Saturday, December 23, 2006

Worst Songs of 2006

It’s no secret that the Top 40 radio is dieing off thanks to shrinking playlists and more specialized stations. So in honor of that I present to you the 40 Worst Songs of 2006. And you know you have compiled a list of some crappy songs when Kevin Federline doesn’t crack the Top 10. It’s disturbing how many of the “artist” on this list come from reality television (for those keeping track at home, fifteen songs were from reality stars which beats out songs that “feature” by one) showing that record executives are too lazy to find nor market good artists. And not surprisingly the same artists that topped the Worst Albums of the Year list do the same here taking up three of the worst three songs of the year. Download these songs from iTunes at your own risk and feel free to let me know what songs of the past year that you dislike in the comment section:

1. Nothing In This World - Paris Hilton
2. About Us - Brooke Hogan featuring Paul Wall
3. London Bridge - Fergie
4. Stars Are Blind - Paris Hilton
5. Wind it Up - Gwen Stefani
6. I'm N Luv (Wit a Stripper) - T-Pain featuring Mike Jones
7. My Love - Justin Timberlake featuring T.I.
8. I Write Sins Not Tragedies - Panic! at the Disco
9. Fergalicious - Fergie
10. Welcome to the Black Parade - My Chemical Romance
11. U & Ur Hand - Pink
12. Show Stopper - Danity Kane
13. Lose Control - Kevin Federline
14. Lips of an Angel - Hinder
15. Come to Me - Diddy featuring Nicole Scherzinger
16. Do I Make You Proud - Taylor Hicks
17. Stupid Girl - Pink
18. The Real Thing - Bo Bice
19. Invisible - Ashlee Simpson
20. Goodbye My Lover - James Blunt
21. Ms. New Booty - Bubba Sparxxx featuring Mr. ColliPark & Ying Yang Twins
22. The Kill - 20 Seconds to Mars
23. Shoulder Lean - Young Dro featuring T.I.
24. Hood Boy - Fantasia featuring Big Boi
25. Control Myself - LL Cool J featuring Jennifer Lopez
26. Chain Hang Low - Jibbs
27. Let U Go - Ashley Parker Angel
28. It's Goin’ Down - Yung Joc featuring Nitti
29. Land of Confusion - Disturbed
30. Lean Wit It, Rock Wit It - Dem Franchize Boyz featuring Peenut & Charlay
31. SexyBack - Justin Timberlake featuring Timbaland
32. Maneater - Nelly Furtado
33. Hate Me - Blue October
34. What's Left of Me - Nick Lachey
35. I Belong to Me - Jessica Simpson
36. Sideline Ho - Monica
37. Unpredictable - Jamie Foxx featuring Ludacris
38. So Excited - Janet Jackson featuring Khia
39. Hanging On - Cheyenne Kimball
40. Buttons - Pussycat Dolls featuring Big Snoop Dogg

Friday, December 22, 2006

Worst Albums of 2006

Throughout the last twelve months I have reviewed over a hundred albums and sadly some of them were not exactly good thanks to record executives using non traditional ways to find new artist in recent years like reality shows. Plus they unwisely thought that just because an artist had a lot of friends on MySpace means that they can make good music. Now my list is only of albums that I reviewed since there way too many American Karaoke contestants that didn’t even win releasing albums and the My Chemical Romance album was so bad I couldn’t even make thought the whole album. So here’s the worst of the worst and if you are interested in reading my original review, click the link below the album, the album link goes to iTunes if you enjoy torture:

1. Paris - Paris Hilton

Since I'm Already Screwed, Here's a Message to You

2. Undiscovered - Brooke Hogan

Musings from the Back 9: VH1 Reality Albums Edition (third item)

3. The Dutchess - Fergie
Toss Up: Clay Aiken vs Fergie

4. Taylor Hicks - Taylor Hicks
I Got My Degree in Crying

5. I’m Not Dead - Pink
It's Hypocritical of You

6. Playing with Fire - Kevin Federline
I'm Kevin Federline, America's Most Hated

7. A Thousand Different Ways - Clay Aiken
Toss Up: Clay Aiken vs Fergie

8. FutureSex/LoveSounds - Justin Timberlake

Go 'Head Be Gone with It

9. Danity Kane - Danity Kane
Musings from the Back 9: Music Edition (second item)

10. What’s Left of Me - Nick Lachey
Musings from the Back 9: Music Edition (forth item)

11. Cassie - Cassie
It's Not that Deep

12. The Sweet Escape - Gwen Stefani
This Sounds like Disco Tetris

13. Press Play - Diddy
I'm from the Eighties NYC Five Percent of Culture

14. On an Island - David Gilmour
It's Just the Dice You Roll

15. The Day Has Come - Cheyenne Kimball
This Is Gonna Rock Until it Rolls

16. Blowin’ Up - Jamie Kennedy & Stu Stone
Goodnight Michelle

17. B’Day - Beyoncé
I Could Have Another You in a Moment

18. A Public Affair - Jessica Simpson
If You Want to Impress a Hick Then Make it Go Tick

19. In My Mind - Pharrell
I Know this Part Ain't Pretty but You Know I'll Be Busy

20. We Don’t Need to Whisper - Angels & Airwaves
Everyone Will Listen Even if it Hurts Sometimes

21. The Phoenix - Lyfe Jennings
Musings from the Back 9: Music Edition (third item)

22. Goodbye Alice in Wonderland - Jewel
I’m Embarrassed to Say the Rest Is Rock n Roll Cliché

23. The High Road - JoJo
Your Chance Has Come and Gone

24. Bat Out of Hell III: The Monster Is Loose - Meat Loaf
There Were Moments of Gold and Flashes of Light

25. Release Therapy - Ludacris
Musings from the Back 9: Music Edition III (first item)

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Best Free Songs of 2006

You can’t get better than free, right? That’s why every Tuesday the first thing I do is open up iTunes because ever week they have two or three free songs to download. Most of the songs are at most mediocre but everyone once in a while you can find a gem. In fact, the number one downloaded song of 2006 on iTunes, Bad Day by Daniel Powder, was a song you could have gotten free back in 2005 (same for number seven Over My Head (Cable Car) by The Fray). Now here are the best free songs that iTunes offered up this year but are still worth the .99 if you didn’t pick them up when they didn’t cost a thing. Of course if you don’t believe my judgment - you can click the link and it will open iTunes directly to the song and you can pull a Michael Scott and just play the 30 second sample over and over again.

1. Smile (Radio Edit) - Lily Allen
2. Dynomite (Going Postal) - Rhymefest
3. Steady, As She Goes (Acoustic Version) - The Raconteurs
4. Cash Machine - Hard-FI
5. Put Your Records On (Acoustic) - Corinne Bailey Rae
6. Mr. Sunshine - Lori McKenna
7. Mama’s Room - Under the Influence of Giants
8. Travelin’ Thru - Dolly Parton
9. Blush (Only You) - Plumb
10. How Many Times - Zack Hexum
11. Satisfied - Ashley Monroe
12. Ooh La La - Goldfrapp
13. Hell or High Water - Tinsley Ellis
14. New Shoes - Paolo Nutini
15. Grace (Album Version) - Phil Wickham
16. What’s the Use - Jamie Lidell
17. Ain’t No Reason - Brett Dennen
18. Suzie - Boy Kill Boy
19. Never Saw Blue (Full Length Drums Mix) - Hayley Westenra
20. Crowded (Radio Edit) - Jeannie Ortega featuring Papoose
21. Love Me like You - The Magic Numbers
22. Hide Away - Rock Kills Kid
23. Back Home to Me - Sophie Milman
24. Bad Things - Jace Everett
25. True Affection - The Blow

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Winter Television Preview

Tomorrow I dive head deep into my year end festivities that will overflow into the new year (if you would like to partipate in the 9th Green Reader’s Poll then e-mail me you top ten favorite songs of the past year in order to and so today I’d like to highlight some shows that will be airing early in the new year before I get bogged down in all things 2006.

Let’s Rob Mick Jagger

Number one on the list of shows that premiere next year is Knights of Prosperity, or as I like to call it Let’s Rob Mick Jagger. The show landed at number two on my preseason poll for fall shows before ABC unceremoniously pulled it for midseason. The show is from the guys behind Ed and stars Daniel Logue, better known as the cabbie from the early 90’s MTV ad campaign and follows him and his buddies around as they, well, try to rob Mick Jagger. The show debuts Wednesday January 3 at 9:00. Check out a music video from the show below.

I’m From Rolling Stone

For years it seems like reality shows on MTV have gotten trashier and trashier (see the evolution of The Real World to Laguna Beach to My Super Sweet 16) but here’s one I’m looking forward to and surprisingly it actually as something to do with music. It’s been a while since MTV had a show that had at least a little to do with music and no, getting a rapper to host a show about fixing up cars doesn’t count. The show follows six interns for the magazine around for a summer and at the end of it one gets a job with editor in the title. The show starts Sunday January 7 at 10:00 and you can check out a trailer below.

The White Rapper Show

This could be the greatest show in the history of VH1 or the biggest train wreck. But if we have learned anything from Flavor of Love those two are not necessarily exclusive. Yet again here’s a show on a music channel that actually has to do with music. Could this be a sign that both networks will be going back to their roots? Probably not. That may be for the best because this is the network that has The Pussycat Dolls at number #1 on the Top Forty Videos of 2006. No seriously. The show drops Monday January 8 at 10:30 (and this is VH1 so it will be repeated multiple time throughout the week so don’t worry about it conflicting with Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip). Here is the ad for the so with judges M.C. Search and Prince Paul.

Beauty and the Geek 3

This first season of Beauty and the Geek was up there with the greatest reality seasons of all time. The second season: not so much. Hopefully the show breaks the sophomore slump with the new crop of token hot chicks and loveable losers with the two hour premiere on Wednesday January 3 at 8:00. Yeah it conflicts with Let’s Rob Mick Jagger but this is why God gave us VCR’s (or TIVO’s for you pretentious types). The first clip (which is borderline not safe for work) is of Sanjay, who gets the moniker “Virgin” as he sells himself to the girls. The second features beauties Megan Hauserman “Playboy Model” and Cecille “Bikini Model” (which is moderately safe for work but will lower your IQ if watched). And before you ask, the Scooter in the cast is not me.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

If You Asking Why Is Hip Hop Dead There’s a Pretty Good Chance You’re the Reason it Died

Hip Hop Is Dead - Nas

For old school hip hop fans we don’t need Nas to tell us that Hip Hop Is Dead as we have know for some time now that it was. For proof look no further than the recent Grammy nominations where there were no rappers represented in the big four categories (Album, Song, Record, New Artist). The big question is who killed it: Was it Eminem who made it socially acceptable for thirteen year old suburban white chicks to listen to the genre? Or Nelly who took a step further and recorded a song with the very un-hip *NSYNC (and later with Tim McGraw)? Maybe it was Nas himself who sampled In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida not once but twice recently here on the title track of Hip Hop Is Dead.

But throughout the album Nas doesn’t call out names of who is responsible, even on the track Who Killed It?, instead he throws a blanket of blame over the commercialization of the genre and even hints at his motivation during the title track when he raps, “Nas rap is compared to legitimized crap.” The rest of the album plays out like a eulogy even giving love to those who never got the commercial success, most notably on the James Brown sampling Where Are They Now?, unlike their excessive bling wearing modern day counterparts. This is even though they laid the foundation that enabled the current stars to gain an embarrassment of riches that they are more than happy to show off on Cribs.

On Got Ur Self a... off of Stillmatic, Nas started one verse by say “My first album had no famous guest appearances, the outcome, I’m crowned the best lyricist” which was more than you regular boisterous rapper claim as there was plenty of truth in that statement. In early stages of this album, Nas suggested that his next would be without any guest and would be solely produced by D.J. Premier of Gang Starr but Hip Hop Is Dead ended up with a few guest appearances along with plenty of big name producers. Premier is conspicuously absent which makes me wonder if that album was just put on the back burner.

What hurts Nas the most is when he when he brings in those guest because rarely do they usually pale in comparison to one of the best lyricist. This most evident with The Game on QB True G who spend most of his verse blowing smoke at Nas and Dr. Dre who produced the track. This is also evident on Play on Playa with Snoop Dogg, but the track itself is not up to par thanks to the blandest producer in recent memory, Scott Storch. Ironically Nas opens up the song by ripping on the Hilton sisters when it is Storch who we can thank for Paris’s train wreck of an album. Another producer who couldn’t provide Nas a decent beat was Chris Weber for Blunt Ashes. And yes, it’s that Chris Webber.

But after a few boring guest spots and a mediocre comeback album, Nas’s onetime nemesis and current boss at Def Jam, Jay-Z seems revitalized on Black Republican a song that samples Marcia Religiosa from Godfather III, by far his best effort since coming out of retirement. Kanye West produces and gives a verse on Still Dreaming though doesn’t live up to their collaboration on We Major form West’s latest album. West does a much better job with the other song he produces on the disk Let There Be Light but it is the unknown Tre Williams that steals the song with his soulful hook.

And even though I ripped on it in the intro, the produced title track is a stand out track that uses more than the Iron Butterfly sample including the go to sample for old school cats, Apache by the Incredible Bongo Band as well show stopping ending with Nas rapping over a crowd shouting “Hip Hop.” But no high priced producer was need for the closer Hope where Nas goes acappella for most of the track. Although like with every Nas album not named Illmatic, this one is uneven at times, but as long as there are rappers like Nas and his ilk, there is still hope for a hip hop resurrection.

Song to Download - Let There Be Light

Hip Hop Is Dead gets a Terror Alert Level: High [ORANGE] on my Terror Alert Scale.

Monday, December 18, 2006

My Prize Was That I Fell in Love in this Game

Survivor:Many disliked the whole separation by races on the latest installment of Survivor but my biggest complaint for Cook Islands was that they un-segregated too soon. But I wasn’t too surprised that they merged tribes when they did because five members are small to begin with and if you were to lose multiple challenges you would be down to three tribe members. In fact that may have happened if the Hispanics didn’t throw a challenge the Black may have lost the first two challenges. So if there was one thing from Survivor: Race Wars is that never trust Hispanics because they even turn on each other quickly.

No reason to show her aside the obviousWith the Hispanics self destructing and the Blacks unable to perform well at challenges, the season quickly turned into a dog fight between the Asians and the Whities. Unfortunately us Whities got overzealous and made the worst mistake in the game by mutinying. All they had to do was be patient for the merge and since Adam Gentry and Parvati Shallow controlled the one team and Yul Kwon and Jonathan Penner the other, they could have easily gotten down to the final six with Yul and Becky (remember before the mutiny Ozzy Lusth was on the outskirt of his tribe and so they wouldn't have to worry about him in individual immunity).

Would you hook up with Billy?But the best part of this season, and possibly of any season, was Billy Garcia confessing his love for Candice Woodcock before getting voted out. Why, oh why, couldn’t the producers stepped in at that tribal council and said they couldn’t vote Billy out because Billy hooking up with Candice would make great TV. After this I totally advocate that from each season on Jeff Probst should get one veto per season for this reason. Think back to previous season, there is always someone, being a wack job or token hot chick that gets voted off way too early and just ruins the season a little bit. Is anyone opposed to this idea?

Another Survivor, another boring winnerIn the end Yul win as the majority thought his Machiavellian planning was better than Ozzie’s superhuman feats at the challenges. But if merging the races too soon was the worst idea of the season, the three person final tribal was a close second. It was totally unnecessary as seen by Becky not even getting a mercy vote. And what had there been a tie, would they really have the tie breaker months after the final votes were cast? And one thing that backfired yet again was the immunity idol that was hidden on Exile Island was not played for the second time in the two seasons that it has been introduced. Granted none of this will keep we from watching Survivor: Fiji when it starts up next week even though Probst’s suggestion that the most shocking thing a Survivor has even done will happen in Fiji will live up to his hype.

Survivor: Cook Island gets a Terror Alert Level: Elevated [YELLOW] on my Terror Alert Scale.

This installment hasn’t been announced for a release on DVD but hop over to Amazon to see the six of thirteen seasons of Survivor that are available. Or you can download the last five seasons, including Cook Islands on iTunes.

Sunday, December 17, 2006

I've Got to Get to a Library... Fast!

The Da Vinci Code

When the reviews for The Da Vinci Code started coming in all the negativity towards the movie centered on the new haircut that was sporting. You got to love journalist that a movie that threatens the foundation of one of the big three religions and they cared more about Hanks new flowing locks. Granted that movie was based on the novel that I didn’t read on account that, well, I don’t read. Although even if you didn’t read the book it was hard to avoid the controversy of the book that suggested that Jesus was married to Mary Magdalene which produced a kid and that a sect of the Catholic church has been trying to cover the bloodline up ever since by any means necessary.

That is where the movie starts off with a messenger of the church is going around killing the keepers of the truth. And dude’s creepy with the albino hair (although he’s not as pale as he should be if an albino) and inflicts torture on himself so he will suffer much like Jesus did. But for some reason he does the self-torture in the buff that leads to too much albino nudity than I ever need to see. His latest murder brings Hanks, a well known symbolist, to the crime scene to help decipher something (as well as being the patsy for the crime) as well as the victim’s granddaughter played by French actress .

And that is where the movie slows down to the pace of a sloth. Tautou is a bore and hadn’t yet mastered the English language. That is not that she doesn’t talk occasionally in her native tongue along with other characters which leads to way too many subtitles. Seriously, the reason why I watched the movie instead of reading the book was so I wouldn’t have to actually read. But anyways.

Aside from a decent car chase in the first act, the film gets much better with the introduction of as an old colleague of Hanks and Holy Grail expert. It’s almost a different movie with him and the twists and turns begin, although the biggest twist is pretty apparent early in the movie which makes me wonder if the novel was that easy to figure out the ending. But nonetheless, had they started the movie with the introduction of McKellen, the movie as a whole would have been much more enjoyable and less frustrating.

The Da Vinci Code gets a Terror Alert Level: Guarded [BLUE] on my Terror Alert Scale.