Worst. Super Bowl. Ever.

From the start pre-show until the end of American Dad and everything in-between, this was the worst super bowl that I can remember. Thanks Janet. Here's a running tally of everything that happened yesterday.

Pre-Show

Seeing Charlie Daniels dancing with the Black Eyed Peas was possibly the most disturbing thing I've ever seen. Nonetheless, Black Eyed Peas have performed at every event in the last 2 years. Super Bowl, Awards Show, Democratic National Convention. (There a many reasons why Kerry lost the election, but I would put having a group perform "Lets Get Retarded" "Lets Get it Started" has to be near the top.)

Alicia Keys was one of the few bright spots all day. Then again, it seems she can't do any wrong. Well barring hanging out with Usher. It was too bad Ray Charles couldn't be them himself because he always did do a great version on "America the Beautiful." I would highly recommend "Ray Charles Sings for America" if you don't have it already.

OK back to the bad stuff. Did anyone else notice that the coin "flip" didn't actually flip at all? I don't know if that kid didn't know how to flip a coin or if was trying to rig the outcome. It's time to bring back the legends to do the flipping.

The Game

I'm not going to restate the reasons why I don't think Belachick is not a genius, but I'd like to add that he went to the wrong bench to start the game. How does anyone lose to this guy? I'd resign in shame if I were Andy Reid. The real test of Belachick's "wisdom" will be next year when both coordinators are gone. By the way, Romeo Crennel meet Jeff Garcia. Have fun next year.

Did anyone find the irony in T.O. being guarded by some one named Randle Gay? But you have to give it up to T.O. for putting up triple digit yards, even if most of his catches were short out patterns. Although for a guy who once said if you don't want to see me celebrate, keep me out of the end zone, he did seem to break out the eagle flap about 30 yards away from said end zone. Which then led to Mike Vrabel to mocking him. Twice. This seems to be a start of a trend. If you remember 3 weeks ago, FredEx (the only time you will see his name) did the reverse moon twice. Doesn't this count as excessive celebration? But back to T.O., can you imagine what would happen if T.O. was 100%. Well, most likely, McNabb would have underthown him. Worst. Super Bowl performance. Ever. Three interceptions, not to mention one that was called back due to a penalty away from the play, and a fumble that was called back due to instant replay. Ouch. And as bad as McNabb was, the Eagles only lost by three.

Halftime

Paul McCartney is your anti-Janet this year perform good wholesome Beatles songs about illegal drugs. When I first saw McCartney going to the piano, I thought, "Oh, no, it's the obligatory ten minute version of Hey Jude," but was instead saved but "Live and Let Die" (which I believe he stole from Guns 'n' Roses). Another great message. Then it finally came, the obligatory ten minute version of "Hey Jude." I remember seeing McCartney doing this song on SNL once I swear at one point during the NaNaNa's he went, "OK 5 more times." Um, yeah, bathroom break time. At least this year's Super Bowl alleviated the major problems that have been plaguing most halftime shows, having someone perform than no one in the stand would enjoy. Sports fans tend to be middle aged white guys, so a former Beatle was a good choice. Do you think anyone who was at or watched the Orange Bowl listens to Ashlee Simpson? The problem with most halftime shows is they try to bring in a TV audience that would not normally watch the game itself. And that, in turn, is why most of them get booed. That and Ashlee Simpson is tone def. On another musically not "Sunday, Bloody Sunday" was not the best choice for a theme song. Although it wasn't the most out of place that song has been played this year. That award would go to the Clinton Library Opening.

Commercials

Here's my top 5:

5) Diet Pepsi (P.Diddy) - Nice social commentary on how people will do anything copy anything to be cool. Bonus points for putting the youngest Desperate Housewives in the spot. it is also interesting that that "Pimp My Ride's" own Xzibit has no problem selling himself for money. Honorable Mention for there other ad with the guy waking down the street turning every women's head including Cindy Crawford and one of the Queer Guys.
4) Mustang Convertible - If I had a convertible, I'd have it down at all times too. While I'm talking about car, I can't remember which one is was but why did some car maker drop 2.4 million on a car that doesn't come out until the end of 2005. Buzz doesn’t last that long as proven by how I can't even remember it's name.
3) NFL Network (Everyone is undefeated tomorrow) - One of the best sports ideas ever. Unfortunately it won't take the Brown's too long change that. My only problem is that I only recognized 3 people in the ad, Joe Montana, Ben Rothhngfhnkslflituebuger, and Dante Cullpepper, whom I only recognized him because he was singing with a Viking.
2) SBC (Wonderful Tonight) - Anyone who has had to wait an hour for a girl to get dressed can relate to this ad.
1) MBNA Credit Card - Charlie Daniels dancing with Black Eyed Peas, disturbing. Gladys Knight playing rugby, freaking hilarious.

Sadly it wasn't too hard to come up with this list because most of the ads were boring or just lame (LeBron, I’m taking to you). Seriously, two companies picked M.C. Hammer as their spokesmen. For those keeping track $4.8 million were spent on the selling power of M.C. Hammer. One ad even pointed out his poor money management. Did no one realize this in the pitch meeting? Also the only erectile dysfunction didn't air until 9:05. Thanks Janet (no sarcasm this time)

Another recent trend is the summer movie trailer during the Super Bowl. Here are the one's I will most likely see.

5) War of the World - I'm not actually see this movie since I've already seen Independence Day, but it was either this or Robots. Ever notice that the little girl in this movie is the new go to kid. I have a feeling Hailey Joel Osmont is rueing the day he went threw puberty.
4) The Pacifier - Even though it has Vin Diesel in it. Even though I saw it back when it was called Kindergarten Cop (Governor Diesel? shiver.) This may end up as a rental solely on the appearance of Brittany Snow who make "American Dreams" watchable each week.
4a) xXx - Ice Cube for Vin Diesel - upgrade.
3) Be Cool - Pulp Fiction meets Swingers via Get Shorty, I'm in.
2) The Longest Yard - It has Adam Sandler, but it also has Nelly. It has Chris Rock but it has Brian Bosworth. It has Michael Irving but it has Bill Romanowski. This could be the best or worst movie of the year.
1) Batman Begins - One word, Scarecrow. Best. Batman villain. Ever. But I'm not sold on the American Psycho as Batman and I like the Bat mobile as a sports car rather than a Hummer.

Post Game

Did anyone notice that the "Under 5" Post Show went almost 30 minutes? Oh well. Nothing hurt more then when Chris Collingsworth said, "There is not a person in Cleveland not scratching their heads and saying 'can you believe what we're seeing?" Ouch. As for the Simpsons, the show seemed a little dated touching on all most of the topics that shaped LAST year. At least the Comic Book Guy gave me a title for this commentary.

To cap of the Worst. Super Bowl. Ever. was Fox's newest show, American Dad, which apparently was from the makers of Family Guy. Did they really need to tell us that? Let's look at the families: Idiot Father - Check. Loving Mother - Check. Nerdy Son- Check. Smart Daughter - Check. Talking Pet - Check. Member with a weird accent - Check. Oh, what the heck, one for the road - Worst. Post-Super Bowl Show. Ever.