All Those Other Girls, Well They’re Beautiful, But Would They Write a Song for You?

Taylor Swift recently promoted her latest album Taylor Swift (as in or forever hold your peace) on new channel The Hub. Despite there being much more prominent youth leaning channels around, The Hub is appropriate in that it is co-own by gaming king Hasbro because Speak Now includes the biggest game sweeping the nation: What boys are her songs about? Despite promising in her Target advertisement that she would be naming names, only one name appears on the album: John which most everybody has assumed is John Mayer (but I am holding out hope that it is in fact about Judd Hirsch, star of eighties sitcom Dear John).

So all the other songs on Speak Now, we are left to our own devises to figure out who the other songs about. Innocent is a gimmie considering Swift introed the song at the most recent Video Music Awards with last year’s debacle concerning Kanye West. And the lyric about a thirty-two year old (coincidentally the same age as John Mayer) who is still growing up pretty much confirms as much. Also highly likely is Taylor Launder is the subject of Back to December which mentions the first time the subject of song saw her cry was in September, the month of the Kanye incident in which Lautner was on stage for as the presenter. And is the “chain hanging on your door” a leash reference?

The other songs you will have to make your own conjectures, the most interesting of which is Better in Revenge where Swift turns her visceral hate toward the other woman. The girl in question is “not a saint and she’s not what you think, she’s an actress. She’s better known for the things that she does on the mattress.” Oh snap. So who has dated a Taylor ex, is an actress, wears vintage dresses, and has an easily rhymable name. Could it be Joe Jonas rebound girl Camille Belle? Of course John Mayer’s expanding harem is too long to hypothesize.

Wondering which song is about who is the biggest problem with Speak Now. Her previous albums were fun because we didn’t have to decipher whose pictures she was burn or who should have said no because they were just random dudes from Pennsylvania. During her cup of coffee with John Mayer, he should have warned her that no one wants to her a concept album about dating and breaking up with Jennifer Aniston, which is also why Counting Crows became not as entertaining a decade earlier. No one wants to hear people sing about famous people

Speak Now is the first album Swift wrote on her own and it shows, but not in a good way. It is clear she still need help with some phrasing and melody. Or just someone to say the title track was not a good idea to write about breaking up a wedding as many lines in the song are just cringeworthy. Never Grow Up is highly skipable or just might as well had been called Fourteen.

With that said, Speak Now is still a solid pop album (her transition away from country is complete here, and the label has only stuck for marketing reasons). The first single Mine is a fun and natural progression of someone who once sung fairytales like Love Story and is ready to grow up. The banjo infused Mean, the closest she gets to country, is a more entertaining attack song than Better Than Revenge where she unloads on the talking heads who rip on her inability to sing live. And Taylor truly grows for Haunted which sonically more stunning than anything she has done before and dabbles in hard rock and may be the greatest song Avril Lavigne has never recorded.

But Taylor, before your next album, you may want to try and find Drew for some inspiration because no one is going to want to hear songs about Jake Gyllenhaal.

Song to Download – Haunted

Speak Now gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

I Want My Music Television vol. XCIV

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.


Runaway - Kanye West and Pusha T



It should have been Taylor Swift’s week with the release of her highly anticipated junior album, but Kanye West just had to steal her thunder once again by releasing his thirty-five minute film just days before. Runaway is kind of boring and would have worked much better as individual music videos with a common theme. Like the song Runaway is much more digestible as a nine minute video (well the five minute version is more digestible as it cut off the fuzzed out ending).


Dear John - Jessie James



Speaking of Swift, on her new album she has a song titled Dear John that may or may not be about John Mayer (okay, it probably is). The only problem that Jessie James also recently released a song titled Dear John that may or may not be about John Mayer (okay, it totally is considering seventy-five of the lyrics are composed of titles of Mayer songs). Which begs the question, do we really need two songs written about Jon Mayer released in the span of a month?


1983 - Neon Trees



You really cannot go wrong starting a video with a Big reference (even if the movie came out in 1988 and the lead character wanted to be, well, big). Then throw in a lead singer with a Thriller jacket and imitating Billy Idol (at least I think that is what he was going for). Thank you Neon Trees. But what was with the random Corey Feldman sighting?


L.A. Girl - Yeti Beats featuring Fatlip



Even more eighties references, this time from Fatlip (you may better know his group The Pharcyde) reuniting him with Spike Jones who directed the groups seminal Drop video.

The Ten Most Anticipated Albums of Fall 2010

We are coming upon the fourth quarter which means record companies will actually start releasing albums in hopes that you will buy some to giveaway at Christmas. Please note that release dates are subject to change. Click the album name (or album artwork) to pre-order it on Amazon. Click the artist’s name for their iTunes page.

1. Dark Twisted Fantasy (working title) – Kanye West (11/16): He really shouldn’t be this high considering his last album was one of the worst of last decade. But this will be a return to rap, and it is hard not to get excited when the album will be headlined by two stellar tracks, Power and Runaway. I suspect there will be plenty of toasting to this douchebag this fall.

2. Speak Now - Taylor Swift (10/25): And how can you mention Kanye West without Taylor Swift? She gave us a definitive answer at the Video Music Awards to the question of if she would be addressing the Kanye incident from last year on the new album. Between Innocent and Mine, it sounds like Taylor is growing up quickly and moving further away from her country roots.

3. Wake Up! – John Legend & The Roots (Today): Fall 2010 looks like the season of collaborations with Ben Folds teaming with writer Nick Hornsby, Elthon John recording with his idol Leon Russell, and Mark Ronson hooking up with, well, everyone. But the union I am most interested in is this one from The Roots and John Legend covering mostly obscure soul records.

4. Record Collection – Mark Ronson & The Business Intl. (9/28): After bringing retro back in style with Amy Winehouse, Lily Allen, and his second album, Ronson has been working with Duran Duran and that comes though in a big way on this album which sounds very synth heavy. Look for appearances by Q-Tip, Ghostface Killer, Boy George, D’Angelo, and Simon LeBon himself.

5. Come Around Sundown – Kings of Leon (10/19): After their breakout with Only by the Night it is interesting how the Followell boys will follow up the success. From the sound of first single Radioactive, it will be more of the same.

6. Hands all Over – Maroon 5 (Today): After a pretty good debut album, every successive Maroon 5 album has gotten blander than the previous one. First single Misery doesn’t give me too much hope that Hands all Over will turn that around, but the album was produced by hair-band uber-producer Mutt Lange, so maybe it will be worth a listen.

7. Second Chance - El DeBarge (9/28): C’mon, who isn’t down with an El Debarge comeback? One can only be disappointed in that he didn’t bring the whole family with him.

8. Lonely Avenue – Ben Folds and Nick Hornby (9/28): Here was an album I had to do a double take when I first saw it announced. Quirky pop master Ben Folds and novelist Nick Hornby. For illiterates like me that are unaware of Hornby, his books that have been turned into movies include High Fidelity (which was number 10 on my list of The 100 Greatest Movies of the 00’s), About a Boy, and Fever Pitch (but do not blame him about the horrible adaptation because his book was actually about soccer). Hornby contributed the lyrics with Folds coming up with the music including a song about Alaska’s least favorite son Levi Johnston.

9. The Lady Killer - Cee Lo Green (12/7): I really was not interested in a Cee-Lo album that didn’t involve Danger Mouse, but after hearing the ultra-catchy (Explative Deleted) You, color me intrigued. But seriously, after this, lets get another Gnarls Barkley album out please.

10. Hot Sauce Committee part 1 - Beastie Boys (TBA): Putting this on the list may be a bit of wishful thinking because there is no release date announced yet, but with Adam Yauch doing better these days, he’s hoping he is well enough to do the rigors that surround promoting a new album.




Other albums of note:

Today
The Sound of Sunshine – Michael Franti and Spearhead
Guitar Heaven: The Greatest Guitar Classics of All Time – Santana
You Get What You Give – Zac Brown Band
A Year Without Rain – Selena Gomez and the Scene

September 28
Clapton – Eric Clapton
Invented – Jimmy Eat World
Pete Yorn – Pete Yorn
Le Noise – Neil Young
6: Commitment - Seal
The Dissent of Man – Bad Religion
Going Back – Phil Collins

October 5
Tiger Suit – KT Tunstall
Glow – Donavon Frankenreiter

October 12
Charleston, SC 1966 – Darius Rucker
The Rock and the Tide – Joshua Radin
The Age of Adz – Sufjan Stevens

October 19
Sale el Sol - Shakira
The Union – Elton John and Leon Russell
Libra Scale – Ne-Yo
Fly Me to the Moon... The Great American Songbook Volume V - Rod Stewart

October 26
Man on the Moon II: The Legend of Mr. Rager - Kid Cudi

November 2
...Featuring Norah Jones – Norah Jones
National Ransom – Elvis Costello
Dreams – Neil Diamond
Sidewalks – Matt and Kim

November 16
Born Free – Kid Rock
Loud – Rihanna

November 23
Hard Times and Nursery Rhymes – Social Distortion

Unknown Dates
Songs of Ascent – U2
The Believer – Common
Walk with Me Now and Fly with Me Later – DMX
Give Till it’s Gone – Ben Harper and Relentless7
Nothing – N.E.R.D.

And what would a music preview be without an obligatory this may actually be the season that Dr. Dre releases Detox mention.

I Want My Music Television vol. XCI

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.


Mine - Taylor Swift



What a striking difference between the last two lead videos from Taylor Swift. Love Story was all about princesses and fairytales, while Mine is strikingly real, warts and all. Though after Valentine’s Day, someone should have told Taylor that it is not a good idea for her to run on camera.


(Expletive Deleted) You – Cee-Lo



Apparently if there was one thing Cee-Lo learned from Kick-(Expletive Deleted) it is that ten year old’s swearing is thoroughly entertaining. There is word on the street that Green is releasing a version to the radio called Forget You. Song unheard, this is a bad idea, you never want to cram two syllables into where only one should be. Too bad he isn’t a Battlestar Gallactica fan because Frak You would have been better. But if I were making the decision I would have went the ironic root and change it to Thank You.


The Bike Song – Mark Ronson and Business Intl



Well Mark Ronson is continuing his theme of futuristic-retro Japanese talk show videos for better or worse.


The Catalyst – Linkin Park



I have no idea what is going on during this Linkin Park video and song, but I just watched it about ten times straight.

Young Love: Full of Promise, Full of Hope, Ignorant of Reality

Valentine’s Day is a polarizing holiday, well mostly for women. If they are in a relationship, they love it; if not they hate it and hate everyone that is celebrating. Guys on the other had hate it if they are in a relationship, will those that are not could have thee day pass and not even know it. And Valentine’s Day the movie (out today on Blu-ray Combo Pack, DVD, On Demand and for Download) may be just as polarizing where female loving romantic comedies will eat up this star studded affair while the boyfriends they make them watch will just be happy it isn’t as bad as He’s Just Not That into You.

The movie runs every gambit of love from school boy crush to young love (Taylors Swift and Lautner), couples ready to take the next step (Emma Roberts), a new relationship (Anne Hathaway and Topher Grace), a longer one (Jenifer Garner and Patrick Dempsey),a long distance love (Julia Roberts), the newly engaged (Jessica Alba and Ashton Kutcher), the old married couple (Shirley MacLaine and Hector Elizondo), a guy ready to find love (Eric Dane) and yes there are even the woman who hates the holiday because she doesn’t have a date (Jessica Biel) and a pair of guys that could care less the holiday is happening because they are not in a relationship (Jamie Foxx and Bradley Cooper). Also in the cast playing auxiliary roles to those in or about to find love include Kathy Bates, Queen Latifah, George Lopez.

Naturally, like the more entertaining Love, Actually, all the players end up interacting in each other’s storyline but what it misses is the heart where you actually care about a bulk of the cast. Oh yeah, and it misses on the second half of the romantic comedy equation but that is what happens when you can based on a pretty face (Alba and Biel should consider leaving the genre altogether) instead of legitimate comedians of which there are only two unless you count Larry Miller who makes a cameo and Jamie Foxx’s camerman (Foxx plays a sports reporters who is forced to be a man on the street asking about Valentine’s Day) who has a few good laugh even if half were reduced to the Delete Scenes section.

Also Hathaway shows that she should return to the genre more often as her storyline was by far the most entertaining. And there are some other hilarious moments including the Taylors at track practice where Lautner has a run in with a huddle (which was supposed to be funny) and Swift’s running style (which I am not sure was supposed to be funny but was anyway), then the younger Robert’s boyfriend has maybe the funniest scene I the movie while Lopez and Foxx rattle off a few good one liners. But for a movie that runs just over two hours, you should expect more than five big laughs through the film.

The blu-ray (which comes in a combo pack with the DVD and a digital copy) is pretty thin in the bonus feature department. There are your usual blooper real (which half is less bloopers and more the crew snapping the time marker but it does lead to a funny call back to a previous Garry Marshall flick) and audio commentary (which is mildly entertaining because Marshall oversells almost everything). And for all you ladies out there, there is also an extended sneak peek at the new Sex in the City 2 movie. There are also two short featurettes with stars talking about their Valentine’s Day experiences and other about working with Marshall along with a music video from Jewel. But the twenty minute deleted scenes with introduction from Marshall are worth checking including a bit where Foxx interviews Denver Nugget’s Chris Anderson in a tattoo parlor and a PSA featuring Dwight Howard and Penny Marshall (yes, Garry cut his own sister out of his movie).



Full Disclosure Notice: This Blu-Ray was given to me on behalf of Warner Brothers Entertainment for the sole purpose of reviewing the movie.