57 Channels and Only This Is On: 11/22/15

Once Upon a Time: Well that was weird, I know that it was not designed to be a two parter but still weird of all the episodes to pair up, why these two? Why not a two part winter finale instead? The first hour was heavy into the big mystery of the season where we finally learn Emma's plan (she saved Captain Hook by turning him into another Dark One, huh, and want to put the darkness into the Wicked Witch and kill her eliminating the darkness once and for all, alrighty) but then they follow it up with two characters we have not seen for a couple seasons. Both explanations of where Mulan and Red Riding Hood were a little silly. Really all it made me do was wonder what ever happened to Cinderella and Hurley the Ogre.
You can download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: When Saul was riding down the elevator, I was thinking to myself, if this were any other spy show, he would just ninja chop everyone and the door would open with everyone else conscienceless on the floor. What actually happened was almost as absurd as a bunch of ninjas abducted him instead. So now Saul has defected to Israel. Alrighty. If the CIA really wanted him, doesn't Israel give him back? Though I am sure the season will be resolved and Saul will be vindicated before that happens. Them the episode ends with Carrie calling Allison for help. So Carrie did not recognize Allison's voice when she called Quinn's attempted assassin's phone number?

The Walking Dead: So who said "Help" at the end of the episode? It did not cross my mind that it was a not so dead Glenn until the internet reminded me he was out there. Did he even had a walkie? At any rate I still do not think it was him but an yet to be seen newbie who hijacked the frequency.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

The Affair: During the early episodes I thought that the differences in the stories were just how Noah and Allison were spinning their stories to the police, but after that blow up at Thanksgiving where Allison called out Noah for distorting her versions of what happened, I am beginning to think that Noah's version his his book and Allison's version is a tell all story she will write in the future. Of course then that would mean Cole and Helen are also going to write their own tell all book... and possibly in future seasons, Whitney, the red head dude that is always lurking around, and probably even a posthumous book by Scotty. Actually the red head and drunk daughter end up getting their own segments in the future because they are becoming my favorite parts of the show because the four main characters are becoming increasingly dreadful.

Supergirl: Have we always known Dean Cain was dead? I kept wondering why he was not at Thanksgiving and then I finally learn at the end he was killed in a plane accident, possibly at the hands of Supergirl's other boss. And looking at Ally McBeal's new face may be rough but she definitely gets all the best lines: "You have the wit of a YouTube comment."
You can download Supergirl on iTunes.

Blindspot: I am wrong for actually kind of like Rich Dot Com? But anyway. I (apparently) was half right on Chrissy Seaver's boyfriend. So he has not turned out to be not be a bad guy but it looks like he will turn out to be the not so socking death last week promised (though it is kind of unclear if he is actually dead, the boss gave a head shack but was it a "it does not look good shake" or a "he is not going to make it" shake? Since the next promo did not promise a death I am guessing that was it.
You can download Blindspot on iTunes..

Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: For me this season has been all about Simmons other planet and we finally got big reveal after big reveal about the place. So back in the earliest days of Hydra, which apparently pre-dates Red Skull by centuries, if not millenniums, there was the first Inhuman and they (for reason I did not quite understand) shipped it off to this other planet and would occasionally send sacrifices to the planet until they could build an Inhuman army for it to command. Okay, that is kind of awesome. Now evil Hydra guy want to bring the first Inhuman back and has to figure out how SHIELD was able to get Simmons back. This should be interesting to see if the evil Hydra guy is able to succeed in this plan or not or will SHIELD be able to stop them. Or maybe SHIELD will unwillingly bring that Inhuman back when they rescue Simmons astronaut friend.
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Survivor: Second Chance: In a season of so many twists I have lost count we got two more this week. First off the lame one, again the show hid a clue to the Hidden Immunity Idol instead of the actual Idol. But instead of hiding it at the Immunity Challenge, which was a cool chance, it was just some silly rules based scavenger hunt where Jeremy could only retrieve it at night when everyone was asleep. But the other twist was much more interesting, if you quit the Immunity Challenge you could receive an advantage in the game. I am actually surprised only two people jumped down, in the torrential downpour, I think I would take my chance with reaching the buoy first unless I was part of the Witches Coven who were on the chopping block. The advantage is a twist on last season's extra vote twist but instead of getting an extra parchment to write down another name, you get to steal someone else's vote. That is evil, I love it.

Then finally someone broke from the massive nine person alliance, I never understood why no one seemed to want to work with Abi Maria, Ciera, or Kass because those seem like lay-ups in the finals. Of course the vote came down to Kelley W. and Kelly W. (which was what Spencer actually wrote on his parchment). It looks like there may be another twist next week as the promo shows everyone drawing rocks. It is during the day so it is probably is not a tied Tribal Council (plus if you are Stephan, you make sure you break a tie with your advantage). Last season everyone who tried to bid their entire wad on an advantage at the food auction drew rocks. Could it be for the first time every everyone is smart enough to not buy food at the auction? Still I think if it came down to it I bet Abi Maria and Keith at least would still be stupid enough to buy food instead of waiting for the advantage.
You can download Survivor: Second Chance on iTunes.

Nashville: More hair drama! Though to be honest I would not have even notice if Maddie died her hair had someone not mentioned it. So it is, what, a shade or two lighter? Does not seem like much of a deal for a sixteen year old.
You can download Nashville on iTunes.

The Blacklist: For a "Fall Finale" that was a pretty week Blacklister of the week crew. They may have been the lamest Blacklisters in the history of the show (which is probably why they were not originally on the list). And Ressler's Boy Scout routine was a little much considering he was the one who let Lizzy escapee in the first place. But we got the reveal that the Senator is part of the Cabal though I am not sure how we got there, what was with the thing in Africa, I missed the significance there. Oh well. It looks like the midseason premiere has Lizzy stuck in Reddington's cage where I guess we will have a repeat of the episode where Red got stuck in the box with a shot Ressler this time with Lizzie in the box and the Cabal trying to get in.
The Blacklist on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 11/15/15

Once Upon a Time: If I am not mistaken, this is the first time they ever brought religion into the show. Though I think that maybe the Holy Grail on the show may not be the one Jesus reportedly drank from during The Last Supper. Of course the biggest giveaway was that this Holy Grail is too fancy, as Indiana Jones knows, Jesus would have drank from a more simplistic cup.
You can download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

The Librarians: I wonder if the elder Stone realized when he called his son a "song of a (expletive deleted) he was actually defaming his wife.
You can download The Librarians on iTunes.

Homeland: So the guardian Angel that saved Quinn just so happens to be buddies with a jihadist that was released from prison because of the leaked documents. Alrighty. And since Quinn killed him, is he now a leader of the jihadists? But my favorite part of the episode was Dar and Saul going at each other. I love it when people on this show call each other out for doing a horrible job because most of them are. And now that Saul is on to the Russians, how long until he learns his bed buddy is also in beds with them? Hopefully sooner than later.

The Walking Dead: After all the speculation on the fate of Glen (I fell in the the guts the zombies were eating were that of the other guy and he slid under the trash bin and waited the zombies out) the actor's name out of the credits. So either he really is dead or this is the biggest bit of trolling from a television show since Joss Wheadon wanted to put someone he killed of in the Pilot in the credits. I guess I am going to move Gen from the probably alive column to he is Schrodinger's Cat.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

The Affair: As they flashed the "Part 2" on screen I actually groaned thinking I had no desire to see some kid agonize in pain for another segment, but thankfully they flashed ahead a week. I believe this is the first time the second part actually happened after the first part and not at least partially concurrently. And I am horrible with names, but is the guy who is willing to sell the lawyer information about Scotty, is that the same guy who was working at the Lockheart Diner last week and worked as a mechanic back in season one?

Supergirl: I get Kara's explanation on why she does not to ever ask her cousin for help, but when she still ends up being saved by a blurry Superman, who of course makes it back to Metropolis before the show gets back from commercial, that really makes her look bad. But what actually should she expect, Jimmy Olsen's smart watch aside, does she not think he would see the news of one of his rouges kidnapping a business mogul in another ton? He does work at a newspaper.
You can download Supergirl on iTunes.

Gotham: Oh thank goodness, I thought we were going to have a Beth Greene situation on The Walking Dead where they kill off a formally useless character right after they actually made her interesting. I spend most of that last commercial break thinking, that was a very big fall... but... there was a tree there that could break her fall. Of course now she is back in jail. And so is Galavan. So what exactly is his master plan. He said that it was too soon to kill Jim Gordon so he knew Barbara would not be able to kill him and I am guessing he intentionally had her tell Jim about the former mayor's whereabouts. So why exactly incriminate yourself? Still his sister will probably be breaking everyone out again sooner than later.
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

The Voice: What the frack America? I was resigned since the Battle Round that Braiden would be this season's Ryan Sill, but I just assumed that it would be Gwen who would have to Save him, not America. Who are these morons who actually thought Braiden was better than Ellie Lawrence? Did someone resurrect Vote for the Worst and not tell me? And yeah, that Coach's Comeback was a massive fail. Of course Adam did not bring back Andi & Alex instead saved some foddery dude no one asked for and then had him sing a song perfect for duos. Adam is such a troll. Blake brought someone just to give them an embarrassing song. Since his team was weak, I though Pharrell had the best chance of one of these contestants advance but he ended up bring back someone who has not performed in a month.

The show quietly got rid of phone voting this season, I wrote it off as Sprint did not want to front the phone bill and the producers were to cheap to pay it themselves. I did not think it would have much effect on the outcome. Yet somehow even more white dudes advanced than usual. Seriously seventy-percent of the people America saved were Caucasian men. How do you end up with a cast less diverse than a Republican debate? Maybe almost as shocking as Braiden getting voted in over Ellie was Emily Ann getting the top ten iTunes bonus and yet was leaped over by not one but two white dudes for the Public Save. Really not a good week for iTunes predictions, Ellie had a twenty spot advantage, Shelby over took Amy's thirty-seven spot lead, and to a lesser extent, there was Celeste Bennon just five spots above Evan.

C'mon America, enough with the boring white dudes. The show does not need two country dudes (not to mention a third country singer voted through, oh no, we might have a season four repeat with four country singers in the top six), two blue eyed soul singers, and two wanna be alt-rockers who are too boring to be alternative to anything. I guess Madi should be thankful that there was only one white dude on her team. If it does not turn into season four, it will likely turn into season seven where the five girls in the Top 12 were the first five out with no females in the top five.

The Voice should be concerned with this because the long string of white guys with guitars phenomenon was one of American Idol's downfall. The Voice is currently on three straight white dudes and with only two females getting through by America's Vote a fourth is pretty much a lock. The fix is pretty easy, right now you can vote ten times for as many artists as you like. The Voice needs to change that to you get ten votes total per method spread out how every you like. So country fans for example cannot just vote for the four country singers ten times each anymore, instead they would have to decide, do I want to give all ten votes to Barrett or do I want to spread two or three votes among all four of the country singers. Here is my very spiteful Top 12 Power Ranking:

1. Madi Davis
2. Amy Vachal
3. Emily Ann Roberts
4. Korin Bukowski
5. Shelby Brown
6. Mark Hood
7. Jeffery Austin
8. Zach Seabaugh
9. Jordan Smith
10. Barrett Baber
11. Evan McKeel

48. Braiden Sunshine

Blindspot: So Chrissy Seaver's ex-boyfriends is still texting, so maybe is on the take from the CIA guy. But the big news from the episode was we are one episode until the mid-season final!!!!!!!! (I am really getting annoyed by all the midseason finale promos.) And someone will not survive!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So we saw Chrissy Seaver, Jane's childhood friend, and the Latina (I should really try and learn their names soon especially since it has already been renewed for a second season) walk into what looked like a hospital room. Obviously you can cross Lady Siff off the list, there is no show without her. So to quote another NBC star, always bet on black. So is it the head lady chick or the other black dude who has been fairly useless so far. So the latter seems to be the front runner. That is unless the cop out and kill one of the secondary character. Granted there are not many of those, there is the CIA guy (probably not because he is the big bad, it would be silly to get rid of the antagonist already), FBI dude's father or sister (we still do not know much of them, but I am officially guessing option four, Chrissy Seaver's boyfriend. Chrissy learns he is evil and in a bit of conscious, he sacrifices his life to save Chrissy or Lady Siff.
You can download Blindspot on iTunes..

Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: I am officially tired of the Lash storyline, hopefully it is now on ice since he is too. The ACU is reaching that point too, but at least we got a twist this week and we learned the head is working with a head of Hydra.
The question is does she know or does she think she is actually working for the government. But what I am still most interested this season is Simmons alien planet. And is there a more Millennials thing to do than to take selfies while stranded along on an alien planet?
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Survivor: Second Chances: It seems like a couple times every season I complain of alliances splitting votes for no reason. Usually one their members has the Idol, which they do not want to tell anyone, but splitting votes can easily lead to someone voting for the wrong person, be it intentional or on accident, and someone in your alliance. With that said, how do you have a nine to three numbers advantage and not split the votes. Someone could mess up and you would have still had the votes to get out either Kelley or Ciera. You could have been so paranoid for them to pull a Parvati and break out two Immunity Idols and still had enough to put three votes on Kelley, Ciera, and Abi Maria and get one of them out. Thankfully that did not happen because we would have been deprives of one of the greatest kiss offs in the history of the show when Abi Maria told the departing Savage, "At least you made the jury."
You can download Survivor: Second Chance on iTunes.

Nashville: So Scarlett cut her hair. I cannot remember anything else that happened this episode. Jeff died right? But seriously, that hair...
You can download Nashville on iTunes.

The Blacklist: As soon as Red realized the shaving dude was not the bad guy of the week I knew it was Samar's not so dead brother. And what does Samar do when she realizes her brother is alive? Makes out with a dude. And when she learns her brother is a terrorist? Makes out with another dude. I wished all hot chick dealt with drama in that way.
The Blacklist on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 10/31/15

Homeland: During the excitement of the return of Crazy Carrie last week I missed that Quinn was sent there to kill Carrie. Of course he did not. Thankfully we learned by the end of the episode who it was because really, there were only two plausible people in my mind, Dar and the German Bureau chief. Now the question was she also involved in the plane explosion too.

The Walking Dead: So Glen died. Or did he? I have a long standing belief to never believe someone is dead until we see a body. Well we definitely see zombies tear at Glen's flesh. But then there is the addendum to that belief that even if you see the body, I am still skeptical. The skeptical part of me noticed that the dude who killed himself was falling on top of Glen so it is very plausible that the entrails being pulled out were that of the other guy so I would not be that shocked if Glen shows up later in the season saying he slid under the trash bin while the zombies ate the other dude and just waited there to leave. Then I switched over from Quantico during the commercial to Talking Dead, which lack the obligatory actor shows up after he dies which is always kind of painful, as the producers saying in the most vague way possible that we will see Glen again in some capacity and the character was not included in the In Memorium package either. But the bigger question is why was Glen even in that position? How did Morgan make it back to Alexandria but Glen's group could not? And in the alley way, why did they not climb over the fence bordering the woods? But the second rule of this show is if the characters did the smart thing every time, there would be no show.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

The Affair: It seemed like an open and shut case Helen would get full custody of the kids, hey, they were not even around in the future act of the season finale last year with Noah and Allison in their swanky high rise. But how does Helen possibly get any visitation right, let along full custody, after a DUI with the kids in the car and weed in her purse? Grandma may be getting the kids because neither parent seems fit. Or maybe they will get shipped off to their aunt's place. Maybe there is a reason we have yet seen one of the Solloway children in the future yet.

Quantico: This week's Power Ranking of Most Absurd Moments of the Week: 1) The front page picture of Alex which looked like it was taken from a Maxim photo shoot, 2) The live stream instant;u getting twelve million viewers, 3) Taylor Swift (did they already run of hot blondes to call her already or did I just miss it this week) abandoning her mission to have sex with her antagonist.
You can download Quantico on iTunes.

Supergirl: Oh my, is it too soon to call this the guiltiest guilty pleasure in the history of television?
You can download Supergirl on iTunes.

Gotham: It was an obvious joke, but I am still glad Barbra suggested Butch put a chainsaw on his stump of a hand (and the same week Ash vs. the Evil Dead premieres to boot). Just as obvious was Kristen Kingle would die which would push Ed closer to being The Riddler, the only question was when and by who's hand. We finally got our answer this week as Ed stupidly admitted to killing her last boyfriend and then suffocated while promising to never hurt her again. Not how long until his wardrobe turns green?
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

Switched at Birth: So if Emmett was home for the summer and the final scene takes place ten months later, that makes it March / April right? So why are Daphne and Bay are still in China? Are they staying there because I am guessing Bay does not obtain gainful employment for a vacation. And what was the phone call? Ug, I hate cliffhangers like this.
You can download Switched At Birth on iTunes.

The Voice: What the frack?!? This show is just trolling me at this point. Andi & Alex were number one on my Battle Ranking Power Rankings, go first and get booted by Adam in favor of some mediocre rocker who has little chance of making it to the top twelve (unless Adam is stupid enough to save him so it is not entirely out of the question). Next up is Ellie Lawrence, who topped my Blind Audition Power Ranking, who goes out to Braiden Sunshine, who has sat in the bottom both times. Making things worse I joked in that post that Braiden would end up being this season's Ryan Sill (never forget), beating Gwen's lone four chair singer in the Battle Round, then probably beat Ellie in the Knockout Round, before Gwen inexplicably saved him in the Playoffs. That was a joke Gwen, you were not supposed to actually do this. Sure picking Demi Lovato was kind of disaster (has anyone ever advanced on this show singing one of her songs) but still I would take Ellie at her worst than Braiden at his worst. I really hate this show. Is it really hard to get the twenty best singers to the Live Show? It seem like five of the twelve that advanced this week just scream fodder and whose only chance to advance is if their coaches save them. I would have said six but sadly Viktor will probably advance by the public because the bored housewife voting block will be voting for his face over his voice.

Blindspot: I would say it is kind of random to have the other chick from Young and Hungry show up on your serious drama but I guess the first time I noticed her was when she was recurring during the first season of The Americans. Since she has that other gig, it is a shame she cannot stick around because it got really sad watching Jane try to connect with anyone and getting shut down every time. Plus that nerd fight scene with the tech person on the team was fun too. Oh well.
You can download Blindspot on iTunes..

Marvel's Agent's of S.H.I.E.L.D.: We finally get the what happened to Simmons episode and sadly no talking ducks were involved. I actually enjoyed the first segment but as soon as the astronaut showed up I got less and less involved. Then the ending was just silly, seriously, hold each other's hands so you do not get separated. And though we know know what went on, we are left with more questions, like what is "death." Then you have the promo saying May's husband died last week. Alrighty, there goes my theory that he survived.
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Wicked City: I do not really need another serial killer show in my life, but hey, it is the chick from Swimf@n and it is not like there is anything else on at the time. But how exactly how long will the show last if the detective was able to figure out who it is in the first episode. Take the reporter to the artist and then post the picture around town.
You can download Wicked City on iTunes.

Survivor: Second Chances: What a great decision to switch tribes up as many times this season, it is much better than having silly gimmicks like Redemption Island (and the promos says there are merging early next week too). You have one tribe with only one original member of the other tribe but she was the one with an Immunity Idol. Then there was Stephan's weird tearful rant about not wanting an Alpha Male beating him again. But of course it was Abi Maria's tribe that went to Tribal Council. And what weird bedfellows that ousted Woooooooooooo. Aside from Abi Maria, you had Chaos Kass, her nemesis Spencer, and a paranoid Ciera who did appreciate Savage putting her name in his mouth. Seriously, has there ever been a weirder alliance than those four? It will be interesting to see how things shake up after the merge. Will that five strong alliance actually stick together (since not one alliance has stayed strong I am guessing no), and if so, they still need two more for a majority. But now that we are at the merge, you have to go ahead and pencil in Abi Maria into the finals because who would not want to sit next to her. Imagine what fireworks a Abi Maria vs. Kass would produce. But thankfully Terry's son turned out to be alright. You never want to see someone go home like that. It is a bit surprising that it does not happen more often. I believe it was only the second time in thirty season.
You can download Survivor: Second Chance on iTunes.

Nashville: When drunk young Wheeler walked out on the terrace, I thought, oh no, he is the one going over the edge, not Juliette. Instead Jeff awkwardly fell over while trying to save her. Poor Juliette, the one guy who could spin this into her favor just splattered on the sidewalk. And poor Layla, her husband turned out to be gay, she gets dropped from one label and put on the back burner of another, and now her boyfriend dies of what will be ruled as an apparent suicide depending on what dunked young Wheeler says.
You can download Nashville on iTunes.

The Blacklist: There is nothing I hate on television more than the x amount of time earlier place card. Am I really supposed to believe they killed off Lizzy? Never crossed my mind even when they were significantly outnumbered in the Mexican standoff. But I did like that the person who put the hit on her was a teenage girl not like the CIA guy who seemed too obvious or the Congresswoman who was another suspect of mine.
The Blacklist on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 10/25/15

Once Upon a Time: So King Arthur us evil, and Lancelot is (presumable) going to break the curse with his love true kiss with Gwenavere? Huh? And what happened to the Brave chick. I thought she went to Camelot with everyone else and she was thrown in jail with no one else noticing?
You can download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: Crazy Carrie is back! Is this the first time since season two since we have seen Carrie off her meds (not including when she got drugged last season)? I am pretty sure I saw Dar on her crazy picture wall too so my CIA is at least crazy enough for Crazy Carrie. Then there was the scene with the Berlin chief talking to someone from her bathroom. Obviously who she was talking to was going to be a twist. At first I thought she was going to be a lesbian, but that would be too cliched of a twist. Then I thought she was hooking up with the Foundation head. But no, she has been hooking up with Saul. Alrighty. That certainly makes their bickering over the past couple episodes more pointed and Saul's about face of sending her home make more sense. But now the big question is just what is Quinn going to do with Carrie now that he has her?

The Walking Dead: Too many initials this week. At least we learned the W were Wolves. But what does JSS mean? And what was with the A on Carol's porch?
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

The Affair: After the show flipped up its formats this season, I kind of held out hope that this season would continue to be random instead of following some combination of Noah / Helen / Alison / Cole like I pretty much assumed after the first two episodes. For instance, during the first segment this week I was hoping the second segment episode would follow drunk daughter. Alas instead we just got Allison tagging along as her boss went to kill his dog (but thankfully just scared him off). Le sigh. Maybe drunk daughter will be the format change in season three. Considering he is the one that dies, you would think Scotty and his teen girlfriend would get to tell their stories at some point.

Gotham: Yeah, this show is much more entertaining when crazy Barbra around.
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

The Voice: I complain a lot about how bad the coaches are at picking songs when the Battle Rounds start and all my complains can be summed up in the Higher Ground battle. Seriously Pharrell, why are assigning a funk classic to two of the WASPiest WASPs this season? The Red Hot Chili Peppers are the only white people who have earned the right to sing that song. That performance reminded me of the time I was working at the local amphitheater where I had to sit through 98° giving the happiest performance ever of Superstition while I stood there head in hands wondering how this was happening.

But surprisingly there was one coach who actually made some inspired song choices and Cee-Lo is still on his sabbatical (okay, Adam did have one inspired song randomly pulling The Calling out of his musical quiver). Sure Gwen is a horrible coach with a bad team, so bad half of her Battle got montaged. but kudos for finally having the guts to get Regina Spektor cleared. This show loves the quirky girl but surprisingly nobody had ever done a song by the patron saint of quirky girls up to this point I was beginning to think that either the producers thought Regina was too obscure (though I would think she is more well known than Ingrid Michaelson who's song was featured a couple seasons back) or she would not clear her songs for singing show. Hopefully now that the president has been set Regina's whole catalog can be raided.

And it was not just Regina Specktor who Gwen introduced to The Voice audience for the first time. Yeah The Calling was random, but that was last decade, Gwen went back two more decades to resurrect Howard Jones. And though they got the dreaded montage placement, Gwen also assigned The Wreckers and Talk Talk (sure that song was eventually made famous by No Doubt). I am usually the pro-montage guy but most of the montaged Battles looked much more interesting than most that actually got shown, aside from those two new songs that have never been performed on the show before, there were the two coffee-house singers on Team Pharrell doing Riptide, heck, I would have even rather seen the weird Blake assigned co-ed duet of Baby One More Time; sure it probably was a trainwreck, but a trainwreck would have been much more entertaining than yet another boring overdone Motown song done by people whose parents may have not even been born yet when the songs were released.

Blindspot: Nothing better than a good old Mexican standoff between government agencies. But it seems now that Jane used to be one of the CIA's assetts and evil CIA guy wants her back or at least eliminate Jane before she remembers anything.
You can download Blindspot on iTunes..

Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: I spend all season wondering what was going on with Simmons but for the first couple episodes her story has been relegated to that pre-credit scene at the end of the episode. And just when she was about to explain what happened to her in the galaxy far, far away, they cut to black. Boooo. At the promo monkey makes it seem the next episode is going to be a flashback. Hopefully it is the whole episode and does not inner-spliced with the Inhumans saga. I guess I should guess who Lash's other version is; um, if it is someone we know, that does not seem like a long list. Baron's son is probably at the top of the list. Of course my number one rule of television is if you do not see the body, they are not dead (and even then I am a bit skeptical) I do not believe Blair Underwood is dead, maybe that was Baron's son running from Blair. But I am going with Coulson's new love interest who also has been hunting down Inhumans and for some reason was not riding in the van. Speaking of inconsistencies in storytelling, if Lash wants to kill all Inhumans, why did he not go after Daisy while she was incapacitated?
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Survivor: Second Chances: After the first or second episode I said Varner was overplaying himself out of the game and a couple episodes later he is gone. You can also say Monica got voted out this week for playing to hard, except she made the right play. Take out the potential women's alliance (seriously Kimmi, why are you irate at this, you are a female, she is saying she is not voting you out), going after Spencer was the right choice. I would trust Kelly way more than I would trust him. So for the third straight time after the tribe swap, the former tribe with the most members voted one of their own out. The final five that was made this week may end up being just that because the other two tribes are overplaying themselves out of this game. But hey, this week was the very first time Abi Maria did not go to Tribal Council. Who would have thunk it? Good for her.
You can download Survivor: Second Chance on iTunes.

The Blacklist: Finally a "previously on" package, unfortunately they did not remind me who Pee-Wee Herman was. So now I am even more confused as to why he shot Red's henchman. So was he a plant by the kidnappers, or did he turn on him for other reasons?
The Blacklist on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 10/18/15

Once Upon a Time: Why is Snow White so quick to believe Sir Lancelot, this is clearly a different dude (wait, was that the same guy poising as an usher at the beginning of the season who told Emma not to pull the sword from the stone)? But anyway. I am beginning to think King Arthur is not who he says he is, maybe he is Merlin in disguises and the real King Arthur is in the tree. But what is bugging me is that all the new characters that come to Storybrooke never change their clothes anymore. Can't they get the Camelotians a change of clothes?
You can download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: My favorite part of the early season was when the leaker was talking about how the German spies were probably searching her apartment right now and she did not mind as long as they did not let her cat out, cut to the German spy deadpanning, "Did you see a cat?" Awesome. I also found it interesting that the one guy accused Carrie of being a Trojan Horse for Saul in the evil foundation. That would totally be something they would do (and kind of did in season three when he sold her out to the Senate). But their interaction during their first interaction was too raw and there was no one around for it to be for show (but then again Carrie looked stunned when Saul sold her out to the Senate and no one was around then either). Another great scene was when the German Bureau Chief called out Saul for doing anything for Carrie whenever she messed up but quickly sold her out after one mistake. It is about time someone did that. But the big question is who want Carrie dead? Is the CIA too obvious?

The Walking Dead: Last week I called the plan from the season finale of Fear the Walking Dead the dumbest idea in the history of dumb ideas, but the main show came close. Would it have not been wiser to just set the whole lot on fire instead of Pied Pipering them to... where exactly were they leading all the zombies? Of course, as I have said many times before, if these characters were smart it would be a very boring show.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Quantico: Wait, the gay dude (who is probably not even gay) is in cahoots with Jacob from Lost? Huh, that makes little to no sense and just a shock for shock sake. If your secret agent knows where the suspect is, who not send in the SWAT team? Which probably means Jacob is in on the whole conspiracy. And why is she still on the run anyway, doesn't the fingerprint thing just exonerate her?
You can download Quantico on iTunes.

Gotham: Wait, did I just see a grown man punch a teenage girl on national television? That is messed up.
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

The Voice: I really do not like the Battle Round, they just seem to drag on since they went from four Battles per hour to three after the first season. I figured I would just watch the episode On Demand later and watched other programming live (I still watched the second hour Monday live thanks to the lack of anything else on at the time). Except when I went to watch On Demand, I just went, nope, cannot watch this crap anymore after the boring hour I already sat through. So I just watched the YouTube versions, so overextended training clips and stop watching when the coaches start talking in hyperbole about how great the performances are just to sit on their hands when Carson tells them the losing singer is available for a Steal. Plus the two bald jokes I already heard got old real quick.

Even condensing those two hours into less than twenty minutes on YouTube (seriously, there were 180 minutes of the show airing this week and only something less than a half an hour are devoted to people actually performing) this week was quite dreadful. The only thing more shocking then Blake picking Zach (I agree with Blake more than any other coach, but I disagreed with each of his decisions) was that Battle was not montaged. Seriously, just how bad were those montaged Battles that they were possibly worse than that Battle. I have a hard time believing it was worse than Madi vs. Sydney, two of my five favorite Blind Auditions this season. Then you had Ivonne vs. Siahna Im which definitely would have been montaged had Gwen and Blake inexplicably pushed their Steal buttons. That was not even the most head scratching Steal Gwen tried this week as giving Regina Love a second chance was mostly unnecessary, not that any of the other loser were really worthy of one either. Can we please just montage the rest of the Battle Round and go straight to the Knockout Round next week please?

Blindspot: I tune into this show mostly to see Lady Sif beating dudes up but maybe one of the few things more entertaining than that is seeing two dudes in HAZMAT suits trying to beat each other up. My favorite part was hen FBI guy reached for his gun and realized, oh wait, I am wearing a HAZMAT suit. But the more serial aspects of the show got really confusing. Seriously, carbon dating teeth can tell you where someone was born? What? If true, does it make the most sense that Lady Sif's teeth were replaced? And while I am predicting things, Chrissy Seaver's boyfriend has to be evil, right? The boring significant other on conspiracy shows are always evil.
You can download Blindspot on iTunes..

Castle: I saw it coming a mile away because I thought early on that the blind priest was going to be involved, but still, the sight of a "blind" priest runnung away was still hilarious.
You can download Castle.

Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: My favorite part of the episode was when the went subtitles for the Cockneys. But I had to wonder when Fitz showed up right after that scene why they do not subtitle him too but he is unintelligible at times. I was very disappointed that Simmons did not even bring back a parasite or anything and thought we were going to go through a season of watching her get back to normal like Fitz last season, but thankfully the end credits scene she had a Jack from Lost moment saying we have to go back. It would have been a total waste of a cliffhanger if we never say that planet, or any of it inhabitants again. But why exactly does she want to go back? Is the English guy from the opening of last episode still there? Did she befriend an anthropomorphic duck?
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Survivor: Second Chances: How disappointing that Abi Maria did not flip alliances for the forth straight episode. I was actually begining to think this may actually be the episode that the tide turned against Abi Maria, but shockingly her name did not come of across anyone's lips (well aside from when Abi Maria reminded Woooooooooooooo not to write her name; classic Abi Maria). Almost as surprising was that everyone played the short game and booted Jeff because Wooooooooooo is better at challenges. I get booting Jeff because he is slippery, but how do you even know you would have another swap before your next challenge? Probst could swap tribes every two weeks until the merge. But before that, that was a boring Reward Challenge. If you are going to only have one person per tribe participate, at least let the other tribes pick who does it. It would have been much more entertaining had it been Abi Maria vs. Cierra, vs. Kimmi bumbling their way threw a challenge instead of three alpha males.
You can download Survivor: Second Chance on iTunes.

Nashville: I like how the alt-rock dude just called out everybody's dirty laundry. Though I was surprised when he met Layla he did not say, oh yeah, you are the reality star with the gay husband, right? Hopefully he sticks around long enough to cover Juliet's latest album in its entirety in the vein of Joy Division.
You can download Nashville on iTunes.

The Blacklist: Again, the show seriously needs a "previously on" package. I remember Pee Wee Herman was on the last season, but I barely remember who he was on the show.
The Blacklist on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 10/11/15

Fear the Walking Dead: Well that had to be the dumbest idea in the history of bad ideas to let out an arena full of zombie and lead them into the building you are trying to sneak in to. Certainly there had to be a better plan out there than that. And that ocean looked pretty blood red which is ominous for the next season.
You can download Fear the Walking Dead on iTunes.

The StrainWith everyone converging on the Luman I predicted someone would die. I was right and wrong, no one going after the book perished but the show befuddingly killed off the two hot chicks. Hurph.
You can download The Strain on iTunes.

Quantico:Of course the dude did not die in the future, but I guess it is better than waiting until the middle of the season to reveal that like the first season of Revenge. Then my favorite twist from the premiere the twin Arabs got a little less interesting after learning they were brought in by the Assistant Director. And it is too obvious of a prediction that the gay dude is not really gay and just wants to be the first openly gay recruit? I would not be at all surprised if he does not hook up with one of the Arab Twins before Christmas.
You can download Quantico on iTunes.

Gotham: Barbra and Tigress, oh my. I know we the audience know he is evil, but c'mon, did no one notice how bad Galavan and Jerome were interacting in their interaction? At least they killed the latter because he was really becoming the annoying. But Alfred flirting with Dr. Tomkins really made this episode.
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

The Voice: Only one episode this week but the final Auditions did bring a couple of great song choices before the coaches take over and pick the same tired songs (Ain't No Mountain High Enough and yet another Sam Smith song were featured in the promo, le sigh). The last gasp song first ever songs from the catalogs of Tom Waits, Gary Clark Jr., Wonderwall (darn you montage) and whoever you want to credit Dream a Little Dream to, Mama Cass probably being the most famous. But we hay have had our worst Blind Audition of the season when someone had the audacity to try to cover The Scientist. Um, no, Holly Henry owns that cover; it should be retired to The Voice Hall of Fame (to a lesser extent Shelby Brown was alright, but she is no Amanda Brown).

Blindspot: Well that was shocking. I expected bearded dude to be an integral part of the show and they just killed him off. But who exactly was he telling Lady Siff not to trust? I thought he was talking about the FBI but was he not the one who sent her to them? We do know he wiped her memory, but maybe he did not put the tattoos on her. Mmmm, this show is slowly getting interesting. At least we got confirmation that Lady Siff is the FBI dude's childhood friend (which ironically made me a little suspicious that maybe she is not for the first time; though I still think his father was/is involved) so they are not drawing out that storyline.
You can download Blindspot on iTunes..

Castle: I guess I read the Kate leaving situation wrong, she was not leaving town to catch the bad guys, just leaving Castle to keep him safe. Alrightly. But it turns out I am kind of right with Alexis turning into Veronica Mars. Not only did she go blonde but investigated a Stanford Prison Experiment, something Ronnie did in season three. And if Halloween lasts all month like Kate suggests, does that mean we get three more weeks of Angel Alexis? I would not have any problems with that.
You can download Castle.

Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Well that was disappointing. I was hoping that we would get more of Gemma on the other planet, maybe running into otherworldly characters in the Marvel universe. Instead we got maybe two minutes on the other planet. We did not even get to see what was chasing her last week. Meh. Maybe she brought back a parasite or two.
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Survivor:Second Chances: For those keeping track at home, there have been three episodes and Abi Maria has switched alliances three times. Awesome. Seriously, how do you have a four to two advantage in the numbers and then have three of them being the only three discussed in going home. You would think having all returning players would cut down on the stupid mistakes but this has been the most wild season after three episodes maybe ever. On paper taking Abi Maria to the finals is a sound strategy because no one would vote for her but everyone she is aligned with keep on getting voted out the very next episode. I cannot wait to see who she turns on next week.
You can download Survivor: Second Chance on iTunes.

Modern Family: Boooooooo. I was hoping Dylan was going to move in permanently.
You can download Modern Family on iTunes.

The Blacklist: So Ressler would not stop the Russian limo because it was tantamount to invading Russian soil to arrest Lizzie, but he had no problem possibly starting World War III to save her life. I love the logic on the show.
The Blacklist on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 10/4/15

Once Upon a Time: Seriously, who brings a baby into a twister bound restaurant to another land? But anyway. I kind of liked the ending even though it probably means for the first part of the season we will probably get split story lines from present day and six months ago.

Ray Donovan: So the pop Armenian singer did not work? Maybe I should have guessed that you should not trust Armenian gangsters to keep their word. I was a bit surprised that the FBI guy did not come back at all, Ray did shoot and left him by the side of the road. Maybe next season. Instead we had to spend too much time with Bridget and her teacher who, yes, crossed the proverbial line, but did not do so with two feet. But they did go back to the priest whose storyline was dropped halfway through the season, but no Arayians who were dropped around the same time. But I am guessing Ray going back to the Lord will not last by the time season four comes around.

Fear the Walking Dead: Wait, are the two step siblings going to hook up. That is kind of ew. And why trash the house, just live there? It is much nicer than the one you are living in and the owners are not coming back. And why do I care more about some silly throwaway scene more than the revelation that they are going to "humanely" kill off the civilian population.

Masters of Sex: Oh wow, Bill gave up on Virginia. So does that mean the Little Brown Man (when Betty first said this I was like "oh my" as I did not know that Little Brown was a publishing house) goes nuclear at the press party telling the press about Bill's legal trouble? It it plausible with how the show does time jumps that Bill could spend some time in prison (like the last two summers I am going to stay away from the spoiler zone that is his Wikipedia page). Then there are the questions of the state of his marriage, whether Virginia marries the scent king, and Bill's legal troubles. It actually may be harder not to look at spoilers this time around.

The Strain: I would not all be disappointed if the show devolved into the Gus and Angel show. It would be better than bring back the rat that sits on Eph's head. And it was a different wig to. I wonder if Corey Stoll burned the anime looking original wig and when it came time for the flashback the costume department just had to grab a random one off the rack. I joked earlier this season that they were not going to kill someone off right after including an opening credits sequence (which aired just that one time randomly) but someone has to die next week, right? With everyone descending on the Luman it is hard to think all the players get out alive. Sadly I think it may be the Nazi Vampire (who would have guessed three years ago I would be sad someone killed a Nazi vampire?).
You can download The Strain on iTunes.

Quantico: When I saw the previews I wrote that best case scenario it was going to be Homeland season four; worst case scenario: Homeland season three. After one episode it looks much more like season three. Actually it may be worse, it may be more like some crappy Shonda Rhimes show where absurdly attractive professionals have sex with each other in between twists upon twists even if those twists are extremely obvious or make little to no sense. Really the only twist I liked from the premiere (even though it fell into the makes no sense category) was the Muslim twins. I also do not like the storytelling devise of flashing back to the first days of Quantico mixed with a blown up building. Why not tell a linear story of the first days of the FBI and then blow up the building in the season or mid-season final? But I will continue to watch. And let me go ahead and predict the FBI trainer guy is the one setting up the hot Indian chick. Either him or "Taylor Swift" because it will either be the most obvious or one that makes little to no sense.
You can download Quantico on iTunes.

Gotham: So the big new from the show this week was that Jim Gordon and Leslie Thompkins are having a kid. Well not on the show but the actors are in real life. Alright. I wonder if that will be written into the show or she will be hiding behind medical tables soon or maybe she will be kidnapped in the second half of the season. As for the actual show, so a bunch of cheerleaders are about to be set on fire but no one thought to go out the fire door?
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

The Voice: The first couple seasons were mostly enjoyable, I made it through the whole season for the first and third seasons (I have to skip the disastrous second season finale). Since then I usually am out sometime around the time the show goes live. I usually fault this on the lack of good singers because in those first three seasons the openly recruited seasoned professionals but since has been more of American Idol type show with mostly armatures (seriously who are there some many teenagers with braces this season?). In the first three seasons there were about twelve different singers on the show who were already in my music library before they auditioned by since that number is one (and she was montaged off the show).

Then this week I was kind of bored again with the same old mediocre teenagers doing boring and bland karaoke versions of songs. And then they introduced another rocker nanny, which we have seen a few times on the show (remember the good old days when Alicia Keys backup singers were the cliche; have we run out of Alicia Keys back up singers?). But then rocker nanny mentioned she used to be in a band called Sleeper Agent. Wait, what? Not only were they in my music library, their song Get Burned was #22 on my list of The 100 Best Songs of 2012. Okay so her Blind Audition was not great, but if she makes it around to the Knockout Round maybe they will actually let her perform Get Burned.

Last week I mentioned how the Blind Auditions bring out some awesome song selections (before devolving into the same overused catalog in the Battle that get more tired the closer to the finale) and this we got first ever songs on the show from Cheap Trick, Mountain, Cameo, Andrew McMahon In the Wilderness, oh yeah, and someone auditioned with the Rollergirl theme song. That was definitely the most random song choice since someone sang The Jeffersons Theme Song.

Blindspot: Well that is and interesting plot that Lady Sif may be someone from the FBI's past (whom his father was accused of kidnapping and murdering). I do fear this may play out like The Blacklist where there was overwhelming evidence that Red is Lizzie's father only for Red to deny it for two seasons. I am guessing the DNA match will come up negative next week but still tease that that is what happen. The show would be much interesting if it turns out FBI guy's dad did actually kidnap Lady Sif and was the one who trained her.
You can download Blindspot on iTunes..

Castle: Wait, what just happened, is Kate leaving the show or are we getting two separate story lines every week, case of the week and Kate looking for the real killers? I mentioned last week offhandedly I would not mind if the show switched into a Veronica Mars, father daughter PI dynamic with Castle and Alexis but I did not actually think it might happen.
You can download Castle.

Marvel's Agents of S.I.E.L.D.: So over their summer vacation Fitz went from brain damaged to Indiana Jones. Alrighty. While I have spent all summer trying to figure out what happened to Gemma and a black hole portal that bends space and time never once crossed my mind. Hopefully the end of this storyline is not as bad as the ending to Intersteller. But anyway. I am not that familiar with Marvel comics so I am not entirely sure where she is and even though cinematic characters rarely show up, I will be slightly disappointed if we do not see one of the Guardians of the Galaxy. Hey, Bradly Cooper has shown willingness to show up on crappy televised versions of his movies. I would even be content with the cosmonaut dog or even Howard the Duck.I was interested in the clock counting down until the Inhumans reach one hundred percent but there are no Marvel movies coming out February 2017 (assuming my math is right) but the next movie after that is the second Guardians movie, not that Gemma will still be around by then (unless this is like the Intersteller water planet where hour equaled like five Earth years). Plus we are still four years away from an Inhumans movie. Speaking of which, the new big bad is effectively scary in a Buffy monster of the week kind of way.
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Survivor: Second Chances: After thirty season, Survivor has become a well oiled machine that I can recognize every beat that it hits. But that last segment was a weird one. When Varner teased before the break that Shirin and Spencer sealed their fate, I have been conditioned to think either 1) his plan will go horribly wrong or 2) the show will may think think someone is going to flip but ended up towing the line. So when Abi Maria actually told Shirin she was probably going home I though, uh oh, you never tell someone that, now those two will scramble to get someone out. So when they talked to Wooooooooooooo I thought we would get Wooooooooooo saying that maybe he should weigh his option, but no, he shut them down right then. So when they walked to Tribal Council I thought, okay, Abi is going to go full crazy Brazilian chick and get people to turn on them. But no. The dominate alliance did not even mess up splitting the vote. So not only is the show playing with the contestants this season (two twists in the premiere and the promos spoiling another big one next week) they are playing with the viewer's expectations too. And I kind of like it.
You can download Survivor: Second Chance on iTunes.

Nashville: I wonder why they did not kill Deacon's sister last week but I guess they just waited a week.
You can download Nashville on iTunes.

The Blacklist: This show really needed a previously on package. It is hard enough for me to remember last week let along what happen three or four months ago. But, oh my, blonde Lizzy.
The Blacklist on iTunes.

The Five Most (and Least) Anticipated Question for 2015-16 Television

Tomorrow is the official start of Fall television with all four networks premiering new seasons as well as three new shows including Blindspot which tops my most anticipated list. Of course with a new season comes new questions and these are the five I am most interested in:

1. What exactly is the saturation point for comic book shows? Three years ago Arrow was the lone live action funny book on network television (and that is only if you consider The CW a network). Marvel got into the game two years with Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Things exploded last year, both of those shows got a spin-off with The Flash and Agent Carter respectively along with Gotham, iZombie, and the only one that did not make it to a second season Constantine (but as a consolation prize the titular character is showing up on Arrow this season). That does not even include the five Marvel Shows that are planned to air on Netflix (Daredevil being the only one that has been released; Jessica Jones is getting released later this year). The networks have adding a couple more this season with yet another Arrow spinoff Legends of Tomorrow and not officially a spin-off but share the same showrunner so a crossover is possible Supergirl. Then on Fox they are adapting Lucifer coming mid-season.

On cable The Walking Dead has remained the lone comic adaptation despite being the biggest show on all television (okay technically that is a graphic novel if you want to split hairs). But that is about to change too and that is not even count The Walking Dead spin-off that is not based on a print version. AMC is developing a show based on the DC property Preacher (ironically starring two Marvel vets Dominic Cooper, the younger Howard Stark and Raina from SHIELD) while TNT is getting into the game with a live action Teen Titans. While over at Syfy they have two funny books in development including a Superman prequil set on Krypton (which will likely have nothing to do with the CBS show just to make things confusing). And in addition to the Netflix series, Playstation's first scripted show Powers was already renewed for a second season. So that is ten comic book adaptations this season on television, six on streaming sites with three coming soon to cable. Even if you only watch comic books adaptations, that is a lot of television to watch.

2. What happened to Gemma Simmons? Speaking of comic books, the biggest cliff hanger to come from one last season was what became of our favorite biochem scientist? A lot happened in the season finale of Agents of SHIELD, Coulson had his hand cut off, the Inhumans mist thing got turned into fish oil pills, Ward was recruiting his own supervillian team, The Avengers came in and saved the day (okay the last one did not, and will never happen), but I want to know is what happened to Gemma after getting sucked into Kree obelisk? I doubt she is gone from the show and snce the obelisk is supposed to destroy Inhumans I am guessing she come out with a new superpower and possibly a new desire to kill Skye Daisy. Of course being a Joss Whedon show, thoughts of Fred who had her body taken over by a God has also crossed my mind. Whatever it is, I am sure the scientist we knew and loved will be much different this season.

3. Will any new show be as good as Mr. Robot? The surprise hit of the summer was easily Mr. Robot who just owned the conversation on the internet. I certainly did not see it coming as I initally had no interest in another attempt at television for Christian Slater until I learned Dalia Royce was also part of the cast. Can anything premiering this fall garner as much attention? My guess is no. Blindspot will probably be the best new show by how long can a procedural that rips off Memento stay in the conversation. Maybe the best at reaching Mr. Robot type hype on network television could be Quantico which looks like it could at its best be Homeland season four. Granted worst case scenario the show devolves into Homeland season three.

4. How will Continuum end? Continuum was has been one of the quietly good shows on television for the past three years and the best time traveling show since Quantum Leap. Of course it got canceled but not before airing six final fourth season episodes (two of which already aired). Evil minions from a dark future timeline showed up in the season premiere and reeked havoc on Keira. Will she finally be able to back to her time? Is there a time for her to go back to now? It will be a fun ride to see if she does.

5. Will Ash vs. The Evil Dead be any good?: We have been inundated with Heroes Reborn promos for the last couple month leading to most people who watch the original wondering, why? The show was widely reviled with most people saying it went off the rails in the second season (I contend the first season pretty much sucked too aside from the one episode Bryan Fuller scripted). On the flip side there has been little press for a reboot that people have been hankering for decades. I remember seeing Army of Darkness in high school thinking it was the greatest thing ever (I eventually went back to watch the two horror Evil Dead movies but much preferred the campiness of the third movie). Pretty much ever since there have been talks of a fourth movie in the Evil Dead saga. The closest came about a decade ago when there was talks of an Ash vs. Freddy vs. Jason movie after the first two horror legends faced off (there have been a couple of comics and video games). There was also hope when the reboot of Evil Dead (which featured Bruce Campbell in a post credits teaser) was released two years ago with a sequel that would see the two franchises combining with both Campbell and Tessa Altman starring. Instead at Comic Con last year Sam Raimi announced there would be a television show to continue the original Evil Dead to air on Starz best known for... um, well, their aired Party Down foe two seasons a couple years ago. Will it be any good? Well it is written by the Raimi brothers (Sam is directing the first episode) and Bruce is staring. As of there there seems to be no ties to the reboot as there has been no announcement of Tessa Altman's involvement, instead Xena the Warrior Princess is in the cast. Since I do not have Starz I can hear what other people say about it and can temper my expectation whenever I get around to seeing it. But as of now I am hopeful. It certainly has to be better than the the Heroes reboot or the televised versions of Limitless or Minority Report which both look dreadful (though I am a bit hopeful the former is successful enough for someone to greenlight a televised Lucy show as that movie was significantly better than Limitless; Tyra Collett as Lucy).


As the great philosopher Butt-Head once pondered, “If it weren’t for things that sucked, how would we know if something was awesome,” so here are the five least anticipated questions of the new television season.

1. Who is going to win the worst reality show this season? No I am not talking about Dancing with the Has Beens and Never Weres or even the final season of American Karaoke but by far the worst reality show on television this season is the Republican Primaries. Four years ago we had the clown car of candidates where nut jobs like Herman Cain and Michelle Bachmann each got a week a top the polls before everyone realized just how crazy they were and just ended up nomination Mitt Romney, the human robot. Things were supposed to be different this time around after the Republican conducted an autopsy realizing they need to do a better job courting minorities and women after losing to Barack Obama again. Then Donald Trump got into the race by calling Mexican immigrants rapists and mad sexist statements about Megyn Kelly after she asked if he was sexist... and then went to the top of the Republican polls. He called war hero John McCain a loser for being captured... and rose higher. Most recently he insulted the lone woman in the race, Carly Fioarino's looks in a Rolling Stone interview... and still leads. NBC had and do the biggest troll in history by replacing him on The Celebrity Apprentice with an immigrant who fathered an anchor baby.

Or course this is not to say go ahead and pencil in a Democrat for 2016 because their nomination process is in as much chaos, it is just a lot less entertaining. Seriously, is there a more boring scandal than Hilary Clinton's e-mails? It makes Chris Christie's bridge problems look like a scene out of Wolf of Wall Street in comparison. Unfortunately the only other Democrat who decided to run (so far) is Bernie Sanders who just come across as your crazy Jewish uncle. He is just basically the socialist Ron Paul. How depressing we have to root for Joe Biden to get into the race as the best way to avoid a President Trump or Clinton Part Deux and as we learned from Bush, the sequel is always significantly worse than the original.

2. What happened to Becca in the Elevator at the End of Hindsight? After failing at her second chance in the nineties, actually making a bigger mess of it then she did the first time around, Becca rushed to the elevator that flashed her back to the last great decade, Numb starts playing again... and fade to black. Surprisingly VH1 renewed the lowly rated show thus making wonder where the show would go in the second season. Would it go back to present day? Go back even further? Flash forward to the 00's? Then out of nowhere, late last month VH1 sent out a press release saying "nevermind, Hindsight is canceled." What? If they wanted to cancel it outright after the first season, fine, whatever, but you cannot renew it and then renig later. Renewed shows have gotten shortened before and Southland got canned after getting renewed but that was instantly picked up by TNT, this is the first time I remember a renewed show getting canceled outright before (greenlighted shows get canned before making it to air occasionally, most recently the NBC Coach reboot). And to add insult to injury, days after canceling Hindsight, VH1 announced Black Ink Crew: Chicago, maybe the most befuddling decision by a network since The CW dumped Veronica Mars only to announce Farmer Takes a Wife shortly after.

3. Who is dumb enough to hire Carrie Mathison? I know this is a television show and it would be a boring show if Carrie was forced to get a job at the local mall because she could not get a job in defense again but no one has failed upward more than Carrie, not even Lane Kiffin or Ben Silverman. But on the new season of Homeland, Carrie finds herself with a cushy private contractors job in Germany for some millionaire.

4. Will Community be back for season seven? It was only five short years ago since DirecTV started the modern trend of saving lowly rated but beloved franchises. The trend continues this fall after Hulu saved The Mindy Project. But the big news last year was Yahoo Screen was going to get into the scripted forum by saving Community even though it lost yet another castmember when Shirley went to hang out with Matthew Perry (not to mention the Pierce replacement left to costar in the Breaking Bad prequil). New episodes debuted last spring, I watched the first couple the weekend they came out but eventually forgot about it and still have two or three to watch. Yahoo Screen had said they have interest in doing another season (their two other two original comedies have yet to set the internet aflame even though the one with the AT&T girl, Other Space, is kind of, almost watchable) except star Joel McHale has pretty much said they do not have enough money to pay the cast what they expect now that their contracts expire. I am fine with this because I really could not get up watching the show on the interest, seriously Yahoo Screen, if you want to be taken seriously, at least make a Playstation app so I can watch this on my television. Really, just make a crappy Community movie and be done with it.

Did Deacon survive his surgery? The big Nashville cliffhanger left with Deacon's life hanging in the balance in the balance. Did he survive? Of course he did.


Here is everything I plan to watch this fall and when they premiere (and one bonus question: why is there so much television on Mondays and Wednesdays and basically nothing on Thursday?):

Mondays
8:00 - The Big Bang Theory (September 21)
8:00 - Supergirl (premieres at 8:30 on October 26, 8:00 the following week)
8:00 - Gotham (September 21, Fox)
8:00 - Switched at Birth (already started, ABC Family)
8:00 - The Voice (September 21, NBC)
10:00 - Blindspot (September 21, NBC)
10:00 - Castle (September 21, ABC)
10:00 - Legends (November 2, TNT)

Tuesdays
8:00 - The Muppets (September 22, ABC)
9:00 - Marvel's Agents of SHIELD (September 29, ABC)
10:00 - Wicked City (October 27, ABC)

Wednesdays
8:00 - Survivor: Second Chances (September 23, CBS)
8:00 - The Middle (September 23, ABC)
8:30 - The Goldbergs (September 23, ABC)
9:00 - Modern Family (September 23, ABC)
9:30 - Blask'ish (September 23, ABC)
10:00 - Nashville (September 23, ABC)
10:00 - South Park (September 16, Comedy Central)
10:30 - You're the Worst (September 9, FXX)

Thursdays
9:00 - The Blacklist (October 1, NBC)

Fridays
8:00 - Last Man Standing (September 25, ABC)
9:00 - Grimm (October 30, NBC)
11:00 - Continuum (Already Bac, Syfy)

Sundays
8:00 - Once Upon a Time (September 27, ABC)
8:00 - The Librarians (November 1, TNT)
9:00 - Homeland (October 4, Showtime)
9:00 - The Walking Dead (October 11, AMC)
10:00 - Quantico (September 27, ABC)
10:00 - The Affair (October 4, Showtime)

The Eleventh Scooter Television Awards

Welcome to the 11th Annual Scooter Television Awards honoring show that aired a majority of their season between July 2014 and June 2015. Without further ado, here are the winners of the 2014 STA's:

Best Scripted Show: Justified

Best Sitcom: Blackish

Best Sci-Fi Show: Orphan Black

Best Comic Book Adaptation: Marvel's Agent Carter

Best Animated Show: Star Wars: Rebels

Best Reality Show (Competition): The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II

Best Reality Show (Documentary): Sing it On

Best Talk Show: Pardon the Interruption

Best New Show: Marvel's Agent Carter

Guiltiest Guilty Pleasure: Hindsight

Best Awards Show: 2015 Grammy Awards

Best Hour of TV: Fight - Masters of Sex

Best Half Hour of TV: Martin Luther Skiing Day - Blackish

Biggest Shocker: Paige telling someone who her parents really are

Worst Idea: Bringing back Resurrection for a second season

Worst Moment: Carrie seducing her target on Homeland

Biggest Disappointment: It took Paige this long to learn her parents are Russian

Best New Title Sequence: The Affair

Best Dance Sequence: Alison and Donnie Hendrix rap video homage

Best Character: Alison Hendrix (Orphan Black)

Best New Character: Peggy Carter (Marvel's Agent Carter)

Best Recurring Character: Ronald Pierce (Ray Donovan)

Best Guest Appearance: Lady Sif (Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.)

Best Duo: Raylan Givens and Boyd Crowder (Justified)

Most Entertaining Reality “Star”: Nany Gonzalez (The Challenge)

Most Annoying Reality “Star”: The men of Survivor:Worlds Apart

Show That Should Be Brought Back: Hannibal

Most Anticipated New Show of Next Season: Blindspot

Biggest Question for 2015-2016: What happened to Becca in the elevator?

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 5/2/15

Mad Men: Right before the episode started, I thought to myself, I hope we get a Trudy sighting before the series runs out. Luckily we actually got one moments later with one of the more entertaining scenes in the series history with Pete and his family's hundred years feud with the headmaster (ironically the episode was actually directed by Lane Price himself as Lane punching Pete may be the number one best scene and Pete finally got his revenge on someone else's face). The rest of the episode felt like deja vu with Sterling Cooper looking to break free from their overlords once again. But surprisingly is did not work this time. But the most shocking moment of the episode was Peggy actually talking about her kid for the first time since I believe the second season when he was being taken care of by her mother. I just thought they completely dumped that story line and would never mention it again.
You can download Mad Men on iTunes.

Revenge: I was not totally convinced Victoria killed herself last week, and this week I am convinced she is still around somewhere. But then that begs the question of did she actually implanted her teeth into a corpse or payed someone to change the records. And sure her video was deleted from the server, but couldn't Nolan and his infinite computer knowledge just undelete it? Seems like something that can easily be done. Or at the very least, wouldn't it still be saved in Emily's cashe? Not that it should matter at all because there has to be surveillance footage of Emily at the air field, it would be hard to believe that is the only air field in America without cameras all over the grounds.
You can download Revenge on iTunes.

Gotham: Well, we finally learned where Harvey's proverbial line is this week and it is donkeys. Funniest part of an otherwise dark episode. Odd that Barbara told The Ogre to kill her parents, I just assumed she would say to target the good doctor instead. And where does that love triangle from from her, will the guilt drive Jim back into Barbara's arms despite the Stockholm Syndrome? I kind of hope they stray from the funny books and have Barbara become the new Ogre because that may be the only way they make the character interesting.
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

Bates Motel: It actually took me to this week to realize that Bob Paris is the same guy who plays Ted Chaough... I was not voted Least Observant in high school for nothing. But anyway. The big new though this week was the return of Bradley... maybe. Is she really there or just a figment of Norman's imagination?
You can download Bates Motel on iTunes.

Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Boooo, they should have let Simmons kill Ward, would have been poetic. But hey, we got an Age of Ultron spoiler: the Avengers are going to go after Loki's spear. Um, nice tie in, I guess.
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Survivor: Blue Collar vs. White Collar vs. No Collar: Shame that Shirin did not win Immunity too, that would have made for an interesting Tribal. Granted we almost got an almost was an all time Tribal Council with Mike threatening to use his Hidden Immunity Idol. Too bad Will was the only one dumb enough to switch his vote (Tyler definitely had to just in case Mike was not bluffing, but Will, again, showed he was a moron) but it was obvious that Mike was bluffing if he was not willing to hand over the Idol pre-vote. Now the question is if Dan finally realized he is on the bottom. Too bad it may have been too late because if he does team back up with Mike and is able to pull in Sierra, the best they could do is tie the vote even with his extra vote. Then again they could always get Will to do something stupid again.
You can download Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 4/19/15

Once Upon a Time: Oh yeah, I forgot Robin Hood was out there somewhere. I also forgot just how boring he is. Maybe the show can turn him into a wolf or something.

Mad Men: Weird that Betty and company showed up in the first scene and were not seen again after that. I audibly groaned when I saw them thinking we were going to have to sit through another boring Betty story line. Instead we got the loathsome Harry who managed to to creep on Megan before the ink on the divorcee papers was even dry, or technically before there was any ink on them at all. Overall a pretty meh episode even if we mostly avoided the Francis clan, it definitely needed more Ken.
You can download Mad Men on iTunes.

Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Holy Billy Riggins sighting! But why are they wasting his talents on just knocking on the door to a bathroom? He did not even get to run into his sister-in-law. Oh well. So we finally learned how May get her title of The Calvary before taking a desk job until Coulson brought her back into the field. Fine, whatever, But maybe the most interesting part of SHIELD this week was Clarke Gregg Skyping into Jimmy Kimmel Live during a fan Q and A segment to ask any of the Avengers if they ever thought about working on the small screen which was met by deafening silence by the six movie stars. Ouch. Guess none of The Avengers will learn Coulson is not so dead anytime soon.
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Justified: For the third time in the series history, the finale episode featured the song No One Gets Out of Harlan Alive. This turned out to be one big red herring because everyone who has been around from the first season was able to get out of Harlan with their heart still beating: Raylan, Boyd, Ava, even Wynn Duffy moved to an undisclosed location presumably to to door to door dog grooming.

Not that it was a satisfying ending. Raylan got in a few more great zingers, the best being, "Try this one" as he kicked a gun to Boyd after admitting he was out of bullets. Then Raylan did get his one last showdown with Boone that even though you knew was coming the moment he stepped on screen did not make it any less epic. Raylan is actually losing his touch because he actually let Boone get a shot off.

As it seems to becoming standard for television shows, we got a "four years later" coda, most surprising being that Raylan did not get the girl (whatever did happen to Jackie Nevada), Ava had a chid of her own and we finally learn why Boyd and Raylan just could not kill each other: they were brothers in arms who just took different paths, and they managed to help each other get out of Harlan alive.

All that is left now is figuring out where the show lands in the Pantheon of all time great television shows. I am ready to call it the best of the first half of this decade. As for all time, the show boasts the all time greatest opening of all time (Raylan giving the crime boss twenty-four hours to leave town and the time is up), one of the greatest antagonist of all time in Mags Bennett (sorry Boyd). Really only two demerits: the drag of the Michael Rappaport season and the flimsy heal turn by Ava, shaking up with her brother-in-law who was more evil than the man she killed. Still, if there were a Television Hall of Fame, you could make an easy argument for Justified in five years.
You can download Justified on iTunes.


Survivor: Blue Collar vs. White Collar. vs. No Collar: I liked how Probst refused to verify the validity of the Hidden Immunity Idol for Mike. Fake Idols are not made on this show enough anymore. Other that, a pretty boring episode as we are in the long decimation of the smaller alliance post merge that happens most seasons. They should really double up those eliminations into one episode when that happens to speed things up. Hopefully the promo for next week was not a red herring and that Mike and the Masshole go after each other (which hopefully results in the Masshole's elimination).
You can download Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar on iTunes.

The American's: When Martha found out Clark was not who he said he was I thought, well he has to kill her now. With her cracking and about to go home I thought, oh yeah, Clark is taking off his wig so Martha knows exactly who he is before he kills her. Except the episode just faded to black. But she cannot possibly survive the season. And with the season finale next week, someone has to finally take the fall for the bugged pen. Martha death making it look like a suicide because of guilt over betraying her country but I still think Stan may actually going to get caught trying to free Nina that he gets fingered.
The Americans on iTunes.

Nashville: Juliet's irrational post pregnancy moods is really the most entertaining she has ever been.
You can download Nashville on iTunes.