Spin-Offs that Need to Happen

When listening to The BS Report with Bill Simmons the other day, he mentioned how Joey essentially ruined the spinoff. And looking back on the decade he seems to be right with a small exception with lame CBS procedurals, and they really don’t count because they are just the same shows in different cities. The problem with Joey is that you don’t give a spinoff to a main cast member, audiences do not like to see someone from an ensemble by themselves, but instead you should give spinoffs to minor random characters. Like in the eighties when they gave shows to Mike Seaver’s gym teacher (R.I.P. Boner Stabone) and Balki’s elevator attendant. So with networks currently creating new shows to make up the Fall schedule, here are some spinoffs of random characters of current shows I would like to see:

Stuart from The Big Bang Theory: In order to keep his comic book store owner, he needs an investor that comes in the form of Will Wheaton who then takes a more involved role than Stuart would like and then hilarity ensues. Throw in a token hot chick (say, Kristin Kreuk who has some recent experience with nerds on Chuck) they hire as a cashier and I would watch every week.

Jack Burton from Chuck: Seriously, why is Gary Cole not on my television every week? And what better way to alleviate that problem than give Sarah Walker’s father his own series as he roams from town to town conning people. There would be plenty of crossover opportunities as Sarah and her dad need each other’s services to help out with their current cases or capers.

How I Met Your Father starring Rachel Bilson: Bringing in Rachel Bilson to be the mother’s roommate seemed like a complete waste. But that doesn’t have to be a wasted opportunity if you give her, and said mother, their own show as they search for love. Bonus in we actually get to meet the mother while How I Met Your Mother can excruciatingly draw out Ted meeting her.

Leslie Arzt from Lost: Yes he blew up into little pieces in season one, but this will be focused on a still together science teaching Artz in sideways land. Of course the show will have to feature Ben Linus as the European History teacher and the school would eventually hire John Locke full time. Then can even have the dude from Ghostbusters return as the antagonist principal. And what the hey, go ahead and have Walt attend the school (which I was surprised we didn’t see in the flashsideways already).

Mama Smash from Friday Night Lights: When Smash went off to college I was still hoping Mama Smash would still find a way onto the show; have her become the school nurse, let her daughter become the water girl, let her have a torrid affair with Tim Riggins, anything that would keep give her screen name, because let’s face it, no one gives a better reaction shot than Mama Smash. Or just give Mama Smash her own show where she moves to be closer to Smash to see him play and she could get a job at the Texas A&M school clinic. And believe me, there are plenty of entertainment that can come from a college clinic.

Dylan from Modern Family: In classic 80’s fashion, give a spin off to the breakout fringe character where we get to see Dylan and the Rusty Zippers chase fame and stardom. They could even get some mentoring from Izzy LaFontaine, the bassist of Spandau Ballet.



P.S. Bonus points for anyone who can name the shows that featured Mike Seaver’s gym teacher and Balki’s elevator attendant.