Thursday, December 01, 2011

We’re Gonna Have the Hap-Hap-Happiest Christmas Since Bing Crosby Tap-danced with Danny Kaye


National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

Christmas movies are the comfort food of the holidays, with multiple days off work or school and temperature too cold to actually go outside during the Christmas vacation, it is easy to sit in front of the television with a blanket on and watch some holiday fare, and since ‘tis the season any movie with snow will do. There are few Christmas movies that are legitimately good any time of year and National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation is one of the few and this month’s induction into the Scooter Hall of Fame.

Like the first two Vacation movies, Chevy Chase (Fletch) and Beverly D’Angelo (The House Bunny) reprise themselves as the married Griswolds. And like the previous two movies, their children are played by entirely different actors; this time inexplicably Audrey became older than Rusty for the first in the film and were played by the relatively unknown at the time Johnny Galecki (Suicide Kings) and Juliette Lewis (Natural Born Killers). There was also the returning Randy Quaid (who could not make it to Europe in the previous film) who torments the Griswolds in their own home this time around.

But like every Vacation movie, no matter how many people they try to bring in to steal his thunder, the star of the movie remains Chevy Chase as the bumbling father who thinks he has a chance with a younger woman and has one massive breakdown per movie because everything that could wrong does. And there were plenty of reasons for a break down this time around from unannounced guests to a light show that does not work right. But it is the lack of a Christmas bonus (or more specifically one that turns into jello) that sends him, and Cousin Eddie, who kidnaps his Scrooge of a boss and his wife, over the edge to high comedic results.

My fondest memory of the film happened in high school when my math teacher decided to show the movie before our Christmas vacation and “forgot” to bring the School Board edit version and instead watched the full unedited version instead (actually this was a common occurrence of my teacher as we also got the real version of Monty Python and the Holy Grail in English one time). For those that do not have cool enough teachers, you can catch the movie playing on ABC Family this month on 12/7 and 12/12 both at 9:00.



Wednesday, November 30, 2011

ABC Family's 25 Days of Christmas 2011 Schedule


ABC Family's 25 Days of Christmas

It is that time of year ago when you just stay inside with a blanket on and watch Christmas specials for a month straight. And ABC Family is happy to accommodate with its 25 Days of Christmas (Harry Potter and Pixar marathons notwithstanding). Some highlights include new original movie 12 Dates of Christmas (12/11 at 8:00) starring Amy Smart and Mark-Paul Gosselaar who relive the same Christmas Eve first date over and over again Groundhog Day style until she learns to open up and stop living in the past. This year also features the ABC Family premieres of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince (12/4 at 8:30), Disney/Pixar’s Up (12/16 at 9:00) and one of the all time great holiday classics, National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation.


Thursday, December 1
(7:00) The Santa Clause


Friday, December 2
(6:00) Dr. Seuss on the Loose
(8:00) Dr. Seuss' How The Grinch Stole Christmas (Live Action)


Saturday, December 3
(All Day Long) Harry Potter Marathon


Monday, December 4
(All Day Long) Harry Potter Marathon)
(8:30) Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince


Monday, December 5
(7:00) Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer & the Island of Misfit Toys
(8:30) The Polar Express


Tuesday, December 6
(6:00) 'Twas the Night Before Christmas
(8:30) Home Alone 2: Lost in New York


Wedensday, December 7
(6:00) A Very Pink Christmas
(9:00) National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation - ABC Family Premiere


Thursday, December 8
(7:00) Frosty's Winter Wonderland
(7:30) Cranberry Christmas
(9:00) The Year Without a Santa Claus


Friday, December 9
(7:00) Santa Claus is Comin' to Town


Saturday, December 10
(All Day Long) holiday Movie Marathon
(8:00) The Santa Clause 3 - The Escape Clause


Sunday, December 11
(6:00) Holiday in Handcuffs
(8:00) 12 Dates of Christmas – A New ABC Family Original Movie


Monday, December 12
(9:00) National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation


Tuesday, December 13
(7:00) Dr. Seuss' The Cat in the Hat (Animated)
(7:30) Dr. Seuss' The Grinch Grinches the Cat in the Hat


Wednesday, December 14
(8:30) Dinsney∙Pixar’s Finding Nemo


Thursday, December 15
(9:00) Beauty and the Beast


Friday, December 17
(9:00) Dinsney∙Pixar’s Up - ABC Family Premiere


Saturday, December 18
(All Day Long) Holiday Classics Marathon
(8:00) Dinsney∙Pixar’s Toy Story


Sunday, December 18
(8:00) Dinsney∙Pixar’s Toy Story 2


Monday, December 19
(6:30) Aladdin
(8:30) Disney∙Pixar’s The Incredibles


Tuesday, December 20
(6:00) Mickey's Christmas Special
(9:00) The Polar Express


Wednesday, December 21
(7:00) Disney's Prep and Landing
(8:00) The Santa Clause


Thursday, December 22
(7:00) The Santa Clause 3 - The Escape Clause


Friday, December 23
(8:00) Dr. Seuss' How The Grinch Stole Christmas (Live Action)


Saturday, December 24
(All Day Long) Holiday Classics Marathon
(7:00) Santa Claus is Comin' to Town
(8:00) The Year Without a Santa Claus


Sunday, December 25
(8:00) The Polar Express


For those that missed ABC Family’s other new original movie this year Desperately Seeking Santa (which for some reason they premiered before Thanksgiving), you can currently watch the full movie on Hulu. Or just check it out below:



Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Previewing TNT’s Mystery Movie Night


Bill Pullman getting arrested in Innocent; but did he do it?

TNT’s Mystery Movie Night is for a certain type of person (full disclosure notice: I am not one of them) and that is for anyone who watches CBS more than any other channel. The kind of people who see Marcia Gay Harden or Alfred Molina and are instantly intrigued. The kind of people that already have a couple novels by Scott Turow already on their bookshelves. The kind of people who are, dare I say considering TNT recently canceled a similarly named show, men of a certain age.

Scott Turow’s Innocent is the basis of the first Mystery Movie Night airing tonight at 9:00. The movie follows a judge (Bill Pullman, While You Were Sleeping) whose wife (Marcia Gay Harden, The Mist), has just died under suspicious circumstances (aren’t all deaths in mystery books?) and the prosecutor (Richard Schiff, The West Wing) who was unable to pin the death of the judge’s mistress on him twenty years ago is trying to build another case to bring down him down. It does not help that the judge’s current mistress his former clerk and current girlfriend to his son. There are plenty of twist and turns you expect from a mystery movie and a ending you will not see coming (assuming you have not already read the book). But that is mostly because it may be the most boring outcome that could have been written.


Rita Morgan and Bill Lumbergh team up for Ricochet

The Mystery Movie Night returns tomorrow, also at 9:00, with Ricochet based on the book by Sandra Brown and feature actors that are a bit more endearing to men of my certain age: Rita Morgan! Bill Lumbergh!! Dwayne Motherfracking Wayne!!! Much like Innocent, Ricochet features a judge (Lumbergh) but this time around it is his wife that may have caught the infidelity bug and the detective (John Corbett, Parenthood) looking into her self defense murder of a home invader wants a piece of the action. It does not help that Lumbergh recently threw Corbett in jail for contempt after one of his cases got thrown out on a technicality. It should be noted that the Ricochet script was written by the same guy who wrote The Craigslist Killer as these early Mystery Movie Night films have a slightly classier vibe than your regular Lifetime Movies.

The Mystery Movie Night continues through December. Next Tuesday, Carla Gugino and Mark-Paul Gosselaar team up for Hide originally written in book form by Lisa Gardner. Wednesday is the premiere of Richard North Patterson’s Silent Witness starring Dermot Mulroney, Anne Heche, and Judd Hirsh. Then on Tuesday December 13 April Smith’s Good Morning, Killer gets the movie treatment starring Catherine Bell, Cole Hauser, William Devane, and Titus Welliver. And just in time for Christmas, the mother / daughter writing team of Mary and Carol Higgins Clark and their book Deck the Halls gets turned into a movie Tuesday December 20 starring Kathy Najimy, Scottie Thompson, and Larry Miller. And if you enjoy the Mystery Movie Night, you are in luck because yesterday TNT already ordered up a new movie based on Patricia Cornwell’s Hornet’s Nest and have already cast Sherry Stringfield, Virginia Madsen, and Michael Boatman and is set to air sometime in 2012.