Saturday, September 13, 2008

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. XLVI

Quote of the Week: It’s not bad to wear a promise ring because not everybody, guy or girl, wants to be a slut. (Jordin Sparks, MTV Video Music Awards)

NBC Universal on iTunesBig New of the Week: NBC Back on iTunes: It was almost exactly a year ago when NBC Universal decided not to renew their contract that ended at the end of 2007 with iTunes. I predicted that it would get ironed out by the end of the year but maybe the strike put off those talk. But not only is NBC coming back in style as iTunes is now offering their shows in HD, for an extra dollar of course. Although classic episodes are available for $0.99. You will have to scroll down a little to see if NBC is offering anything for free to mark their return. Even though no free episodes, Friday Night Lights also reappeared even though it does not appear on the NBC page or even the Universal Studios page (there is no DirecTV page). And only the first season is currently available.

Coalition Links of the Week:
What was in the water during 2004-05? Buzz salutes the TV season that brought us Lost, House, and Grey's Anatomy. (BuzzSugar)

To celebrate the season (and series) premieres of Gossip Girl and Privileged, we're giving away several copies of the books that started these shows. (RTVW)

Vance is excited that So You Think You Can Dance Canada has finally started AND starts off in his hometown of Toronto where apparently, Canadians really CAN dance! (Tapeworthy)

This week, Jace interviewed The Office's Amy Ryan and Paul Lieberstein and gave five reasons why he loved the latest episode of Mad Men. (Televisionary)

TiFaux got a slew of new contributors this week! To start off her blogging reign at TiFaux, Marisa did a critical analysis comparing Lost and Fringe, discussing the appearance of crazy animals and mad scientists. (TiFaux)

This week, put forth our theory as to who Kelly Taylor's Baby Daddy is! (The TV Addict)

Raoul got all the dirt on the new season of The Sarah Connor Chronicles straight from Lena Headey and exec producer Josh Friedman. (TV Filter)

Greek: Yeah, the whole counting cards thing was a stretch, even with two decks you are not going to get a good hand in a short amount of time to get big winners and certainly in a one hand playoff counting cards isn’t going to work. But it was nice seeing Casey in the bob. And is she really going to go after the RA? You can download episodes of Greek on iTunes.

ABC World News with Charles Gibson: Well that was anticlimactic. The interview wasn’t the home run Sarah Palin cheerleaders wanted not was it the disaster the haters hoped for. The interview itself was a little short and Gibson tried too many “gotcha questions” like the Bush Doctrine. Even Gibson seemed rattled when Palin asked in what respects. Count me as one of the 70% that thinks that semi-automatic riffles should be banned. (Scooter Update: MSNBC posted an article, the Many Versions of 'Bush Doctrine', claiming their are up to seven different versions.)

Free Downloads of the Week: Basically the season premiere from all of NBC’s returning shows of last season is currently free in HD and regular definition including:

30 Rock: Secrets and Lies (link isn't available yet, try the banner at the top of post)
Battlestar Galactica: He That Believeth in Me
Eureka: Bad to the Drone
Heores: Four Months Later
In Plain Sight: Pilot
Life: Pilot
Lipstick Jungle: Pilot (link isn't available yet, try the banner at the top of post)
Monk: Mr. Monk Buys a House
The Office : Fun Run Pt. 1 & 2
Psych: Ghosts
The Rachel Zoe Project: Preview Special
Top Design: Impress the Best

Promo of the Week:

The Big Bang Theory - Season 1 Recap

Pick for Next Week: The Big Bang Theory, Monday at 8:00 on CBS: Slim Pickens a week before the new fall season launches so you can take the time to watch (or re-watch) the season finale of the funniest sitcom of last season where we learn such things as Schrodinger's Cat.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Playing the Percentages vol. I

One of the greatest shows currently is Pardon the Interruption and I have shamelessly steal paid tribute to the show multiple time on the 9th Green and I am going to go to the well once again with a new running post. For those that have seen the show they have a segment called Oddsmakers which the name I have already used for something else so I went with Playing the Percentages which Statboy even admits is a more appropriate name. The kind people over at TV on the Brain will be my archenemies for this game. We will be need our own personal Statboy so if you have a question (any subject like TV, music, movies, or politics welcome) for us to talk about feel free to e-mail me that. And if you want to play the home game, just drop your thoughts in the comments. Now let gets to the game where I will be playing the role of Bernard Pollard and Jo playing the role of Tom Brady.

What are the chances Tina Fey makes an appearance on the season premiere of Saturday Night Live this week?

Scooter: 70%, in a story I broke last week, Sarah Palin is a dead ringer for Tina Fey and since Palin has been the biggest story of the late summer, they will be parodying her and it is safe to assume she is the cold open. I am not guaranteeing that Fey shows up because there might be scheduling conflicts and I actually have Palin herself making an appearance in person at 25%.

Jo: I'm gonna pull a Kornheiser and say 85%! Lorne Michaels would be nuts not to at least ask Tina Fey. Who else is going to play Palin? Kristen Wiig already does most of the journalists, including Campbell Brown. And you can't use Amy Poehler b/c we need some reaction Hilary shots for good measure.

What are the chances that either 90210 or Knight Rider last longer than the originals?

Scooter: A little background first, 90210 lasted ten season while Knight Rider lasted four. With that said, there is no chance 90210 lasts a decade, in fact I only have The CW lasting that long at 40%, so this rests on the hopes of Knight Rider which haves a 10% chance and that only hinges if Ford continues to pony up for their one hour commercial for their brand and if the rating bomb as they are likely, I wouldn't be surprised if the show gets sold into syndication.

Jo: There's a 100% chance that both of these remakes are signs of an impending apocalypse. That or just the end of original ideas in America. 90210 and Knight Rider have a 25% of getting renewed after this year.

What are the chances Opportunities Knocks is the first fall show to be canceled?

Scooter: This is brought up because this had the lowest rating for Hey Nielsen's Fall Preview (which I participated in) at 1.8. And I agree that it will be totally unwatchable to me, and if I am not mistaken Fear Factor did the whole go to people's houses before it finally ended, but I am not a target audience and families could keep this show on air so I give it 2%. As for the show that has the most chance of getting the ax first, I have Do Not Disturb first on that list.

Jo: Is Opportunity Knocks a reality show? All it needs is a regular tearjerker feature about some family's sick parakeet and it'll have a 75% chance of staying on the air.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Cleaning Out My Inbox vol. VII

A plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on Dirty Sexy Money, Raising the Bar, TV Guide, Dancing with the Stars, ION, Crash, Oprah, and Keith Olbermann.

- For those that watch Dirty Sexy Money you will want to check out Tripp Darling’s latest venture into luxury real estate, Darling Tower.

- I do not think I read a review of Raising the Bar that did not focus on the mane of Zack Morris, myself included. It looks like TNT took notice and created an interactive game that lets you change his hair-style to your heart's content. Head over to to play.

- For those gearing up for the new fall season, head over to TV for extensive coverage of over 113 new and returning shows, with recaps, previews, and editors’ picks as well as original videos, unique photo galleries, and four detailed ways for fans to plan their TV watching schedules.

- While at TV Guide you can find exclusive videos including Dancing with the Stars Olympian Misty May Treanor.

- The Bill Engvall Show was surpisingly entertaining and fans should be happy to learn that it has been renewed for a third season. And be on the lookout for two special episodes of the show this December just in time for the holidays.

- For those that have the ION channel, it should be noted that their new season starts up with featuring favorites Boston Legal, ER, and NCIS.

- Crash, which I called the worst movie ever in the history of the world is for some reason being turned into a television show for Starz. Here is a widget for the show that premieres Friday, October 17, 2008 at 10 p.m.

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- This Friday, Tatum O'Neil gives her first interview since her drug bust with Oprah. You will hear Tatum admit, “There’s no good way to talk about what happened to me.” She adds, “I felt hopeless” and tells Oprah, “I was certainly trying to relapse.” While on Thursday the Big O goes into Why Men Cheat with author Gary Neuman. A preview: because she will do things you will not.

- A couple days ago I chided the media for spending two days debating whether or not they were bias and the unprofessionalism over at MSNBC during the conventions. Apparently someone over at the network read that post and demoted Keith Olbermann a couple days later and I added a couple thoughts about it on the bottom of the post. Check out Morons, You are the Press.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

No One Else Will Care if We Win or Lose

Do You Know - Jessica Simpson

Everyone seems to be going country these days, Jewel, Michelle Branch, the dude from Hootie and the Blowfish and even Snoop Dogg hooked with Willie Nelson for a country song. Jessica Simpson being one not to ever set trends has followed suits with adding an occasional fiddle to her songs and submitting it to country radio stations.

The result is Do You Know that leans heavy on emotional ballads with the occasional upbeat song with its token banjo like first single Come on Over. The overall sound seems like Carrie Underwood light with Simpson leaning closer to the easy listening side of the musical spectrum than Underwood does (any patron of gossip rags should find the irony of Simpson once again following in the footsteps of Underwood).

Country fans already weary of Simpson just from judging her first single probably not be converted from the rest of Do You Know as it is the most “country” song on the album along with Still Beautiful. Those two are only topped by the title track that was written by and features Dolly Parton. And these two are a natural pairing Simpson could play Parton in a bio-pic. Well, assuming the casting diroctor on the film isn’y looking for someone that can act to play Parton.

The biggest problem is that most of the songs written for the album are just your run of the mill pop songs that Simpson tries to add some twang to. Country music has a long tradition of storytelling, but all these songs are the same cliche love songs that peppered Simpson’s previous albums. She didn’t even bother to put in a blatant “my dog left me, my wife left me and all I have left is beer to keep me company” tongue and cheek country song. Maybe try New Wave next Jessica because this country thing just isn’t working out.

Song to Download - Do You Know

Do You Know gets a Terror Alert Level: Guarded [BLUE] on my Terror Alert Scale.

Monday, September 08, 2008

We on Award Tour: 2008 Video Music Awards

What the frak happened to the Video Music Awards? Once the bastion of everything cool has turned into the most unwatchable thing on television. Even in the lean years, they were still able to line up legitimate stars. As much as I complained about last year’s show it still featured Kanye West, Alicia Keys, Linkin Park and Foo Fighters. This year is packed with groups that in past years would not have the resume to land them an opening show spot. Really only Kid Rock has actually sold multimillion albums. Seriously, who the frak is Tokyo Hotel? Danity Kane? Yeah, there was no blatant synergy there at all. MTV obviously knew the star power equaled that of your local public access begging to get Christina Aguilara and Kanye West to perform at the last minute pulling Kanye out of his MTV ban a year after promising never to go on the show again.

And it isn’t just the performers that were low star wattage because, the people handing out the moonmen were pretty sad too: Miley Cyrus, the cast of High School Music, the dude from Gossip Girl? You know what the VMA’s have turned into: the Teen Choice Awards. This may be my swan song for the VMA because they have decided that anyone older than fifteen and with male parts could possibly enjoy anything this crap. Here are other complaints with this year’s show:

- Instead of any music in the pre-show we get random people dancing. Um, yeah, okay. I guess that makes sense because all the pre-show quality artists were sadly invited to play on the big show. Yeah, that was the most worthless pre-show ever.

- Ooo, a new Survivor-style version of the Real World/Road Rules Challenge. Can’t wait. One thing I can wait for: another Paris Hilton reality show.

- Who invited Kobe Bryant? Aren’t there too many teenage white girls around for him to be invited to? If you invite Kobe Bryant, shouldn’t you invite Chris Hansen too?

- “Better luck next year T-Pain, if you’re still relevant,” I not sure who the dude who said that, but no truer words were spoken tonight. I bet less than half the people this year won’t warrant an invite next year.

- Britney Spears opening the VMA’s again. Yawn. Have we not learned from Crossroads that she cannot act.

- Wow, the place where the VMA’s took place looked about the size of the TRL set. This is really sad. The economy is really as bad as they say it is.

- I really dislike that Disturbia song, it is an obvious attempt at trying to recreate Thriller but it is no where near as catchy. But I did like the Seven Nation Army interlude. And can we keep the clippers away from Rihanna. It is like ever single she releases she cuts off even more hair.

- Congratulation Russell Brand, you went from hilarious to humongous tool even faster than Dane Cook. I guess I shouldn’t have expected much from a guy who dressed up like Osama bin Ladin the day after 9/11. If you can get on your knees to get Kanye West back, why can’t you do the same for Chris Rock?

- DJ AM and Travis Barker are the house band? Really? Since when is dating reality stars make you relevant?

- For those lucky enough to avoid the Jonas Brother phenomenon, they are basically Hanson but without legitimately catchy songs. That in no insult to Hanson who actually play all the instruments themselves when they play live.

- Luckily we only have to put with ten seconds of Katy Perry singing.

- Yeah, the Michael Phelps hosted Saturday Night Live isn’t going to be any good.

- Why invite Lil’ Wayne to perform if you are just going to censor every third word out of his mouth? Then you have T-Pain who didn’t bother to lip-sync half his performance.

- Did Lindsay Lohan said she had a dance off with AC/DC. When did this happen? Was Angus wearing his kilt? And is it on YouTube? And wasn’t Fannie Pack the people that did that horrible Camel Toe song from a few years ago.

- Paramore: best made for the pre-show.

- Wow, Russell Brand just got put on blast by Jordin Sparks. You go girl.

- Was T.I. just rapping over his song playing on the CD player? That’s some eighth grade talent show stuff.

- Add to my who are these guys list: Josh and Drake.

- I guess it is apropos that Brittany would win three awards at the biggest train wreck of the year.

- Kanye, don’t sing ever again. Ever.

- So there is another VMA, no big surprises and we are stuck at the watercooler again for the forth year in a row with nothing to talk about except about how bad it was.

Sunday, September 07, 2008

Morons, You Are the Press

Over Labor Day hanging out with family, after talking about all the Olympics I watched over the two weeks, someone asked what I was doing to fill that void and really the Democratic and Republican Convention in back to back weeks to fill my around the clock coverage fix because politics are like sports to me to the point that on election nights I pick up a twelve pack, park on the couch and watch the results come in.

Republican National Convention Speeches on iTunesOf course when I say I watched the convention, I only watch talking heads talk about everything and nothing at all talking over basically anyone who hadn’t previous run for president before. I want to hear Bob Casey instead I am stuck listening to some nut job analyzing Hillary Clinton’s body language. I ended up watching most of the RNC on C-Span just so I could watch it unfiltered.

Maybe it was all the long hours, but there is issue after issue of the press being unprofessional, and there was no one more unprofessional than Keith Olbermann who sounded like Gus Johnson during March Madness after Barack Obama’s speech, even admonishing an Associated Press writer, not for being factorially incorrect, but for not calling the speech a symphony instead calling it bland and just the same speech every Democratic nominee has given.

Democratic National Convention Speeches Podcasts on iTunesOn the other hand the only thing missing from his commentary the next week was the Debbie Downer soundtrack. After everyone was glowing over Sarah Palin’s speech, all Keith had to say was that Abraham Lincoln didn’t created the Republican Party (cue the Debbie Downer look). Hey moron, you open any high school history book and it will tell you that he was the first Republican, and you are just nick picking with that. Of course there is probably a reason Olbermann was stuck by himself in New York, because while in Denver both Chris Matthews and Joe Scarborough publicly mocked Keith on air at different times (which isn’t the first time, Scarborough once said Olbermann was “too stupid to be on TV” live on air).

Then Olbermann had the audacity to rip into the Republicans for showing a tribute to 9/11. This would have been like Bill O’Reilly saying that the Democrats were exploiting Martin Luther King Jr. For showing a tribute to him at the DNC. What’s worse is that this came a week after Keith laughed when Michael Moore said on his show that God must be a Democrat because Gustav was starring down on New Orleans days before their convention. So let me get this straight Keith, honoring the brave men and woman who lost their lives during one of the worst attack in American near its anniversary: tacky, implying that God is going to kill Americans to disrupt the RNC two year after one destroyed the same city: funny.

With that said, it is safe to assume I agree with the McCain campaign that the press has been unfair covering Sarah Palin. Case in point, they spent two days debating whether or not they were in fact bias and unfair. Naturally O’Reilly and Sean Hannity came to the conclusions that they were unfair. Morons, you are the press. But the press isn’t complete in the Obama camp as the McCain campaign would have you believe. I missed the first half of Obama’s speech because of the Brown’s preseason game, but NBC cut into the end of the NFL opening game to carry McCain’s speech. Granted preseason was most like an affiliate decision while the next week was the network’s.

There in lies the problem with modern journalism, there are more concerned with making the press than reporting the press which led to debating if they were or were not unfair. Not to the press, if you are talking about the press, you have failed. And these people are just plain lazy. All these shows do anymore is left some right wing nut job and liberal communist spout their talking points on a subject while us in the middle just sit there scratching are heads wondering what the real truth.

Anyone who is listed as a “Republican or Democratic strategist” should be banned from television. Or at the very least call them out when they do just go down their lists of talking point. Seriously, aren’t these guys tired of hearing Joe Trippi saying McCain voted with Bush 90% of the time five times per appearance. And since when does being 0-5 in presidential campaigns makes you a worthy commentator. Just once I would like some respond to that by asking either, “what time frame does that 90% include” or “name one piece of legislation that he sided with Bush” because lets be real, there are a lot of worthless bills Congress votes on like changing French Fries to Freedom Fries. Of course this is why Bush manages to have an approval rating three times that of Congress.

That is when host even invite, Olbermann, hasn’t had anyone on his tow in over two years that disagrees with him, is the second most partisan on television (Glen Beck would be the first). And when legitimate newsmen like Howard Fineman corrects Keith on his lies, Keith is right back to saying the same things the next segment. Yeah Bill O’Rielly is a humongous tool, but at least he invites people with different opinions than his on the show. Granted think he may just do this for the sole reason he has someone to yell at.

But I should applaud Chris Matthews for calling someone out on the crap. Rachel Maddow tried to repeat one of the many lies about Sarah Palin live on air when Matthews actually called her out on it asking her what her source was which she didn’t want to give up until Matthews pressed her four or five time when she finally got her information off the internet. Seriously, the internet was her source. If you get caught referencing the internet for a high school English class you get an automatic “F” on your paper. Yet if you use the internet as a reference on television, apparently you get your own show on MSNBC. But really, how entertaining is the MSNBC company picnic is every year. What does it say that Pat Buchanan gets along with the most people over there.

One thing I did not hear at all about the last two week from either the Democrats, the Republicans, or the press was our national debt which currently sits at 9.7 trillion dollar. $9.7 trillion and not a word about it. To put that in perspective if we paid it off today each American would have to pay $31,000. If you include the implicit debt (which is everything we own plus money we have already pledged to spend) that would come up to $53 trillion. And all these economic problems can be tracked back to the debt, it has destroyed the dollar leading high gas prices, that leads to high prices of consumer goods which leads to foreclosure and failing small businesses that ups the unemployment rate.

Sorry Keith, but this is why the Obama speech failed. His only way to bring in money was to tax the top five percent (which would put the death nail in all the small businesses), but unless that tax rate is 90%, it won’t put a dent into the deficit. And let us not forget, not only does he have no plan to bring in more money, he want to add to the debt by paying college tuition, health care, and other spending that could increase the deficit to the point we might as well be annexed by China we will owe them so much. And he want to give us a rebate, you know, because that worked so well when George Bush did that. (Obama: more Bush failed policies, see I can be a cable news commentator)

And about that free college, what ever happened to “Ask not what your country can do for you but what you can do for your country”? Obama is twisting that and is straight up bribing people to get off their butts to make the world a better. What kind of warped world do we live in when it was the Republican that actually channeled John F. Kennedy by imploring anyone who finds faults with the country to make it better by becoming a teacher, join the armed services, feed a hungry child, defend the rights of the oppressed and if you do so the country will be better and you will be happier.

Not that McCain gets off the hook on the deficit either. He didn’t propose any programs that would increase the budget ten fold like Obama, but he doesn’t have a plan that will put much of a dent into debt. Yeah his energy play should spur the economy if implemented properly and we need to put an end to needless earmarks, but even those are only increasing the debt by only a couple tens a millions a year. You know something wrong when someone says something like “only tens of millions.”

At the current debt I realistically cannot expect either candidate to get the debt erased by the second term let alone their first, but I would at least like to see a plausible pln to get the debt halved by the time they leave office. We are eighteen days away from the first presidential debate but it isn’t until the third that will be focusing on domestic and economic policy and hopefully the moderator Bob Schieffer peppers the candidates on the national debt. But I have learned not to expect much from the press.

In conclusion, I would like to say Go Brown!

Scooter Update 9/8: Apparently someone over at MSNBC read my diatribe because it was announced today that Keith Olbermamm has been yanked from anchor chair on further presidential events replaced by David Gregory. In a story by the New York Times they say, "Tom Brokaw and Brian Williams have told friends and colleagues that they are finding it tougher and tougher to defend the cable arm of the news division" with Brokaw saying Matthews and Olbermann have, "gone too far." (see: MSNBC Takes Incendiary Hosts From Anchor Seat). While on's on website said, "Olbermann began to have difficulty keeping his opinions in check, or simply stopped trying." Oh, snap. Bt my favorite part is when they quoted John Stewart brought up MSNBC in an interview with Brian Williams:

"Is there no control?" Stewart asked him. "‘Is it ‘Lord of the Flies?’"

A sheepish Williams said that every family has a dynamic of its own.

"But does MSNBC have to be the Lohans?" Stewart said.

(see: New Roles for Olbermann, Matthews) Now I really want invited to the next MSNBC picnic.