57 Channels and Only This Is On: 5/14/2017

Once Upon a Time: So did they made the weeding episode a musical just to distract from how basically no one showed up? No Red Riding Hood, no Cinderella, really none of the Disney princesses. The Blue Fairy was in the episode yet did not make an appearance at the ceremony. It was basically just those in the main cast (except Belle and Gold were absent) then the Seven Dwarfs, Granny, and Pinocchio’s father. Even Pinocchio skipped the festivities. But really, this episode made me miss Galavant.
You can download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Billions: For two seasons I thought this show was about a game of cat and mouse. I was wrong, it is about mutual assured destructions. Chuck just lost his trust, lost millions of dollars for his father and childhood friend just to get Axe. Then when they met face to face, Axe said he would spend te times that to make sure Chuck goes down with him just for Chuck to basically respond, so be it. I just hope that season is a trail and not Axe get out from under his prosecution in the first episode and we are back to cat and mouse.

Gotham: Really, Ivy was going to make an army of freaks and all they could come up with is Mr. Fries and Firefly? Sure I enjoy the irony of fire and ice, but c’mon, there seemed to be hundreds of freaks that escaped from Indian Hill.
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

Supergirl: The N’SYNC reference just made me hate this show more. Can it please be promoted back to CBS please?
You can download Supergirl on iTunes.

Harlots: Charlotte may be in custody, but who is going to take the fall for the murder. The obvious answer is her new bot toy, but you know Mrs. Wells will try to get Mrs. Quigley to take the fall.
You can stream Harlots on Hulu.

The Challenge: Invasion of the Champions: Boring finale. But this show does have a format problem where it just loses steam halfway through. It did not help this season the pre-finale episode was just complete filler. They need to speed up the game at that point, not slow it down. Hopefully the six episode special fixes that problem.
You can download The Challenge: Invasion of the Champions on iTunes.

The Americans: Is it just me or was Elizabeth not that into that wedding? But it always has been Phillip who has been more the romantic while she has been more jobs oriented. And that was a rough scene at the end as Paige and her parents read the harsh assessment in Pastor Tim’s diary. Now I wonder if he will make it to his dream job.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: So Adia becomes a real boy and we learned how the Russian survived being crushed by a falling building in that he did not, she just turned him into a robot and mass produced him. Irony? So just how do you kill a former robot who can absorb bullets along with other Inhuman abilities. Chop off her head again?
Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

The Handmaid’s Tale: Interesting that Mrs. Waterford suggested the driver try to impregnate Offred. I guess once pregnant she no longer has to see her husband have sex with another woman. But the she would be raising a kid that is neither hers’ nor her husband. But still creepy she felt she had to stay in the room. At least she did not do the hand holding thing in her lap. And it was a little weird that she went and had sex with a guy who pretty much raped her earlier that day. Maybe that was taking back control. And Rory Gilmore is back. And even though Offred said she knew what happened to her (even though the Commander was vague) I am still not entirely sure. But Rory has got to be sent away after that.

Survivor: Game Changers: I have been watching this show since the beginning so I pick up on a few cues that usually tell you where things are going but they had me fooled twice this week. The second best way to tell if someone is not going home (after winning Immunity obviously) is if their name comes up in the post Immunity Challenge / pre commercial break confessional. So when Michael was talking about should she vote for Sierra or Andrea, the over thinker thought, oh this is a rare target two people situation, maybe Michaela is getting blindsided. Nope, it ended coming down to Sierra and Andrea. And when the votes are read with just two targets, Probst almost always reads just one name first (the one who is not getting voted out first) then the other in succession. Or he alternates back and forth as long as he can. So when he read two Andrea’s in a row after starting out alternating, I thought oh no!!! Andrea is in trouble. Except the rest of the votes ended up being for Sierra. Whew.

But now we are down to eight with only one episode until the finale. That is a lot. Usually only six go to the finale, so what happens next week? A double elimination next week? Will there be a medical elimination? There was no clue in the promo and you would think they would tease either, unless the latter actually happens in the finale. Interesting enough the last time Andrea played (she went out at seven), there was a medical elimination during the finale, even then, just five made that finale.
You can download Survivor: Game Changers on iTunes.

Blindplot: So just what is Sheppard’s end game? She was a soldier (or at least pretend to be) said she did not want to kill anyone at the FBI but would if she did not get the codes (granted she still killed the boss even after saying she would not kill him if anyone gave her the code; but at least after being mostly annoying he went out like a G). I get she is going after some sort of Deep State but I still feel like I am missing something.
You can download Blindspot on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 5/7/2017

Once Upon a Time: Tigerlily is a fairy godmother? What?!?
You can download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Billions: “We didn’t have computers.” God bless Dollar Bill. But usually much of the money stuff goes over my head, but I think I actually followed what happened this week. Well mostly because it in involved old school sabotage with Axe bribing people to get sick on the new product Chuck invested in. But what I do not understand is does Chuck want Axe so bad he was willing to lose his entire trust (along with his father and buddy’s savings too) or does he have a plan for that? Did he know Wendy would bet against him? I am thinking she may go down with Axe on this. I do hope Axe does go down for this and we get a season on his trail because I am not sure if they can continue to do this cat and mouse game between Axe and Chuck for very much longer.

Into the Badlands: I hate dream sequences. The only thing worse than dream sequences are dream sequences with bad Japanese horror rip offs.
You can download Into the Badlands on iTunes.

Gotham: Wasn’t Poison Ivy a sex pot earlier this season? Now she is back to acting like a tn year old. Her scenes were just really weird.
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

Supergirl: Can we please get rid of the lady cop for next season please? She is ruining the show worse than Mon-El.
You can download Supergirl on iTunes.

Harlots: “You always tell mama the truth in the end.” Wait, was that literal? Or was that just an allusion what Mrs. Wells just used to work for her. But poor Lucy, she was just not made for this profession. When does she just run away?
You can stream Harlots on Hulu.

The Challenge: Invasion of the Champions: A two part finale after last week they basically just wasted an hour on nothing? Ugg, I have been waiting for the season to be over for about a month now.
You can download The Challenge: Invasion of the Champions on iTunes.

The Americans: Oh hey, Martha still exists. When they shipped her off to Russia I figured she would have a Nina type storyline but I do not think we have seen her since. And after kicking out Gabriel I wonder if we will ever see her again after this.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: So they just left Mac in the Framework? Um, how about forcing him into the back door? Or just lie to him that his daughter was still alive. If he forgot his daughter was no longer around in the framework, maybe he will not remember anything in the framework when he is out. Won’t he die when they shut down the framework, or is just going to be in a state of animation for the rest of his life?
Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

The Handmaid’s Tale: So now we know the reason behind the creepy Ceremony Night, granted it does not make it any less creepy. Also creepy, how these people do not even let the doctors see the faces of the patients when they treat them. Not that it stopped Donnie from Orphan Black from looking. Always a weido that guy. But what happened to Rory Gilmore? I thought maybe she would be back to great Offred at the end of the episode to great her like before. Is her storyline over or will she be back in her house eventually?

Survivor: Game Changers: Last week a calm came over me when Sierra said it was time for Andrea to go, but nothing is more calming than Andrea actually winning Immunity. Then I can just sit back and enjoy the show. And what a weird show. When they did not show Andrea vote for Zeke, giver her hope to see you never speech a second try, I figure, oh, Sarah won the argument and the six is voting for Sierra. Then Tai got a couple. Then Zeke got a couple. Then Probst told Zeke the tribe had spoken leaving me to wonder just how did that vote go down?

So the six minus Zeke voted for Zeke but the bizarre thing was the four (plus Zeke) voted for each other. Andrea has never gotten her just due, but that was just a masterclass of Survivor. She wins Immunity, gets her alliance to turn on the person who tried to turn on her two episodes ago, and got the opposing alliance to turn on each other.

It will be a shame if Brad, Sierra, Tai, or Troyzan win this season because that was just embarrassing this week; I am talking near ice crème scooper level of bad play. Seriously, you four have three Idols amongst you and at the very least think you know who the other alliance is voting for. If Brad, Sierra, and Troyzan just tell Tai he is being targeted, or Tai tells them he was told to vote for Sierra, they could have figured out how to ply their Idols correctly. I bet Tai would have played his Idol and maybe even given the other to Sierra just in case had they just talked to each other. Now Tai and his Idols may be a free agent for the other alliance. Now if only Andrea can convince Tai to give her one ice crème scooper style.
You can download Survivor: Game Changers on iTunes.

Blindplot: I understand going undercover, but I do not see why not letting the prison staff know what is up. Certainly that would have been beneficial during the breakout.
You can download Blindspot on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 4/30/2017

Once Upon a Time: Um, so what happened to the Tin Man? How about now that the Wicked Witch has drained her magic into that heart you give it to the Tin Man?
You can download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Billions: Oh yeah, Chuck is into kinky stuff. I thought it was finally going to catch up with him but he stole the laptop himself. And syncing up “My hands are tied” to him and Wendy reuniting was a little too on the nose. And I have a feeling Taylor with have a change of conscious before the end of the season.

Gotham: So the Riddler has finally gone full green. Um, yeah? But of course the Penguin did not die, the only question would be how he would return. Um, Poison Ivy fished him out of the river? Alright. I guess maybe they will finally give her something to do.
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

Supergirl: Thank goodness Kara got her job back, blogger just seemed like a horrible cover for a Superhero.
You can download Supergirl on iTunes.

The Voice: I hate Adam, sure Shakira and Gwen are worse coaches but Adam does plenty of head scratching things. One thing he does almost every season and every time he does it it backfires miserably is that he almost always gives a Battle Round pairing a song by the mentor and it always suck. Every time but twice since season four. That is seven times and never has any of these Battles ended in a Steal. So why the fork does he give Lilli Passero a Shania Twain song other than she was the mentor this week? And more importantly, why did he give Lilli that song? Maybe had he given her You’re Still the One or You’ve Got a Way that could have worked with Lilli’s style. Instead Adam’s inner dialogue said, “Lilli’s sassy, this song is sassy… gold!” Seriously I hate Adam. But by some miraculous event, America took pity on Lilli, be it the horrendous song choice or she was rushed to urgent care earlier that week and still seemed out of it after her performance. So hopefully Lilli is back at one hundred percent this week and Adam does not give her a G-Eazy song.

Bates Motel: Wait, what just happened? Did they really kill of Norman Bates well before he was supposed to? I believe in artistic licenses, but it is weird to build this as a prequel to the movie and then kill him before he gets there.
You can download Bates Motel on iTunes.

Harlots: Awesome, the goat is still around. But poor Emily, she just cannot find a place anywhere. But what actually does she do now, start her own house? Then you have Charlotte and her relationship just get weirder by the episode.
You can stream Harlots on Hulu.

The Challenge: Invasion of the Champions: So they finish the Men’s challenge in five minutes, announced these are your finalists, but did not actually start the Final Challenge until about five minutes before the credits. Then in between all we got was fifty minutes of filler. Why not run the final this week instead of wasting my time?
You can download The Challenge: Invasion of the Champions on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Oh snap! Daisy just tossed Aida out that window. Which begs the question; if a robot dies in the framework does it die in the real world? Real world Aida seemed fine after the fall.
Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

The Handmaid’s Tale: So what the fork did they do the Rory Gilmore?!? Is this the gental mutilation I hear from time to time but never bother to read the article to find out exactly what it is? That is the only thing I can think off.
You can stream The Handmaid's Tale on Hulu.

Survivor: Game Changers: When Zeke flipped last week and starting targeting Andrea I got worried she might actually go home. This week when Sierra said it time to get rid of Andrea in the post challenge confessional I had a sense of calm. The season premiere was the five hundredth episode of Survivor and probably of the five hundred and nine episodes in the history of the show, I would venture to guess whoever’s name is mentioned in the pre-commercial confessional does not actually go home. And in the end, Michaela was snacking while Andrea name was read except Debbie’s name was written down more often (really, how big must your stones be to have your name brought up only to have a snack while votes are read; she was sipping away when JT was blindsided too).

Though I am not sure if that was the right move for Sarah. In her old alliance, I would be worried sitting next to Brad or Sierra, but in the new one, I would be worried about everyone except for Michaela. And she may not know this but she just left an alliance with three Hidden Immunity Idols and the Legacy Advantage which make her Stolen Vote thing look worthless. Unless of course the deck shuffles next week. The promo looks like the deck will shuffle with all the females on one side (Sierra does approach Andrea and Cirie) and the male identifiers on the other (Zeke talks to Not-Dante and Troyzan). Of course the dudes may have the advantage despite being out numbered six to four with enough Idols to cover everyone if one of them wins Immunity. Still that would be enough to keep them around for another week and maybe the deck will reshuffle again after that.
You can download Survivor: Game Changers on iTunes.

Previewing The Handmaid's Tale

“Better doesn’t mean better for everyone.” There are many striking things about The Handmaid’s Tale, but this quote sticks out more than them all. In our highly polarized society, it is surprising a politician has not come right out and said this while defending legislation like health care where there seems to be no good law that helps everyone in a fiscal way. Of course if any politician said that it would probably be a good way to not get reelected.

But that is a thing you can say in a totalitarian regime that is in control of the alternative timeline of The Handmaid’s Tale. It is a little unclear how he got here but flashbacks slowly put the puzzle pieces in place. At first this regime slaughtered Congress, blamed terrorists, and suspended the constitution temporary until it became permanent. Anchorage is now the capital and there are only two states left while there is still war going outside.

This unrest all started with a plague of infertility over the majority of women and much like the Biblical plagues, some religious types thought this was brought on by God punishing us for birth control and other immoral acts. And now this new world is being run by the Leaders of the Faithful who make the Westboro Baptist Church look like Sodom and Gomorrah in comparison. The abduct fertile women and turn them into sex slaves for Commanders whose wives cannot give birth resulting in maybe the creepiest sex scene you will ever see. But yet aside from being devotedly religious, these people seem to forget one of the Ten Commandments is Thou Shall Not Kill. And the whole thing about coveting your neighbor’s wife is mostly of broken by them too.

Elisabeth Moss (Mad Men) plays the titular character and narrator who is taken prisoner because she had just given birth so the Leaders of the Faithful know she is fertile. It is a little weird seeing Peggy Olsen in modern time except she is quickly outfitted in a handmaid’s garb which looks straight out of the Puritan’s collection, a muted red floor length dress with a “winged” white hat. The Leaders on the other hand are always dressed like they are heading to the opera. Moss’s Leaders are played by Joseph Fiennes (FlashForward), who utters that first line, and Yvonne Strahovski (Chuck) who is really good in this Stepfordian role.

But it is Moss who is great here. She always seems to have this dead behind the eyes stares as the life has been almost completely sucked out of her in the two short months she has been a Handmaid. And the camera always seems to be in a close up shot of that black stare. Juxtaposed her creepy blank stare to her very lively narration where she plots a way to get back to her son. Alexis Bledel (Sin City) shows up as a fellow Handmaid, they are not allowed to travel by themselves, with a secret which gets very dark by the third episode.

And just when the show starts getting too dark, there are moments of levity, a quick quip from Moss as narrator, a random game of Scrabble, and most notably a weird and random musical cue that closes out the second episode. Really, the weirder the show gets the more I enjoy it. It has been a rough start for Hulu since it has flipped over to their pay only tier, but The Handmaid’s Tale is finally a new show worth paying for their service.

The first three episodes of The Handmaid’s Tale are now able to stream on Hulu with new episodes premiering every Wednesday.