Previewing Masters of Sex: Season Four

Every season Masters of Sex has a time jump a couple months or years, but the way last season ended, with Virginia hoping Bill would stop her from getting married to the Smell King and Bill giving up and then getting arrested, I was hoping the new season would start of not that far in the future. As luck will have it, season four starts up while Virginia is still on her honeymoon and Bill still behind bars for paying one of his sex surrogates, which kind of made it prostitution.

Despite being on her honeymoon, Virginia’s new husband is conspicuously absent throughout the whole first episode though Virginia still manages to keep herself busy attending a sex seminar that just so happens to take place at her hotel and by, um, other means. Bill on the other hand is out of jail pretty quickly but is slow to make it back to the office where Betty hilariously holds down the fort after everyone takes an unannounced extended leave.

Even though the season resumes in 1968, the gang will eventually find themselves in the swinging seventies. Libby will find that her name may be short for “liberation” a she will be part of bra burning crowd after finally admitting her husband is having an affair. One new face this year is Niecy Nash as a local AA - chairperson running Masters’ court-ordered daily meetings. And what would be the swinging seventies be without a little Hef as the Playboy founder plays a pivotal role in at the end of the premiere.

Masters of Sex airs Sundays at 10:00 on Showtime.

Previewing Barely Famous: Season Two and Dating Naked: Season Three

When Barely Famous premiered I heralded a changing at VH1. After year of being an trashy urban reality show channel, they seemed to be switching coarse going back to it musical roots with the nineties nostalgia Hindsight which fit in perfectly at the channel that used to run I Love the 90’s about fifty hours a week. Then there also were staking a claim in faux reality show based around eighties heavyweights Lionel Richie and David Foster’s daughters. Then there was a changing of the guard at the channel and they quickly decided to cancel Hindsight because the second season started filming and then greenlit more trashy reality shows including a Black Ink Crew spin off and a The Game dating show with an Amber Rose talk show coming next month. I got excited for a moment when it was announced VH1 was bringing back Hip Hop Honors after a six year hiatus

But hey, they still have Barely Famous and Dating Naked, both returning tonight as their lone none-trashy urban reality shows (and possibly Candidly Nicole and Twinning which may or may not be canceled; and really, no big loss if they are). The first season Was a fun summer diversion which was wisely keep to a short and easy six episodes. Another sic episodes are coming your way this summer but even though the new season is short and sweet, it really just seems like a rehash of last season.

Sara and Erin are back and it is basically just a continuation of last season where the sisters commiserate with each other on their social staus while desperately trying to move up the ladder. That shtick was wear thin even after six episodes las season and is stretch even thin this season. The season premiere sees Sara trying to extend her brand (okay, try to create one) with an energy drink while Erin tries to get on Jessica Alba’s new show’s writing staff. Also tonight, there is a second episode where VH1 sends the duo to Orlando for a vacation episode where they run into the fourth most successful former NSync member at Universal Studios.

Later in the season, there will be more celebrity cameos including Kate Hudson, Zach Braff, Kate Upton, Cindy Crawford, Brooke Burke, Dr. Phil, Ali Larter, and Lauren London. But all these cameos fall into one of two categories much like the ones last season. There are just there to look down on the barely famous sisters and be indignant of being around a reality show or play completely opposite of their public person like when Alba drunkenly twerks at a karaoke bar (I am kind of depressed that Microsoft Word recognizes “twerk” as a real word). Upton is the best of the bunch as a brain surgeon on Sara latest crap movie.  It just really feels like VH1, and everyone who used to watch the channel, is just waiting four more year so they can finally do I Love the 10’s. And that is if they even wait, they did premiere I Love the New Millennium in 2008.

Barely Famous airs Wednesdays at 10:00 on VH1.


Speaking of that other non-urban housewife show, Dating Naked also returns tonight. The first season of the show was cheesy fun. Sure I did not watch a single episode in its entirety, basically just channel surfed upon it and kept surfing when it went to commercial. It is probably why in the second season the show made a more continuous switch to two permanent daters to keep people from going in and out on the show. Okay that did not work with me because I ended up watching the show less.

There will be two permanent daters again this season, dancer Natalie and former college basketball player David who is the first minority main contestant on a dating show. The only big change to the third season is there is a new host who is about as forgettable (and fully clothed) as the last one. Except the more the new host talks, the more she sounds like Fran Dresher. After dating themselves, Natalie and David find themselves on two more dates, one of which they pick to be their “keeper” who will show up next week. It is pretty obvious who both pick this week as one dud clearly had adult ADHD and one chick thinks the guy should come to her even though he is the one doing the picking. The “This season on” montage is not very inspiring either other than there being what will likely be the oldest naked dude in the history of television (hard pass on that episode) and a chick who kind of looks like Sara Bareilles. I watched less of season two of Dating Naked than season one and based on the first episode I will likely watch less of season three.

Dating Naked airs Wednesdays at 9:00 on VH1.

Previewing Ray Donovan: Season Four

I am sure someone like Ray Donovan has woken up in some weird places, but where he starts off the fourth season of the show named after him may be his weirdest yet: in an unknown room with a blind priest reading what I presume to be a braille Bible in what I presume to be Latin. He got there after last season getting shot in the gut during a shootout with Armenian gangsters and instead of a doctor, when to a church and collapsed.

We quickly flash forward to a time in the future where Ray is back to work, Bridget has still not come home but at least is on talking status with her family, Bunchy’s lucha wrestling bride is about to pop a baby out any day. Then there is Micky, last seen leaving California as part of a deal with Ray for taking care of his Armenian problem, actually has a new job on an Indian reservation. That is not to say he still is not up to his old tricks, because, as always with Micky, he has an angle.

Back in California, Ray met a boxer during his sabbatical in the church, and now in present time, the boxer of course needs Ray’s services when cops are called during a shouting match at a cheap motel. No, it is not what you think, the woman in question is the boxer’s sister (welcome back Lisa Bonet) who may be the most difficult person Donovan and associates have ever had to deal with, and that says a lot from the lowlife he has run into the past three seasons.

Ray Donovan airs Sundays at 9:00 on Showtime.

Previewing Murder in the First: Season Three

Cop shows have populated television as long as anyone can remember. There would be a crime at the start of the episode and solved by the end and then repeat for a hundred episodes and then probably spin it off. About a decade ago shows became more serialized and we got a few cop shows that would take a whole season to solve… or two in case of the first high profile one The Killing. At least the first season of Murder in the First ended with the murderer getting caught. Then in the second season, the show got a little creative, there was a school shooting in the first episode, except by the end of the episode, one suspect was dead the other was in custody. The rest of the season followed that case to trail and there was a secondary plot about the murder of a cop that involved the drug trade in Los Angeles.

The third season of Murder in the First starts off with a dinner meeting involving the District Attorney who not so conspicuously gets up to “make a phone call” moment as the younger hot chick leaves the table. We do get a murder in the second scene at the birthday party of a star quarterback. Sure every cop show has done the celebrity murder episode, sometimes once or twice a season, but the second death of the episode is much more shocking, especially when it comes to who does it, which will likely be the more interesting storyline of the season.

One thing the season long cases do is allow the viewers to go home with the cops, for better or worse (I would argue the latter; there were fewer things I wanted to see on The Killing than the frumpy cop in the sweater spend an entire episode looking for her kid). It is a bit eye rolling when Hildy’s eleven year old gets caught with something you do not want your kid to have. But things get worse for her when she get a call from her doctor with news they do not want to share over the phone.

Murder in the First airs Sundays at 10:00 on TNT. You can also download Murder in the First on iTunes.

Previewing Roadies

I am a Cameron Crowe loyalist. I really enjoyed Elizabethtown (hot take alert: the Freebird scene is better Tiny Dancer) and will even defend Aloha (c’mon people, it featured Emma Stone and Bill Murray dancing). But even the biggest critics his most recent work has to admit that Almost Famous is great. The film features a young writer who goes on the road with a rock band (based on Crowe’s time at Rolling Stone) so you have to get excited when Crowe’s first venture to the small screen sees Crowe get back on the traveling concerts business with Roadies.

As the title suggests, the new show focuses on the men and women who move tours from town to town and (hopefully) makes sure everything move slowly. The cast includes Luke Wilson (Legally Blonde) as the tour manager, Carla Gugino (Son in Law) as the production manager, Imogen Poots (That Awkward Moment) takes care of lighting, Keisha Castle-Hughes (Whale Rider), Ron White (Horrible Bosses) as the road manager, Richard Baker (Machine Gun Kelly) just wants any job on the tour (and gets a pretty humorous one). And since every show needs a little conflict, Rafe Spall (One Day) shows up as a financial guy who tries to make the tour run more efficiently (i.e. fire people), and when pressed about the type of music he listens to says Queen and The Mumford Sons.

Much like Almost Famous, the band on tour is fake, in this case The Station-House Band. It seems like the band was big last decade and can now live off touring, Kings of Leon being the best comparison I can think of. And wisely instead of trying to create fake hit songs for the band, we (as of yet) do not get to hear the band play a song. Though the headliners are fake, the opening acts are real. The Head and the Heart show up in the premiere, Reignwolf in the second, Lindsey Buckingham pops up in the third (those were all the episodes I have seen but I hope that the opening acts turn into a Spinal Tap drummer situation where the band just cannot seem to hold on to them).

Not only did Cameron Crowe create the show, he also wrote and directed the first episode (and third, he just listed as director for the second), for better or worse. The show has all the charm you get with his movies and you can add Imogen Poots to the long list of great female leads that Crowe was able to get a career defining performance out of. Even Machine Gun Kelly, whose music I find unbearable and despite not even being a good actor, comes off as a likeable goof reciting Crowe’s words. And of course the music curation is great, each episode even features a “song of the day” which is cool even if is just a cheap way to fit in a montage. But along with what is great about Cameron Crowe the show also includes its flaw like how he can be too earnest at time. What Poots goes on a diatribe about how fake climatic running scenes at the end of movies are, you just know she is going to break out into a sprint by the end of the first episode, set to Pearl Jam to boot.

Still with its flaws, Roadies is the best music themed show I have ever seen. Sure Cameron Crowe’s plots are not always coherent (what was Aloha about again) but the journey is always great. And what better journey than going town to town following a rock band. And even if you are not sold on the premiere (which you can watch for free below or check your On Demand channel for an uncensored version) I suggest at least give it to the third episode when Rainn Wilson (who played a Rolling Stone staffer in Almost Famous) shows up as a jaded rock critic who gave a negative review based solely on a fan’s YouTube video and Lindsey Buckingham who turns in his best work since his guest stint on What’s Up with That?

Roadies airs Sundays at 10:00 on Showtime.

Previewing Animal Kingdom

There has been a lot of discussion of how hard times are for networks over the last five years or so, for the first time ever, a show that averaged sub 1.0 rating got renewed last May on the big, and actually it was five that were granted a reprieve. Though not as discussed, thing are looking bad on cable too. TNT and USA have historically been the most viewed cable channels but things are getting dire. Both used to have very distinct visions, TNT had dramas in vein of network procedurals while USA was known for its fun in the sun show. But those procedurals are getting long in the tooth and low in the ratings while the sunny shows no longer have bright rating.

With brands of shows no longer working, both channels are trying something different and trying to go after FX brand of more prestige show. USA hit it out of the park last summer with Mr. Robot, the most critically acclaimed show in recent memory. Though follow up, Colony did not get much buzz, and Shooter, based on the Marky Mark movie does not really pique my interest either. Up first for TNT’s attempt at prestige drama is Animal Kingdom from John Wells who has worked on everything from ER to most recently Shameless.

Animal Kingdom starts off with one of the stranger openers fo show without any sci-fi element with a dude nonchalantly watching Press Your Luck while what looked o be an overdosed woman next to him before paramedics look her over. The first hour also ends with the same kid walking through a house nonchalantly while equally troubling scenes are unfolding before he makes I to his room and turns on Press Your Luck.

The kid in question is now in his grandmother’s care and time could not be worse because granny (played by Ellen Barkin) is the matriarch of a family of thieves and it is unclear if they can trust the son of her estranged daughter. The kid’s three uncles are almost ready to put their latest heist in motion and things get even more complicated when uncle number four gets paroled after six years in prison.

I have talked a lot about Silver Age television, prestige shows with good acting, good plot; they are just missing that thing making them great. Ray Donovan is maybe the show that epitomizes the Silver Age and that is one of the biggest comparisons I have for Animal Kingdom, it is just a family of blue color Rays. Another big comparison is Sons of Anarchy (and not because of all the gratuitous male nudity) but instead of a surrogate family of a biker gang, it is an actual family.

But unlike those two shows, the characters of Animal Kingdom do not cross the preverbal line. As the matriarch explains, “We don’t set out to hurt people, we don’t get greedy.” There is not as much violence and it is certainly not as graphic… yet. Clearly one of the uncles has problem and is inches closer and closer to an “any means necessary” philosophy. As with any families there are dark secrets hiding underneath the surface, and the more they seep out, the more interesting Animal Kingdom gets. But I doubt it will ever reach the highs of Mr. Robot.

Animal Kingdom airs Tuesdays at 9:00 on TNT including a back to back premiere tonight. You can also download Animal Kingdom on iTunes.

Previewing Major Crimes

The big new at the start of the new season of Major Crimes is that Rusty got a haircut! Okay not exactly life changing but all jokes aside, there are three characters at the end of the episode who actually do make life changing decisions that will certainly play out for the rest of season five; one by himself, and two who make the plans together.

But before that, there is a case to solve (and that case inspires one of those big life changes). The case of the week involves a volunteer at a homeless outreach program who gets in a fight with her boyfriend while helping. Oh, and after the fight, the boyfriend goes down to Tijuana with friends and conveniently left his cell phone at home. Douchebag boyfriend or mentally unstable homeless person who mistakes kindness for an attack? And of course on a show like this, there are still more red herrings to find along the way.

And while a few characters are looking at big changes to their future, Buzz is looking backward. He has requested the thirty old cold case of his father and uncle and look to finally close that chapter of his life by looking for clues that reopen the case. I smell a season finale case of the week plot cooking.

Major Crimes airs Mondays at 10:00 on TNT. You can also download Major Crimes on iTunes.

Previewing The Last Ship: Season Three

On the cover of Jane’s Addiction’s Nothing's Shocking is a sculpture of a pair of nude female conjoined twins sitting on a sideways rocking chair with their heads on fire, which was pretty shocking for 1988. The band was just a little early because truly nothing is shocking anymore especially on television where deaths have become so commonplace no one even bats an eye. Oh, The Walking Dead killed off another black dude; it must be that time of the season. But I have to admit I was pretty shocked when The Last Ship ended last season with someone walking up to Doctor Scott and shot her point blank. Sure I am the guy who likes to see the cold body until I see I believe someone is dead (and am still a bit suspicious even then… I am looking at you The Blacklist), but a child could kill someone at point blank range, certainly militia man can, right?

I will not spoil Dr. Scott’s fate except to say we get definitive word before the title sequence rolls. Dr. Scott or not, it does not really matter, they were able to mass produce the cure even before she was shot and season three starts off one hundred and fifty-four days into the new president’s tenure who has now taken up shop in St. Louis where the area now has consistent power and some people can even watch his address to the nation on television.

So, um, why is there even a season three if everything is hunky dory? Well those evil Chinese are possibly hording the cure, letting the virus mutate across Asia so the Nathan James has to travel half way around the world to once again try to get the cure in the hands of the sick while fighting off power hungry warlords who gain more power with every death. Except they are down a captain as Chandler has taken a post in the new administration and has stayed in the land-locked new capital and Slattery has now taken the helm of the destroyer. New mother Lieutenant Foster has also traded her navy blues for some civilian clothes in the administration, separating her from her baby daddy.

Of course a diplomacy mission takes Chandler to Japan, not too far from where the Nathan James is sailing. It is also not far from a former flame in the form of Bridget Reagan (Agent Carter) who has taken up in the Chinese consulate during the virus outbreak and is also visiting the same Asian summit. Oh and at the end of the first hour of the two hour premiere someone dies. But to be honest, despite being a recognizable face, I would say this death was nothing shocking.

The Last Ship airs Sundays at 9:00. You can also download The Last Ship on iTunes.

Previewing Wrecked

Longtime readers know I have an irrational hatred of Lost. For six years I thought I was watching a sci-fi show with some relationship aspects but when the how ended I realized all those sci-fi elements did not matter and Lost was no different than all the other nighttime soaps on ABC at that time that just happened to take place in different places. Desperate Housewives took place in the suburbs, Grey’s Anatomy took place in a hospital; Lost just happened to take place on a deserted island with mystical power. But ignored the random four toed statue just offshore, the show was more about Jack and the relationship with his imaginary son. If I could turn a frozen donkey wheel to go back in time to tell my younger self to not watch that show I would.

The first time I saw the trailer for Wrecked, it was completely cold. I had never heard of the show, did not know what to expect. So when the promo started with a group of strangers stranded on a deserted island, I thought, oh goodness no. Then the previous serious tone of the ad ended with a joke and the comedy station TBS logo splashed on the screen, I realized it was not a cheap Lost rip-off, it was actually a cheap Lost parody.

Wrecked is more in vein of a Mel Brookes broad parody than the horible Wayans brother cram in as many references in a minute as they can. Sure the show opens up with the close up of a dude’s face and there is a character in the premiere that I am pretty sure the casting agent said, “get someone who looks exactly like Matthew Fox.” And unlike the creators of Lost who famously wanted to kill off Jack in the first episode of Lost, the writers gleefully do it in the promo for the show. Um, spoiler alert for anyone who did not see that promo.

Really aside from the setting and the brief stint from a Jack-like character, there is not else tying the show to Lost. No flashback, no smoke monster (yet) for better or worse. When the cop admits to another character he was not actually a cop prior to crashing I was fully expecting a flashback with a sight gag of him being the furthest thing from a respectable cop.

Also where the characters on Lost all had roles and their uses, Wrecked is populated by some useless and incompetent people. There is the grown up douchebag frat boy and his long suffering sorority girlfriend, an incompetent male flight attendant, a vapid sports agent, the pretentious liberal, and maybe the most reliable castaway is a podiatrist. Sure there is someone who can kill a boar (possibly with her bare hand), but she is not all there. The cast is rounded out with a loveable lunk who is upbeat despite having his legs crushed by debris and is played by the only recognizable member of the cast played by the lizard man from the best episode of the recent The X-Files reboot. Happy Endings’s Eliza Coupe does show up in the premiere as the higher strung flight attendant but is not seen after the plane crash. We do not see her die so possible she is on the other end of the island with The Others.

After years of putting on traditional sitcoms in vein of eighties multi-cams, TBS is ramping up more adventurous programming starting earlier this year with Angie Tribeca which is currently the funniest show on television and followed that up with the everything goes hilariously wrong The Detour. Wrecked may not be as funny, but in a summer which is lacking anything else in the funny department there are plenty of laughs to be found. My favorite bit being when one castaway finds a DVD player with two hours left of charge and then has to decide whether to watch the important and powerful Selma as possibly their last movie they ever watch, or watch Dumb or Dumber To.

Wrecked airs Tuesdays at 10:00 on TBS.

Previewing Casual: Season Two

The first season of Casual ended in maybe the most casual way, with someone walking in on the girl who he is seeing (who has another serious boyfriend in their open relationship) in bed with his sister. The same sister whose one night stand the guy participated in a foursome with and the girl in the open relationship. Well that was the start of the finale, the season ended just like it began, with the guy, the sister, her daughter in the back of a church. But instead of an imaginary funeral of their father, it is his real wedding to their mother.

The first season of Casual was about dating at different stages of life. Valerie was a recent divorcée dealing with the grief of that ending and trying to find something new, usually disastrously (like ending up in your brother’s bed with his girlfriend). Alex has never had a serious relationship but your aimless twenties start to get old when you are well into your thirties. Then there is Valerie’s daughter Laura who is navigation high school while possibly making the worse decision of the all by making a sex tape in hopes of making her photography teacher jealous.

As the second season start, the family is still together in the same house but there are plenty of changes. Alex has moved into Phase 3 of his life which apparently involves running at dawn, fresh fruit drinks, and yoga. And he is not even picking up chick at yoga either. Laura cannot go back to her old school after a sex scandal and her mother sleeping with photographer teacher. While Vanessa, well, he is dealing with birds and construction in a neighboring office.

There are big changes in the personal lives as well as professional. After what happened last season, Alex’s dating app need help to stay afloat. In walked the very person you do not want see walk into your office: Pete Campbell. Even worse, no one punches him in the first couple episode, granted we had to wait four or five seasons before Lane did something every viewer wanted to see. Disappointment of not seeing Pete Campbell getting decked by a British dude aside (c’mon Leon, you can do it), if you enjoyed the first season, there is plenty in the second to renew your Hulu subscription.

New episodes of Casual premiere Tuesdays on Hulu where the first two episodes of season two (and the entire first season) are available now.

Previewing Angie Tribeca: Season Two

Networks are getting creative with how the roll out new shows these days but none were are bizarre as how TBS debuted Angie Tribeca with a twenty-five hour commercial free marathon and then if you missed it, you could watch all episode via On Demand or if you only watch shows on weekly televised schedules, the season re-aired Mondays. Oh, and before it aired, TBS renewed it for ten more seasons. Okay each season would last one episode so basically it was just like greenlighting a ten episode second season because dumb jokes is what the show does best.

Because of its unconventional rollout it is hard to tell if it was a success or not. The TBS PR department has spun it into one touting 65 million social media impressions and 32% of all binge a thon viewers being first time TBS viewers. We will see how many turn into regular viewers when Angie Tribeca has a more traditional second season. The second season starts Monday with new episodes weekly. Okay to ween you in, the first week there is back to back episodes.

The first season ended on a cliffhanger with a bomb strapped to J. Geils’ chest and Angie refusing to leave his side while it counted down to zero. We do learn the fate of the two cops early on before we flashfoward one year later. Despite the possible gme changing episode and the time jump, the show continues with it dumb fun vibe leave no joke unmade. There are actually a couple changes. Unfortunately the screaming guy coming out of the title sequence is no more (c’mon, South Park made it about ten seasons before running out of ways to kill Kenny, you cannot go more than one; but alas).

The bigger change is there is an actual overarching plotline that weaves throughout the season involving a plot to bring down the mayor that brings in the FBI in the form of Heather Graham (playing Diane Duran, natch) and a not so dead guest from the first season. But there still are plenty of silly case of the week plots including a sushi chef murder which features a creative use of sub-titles, an spin on the ever increasing number of drug advertisements, and a dead boy bander that features actual former boy banders (surprisingly Joey Fatone does not play “the fat one”), and the conclusion of the season long plot is successfully enjoyable and slightly confusion in the most Angie Tribeca way possible at the same time (although they leave a very obvious Scooby Doo joke left unsaid; maybe the one missed joke the show has not made ever). Graham is not the only notable face; Maya Rudolph show up as a romance novelist brought in to help on a cast lampooning all the cop shows with wacky consultants (R.I.P. Castle), Dani Pudi as a app developer for cheaters, an ER reunion during the organ theft episode, and many blink and you will miss them cameos. But sorry, no Bill Murray this season, but if you enjoyed the first season, there is plenty to enjoy in season two. Or technically seasons two through eleven.

Angie Tribeca airs Mondays at 9:00 on TBS.

Previewing Penny Dreadful: Season Three

At the end of the last season of Penny Dreadful, everyone seemed to be leaving Vanessa, Ethan turned himself in to the American lawmen who hunted him for the past two seasons, Sir Malcolm went back to Africa, even the Creature even boarded a ship to an undisclosed location. The only people left in London with here were Ferdinand and Dr. Frankenstein who experienced his own abandonment when Lily chose the company of Dorian Gray over his.

So it is Ferdinand who visits Vanessa at the start of the season while she is living in squalor who shakes off her cobwebs and sends her to a doctor specializing in alienism (the study of mental illness) played by Patti Lupone, just not as the same character she played last season on account that she got tarred and feathered. Across the globe we meet up with Ethan on a train in the New Mexico territory along with his captor and other familiar face. The Creature finds himself at the start of the season on the same boat but is now frozen still in the arctic.

Sir Malcolm meanwhile is in Zanzibar runs into an Indian who has a connection with Ethan. Dr. Frankenstein is also visited by an Indian but this one is from the Asian subcontinent not North American and has a name that everyone will know. Victor’s visitor is not the only new familiar Victorian literary name we hear except the second one we hear is the last word we hear in the season premiere and do not actually get to see the person who introduces himself to a new acquaintance of Vanessa.

The start of the new season is a bit of a slow burn with the main characters spread across three continents and one undisclosed arctic climate, and only two actually interacting with each other (Dorian and Lily are completely absent aside from a couple glimpses in the “previous on” package). But with the introduction of the two new Victorian characters and Lupone’s new creation, the new season looks to shake things up as Penny Dreadful looks to claim the title as best horror show on television.

Penny Dreadful airs Sundays at 10:00 on Showtime. If you can not wait for the premiere you can watch it below (albeit the TV14 version):

Previewing Jack of the Red Hearts

Lifetime has gotten a much deserved reputation for cheesy, ripped from the headlines movies where you laugh along with the movie. But recently has been buying movies to air (and maybe more importantly to add to their new subscription Lifetime Movie Club) that are actually making the rounds at movie festivals and are usually the types of movies that end up on one of the premium channels that do not even air in HD . Last year Stockholm, Pennsylvania, starring future Oscar nominee Saoirse Ronan, even nabbed a pair of Critics’ Choice TV Awards. Sure these movies still have very Lifetime Movies type themes, Stockholm, Pennsylvania was about a kidnapped child reuniting with a her family seventeen years later, they just do not have the cheesy connotation that made for Lifetime Movies tend to have.

The latest Lifetime acquisition, Jack of the Red Hearts was named Bentonville's 2015 Grand Jury Film Festival Award Winner but still has a theme familiar to Lifetime viewers. AnnaSophia Robb (Soul Surfer) plays a girl who bounced around foster care, now eighteen has to find a way to stay connected to her sister who is still in the system. This means taking out her nose ring, cutting out the streaks in her hair and getting a job. But that is not easy for a juvenile delinquent so she assumes the identity of a care taker unaware it is taking care of an autistic eleven year old.

Though pretty paint by numbers once you know the concept, of course the fake caregiver learns as much from the autistic girl as she I supposed to teach, but the movie is still very heartwarming with even some lighter moments sprinkled throughout despite the heavy subject matter, which one character desires as being co-workers in a mental hospital. It helps that the performances are strong all around. Robb is more believeable as the tender caregiver than the street smart hoodlum but the move really belongs to Taylor Richardson as the autistic Glory and the decision to shoot some scenes through her eyes to give the audience a small sample of what it looks like to be an autistic child.

Jack of the Red Hearts premieres tonight at 8:00 on Lifetime.

Previewing Earth Day 2016

Earth Day is this weekend and Nat Geo Wild is celebrating with a bunch of new premieres. First up is Mission Critical: Orangutan on the Edge. My first takeaway from the special is that I apparently have been mispronouncing the name of the species my whole life. I have been pronouncing the last syllable “tang” as in the fake orange juice powder drink. But the orangutan photographer in the special pronounces it like the last syllable in “Benetton.” But even he might be wrong because the narrator pronounces it “tan” as in the color. Looking at how it is spelled, I am beginning to think the narrator may be the right person of the three of us.

Being an episode of Mission Critical, you can tell that the orangutan (whose direct translation in “person of the forest”) population is dwindling and this episode takes us to Borneo, one of only two places on the planet where orangutans are indigenous to (neighboring island Sumatra being the other). And like many endangered species stories in recent history, the orangutan’s home is being shrunk thanks to deforestation so farmers can grow crops. Most of the special follows a new mother, an orangutan that the photographer has been following since she was just a baby orangutan herself. Unfortunately as the story of the shrinking habitat is not sad enough, this particular story also has a heartbreaking ending.

Full Earth Day (Friday) Schedule at a Glance:
6:30/5:30c: Wild to Inspire *PREMIERE*
7/6c: Cougars Undercover
8/7c: Mission Critical: Leopards at the Door
9/8c: Mission Critical: Orangutan on the Edge *PREMIERE*
10/9c: War Elephants


Also premiering on Nat Geo Wild is a new season of Unlikely Animal Friends. On the premiere you will meet a tiger and lioness; a human and an elephant with an amputated leg; a goat / antelope type creature that bonds with a dog who takes care of abandoned offspring at the Cincinnati Zoo; a tree kangaroo and a human, a cat and a rabbit; and a cat and a pig. Also this season you will see a goat that’s best friends with a pig; a dog that loves riding on the back of a miniature horse; a woman who helped save an Alaskan bald eagle and found it a prosthetic beak; a playful ferret and dog; a former military working dog and his retired Marine; and a duck that’s bonded with two cats! These stories profile the most unique, most surprising, and most loving animal friendships. Two dogs that love a raccoon; a dedicated caretaker who outfitted a miniature horse with a prosthetic leg; a German shepherd that became the surrogate mom to a baby fox; a woman who bonded with a bat; a cat that nurses sick and injured cats and dogs; and a camel that buddied up with a golden retriever. The world’s smallest stallion and his best buddy, a dog; two rhinos that are guarded by a sheep; a duck that improved a boy’s health; a golden retriever/chow mix that was rescued from Hurricane Katrina and is now an animal shelter’s “nanny” to kittens; a pig and his pooch; and a goat that cheers up patients in care facilities. A “nanny cat” that comforts animals at an animal shelter; two pygmy goats and their friend the Chihuahua; a woman who nursed an injured raccoon back to health; a Rhodesian ridgeback that helps raise a cheetah; an emu that’s the “surrogate sibling” to a boy; and a dog and a bunny that are inseparable buddies. A dairy goat that nursed a motherless Clydesdale foal; a green-cheeked conure that’s best friends with a much larger dog; a woman and her mischievously fun donkey; a husky that raised a kitten; a woman who’s gone above and beyond for a disabled cat; and a border collie that’s bonded with a sheep.

Unlikely Animal Friends airs Saturdays at 8:00 on Nat Geo Wild.

Previewing Second Chance Chihuahua

After a successful inaugural Barkfest, Nat Geo Wild is having its second annual event dedicated to man’s best friend. One of the new specials airing this weekend is dedicated to the smallest of the species, Second Chance Chihuahua premiering Saturday at 9:00. The show follows Laura Dash and Jim Peterson (who claim to have gone on the first internet date back in 1996) who run Dolittle’s Ranch in Studio City, California where they have rescued over 2,000 Chihuahua over the past ten years. There moto is the four R’s, “Rescue, Remedy, Rest, and Rehome.” In the episode they add a bunch of new Chihuahua to their rescue list including one who was hit by a car and has been waiting surgery for two months since the shelter does not have the money to pay to fix the dog’s leg. There is another Chihuahua who was abandoned because of a skin condition and another is one found roaming the LA River. Then there is a pack living in an abandoned building that looks like something one of the Ghost Hunter type shows would investigate.

Barkfest starts Friday at 9:00 and runs all weekend. Other premieres include: World’s Funniest Dogs (Friday at 9:00): Whether it’s chewed up shoes, or an extremely excited dog that tackles you like a linebacker, these cute but mischievous dogs are making their owners ask, “Oh, what did you do this time?!” Welcome to World’s Funniest Dogs. This special features some of the most unbelievable videos of dogs doing hilarious mischief. We also meet the owners and dogs to see if these loving troublemakers are still up to no good, or if they’ve reformed their ways.

Who’s Your Doggie? (Friday at 10:00): Ever meet a dog and wonder what breed it is? Where it gets its looks or its non-stop energy? Every day dog owners across America speculate exactly what their mutts are made of. Who’s Your Doggie? finally has the answer. In this special we take six dogs and dig deep into their family roots. After owners explain their mutts’ curious behaviors and physical traits, we bring in a team of experts to do their own analysis. Then we settle the score… with a DNA test. Using one of the most reliable labs in the world, each breed is revealed – and the results will shock you. With an almost endless list of breed combinations, Who’s Your Doggie covers the big, the small, the cute, and the downright crazy.

How Dogs Got Their Shapes (Sunday at 9:00): Man’s best friend comes in many different shapes and sizes. From the three-pound Yorkie to the 200-pound Great Dane, from a wrinkled shar-pei to the super sleek greyhound, it’s hard to believe that these creatures are all the same species. How Dogs Got Their Shapes will look at dogs from their cute noses to their adorable paws, learning the amazing ways that different breeds’ shapes have changed over time. Not just for show, these specialized features help dogs work, hunt, swim, corral, protect, hear and track. In this special, we’ll use a mix of science, history, and surprising, weird facts to learn all about today’s modern dogs.

Previewing The Detour

For years I have been questioning networks for greenlighting dramas that sound like they would make a good movie but how are they going to stretch the premise across ten to twenty-two episodes. Pretty much every one of them did not make it past their original run of episodes. Now TBS is airing the first half hour comedy which makes me wonder, so where do they go after the first batch of episodes? Really, the best way to describe The Detour is to call it Vacation: The Television Show. And if the viewers are lucky, it will be much more the Chevy Chase version than the Ed Helms reboot (spoiler alert, thankfully it is closer to Chase than Helms).

The Detour was created by The Daily Show vets and married couple Jason Jones and Samantha Bee. Jones plays the father on the show but since Bee has her own weekly political show on the same network, Natalie Zea plays the mother figure. Samantha really drew the short straw in that relationship; at night she has to talk about whatever stupid thing Donald Trump said that week and during the day watch dailies of her husband fondling Raylan Givens’ absurdly attractive baby mama.

Along for the ride are twins played by surprisingly not horrible child actors. The male half is the kind of person who is super confident that they are the smartest person in the room but is extremely uninformed about basically everything (can we officially call this the Donald Trump Syndrome). The female twin is the closest thing this family has to a voice of reason as her mouth is almost constantly a gasped to the stupid things her brother said and just straight up bad parenting by her parental figures.

National Lampoon was able to create about ninety minutes of entertaining road trip shenanigans, which comes out to about four episodes of televised comedies these days without commercials. Add the sequel, that is eight episodes. The big question is can The Detour keep it up for ten episode and beyond as the show has already been picked up for a second season. There is a The Affair type plot twist at the end of the first episode. Spoiler Alert, it does not involve any of the characters having an affair. Actually there really is no reason to have a spoiler warning for the first episode because the Pilot has been on YouTube for a couple days now; I have even embedded it below. If you prefer to watch it on your big screen television (and do not have the YouTube app) it is also available On Demand.

So the big twist (again, scroll down to watch if you do not want to be spoiled first) sees Jones being grilled by the FBI at the end of the episode for an undisclosed reason sometime in the future; far enough for him to grow a pretty thick beard, maybe a month or two. But before that Jones needs to get his family from Syracuse to Fort Lauderdale for a family vacation / work retreat (or so his family thinks as he gets fired right before the trip). And as you can tell by the title of the show, there are plenty of unexpected stops along the way, no dead aunts or backwoods cousins (there is a trainwreck of a sister left behind in Syracuse to cat sit; though she ends up having more to do as the show progresses), but still plenty of new hijacks including poor hotel accommodation in Pennsylvania (you do not want to know what the idiot son thinks it is spelled if you are native of the state; granted if you are annoying enough to root for the Steelers or Phillies, you probably have already thought of the joke before), a drunk tank, a culturally insensitive dining establishment in the south, a Bed and Breakfast run by Dr. Harold Abbott (like you have never seen before, and kind of hope to never see again), and of course they arrive in Florida just to run into a massive traffic jam which gives the parent enough time to tell their children the very inappropriate story of how they met.

For a show that is kind of a rip off of a thirty year old movie which already had a horrible reboot last year, The Detour is surprisingly not horrible. Sure TBS’s previous new comedy Angie Tribeca was significantly funny and it probably would only be the fourth funniest family comedy if it aired on ABC. But I did laugh plenty of times throughout the first few episodes, and funnier than the much critically adored Modern Family, even if some of it was uncomfortable laughter; the high point, or low depending how you look at it, comes in the two episodes Dr. Abbott shows up in.

The Detour airs Mondays at 9:00 on TBS. You can go ahead and watch the premiere now commercial free below or download it for free on iTunes or steam it on Amazon Instant Video.

Previewing Dice

Andrew Dice Clay is the most sophomoric comedian of all time; seriously, there really is nothing more childish than dirty nursery rhymes. You would think that would be right up my lane since I was an actual sophomore right around the height of his popularity. But he was even too immature for me at the most immature point of my life. Honestly, the only thing Andrew Dice Clay has ever been a part of that I enjoyed was his act being sampled by EMF for Unbelievable.


But I have matured in my old age, so maybe Clay has to so I figured I would give his new show, the appropriately titled Dice, a try. The show is another in the growing line of fake sitcoms based on real people (but have any besides Curb Your Enthusiasm actually been successful; anyone remember the Paul Reiser Show). Dice is quick to point out in the show that he is not his act and does not refer to women as piglets in real life (insert your own Trump parallels theories here). The problem is that pushing sixty Dice on the show is exactly what you would expect him to act after twenty-five years of not evolving. Dice could very well have been called Jersey Shore: Geriatric Edition.

Sure the premiere starts off with him attending the gay wedding of his girlfriend’s brother, how progressive of him (though his defense of homosexuality is quit crass) but the episode quickly devolves into him trying to win money at a casino to give the couple as a wedding gift which ends up taking most of the half hour. How not very progressive of him.

I guess one of the biggest allure in these fake sitcoms about real people is when they get their famous friends involved. The first person who runs into Dice is Adrian Brody who recruits the comic to help him becoming more manly. And not even for a new movie, but for a one man play (apparently even Adrian Brody forgot Adrian Brody was in a Predators movie to remind him of when he last acted manly). And that is about it. Sure a later episode features Rita Rutner, Criss Angel, and Wayne Newton calling Dice “(expletive deleted) face but it really is not a good sign when Chriss Angel is the best part of your show. And poor Lorraine Bracco, she does not even get to play herself. But at least she gets to play a hotel owner, Michael Rapaport shows up as “Bobby the Mootch.”

But through the whole season, Dice is still up to his old stick, it may not be a nursery rhyme, but in the first episode he changes the words of, “A horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse” where he swaps out “horse” for something I am not comfortable with repeating. But then again, maybe Dice has grown up a little, instead of dirty nursery rhymes; he is now making dirty Shakespeare monologues. I guess that is progress.

Dice airs Sundays at 9:30 on Showtime. If you have Showtime On Demand or Showtime Anywhere, you can watch all six episode starting Sunday.

Previewing House of Lies: Season Five

Last season on House of Lies, Marty learned Jeanie sold him out and basically he was up front about firing her after he got Kaan and Associates up and running and she basically could not go anywhere else as most firms are not in the practice of hiring very pregnant women. Not surprisingly, by the time Marty reached his goal, he had a change of heart and decided not to can his baby mama. What was surprising was that Jeanie turned him down to accept a job in the cooperate drug world.

But hey, why hold a grudge when there is money to be made. Despite the vast amount of water flowing under that bridge, Kaan and Associates are now consulting for Jeanie’s new company. Despite the shared child, both have moved on personally. Jeanie is now dating someone at her boner pill job played by Ken Marino (yes, you get to see Veronica Mars have sex with Vinnie Van Lowe). While Marino may be as far as you can get from Marty, Marty on the other hand has replaced Jeanie with another hot blonde. Except this one is an Instagram personality who wears less clothing.

While professionally, Kaan and Associates is booming, which leads to the return of Skip Gallweather. If that name sound familiar, it was one of the names on the masthead that Marty and the pod worked at in the early season. Sure Marty sank that firm, but again, if there is money to be made, that bridge can be built pretty easily. But really, the main reason to watch the new season is to watch Jeanie rap with Larry Bird (the alien from The Neighbors, not the actual basketball legend) which may be the best scene in the history of the show.

House of Lies airs Sundays at 9:00 on Showtime.

Previewing America's Greatest Makers

Mark Burnett was the first to bring reality television to the American networks with Survivor and now has four successful reality shows on three networks and he is not resting on his laurels (his name is actually on twelve shows currently in production). This time he is partnering with TNT for his newest show America’s Greatest Makers. With a title like that you may think, well, that kind of sounds like one of his other shows Shark Tank, and you will be right. Actually it kind of combines the elements of two of his shows, Shark Tank and The Voice.

Much like Shark Tank, contestants are pitching products, but instead of hoping for seed money, they must get three of the four judges (sorry, no spinning chairs, just a yes or no via a tablet, but there are lights on the floor like The Voice) to advance them to the next round with the last team standing getting a million dollars to fund their product. Much like The Voice, there is a finite number of spots in round two, fifteen (so sorry anyone who pitches late, maybe you get a better spot next season; and TNT does run two ads about applying for a second season so they are feeling pretty confident).

The four judges that each pitcher has to impress include Carol Roth, an on air commentator on CNBC where she covers big and small business, the economy, current events, politics, and pop culture. Kevin Pereira who I guess is best known for being having Olivia Munn as a sidekick on Attack of the Show and now is the co-host of Hack My Live. Brian Krzanich is the CEO of Intel (the subtitle of America’s Greatest Makers is actually “An Intel Experience”). The fourth chair is going to be a revolving door of guest judges. First up is TNT basketball commentator Kenny Smith and will also include his colleague Shaquille O’Neal, founder of Arduino Massimo Banzi, The Big Bang Theory’ss Mayim Bialik, and host of Dirty Jobs Mike Rowe.

Sure The Voice annoyingly makes its show more and more about the coaches, but is the contestants that really make the show and without good products, there is no America’s Greatest Makers. One thing I noticed in the first hour (aside from a very The Voice like sequencing of exactly on failed contestant per hour and a group of montage victims who advance but get about five seconds of screen time) is all but one of six groups that pitch in the first episode involve apps (the sixth is a light up jacket). Of all the products pitched in the first episode the one that piqued my interest was the Slapband. You mind might vaguely think of those bracelets in the eighties that high school girls would obsessively slap on their writs before the fad went away a year later, that is exactly what these are except this will give you your blood pressure eliminating those annoying arm pump things we have to use now. And of course all the information these collect get collected on an app on your smartphone.

When it comes down to it, America’s Greatest Makers just takes Shark Tank and puts in the competition reality show format. The first two episodes are where the contestants give their opening pitches. Then there are five “Make or Break Round,” where one team in each episode advances to the finale. Then the eighth and final episode, the five finalists bring their refined devices to the panel one last time for the chance to win one million dollar and the title America’s Greatest Maker. So if you like Shark Tank but want to spend a little more time with the inventors, you will probably enjoy America’s Greatest Makers.

America’s Greatest Makers airs Tuesdays at 9:00 on TNT.

Previewing The Story of God with Morgan Freemaan

God bless Morgan Freeman, the guy may be well past retirement age but still has four movies slated for release this year not to mention his growing number of narrator jobs. For the past six years he has been the voice and face of Through the Wormhole and now he is adding another hosting job to his resume in another otherworldly subject matter, The Story of God, premiering tonight on the National Geographic Channel.

This time around, Freeman is actually going across the globe to see how people celebrated God throught the years, whatever they called the entity. Each episode of The Story of Godwill center on one big question about the divine, from the mystery of creation, to the true power of miracles, to the promise of resurrection. The first episode deals with the view of the afterlife which takes Freeman from the pyramids of Egypt, to Jerusalem, currently the crossroads of three religions, where Jesus is believed to die in a time when everyone was Jewish. He also travels from Mexico to view the Day of the Dead, combining Aztec and Catholicism beliefs, to India where the locals believe in reincarnation. The episode ends in what may be the future of the afterlife: implanting our memories into artificial intelligence so we can live forever.

Future episodes of The Story of God focus on Creation – Are there similarities among the religious creation stories from around the world? How do they compare with the scientific theory of the creation of the cosmos and the dawn of civilization?. Who Is God? – How has the perception of God evolved over human history? Is God just an idea, and if so, can we find evidence of a divine presence in our brains? Evil – What is the root of evil and how has our idea of it evolved over the millennia? Is the devil real? The birth of religion may be inextricably tied to the need to control evil. Miracles – Are miracles real? For many believers, miracles are the foundation of their faith. Others regard miracles as merely unlikely events on which our brains impose divine meaning. Belief in miracles, however we define them, could be what gives us hope and drives us to turn possibility into reality. And the End of Days – Violent upheaval and fiery judgment fill popular imagination, but was the lore of apocalypse born out of the strife that plagued the Middle East two millennia ago? The true religious meaning of the apocalypse may not be a global war, but an inner revelation.

The Story of God with Morgan Freeman airs Sundays at 9:00 on the National Geographic Channel.