Saturday, July 21, 2007

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. XXVIII

Before I talk about the past week of television I have a favor to ask you, my readers. To better understand you my audience, I have wanted to create a survey so I can make the 9th Green a better experience for all. As luck would have it, this past week Mike from sent me an e-mail about his site that allows you to create surveys, polls, and quizzes. So I created a survey, The 9th Green Readers Poll, and if you subscribe to this blog or just stop by a couple times a month, please take a minute or two to fill it out and thanks to Mike for the heads up on his site and to anyone who takes the survey.

Big News of the Week: The Emmy Nominations Are Announced: Yawn.

Greek: The good news on the second episode, there was nothing as boring as the second half of the premiere. The bad news: there was nothing as interesting as the first half of last week. But I’ll continue to watch if only the sorority president is what I like to refer to as moderately attractive. Plus Casey and her new Little Sis trying to out Mean Girls each other could prove to be highly entertaining. And does anyone want to take the over/under on when it comes out that Calvin is a gay homosexual? I’ll set the line at half way through the first season. Download the current season of Greek on iTunes.

Pirate Master: Leave it to Pirate Master to come up with a cool twist, bringing back the Ghost Pirates, only to have it completely ruined. C’mon, you have the chance to avenge being cut adrift and you let the scientist/exotic dancer lose the key. With the amount of Alpha Males on the team, how do you let him handle the key at all? So instead of a major shake up we get yet another week of the creepy dreadlocked dude and his cronies leading. One would expect something major happening next week because if not they will have more people with black spots at pirate court then people voting, but this is Pirate Master so expect them to do the wrong thing.

Rescue Me: I am beginning to think the show has hit the wall this season. Most of the storylines have fallen flat this year with the most entertaining with the fraud ended abruptly. Maybe the second wind is coming when the new Probie the new Shawn enters the house whose no grunt work clause with undoubtedly cause friction with Tommy and certainly Old Shawn won’t be too happy. And as much as I rather still have the old chief, the new chief definitely had an entertain introduction, should be interesting to see how his dinner goes.

Lil’ Bush: Finally something funny on this show when Satan says they write all the music for the American Karaokers. Although you have to wonder why all the cartoons on Comedy Central portray the Dark Lord as a gay dude. Download the current season of Lil’ Bush on iTunes.

World Series of Pop Culture: I seem people talk ad nausea about this show and I left some comments showing my feeling for the show so I am going to talk about what I think of the show here and that will be the last time I talk of this show (at least until next year). I do not watch it because the World Series of Pop Culture is a complete and utter sham because they did not invite me to participate because I could totally win that tournament on my own. In the very few times I have happened upon the show I have yet not gotten a question wrong before inevitably switching the channel out of frustration of how much I would destroy the current contestants. Although I will concede that the one tiebreaker I saw - something like there have been ten winners of the Best Supporting Actors in the past fifteen years, name them - which was insanely hard, but it is not like I would ever have the need for a tiebreaker anyways. So VH1, if you want that show to have any once of credibility, be sure to invite me next year.

Pick of the Week: I Hate My 30’s, Thursday, 10:30, VH1: Ever since unrolled I Love the 80’s I have been clamoring for them to do an I Hate the 80’s version. So I was excited to hear the start of I Hate the 30’s so I could hear Hal Sparks and the dude from Ed rip apart those annoying Flappers and wax poetic about The Great Depression. Well that was until I realized it is not I Hate the 30’s but instead I Hate My 30’s, a scripted show. Color me less excited. If you cannot wait until Thursday you can download the first episode for free on iTunes.

Friday, July 20, 2007

Record People Are Shady IX

Colbie Caillat free on iTunesWhen scouring the internet for yesterday’s Don’t Download These Videos I planned to show the video for Bubbly by newcomer Colbie Caillat to once again remind you that you can currently download this song for free on iTunes (well as long as the ad to the right still features her) but I couldn’t because, much like all their videos, the Universal Group has chosen the “Embedded Disable by Request.” I have never understood why anyone would utilize that function because it seems like people are saying, “I want you to check this out but please no free publicity.” If you ever check out YouTube’s most viewed videos for the day, if there is a fan loaded videos of the same music video it is always higher than those put up by UMG that don’t let you embed them. Well this is of course before UMG inevitably has YouTube remove the fan uploaded versions.

Of course I’m sure if you were to ask the record executives why they do this they go back to their usual defense is that doing so would hurt record sales. Yeah because I’m sure there are plenty of people out there that decided not to buy a song or record because a very low quality version of the video it is readily available on some dudes MySpace page. What is really bad is that it not at all hard to get around the “Embedded Disable by Request” thing. Granted I just choose not to do so with these music videos because I make a note not to piss off anyone who is litigation happy. So here is my plea to the UMG, please allow your videos to be embedded, not only will this not hurt your record sales; the more visibility of your music videos will undoubtedly increase sales.

Ms. Caillet’s video isn’t the only video recently that I haven’t been able to highlight because of the dreaded “Embedded Disable by Request” thing. High on the list is the video for Ryan Adam’s Halloweenhead that could have become a viral hit with quirky lyrics and old people dancing but lost that chance thanks to the similarly Walk it Out mash-up the floated around the web last week. UMG, you could have had that buzz with Halloweenhead, which came out earlier, but no on saw because people couldn’t be spread around the web because we couldn’t embed it.

Then there is the new Katharine McPhee song Love Story, which I declared the best song from her otherwise lackluster album. Again here is another song that has gotten zero buzz because UMG won’t let use feature it on out blogs. Granted I wanted to show this video so I could talk about how the further into obscurity McPhee falls, the less cloths she wear. Unfortunately she isn’t attractive enough to make the whole sex sells thing to work. Case in point, she is relegated to the cover of the third rate Men’s magazine Stuff the same month the sometimes moderately attractive Hilary Duff gets the cover of Maxim.

So for those of you that aren’t too lazy to click links here are the previously mentioned videos on YouTube that I am not allowed to embed:

Bubbly - Colbie Caillat (or download the Bubbly video on iTunes)

Halloweenhead (NSFW) - Ryan Adams (or download the Halloweenhead video on iTunes)

Love Story - Katharine McPhee (or download the Love Story video on iTunes)

On a completely unrelated not, to better understand you my audience, I have wanted to create a survey so I can make the 9th Green a better experience for all. As luck would have it, this past week Mike from sent me an e-mail about his site that allows you to create surveys, polls, and quizzes. So I created a survey, The 9th Green Readers Poll, and if you subscribe to this blog or just stop by a couple times a month, please take a minute or two to fill it out and thanks to Mike for the heads up on his site.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Don't Download These Videos vol. XXIV

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I though I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form so here they are courtesy of YouTube. I advise you to watch them before you read my reviews if you don’t want me to spoil things. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available, if not the link goes to YouTube where you can watch the video in full screen). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.

The Underdog - Spoon

This song from Spoon is quite possibly my favorite song of the moment. And the video is so inane with its gratuitous mariachi band cameo and surprise ending it is worth watching again.

Shut Your Eyes - Snow Patrol

I believe this is the fourth video Snow Patrol has released in the past months and almost made a video of all the songs from their latest album. Yet for some reason the one single they haven’t released was my favorite from the disk, Make This Go On Forever. Oh well. Of course maybe they are filming it as I type this.

Rehab - Amy Winehouse featuring Jay-Z

This isn’t the official video for the remix of the Amy Winehouse instant classic as you can tell from the obvious video clips of Jay-Z’s old videos and some sincing problems during Amy’s part but I wanted to highlight it just show you reason number 14 why Jat should have stayed retired. Seriously Hova, “I’m gonna OD until I’m at peace like Anna Nicole,” that makes your verse on Rihanna’s song sound like Blueprint era you.

Garbage - Tell Me Where it Hurts

Garbage releases their greatest hits package next week and like many bands before them they felt obligated to throw on new tracks that really don’t deserve the moniker “Greatest.” The only new song that I can think of that actually deserved to be on a Greatest Hits album would be Mary Jane’s Last Dance. But anyways. Back to the video, what’s sad that, even if it wasn’t their intention here, but whenever anyone shoots anything with a night vision camera, everyone will instantly start thinking of Paris Hilton (who I here is working on a new album, sorry kids with cancer she promised to help when she was done with jail, you will have to wait). And even if the song doesn’t really deserve to be on a greatest hits package, this song is still catchy.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

You Make Me Smile Please Stay for a While Now

Coco - Colbie Caillat

Certainly with temperatures still going up and still plenty of time to hit the beach, local pool, or just on the top of your roof before your summer vacation ends to put some extra color on you body. Some people pass the time working on their tan with the latest trash novel but if you are like me you need some tunes to pass the time, preferable classic beach sounds from the catalog of Jack Johnson. For those who are looking to work something new into their rotation while waiting for a new disk from the surf folk king here is a suggestion, Colbie Caillat.

Born overlooking the Pacific, the twenty-one year old sounds like something best suited for a bonfire along the beach with her breezy acoustic songs with that invite you to sing a long. The best example of from her first album Coco is the infectious debut single Bubbly, which could get even the most annoyingly depressed emo dude to sing along after a couple listens. And if anyone has a karaoke party on the beach, this song should be a prerequisite.

Coco opens with Oxygen, a quintessential song about longing for that special person while trying to figure out how to tell them Colbie sing with just enough power in her voice you will be hoping everything works out and maybe hope that you are who she is singing about. Then there is One Fine Wire which bounces along and if you happen to out walking when this song comes on you may start bouncing like you were on a fine wire.

Caillat come from a decent pedigree, her father Ken co-produced the classic Fleetwood Mac album Rumors as well as the follow-up, Tusk. Though she was more than happy to take her dad’s advice, she balked at the chance to have her father recruit an all star band to help record with. Instead she took a more organic approach leading to an album that isn’t bogged down from overproduction. Caillat even built up her fan base organically, topping MySpace’s top unsigned artist list for a couple months. Coco does suffer a little bit if you are listening to it on repeat which may lead you to hitting the next button on some of the songs in the middle that start feeling repetitive like Realize with lyrics like “If you just realize, what I just realized” but Coco should be a decent soundtrack to the rest of your summer and maybe Caillet will continue to fill your warmer months for years to come.

Song to Download - Bubbly

Coco gets a Terror Alert Level: High [ORANGE] on my Terror Alert Scale.

Want to download Bubbly for free? The song is currently iTunes Free Single of the Week so as long as the banner below features Colbie, click on it to get the song for free. In fact you have my money back guarantee that you will love the song. If you like it, while you are in the iTunes story you can buy the whole album at the discounted price of $7.99, or if you prefer CD’s, Amazon is currently selling it for the same price (see below).

Colbie Caillat free on iTunes

Monday, July 16, 2007

We on Award Tour: 2007 ESPY Awards

2007 ESPYsSurprisingly ESPN’s ESPY Awards have quickly become the most entertaining award show on the circuit these days. Sure there are some major flaws including that of the fans voting which has lead to a football dominated show thanks to the NFL being the most popular league, even though some of the times it doesn’t actually deserve the awards. And I was disappointed this year that they didn’t do their parade of the best of their respective sports this year like they did in the past. But that is made up for thanks to the best montage package each year as well as the emotional high because of the yearly Arthur Ashe Award for Courage segment. Here are some thoughts on this year’s festivities:

- Another glaring problem with the ESPY’s is that it is continually scheduled behind a baseball game leading the show to start late every year, granted the ten minutes this year was a lot better than the over a half an hour last year. And I also totally forgot the pre-show because, again, they relegated it to ESPN2. Oh well.

- The show starts off with shots of athletes in attendance as well as a gratuitous Kate Walsh sighting. Well at least Disney, who owns both ESPN and ABC, didn’t go overboard this year with its blatant synergy plugs with her being the only one this year.

No other reason to show this picture than it is Maria Sharapova in a leather outfit- It is never a good sign how well your monologue is going when a reaction shot of Shaq not laughing at a Shaq and the Beanstalk joke gets a bigger laugh than any of your jokes. When will people realize that Adam Corolla was the genious behind The Man Show, not Jimmy Kimmel? Although TI sitting next to TO makes the least famous Jackson way be the most underappreciated joke since Uma/Oprah.

- At first I thought the whole shower sketch was just a ploy to see Danica Patrick wet but Frank Tarkanian with the towel had me on the floor. Yeah they went a long way for that joke but it was definitely worth it.

- Can we please stop pretending that Carmen Electra is hot? Her and all the chicks with clown boobs on the wrong side of thirty-five just need to go away sooner than later.

- LeBrentourage: good idea, bad execution. Too bad they couldn’t do a live action version, which would have been a lot more entertaining. But obviously there would been too many scheduling conflicts.

Kay Yow gets the very first Jimmy V Award- We get our very first Jimmy V Perseverance Award this year. Great, another segment that will make me bawl like a twelve year old girl each year. And the inaugural recipient, NC State basketball coach Kay Yow, hit a little too close to home as she battle breast cancer for the third time.

- Ironic that they show Shawn Merriman, who got an invite to the show even though he got hit with a suspension this year for using a performance enhancing drugs, during Best Record Breaker considering Big Head Barry will most likely be up for the award next year.

Taryne Mowett and the chick that couldn't pronounce her name- I had a little laugh when they chose Heartbreaker to play during Best Female Athlete. That is slightly sexist. Speaking of sexist, the award goes to the hottest chick in the field (full disclosure: I think I voted for Taryne Mowett for that very reason). Then Kate Walsh embarrasses herself by not even being able to pronounce the winner’s name even though they just said her name just seconds before segment. Seriously, they gave this girl her own show?

The Aurthur Ashe Winners- Then there was the Arthur Ashe Award for Courage this year handed out to Trevor Ringland and Dave Cullen, a Catholic and Protestant both from Northern Ireland who are both active in Peace Players, an organization devoted to bridge social divides through sport. For more on the program or to donote, check out their website.

- Not the best idea to follow the Arthur Ashe Award with LeBron James materialism obsessed song set to Bobby Brown’s My Prerogative.

- Ugg, another Dane Cook sighting. It is like the more exposure he gets, the less funny he becomes.

- Did they seriously announce Franco as the dude from The Bronx Is Burning? Did anyone actually watch that? Certainly more people know him as the dude from Rescue Me.

- Great moment backstage with Kevin Durant backstage talking about his ESPY for Best College Athlete with, out of nowhere, Greg Oden jumps into frame to brag about getting second. Too band Grampa Oden will be stuck in the Pacific Northwest because this may be the last time we see him.

- Who invited Kelly Clarkson? Usually they pair up the athletes with actors so there is at least someone up there that can read teleprompters (Kate Walsh not withstanding). But it was funny when the random dude who turns left for a living opened up the card and tilted towards Kelly to read, only to announce the winner himself.

- LaDainian Tomlinson wins Best Male Athlete? Yeah I would vote for him as the Best Fantasy Player but not Best Male Athlete. Rodger Federer was robbed.

- The end musical number was a little cluttered with Macy Grey, the Dap Kings, Rocco DuLucia, and Common all taking turns. But it is not like the night is about music.

Sunday, July 15, 2007

Lyrics Quiz: Live Earth

Two years ago today was the very first Lyrics Quiz I ever had here at the 9th Green. Actually it was two years and five days ago as the first quiz took place on the tenth before it moved to its regular spot on the fifteenth of each month. That very first quiz was taken from artist that performed during the Live 8 concerts and it is only apropos that on the anniversary of the Lyrics Quiz I would dedicate this month to another charity event, Live Earth. Certainly we can argue whether these concerts did any good but one thing I’m sure we can all agree on is that there was plenty of great music. So as customary of any Lyrics Quiz, please post your guesses, title and artist, in the comment section (or e-mail me) and if you are correct I will unbold the lyric and give you credit. Bonus points to anyone who guesses to the artist(s) who preformed the song at Live Earth if not done by the original artist. The Lyrics Quiz is for entertainment purposes only so please do not use anything besides your own meandering mind to help you up with the answers. Now onto the Lyrics Quiz:

17. This artist said at Live Earth that he was no longer waiting for change.
21. This band touch on global warning with their latest album's cover art.

1. People are lonely and only animals with too many tools that can build all the junk that we sell sometimes it makes you want to yell. (The Horizon Has Been Defeated - Jack Johnson; guessed by Slaygal1981)
2. Now I’m towing my car, there’s a hole in the roof. My possessions are causing me suspicion but there’s no proof. (Don't Dream it's Over - Crowded House; guessed by Monique)
3. There’s no alibi ‘cause I’ve drawn regret from the truth of a thousand lies. (What I've Done - Linkin Park; guessed by Slaygal1981)
4. We must engage and rearrange and turn this planet back to one. (Are You Gonna Go My Way - Lenny Kravitz; guessed by Monique)
5. There’s too many men, too many people making too many problems, and not much love to go round. (Land of Confusion - Genesis; guessed by Monique)
6. Forget what we're told before we get too old. Show me a garden that's bursting into life. (Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol; guessed by Slaygal1981)
7. Sunday all the lights of London shining, sky is fading red to blue. (Babylon - David Gray; guessed by Slaygal1981)
8. And so it is, just like you said it should be. We’ll both forget the breeze. Most of the time. (The Blower's Daughter - Damien Rice; guessed by Slaygal1981)
9. This ain’t a movie no. No fairy tale conclusion ya’ll. It gets more confusing everyday. (Ordinary People - John Legend; guessed by Slaygal1981)
10. Papers in the roadside tell of suffering and greed. Here today, forgot tomorrow. (Ordinary World - Duran Duran; guessed by Slaygal1981)
11. To get there quick, by street but not the freeway, turn that trick to make a little leeway. (By the Way - Red Hot Chili Peppers; guessed by Slaygal1981)
12. Blue as the sky, sunburnt and lonely. Sipping tea in the bar by the roadside. (Put Your Records On - Corrine Bailey Rae; guessed by Slaygal1981)
13. Trust I seek and I find in you every day for us something new. Open mind for a different view. (Nothing Else Matters - Metalica; guessed by Slaygal1981)
14. The bigger the cushion, the sweeter the pushin’. (Big Bottom - Spinal Tap; guessed by Slaygal1981)
15. Too sweet to be sour too nice to be mean. On the tough guy style I'm not too keen. To try to change the world I will plot and scheme. (Intergalatic - Beastie Boys; guessed by Slaygal1981)
16. I’m a new day rising. I’m a brand new sky to hang the stars upon tonight. (Times Like These - Foo Fighters; guessed by Slaygal1981)
17. Now we see everything that's going wrong with the world and those who lead it.
18. Some people live for the fortune. Some people live just for the fame. Some people live for the power, yeah. Some people live just to play the game. (If I Ain't Got You - Alicia Keys; guessed by Slaygal1981)
19. I live with my justice and I live with my greedy need. I live with no mercy and I live with my frenzied feeding. I live with my hatred and I live with my jealousy. I live with the notion that I don’t need anyone but me. (Don't Drink the Water - Dave Matthews Band; guessed by Slaygal1981)
20. To the hustlers, killers, murderers, drug dealers even the strippers. To the victims of Welfare for we living in hell here. (Jesus Walks - Kanye West; guessed by Slaygal1981)
21. And what do you want? I want to change. And what have you got, when you feel the same?
22. Walked out this morning, don’t believe what I saw. A hundred billion bottles washed up on the shore. (Message in a Bottle - The Police; guessed by Monique)
23. I see skies of blue and clouds of white. (What a Wonderful World - Louis Armstrong; Bonus - Paulo Nutini; guessed by Slaygal1981)
24. Where did all the blue skies go? Poison is the wind that blows from the north and south and east. (Mercy, Mercy Me (The Ecology) - Marvin Gaye; Bonus - Alicia Keys; Corrine Bailey Rae and John Legend; guessed by Slaygal1981)
25. War, children, it's just a shot away. (Gimme Shelter - Rolling Stones; Bonus - Keith Urban and Alicia Keys; guessed by Slaygal1981)

There have been over 500 different lyrics and more than 80 different participants in the past two year. And after twenty-four months, here is the leader board in term of all-time points (and of course check out the Winners List on the side board).

Slaygal1981 - 67
Angie - 51
Dara - 44
Tony - 36
Sha Shinizzle - 32

So be sure to be back every fifteenth of the month (I suggest subscribing to my feed) and maybe you will be up there by the third anniversary.