The Voice Season 5 Blind Auditions Power Rankings

After a weak first episode, the second two hours of The Voice was filled with a few memorable Blind Auditions, but after that there were three more episodes of wondering where the wow moments were. Last season, I did not think any of the singers who have made it to the top six of season three. But this season is lacking so much talent; I think only one or two singers this season would have made the top eight last season. The two cycles a year is really starting to water down the talent pool. Mark Burnett may want to take a page out of his other show Survivor and start bringing back artists that should have made it further than they did, and not just the Blind Audition rejects like they have for the last couple seasons. Usually after each Blind Audition, I make a list of Contestants That Deserve a Second Shot, but other than Malford Milligan, even none of this season’s rejects really deserve another go around on the show. Hopefully there are more than usual amounts of breakout moments in the Battle (which is a rarely) and Knockout Rounds. Until then, here are the Power Rankings for the fifth season Blind Auditions.

1. Holly Henry (Team Blake): When Holly popped up in a promo for this season, I pondered out loud to the internet, “Is it too soon to call the chick who sings The Scientist the winner of this season of The Voice?” After seeing the full ninety seconds audition, the answer is a resounding yes. The sweet coffee house female indie singers have done fairly well on the show, and usually dominate the iTunes chart each season (but usually ends up losing to someone the bored housewives will call in for but will never buy their music for) and Holly definitely fits that lineage. Either her or Preston had the best selling Blind Auditions song this season by a pretty sizable margin. But Holly actually actual power in her voice that none of her predecessors have had since Dia Frampton back in the first season. The way she delivered “nobody said it was easy” was just beautiful (and was the very reason they used it in the ad). And aside from her voice, I really like everything else about her. I really hope she gets a chance to play her instruments down the line. Plus Holly Henry is a very strong name, the kind that could be a love interest turned superhero in her own right in a comic book. She also looks like a younger, blonder Emma Stone and Holly even exudes the same awkward confidence that Emma has. It goes without saying Stone is one of the greatest living human beings currently walking the planet. My one worry is she went with Blake who just last season went straight country. I had to cringe when Blake talked about how well he has done with singer-songwriters in the past considering he railroaded Caroline Glaser off his team in the Battle Rounds last season. Here is hoping Blake keeps to his word that he is going to “mix things up this season” and helps her to the heights that Dia got in the first season. But where Dia came in second Holly could very well be the first of the coffee-house type singers that wins the whole thing.


2. Cole Vosbury (Team Cee-Lo): Dude came on national television in 2013 and performed The Theme to the Jefferson’s on a singing competition. After the song ended, he really should have just said, “Let’s do this Cee-Lo.” Then drop the mic and walk off stage. This was the second coolest Blind Audition in the history of the series after Lindsey Pavao. I do not know how he tops this but if he goes home prematurely, please give him and his grandmother a reality show.

3. Caroline Pennell (Team Cee-Lo): It is hard to listen to her and not think of last season’s Caroline, Caroline Glaser, They both have sweet soothing, unique voices that could interpret anything. They both showed up to their Blind Audition looking like their raided their grandmother’s closet (Glaser then showed up to the Battle Rounds with a hippie chic makeover, so let’s see what changes are in store for Pennell). It was also extremely endearing how she was noticeably taken aback when the crowd started to cheer and then when the coaches turned around. That is nice for the Blind Auditions, but if she does not learn to keep that under control by the next round, it could be a quick exit. It is lucky she picked Cee-Lo because had she went with Blake she would have had to fight Holly for the quirky teen spot. I would like to see them both in the Live Show. But she did end up with compitition for that spot on Cee-Lo's team.

4. Austin Jenckes (Team Blake): He reminds me a southern version of Ryan Innes from last season (despite from actually being from Washington State). When you can mix a soulful voice with that southern grit that can be a powerful combination. Here is hoping he does not do some weird version of a Gavin DeGraw song in the Knockout Round like Ryan did last season.

5. Matthew Schuler (Team Christina): A rugby singing back dude who likes obscure Young the Giant songs. I’m in. Easily the most likeable guy this season so far. My only problem is that he is a bit of an over-singer and I am never a fan of the vocal gymnasts on the show. And being on Christina’s team is the worst place for that. Plus her teams in the first and third season were laughably bad and her one season where she had the strongest team ended up with the most boring finalist that year and another last place finish. Hopefully she does not mess this up. Or maybe she will and Matthew gets stolen by a better coach.

6. Preston Pohl (Team Adam): Just pure raw emotion, but I wonder if he can keep it up for ten weeks in a row if he makes it to the Live Rounds. Just last year, Midas Whale gave the most passionate performance of the Blind Auditions but ended up flaming out by the Knockout Rounds. I do hope at some point Cee-Lo has a chance to steal Preston because he will be better suited to finding songs that will fit him than Adam probably will.

7. Ray Boudreaux (Team Blake): A nice bluesy voice and being from New Orleans gives him a little extra spice you do not expect.

8. Juhi (Team Cee-Lo): A very fun performance but I still came away wanting a little more (which may be some experience, something that is hard to gain fast). Hopefully she busts out some Nirvana or Sublime later in the season if she makes it that far. It is weird to think Cee-Lo has two teenage girls. Blake, who turned around for both, usually has the teenage demographic cornered and Cee-Lo would be the last of the four judges you would expect to recruit young girls.

9. Will Champlin (Team Adam): If he does not sing Hard Habit to Break at some point in this season I will be very disappointed.

10. Lupe Carroll (Team Cee-Lo): The only aspect of his performance that was disappointing was that he did not bring out his wife to play cello with him. Maybe he is saving that for the Live Shows if he makes it that far.

11. Grey (Team Adam): With the unfortunate arm tattoo, country beginnings, and Kelly Clarkson song you have to think of Cassadee Pope. But she ended up going with Adam instead of Blake. Cee-Lo did hit it a little too much on the head calling her plain. That may have been the bland song selection, but with better choices in songs, she could end up being a second tier Cassadee which may very well be good enough to make it far this season.

12. Tamara Chauniece (Team Cee-Lo): Whenever an RnB singer comes from the church it shows because they have an extra passion which puts Tamara at the top of the best RnB singers this season.

13. Barry Black (Team Adam): The voice is the greatest instrument on the planet and really besides whistling, no one uses it for any other reason than singing. So Barry earns big points for busting out the vocal horn. It is too bad Cee-Lo did not turn around because that would be a much better fit then Adam who will probably use Barry as Battle Round fodder. If so, hopefully Cee-Lo uses his steal wisely. If not, he can also join the percussion section of a group on The Sing-Off.

14. Kat Robichaud (Team Cee-Lo): Right off the bat Cee-Lo got his rock chick ala Juliet Simms, who went to the finals with him two seasons ago. But I was never a fan of the whiskey soaked voices like Juliet’s and Kat is much more palatable. I do worry she will go too far over the top and with Cee-Lo as her coach that will undoubtedly happen.

15. Donna Allen (Team Adam): She has that strong voice that only comes with experience and she does have the spunk of the teenagers on the show. Not the best song selection, it is not the best idea to sing a song with only two lines on a show like this.

16. Monika Leigh (Team Blake): She had some probable in her low end (a new critique I learned this season), but when she went up it was solid. Plus I am down with any white chick who will bust out some BB King. If Blake keeps her in that sultry zone of her first performance, it should work in her favor.

17. Jonny Gray (Team Cee-Lo): A good voice and vibe about him, I do not think the song choice suited him very well. There is a flamboyance to Brandon Flowers voice and Jonny played too straight. With the right song he can be a contender with the right songs and with Cee-Lo as his coach he will either find the greatest songs for him, or pick songs that will bomb massively, there is really any middle ground with decisions Cee-Lo makes.

18. Matt Cermanski (Team Adam): To show just how low the talent level is this season, Matt did not make a team last season and deservedly so, he did not even make my list of Contestants That Deserve Another Shot, and he was only slightly better this season and was one of the better singers this season. Though I do not know why he broke out a guitar for Have a Little Faith in Me unless it was a shameless attempt to court the mom votes who love white guys with guitars. Which is a good strategy, The Swon Brothers inexplicably rode that wave to the finals last season.

19. Stephanie Anne Johnson (Team Christina): Maybe not the best song choice (and probably the wrong pick in coaches, I think Stephanie could have gone further with Cee-Lo) but there is definitely a lot there. I am really interesting in hearing sing more of a power ballad type song.

20. Jacquie Lee (Team Christina): This is the third straight season someone sang Back to Black and it is weird to think this is the first time a female sang it. It is just as weird to hear a sixteen year old girl sing a song with so much pathos. There was nothing bad to say about her performance but there really is nothing good to say. It was just a solid high school talent show performance. Like almost every other teenager that has tried out for their show, Jacquie probably should have waited until she had some more experience under her belt before trying out for the show. She probably could have gone further in a couple years than she will probably make it this season.

21. Destinee Quinn (Team Christina): She ranks very high on the likeability scale (which can go a long way on this show and helped Blake to three straight wins). Bonus points for the Alice Cooper shout-out. But I found her performance widely inconsistent and that is probably the very reason why Blake Shelton, who is very picky when it comes to country singers, did not turn around. But when she was good, she was great and if she can iron out her inconsistencies, she could be a contender in the Live Shows.

22. James Wolpert (Team Adam): Cool song selection but I was a bit surprised all four coaches turned around for him (I said that a lot this season). It probably does not help that this guy reminds me of the guy who was on Adam’s team the first season who name I cannot be bothered to remember or even look up.

23. Michael Lynch (Team Christina): A very fun performance even though it came across as a little wedding singer-y. But it is hard not to be down with a white Irish dude who sings in Spanish.

24. James Irwin (Team Adam): I was not a fan of the arrangement and I wonder if everyone would have turned around if they had waited until it started to get loud. It did not seem like Adam liked it and even made a strong critique about it and all the choaches looked stoned faced by the end of his performance nor really fought for him. For some reason James still went with him because he is “a rocker at heart.” Um, that is a bit of a stretch, rock guys would be better off going with Cee-Lo (think Jamar Rogers) or Blake (think Terry McDermott).

25. Olivia Henken (Team Christina): Another hot country chick that Blake did not turn for that ended up on Christina’s team so there will be an obvious Battle Round showdown with Destinee. Oops, Battle Pairings are out and oddly they are not going against each other. It will be interesting if either improve enough to get Blake to steal. But then again Cee-Lo may steal one of them to put them in “professional” positions.

26. Shawn Smith (Team Cee-Lo): Just a fun performance. Interesting enough, during Cee-Lo’s last season, he picked someone who sang a southern rock song with the last pick of the Blind Auditions and Cody Belew ended up making it a couple rounds into the Live Shows. Shawn could very well be Cee-Lo’s last minute dark horse again.

27. Josh Logan (Team Christina): He sounded like he was trying just way too hard to sound like Alex Clare but came up way short. When someone comes on the show and does a straight karaoke version, and not even a great karaoke version, I do not expect them to stick around very long.

28. Tessanne Chin (Team Adam): This reminded me a lot of Sasha Allen’s performance of the same song last season. There is why Amber Carrington crushed Sasha in the Battle. Sasha, like Tessanne, went 0 to 60 in about five second and stayed there through the whole performance, there is no artistry is being loud throughout an entire performance. She better learn dynamics quick or she could also lose to an underdog in the next round and there may not be anyone there to Steal her like Sasha.

29. Ashley DuBose (Team Adam): Like Tessanne before her, Ashley also closed out her episode singing a bland pop song and did not add anything special to it and then picked Adam. Adam took two powerhouse pop singers to the Live Shows last season, but Sarah Simmons and Judith Hill actually took risks with their song selections. And if America quickly got tired of them, I see America meeting Tessanne and Ashley with a resounding yawn one the voting starts. Luckily for them, the field is weaker this season, so I would not write either off completely.

30. Timyra-Joi (Team Christina): She really should have gone Cee-Lo. With him, Timyra could have done something interesting, with Christina, she will just have her sing dated Whitney, Mariah covers until the voting public gets bored, which will probably happen after a week.

31. Lina Gaudenzi (Team Christina): As I complain all the time, it is not a good idea to perform song that was performed on the show before and done much better and Suzanna Choffel sang Landslide much better because Suzanne has a little extra to her voice. Lena started out as the sweeter version but in the middle started doing way too much to the song.

32. R. Anthony (Team Cee-Lo): Does this guy really want to go by "R."? For a guy who was in a gospel group, you would think he would want to distance himself from Mr. Kelly. But Mr. Anthony's audition ended a lot better than it started.

Even though one person wins, it is fun at this point to see who has the strongest team. So I gave a numerical value to ever contestant, one point for the person in last and forty-eight for number one (I did rank all 48 contestants but only listed 32 because that is the number that will advance to the Knockout Rounds and there really was not much to say about the bottom sixteen, half that were montage; I did listen to the iTunes previews of the montaged singers to properly rate them). And here is how each team stacked up:

Cee-Lo - 333
Adam – 329
Christina – 258
Blake – 256

So as it stands, Cee-Lo and Adam have a significant lead over Christina and Blake. The problem with Blake’s team is that it is very bottom heavy, but if he chooses wisely and trims his fat, it will look much better for him coming out of Battle Rounds because between Holly, Austin, and Ray, I think he can nab two finalist spots for the third straight year. Christina on the other hand will have to use her steals wisely because she only has one person in my top ten and three in the top twenty (and two are at nineteen and twenty).

But who cares what I think. Let us look at what the music buying public thinks about this season’s contestants. Here is how they rank on the iTunes charts at their highest point on the chart in parentheses (or the highest I saw it at) with artists still in the top 1500 as of Sunday evening in bold.

1. Preston Pohl (21)
2. Holly Henry (23)
3. Matthew Schuler (79)
4. James Wolpert (110)
5. Caroline Pennell (190)
6. Matt Cermanski (213)
7. Tessanne Chin (219)
8. Jonny Gray (265)
9. Ashley DuBose (286)
10. Austin Jenckes (298)
11. Will Champlin (319)
12. Ray Boudreaux (350)
13. Brandon Chase (352)
14. Lupe Carroll (374)
15. Michael Lynch (461)
16. Josh Logan (463)
17. James Irwin (477)
18. Grey (515)
19. Jacquie Lee (517)
20. E.G. Daily (523)
21. Monika Leigh (573)
22. Timyra-Joi (618)
23. Nic Hawk (631)
24. Destinee Quinn (639)
25. Brian Pounds (757)
26. R. Anthony (789)
27. Justin Chain (810)
28. Lina Gaudenzi (880)
29. Shawn Smith (908)
30. Sam Cerniglia (976)
31. Brianna Cuoco (991)
32. Olivia Henken (1008)
33. Barry Black (1033)
34. Cole Vosbury (1087)
35. Tamara Chauniece (1229)
36. Jacob Poole (1239)
37. Shelbie Z. (1313)
38. Juhi (1373)
39. Stephanie Anne Johnson (1366)

It should be noted that those top five are currently still the only ones still in the top 1500 and still in that order except James leapfrogged Michael. It also looks like the music buying public did not care for Cee-Lo’s team as much as I did (seriously, what is wrong with America that they do not want to own a countrified version of The Jefferson's Theme Song?); he only had three singers in the top twenty-five of this season with four who did not even make the top 1500. Most shockingly was Kat who probably got the best edit by producers on his team this season and seems to be a lock for the live shows. George and Cee-Lo’s two montaged contestants also failed to make the list. Blake’s two montages were the only ones not here along with one of Christina’s montage contestants, surprisingly her other one, Jacob just cracked the list. Adam did not have any of his team members montaged (Adam got the contestant that closed out the first four episodes and none of his picks were montaged; gee, I wonder who the producers want to win this season) but Donna Allen and Justin Blake failed to make the list. If you use the same formula that I used with to decide who had the strongest team using my power rankings, here are the strongest teams based on the iTunes charts.

Adam – 271
Blake – 203
Christina – 175
Cee-Lo – 131

Not surprisingly Adam has the strongest team with five of the top ten on iTunes with Cee-Lo far behind everyone else. Now it is prediction time. Presuming there will still be two steals in the Battle Rounds and one in the Knockout Rounds, which means each team will go into the Live Shows with five members. If you just count the first five members of each team on my power rankings, you will see who I hope makes the Live Shows, but here is who I predict will make the Live Shows. I am going to go ahead and pick five members from each team not taking into accounts steal mostly because Adam is the only one of these four to take a Steal to the Live Shows and I have a sinking suspicion that most, if not all the coaches will steal back someone they dumped in the Battle Rounds for their Knockout Round steal (though Christina, and looking at the iTunes charts Cee-Lo too should take a steal or three to the Live Shows). I rank each team from most to least confident they will make the Live Shows.

Adam: Tessanne, James W., Preston, Ashley, Will
Blake: Holly, Austin, Ray, Shelbie, Monika
Cee-Lo: Kat, Jonny, Caroline, Cole, Tamara
Christina: Matthew, Timyra, Olivia, Josh, Jacquie

And for an extremely too premature prediction of the finals (did anyone have Danielle, Michelle, and / or the Swon Brothers on the finals after the Blind Auditions last season? I had all three not making the Live Shows) I am guess it will be the same as the last two seasons with Blake having two finalists, Holly and Austin, with the token RnB coach Cee-Lo taking the other spot with Jonny rounding out the finals. Christina will lose all her team members first while Adam hates America for dumping his powerhouse singers before the finals.

Last season, you had to go through the Battle Round promo like a Zapruder film to figure out five battle pairings, but this season, the promo Monday and the lengthy preview Tuesday, you could tell all but two battle pairings and oddly both are on Blake’s team (E.G., Cilla, and Sam were the only ones that got zero Battle Round promo screen time while a single tight shot on Holly did not reveal who she is going against, though you could tell she was standing next to someone in an off-white sweater and in an online video about Cher, Cilla is shown hugging Cher in a similar looking sweater). They even revealed a bunch of what songs they are singing. Here are 22 of the 24 battle pairing (who I think will win is listed first).

Adam
Matt vs. James I. (Counting Stars)
Ashley vs. Justin (Just a Fool)
Gray vs. Nic (Domino)
James W. vs. Will (Radioactive)
Tessanne vs. Donna
Preston vs. Barry

Blake
Shelbie vs. Justin (Don't You Wanna Stay)
Ray vs. Monika (Some Kind of Wonderful)
Austin vs. Brian (To Love Somebody)
Emily vs. Brandon
Holly vs. Cilla (I think)
If I am right above, that leaves E.G. vs. and Sam

Cee-Lo
Kat vs. R. Anthony (I Don't Want to Miss a Thing)
Caroline vs. Anthony (As Long As You Love Me)
Johnny vs. Shawn (Refugee)
Cole vs. Lupe
Juhi vs. George
Tamara vs. Keaira

Christina
Matthew vs. Jacob (My Songs Know What You Did In the Dark (Light Em Up))
Josh vs. Michael (Harder to Breathe)
Timya vs. Amber (Listen)
Olivia vs. Stephanie
Destinee vs. Lina
Jacqui vs. Brianna

They may have even tipped their cap as to two contestants that got stolen, there is someone who looks like a brunette chick who kind of looks like Briana (plus there is a shot of her sister Kaley losing her mind again in the promo) and a very fuzzy looking blond chick who I originally thought was Olivia when I first saw it but am unsure upon second (and tenth) examination who both who get stolen by Adam. But is Adam really going to use both of his steals on Christina rejects. Oddly both Blake and Cee-Lo try to steal one of hers on the Knockout Round.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 10/13/13

Once Upon a Time: That is the second time in as many episodes where someone who lived in the real world told someone stuck in fairytale land about how they are depicted in pop culture. At least they pointed out how absurd it is to have cast an Abercrombie model as Captain Hook when everyone knows him as an old dude with a bad perm. Neverland expands next week with the inclusion of Tinkerbell (those are some heavy wings to fill after Julia Roberts and Keira Knightley) which begs the question when will the Indians show up?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: Now there is the Carrie that was severely missing last season: off her meds and being driven crazy by her job. The crazier Carrie gets, the more entertaining the show is. At the end of season one I pondered how they would possibly let Carrie back into the CIA, but after having her committed, I am not sure what would be less likely, that the CIA would take her back after her escapade in the loony bin or if Carrie would be willing to go back after completely throwing her under the bus complete with an involuntary stay in a mental health facility. Granted I am sure they will be brought back together some how to track down Brody who was thankfully completely absent this week.

Revenge: If Aiden really wanted revenge on Emily, why not tell Victoria that she is really David Clarke’s daughter? That seems like the quickest way to bringer down, blow her cover. But we did get the first takedown of the season and I really cannot remember the last time she pulled out the red Sharpie. It created an interesting conundrum of whether to take down someone who clearly has repented.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Masters of Sex: So who told Beau Bridges that the study moved to, um, copulation? If Dr. Haas did not do it like he says (not that I believe him) that would only leave the two, um copulating. Neither of which I would assume would admit to such a thing especially to their boss. But it is becoming pretty clear that Betty the prostitute is quickly becoming the break out star of the show, she always has a funny comment whenever she opens her mouth. I am sure there is a hooker joke in there somewhere, but I will just leave it be.

The Voice: Forget Kaley Cuoco, holy Neil McDonough sighting! That should squash the conspiracy theories that producers told the coaches to turn for Briana just because she had a famous sister (not to mention the son of the guy who brought Tijano music to America failed to turn a chair). And the dude was also the son of The Commodores drummer. Who knew the Commodores had a white drummer?

I wonder if the “Best of the Blind Audition” were just that or a preview of whom we can expect in the Live Shows. I would actually live with the twelve singers featured if that were the case although I was a bit surprised that Josh Logan and Nic Hawk were featured. I guess Christina does not have much else to spotlight, but it is hard to think Nic can make it two rounds with all the ringers currently on Adam's team. It does seem like there will be five singers per team this season because the show finally took my advice to add at least one Steal to the Knockout Rounds (last season would have been much more palatable if Ryan Innes, Midas Whale, Mary Miranda, and Luke Edgemon). Though I have a feeling most of the coaches will just end up stealing someone they just dumped in the Battle Rounds. My post-Battle Rounds Power Rankings are coming tomorrow and looking at the talent as a whole, this season may not be pretty. There really is only one person worth rooting for.


You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs performed this week with the widget at right.

The Blacklist: It is nice to see that Lizzie decide to look into her fiancée’s gun, so what exactly has that gun been used for to get it redacted by Homeland Security? And who was the dude with the apple? I am a little apprehensive that the questions are piling up without any answers. Red’s reasoning to why he picked Lizzie was a little muddling and does not quell any theories that he is really her father and really just stoked those flames.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Blacklist on iTunes.

Castle: Congratulation for those that guessed Kate would be back with the NYPD by the fourth episode (assuming she is welcomed back, but there will be no show if she is not; sorry dude who replaced her who’s name I did not bother to learn), I had it happening in this episode. Oh well. And if you are going to do a Saved by the Bell rip off, why not just get Screech and A.C. Slater to reprise their roles? I cannot image they are busy.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: It is becoming pretty clear what this show is missing, aside from the obvious better actors (can someone please show the token hot chick how to tell a joke), it really needs a Big Bad to battle. I am not sure if Joss Whedon created the idea of a Big Bad, but he certainly perfected it. I wonder if the scientist that Coulsen scarified will become one. He did look like the Silver Surfer when he reached out of the Gravitonium ball. Although I am not sure if a television show has a big enough to do the Silver Surfer (or something like it) very often.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Sons of Anarchy: I have come to expect disturbing scenes on the show, and this one probably does not make the top ten most disturbing scenes in the show’s history, but the guard forcing Clay and Gemma to have sex in front of them was pretty disturbing. I put the over / under on number of episodes until somebody actually does kill those guards at three. I would have put it at one but they may have more pressing matters after their clubhouse went boom.
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water: Wow. Calab had to have one of the ballsiest moves in Tribal Council history, definitely the ballsiest that did not involve an Immunity Idol. Dude just called his shot like Babe Ruth, obviously the girls quickly jumped on board and eventually Vytas (and almost Hayden) joined him to get rid of Not-Dante Culpepper. And it was the right move. Not-Dante’s reasoning to get rid of John was because his loved one was not on a tribe and then outright said at Tribal that it would be wise to vote out someone who is unattached in the game. At that point you have to turn on Not-Dante before he turns on you. And he had to do it right there while Ciera gave him the numbers, it would have been harder to after she was gone, even harder had Brad turned on him at that Tribal which Caleb could not be completely sure was the case. And Ciera still being in the game is amazing. She is the very reason her tribe lost three of their four challenges, two of which they had a sizeable lead in.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Blood vs. Water on iTunes.

Ironside: There is nothing more awesomely cheesy than when detectives on cop shows have an epiphany almost completely out of nowhere. Ironside may have actually had the most absurd epiphany ever when his jump off mentioned Britney Spears which made him think of some missing girl from a decade ago in a Mandy Moore Christina Aguilera that looked like a witness who fled a crime scene. Wow. That is a humongous leap for a dude in a wheelchair. The show may only air one or two more episodes, but I am going to enjoy all of them. Hopefully there is more Casey Cartwright shoved dudes faces into pasta.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Ironside on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: How dare Amy besmirch the good name of Indiana Jones? I never cared for her inclusion on the show and now I am actively hating her.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Once Upon a Time in Wonderland: Wow there were some glaring plot holes from the start that were even bigger than the rabbit’s portal. Since the Knave started out in Storybrooke, that means this Wonderland should adhere to the same rules. That means Wonderland should have been frozen in the time between Emma being born and until she showed up in Storybrooke which was about thirty years. Yet somehow young Alice traveled Wonderland sometime in the nineties and then again recently as a teenager. And wasn’t it already established that Regina’s mother was the Red Queen? And now with no explanation she is a hot young blond with an accent (I just brought up the whole Captain Hook / Abercrombie model thing). No wonder why ABC put the show on during its death slot.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time in Wonderland on iTunes.

Best of the Week: 10/12/13

Quote of the Week: Normally we have naked cootchies lined up on the sink… but its slow. (Betty DiMello, Masters of Sex)

Song of the Week: Hey Man, Nice Shot – Filter (The Blacklist)

Scene of the Week:


Big News of the Week: A New Low: During the Republican primaries, as the candidates tried to out-crazy each other (I’ll see your Herbert Cain and raise you a Michelle Bachman) I floated a conspiracy theory that some of them were actually Manchurian Candidates placed by the Democrats to make the Republicans look unelectable except to the crazies in the south. And it worked, even though Barck Obama did a poor job in his first term, a poor Obama seemed more palatable than the crazy courting Mitt Romney.

You would think after the loss, the Republicans would disown the crazy wing of the party, but nope, they doubled down as if they want another four to eight years of President Clinton. They spent years of complaining that Obamacare would destroy the economy, and instead trying to fix it, waited their time trying to defund it over seventy times (you know, because fifty just is not enough) and even shut down the government which actually is hurting the economy months before Obamacare even goes into effect. So Obamacare did ruin the economy, but instead of being Obama’s fault, it lies at the feet of the Republicans. And now the Republican party has the lowest approval rating (28%) ever reported by Gallop since they started asking the question back in 1992. They also have a record high disapproval rating at 60%. For comparison the Democrats are at 43% approval and 49% disapproval. (All ratings have a margin of error of +/-4). So Republicans, stop being idiots, it is getting you nowhere. You have two years to shape up so we do not get stuck with a President Clinton because as we saw with President Bush’s, the sequel is significantly worse than the original.

Preview Picture of the Week:

“Salvage” Sons of Anarchy, Tuesday at 10:00 on FX

Free Download of the Week: Broken Over You – Vertical Horizon (NoiseTrade)

Deal of the Week: The Zombie Sale: Up to 51% Off: Zombieland, multiple Resident Evil movies, Zombie Strippers

New Album Release of the Week: Magpie And The Dandelion - The Avett Brothers

New DVD Release of the Week: Pacific Rim

Video of the Week: You will have to wait about another nine months until the season four premiere of Falling Skies, but you can check out the first look now which features even more bad apocalypse hair, a creepy military school, a new creepy hot blonde now that Karen is presumably dead, and what sound like a new enemy for the humans to fight (which may have something to do with the new creepy hot blonde) . The only thing missing is the creepy baby turned creepy grade schooler. Granted by the time the season starts, she may be a creepy teenager.



Next Week Pick of the Week: The Walking Dead, Sunday at 9:00 on AMC: During the boring farm season, everyone who read the graphic novel kept saying, wait until they get to the prison and meet the Governor. We got a glimpse of the prison at the end of season two and meet the governor shortly into the third season. And it really was not worth the wait. But as long as there are some gruesome zombie deaths, it is hard to get too disappointed with The Walking Dead.

Around the Tubes: 10/11/13

I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on Austin City Limits, Gold Fever, HBO documentaries, American Blackout, Held Hostage, Homeward Bound, casting news, Cold Justice, Hillary Barleaux, and King of the Nerds.


- French band Phoenix make their Austin City Limits (ACL) debut in an epic, career-spanning full-hour episode that showcases their impeccably crafted rock. The brand new episode, part of ACL's just-launched Season 39, premieres October 12th. ACL airs weekly on PBS stations nationwide (check local listings for times) and full episodes are made available online at acltv.com immediately following the initial broadcast.

- The mini-series Gold Fever makes its television premiere on the Discovery Channel tonight at 9:00. The year is 1848: not long after the Revolutionary War. The country is still very young and dirt poor, a nation of farmers. And then, suddenly gold is discovered in California, and the new American dream is born. Over the course of a few years, Americans would discover the modern equivalent of $25 billion dollars — money that would give a jolt to the economy and make America the most powerful nation on Earth: the government could build an army and businesses had the capital they needed to create huge industrial empires unlike anything America (or the world) had ever seen.

- This Monday, HBO will be premiering a trio of new short documentaries. Directed by Oscar-winner Cynthia Wade, Mondays at Racine (9:00) tells the uplifting story of sisters Cynthia and Rachel who own a beauty salon in Long Island, New York, which they open free of charge to cancer patients once a month on Mondays. Redemption (9:40) follows a cast of characters from the five boroughs of NYC as they scrape together a living – five cents at a time. Emmy-winning filmmakers Jon Alpert and Matthew O’Neill followed several men and women over the course of a year. Open Heart (10:20) is the story of eight Rwandan children who embark on a life-saving journey to receive open-heart surgery in Africa’s only free, state-of-the-art cardiac hospital, the Salam Center in Sudan.

- On Sunday, October 27, at 9 p.m. ET/PT, the lights will go out. American Blackout, National Geographic Channel’s two-hour, edge-of-your-seat movie event imagines the story of a national power failure in the United States caused by a cyberattack — told in real time, over 10 days, by those who kept filming on cameras and phones. You’ll learn what it means to be absolutely powerless. Check out the trailer here.

- Held Hostage, a new one-hour documentary special on PBS, details for the first time the real and full story behind the al-Qaeda-affiliated terrorist attack in Algeria on the In Amenas gas facility, which was jointly operated by Algerian and European energy companies, including BP. The program, premiering Tuesday, October 22, 2013, at 9:00 p.m. ET on PBS (check local listings), raises unanswered questions about the attack: How did a convoy of terrorists travel undetected hundreds of miles and gain control of one of Algeria’s most important and valuable gas facilities? Ultimately, who is responsible for the safety of the facility’s workers?

- On, Sunday, November 10th, 2013, Veterans Day weekend, Alan Alda and Joe Mantegna will host Homeward Bound, a live four-hour national telethon to support American veterans suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI). Presented by Haven from the Storm and broadcast by the Military Channel (Discovery Communications) the telethon will be broadcast from the historic American Legion Hall #43 in Hollywood from 7:00-11:00 PM (ET), with phone banks manned by veterans, celebrities, and dignitaries. Multiple Emmy-winner Gary Smith is executive producer, Lee Miller is producer and Gail Purse is co-producer/talent executive.

- In casting news, AnnaLynne McCord (90210, Nip/Tuck) is set for a multiple-episode guest-starring role on TNT's hit series Dallas as Heather, a 20-something ranch hand with a troubled ex-husband and a 5-year-old son. RJ Mitte (Breaking Bad) will have a recurring role in the upcoming season of Switched at Birth as Campbell, a pre-med college student paralyzed by a snowboarding accident who works in the free clinic with Daphne. Jennie Garth will join her former co-star, Tori Spelling, in the ABC Family pilot Mystery Girls. And Jeri Ryan (Star Trek: Voyager, Body of Proof) is set to join Syfy’s newest original scripted series Helix for a multi-episode arc as the beautiful and charismatic Constance Sutton, the Chief Operating Officer of Ilaria Corporation, owner of Arctic Biosystems, the research facility where the series takes place.

- In renewal news, TNT has booked a second season of its gripping, real-life crime series Cold Justice. The network has ordered 10 new episodes of the powerful docu-drama which is planned for early 2014.

- Brooklyn based singer-songwriter Hillary Barleaux releases first single “Promise to Never” off her upcoming self-titled debut album. Take a listen below:



- King of the Nerds does not return until January, but TBS recently announce one contestant, and it is the one you voted as The People’s Nerd. Meet Josh Wittenkeller below:

Previewing Made in America

Festivals have been a big thing over in England for year, but for most of last decade there was really only Bonaroo and Coachella, and even those two for the most of their existence were thought as hippie festivals for jam bands. I am guessing the disaster that was Woodstock ’99 had something to do with it. But ever since Lollapalooza was re-imagined as a festival putting up roots in Chicago that there have been more and more of them popping up every year.

Just last year Philadelphia got its own festival Made in America founded by hip-hop impresario Jay-Z. Where other festivals are very rock heavy events and a token rapper or two, with Jay-Z creating the artist list, the festival ended up being the most diverse lineup ranging from rap to rock to RnB to EDM to blues. Jay-Z even managed to wrangle Ron Howard to direct a documentary for the inaugural Made in America festival which will debuts tomorrow on Showtime at 9:00.

Taking place in the middle of the city, Philadelphia is an important part of the film as we meet the worker at the festival from the stage crew to the food vendors (unfortunately for the documentary, the festival seemed to come off without a hitch as conflict is much more entertaining). Howard even interviews a neighbor to the festival who describes the “bang-bang music” coming in through the windows.

But the heart of the Made in America festival and documentary is the music where you will get a behind the scenes look at many of the artists who played last year. This includes the first performance together by the surviving members of Run-DMC in a decade. Ron Howard gets a DJ lesson from Skrillex who turns out to be much more interesting than his music. The best behind the scenes segment is Janelle Monáe who’s life story is the epitome of Made of America. You also will go behind the scenes with Pearl Jam, Odd Future, D'Angelo, The Hives, Santigold, and get snippets of sets by Gary Clark Jr., Dirty Projectors, Passion Pit, and Jill Scott. Unfortunately you will also have to sit through a lengthy segment featuring Rita Ora. Seriously Jay-Z, stop trying to make Rita Ora happen. You already gave us Rihanna, we do not need another one.

Of course the documentary ends like the festival does with the surprise appearance by Kanye West who joins Jay-Z for some Watch the Throne songs. Jay-Z- ego is on full display for most of the documentary, there is even a full segment on the Barclay’s Center even though Jay is no longer associated with the Nets anymore. And Jay shows up in the wings for most of the performances usually with Beyoncé by his side. That aside, Made in America is a great look at the festival for those who like me were resigned to watching on the live stream. Now you can watch it on your big screen with better speakers.

Made in America airs Friday at 9:00 on Showtime.

Feed Your iPod vol. LXXVII: Listen

Amos Lee put out an album yesterday Mountains of Sorrow, Rivers of Song and if I do not get around to reviewing it, let me quickly say it is another solid folk album from the singer-songwriter. Also Chill in the Air is probably my favorite song off the album. For those unaware of Amos Lee (his last album was number one on the Billboard charts), he came up during the same time as Ray LaMontagne and had the same laid back mountain man vibe, much more mellow than the current folk-rock boon. Though not a house hold name, he is one of those artists who gets his music placed in plenty of television shows and movies. My favorite Amos Lee song is Listen off his third album, Last Days at the Lodge which a bit darker and edgier than his previous work.

Listen – Amos Lee

Nothings Gonna Wake Me Now Cause Im a Slave to the Sound

Lorde was not the only highly buzzed about new artist to release an album last week (see my review: I'm Kind of Over Being Told to Throw My Hands in the Air). Much like Lorde, Haim built their buzz with critically adored EP and plenty of high profile endorsements (in the case of Haim wide ranging artists from Rihanna to Mumford & Sons have express support) but unlike Lorde the three sisters of Haim (and one unseen male drummer) have also build a reputation of a great live act playing basically every major festival over the past year.

Unlike Lorde whose debut album was made up almost entire of new songs, Haim does recycle half the songs on their full length first album Days Are Gone from their previous EP’s, whether this is a good thing or not depend on if you already bought the EP’s or not. Even as a listener it is a bit disappointing that much of the album is not new. But to steal the NBC’s slogan from decade, if you are just hearing of Haim for the first time, the songs are new to you.

If you are new to Haim, there is a reason why everyone from Rihanna to Mumford and Sons are championing the trio; they check almost every musical box you can think off. The first thing I heard was Falling (which is also the first track on the album) which harkens back to Southern California rock of the seventies like Fleetwood Mac, a comparison that deepens as each sister trade off lead vocals, but they also combine their voices that are reminiscent of nineties RnB. They go deep on RnB with songs like Go Deep with its penetrating bass worthy of any slow jam from two decades ago. There is also a pop sensibility of that other sibling band Hanson, but since all the members of Haim are legally able to buy beer, there is not an underlying cheesiness to them.

Haim’s influences sometime get too prevalent. Most notably on the first new single off the album The Wire which completely lifted another seventies So-Cal band The Eagles guitar riff from Heartache Tonight. And on Forever, it is hard not to hear the synthesizers from New Order’s Bizarre Love Triangle. It is a fine line between homage and stealing and Haim toes the line a little too close a couple times on Days Are Gone.

For those familiar with Haim’s previous EP’s, the group gets weird and dark on some of the newer tracks on the album which makes it more diverse than the very homogeneous Pure Heroine that Lorde put out. My Song 5 sound more like something you would hear on a Dirty Projectors album than from the group that put out the Forever EP. While Let Me Go is a menacing track to that could have been a hit on alternative rock stations back in the nineties.

Last Tuesday was the deadline for the 2014 Grammy awards which is probably why Haim and Lorde (and a few other artists) dropped their album on Monday. Both are angling for a Best New Artists nomination, which should be a lock for both, along with Kacey Musgraves as well as maybe Capital Cities, Macklemore & Ryan Lewis (assuming they are eligible, the rules for the category are fuzzy so not so new acts like Imagine Dragons and Kendrick Lamar may also be in the mix even though they do not seem very "new"). And the last two entrants may be the ones to beat next January, being fresh in a voters mind is usually a good thing. Lorde may have the inside track because of the smash Royals but Days Gone By is a much more fun album.

Song to Download – Falling

Days Are Gone gets a on my Terror Alert Scale.

I Want My Music Television: 10/7/13

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.


Dust to Dust – The Civil Wars


I got excited when The Civil Wars showed up together in the same music video thinking that have solved their differences but it turns out all the “new footage was recently found footage from 2011. Bummer.


Another Is Waiting - The Avett Brothers


Even though the song is entitled Another is Waiting and included the line, “Let me see your skeleton” I still do not see how a model being replaced by skeletons waiting in the wings really fits into The Avett Brothers song.


Kinks Shirt - Matt Nathanson


What the frack was that Matt Nathanson? The girl in the Kinks shirt was a dude!?! I know arguably the most known Kinks song is about a transvestite, but c’mon, this video was uncalled for.


High Road - Cults


The lo-fi band Cults are back with what I thought was gong to be a high concept version of the Seven Nation Army video, but it turned out to be a hodgepodge of just random ideas and images.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 10/6/13

Once Upon a Time: As Lost Boy #6 in my high school production of Peter Pan I am not very happy that they have turned Peter Pan evil. He is more Jack Merridew (the episode even featured a conch shell) than the Peter Pan we know and love. Speaking of that conch shell, was the mermaid that blew it supposed to be Aerial? They can make her evil, I do not really care.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: A quick addendum to my preview of the new season which was too spoilery. Homeland likes to throw I a game changer every couple episodes and Saul throwing Carrie under the bus may be the most shocking yet. Not only did he disclose to the whole nation that she is a crazy person, he actually lied under oath. We actually saw Saul listen to Carrie and Brody having sex last season. The fun of Homeland is watching the show to move on after completely blowing things up (sometimes quite literally) and this is an interesting set up to season three. I hope it does not end with Carrie and Brody on the lamb together. But if Saul’s testimony was the most shocking, Quinn killing the kid was the least shocking. As soon as Quinn was given the okay, I knew he would accidentally kill him, I just thought it would have been the kid under the desk, we just had to wait another thirty seconds for the murder to happen.

Revenge: The second season was rough, hard enough to sit through I was kind of hoping it would get canceled. But it came back complete with a new showrunner. Gone is Declan, Nolan’s money, The Initiative and Carrion (names of which even the characters never want to hear again). Of course we start off two months in the future (some things never change) where we see Emily shot twice in the abdomen by some unseen assailant who she trusts enough to be alone on a yacht with (my way too early prediction is the new French chick). Also gone this season (but not completely off this mortal coil) is Ashley who was sent back to her native land by the blackmailing team of Victoria and Emily. Emily even worked in some revenge essentially ending Conrad’s short run as governor of New York and making him think he has some degenerative disease that will turn him crazy (just thinking he has it will probably turn him crazy).
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Betrayal: Betrayal sounds like a title that was considered but ended up not used for Revenge. As Revenge sank like a rock last season, it is weird they would team it with a new soap heavy show. Except Betrayal is boring. It came off like the first of a twenty act movie instead of the first episode of a television show. There was probably the reason they heavily featured the last minute of the episode (essentially spoiling the whole thing) in the promos because nothing of note happened except a simpleton may have killed his uncle we barely saw for reasons that were not well explained.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Betrayal on iTunes.

The Voice: I applauded the song selection last week unfortunately some of the songs this week were less inspiring but some guy did pull out an MGMT song and another person dusted off an underappreciated song by Bill Withers. Unfortunately we did not get to see much of the first Creedence Clearwater Revival song on the show as it got montage (I do not count the times Proud Mary was performed because everyone always does the Proud Mary version). I wonder if song selection did Malford Milligan in, he did trot out the well worn Let's Stay Together. Even with the tired song, I still though he was the third best singer this week. Hopefully he gets an invite back next season. Granted they seem to only invite back cute young boys. Which begs the question, where is Jane Smith from last season? She would be a perfect fit for Cee-Lo who was not around last season.

One guy that did get the return invitation was James Irwin (who did not even make my Contestants Who Should Be Brought Back last season) who made history by being the first returnee who got all four chairs to turn around. But I wonder if the coaches were having some button remorse because his performance started out well, they all pushed their button, then sat there stone-faced went he went into the awkward rock portion of the song. After that it seemed like the least competitive fight for a four chair turner ever with Adam even giving him a harsh critique. For some reason James picked Adam and may be the first four chair turner who exists this season.

The big new this week (which is not saying much because there were a lot of weak performances) was the audition of Briana Cuoco. Okay this is mostly because of her famous sister Kaley from The Big Bang Theory. Brianna’s rendition of You and I was pedestrian at best but Kaley lost her mind (like some family members do, but Kaley over did it a bit) when Christina turned around for her sister. Hopefully Briana gets better because I would not mind having Kaley Cuoco on my television, two to three times a week for the rest of the year.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs performed this week with the widget at right.


The Blacklist: Usually with procedurals there is a big twist at the end to the point you expect it and can even guess what it is before it happened, but I never saw Isabella Rossellini turning out to be a human trafficker who rails against human trafficking to eliminate her competition (which is ingenious in an evil kind of way). But it is disappointing that it looks like Elizabeth is just going to ignore the money and passports she found under the floorboards.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Blacklist on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: A slight improvement over the premiere and that does not even take into account the cameo of Samuel L. Jackson. But yeah, Sam Jackson was awesome.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

The Goldbergs: How do you have a show set in the eighties and have a storyline about your mother buying your embarrassing clothes for the first day of school and not play, or at the very least reference Parents Just Don't Understand. Instead they end the episode with a Styx song? Epic fail.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Goldbergs on iTunes.

Sons of Anarchy: I did not think Tig would end up dead this week, but I was surprised with a test being why he survived but it does make sense (it did not make since that Pope’s men would still care about his vendetta against Tig if he was dead). But in true Sons of Anarchy fashion, you were left wondering the fate of Tig all week, he shows up alive, and then four characters die violently in the episode (and that does not even count the Nazi’s). Thankfully Otto finally met his finale fate, how he made it this long is befuddling. The big shock was the death of the Marshall, he was set up at the major antagonist and now he is completely off the board (unless there is yet another vengeful relative in their family). But the Sons have their hands full with the Irish right now.
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water: Finally a challenge the Loved Ones can win, they have most of the muscle on the guys side including a former NFL lineman who pushed around dudes for a living, while the women are going against mostly forty and fifty year olds. Making it easier, one of the stronger returnees Tyson goes out with a shoulder injury. Should be a cake walk right? Right off the bat Brad Culpepper barely beat the aging Gervase, then Katie and Ciera lose to their mothers who are twice their age. At least Ciera put up a fight against her mother, when she went against Kat, it looked like she jumped off the platform just to get away from her competitor. So in two straight seasons, the new tribe has won one team challenge total and four out of sixteen challenges in three seasons before they started to mix up the tribes. It is really time to stop it with the fans vs. favorites concept even if they include loved ones in the equation.

Or just bringing back contestants period aside a rare All-Stars season (at least five seasons apart). Case in point: Colton. The dude caused the ost eye rolling when he cast was announced. He was a character you did not even love to hate, u just hated him so much you wanted to turn the channel. But he came back and he changed, cry a bunch in the second episode but by the second episode he was spreading lies amongst his tribe and making rude comments about them in his confessional. As by the third episode, after realizing he would be first of his tribe voted out, he just up and quit even though his tribe was on a winning streak and may have never gone to Tribal Council. And if that streak continues, there may be a tribe swap sooner than later when he could have been reunited with his fiancé and rebooted his game. Instead he quits and Probst and his tribe just lit into him. Probst even went as far to say he faked his injury One World so he could leave the game. I was a little surprised Probst did not ask Caleb if he wanted to quit with Colton. I kind of wanted Caleb to say, nope, I am good here. Oh well. So good riddance Colton, not only are you a horrible person you are a quitter.

This week we finally saw some loved ones go head to head in an Immunity Challenge and next week we will see it in the Redemption Island Arena when Candice take on her husband John (with Marissa still in the mix). It is one thing to not take your loved one’s spot on Redemption Island, but are you really willing to send them home? It will be interesting if Marissa finishes first, will Candice or John just concede the game to their spouse? Though I hate the Blood vs. Water theme, I have to admit the concept sets up some interesting storylines.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Blood vs. Water on iTunes.

Modern Family: Our first Dylan sighting of the season, complete with a new haircut. Rumour has it that there is going to be a Modern Family. When I saw the headline I was hoping for a Dylan / Hayley starting a new life themed show, but unfortunately they are looking at one starring Manny's real father. Bummer.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Modern Family on iTunes.

Super Fun Night This was just an abomination. I do not know what I am going to do between Modern Family and Nashville, but it will not be watching this ever again. I implore ABC just to bring Suburgatory back now or if they do not want to out right cancel Super Fun Night, please switch it with Back in the Game, The Neighbors, or even The Goldbergs even though I have problems with that show, it is still at the very least watchable. Super Fun Night is not. ABC, you know Super Fun Night is not getting a second season already, just cut ties now before you do irreconcilable damage to Nashville's ratings when people like me flee your network as soon as Super Fun Night starts and never comes back.
If you must, you can stream episodes on Hulu. You can also download Super Fun Night on iTunes

The Bridge: Do we finally get to hear what cassette Sonya was so desperate to recover after her sister’s car was totaled and it was… I have no clue what song that was. As for the actual episode, it did not feel like a season finale it all; it more felt like a middle of a season episode. I guess that happens when you capture your big bad two episodes ago. The only plot point was that Linder’s “bride” was rescued. Sure some things were set up for a second season, the FBI let Charlotte know they are on to her just after she set up her new business with the Fausto (how her boy toy made it through the season alive was shocking). Of course Daniel stumbled onto a dead ninety-nine year old woman with a ton of cash, including Euros, stacked in her bathroom. And it looks like next season will be Marco trying to break into prison to kill David Tate. Hopefully that is more entertaining than the last couple episodes of this season.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Bridge on iTunes.

Nashville: I really liked the addition of the new singer from the reality show (and the show really needs a kick after last week’s bore of a premiere). Or more specially, I really like her as a bright eyed foil to Juliette’s jaded pop star, it looks like it will be more interesting than the Juliette / Rayna rivalry. I really liked the look on Juliette’s face when Layla said she was singing on of Juliette’s classic which was only matched by her look when the new bean counter said Layla’s song was number one on iTunes. I hope they keep Layla naïve and do not give her some deep dark secret like they give everyone on a soap opera.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: I always love it when they find a way to get Penny and Sheldon together, but I could have done without so much time with the other teams. Howard and Amy even joked how they have never spent any time together, and after this episode it may be wise never to give them screen time again even if Neil Diamond is involved.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Parenthood: This season token Friday Night Lights cameo is Jess Meriwether as Kristina’s campaign manager. You have to think Julie Taylor sits around wondering, “Why am I stuck on some crappy alien love story show on The CW with Hastings Ruckle; where is my Parenthood role?” It is odd that Lyla Garrity is the only original cast member that has been invited show but Jess is the third of the newbies to make an appearance. Jess was not the only new face this week as the dude from The Office also popped up. But I have to wonder if the show is really going to go the route where Julia ends up in the arms of the dude from The Office while Joel spends some quality time with Penny from Lost.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Parenthood on iTunes.

Best of the Week: 8/5/13

Quote of the Week: What is it you’re smoking Ms. Masterson? (Senator Andrew Lockhart, Homeland)

Song of the Week: Gonna Get Even – Layla Grant (Nashville)

Scene of the Week:


Big News of the Week: Believeland: Forget the government shutdown, there is bigger news this week: the Cleveland Browns are alone in first place for the first time in maybe two decades!!! Things looks grim here in Cleveland after the Browns traded away their top three pick from just last year (which also cost them another late round pick to boot) for what will probably be a draft pick in the teens next year signifying the sixth rebuilding year of the past fourteen seasons. Except after they traded Trent Richardson, the won two straight games to earn them a tie in the AFC Central and with a Thursday Night Football game could get them a sole place at the top with a win.

But this is Cleveland and nothing is easy. Brain Hoyer, who looked competent in his first two starts, made the most awkward looking slide ever in the first quarter which landed him a torn ACL and out for the season. So back in was Brandon Weeden, the sophomore quarterback who turns thirty later this year. Yep God hates Cleveland. Except the Buffalo quarterback got injured himself, and the Bill backup managed to be worse than Brandon completing only around five passes, and one of those was to cornerback TJ Ward, cliching the Browns win. So seriously President Obama and House Republicans, if the Cleveland Browns can be in first place during the fifth week of the season, you can hammer out a way to get the government up and running again.

Preview Picture of the Week:

"Heavy Petting" The League, Wednesday at 10:30 on FXX

Free Download of the Week: Ribs – Lorde (iTunes): Get the fifth best song off of Pure Heroine for free. But really, just buy the whole album. You can read why in my review: I'm Kinda of Over Being Told to Throw My Hands in the Air.

Deal of the Week: 100 Albums for $5: This months discounted album on Amazon MP3 include Greatest Hits packages from Tom Petty, Boyz II Men, Bruce Springsteen, and DMX.


New Album Release of the Week: Mountains of Sorrow, Rivers of Song - Amos Lee

New DVD Release of the Week: Lifeguard

Video of the Week: When I think of great reality moments, I always go back to the time CT wore Johnny Bananas as a backpack on The Challenge. This week’s Immunity Challenge on Survivor may make the list. Sure we have seen this exact challenge before on the show, the sumo pillow fight over the water or mud, but this is the first time we have seen it with relatives going against each other. There we only three same sex loved ones left on the show but they all went up against each other (I am glad Colton quit earlier in the episode, but I would have loved to see him go against Caleb, or even better NFL lineman Brad, in this). First up you have Vytas cheap shot his brother Aras and still lose, and then you had two mothers beat their daughters half their age. Laura beating Ciera was a bit understandable, Ciera is so small got knocked off the platform when Kat just sneezed on her, but Katie has over twenty-five years on her mother, a couple inches, and a quite few pounds on her mother and still lost. This was really the first time I did not hate the Blood vs. Water theme. For reference, to skip the less interesting undercard, the Ciera vs. Kat battle start at 3:00.


Next Week Pick of the Week: Once Upon a Time: Wonderland, Thursday at 8:00 on Thursday on ABC: The Once Upon a Time spin-off was originally conceived as a filler show for when the main show went on winter hiatus, but the people at ABC liked it so much that they gave it a full order and a spot on its fall lineup, one that is not even on the same night as the original show. Of course it did not like it enough to give it a better spot on it schedule than Thursdays at 8:00 where the network has failed to launch a new drama since Ugly Betty moved out of the spot in 2009. And the promos make me wonder what exactly what the execs saw because the CGI heavy sets do not look very good and instead of a Once Upon a Time spin-off, it looks like a television adaptation of Sucker Punch (which was conceived as Alice in Wonderland with guns but panned by critics).

Around the Tubes: 10/4/13

I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on Valentine Road, Homeland, Austin City Limits, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Great Performances, 13 Nights of Halloween, The Incredible Bionic Man, Living Well with Montel Williams, and Musicwood.

- HBO Documentary Films presents a weekly series this fall, debuting provocative new specials every Monday from October 7 through December 9. The first documentary starting at 9:00 Monday is Valentine Road which explores a middle school murder and its complicated aftermath. Check out a trailer below:


- If you missed it when it aired, The season three premiere episode of Homeland can be seen on the Showtime website, on YouTube, via select television providers' free On Demand channels and websites, on Showtime on Demand® and Showtime Anytime®. The season three premiere is also available on Showtime apps on iPhone®, iPod Touch®, Android smartphones and tablets, Nook® and Kindle Fire tablets, and for download as a free video podcast on iTunes.

- Austin City Limits launches its 39th Season with two of the biggest acts in Latin music today, Juanes and Jesse & Joy. Colombian superstar Juanes headlines the episode, performing a thrilling high energy set, while Mexico City’s sibling duo Jesse & Joy sing a selection of their breakthrough hits. The season premiere—the first to feature Latin artists in the debut episode—airs Saturday, October 5th and showcases ACL's long-standing commitment to feature the best in music from around the world. ACL airs on PBS stations nationwide (check local listings for times) and the full episode will be made available online at acltv.com immediately following the initial broadcast.

- Ever want to hang out with the gang from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia? Omaze and the cast of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia are teaming up to offer one lucky winner and a friend the chance to be flown into LA to visit the set, hang with the cast, watch an episode of the hit show, and of course, grab a drink at Paddy’s afterwards. The winner and their friend will learn how “The Gang” came to be, what it takes to launch and star in a hit comedy, and what it’s like to indulge in a little happy hour at an imaginary bar with real people. Roundtrip airfare and hotel arrangements are included, so all that is needed is a love for Los Angeles and a sense of humor (assuming some heroic efforts, wisecrack jokes, and Hawaiian shirts are included on set). The best part about this experience is that every entry helps the Wounded Warrior Project empower veterans recovering from combat wounds. You can enter HERE by October 18th, 2013 for their chance to win!

- The seven-week 2013 PBS Arts Fall Festival premieres Friday, October 18 with Great Performances “40th Anniversary Celebration,” a performance special that honors the iconic series with a star-studded concert at New York’s Lincoln Center. October 25 brings A Raisin in the Sun Revisited: The Raisin Cycle at Center Stage, which explores the impact of the groundbreaking play, as well as the onstage and backstage drama as Baltimore’s Center Stage company mounts two contemporary plays inspired by the original work. On November 1, Great Performances “Moby-Dick from San Francisco Opera” captures composer Jake Heggie and librettist Gene Scheer’s acclaimed adaptation of the classic Herman Melville novel with Texas-born tenor Jay Hunter Morris as the obsessive Captain Ahab.

- ABC Family has launched the “Ravenswood Reveal” app, which will release exclusive Ravenswood content every day leading up to the series premiere on October 22 at 9/8c. Also, during the East Coast broadcasts of the “Pretty Little Liars” Halloween special and the “Ravenswood” series, star Tyler Blackburn will be answering fan questions on the Ravenswood Facebook page.

The special episode of Pretty Little Liars and the premiere of Ravenswood are part of ABC Family’s 13 Nights of Halloween and you can check out the full slate of programming below (click to enlarge):

- Smithsonian Channel is the exclusive U.S. television home to chronicle the behind-the-scenes story of the world’s first real Bionic Man – a 6-foot-tall robot built entirely from bionic body parts and implantable synthetic organs – complete with a functioning circulatory system. The result of billions of dollars of research and featuring components borrowed from some of the world's leading laboratories, The Incredible Bionic Man shows how far we’ve come in efforts to simulate the human body. A new one-hour documentary about the ambitious project premieres on Smithsonian Channel on Sunday, October 20, 2013 at 9:00.

- Popular, Emmy-winning author and motivational speaker Montel Williams debuts his uniquely inspirational/motivational new show Living Well with Montel Williams via an online portal, as VOD, utilizing new media as the platform to deliver high quality, subject specific content relating to health and wellness. What viewers will recognize as traditional daytime format will be paired with in-depth educational content designed to provide a more complete user experience on livingwellwithmontel.com.

Musicwood, an acclaimed environmental/music documentary directed by Maxine Trump, opens in NYC on November 1 at the Quad Cinema. The film will also have limited screenings in markets around the country including Seattle and Chicago (dates / times available here). Musicwood is an adventure-filled journey and political thriller with music at its heart. The film follows a group of the most famous guitar-makers in the world – Bob Taylor of Taylor Guitars, Chris Martin of Martin Guitars and Dave Berryman of Gibson Guitars – as they venture into the remote Alaskan rainforest on a mission to protect the Sitka Spruce tree. Essential for the creation of high-quality acoustic guitars, old-growth Sitka Spruce are disappearing at an alarming rate as Native American loggers are clear-cutting enormous strips of the Tongass National Forest.

Previewing Witches of East End: A Dude's Review of Lifetime vol. III

In a measure of full disclose, I should first state that I am male and thus outside Lifetime’s target audience, but since the channel was nice enough to let me watch their screeners, I feel obligated to do my due diligence to promote their new programs. There latest offering is Witches of East End (witches: another source of entertainment I do not fall into the core demographic for). Please note this is not another retelling of The Witches of Eastwick, the last of which did not last a full season on ABC just four years ago. This based on another book of the same name released just two years ago.

The show follows a modern day witch, Julia Ormond (last seen in a ballroom with Roger Sterling) who has been “cursed” with immortality. But the rub is that though she stays timeless, her children keep on dying as a part of the curse, the same two children are born again right after they die because as Salam taught us, no one likes witches. So in their most recent incarnation, Julie has decided not to tell her daughters about their supernatural gift.

And then in the span of days, one daughter Jenna Dewan-Tatum (the short-lived The Playboy Club) wishes her soon to be mother-in-law to chock on an appetizer only for it to happen making her think she has some special power, which she does. While the more skeptical daughter, Rachel Boston (American Dreams) jokingly performs a fertility spell she got off the internet to help a co-worker get pregnant, which shows up with a positive test the very next day. Oh yeah, and a dude crawls out a painting in their house. Things get more complicated and secrets harder to hide when Aunt Mädchen Amick (Dream Lover) the more wild-child sibling and has the more humorous “curse”, who has not spoke with her sister since the seventies, which was long before her niece’s latest incarnation

It has to be said: Jenna Dewan-Tatum is not a good actress. I have to wonder how she even cast in this. My working theory is that the people who go to her husband’s movie are the network’s target demo so they hope older woman will see “Tatum” and hope she may be able to wrangle her husband for a guest spot. Rachel Boston is much better as the more comedic sister, especially when she starts going on about “goat orgies” and on the show does work in a library with Tom Lenk who was the best part of the later Buffy the Vampire Slayer seasons. He only gets a line or two in the Pilot but hopefully he pops up for longer in future episodes. As you may have not noticed, Lenk is the first guy I mentioned because like most Lifetime shows and movies, this one is populated with boring actors cast straight from the Ambrocrombie catalogue and as so boring they could very well just be reanimated poster cut-outs (this is a show about witches so it is possible).

But as the third Lifetime that I have given a try, Witches of East End was the most entertaining by far. And at its best it could rival Ironside for the best new hate-watching show of the fall. Unfortunately for both shows, there is plenty of good shows on this fall, there may not be any time to hate-watch anything unless you want to save it for the holiday repeats or next summer.

Witches of East End airs Sundays at 10:00 on Lifetime. You wil be able to download Witches of East End on iTunes.