Monday, November 19, 2012

It’s True What You Heard, I am a Freak, I’m Disturbed


Lotus - Christina Aguilera

Two years ago Christina Aguilera released Bionic and it sank like a rock. It features songs where it sounded like Christina was trying to out-Gaga Lady GaGa at a time when most people were already tiring of Lady Gaga. It mirrored her debut album where she was riding the teen pop coattails of Britney Spears. But the thing is, Christina Aguilera, unlike the two other pop star (and many that populate the charts for the past decade) can sing. She is even the lynchpin coach on a show called The Voice. A half a year after Bionic dropped off the charts, Adele released 21 showing that people who can sing without all the trappings of a modern day pop singer. I thought to myself, Christina Aguilera should not be competing with the Britney Spears and Lady Gaga’s of the world; she should be competing with Adele.

So how does Christina Aguilera start her first album, Lotus, in the post-Adele era? With a heavy dose of auto-tune. Not only that, the first single was co-written and produced by Max Martin, the pop maestro who have us Baby One More Time. And like most songs from the Max Martin catalogue, Your Body is ultra catchy, but you think less of yourself when you catchy yourself singing along. I guess after three seasons of The Voice I should have seen this coming as everyone on her team have been bland pop singer with the exception of Jesse Campbell and Lindsey Pavao (neither of who inexplicably made the finales of her team) leading her to two straight last place finishes and with the new rule change this season will probably have her entire team voted off before the finals.

Christina did recruit two of her fellow coaches from The Voice to her new album (apparently Moves Like Jagger was enough studio time with Adam Levine). Cee Lo Green shows up on Make the World Move where Cee-Lo plays a glorified hype-man for the club ready track. Just a Fool is the closest thing Christina has ever come to country so it is not surprising she trades verses with the resident country voice on her show Blake Shelton, but I was left after the song was over wishing that Christina would had kept the song for herself as it could have been her one of her strongest ballads.

Even though she goes the ultra-pop route for most of the album, there is a quick Adele-type interlude for two songs in the middle of album starting with Sing for Me where Aguilera shows she is still the best voice of her generation. That is followed by Blank Page, which goes the stripped down Someone Like You route where it is just Christina and a piano (and some subtle strings flourishes). I would much rather have had a whole album like this especially where a song latter she starts a weird reggae segment includes pair of songs, Cease Fire and Circles.

But Lotus, for better or worse, is a pure pop album. Of course the album is littered with self empowering anthems, about half the tracks. While Red Hot Kind of Love harkens back to her Genie in the Bottle days. Army of Me and Make the World Move are good old school dance songs that thankfully do not utilize any of that annoying dub-stop or EDM trends that every pop song has to have these days (unfortunately Let There Be Love does jump on the annoying trend). It is clear from her choices on The Voice, Christina Aguilera still loves pop music, I just wished she would put out a record that rivals Adele.

Song to Download – Blank Page

Lotus gets a Terror Alert Level: Elevated [YELLOW] on my Terror Alert Scale.

Sunday, November 18, 2012

57 Channels and Only This Is On - 11/18/12


Once Upon a Time: Is this the first time seeing the King in Storybrooke? I remember not seeing and thinking he must had died in the fairytale world.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Revenge: So this was Emily’s grand plan for Mason Treadwell: set him up to make it look like he set up Conrad Grayson so he would be convicted for a crime he did not commit (much like her father) and he will admit to it if she promised to come clean after her master plan has been executed where she will then admit to the killing of the white haired man and give him the exclusive story. What? Unless she plans for Mason to also die in prison much like her father. But would it not have been much easier, even if it were less poetic) to just let Amanda bash his skull in?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

The Walking Dead: With the new season, they have really up its, Did That Really Just Happened moments be it impromptu leg amputations with an ax, or c-section deliveries with no medication. But they may have out done themselves this episode with the Governor brushing his zombiefied daughter’s hair, the zombie Thunderdome, and the zombie who apparently ate Lori whole. It will take a while for me to decide which scene grossed me out the most.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Homeland: Oh snap! The warden totally called out Saul for his beard! But I was extremely disappointed that Saul (and the guards) let Eileen alone. As soon as Saul left the room, I screamed at the screen, “Do not leave her alone with the wine bottle!” Sure I was wrong with the suicide method as it looked like she somehow killed herself with Saul’s glasses (because who does not walk around with an extra pair of reading glasses that make anyone see well?), but the sediment remained. And that was not the only false ending for the episode, just when you think Dana and Brody were going to report the hit and run, Carrie stops them at the last minute. Ugg. I do have a feeling Dana will be calling a press conference sometime in the next episode just to screw everything up. One last thing, Estes is the worst baby sitter ever. He lets Brody talk along in the sables with the party host and then sneak off to meet Carrie.

The Voice: I have joked a couple times this season that the producers read my post 10 ways to Fix The Voice, but after this week I am now convinced that they did. Previously they have implemented my suggestions to breeze through some Battle Round performances by montage, expand the Live Rounds (there will be eight performance episodes up from six last season and four the inaugural season), more Blind Auditions, they initiated The Steal, banned Adele (only one song this season, now they need to ban Katy Perry for next season), and got rid of the Product Placement I Refuse to Acknowledge (unless they pay me) Lounge (granted it got replaced by the Product Placement I Refuse to Acknowledge Skybox). They have even cut down on the annoying crowd screaming a little bit (though not completely). That is seven, and this week they added an eighth suggestion I made.

Cason Daly announced yet another new rule, that any artist who reaches the top 10 on the iTunes charts will have those votes multiplied by ten. Of course anyone who reaches the top 10 (which no one has done this season) probably is not in trouble of being voted out anyway, but I like the new wrinkle. iTunes success is a better indicator of future success but it accounts for the least amount of votes because people may make ten phone calls and vote ten times over the internet (or more with phony e-mail accounts) But no one, expect maybe family members, are buying ten sons on iTunes. The Top 10 may have been to altruistic and may should had gone with Top 25 instead. Apparently they quickly realize that the new rule did not do much (only two songs cracked the top 50 and not even close to the top 10) because the very next day they announced all music bought on iTunes this year will count for the finalist. Here is the Power Rankings for the top 10 and some thoughts on their performances:

The Voice Top 10 Power Rankings

1. Cassadee Pope – Cassadee has been number two a couple times on my Power Rankings and finally found herself this week with her best performance since her Blind Audition. Though after five straight pop-rock songs I would like to see her get out of her comfort zone next week even if it is taking a song from another genre and making it pop-rock.

2. Nicholas David – It is about time someone on one of these karaoke shows gave Huey Lewis & The News his proper due. I really liked when Nicholas went back into his Barry White voice halfway through the performance.

3. Trevin Hunte – Someone pointed out to me that this was the second week doing a Michael Bolton song (sure When a Man Loves a Woman is really a Percy Sledge that Bolton covered) and he loses some points for that. Plus this make have been his weakest performance. Much like Cassadee, Trevin needs to branch out and soon.

4. Amanda Brown – Amanda went bold last week and knocked it out of the park, she went big again this week, but did not quite reach the same heights.

5. Terry McDermott – I could not help but think back to Amanda last week who also closed the show with a seventies stadium anthem, but where Amanda nailed the notes at the end, Terry noticeably could not hit the signature high notes in More than a Feeling where Brad Delp original seemed to go higher and higher.

6. Cody Belew – Last week I thought he did a very Elvis Presley performance of One More Try and did a very Elvis performance of The Best this week. Maybe he should just do an Elvis song next week.

7. Sylvia Yacoub – Every time Sylvia showed up during the earlier rounds I thought, she is still on the show? Then she gave the most surprising performance last week, sitting down at the piano. She was back to she is still on the show status after a wobblely performance. Maybe she should had stayed behind the piano instead of having a creepy dude in a white suit on a creepy white piano instead.

8. Bryan Keith – He took a great song full of pathos and self loathing and turned it into a lounge act. Color me unimpressed.

9. Dez Duron – Again, Dez has impeccable taste in music, but his voice is just so boring and bland. He may have made the finals with the old rules, but I am not sure he even makes the top eight under the new system. He definitely should not.

10. Melanie Martinez – Oh Melanie, cool song choice, but I think this will be your last week on the show unless Christina’s final two contestants are eliminated in on swell swoop.

The results show was fairly uninteresting (Cee-Lo’s disco party notwithstanding). Adriana Louise (I wonder if she gets to come back for a Team Christina performance or if she is out of luck because they did not perform this week) and Michaela Paige were clearly on the bottom of the pile. Next week will be about as suspenseful as two by two every twenty minutes someone is saved before Cody and Sylvia get the ax. Maybe they should go back to having the teams battling themselves to be a finalist; those eliminations were much more suspenseful.


You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs from The Voice by clicking on the artist’s name.

How I Met Your Mother: Did we really spend a whole month having all the main characters break up with their significant others? Yeah, the show has officially run out of ideas.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

Castle: As everyone is moving onto the new found footage craze, the show went back to the ol’ early ’00 documentary footage route. And it was probably for the best.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.

Go On: Can they please add the hot station mascot to the cast please? Maybe her dad can die and join the support group for more airtime.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Go On on iTunes.

Parenthood: Why is grief the biggest aphrodisiac in Hollywood? It seems like whenever a guy on television show or movie has a lost in his life, the closest female to him is willing to have sex with him the cheer the dude up. Seriously, Drew is talking about his aunt that has cancer which makes his ex-girlfriend, with a college boyfriend, rip off all his clothes. Does this actually happen in real life because I have had a lot of loss and hardship in my life and not once has any chick had sex with me to console me.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Parenthood on iTunes.

Sons of Anarchy: There are so many moving pieces on the chess board this season I have no clue where this season is going. Actually I am not entirely sure if I understand what is actually going on right now. So many deals on the table, double and triple crosses it is hard to keep track.
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Philippines: When the votes were revealed to be tied 4-4 I knew that Penner would be going home because I figured that Skupin and Blair would vote together. So I was shocked to see Artis go home and even more shocked that it was Skupin that flipped his vote. I thought if only one flipped it would be Blair after being berated by Abi at Tribal. I was also surprised that Malcolm did not play his Idol. You can only bluff once and why hang onto it when everyone know you have it, an you alliance needs the numbers. Either play it for yourself so you do not get blindsided or give it to Penner just in case Skupin did not flip. At any rate, I cannot wait to see Hurricane Abi next week. Between her and Camilla from The Challenge, it is clear these reality shows need to recruit more Brazilian woman to these competition shows.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download Survivor: Philippines on iTunes.

The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons: Watching Hunger Games I have to wonder why Survivor ever stopped their gross food challenges. Quality entertainment. But you have to feel bad for CJ, dude somehow managed to beat the behemoth Zach at the physical challenge three out of five times but still went home. And fewer things are more entertaining than a crazy person acting all crazy while shouting, “I not going to make to look like a (expletive deleted) crazy person.”
You can download The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons on iTunes.

Last Resort: I do not understand, if someone stole Marcus’s key, why even dock the submarine. Search everyone before coming up for air. And just how many crew members have to be captured before they realize they should travel the island in pairs, or even groups?
You can stream recent episodes on Last Resort on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: I was expecting that the number 43 to not live up to expectation that I was kind of hoping they would leave it unexplained. Yet they managed to come up with two extremely funny ideas, the fake Sheldon looking for life in other dimentions, and the real Sheldon trying to break his own hackeysack record.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Grimm: Even though I hate when episodes, especially episodes before a long break, end with “…To Be Continued” but I did have to laugh the show had a sense of humor enough to add “Sorry” to it.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Grimm on iTunes.

Saturday, November 17, 2012

Best of the Week - 11/17/12


Quote of the Week: I got a pretty weak stomach especially when it comes to gross things. In the middle of the intestine is a chunk of fat that big. So it is a (expletive deleted) tube wrapped around fat… and topped with a testicle. (Zach, The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons)

Song of the Week: Pure Imagination – Willy Wonka (2 Broke Girls)

Scene of the Week:


Big News of the Week: More Drama with Army Men Than on Army Wives: To be honest I have tried to avoid the David Petaeus scandal because I am just waiting for the inevitable Lifetime movie to get the full story, but apparently there are sordid e-mails, shirtless pictures, and of course, twins. When will people learn they should not transmit their dirst laundry across the internet because it will always come out eventually. Seriously, I learned this lesson from Vanessa Hudgens five years ago, how could the CIA director not figure that out yet?

Preview Picture of the Week:

Megan Fox on Wedding Band

Free Download of the Week: Green Hill Christmas Music Sampler

Deal of the Week: 100 Albums for $5: Grab Greatest Hits from James Taylor, Phil Collins, Christina Aguilera, and Bill Withers.


New Album Release of the Week: Stronger - Kate Earl

New DVD Release of the Week: The Expendables 2

Video of the Week: This week ABC debuted The Gift of Revenge which had the characters of Revenge (not surprisingly minus the two leads) being led to a party hosted by Nolan for no apparent reason. Okay it turned out to be an extremely long commercial for… um, I do not remember. But it reminded me of the revolutionary “pods” that were going to air instead of commercials which, if I am not mistaken, only lasted a week before they went back to normal commercial breaks. So apparently The CW were just ahead of their times (maybe it is time for a Farmer Takes a Wife reboot). But I wonder just who wrote The Gift of Revenge: the normal Revenge writers? An ad company? Are the ads supposed to be considered cannon? Suburgatory also has its own in show sponsor, which begs the question what is next? Are we going to learn the aliens from The Neighbors are actually the alien race from Halo? Are the doctors of Grey’s Anatomy going to play the kids game Operation?


Next Week Pick of the Week: Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, Thursday at 9:00 AM on NBC: Thanksgiving morning for me is putting some cinnamon rolls in the oven and turning on the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. Sure in recent it seems like I know less and less of the performance. Case in point this year: Cody Simpson, Megan & Liz, The Wanted, and Jennette McCurdy. The festivities will also include Carly Rae Jepsen, Flo Rida (because who says turkey more than Flo Rida), Neon Trees, Colbie Caillat, Karmin while the Olympic Gymnastics team, Jimmy Fallon and The Roots will jump on the floats.

Friday, November 16, 2012

Around the Tubes - 11/16/12



I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on American Masters: Inventing David Geffen, Dungeons and Dragons: The Book of Vile Darkness, Whisker Wars, Cesar Millan: The Real Story, Witness: South Sudan, Smash, Cledus T.Judd, Bunheads, Martha Speaks, Cougar Town.

- This Tuesday, PBS will be airing American Masters: Inventing David Geffen at 8:00 (check your local listings). Notoriously press and camera-shy, David Geffen reveals himself for the first time in this unflinching portrait of a complex and compelling man. His far-reaching influence as an agent, manager, record industry titan, Hollywood and Broadway producer, and billionaire philanthropist helped shape American popular culture for the past four decades. Witty, self-aware and candid, Geffen and over 50 of his friends, colleagues and clients, as well as other media luminaries, including Cher, Tom Hanks, Steven Spielberg, Elton John, Don Henley, Neil Young, Jackson Browne, Nora Ephron, Mike Nichols, Clive Davis, and Irving Azoff.

- Need more dragons with your turkey leftovers this year? If the answer is yes, you are in luck because next Saturday (11/24) Syfy will premiere their new original movie Dungeons and Dragons: The Book of Vile Darkness. Check out the trailer below:


- The new season of Whisker Wars returns next Friday to IFC right around the time you to get the cranberry sauce out of your beard. Check out the trailer below:



- The new Cesar Millan show Leader of the Pack does not premiere until January, but you can get a sneak peak Thanksgiving weekend during Cesar Millan: The Real Story airing Sunday November 25 at 9:00 on Nat Geo Wild.

- HBO’s Witness series continues this Monday with South Sudan. In this installment, Veronique de Viguerie – follows the "Arrow Boys" and their struggle against mass murderer General Kony is South Sudan.

- In the least surprising news of the week, Liza Minnelli will appear as herself on the upcoming season of Smash. And yes she will be singing on the show.

- New music out this week include Parodyziac!! by Cledus T.Judd including a song featuring Rodney Carrington.

- Bunheads is set to return Monday, January 7 at 9:00 on ABC Family and they recently released the key art. Take a gander below:


Bunheads


- PBS KIDS' Martha Speaks is celebrating the Thanksgiving holiday with a brand-new episode highlighting Martha's search for her family. Tune-in to learn more about Martha's history all Thanksgiving week long beginning November 19, 2012 on PBS KIDS (check local listings).

- Casting alert! Shirley Jones (The Partridge Family) is set to guest star on the upcoming TBS season of Cougar Town. Jones will be playing an elderly woman who buys Grayson’s old house under the condition that Jules spends time with her.

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Lyrics Quiz: It's the End of the World as We Know It (and I'm Starting to get Worried)


About 26 centuries ago the Mayans created a calendar that ended December 21, 2012. Some have theorized that it was a prediction of when the world would end. Then again maybe the calendar maker though 2,600 years into the future was enough, maybe he died and no one wanted to continue his work, or he simply ran out of room. So in honor of what could very well be my last lyrics quiz ever, I have dedicated the theme to apocalyptic songs and the paranoia that goes along with thinking the world is going to end. As always leave your guesses, both artist and song title, in the comment section (or e-mail me). If you are correct I will un-bold the lyric and give you credit. Please keep in mind the lyrics quiz is for entertainment purposes only so please only use your own meandering mind to guess them.

1. When I woke up this morning could have sworn it was judgment day. The sky was all purple there were people running everywhere.
2. We can live beside the ocean, live them all behind. Swim out past the breaker, watch the world die.
3. The ice age is coming, the sun’s zooming in. Engines stop running, the wheat is growing thing. A nuclear era, but I have no fear.
4. I hear hurricanes a blowing. I know the end is coming soon. I fear rivers overflowing. I hear the voice of raising ruins.
5. Hey Satan! Paid my dues playing in a rocking band. Hey momma! Look at me I’m on my way to the Promised Land.
6. We’re leaving together, but it’s still farewell. And maybe we’ll come back to Earth. Who can tell? I guess there is no one to blame.
7. War, children, it’s just a shot away.
8. I’m gonna rock you like a baby when the cities fall. We will rise as the buildings crumble, float there and watch it all. Amidst the burning, we’ll be churning. Our love will be our wings, passion rising up from the ashes.
9. There’s too many men, too many people making too many problems and not much love to go around. (Land of Confusion - Genesis; guessed by Kevin)
10. We held a concert out in Brooklyn to watch the Island Bridges blow. They turned our power down and drove us underground but we went right with the show.
11. Thirteen month old baby broke the looking glass. Seven years of bad luck, the good things in your past.
12. Perhaps you never sleep because every time you doze you catch blows to the (expletive deleted) nose. Ain’t seen the sun in 66 days. Like me count the ways in a (expletive deleted) maze.
13. Take the power back. It’s time the fat cats had a heart attack. You know that there time is coming to an end. We have to unify and watch out flag ascend.
14. Panic bells, it’s red alert. There’s something here from somewhere else. The war machine springs to life.
15. Till Armageddon no shalam, no shalom . Then the father hen will call his chickens home.
16. It's the same everyday in a hell man made. What can be saved, and who will be left to hold her?
17. Last time we met it was a low lit room. We were close together as a bride and groom. We ate the food, drank the wine. Everybody having a good time. Except you.
18. In silk suit, trying not to sweat. Hit summersaults without the net. But this’ll be the year we won’t forget. One-nine, nine, nine, Ano Domini, anything goes.
19. I didn’t mean take up all you sweet time. I give it back one of these days. I don’t need you no more in this world. I’ll meet you on the next one, so don’t be late.
20. God bless us everyone we’re a broken people living under loaded gun. Now he can’t be out fought, he can’t be out done, he can’t be matched, he can’t be outrun.
21. Feel it coming in the air. Hear the screams from everywhere. I'm addicted to the thrill. It’s a dangerous love affair. Can’t be scared when it goes down. Got a problem, tell me now.
22. Steal me, deal me, anyway you heal me, maim me, tame me, you can never change me.
23. Sad can’t catch me, call me baby now. When it's all I use to believe. If the sun don't light, and the night won’t turn…
24. Just when everyday seemed to greet me with a smile. Sunspots have faded and now I'm doing time.
25. Lenard Bernstein!

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

I Want My Music Television - 11/14/12


There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.


Lovers of the Light – Mumford and Sons


What the frack is going on in the new Mumford and Sons video? There just seems to be random images of a blind Idris Elba with Taylor Swift’s shocked face and deer.


Stray Heart - Green Day


The new Green Day music video brings new meaning to the word “brokenhearted”. I particularly enjoyed the smoking heart.


Carry On - Fun


Is anyone really interested in a Fun behind the scenes music video? Those should really be reserved for hair metal bands.


This Kiss - Carly Rae Jepsen


I think we are closer to the end of the Carly Rae Jepsen era (although I should wait until the hundredth time I’ve listen to the song before making a definitive statement) because this just does not feel like a hit even though it sounds like chorus sounds like as close they could to ripping of Kiss On My List without violating copyright law.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Previewing Doomsday Preppers 2.x


Doomsday Preppers getting ready foe a small Pox outbreak

My sources tell me that the world is coming to an end in five weeks, and no show on television properly gets you ready for the end of times better than Doomsday Preppers which returns tonight for a second season with back to back episodes. Although if I were to play armchair programmer, it is a shame that National Geographic Channel did not start the season a month ago so the entire season could end before the conclusion of the Mayan Calendar with a special end of the world season finale (possibly series if, you know, the world really ended) just days before the world came to an end. Maybe the suits at the network do not think the world will be coming to an end next month.

I find Doomsday Preppers enjoyable if only because it is nice to know there are people out there more paranoid out there than I am. For the unaware, the show follows three people (or families) that are preparing for worst case scenarios: terrorist attacks, natural disasters, and anarchy. Then at the end of each segment, the show confers with expert Preppers on how they can approve and rate them on a scale of one hundred and will even give a probability of their fears actually coming true (spoiler alert! they always turn out to slim to none).

Tonight you will meet a family preparing for a small pox epidemic (well the father is, the rest of the family seems to be sheepishly following him), a fifteen year old prepping for the economic collapse (dude started during the banking crisis… when he was eleven), a terrorist attacking a nearby nuclear facility (apparently moving away from a nuclear plant is not an option), multiple F-5 tornados, nuclear war, the melting Greenland ice sheets (moving from Florida to northern Texas was not enough prepping to the couple).

Just how far do the Doomsday Preppers go? Of course there are fallout bunkers stocked with a year’s supply of food, 1000 gallons of water, 10,000 pounds of wood, and the occasional chicken, but some of these people go the extra mile. One prepper has so many contingency plans, he even recruited his wife’s twin sister for a new mommy for his children just in case something happens to the original along with three ways to escape: car, ATV, and even boat (though I noticed there was only enough room for the three adults, so the two kids and dog would be out of luck then). But my favorite is the dad so scared of a small pox epidemic that not only does he practice evacuations, he even went so far as to set up a surprise military checkpoint for his family to go through on their way to their secluded cabin. And I thought I was paranoid.

Doomsday Preppers airs Tuesdays at 9:00 on the National Geographic Channel. You can stream recent episode on Hulu. You can also download Doomsday Preppers on iTunes.


Monday, November 12, 2012

Roll Me Up and Smoke Me When I Die - A Book Review


Roll Me Up and Smoke Me When I Die (Musings from the Road) - Willie Nelson

God bless you Willie Nelson. Who else would name their autobiography Roll Me Up and Smoke Me When I Die (or course there is a song of the same name off his latest album Heroes which Willie also recorded with Snoop Dogg, probably the only other person who would write a book of the same name). Although thanks to all the smoking Willie has done in his life, this is not your normal autobiography and really reads more like a diary.

The book starts off like a normal autobiography with Willie talking about growing up Abbott, Texas including his first couple memories. You get stories about Willie and his buddies punching bees and his first couple jobs before he started making money playing music. Then out of nowhere he goes on a diatribe about Occupy Wall Street (Willie is not fond that the same people that complain about welfare are quick to put their hands out for subsidies) and from there it is a hodgepodge of anything that crosses Willie’s mind for 169 pages.

There are stories throughout Willie’s life, song lyrics, diary like entries of the last couple months while writing the book, short thoughts of the day, and more than a few joke, most of them dirty. There are even entries buy friends and family of Willie’s, most of which end up being longer than some of the segments that Willie wrote. The book also features plenty of photos of Willie with his family. The book is so family oriented that there are even illustrations by Willie’s son Micah.

The shortness of the stories is a plus and a negative. It is nice for people like me who have only a short time to read thing and do not get stuck in a chapter when he needs to start doing something else. But when he gets to some interesting stories you are left wanting more. Personally I would have like a lot more on his time in The Highwaymen. Thanks to his proclivity for the greener things in life, we may never get a proper autobiography where Willie goes in depth into these stories, but Roll Me Up and Smoke Me When I Die should give a good insight to the man to any Willie Nelson fan. And of course if there are any of those people on your Christmas list, this will make a great gift with almost a month until the holidays.


Full Disclousure Notice: This book was given to me by William Morrow / Harper Collins Publishers for review.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

57 Channels and Only This Is On - 11/11/12


Once Upon a Time: So the due from the start of the season turned out to be Henry’s dad. I figured it was either that or he was going to turn out to be Mr. Gold’s son. But did they really have to wait until the sixth episode to show the guy again? I completely forgot he existed until he popped up on the “previously on” segment. And why exactly are Henry and Sleeping Beauty having shared dreams. I guess we will have to wait until episode twelve (at the earliest) for that answer.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Revenge: So just what is The Initiative up to now? Although I would rather know at this point why exactly they downed that aircraft first. And what exactly is Emily’s end game for Mason Treadwell because he basically has already figured out who she is. Is she going to use him as a pawn or is he going to end up with the White Haired Man?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

The Walking Dead: Just when you thought the election would cause the most joy this week (at least for the socialists), the show had to go and kill off Lori. And they had to do it very graphically as her baby was cut right out of her as she was left to bleed to death until her son ended her suffering. Ouch. It was about as close as a zombie baby eat its way out as all the fanboys wanted as you could get. I love how the show this season has said, forget plot, forget character growth, let’s just gross everyone out. Oh yeah, T-Dawg died too.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Homeland: I finally caught up on this season and at the end of last season I thought the show would have been better if Brody either blew himself up or got caught and now that Brody is now a triple agent I am beginning to think I was right. And even though the genesis was a great, Oh Crap moment, I do not really care about the whole privileged boy kills a nobody with Dana being caught in a moral dilemma storyline. But the show continues to keep you on your toes like when the Arab Swat Team (including the nameless dude working with Roya) came in and killed everyone. And that was a big box,

The Voice: Oh America, how could you have gotten things so wrong, but oh so right. Let’s start from least to most surprising (which not so surprisingly is how they were revealed this week). It was pretty obvious that the three that would move on from Team Adam would be Amanda (who gave not only the best performance of the week, but of the whole season), Bryan, and Melanie; even though I thought Melanie would get the America’s vote with Adam saving Bryan. It is nice to see America was not fooled by Melane’s façade and she may not be around much longer (though I bet all of Christina’s team will be gone first).

The America’s Vote for Blake’s Team was obvious wit Cassadee and Terry breezing through. It was mildly surprisingly that Blake went with Michaela over the country girl Liz Davis and the Lou Diamond Philips endorsed Julio Cesar Castillo even though Michaela did have the slightly better performance of the three this week. Which begs the question, what happened to the Last Chance performances? I quite enjoyed those.

Now on to the more shocking results. It was not all that surprising that Sylvia got through by America because she had the standout performance with her piano enhanced version of a Katy Perry song (though I wonder just how much she was playing because I could still her the piano being played when she lifted her hand off the instrument, and could she have picked a song that was not already preformed this season; actually everyone just needs to stop singing Katy Perry on the show period). But I was severely disappointed that America also chose Dez over the much more entertaining De'Borah or one of the hot chicks. Seriously, why is it that the horrible cute boys always get through but never the mediocre hot chicks? And just when you think Christina was going to correct America’s wrong by sending De’Borah through, she picks one of the hot chicks. She did not even pick the better hot chick either. Carson crowed that everyone contestant this week charted on iTunes, but Adriana barely cracked the top 200 on the Pop charts while Devyn was in the top 100. (Laughable, as all twenty of The Voice contestants charted on iTunes, only one from The X-Factor charted on the Top 200.)

Now for the most shocking result of the week, I figured Dez being picked by America was a harbinger that the even less talented but cuter MacKenzie Bourg would also be pushed through by the annoying teen girl faction. Adam even laughably called MacKenzie an “American Idol” after his performance, a not so suitably dig the other show’s penchant for crowning mediocre cute boys who play guitar. Thankfully America ended up picking the best two singers in Trevin and the great but awesomely strange looking Nickolas while Cee-Lo made a rare good decision (granted his Live Show decisions do tend to be much better than his Battle Round decisions in saving Cody. De’Borah may have gone home too soon, but at least we will still have at least one more week of little Bam Bam.

Next week is when the real playoffs begin because for the first time anyone from any team can go home, not just one or two from each team. Ever since the announcement I assumed Team Christina would be the first three out (which makes me wonder if Christina is just a horrible judge of talent or if she sabotaged her team so they would be the first out so she could focus on promoting her new album out this week). Adriana is most; likely first out the door followed by either Dez, unless the teen girls rise up after the loss of MacKenzie, or Sylvia, unless she can pull another performance out like this week. But I have a feeling Christina’s three, along with Michaela, will be the first four out. At any rate, here is my personal Power Rankings of the Top 12:

Top 12 Power Rankings

1. Amanda Brown
2. Nicholas David
3. Trevin Hunte
4. Cassadee Pope
5. Cody Belew
6. Terry McDermott
7. Sylvia Yacoub
8. Michaela Paige
9. Brian Keith
10. Adriana Louise
11. Melanie Martinez
12. Dez Duron

One last thing: did they really air a Tweet from disgraced Senator David Vitter? You know, the family values candidate who got caught paying for prostitutes; and still managed to get reelected after the scandal. And people wonder why everyone hates Congress so much; stupid people in stupid states keep on reelecting stupid people like Vitter. When will people learn we need to vote out all the bums, even if they have your favorite letter next to their name.


You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs from The Voice with the widget at right.

Castle: I was a bit disappointed that during a heavy sci-fi episode they did not bring in more stunt casting other than Principal Snyder. But it was still pretty funny and entertaining at any rate.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.

Survivor: Philippines: Probst loves talking in hyperbole, but I have to agree that this was one of the biggest mess of a tribal council ever. Occasionally you may have one person lay all the cards on the table as a last gasp, or out of spite at Tribal Council, but this is the first time when almost everyone laid out all their cards. Of course Malcolm pretty much had to confess to having the Idol and he was using it (which he wisely did not), but I was flabbergasted when Probst sarcastically asked if anyone wanted to show theirs only for Abi to comply. Then you had you had two people openly lobbing for voted laying out their plans. And of course Tribal was capped off by a bizarre vote because for some reason Penner voted for Abi instead of Pete like the rest of his alliance. I do not know if he thought the other alliance was voting for Malcolm and Abi would give Pete her Idol and his brilliant vote would end up being the only one that counted or he did it out of spite for his alliance turning on him last week. At any rate, a great episode. I have said it before and I will say it again, Survivor needs to cast many more morons. But the biggest loser of all was Jeff Kent who wanted so bad to make sure he made it further than Penner he made a horrible decision last week and still ended up leaving before Penner. This is why he went on Survivor after baseball instead of becoming a manager.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download Survivor: Philippines on iTunes.

Modern Family: Did no one else notice the awesomely creepy painting of Hayley and Dylan hanging in her dormroom wall?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Modern Family on iTunes.

Subugatory: The show is the funniest on television but the one misstep it takes is the crappy title sequence. Well at least I now that the title is the fault of Tessa’s mother.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Suburgatory on iTunes.

Nashville: Is it wrong that I was really enjoyed when Juliet got slapped?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.

The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons: As much a I enjoyed watching San Diego imploding, Brooklyn made a serious tactical error by picking the behemoth on the team to go in. Sure you would think he would not do well in a mental challenge, but that challenge is really only a mental challenge for the female and for the guy it is more about strength and endurance, the behemoth’s strong points. If Brooklyn wanted to send someone home from San Diego home, they should have chosen Frank (who was wise not to volunteer) who I do not think could have made it to the bottom of the tank.
You can download The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons on iTunes.

Last Resort: There are fewer things I have more than dream sequences and hallucinations are just dream sequences when you are awake.
You can stream recent episodes on Last Resort on iTunes.

Saturday, November 10, 2012

Best of the Week - 11/10/12



Quote of the Week: Honey, you are fighting for your future in front of a disciplinary committee, not entertaining the secret service. (Claire, Modern Family)

Song of the Week: Low Rising – The Swell Season (Castle)

Scene of the Week:


Big News of the Week: Mackenzie Was Voted off the Voice!: Just kidding, the real big news was the election. I did not care for either candidate (is it too soon to put up a Huntsman 2016 yard sign?) so I knew the country would lose either way. But if there was a winner Tuesday it was Nate Silver of Five Thirty Eight. Even though I did not really cared about the outcome, I am a big stats geek and still poured over the daily polls, and Five Thirty Eight was daily reader. And after getting forty nine state correct in 2008, Silver correctly predicted all fifty states this time around (assuming Florida stays in the Obama column, but it is Florida, so we may not know until January). As a stat geek, I know actually correctly predicting the outcome of fifty states based on polls in itself is a statistical anomaly. Although it is a little depressing that after twenty months of campaigning, around twenty-five debates, and over a billion dollars nothing really changed in Washington: Obama got reelected, the Senate still belongs to the Democrats and the House is still being ruled by the Republicans. Seriously people, in 2014 stop voting for the “R” or “D” besides a candidate’s name, look for the “I” and then vote for the other candidate. That is the only way to get real change in Washington.

Preview Picture of the Week:

Wedding Band premiering tonight on TBS

Free Download of the Week: The Noise Trade Loft Sessions Mixtape – Rachael Yamagata

New Album Release of the Week: Lotus (Deluxe Version) - Christina Aguilera

New DVD Release of the Week: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Complete Classic Series Collection

Video of the Week: When I heard there was going to be a romantic zombie movie, my first thought was, oh goodness no. Even worse it is coming from the same studio that released those horrible romantic vampire movies. Then I saw the trailer for Warm Bodies. It may be one of those movies where all the good parts in the trailer, but it at least will get me to watch. And bonus points for Teresa Palmer who should be more famous than she is.


Next Week Pick of the Week: Space Dive, Sunday at 7:00 on the National Geographic Channel: The world was captivated last month when Felix Baumgarter traveled up 120,000 feet to do a sky dive. And the National Geographic Channel documented the dive with more than twenty cameras and now you can se the whole jupm like you have never seen before in this special.

Friday, November 09, 2012

Around the Tube - 11/9/12


I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on Mel Brooks Strikes Back!, Downton Abbey, Harry Potter, The Notebook, Battlestar Galactica, Mankind: The Story of Us, The Americans, Jim Rome on Showtime, the mayans, American Life, Dastardly, and Esthero.

- Mel Brooks fans (which I assume is everyone) mark your calendar because on December 10 at 9:00 HBO will be airing Mel Brooks Strikes Back! Appearing onstage with Alan Yentob, creative director for the BBC, at the Geffen Theater before a live audience, Brooks reviews his career as a writer, director, actor, producer, composer, failed ballet dancer and comedian. The special looks at the Brooklyn native’s early life, show-business influences, early career and ascension as one of Hollywood’s most successful writers and directors. Check out a preview below:


- As the anticipation for the third of Downton Abbey mounts, PBS will be going behind the scenes with Angela Lansbury to relive great moments with your favorite characters premiering Sunday November 25, Thanksgiving weekend.

- Next week, starting Monday at 7:00 through Thursday, ABC Family will be airing a Harry Potter Marathon. But before then the channel will be airing a Special Edition of The Notebook which includes over ten minutes of deleted scenes Sunday at 8:00.

Ryan Gosling wants to to watch the Special Edition of The Notbook


- For those waiting to see the latest installment of Battlestar Galatcica, wait no more because Blood and Chome premieres today on the Machinima Prime YouTube page.

- History is rolling out its next mini-series, Mankind: The Story of Us narrated by Josh Brolin premiering Tuesday, November 13 at 9:00. The six –part series will take a look how went from hunter-gatherers to global citizens. Take a look at a sneak peak below:


- The promos for the upcoming FX series The Americans have been fairly ambiguous, but here is a promo with actual footage which kind of make it look like Homeland circa 1981 with Felicity filling in for Angela Chase. That works for me.


- After being lured away from ESPN by CBS, Jim Rome has been relegated to something called CBS Sports Channel which is in the digital part of my cable package and I think you have pay for it too. Soon Rome will be shown on another pay channel, but this time Showtime when Jim Rome on Showtime, a one hour sports talk show premiering Wednesday, November 21 at 10:00.

- Get ready to hear It’s the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine) in heavy rotation over the next month as we inch closer to the ending of the Mayan calendar. And The National Geographic Channel is celebrating with three new specials across two night December 2 and 3. Evacuation Earth will be on the 2nd at 9:00 which explores the possibility of building a spaceship to take us to a new world to habitat if ours reaches extinction. Then on the 3rd at 9:00 The Mayan Apocalypse 2012 shows how the phenomenon swept across the internets. It will be followed by Maya Underground: The Real Doomsday to see if the civilization really predicted the end of the world.

- For those that listen to This American Life on the radio but always wanted to watch the show, now you can. They just released a video of a two-hour episode entitled The Invisible Made Visable which you can download for $5 at live.thisamericanlife.org.


- Fans of old time folksy records will want to check out Ballads in Blue by Dastardly on Band Camp where you can stream the songs in their entirety before buying. While people who like their pop music out on the fringes, check out the newly released Everything Is Expensive by Esthero.

- I agree with the John F. Kimberling article What This Country Needs: A New Political Party on the Huffington Post but unfortunately I do not think it is going to happen because there is just two much money in the current parties, and if Ross Perot cannot create a new one with his money, I do not see anyone else being able to do it.

Thursday, November 08, 2012

Previewing Wedding Band


Mother of the Bride on Wedding Badn

For those Beverly Hills, 90210 fans who have ever wanted to hear a grown David Silver sing Hollaback Girl, I have a treat for you: This Saturday is the premiere of Wedding Band where Brian Austin Greene plays the lead singer of a wedding band. Seriously, how did it take almost fifteen years to serialize the great Adam Sandler movie? I guess we have Glee (and Smash, and Nashville) to thank for this. But unlike Glee, the performances on Wedding Band are intentionally cheesy (I think), see the aforementioned Hollaback Girl sung by a grown man, or as grown a man as David Silver can be.

Yes that is David Silver singing Hollaback GirlJoining David Silver in the fictitious Mother of the Bride band include Peter Cambor (Notes from the Underbelly) as the guitarist and token dad in the family who has to juggles his kids, his wife, and gigs to live out his rock and roll fantasies. Derek Miller (Secret Girlfriend) is the drummer and totally steals Jack Black’s persona to the point his character’s name is the same as Jack’s in High Fidelity. The new guy on bass is Harold Perrineau, a studio musician who really has never had a band of his own, granted it is a little weird to see his cheeky performance on Wedding Band days after seeing him do things like light someone’s kid on fire for Sons of Anarchy. Filing out the cast are Jenny Wade (Feast) as the wedding planner who has to deal with the boys shenanigans and her boss played by Melora Hardin (The Office) who does not seem to have a filter which means she is the most entertaining character on the show.

Jenny Wade of Wedding BandWedding Band also has an impressive guest list signed up for the show including Ken Marino (Party Down) who plays the lead singer of Mother of the Bride’s rival wedding band Armageddon It (which of course is also a Def Leppard cover band). Ken may be too good in his role because after he and his band are introduced, it is clear the show would have been much more entertaining if it were focused on Armageddon It instead. Also showing up sometime this season are Ryan Hansen, Gary Cole, Bill Simmons (yes the Grantland guy, Kurtwood Smith, Donald Faison, Ashley Williams, Pat Monahan (yes, the dude from Train is surprisingly the only musical guest the show managed to wrangle), and James Marsters. Greene was even able to pull in his wife Megan Fox (in the second episode) as the star of a sci-fi show with an annoying fan base who accidentally shares the ending of the series. And just when you think Perrineau is about to make a Lost joke…

Speaking of not going there, despite the band branching out into other parties like bar mitzvahs, house parties, and cooperate events, it is a bit disappointing they do not “go there” like Party Down did with their off the wall parties. Sure, since this is TBS and not pay cable, I do not expect them o play an orgy, but I was hoping for gigs more creative than “adult prom”. Wedding Band does have plenty of funny moments and there is an air of what song are they going to pull from their musical quiver next and in what style. But I am not sure it is appointment viewing, especially on a Saturday night, even is Wade is very endearing in her role. But maybe if the show is successful enough, there will be an Armageddon It spin off. Now that is a show I would watch every week.

Wedding Band airs Saturdays at 10:00 on TBS.