57 Channels and Only This Is On: 4/19/15

Once Upon a Time: Oh yeah, I forgot Robin Hood was out there somewhere. I also forgot just how boring he is. Maybe the show can turn him into a wolf or something.

Mad Men: Weird that Betty and company showed up in the first scene and were not seen again after that. I audibly groaned when I saw them thinking we were going to have to sit through another boring Betty story line. Instead we got the loathsome Harry who managed to to creep on Megan before the ink on the divorcee papers was even dry, or technically before there was any ink on them at all. Overall a pretty meh episode even if we mostly avoided the Francis clan, it definitely needed more Ken.
You can download Mad Men on iTunes.

Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Holy Billy Riggins sighting! But why are they wasting his talents on just knocking on the door to a bathroom? He did not even get to run into his sister-in-law. Oh well. So we finally learned how May get her title of The Calvary before taking a desk job until Coulson brought her back into the field. Fine, whatever, But maybe the most interesting part of SHIELD this week was Clarke Gregg Skyping into Jimmy Kimmel Live during a fan Q and A segment to ask any of the Avengers if they ever thought about working on the small screen which was met by deafening silence by the six movie stars. Ouch. Guess none of The Avengers will learn Coulson is not so dead anytime soon.
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Justified: For the third time in the series history, the finale episode featured the song No One Gets Out of Harlan Alive. This turned out to be one big red herring because everyone who has been around from the first season was able to get out of Harlan with their heart still beating: Raylan, Boyd, Ava, even Wynn Duffy moved to an undisclosed location presumably to to door to door dog grooming.

Not that it was a satisfying ending. Raylan got in a few more great zingers, the best being, "Try this one" as he kicked a gun to Boyd after admitting he was out of bullets. Then Raylan did get his one last showdown with Boone that even though you knew was coming the moment he stepped on screen did not make it any less epic. Raylan is actually losing his touch because he actually let Boone get a shot off.

As it seems to becoming standard for television shows, we got a "four years later" coda, most surprising being that Raylan did not get the girl (whatever did happen to Jackie Nevada), Ava had a chid of her own and we finally learn why Boyd and Raylan just could not kill each other: they were brothers in arms who just took different paths, and they managed to help each other get out of Harlan alive.

All that is left now is figuring out where the show lands in the Pantheon of all time great television shows. I am ready to call it the best of the first half of this decade. As for all time, the show boasts the all time greatest opening of all time (Raylan giving the crime boss twenty-four hours to leave town and the time is up), one of the greatest antagonist of all time in Mags Bennett (sorry Boyd). Really only two demerits: the drag of the Michael Rappaport season and the flimsy heal turn by Ava, shaking up with her brother-in-law who was more evil than the man she killed. Still, if there were a Television Hall of Fame, you could make an easy argument for Justified in five years.
You can download Justified on iTunes.


Survivor: Blue Collar vs. White Collar. vs. No Collar: I liked how Probst refused to verify the validity of the Hidden Immunity Idol for Mike. Fake Idols are not made on this show enough anymore. Other that, a pretty boring episode as we are in the long decimation of the smaller alliance post merge that happens most seasons. They should really double up those eliminations into one episode when that happens to speed things up. Hopefully the promo for next week was not a red herring and that Mike and the Masshole go after each other (which hopefully results in the Masshole's elimination).
You can download Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar on iTunes.

The American's: When Martha found out Clark was not who he said he was I thought, well he has to kill her now. With her cracking and about to go home I thought, oh yeah, Clark is taking off his wig so Martha knows exactly who he is before he kills her. Except the episode just faded to black. But she cannot possibly survive the season. And with the season finale next week, someone has to finally take the fall for the bugged pen. Martha death making it look like a suicide because of guilt over betraying her country but I still think Stan may actually going to get caught trying to free Nina that he gets fingered.
The Americans on iTunes.

Nashville: Juliet's irrational post pregnancy moods is really the most entertaining she has ever been.
You can download Nashville on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 4/4/15

Once Upon a Time: I remember back when we saw Emma's back story saying that it was surprising that her friend did not turn out to be a fairy tale character. Well, it turned out she was in fact from the fairy tale world and apparently Malificant's daughter. Except wasn't Lily Hispanic? Or was I thinking of someone else?
You can Download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Shameless: Even though I thought it was the case, I still laughed at the end when Sammi started banging on the storage bin revealing she was not so dead. I do wonder if that is the last we see of her, it does seem like that character has run her course and this show has no problem getting rid of characters they do not know what to do with anymore.

The Walking Dead: During the final commercial break I was thinking, are they really not going to kill anybody off in the season finale. Sure Glenn somehow made it out of the zombie dog pile, Daryl somehow was saved by one dude as about a hundred zombies surrounded his car (no one thought of at least trying to hot wire it). Things got even more surprising when Glenn and his nemesis and Sasha and the Reverend were all seen in some weird friendship montage. Of course that was all red herrings for the finale when the evil doctor stabbed the politician's husband who gave Rick the okay to kill him right in front of his old friend Morgan who just got done telling Daryl "Every life is precious." There has been a lot of discussion this season about how Rick has morphed into Shane. Does that make Morgan the season one version of Rick to Rick's Shane? We will have to wait until fall to find out but first up we get to see how the outbreak broke out with Fear the Walking Dead this summer! Starring Matt Saresen's mom!! Hopefully that show does not take four to five seasons to get good.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Revenge: So Courtney Love pops up in one scene as a hit man who services will not be needed? Alrighty, I have a feeling this will not be her only appearance. Does she still go after Emily Amanda or go after Margot for knowing her identity? This is just getting too silly, hopefully this is the end of the show, just let Courtney Love and Louise kill them all.
You can download Revenge on iTunes.

Marvel's Agent's of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Finally a showdown between Bobbie and May, and it certainly lived up to expectations. But the feuding SHIELDs is a little silly, you are both on the same side, there is no need to act so covertly against each other.
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Justified: Rarely is there is a scene that is extremely shocking but Mikey Michael strangling Katherine to death while she keeps shooting him had my jaw dropped for a couple minutes.
You can download Justified on iTunes.

Survivor: Wow, an Immunity Idol actually worked I cannot remember the last time that happened. Not that it matters much if it stays six versus four. I am surprised the White Collar went with the Blue Collar who is full five, why not go with the easier No Collar tribe?
You can download Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar on iTunes.

The Americans: Finally Paige learned who her parents were after teasing that she was on to them way back in the first season finale. Of course right went something interesting was about to happen when CIA Agent Stan showed up to diner, the episode ended. Meanwhile Henry got more lines this week than in his entire run of the series to date.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 3/29/15

Once Upon a Time: So if the good guys are going to pick off Mr. Gold's cabal one by one with kindness, does this mean they are going to give Cruella Dr. Hopper's Dalmatian as an appeasement to her at some point?
You can Download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Shameless: Oh no, Sammy called the Army to report Ian. Which begs the question how did it take a tip from someone to catch him, Ian was hiding in his own home? I wonder if he will get a bunk with his brother.

The Walking Dead: Oh snap, I just figured that the old group would just blindly follow Rick with his overthrow of Alexandria but it did not cross my mind that any of them would actually want to assimilate which apparently Michone does. If Rick is exiled like I assume I wonder who goes with him. Of course they will be back just as Rick warned Deanna that anyone exile will be back. Sure the middle episodes were a bit of a drag but no one does season premieres / finales like this show and next week should be explosive. Plus we still have the person that is marking walker foreheads with a Scarlet A.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Revenge: So a taxi to happened to plow Margot over in the fire lane? Seems fishing, nothing is that coincidental on this show. I wonder if her henchman had anything to do with it, with or without Margo's knowledge, because he seemed a little to overeager not to give up the fight.
You can download Revenge on iTunes.

Bates Motel: So Norman did not kill the token hot chick like I feared, but she still ended up dead. Meh.
You can download Bates Motel on iTunes.

Pretty Little Liars: I have long predicted a not so dead Mona would turn out to Be A, well at least I was half right. When her name flashed up under the guest star list I then assumed a not so dead Alison's mother was going to be A after realizing it was not Mona. Completely wrong at that. We learned that Charles is actually A and by the home movie that do make it seem like Charles is Jason's twin brother that apparently no one knew existed. If so, where has he been all this time? Did the Dilarentas family have him hidden in that bunker this whole time?
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Marvel's Agent of SHIELD: So the "Real SHIELD" does not trust Coulson and his alien DNA, that actually seems reasonable. They could have spent the whole episode in that conference room explaining stuff I would not have minded because I could not care less about Ward and Agent 33 (but it did give us some decent comedy with Talbott ruining his marriage and basically sexually harassing his female underlings).
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Justified: One of the main problems with this season was that you knew that Raylan was not going to catch Boyd until the series finale but much like season four where they actually caught Drew Thompson a couple episodes prior to the finale and then ending up have its best episodes of the season after that, Raylan actually caught Boyd redhanded with a couple episodes left. It looks like we may get the trial Tim was hoping for. Though since the CI shot him, I wonder if a RICO case will stick.
You can download Justified on iTunes.

The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II: Congratulations to Sarah and Jordan. And since you won, you can both retire because I really have no desire to see either back on the show. And take Jay and Jenna with you because they do not deserve another invite after quitting (though it is odd the other challenges had a thirty minute time limit but the drinking one). Pure rookie moves, first they do not look at LeRoy's answer and then they actually tried drinking the fish oil while Sarah and Teresa clearly poured half of it down their faces and then spit out the rest while pretending to puke.
You can download The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II on iTunes.

Survivor: Blue Collar vs. White Collar vs. No Collar: Morons, Survivor 101 states you never, under any circumstance: throw a challenge. The only time anyone threw a challenge and actually ended up winning was when in Fans vs. Favorites they did not even bother to compete just to get rid of Brandon Hantz. Every other time a team that has thrown a challenge, no one involved ever won that season. It is weird to think after how bad their tribe was, No Collar may actually be in the drivers seat. Blue Collar is in disarray, White Collar lost two members after the tribe swap, if smart the No Collar could easily decimate everyone, but are they smart enough to do that now that the merge is immanent?
You can download Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar on iTunes.

The Americans: Could Stan actually take the fall for the bug in the pen? If someone catches him working with Oleg he would have to move to the top of the suspect list for the FBI. But I have a feeling the black dude will end up being that fall guy.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

The Blacklist: Wait, did they just out Lizzie as being pregnant? Tom having an ultrasound in his pocket pretty much confirms it. Red is going to be very disappointed.
You can download The Blacklist on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 3/22/15

Shameless: I was hoping for a Carl / Chucky juvenile spinoff but it looks like we will be getting that on the main show with both being sentenced to hard time. Of course Chucky ended up with the white supremacists while Carl ended up with the hood gang. Elsewhere I really liked the doctor story line, I just wonder how long it will last. On one hand, Frank needs a place to stay, on the other, the last time he took care of a dying women in hopes of being left her estate did not work out very well for him. But then again, nothing really works out for him except for his inability to stay dead.

The Walking Dead: A couple weeks ago I floated out the theory that it was not Rick and company who should be weary of the residents of Alexandria because they always run into evil doers, it should be Alexandria that should be hesitant of the new group. It looks like I am not the only one as the reverend also voiced his concern over Rick. With the death of the congresswoman's son, I am guessing the coup will be coming next week (or at the very least in two weeks for the finale).And poor young Chris Rock, but how do you let one person out power two in the revolving door? And speaking of those two deaths, the camera really lingered way too long on those death scenes.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Bates Motel: So Norman maybe killed the token hot chick already? Bummer. But that was not her in the lake was it, it looked more like a dude, I first thought that was the creepy neighbor.
You can download Bates Motel on iTunes

Community: About a decade ago Arrested Development did everything it could to get a fourth season, they even slipped some in jokes about hoping to being picked up by HBO or Showtime into episodes. But alas, the show could not find a new home. Five years later, DirecTV saved Damages from cancellation opening up a flood gate an now five short years after that no beloved or cult television show is allowed to died because there are so many channels, band streaming sites looking for content. Even horrible shows that everyone hates like The Killing somehow manages a reprieve. Seven years later Arrested Development finally got its fourth season. So it is clear we are now living in an era when no media property will die as long as everyone involved wants it to live on (sorry Friday Night Lights fans, Kyle Chandler has no interest in reviving the series, probably for the best).

So when Community finally got the ax from NBC, the was little question on if it would get its prophetized six seasons a movie, the question would be where would it land. Hulu passed and surprisingly Yahoo! wanted to get in the streaming game. Even more surprising is that the show is basically commercial free and free to watch. I watched the first two episode and they only aired on ad before the first one. As for the content itself, it is still Community even though it is down yet another cast member (Shirley escaped to CBS multicam hell), it did not even relish in the lack of network standards and practices. Like always it is somewhat enjoyable but I really hope that this is it, well plus a movie. But even if this is it, it will probably be revived again in five years or so.
You can watch Community on Yahoo Screen.

Pretty Little Liars: I have been out on this show for a season or two now, but this episode finally pulled me back in with the characters acting like idiots (passing notes in jail with the lawyer calling them out for it; Aria's brother leaving the car after getting hit with an arrow... stay in the car and keep driving you moron, do not leave the car where there is not a windshield to protect you) and other characters just doing things for no apparent reason (Calab just sitting in the dark at the cabin) and a big plot twist: Alison gets convicted followed directly by all the Liars getting arrested. If only they had gone to the police after the first text. An let me predict one more time, a not so dead Mona will turn out to be the next A that will be revealed next week.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Marvel's Agents of SHIELD: So the big secret Bobbi and Mack have is they are covert operatives for "the real SHIELD." Alrighty. At least they only drug that secret out two episode. Granted if Edward James Olmos is involved, maybe it is the real SHIELD. And let me guess, he is going to want to lock Skye up but over Colson's dead body.
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes

Justified: If you are dumb enough not to assume the evil crime boss lady does not keep a gun in her purse, you definitely deserve to die. The Ava finally tipped her hand and went with Raylan this week, unfortunately for her, Boyd did not get caught red handed as he did not make it through the bottom of the floor. Yeah, it probably was not the best idea to trust the crazy explosion expert.
You can download Justified on iTunes.

The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II: So Sarah has had two of her partners leave prematurely and was sent home too as a result; Leroy had two of his sent home and both times got a replacement partner. This time he got an upgrade right before the finale. Lucky boy. Why not just hand him the prize right then and there (well probably because Sarah ends up winning anyway). But the best part of the show was the After Show with Banana's saying he would never sell out a friend / cut to him selling out Paula. Did he forget all of this was on tape?
You can download The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II on iTunes.

Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar: Ask and you shall receive, just last week I was complaining about no Reward Challenges and we get two this week. The show flows a lot better with two challenges per episode. Then we had a Tribe Swap which could not have ended better for Blue Collar, a majority on one tribe and a swing vote on the other. Bearded dude brought up it ended up like the swap back in One World but it was also divided by strength back in the Fans vs. Favorites II season also. Maybe it is fixed.
You can download Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar on iTunes.

The Americans: Wait, is Martha really going to forgive Clark? Even more surprising, how does Clark kill Martha just in case?
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

The Blacklist: Wait, so they just let Tom walk after confessing to killing harbor master just to keep Lizzy out of jail even though the AG guy could have made the whole thing go away anyway? Maybe Tom should have been taken to a black site. I really hope he does not end up joining the team somewhere down the road.
You can download The Blacklist on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 3/15/15

Once Upon a Time: So Snow White had something to do with Malicifant losing her baby and she had something to do with Cora's death... are we sure he is really pure at heart?
You can download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Shameless: Considering all the horrible things Frank has done, I am not sure this tops the list, but getting your grandson arrested by selling out your son at the same time is pretty high on the list. I have long advocated for a Justified spinoff starring Dewey and Dicky in prison, but a Shameless spinoff with Chucky and Uncle Carl in prison may just be as entertaining.

House of Lies: As soon as Clyde hooked up with Kelsey after Doug got there first last week my first thought was, oh no, we are going to have to sit though a threesome of them. Kelsey quickly brought it up shortly afterwards, joking or not, but I really fear they will go through with it. You know Doug will have no qualms about it, no will Clyde just talk himself into it.

Revenge: So the chick from Firefly is Victoria's ex-mother-in-law... What? It is really time for this show to end.
You can download Revenge on iTunes.

The Returned: As I teased in my preview, the sisters turning out be twins was extremely freaky. Twins are kind of freaky on their own but this takes it to another level. And to tease upcoming episodes, their twin connection get only more freaky in upcoming episodes. I did not get to bring it up in the preview, so just let me now point out just how wrong having sex with a "psychic" to connect with your daughter is. And if you are a fake physic, why add they sex part to it?
You can download The Returned on iTunes.

Pretty Little Liars: I was expecting the trial to be a little more explosive than that. Sure it came out that Mama Marrin hooked up with Jason and the prosecutor theorized that Alison was never kidnapped without any actual proof. Hopefully they are much more fireworks in the season finale which promises another "A" reveal which I think with be the fifth in the show's history. Let me go and predict a not so dead Mona is pulling the strings.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Marvel's Agents of SHIELD: If ABC decides not to bring Agent Carter back, they should definitely go with a Lady Sif spin-off for a mid season filler for SHIELD. Or even better, cut SHIELD to ten episodes, then ten of Agent Carter and Lad Sif.
You can download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes

Switched at Birth: Whoa, Bay, of course Emmett is going to break up with you when you go all crazy girlfriend on him, interrupting his movie not once but twice. But very smooth for Emmett to pull they maybe we can hook back up after college if I cannot find anything better while I am here ploy. Has that actually ever worked for anyone?
You can download Switched At Birth on iTunes.

Justified: What a weird ending to the episode as Raylan gets Shakespearean with his father in his old hiding space which turned out to be as empty as Al Capone's vault. Just a weird departure for a show with about a month left before going off the air.
You can download Justified on iTunes.

The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II: At the beginning of the season TJ asked Nany which of the guys was going to be her partner and she mentioned it could have well been half of them. For the inevitable next Rivals season, there are just as many possibilities and it looks like you can add Nia and Sarah to that list. Of course Sarah made the right decision, you eliminate a strong team right before the finals. If Bananas or Leroy think they deserve to be in the finals, they should have won the last challenge, and they definitely should not have lost it.
You can download The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II on iTunes.

Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar: zit seems like I say this every season, but the show really needs to bring back the Reward Challenge, with only one challenge per episode we get way too much filler, like watching monkeys having sex.
You can download Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar on iTunes.

Hindsight: So Lolly, who was okay with Becca hooking up Kevin, now thinks its is an unforgivable act because a Lolly in another timeline shunned future Becca for it. Chicks, man, chicks. What a depressing way to end a season, Becca pretty much screwed everything up, her future husband ended up marrying someone else, her brother, and possibly father, are going to jail, she ruined her friendship with Lolly a whole decade earlier. Really, they only one whose life improved was her ex-husband who managed to sell some paintings. Then the ending was pretty vague, clearly she went into the elevator hoping to be transported back to current day. The musical cue of Numb would have us to believe that there was some time traveling involving involved but I would be surprised if she ends up back in 2015. Of course I would be more surprised if there is a second two. But if there is I would guess Becca wakes up in a different year, maybe 2005. The Killers! Jack Johnson!! Gorillaz!!! A sane Kanye West!!!! Sure I'd watch that.
You can download Hindsight on iTunes.

The Americans: This is beginning to be one of those show where the promos are more entertaining than the actual show. Last week they made it seem like Martha was going to confront Clarke, this week she realized that the spying equipment was inadvertently brought in by her, but she never ended up confronting Clarke about it. And wasn't Paige supposed to confront her parents this week? Are they really going to drag this out for the rest of the season?
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

The Blacklist: Odd to have a glorified clip show at this point in the second season. And did we really learn that it was Red who hired Tom to get close to Lizzy instead of Berlin like we were told earlier? I guess that is why that interaction they had before Tom disappeared was weird.
You can download The Blacklist on iTunes.

King of the Nerds: Finally, at long last, gender equality has become a reality now that a dude has actually been crowned King of the Nerds for the very first time. I was rooting for Kaitlyn, but it is hard to justify having a King of the Nerds be someone who works with NASA and cannot get a sun question right that even I guessed correctly.
You can download King of the Nerds on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 3/1/15

The Walking Dead: The biggest problem with the show is that the show is predicated on the character being completely stupid for it to be any good. The smart thing to do in a zombie apocalypse would be to join up with as many living people as possible to beat back the zombie hoards. The smart thing to do back in season one would have been to join forces with the nursing home people, but had they done that, that show would have been extremely boring. So our protagonists are stupid. Which leads us to this week. The smart thing would have been to jump in the camper and ride up to Alexandra and enjoy all the homemade applesauce they would let someone else force down their throats. Instead we get an entire episode of Rick being paranoid when the alternative is that his group starves to death. Of course Rick has every reason to be cautious because the homosexuals will obviously turn out to be evil like every other group they have run into since they opted out of the nursing home: The Governor was a megalomaniac, Terminus was full of cannibals, even the cops in the hospital were basically using slave labor. Now the only question is what demented thing are these Alexandrians in to. Well, besides forcing their children to eat applesauce against their will. That is the evil cult I want to run into when their is a zombie apocalypse.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Gotham: After The Dark Knight trilogy I was hoping for a little more lighthearted Batman adaptation as a follow up. I was not expecting The Brave and the Bold or even Adam West type cheesy fun. If Man of Steel was any indication, Batfleck will be as dour as Christian Bale and the show is not much cheerier. That is why I liked all the silly comedy associated with the Red Hood this week. Unfortunately the mail characters went to darker places this week with Alfred getting stabbed and, oh goodness, why did Fish scoop out her own eye and step on it? When she said their was a option C, how did that be the only thing that crossed her mind? Fish Mooney has quickly moved into Brody territory of why did they not kill them off much earlier then they actually did? Really she is only behind Brody and Otto from Sons of Anarchy (who also lost and eye and was into self mutilation) on that list right now.
You can download Gotham on iTunes.

Marvel's Agent Carter: It has become Marvel tradition that the final scene is dedicated to some big plot twist or recognizable star making an appearance. I figured that scene for the season finale of Agent Carter would be dedicate to her being the first S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. Nope, they went with the more shocking route with the dude from Captain America lurking in the shadows. That will be a formidable big bad team for a potential season two. Instead of waiting until next winter, how about another eight week season this summer?
You can download Marvel's Agent Carter om iTunes.

Justified: Poor Choo-Choo, it did not quite have the Of Mice and Men ending as it teased, but still sad. I thought maybe he would make it when the train stopped but alas, it looks like he is gone. And the plot twist just kept coming, it is clear the Lawnmower Man set up for Boyd to go down that hole, but why? And why exactly did Limehouse sell out Ava?
You can download Justified on iTunes.

The Challenge: Battle of the Exes: Stupid promo monkeys. From the very introduction of Ex-ile in the first episode, we have heard Sarah say, "This changes evvvvvvverything" and they play her saying that basically every week, or very least on every episode. So it was pretty clear she and Jordan would still be around by the time TJ announces the twist to the unsuspecting competitors still around. This lead to little drama in the dome as it was clear Sarah would be back. Speaking of spoilers, the promo for next week really looked like Nany's ponytail making their return inevitable (of course if the show were scripted, then Nany and Bananas would obviously be the ones chosen to get back in the game). But they do have to go through the behemoth that is Zach, but since he just lost a strength based dome, it is very possible.
You can download The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II on iTunes.

Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar: The show is at its best whenever it divides its tribe along specific attributes, well except the age season, that one not surprisingly turned out bad. And the show needs a good season after the disastrous last season when it became how flawed Blood vs. Water was. No one really stuck out as someone to root for, I kind of want to do that for the "hearing advocate" (hey, it is better than coconut vendor and this is the No Collar tribe) but the promo monkeys make it look like she is not long for this game.

One thing that really stuck out to me is how much this season resembles Brains vs. Brawn vs. Beauty. White Collar are the Brain, Blue Collar are the Brawn, an though they are not all that attractive, No Collar do share some attributes of the Beauty tribe. And just like the previous season, the White Collar are trying way too hard to outsmart each other early like the Brains tribe did. You just cannot take the deceit that early in the game and if you do, you better come up with a better excuse then what they did. Poor So, pretty much was voted out because of it.

Except that was a really dumb play on the White Collar tribe. The move was to vote out Carolyn, first off she seems really annoying, is old, and most importantly has the Hidden Immunity Idol. The two swing guys should had targeted her, if she does not play the Idol, a weak and annoying player is gone; if she does play it, oh well, So goes home and the Idol is flushed out.

Since I see this season playing out like Brains vs. Brawn, vs. Beauty, that means a White Collar will not win because they will try to out think each other, eventually playing themselves out of the game; the No Collar will turn on each other early and often (that love triangle cannot possibly end well); so that mean a Blue Collar wins. I just hope that the Masshole does not turn out to be this season's Tony, so I will predict Mike as the winner.
You can download Survivor: White Collar vs. Blue Collar vs. No Collar on iTunes.

Hindsight: I thought the music supervisor really screwed up when Vanessa Carlton started playing at the beginning of the episode. But they threw a curve and eventually let us know they flashbacked (or forward depending how you look at it) to 2003. Lolly's normal looking hair should have been the hint at the time. Granted later in the episode during the 2003 timeline they did use the nineties Sarah McLachlan classic, so the music survivor did much that up a little.
You can download Hindsight on iTunes.

The Americans: It seems like Philip has ninety-nine problems, and they are all (expletive delete). Two wives and two fifteen year old's. The Jennings have done some pretty morally corrupt acts on the show, but seducing a fifteen year old have to be number one.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

Nashville: It seems like every week things go from bad to worse for Layla, but shockingly something went her way this week getting signed by Rayna (off of a kind of crappy song, but alas). But then it looks like she already sabotaged that relationship but hiring Rayna's archnemesis Jeff as her manager. Bad move Layla.
You can download Nashville on iTunes.

King of the Nerds: Well that was disappointing. I was kind of hoping that the secret six five alliance would make the wrong decision and Colby would send another one of them home. Oh well.
You can download King of the Nerds on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 2/8/15

Super Bowl: I refuse to recognize cheaters as winners because cheaters should never win and winners do not cheat. And lets be honest, the true winners of the Super Bowl was the Green Bay Packers. Seriously, very few people can outshine one of the greatest living humans Anna Kendrick in her own movie trailer. I am definitely not ready for Clay Matthews's jelly, but I cannot wait to see the full performance.


Shameless: Did someone forget to tell Showtime that the Super Bowl was on? And it ended up being the best episode of the short season so far and one of the best of the series. But I guess in the age of DVR and On Demand, I guess watching the first run episode does not really matter much for premium channels who are not selling ads. As long as the viewers watch sometime. But anyway. What a great episode for Frank in his warped The Hangover type plot of trying to figure out what happened to his insurance money. That final reveal with the prosthetics my have been the most "shameless" scene in the show's history. Now with Sheila gone and his money gone, it looks like Frank is back to square one. Does he move in with Sammi at this point?

Pretty Little Liars: Rosewood really has a never ending well of absurdly attractive lesbians. But can they bring back Mona already? The show is kind of boring without her. Because much like Allison, I just do not believe Mona is dead. Hopefully it does not take Mona four years to pop back up in town.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Agent Carter: As entertaining as the show has been it is disappointing that could not figure out how to make use of Dum Dum Duggan more often. Maybe if their is a season two, maybe Peggy can take up his offer of joining the Howling Commandos for next season.
You can download Marvel's Agent Carter om iTunes.

Switched at Birth: I cannot comment on this episode because I will undoubtedly offend people with my thoughts.
You can download Switched At Birth on iTunes.

Justified: I could not believe they killed of Dewie Crowe in the season premiere (that really puts a crimp into my Dewie / Dickie spin-off) but Choo Choo may end up being an almost worthy substitute. But that mask scene just showed that Raylan is still the best character on television.
You can download Justified on iTunes.

The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II: What a gutwrenching elimination, on one hand Johnny Bananas wore out his welcome five to ten seasons ago, on the other, Nana has quickly closing in on GOAT status. At least they have that silly ex-ile twist this season (is this the first time The Challenge stole something from Survivor? And now that I think about it, if The Challenge now allows Are You the One castmates, how about recruiting Survivor contestants too). If the show is scripted there is no doubt those two are the ones that make it back into the game. The stupid web show may end up being more entertaining than the actual show.
You can download The Challenge: Battle of the Exes II on iTunes.

Hindsight: Why was Becca telling the college students how great the next R.E.M. album is? Would that not be New Adventures In Hi-Fi? C'mon Becca, it is one thing to spoil the future, but is another to give people false hope of the future. But she made up for it with a great use of Nightswimming at the of episode, one of my favorite songs ever recorded.
You can download Hindsight on iTunes.

The Americans: Sure, this is still one of the best shows on television, but something needs to happen. The show is still living off close calls every couple episodes, be it the CIA almost catching the Jennings, or Paige discovering what her parents do, but they still have not pulled the trigger on either. Interesting that NBC already beat The Americans to the punch on the second point creating a show where Russians spies tell their son about themselves (or so the previews would have me believe, I did not bother to watch Intelligence). Really the best part of this season so far was the one aspect of the show that chance: Nina in Russian prison. Why did they hold that storyline out of the premiere? Well, the second best, Stan telling Olag that if he if going to shoot him, he will have to shoot him in the back. What a "G" move.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

The Blacklist: Usually I prefer more serialized moments of television shows, but I really do not care at all about the fire Lizzie was in as a kid. And the more they talk about it, the more confused I get. So now her dad (or who she thought was her dad because it is still very plausible that Red is really her father) died in that fire. But did he not die last season when Red smothered him with a pillow? Meh, just give me the Blacklister of the week for this show. I do not care at all with the backstory.
You can download The Blacklist on iTunes.

King of the Nerds: One thing I noticed this week is there is copious amounts of cleavage this season. In previous season the girls wore a lot of t-shirts with nerd slogans on them, but there are a lot of tank tops this time around. Between that and all the partial lesbians running around it is clear the boys do not have a chance of winning yet again this season. But at least the challenges are silly as ever. Why was there a sumo wrestler in the Nerd Off? Who knows, but it was entertaining.
You can download King of the Nerds on iTunes.

The Ten Best Television Shows of 2013-14

For my list of best shows of the year, I only consider shows that air a majority of their episodes during the past year so I did not consider the most recent season of Mad Men which stupidly was split into half season with the remaining episodes not airing until spring of 2015. Here are the ten best shows that aired their episodes in the same twelve month periods.

1. Hannibal, Season 2 (NBC)

2. Justified, Season 5 (FX)

3. Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey (FOX)

4. Masters of Sex, Season 1 (Showtime)

5. The Blacklist, Season 1 (NBC)

6. Orphan Black, Season 2 (BBC America)

7. The Americans, Season 2 (FX)

8. Penny Dreadful, Season 1 (Showtime)

9. Parenthood, Season 5 (NBC)

10. Sons of Anarchy, Season 6 (FX)


And for fun, here are the shows that had the most Quotes and Songs of the Week from the past year.

Quotes of the Week:
Justified – 8
The Bridge – 6
Mad Men – 5
Homeland – 4
Shameless – 3
The Big Bang Theory – 2
Masters of Sex – 2
Once Upon a Time – 2
Orphan Black – 2
Penny Dreadful – 2
Pretty Little Liars – 2
Survivor – 2
The Challenge – 1
Community - 1
How I Met Your Mother – 1
King of the Nerds – 1
Nashville – 1
NFL Draft – 1
The Neighbors – 1
Ray Donovan – 1
The Sing-Off – 1
Tyrant – 1
Under the Dome – 1

Songs of the Week:
How I Met Your Mother – 6
Pretty Little Liars – 5
The Goldbergs – 4
The Americans – 3
Nashville – 3
Ray Donovan – 3
The Blacklist – 2
Growing Up Fisher – 2
Orphan Black - 2
Revenge – 2
Suburgatory – 3
The Big Bang Theory – 1
The Bridge – 1
Californication – 1
The Colbert Report – 1
Community - 1
Crisis – 1
Dominion – 1
House of Lies – 1
Mad Men – 1
Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. – 1
The Millers – 1
Perception – 1
Sons of Anarchy – 1
Tyrant – 1

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 5/25/14

Mad Men: After Pete missed her twice, I was beginning to fear that we not get to see Trudy this episode and after Community got canceled, I need my Alison Brie fix anyway I can get it. I even sit through her vodka ads. But anyway. Every since Bob Benson creepily touched Pete’s thigh, people questioned his sexuality and this week we got a definitive answer as to just how he swings, going as far as to ask Joan to be his beard. Poor Joan, actually thinks she can still find love as a single mother pushing forty. Her best, and probably only hope is her baby-daddy Roger who has the maturity level of his kid.
You can download Mad Men on iTunes.

Penny Dreadful: I was beginning to think the second episode was going to enter into a sophomore episode slump after a fairly uneventful first half of the episode (consumption sex notwithstanding). But things really picked up in the second half. The séance scene was more disturbing than anything on The Walking Dead while the first Frankenstein Monster reintroducing itself to his father was just as creepy. Still the second episode felt more like an extension of the Pilot where we are introduced to two or three main characters. Now that we have met all the players, hopefully the show starts to pick up next week.

The Voice: I checked into the finale for a couple minutes and quickly realized that I wisely checked out somewhere between the first and second Battle Rounds. Somehow they found singers more boring and bland than last season’s final three in Christina and Jake. At least Josh won, though I not sure if he could have even sniffed the semi-finals in the first four seasons. This is usually where I make a long list of ways to fix the show, but I have only one right now: find better talent. I thought season four was pretty weak talent wise compared to the first three and the last two have gotten significantly worse talent wise. It is time to bring in more ringers. And good ones, not silly YouTube “superstars,” ones with actual talent and entertainment value.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu.

Survivor: Cagayan: Sometime I just have to scratch my head at how some people vote. After three jury members attacked Tony for lying after swearing on his badge, wife and kid, and even his death father’s grave, I actually though Woo had a chance of winning, yet all three of those players ended up voting for Tony. I do not mind lying and cheating to advance in the game, but who gives a million dollars to someone who reigns on the memory of their dead father? What’s worse is that Tony did not even gain anything from voting for Trish. Ugg, so after such a promising premise, Brains vs. Beauty vs. Brawn, this season ended up being in the bottom five of the series.

Undoubtedly there will be an all-star edition of the format in the near future (they are already recycling Blood vs. Water), so here is my suggestion for the cast. I did fill the Beauty tribe with all hot chicks because I do not think anyone wants to know my thoughts on the subject. Plus, let’s be honest, the idea of a “beauty” tribe is that the members use their looks to advance and guys just do not do that. Look at this past season, two of the male beauties looked like they could have very well been on the Brawn tribe.

Brains
Ciera Eastin (Blood vs. Water)
Kim Spradlin (One World)
Sophie Clarke (South Pacific)
Rob Cesternino (Amazon)
Stephen Fishbach (Tocantins)
Todd Herzog (China)

Beauty
Parviti Shallow (Cooke Island)
Andrea Boehlke (Redemption Island)
Morgan McLeod (Cagayan)
Natalie Tenerelli (Redemption Island)
Chelsea Meissner (One World)
Mikayla Wingle (Phillippines)

Brawn
Kat Edorsson (One World)
Cliff Robinson (Cagayan)
Jeff Kent (Philippines)
James Clement (Blood vs. Water)
Stephenie LaGrossa (Palau)
Abi-Maria Gomes (Philippines)

You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Cagayan on iTunes.

The Americans: With teaser at the end of the first season finale it seemed obvious that Paige would learn of her parents other lives sometime this season. And with Larrick hot on their trail, it seemed likely that he would kidnap and she would learn that way. Oops, got that totally wrong. It turns out it was the other kid who learned of his parents extracurricular activities. And then killed his parents. Alrighty, that was a bit rushed. But it did set up would could be a fascinating third season where Paige has to find out about her parents… right?
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

The Challenge: Free Agents: I have to grown whenever a new cast is announce and Johnny Bananas is once again a part of the season. And I have done a lot of growing because this is his tenth Challenge (he, along with C.T. and Anessa have tied Paula for the most appearance; and since I was on the Wikipeia page, I was flabbergasted to see Cara Maria just tied Sarah for most consecutive Challenges ever with seven, who keeps asking her back). So it says a lot that for the first time ever I was actually rooting for Bananas in an elimination round. That shows you juts how much of a douche Jordan is. And really there are very few things more entertaining than Jordan calling his shot against Bananas and then lose. And not just lose, but fail epically, falling of the wall. Good riddance Jordan, here is hoping you do not reach Johnny’s record.
You can download The Challenge: Free Agents on iTunes.

Hannibal: Well, frack, that is how you do a season finale. It may take me a couple days to fully compute what just happened.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Hannibal on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 5/11/14

Once Upon a Time: They may have foiled the Wicked Witch but it looks like some sort of curse was enacted when she was converted to porcelain and shattered by Mr. Gold. Could that have been her plan all along, or possibly a back up plan?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Resurrection: So Agent Bellamy is the son of the black family that drowned in the flood. Except I am guessing that he grew up in the seventies even though his family looks like they are dressed from the time of the Dust bowl. Does this mean Agent Bellamy was the first to return about thirty years ago? I guess the timing could link up that he returned right when Jacob died. The first season was pretty pedestrian, but I am still intrigued by a second season.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Resurrection on iTunes.

Mad Men: Drunk Don Draper already? That did not take long. But I have to wonder if Rodger would have stayed at the commune had some hippie did not try to have sex with his daughter with him right there.
You can download Mad Men on iTunes.

Crisis: The weakest part of the show has always been the icky teacher-student relationship but they somehow were able to come to a satisfying ending to the storyline. Not only did the creepy guard kill the teacher, the student ended up killing the creepy guard in some weird love triangle ending of Romeo and Juliet. Awesome.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Crisis on iTunes.

Revenge: I have been mostly underwhelmed by the last two seasons of Revenge after a strong debut season but who Emily brought down Conrad was the biggest “Oh snap” moment of the show, better than even anything in the first season. Hopefully the show can carry that over to the season finale and a fourth season… if there is a fourth season.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

The Blacklist: So this whole time, Red has been hunted by Bane? At least I got a distinct Bane vibe from the airplane scenes except the television show cannot afford to rip a plane in two.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Blacklist on iTunes.

Castle: Wow, they actually ended the Beckett’s mother case. In the past, once the perp is caught, they move onto the next case, I do wonder if we will actually get to see any of the court proceedings with the Senator. And catching him a week before the wedding seems a bit ominous. I wonder if the Senator will be sending anyone to speak now before forever holding their peace. Assuming he does not do it himself if he is award bail.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: It continues to look like Ward is still full evil, dude shot a dog. Though it is unclear if him sending FitzSimmons to the bottom of the ocean (how Angel of the writers) was a Bond villain type plan of letting them die out of sight when it is plausible they could escape, or he did that knowing the duo would find a way out and it would be safer than being on a plane with Deathlock 1.0.

We did learn a little more about Skye… sort of. The Woman in a Flower Dress thinks they are the same inside (though we have no clue that she actually is) and that it was her parents they destroyed her village and they were monsters, but no clue if they are literal or figurative monsters. One more episode left, hopefully they give some definitive answers. I also wonder if there will be any set up to Guardians of the Galaxies as this will be the last episode before that film premieres. Could Skye unknown origin be related to a character in the movie?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

The Goldbergs: Great George the Animal Steele reference.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Goldbergs on iTunes.

Survivor: Cagayan: It seems clear that some people come on the show gunning for second place knowing that it is easier to stay on the show longer trying for runner up instead of winner. I would say Russell Hantz was the first to do this, but he may have been delusional to think he could be a douchebag to everyone and they would hand over a million dollars to him. So Russell may have just been a template for people Philip Sheppard to copy, where you just act a fool and assume someone would be smart enough to want sit next to you in the final Tribal. This season Cass is clearly the person everyone would want to sit next to at the Final Tribal except I do not think she is playing for second, she actually thinks Tony is Russell Hantz, but if she thinks she can beat Tony, or anyone else, she is as delusional as Russell. Plus Cass ruined what could have been an alltime great Tribal Council with a three way tie and a use of a Special Powers Idol all at the same Tribal. Boooooooo.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Cagayan on iTunes.

The Americans: Oh wow, they went ahead and killed the new handler. Did not see that coming. I wonder if they are hoping Margo Martindale will be able to return next season. (Unfortunately The Millers was renewed, she and Beau Bridges deserve The Americans and Masters of Sex more than this horrible sitcom; I weep every time I watch). With only two episodes left, I am guessing Larrick will find the Jennings’ home by the end of the season. Hopefully this means Paige will finally learn of her parent’s secret lives.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

Nashville: I found it interesting that they cut off the First Lady during her speech. I wonder how they came to this decision. Did she write her speech herself (or, well her own speechwriters) and they cut away from her because it got too boring. Did the show’s writers write it and then decided it went on too long? Did they write a break in the speech and when we could not hear her she was only speaking gibberish. At any rate, I was disappointed that her cameo did not involve coming to Maddie’s school to warn her the dangers of doing drugs.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.

The Challenge: Free Agents: I am really beginning to hate Jordon with a fiery passion. I hate him so much I am even siding with Johnny Bananas for the first time in his long history on the show.
You can download The Challenge: Free Agents on iTunes.

Hannibal: Last week, for the second time this season, I assumed that the female in a dire situation would be eventually revealed to still alive by the end of the season. I was extremely wrong when it came to Beverly and it looked like I was wrong about Freddie too. I figure Will could store her out of sight until he catches Hannibal but did he really have the power to fake dental records. Apparently yes with help from Jack.

And just when you thought the show could not get any more messed up, here comes the Verger’s. I get that Mason performed an abortion on his sister to make sure he is the lone male Verger heir, but did he also remove her lady parts to make sure she would never conceive again? That was the impression that I got.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Hannibal on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 5/4/14

Orphan Black: I would not have a problem if an episode this season features only Allison’s community theater play.
You can download Orphan Black on iTunes.

Once Upon a Time: Well that was a plot twist I did not see coming, Snow White enacting the curse, not the Wicked Witch. Granted Snow and Charming sharing half a heart was a very cheap way to keep him alive. I wonder if that is how they are able to resurrect Bae. And I have to wonder if Sleeping Beauty was one of the flying monkeys that got zapped, once everyone got their memories back, no one seemed to care if that was a possibility.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Resurrection: As Tom cried over Rachael, I jokingly wanted to say to the screen, dude, she can always get resurrected again. Granted I did not think they would do it ten minutes later. If she came back so quickly, where did Caleb go? I am guessing since he is a bad person, he had to go somewhere else. And it finally took a grand exodus of the dead for the Langston family to realize their mother / wife may be back. I knew she was back when we first met her lover. After a meandering first season, hopefully with the influx of dead, things pick up next week.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Resurrection on iTunes.

Mad Men: There is nothing more depressing than the first Betty Draper sighting of the season reminding everyone she is for some reason still part of the cast even though Betty just sticks out like a sore thumb. Okay, Don’s panic attack while going back the first time in about a year was slightly more depressing. But we did learn what exactly was Don’s status, half the partners thought he was just on permanent leave, half thought he was fired but stayed on the payroll because it would cost too much to buy him out. So Don is back in, but it sounds like he will be stuck in Lane’s old office, probably the first person since he died there, and has to report to Lew. Yeah, I put the over/under before Lew quits at four episodes.
You can download Mad Men on iTunes.

Crisis: So the FBI teamed up with the kidnappers finally. I have a feeling it will go even further next week when the FBI agent asks the kidnappers help save her sister.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Crisis on iTunes.

The Blacklist: Holy Allen Alda sighting! I forgot he was even part of this show because I do not believe we have seen him yet this year. We did get to see more of his cabal and I get the sense he is part of some illuminati type group. They also brought back Red killing Lizzie’s dad except we still have no clue why so we are left to still assume he is her real dad. Apparently we will start getting some answers this week as it is the finale episode (dramatic pause) before the finale. Seriously promo monkeys, stop doing that, if you must, just tell me how many episodes are left this season, do not give me a number and have to add one for the finale.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Blacklist on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: So Phil was actually behind TAHITI. Huh. So the memory wipe was hopefully to stem the side effects. So what side effects will Skye get? Or will she not get any because she did not die first. Or maybe because she is an object of unknown origin. But the show seems to be back to spinning its wheels after ramping up to the Captain America movie. With only two episodes left in the season, it should be ramping up for the finale, but it feels as if we have already reached the climax of the season.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Survivor: Cagayan: I never understand why anyone actually buys food at the action knowing there would be some sort of advantage offered at some point. I do believe this was the first time three contestants saved their money. Of course Probst made up some rule on the fly and of course Tony got the black rock and of course he was able to find the Idol. Yawn. And next week looks worse when they may target Tony who we know has no chance of going home because he can play the stupid special powers Idol after the votes were read.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Cagayan on iTunes.

The Americans: So Henry tried breaking and entering last week and Paige tried her hand at forgery this week. Is this show just an allegory of how teenagers are like international spies? But anyway. I had to look up Annelise to see if we have actually met her yet or if her dealings with Philip was before the show started. Apparently she was in the episode where the Commies bugged the Secretary of Defense.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

Nashville:
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.

The Challenge: Free Agents: I had to laugh when Johnny Bananas was being so appalled that Jordan would shout down a woman when ten minute earlier we saw Bananas gleefully talking about bowling over Cara Maria.
You can download The Challenge: Free Agents on iTunes.

Hannibal: Sure I said the same thing with Beverly, but I have a sinking suspicion that Freddie is still alive. And not only is she alive, Will actually saved her from certain death. I do not think it is a coincidence that Hannibal was sitting patiently in his clear suit after Alana told the duo that Freddie thought they were working in tandem as the Chesapeake Ripper (people who think this tend not to walk around free for very long aside from Sully who hightailed it out of town). So Will either has her secured in his basement or told her to lay low until he outs Hannibal and is content to let Hannibal think he killed Freddie.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Hannibal on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 4/27/14

Orphan Black: (Please not this is a review of last week's episode) I watched the first season over the course of about a week last summer and it is always a little weird when you switch from marathoning to weekly watching. I was ready to watch a new episode the next day but alas, that is not an option when you watch it like. I need my soccer mom fix. Much like the first season, Alison stole the premiere with the three most entertaining scenes: using her mace and rape whistle, her community theater production, and getting a piece for Sarah (and how she delivered it to her).
You can download Orphan Black on iTunes.

Once Upon a Time: So Cora orchestrated her daughter to be married to a dude she used to be engaged to? Eww. Maybe that séance should have taken place on Springer. And I am starting to think the Wicked Witch’s spell is going to succeed, just not the way she wants. I predicted that they will go back far enough to save Neil, but not far enough for the Wicked Witch to kill Snow White’s mother.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Mad Men: Last week it seemed like Don was still on his indefinite hiatus but the partners make it seem that he was fired but still on the payroll. Are they keeping him around just to keep him from going anywhere else? And just when you thought Don’s life could not get any more depressing, he gets fully dressed at 8:00 just to meet with his secretary who he has spying for him.
You can download Mad Men on iTunes.

Crisis: Ever since it was hinted that the kidnappers had an overall noble endgame (show the CIA’s evil super-soldier program) I figured it was only a matter of time before they would team up with the FBI. I am guessing the ending is the start of that where they help each other out and slowly turn the CIA into the bad guys.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Crisis on iTunes.

The Voice: Yep, I am pretty much done with this season. Hopefully they find some actual interesting singers next season. But as the last three seasons have played out, I get the sence the show is not interested in those types of singers anymore.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu.

The Blacklist: After he promos, I was expecting a better fight between Mr. and Mrs. Keen than that. You could even see Tom check himself whe hitting Lizzie with the chair.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Blacklist on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: When agent Ward turned heel, I had a sinking suspicion that he would eventually turn out to be a triple agent and he just stunned Agent Hand and all the others he “killed.” That I getting less likely after wiping the blood of Agent Koenig from his strangling wire. But why bring in Patton Oswaltt only to kill him a week later. Oh well, at least next week has Robin Scherbatsky!
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Survivor: Cagayan: After teasing it about a month ago, we finally learned what “special powers” the new Idol has and it is extremely stupid. Basically Tony can play the Idol even after the votes are read. Now we know Tony will not be voted off because he calls pull out his Idol even after the votes have been read ruining all suspense. At least with the regular Idol there is the suspense of will someone use it or not, if they give it away, will they give it to the right person, a lot of different scenarios. Now we know if Tony is targeted, he is safe no matter what. This is so stupid. They have rolled out plenty of stupid ideas on Survivor, but "Special Idol" may overtake Redemption Island as dumbest of all.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Cagayan on iTunes.

The Americans: Yeah, communist going to church went about as well as I expected it to. But I did not think Philip actually went to the church to actually beat up the minister, I thought he was just going to steal the money back. But the minister calling him out for his anger issues actually worked.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

Bad Teacher: Dick Casablancas, Antoine Meriwether, and Dr. Dre deserved better than this.
You can download Bad Teacher on iTunes.

The Challenge: Free Agents: I stopped watching The Real World circa Las Vegas, the first one, but I do listen to Grantland’s The Right Reason’s podcast so I had high hopes for “Hurricane” Nia. Unfortunately she was not even a high wind warning. Even during the After Show she seemed like the normal one next to Jasmine. This has to be the biggest bust since Jamarcus Russell. At least she gave us a good quote on her way out, “You don’t go for 85 minutes and not wimp out. That is over an hour and a half.”
You can download The Challenge: Free Agents on iTunes.

Hannibal: This is the best looking show on television, but that whole home invasion scene just came off as clunky, it just never felt very well paced. The season itself has seemed to hit a lull after Will was released from prison and now we wait until Jack confronts Hannibal from the season premiere flash forward.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Hannibal on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 4/19/14

Once Upon a Time: Please no more Captain Hook centric episodes, that was almost as boring as the Neverland episodes.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Mad Men: Last season was the deconstruction of Don Draper, hitting rock bottom to the point he actually revealed his past to his children. One would believe this season will be the redemption of Draper. He impressed Peggy with a presentation via Freddie Rumson. He was even able to turn down the advances of a fellow plane passenger that vaguely looked like Neve Campbell and admit to her that his wife knows he is a horrible person. Wait that actually was Neve Campbell? Oh wow.

There have been conspiracy theories since the beginning of the show is that the title sequence foreshadowing someone literally jumping out of a window. Most of them center on Rodger. I am not one of them because I have always thought it was a metaphorical of someone’s downward spiral. But I have to admit during the final scene, there was part of me that thought, “Oh no, Don is going to throw himself off the balcony.”
You can download Mad Men on iTunes.

Crisis: This show is surprisingly good in a best case scenario for a network to rip off Homeland kind of way. Plus the show is not afraid to get weird, which usually happens in the kidnapped house. But since this is on the same network as Hannibal, it is disappointing when the show hints, but does not go there. Like when the capture told the nerd to “touch” the student council president, he goes in for the hug, disappears off camera, and then they end the scene. Obviously from the reactions afterwards something happened, but what exactly? You know Hannibal would not have cut that scene short.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Crisis on iTunes.

Revenge: Emily finally brought back her read Sharpie, but what exactly role did Victoria play in it? It sounded like she was setting Emily up for something, but it did not seem to play out.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

2 Broke Girls: It has been a while since I have seen Lindsay Lohan in anything (I had to look at IMDB and aside from a cameo in Machete and a couple SNL hosting gigs, I have not see her in anything since Mean Girls, ten years ago). If this was the start of a comeback, she is going to have to go back to the drawing board because it was a pretty cringeworthy performance.
You can download 2 Broke Girls on iTunes.

Dallas: Very few things on television are truly shocking anymore, but I did not see Pamela breaking into J.R. Jr’s room just to offer up a threesome with his mistress.
You can download Dallas on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: I realized this episode just how much more I liked Agent Tripp on the team instead of the boring Ward. Hopefully they make this permanent. But I do have a sinking suspicion that Ward will turn out to be a triple agent. Sure that will be silly considering all the people he killed (but they could have been stunner bullets and Garrett did not bother to check for blood) and help get all the technology from SHIELD faculty (but it could be all planted). But then again, why would Coulson tell Ward of the secret floor with the Gravitron? Unless he wanted Ward to find it.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Survivor: Cagayan: Ugg, I am really ready for Tony to get his comeuppance. Since he was the focus of the whole episode, I was expecting someone was going to turn and blindside him. I still do not understand why the Brains on the bottom have not looked at the majority alliance, see there are three Brawn, two Beauties, and one Brain and give the, do not let the Brawn run away with this, let’s start a Brains and Beauty alliance and boot the Brawns. This week would have been perfect when it was three on three on three. I guess that can become a better sell in two weeks if a Brain is ousted next.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Cagayan on iTunes.

The Americans: I really wanted Philip and Elizabeth’s debate on the luxuries of capitalism to be longer. It is a fascinating discussion of enjoying the very ideas you are supposed to be fighting against. I at the very least would rather they have that discussion about their kids growing up as fully fledged Americans then watching the kids break into other people’s homes to play ColecoVision.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

Community: Many people considered last year a bastard season of the show without creator Dan Harmon around, but the lack of Pierce and Troy this season made this season feel just as disjointed. But I would still watch a sixth season and possibly a movie if there is one next year. If not, I would probably watch Celebrity Beat Off with ?uestlove instead. Though a Jeff and Britta spin-off sounds horrible. An Annie’s Boobs spin-off would be much better.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Community on iTunes.

Parenthood: I was disappointed in the lack of Haddie lesbianism in the episode. We have not seen her all season; you could give her more than three of four scenes. And no one is going to point out her former black male boyfriend? We certainly defiantly did not need any of the Ryan scenes (oh please have Amber’s test come out negative). I guess it was a fitting ending of a lackluster season.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Parenthood on iTunes.

The Challenge: Free Agents: Oh Camilla, this is the very reason why you get invited back every season, because you are good for one epic drunken stupor per season. Sure the latest one probably does not crack the top five greatest Camilla drunken stupor power rankings, but I do wonder if this was a passing of the guard situation with Nany taking the drunken stupor torch from Camilla because Nany really out-Camillaed Camilla in that fight. If this is the end of the line for Camilla, it has been a hall of fame time run for her.
You can download The Challenge: Free Agents on iTunes.

Hannibal: It seems like I say this every episode, but the stuffing a dead person in a dead horse is the creepiest motif in the show’s history. Well that was until Jeremy Davies (how has it taken him that long to appear on this show; it seems so obvious) stuffed a living person into a dead horse.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Hannibal on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 3/16/14

Once Upon a Time: Since everyone who gets more than one line is inevitably going to turn out to be a fairy tale character so from the first moment I assumed Emma’s new boyfriend was not who he said he was. Since the promos that reran ad nausea hyped the debut of the Wicked Witch of the (presumably) West, my first guesses were Oz related: maybe the Wizard himself, or The Scarecrow, Tin Man, or Cowardly Lion. Surprisingly we did not have to wait a season or two to find out who the boyfriend was as at the end of the episode he turned into a fracking bad CGI flying monkey. Awesome. (On a side note, when is NBC going to reboot Quantum Leap with Christopher Gorham, that dude can easily pass off as Scott Backula’s kid.)
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

The Walking Dead: Did we finally learn what Rick’s three questions for joining the group that was that was hinted way back in the season premiere? Daryl did ask Bob three questions when they met: 1) How many zombies have you killed? 2) How many humans have you killed? 3) Why?
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Resurrection: From the promos, the show did not look all that good, but I was intrigued by how they would explain it all. Except my sources tell me that the book the show is base on does not actually explain why these people come back. I did find the premiere compelling, but I am not sure how the story plays out over a whole season, let alone a series. And if there is no answer, that will be very frustrating. But I will probably stick with it because it is currently stuck right between my hate watching ABC Sunday’s schedule.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Resurrection on iTunes.

Revenge: So Nico captures Aiden and can easily avenge her father’s death (which make the show much better because the show has been on a steep slide since introducing Aiden) but instead concocts some James Bond villain sinister plan to kill his love in front of him before killing him. Of nothing goes as plan, and instead of Emily killing Nico, she is allowed to weirdly slink out the loft. Then you have Victoria killing her baby daddy and Conrad’s first wife is Jack’s mother. Ugg. Just end this show now.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

The Voice: So the Blind Auditions are done and not one singer really worth caring about. I may be out on this season faster than I was last one. But since I made it though the first round, my first, and maybe only, Power Rankings of the season will be posted tomorrow.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs performed this week with the widget at right.

How I Met Your Mother: So Lilly paid the bartender a lot of money to make sure she always has a non-alcholoic drink in her hand this weekend? Ugg, just end this show already.
You can stream recent episodes over at cbs.com. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: The reason why we have not seen any of Marvel’s big named heroes was evident this week (well other than obvious monetary reasons). This was hyped as the Lady Sif episode, but really, it turned out to be more Lorelei-centric. And as it is with the movies, the villains are much more interesting and in the short time you have in an episode, you have to focus on the bad guy. If they brought in a bigger name than Sif, the show would have to self most of the cast to fit them in (Skye already spent most of this episode in bed). But I would not mind a Lady Sif spin-off.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Pretty Little Liars: So Ezra thinks that A is Allison’s mother who is trying to make is safe for her to come back to Rosewood, but Allison verified her mother does not know she is alive. After a very heavy handed season, next week’s Ally Tells All episode better actually tell all. And let me go ahead and guess that the person under the mask is Mona (assuming it is not Allison at the beginning of the episode).
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Justified: Finally, Raylan has found a law enforcement agent as prickly as him, but before you suggest he get transferred to the Memphis DEA office, Dewey Crowe had to go and run over him before Danny could test out the twenty-one foot rule on Eric Roberts (but the promos suggests that Danny will get to ret that again next week on Raylan which I am sure will end humorously). But the scene where Raylan and Roberts entered Audrey’s was just one of those scenes that the show does just so well. Surprisingly the body count was low.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Justified on iTunes.

Survivor: Cagayan: Just like the Race Wars season, it seems like they are ditching the gimmick a little too soon but after the Brains lost four of five Challenges, three of which were for Immunity, it was inevitable. We will have to wait until next week if just the Brains have to drop their buffs and get absorbed or all three will be mixed up. If it is the latter hopefully my two favorites who were being targeted this week, Cliff and Morgan end up in cushier situations, maybe on the same tribe. But how exactly did Cops-R-Us (Philip Sheppard should sue for copyright infringement) think they could throw a basketball challenge with Cliff Robinson on their team?
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Cagayan on iTunes.

The Americans: After the tease at the end of season one, I was excited for potential of Paige to figure out her parents’ secret. But after three episodes of near misses, I am ready for her to finally learn the truth. I really hope they are not waiting for this season’s finale (or longer) for that to happen.
You can download The Americans on iTunes.

Nashville: Oh Juliet, pulling that kind of stunt is what got you dropped in the first place. Thankfully she has not learned her lesson because the show would be a lot less entertaining. The other big bombshell was Will proposing to his beard. Hopefully this means we are closer to somebody outing him because that would be a much more interesting storyline than him staying in the closet and hating himself.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.

Parenthood: All the lackluster and annoying storylines this season were almost all worth it for that dinner scene where basically everyone came out in the opening for everyone, including Jasmine’s family and minister, to hear. And Drew, who was always low man on the Braverman Power Ranking, may finally be moving up after his roommate hooked up with his former bootie call. But it kind of sounded like they are actually going to ruin that awesomely awkward dynamic by having Drew move in with his sister, which could get really awkward too considering her place is only one room.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Parenthood on iTunes.

King of the Nerds: I liked the changed final challenge this season from the Survivor like popularity contest to an actual nerd skills competition. But for the second straight year, a girl one which makes me wonder if a guy will ever win this show. They might as well call it Queen of the Nerds at this point.
You can download King of the Nerds on iTunes.

Hannibal: I do not know what is says about me that I recognize that the bailiff was murdered the way that Will is accused of his victims before forensics made the same assumption. And by killing the judge, does that mean Hannibal wants to keep Will in a perpetual state of innocent until proven guilty but still in prison? I would have never had guessed a court room based episode would be this engrossing, but of course was able to pull out an epic one.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Hannibal on iTunes.