Monday, April 24, 2006

We on Award Tour - 2005 MTV Movie Awards Nominations


Much like the station’s other marquee awards show, the MTV Movie Awards has been in a creative downswing this decade. But unlike the VMA’s, it’s easy to pinpoint were the Movie Awards went wrong, that is when MTV started making movies of there own and the awards show became more of a promotional vehicle for them and nominating movies that don’t deserve it, case in point this year, Dukes of Hazzard. It was a critical and commercial flop yet it garnished multiple nods. The show can save itself with a good host (one hadn’t been named of this post) and a couple good Vince Vaughn skits, but I won’t be holding my breathe, yet I still be watching on June 8th like the MTV lapdog that I am. No musical guest announced yet, but you can vote here. Interestingly enough, there are no gender specific categories this year, which means fewer time spent on handing out awards, and that’s always a good thing. Now on to the nominees:


BEST MOVIE






Who Will Win: King Kong
Who I Voted For: Wedding Crashers

This comes down to which group of nerds will spend the most time voting. The comic book nerds will split their vote between Batman and Sin City, but in the end the Peter Jackson nerd will overpower the lives with his parents nerd to win. Too bad there isn’t a write in vote for the Lucas nerd. As the agro-pseudo-frat boy, I went with the dumb comedy. Oddly enough no chick flicks considering MTV is now run by fourteen year old girls.


BEST PERFORMANCE
Joaquin Phoenix -
Jake Gyllenhaal -
Rachel McAdams -
Steve Carell - The 40-Year Old Virgin
Terrence Howard -
Reese Witherspoon - Walk the Line

Who Will Win: Jake Gyllenhall
Who I Voted For: Rachel McAdams

The hardest catergory and weirdest considering Gyllenhall got the nod over Heath Ledger while both Cash’s got one. McAdams is the dark horse because she did sweep the awards last year and her performance here was better than those movies.


BEST COMEDIC PERFORMANCE
Owen Wilson - Wedding Crashers
Adam Sandler -
Steve Carell - The 40-Year Old Virgin
Tyler Perry -
Vince Vaughn - Wedding Crashers

Who Will Win: Steve Carell
Who I Voted For: Vince Vaughn

Sadly Wilson will steal Vaughn’s vote leaving the less funny Carell with the popcorn. Remember when only Sandler or Jim Carey won this award? Ah, the good ol’ days.


BEST ON-SCREEN TEAM
Steve Carell, Paul Rudd, Seth Rogen & Romany Malco - The 40-Year Old Virgin
Johnny Knoxville, Seann William Scott & Jessica Simpson -
Jessica Alba, Ioan Gruffudd, Chris Evans & Michael Chiklis -
Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson & Rupert Grint -
Vince Vaughn & Owen Wilson - Wedding Crashers

Who Will Win: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
Who I Voted For: Wedding Crashers

This category really need to be retired but won’t because it mean more nominations for real actors while better categories like Best Action Sequence and Best CGI Character get dumped.


BEST VILLAIN
Cillian Murphy - Batman Begins
Hayden Christensen -
Ralph Fiennes - Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
Tilda Swinton -
Tobin Bell -

Who Will Win: Tobin Bell
Who I Voted For: Cillian Murphy

They totally got this catergory messed up; they have the right actors, but wrong movies. Fiennes should have gotten the nod for Batman Begins because Murphy’s was basically just a bit role and was much scarier in Red Eye and my vote was more for that movie than Batman. Oh and this category is brought to you by The DaVinci Code. No seriously, it is. Almost as silly as he Neutrogena Best Hero Award


BREAKTHROUGH PERFORMANCE
Andre “3000” Benjamin -
Isla Fisher - Wedding Crashers
Nelly - The Longest Yard
Jennifer Carpenter -
Romany Malco - The 40-Year Old Virgin
Taraji P. Henson - Hustle & Flow

Who Will Win: Andre “3000” Benjamin
Who I Voted For: Isla Fisher

Imagine how worst this category would have been if it was still two gender specific ones. As is, it’s still a toss up between people we will forget about by next year, that if you even know who they are now.


BEST HERO
Christian Bale - Batman Begins
Jessica Alba - Fantastic Four
Daniel Radcliffe - Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
Kate Beckinsale -
Ewan McGregor - Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith

Who Will Win: Christian Bale
Who I Voted For: Ewan McGregor

I still hold an outside theory that people will vote for Jessica Alba solely because she’s Jessica Alba, but Batman will be hard to beat no matter who’s under the mask.


SEXIEST PERFORMANCE
Beyoné Knowles -
Jessica Alba - Sin City
Jessica Simpson - The Dukes of Hazzard
Ziyi Zhang -
Rob Schneider -

Who Will Win: Jessica Alba
Who I Voted For: Jessica Alba

This is basically a no contest. If Alba doesn’t win it meand this is fixed worse than a Don King fight.


BEST FIGHT
Kong vs. the Planes - King Kong
Stephen Chow vs. Axe Gang -
Angelina Jolie vs. Brad Pitt -
Ewan McGregor vs. Hayden Christensen - Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith

Who Will Win: Revenge of the Sith
Who I Voted For: Revenge of the Sith

This is a toss up between Star Wars and Kong, but where Kong has already been done and the lava fight definitely live up to the hype and almost made up for the rest of the sequels.


BEST KISS
Jake Gyllenhaal & Heath Ledger - Brokeback Mountain
Taraji P. Henson & Terrence Howard - Hustle & Flow
Anna Faris & Chris Marquette -
Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt - Mr. & Mrs. Smith
Rosario Dawson & Clive Owen - Sin City

Who Will Win: Mr. & Mrs. Smith
Who I Voted For: Sin City

Nothing like tabloid fodder to help fuel a win, not that there is much competition in this field. The only real composition in here is the gay cowboy movie, but the comic book nerds that tend to rule the voting process probably aren’t that open minded.


BEST FRIGHTENED PERFORMANCE
Rachel Nichols -
Jennifer Carpenter - The Exorcism of Emily Rose
Derek Richardson -
Paris Hilton -
Dakota Fanning -

Who Will Win: Dakota Fanning
Who I Voted For: Rachel Nichols

This is really disturbing as I though Hilton was descending from the pop culture lexicon, yet here she is with an acting nomination. Unless it is for Best Inanimate Object, she should be nominated for anything. And since it’s expected of me, I’ll go ahead and say it, that Hilton girl gives me nightmare. There, happy? Not so coincidentally, I think House of Wax was produced by MTV. Anyways I think Fanning won last year, but I indeed went with the hottest chick here. Where is Rachel McAdams anyways?

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