Zod Is Coming

Last season, much like every Smallville season finale, everyone in the Kansas farm town was in peril. Clark was transported to the artic, where the Fortress of Solitude eventually would be as Chloe tried to keep Lex from seeing Clark use the crystals all the while Smalville was bombarded by yet another meteor shower. His parents were holed up at gun point by the dude from Supernatural (obviously he didn’t make it out of the shower, Lana’s helicopter crashed right next to a downed UFO, then there was Lionel who looked as if his head would explode from the Kryptonian data that his brain seemed to be downloading.

Then like every season premiere, everything is resolved and all are safe by the time the credits roll. But they were quick to introduce a new menace from the Superman Universe, Brainiac. Granted much like Clack Kent has yet to go by his nickname, Brainiac only goes by his college professor alter ego Milton Fine. A couple more of Superman’s Super Friends also show up with Cyborg and Aquaman and we were also introduced to silver kryptonite which makes Clark go insane. But the best reunion of the season wasn’t that of anyone from the comic books, no, it was the reunion of Bo and Luke Duke when Tom Wopat showed up as Jonathan Kent’s old buddy and senator of the state who happened to have a penchant for strip clubs. And because the show never passes on a chance to make illusions and in-jokes to its own franchise, they even had the good ol’ boys ride together, jumping over things in their car.

The big new of the season was that, since Jor-El saved Clarks life, it would have to be exchanged for the life of someone he cared about. Seeing Lana’s car flip over, killing her in the process, after Lex chased after her after he kissed her was shocking. Well that was until Clark decided to get Jor-El to rewind that day so no one but Clark would remember it leading to the anti-climatic death of Papa Kent. As cheesy as that plot was, it did turn to be wat looks like the final straw that breaks up the Clark-Lex friendship as Clark blames Lex for the death of his father because had he not caused Lana’s death to begin with his dad may still be alive. Not that Lex remembers any of this.

The other theme of the season was to get Lois is as little amount of clothing as possible. First they got her all wet while stuffing her man made breasts in the smallest bikini top they can fine during the Auquman episode. Then later in the season they just went all they way by having her go undercover as a stripper albeit a patriotic one with her American flag outfit. Personally I much prefer my Los Lane with class, and this Lois Lane will most likely pale in comparison to the movie version, Kate Bosworth. Although maybe now that she is working for Martha the senator, she will continue to wear the busniess suits we usually seen past Lois in.

This was also the season they destroyed Lana Lang. After last season when they finally gave her an actual storyline with her being possessed by her witch ancestor that was quickly ignored as Lana went back to her damsel in distress routine of the earlier seasons. This season although Bad Lana did make an appearance during the vampire episode, where again the writers couldn’t pass up an in-joke with their guest star when former vampire James Marsters uttered the line, “There’s no such things as Vampires.” The lead vampire in the episode was not so coincidentally named Buffy. But I’m getting off track on Lana, her whole stand by her man at the end of the season with Lex got really annoying and almost made me wish that Clark didn’t save her in the original death sequence. But I have a feeling if Smallville makes it to a seventh season, Lana won’t. And with Chloe getting hotter by the season, it won’t be that big of loss of eye candy.

By the time the credits roll on the finale, once again everyone is in peril. Clark is stuck in the two-dimensional thing; Mama Kent and Lois are flying to not Washington, DC on Fine Airlines with no oxygen; Chloe and Lionel were dragged from his limousine by the mob of people that go crazy sole because the power went out all the while Lex, who is currently being possessed by Zod makes out with the now useless Lana. But naturally everything will be back to order by the second episode of next season.

Smallville 5.x gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.