The first thing I do everyday when I fire up the computer and hop onto the internet is to check out ESPN.com, which is my homepage, to check out the main headlines and have the page customized so it also has the top headlines for my favorite team then quickly answer the current poll. But this only takes a couple seconds as I then spend the majority of my time on Page 2 of the site which is basically editorials by some great writers like Bill Simmons and Dan Shanoff who writes the Daily Quickie which is basically a one person, written version of Pardon the Interruption (who rudely reminded me that today is the annaversary of The Drive). But when I open Page 2 yesterday, this image was staring back at me:
Needless to say as a Browns fan I found the cartoon as painful as the guy in it must felt. The cartoon goes along with Page 2's NFL Misery Index where they rated each team on six criteria to determine which NFL team's fan has suffered the most. Of course my hometown team topped the list beating the Saints out by a whole point and the Houston Oilers/Texans by almost five points. (On a side note, I thought the Oilers turned into the Titans, did I miss something?) But things could have been worse because I think they low-balled the Browns on some of the categories like recent pain was only a 6.0. In the past ten years we had a team unceremoniously move going four years without a team only to come back to be mired in bad drafts and bad coaching. Then in our one playoff appearance, our rivaPittsburghrg came back from behind to beat us for the third time that year. It should at least warrant a 9.0. They then end the Browns section with "Lousy teams, painful losses, a hijacked team. Sheesh. The only thing missing from the Browns' misery is Kathy Bates' crushing their ankles with a sledgehammer." Ouch, that really hurts.
To add to the misery, Page 2 also released its 25 NFL Misery Moments and indeed the Browns had multiple entrees including the top spot. And it is insulting that we had to share the top spot with the Baltimore Colts because Baltimore ended up getting our team and promptly won a Super Bowl. Then we showed up again at number five with The Fumble. Somehow The Drive didn't make the list even though I found it more miserable to watch than The Fumble.
And in an updated MLB Misery Index, my Houston Astros still in the top ten most miserable landing in at number seven. I should really think about picking new teams (as the St. Louis Blues haven't had thatsuccessucsess in my lifetime and outright stink this year). And while on the subject of the Astros, for anyone interested on what is going to happen to Roger Clemens this season, here is the most logical scenerio I can think of. This does hinge on USA not winning the World Baseball Championship so Clemens cannot go out on top there. So because the Astro did go through arbitration to keep Clemens and are unable to sign him until May. Clemens will take the first month off because he will need rest from the WBC anyways. Then when May comes around he will sign with Astros and have a couple warm up games in the minors where he will pitch to his son who was drafted as a catcher by the Astros in last years draft pitching for the big league team by June which will then boost the Astros into contention after yet another poor start eventually reaching the playoffs and hopefully with Preston Wilson and another bat they pick up along the way and win the World Series thus bolting then into double digets for next years Misery Index.
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