham.
Now onto the baseball that truly matters, fantasy baseball. First there is Jobu’s Revenge of the California Penal League. Currently they are sitting in first place with a one game lead. Not bad for drafting 9 out of 12 teams. On top of that, I only have one player currently hitting over .300 (Jeter). Pitching has really been the strong point by picking up some gems in the later rounds like Chris Carpenter (9), Chad Cordero (11), and Livan Hernandez (13).
As for Bond’s Giant Head in the Bash Brothers League, they have been ransacked by injuries in the first half leading to a late slide in the first half to end up in 7th (out of 10) place and 16 games out. As mentioned earlier, injuries to Cory Patterson, Orlando Cabrera, Javy Lopez, Erik Bedard, among others have really damaged my worst to first dream. But at least I have the best name in the league.
In other sports news, it looks like hockey is back. Well that only too 300+ days.
Years ago, a wise man once told me “Video killed the radio star.” Well I’m here to give a new pronouncement, that Podcast killed the video star. It was an easy killing as videos have been in a decline since the late 90’s. MTV and VH1 rarely show them anymore. MTV2 and FUSE both focus on the agro-teenage boy demographic (i.e. trite rock and bling-bling rap), so to see videos, you are denigrated to having to find them on the web, typically with low quality.
As for Podcasts, I for along time thought that, like TIVO, I just wasn’t cool enough to use it. I had heard its name for a couple months but I wasn’t exactly sure what they were. But then a couple weeks ago, iTunes began offering up Podcasts, most (if not all) for free. My interest was peaked and when I opened the Podcast section on iTunes, I turned into a kind in a candy store. My eyes were open wide. They had Podcasts for everything you could think of: Sports, Music, News, Politics (for the right and left), Comedy, Technology, Education, even the Queer Eyes have their own podcast handing out gay tips. Today on one of my podcast subscriptions I heard a mash-up combining Kelly Clarkson’s Since U Been Gone and The Eagles One of These Nights (beacuse who wouldn't want to spend One of These Nights with Kelly). Now that’s worth the price of admission right there. And of course the price of admission is free.
And the Buggles prediction has come full circle because Podcasts are essentially radio broadcast for the internet. And unlike the radio, you can find something that interested as my radio plays very little in the way of diversity. And if you already have a Podcast, you can publish it through iTunes. Don’t expect a Scooter McGavin podcast anytime because I’m sure that I’m definitely not cool enough to do it.
There are a few Lyric Quiz songs that still have gone un-guessed, so I though I’d put up a couple hints.
1. The lead singers wife and child were prominently featured on their Live 8 performance.
6. This song was featured in the movie City of Angels.
13. Next line: She had hair so long that it looked like weave, now she cut all off, now she looks like Eve.
15. This artist is no stranger to helpful causes as he helped found Farm Aid.
16. Stevie Nicks is featured in this song but the group is not Fleetwood Mac.
18. Mos Def is featured in the video for this song but doesn’t rap on it.
19. This band features members from two huge bands of the 90’s.
20. She is a British singer who was severely overlooked in America.
23. At the time of this song, this rapper had a DJ.
25. They were the only rap act at Live Aid and wore a specific type of shoes during that performance.
I found this idea over at Postcards From Metro Suburbia and I thought it would be a good idea to steal (I mean sample, because stealing is wrong). So I have 25 different lyric listed. IF you think you know one, list the Artist and Song (must have both to receive credit) in the comment section, and if you are correct, I will un-bold the lyric and give you credit. If this is successful, it may become a monthly staple on the 9th Green and I will list the person with the most correct answers in a winner’s section on my sidebar. The first theme will be artists who performed at Live 8 so lyrics were chosen at random from those artist (and possibly former bands *hint*).
1. I lost my head and thought of all the stupid things I said. (Trouble - Clodplay - guessed by Pure Mood)
2. I’m a man of many wishes, I hope my premonition misses. (Lately - Stevie Wonder - guessed by Daria)
3. Yours are the sweetest eyes I’ve ever seen. (Your Song - Elton John - guessed by Daria)
4. I’m not part of a redneck agenda. (American Idiot - Green Day - guessed by Vryce)
5. I’m warning you don’t ever do those crazy messed up things that you do. (Call and Answer - Barenaked Ladies - guessed by IllyriaJones)
6. It’s the stuff, the stuff of country songs. (If God Would Send His Angels - U2 - guessed by Pure Mood)
7. Everyday should be a good day to die. (You Never Know - Dave Matthews Band - guessed by Ben)
8. Never thought I’d let a rumor ruin my moonlight. (Somebody Told Me - The Killers - guessed by Ben)
9. How does it feel to know you’ll never have to be alone. (Sweetest Goodbye - Maroon 5 - guessed by Gimmie a Dollar)
10. I’m a million different people from one day to the next. (Bittersweet Symphony - The Verve - guessed by Daria)11. I cut so much; you thought I was a DJ. (Drop it Like it's Hot - Snoop Dogg - guessed by patm)
12. Did you exchange a walk-on part in the war for a lead role in a cage? (Wish You Were Here - Pink Floyd - guessed by Luka)
13. She couldn’t afford a car so she named her daughter Alexis.
14. I guess I’m not alone at being alone. (Message in a Bottle - The Police - guessed by IllyriaJones)
15. Don’t feel like Satan but I am to them. (Rockin' the Free Worls - Neil Young - guessed by Cassiopeia)
16. I shake my jelly at every chance. (Bootylicious - Destiny's Child - guessed by Pure Mood)
17. You said that irony was the shackles of youth. (What's the Frequency Kenneth? - R.E.M - guessed by IllyriaJones)
18. I can’t wait for the first time. My imagination is running wild.
19. I won’t preach to you, but here’s a caution. (Cochise - Audioslave - guessed by Cassiopeia)
20. You’re talking so much sex, but you’re not telling us about AIDS.
21. You’re about as easy as a nuclear war. (Is There Something I Should Know - Duran Duran - guessed by Julie)
22. With a name I’ve never chosen, I can make my first steps. (Chocolate - Snow Patrol - guessed by Julie)
23. She said her name was Donnie but her shirt said Marie.
24. You’re such a secret, misty eyed and shady. (Bring on the Heartbreak - Def Leppard guessed by Vryce)
25. Walk through concert doors and roam all over coliseum floors. I stepped on stage, at Live Aid. (My Adidas - Run-DMC - guessed by Pure Mood)
